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Am I still a virgin if I've had oral, been fingered, and did anal?


Question Posted Sunday October 10 2010, 7:24 pm

My boyfriend asked me tonight if I was a virgin because he is and has never done anything at all. We've been dating on a couple weeks and I didn't know how to answer it though. This is why:

I've gave a few guys head
I've been fingered A LOT
I had anal twice
I masturbate like once a day

I never had like...sex sex, you know? Like the making babies kind LOL. You know what I mean. Does that mean I'm a virgin?


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Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Virginity?


ConsueloBabyy answered Monday October 18 2010, 7:50 pm:
Your still a virgin! Unless the penis goes in the VAGiNA then your still a virgin! hah

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Mandy116 answered Wednesday October 13 2010, 1:30 pm:
technicaly your still a virgin seeing as you have never had penis/vaginal penetration.

But i wouldnt leave your boyfriend thinking you so inocent seing as you have done quite a bit of fooling around.

I'd let him know that you've fooled around with previous guys.

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JayySayy answered Monday October 11 2010, 6:15 pm:
I think you should let him know about that then maybe he could be the one to say if your a virgin or not,just let him know thats the past and you like him only now {if you do) so your relationship wont be ruined.:)

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julie75 answered Monday October 11 2010, 5:00 pm:
You really should be honest because you could jeapordize your relationship in the future if he finds out about your past. I would say that you are not a virgin because you have had a penis in your mouth and your ass. Now if you had only been masturbating, even with toys, you would still be a virgin.

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jodieleighstewart answered Monday October 11 2010, 2:38 pm:
hello there,
I am not sure if fingering or masterbating counts but you have done anal so no you are not a virgin

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Juxtapose answered Sunday October 10 2010, 10:29 pm:
Just say Yes.
There is nothing he can do about your past. Do not pretend that you don't know anything. If he asks you where your learned how to do stuff, just say, "I read a lot".

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easilyfixed answered Sunday October 10 2010, 8:30 pm:
Too 99% of the world, you are still a virgin.
Its really how you look at it.

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solidadvice4teens answered Sunday October 10 2010, 8:03 pm:
Fingering= masturbation and has nothing to do with virginity and has no effect on that. Everything else is considered actual sex but most people equate virginity being lost with actual traditional intercourse and some don't. It's a taboo thing right now with no right answer or definition.

If you think you still are as you haven't had traditional sex than that's fine and you haven't. However, as you were told below by another poster your partner's idea of virginity may differ. You should tell your partner that you experimented with X, Y, Z and whether or not you wish you had or hadn't and how you see yourself as a virgin or not.

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Cux answered Sunday October 10 2010, 7:33 pm:
It's all about your personal definition in a lot of cases.

I think universally, vaginal sex is what people consider "sex sex".

Personally, anal sex is sex. So is oral sex. But if you don't see them as "sex sex" then you can call yourself a virgin, but it might lead your boyfriend astray.

I would just tell him what you've done so that way you aren't lying to him or giving him the wrong impression.

--Jack
(18/m)

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