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I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
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So I am 16 f and I have been self harming for about a year, yesterday my friend noticed some cuts on my arm and called my parents, they were so upset as they had no idea that it had been happening. I think that they are angry at me and at themselves and they keep asking me questions about it. the problem is that is why i didn't tell them in the first place, I didn't want to hurt them or make them disappointed in me. When they ask me things like why do you do it and are you happy I don't know what to tell them, I do feel happy and I don't know why I do it. I guess it's just hard to know what to say to them to let them know it's not their fault and that I am just weird. (link)
You are not weird but have a mental compulsion driving what you are doing. You don't know why the constant desire to harm but have to get out in front of it and stop it from going on further.

It really has nothing to do with happiness or your parents doing anything "wrong" for it to exist. It's a mental health issue. What you need to do is tell a doctor about it. You're not crazy nor do you need to be to be referred to a psychiatrist.

This individual can help treat what is at the root of the problem, empower you and help you end doing this. You need the counseling, possibly medication and the assistance of a mental health professional to succeed.


Okay so I feel myself a lesbian because I like the girl in school....I think it's okay to like her but then I feel weird and not normal when I getting to like her.I REALLY WANT TO STOP!!! I DONT WANT TO HAVE A BAD FUTURE....Thank You (link)
Who said anything about a bad future if your orientation is in fact gay? You will still have a productive and happy life or the one you have now in long run.

Have you always liked girls or just this one person in particular? Do you also like men? It may be too early to figure out orientation and this may be curiosity if not something that has always been the case.

I think what you should do is talk to someone be it a teacher, counselor, therapist confidentially and tell them you aren't sure about any of these feelings and whether you are gay, straight or bi-sexual and are troubled about it.

There are a lot of great resources out there including PFLAG who can help empower you and deal with figuring this out and if gay etc. how to deal with family and being open about it. No matter what things will be okay long term.


Also, he recommended I take a prescription toothpaste with 5x the normal amount of fluoride, to brush 2 times daily with it, AND not to rinse my mouth after using it. I feel it sounds pretty dodgy, because I've been googling about fluoride lately, and it says it's bad for humans to consume it in large amounts. I mean, I generally brush once a day, and floss once a week, which I can improve, but I don't feel I want to do so with so much fluoride, when there are side-effects. But when I asked my dentist about the potential side effects, he just brushed them off like they were nothing, and thought the fluoride-free toothpastes at Whole Foods were ineffective in preventing cavities. I feel queasy about it. I mean, It's a great dental office, and it was my first time trying it out, but yeah.. Am I right for being cautious about this? I don't want to be taken advantage of. (link)
Definitely. Dentists are in the business to help people but also in the business to keep their practice opening and have X amount of clients as quota to do so.

When it comes to toothpaste, brushes, drugs, floss etc. they do indeed get financial kickbacks from companies who get them to endorse products or prescribe certain medications over others.

Some of the dishonest types also find ways to bill you or an insurance company too much or for services they didn't provide or for more blocks (time) than they did.

If you aren't sure why this dentist prescribed this kind of toothpaste and he's brushed off your concern about it forget him and don't go back. Unless he's told you your teeth are bad and need this than see someone else and have them check your teeth without saying anything and see what they tell you to do then tell them another dentist recommended this paste and brushed off your concerns about flouride and what it does.

As far as asking about liquids you consume that's standard. Coffee, sugary drinks, pop etc. can ruin enamel and cause issues with teeth. If you feel queasy at all about this dentist than trust your gut.

The prescription may also be warranted for whatever dental issue you had but do check things out and become comfortable and educated about it or if it's not needed and not a good fit for you walk away and get another dentist who can be brutally honest and at the same time address every decision he's making and what you need versus do not.

As far as flouride in water in the U.S. several organizations including churches such as Christian Science for example tried to fight government to have it not added to drinking water because they knew how bad it was considered to be and is to be absolutely frank.


In October 2012, my church had an AWESOME revival that changed my life. It lasted from Sunday morning to Wednesday night for about two or three hours a service and I STILL couldn't get enough of hearing the guest pastor.

He was the greatest pastor I've ever heard and in many of his services, he talked about how he was a cancer survivor. I heard today on the news that he is dealing with cancer again. He lives about an hour away from me and is pretty popular where he lives
The news story was about how a local football team was honoring him by putting his initials on their football helmets for the next game.

My question is should I send this guy a card or a gift or something to let him know that I'm thinking about him? He'd have no idea who I was because we never personally met, but he'd know my church. Would that be too weird, or do you think he'd appreciate that? (link)
That may be the one thing that he needs to help even for a few moments deal with what he is up against. If he sees that he has affected a random person's life so much and is valued that will help him have hope.

It's a very loving thing to do that not a lot of people would think of. A card letting you know you are thinking of him and what he has done to inspire you is a great gesture. Definitely do so. I wouldn't send flowers though. As for a gift of some sort that's fine. There's no wrongs there. It's what your gut says to do or give.


me and my friends are making a shopping app just like ebay and all for android as our college project. so we want to make an app that is different from ebay or any other shopping app. so what changes should we make in order to make it different from other apps? we have added group chat in which you can chat about all stuffs that you have shopped and all.. so please give me all your suggestions.. we would be happy to make an app for you. (link)
This sounds like a question where you are asking us to do your assignment and dirty work for you. I'm being blunt here that you won't learn or achieve anything special that you could have if you worked as a team to answer these questions.

That is what you really need to do. As a team collectively come up with ten god and bad things current apps aren't doing and come up with a core belief on how to fix it and make it different from anything out there. It's on you to do that.

Try creating a focus group on campus by putting up fliers at the library or student association hang out or lounges etc. Pick no more than 10 random people and start asking them questions pertaining to shopping and apps and what they think you need to be different.

Tape this on a digital recorder so you have notes and then draft a report for your project on how you took what they said and made an app. Use real people rather than anyone online and you'll not only have an app but make a real splash with your prof. You have to do the hard work here not us.


I'm 14 and I recently had to cut my hair because it was too long. I cut off probably 5-7 inches. It's now a mid-shoulder length or something. Well my friend said I look like a "cute ten year old", now I'm self concious of going anywhere. I straighten my hair to make it look longer too, but I don't want to look like a child.. (link)
Your friend could be joking or at worse just doesn't feel your haircut suits you. However, that's her opinion and as others have stated not that of anyone else. Maybe there is jealousy there too that you look better than her.

Here's what I would do find an adult other than a family member you value an opinion from. Pick a teacher for instance. Tell them you're feeling bad because someone insulted you about your hair and said you looked like a 10-year-old.

Ask them to be brutally honest about what they think. You'll find you don't have much to say negative about it and or can offer you suggestions to look your age if need be.

If that idea doesn't work for you go an visit a different hair salon and tell them your friend insulted you about the hair cut and told you that you looked way younger than your actual age. See if they think there is anything that needs fixing and if so perhaps they can make it look the way you really want.


Well I'm extremely shy and I like this guy in my class (I'm 12 by the way) and we talk and I think he flirts but I'm not sure if he likes me or not or if he is just being friendly like for example I told my friend that I didn't know the name of the guy I liked and he said my names (Enter name here) and I said funny smiled and blushed, basacally I need help to know if he likes me or not. Thnx for your help whoever reads this :) (link)
Start talking to him like you would anyone else. It's not much different except that it may lead to more than a friendship. Get to know him that way. I'm sure if he likes you he feels equally as awkward about it as you are feeling.

What you could do is put together a group for bowling, go-karting, movie whatever and invite him to it. If he has interest in you he will definitely go if not he will likely have an excuse.

You could also ask him if he would be open to grabbing a coffee somewhere or hanging out some time and see the response you get. Either way you need to take a risk. The worst thing is he isn't interested or says "no". That way you'll know for sure if you're wasting energy on him or not.

You also need to understand that 12-years-old is a bit young for dating. Girls mature faster than guys. While you may be mature and ready to handle dating he may not have got far along in puberty to have the same maturity and interest in you that you're hoping for.

He could one minute be interested and the next doing kid stuff or acting like a kid. At this stage both sexes change their feelings and likes faster than the weather. Be prepared for this kind of thing with your peers. Don't let it discourage you from trying though.


F/18
I am currently taking some martial arts classes with one of my best Friends. Usually I don't pay attention to how a person looks or even think about things like having a boyfriend. There are times however where I might find someone attractive. That happens with one of the boys in my classes. I'm usually very shy and not straight forward with guys I like, therefore I barely talk to him. I talked to him once where both I and my bestie talked to him. The next time I saw him, when my best friend and I came in, he went straight to say hello to my best friend, didn't even acknowledge me. I already have a lot of self-esteem problems, so that was the cherry on top of my iceberg. I felt so depressed afterwards it was sad really. Then in the last class I never talked to him but neither did my best friend because some blonde was talking to him - that's what my bff said. He doesn't seem like the womanizer or disrespectful type, which is one of the things I find attractive about him. My problem is that I don't know if I should try to... you know, get him to notice me as more tan a friend. If so... what the hell do I do, because I am totally clueless as to what a guy could find attractive in me. (Just in case, I'm pretty plain; dark long hair, dark eyes, skinny figure, fair skin... see?) (link)
You need to stop viewing yourself through a dirty mirror. Until you do that you will never be happy or see the true beauty that has been there the whole time. There's nothing plain about you. You're interesting and I'm sure you're fine psychically.

The only difference between you and your friend is how you feel about yourself. That's it. If you work with a counselor on this and build your self-image up you will do fine. You don't have anything less to give than anyone else to this guy. You may have even better qualities.

If you like him try talking to him about the one thing you have in common: martial arts. Ask him about how long he has been training, what you are studying etc. Ask him if he'd like another friend because you thought that he seemed like a nice guy.

See how he responds to that. You could go one step further and throw a mixer by going bowling etc and gauge if he has any interest in you from that. A guy that likes you will want to go and one that doesn't will come up with a variety of reasons not to. Don't fret it's him and not you.
You have no reason at all not to try.

There's a lot guys will find attractive in you and qualities you possess. Just think really hard and honestly about all your good points. People are attracted to that. They're also attracted to people who just be themselves and not care about anything else. You need to get to that place.

He may not have approached you and other guys may not have because they see you projecting an image of not being confident in yourself or too shy or not bothering with them.

As far as talking to any guy you'll succeed when you talk to them as you would any friend, family member etc, teacher, adult etc. etc. because conversing with them is exactly the same and should be natural not forced. Just talk to him and let things flow. You're too busy trying to make things unfold for yourself rather than letting it all come.


I signed up for a film analysis class because I thought it would be fun and it sounded interesting. I have already missed the first class because I signed up late and I have missed out on so much work. I read through the syllabus and it is a lore more intense than I imagined. There is about 100 pages of reading to do before each class and the professor seems very strict. And most of the people taking it are cinematography majors, which I am not. Unfortunately it is after the add/drop term, so I cannot just easily drop it. What should I do??? Stick with it, or withdrawal? (link)
Stick with it. You haven't even tried to give it a chance. The reading may be a challenge but it's not as though it can't be done.

You'll learn a lot about film and about yourself for staying with something that may look hard at first. No doubt the others feel it's daunting as well whether they are cinematography majors or not.

If I were you I would talk to some of the other students in the class and get a tutor from it or a study group going as that may help you grasp the material easier.

Also, if you have 100 pages to read try scanning and highlighting only that which you think is most important and make notes, tabs, post-its to help you remember the facts first. Then Pace yourself over the course of a few days to read the pages and make sure nothing was missed. You can do this. Don't fear failure.


I've known my best friend for nearly a year. We recently took a 3 week break due to arguments.
Well, we started talking again and... I feel like I may be better off without her. I'm homeschooled so she's my only friend (Literally my ONLY friend). But she's just kind of mean. She thinks it's funny to insult people and she gets into a lot of fights and stuff. She's always been there for me, but would I be better off without her in my life? I would have no friends though.. I have social anxiety, so it's difficult to socialize. (link)
Perhaps she has some kind of learning or other problem where empathy for others isn't apparent or where she can't see that insulting others for amusement isn't right.

You should tell her that one of the reasons you fight is that she does this perhaps without thinking and can be mean sometimes without even trying. It may be doing her a HUGE favor to learn this as no doubt she's pissed a lot of people off before without seeing it.

You have to figure out whether it's your gut instinct kicking in that she's not worth it or just something that you thought about because she hurt you and will fade. If it won't fade than maybe you are right and that's okay.

The whole issue about friends is a tough one. If you talk to a doctor about your anxiety disorder mention this unhealthy friendship and not wanting to ditch someone for fear of being alone. They may have tips and be able to introduce you to youth dealing with the same problem who could be friends.

Also, you never mentioned why you home-school. At this point in your life perhaps entering a regular school would be good for you and lead to friends especially if teachers know what you struggle with and students as well. The potential to meet good people there is great. You would have to work hard with a doctor on dealing with anxiety though. Something to talk to your family about--all of this about the friend.


Hi, I am a fifteen year old girl. I have sung ever since I can remember. I have sung in church, school, talent shows, and festivals. I live in a considerably small town, after all, it is the folk capital of the world. I just love the feeling of singing on stage, and I know it's going to be hard work, but I want to do that for the rest of my life. How can I get "noticed" in a small town? Any suggestions? (link)
By keeping up what you are doing now and being the best you can possibly be as a singer, dancer, actress. People will find you. The reality is that NOT everyone gets discovered.

Secondly, it's NOT about becoming famous that matters. This is about loving what you do and sharing your gift in whatever arena large or small you can and loving what you are doing.

Fame is a by-product of this that happens when you are the best at what you do and a have a name for yourself.

If you live near a large city you can go on ACTRA (for Canada) or SAG'S web site for the U.S. They are the actor's union in each of those country and more or less a watchdog and an actor's protection on set.

What they have on the sites is a list of reputable agents. Find a couple that represent kids/teens. They can get you print work, commercials, TV etc if they think you're worth representing.

Don't sign with anyone who is NOT on the list. There's a damn good reason why they aren't. This means you avoid potential scammers and other bad people in the industry.

While at that site look for a listing of reputable "Background Agents" These people will book you for crowd scenes on whatever TV, film may be on location in your city. This will give you a real taste of what goes on when making a movie and show you what an intense environment it is and 18 hour shoots sometimes. Again don't sign with anyone NOT on the list of agents.

Classic scams while I here: Never sign with anyone who wants an upfront fee to represent you. They should only make money from commissions when you get hired for a job. Do NOT pay for a portfolio of pictures ever.

You don't need it. Casting directors only need an 8*10 that is easily laser copied and submitted by your agent. Next run screaming from anyone who wants an upfront fee for representation and to put your name and picture into an internet page that casting directors will hire you from. It's BS. Casting directors do not cast anyone that way.

The only exception to the money issue and this is important is when you have an agent who represents only Kids and Teens or an agent who represents "Background Talent" only.

Because kids, teens, their parents and most people who are extras bail when they see this is work said agent can charge $100 a year per rules with the unions to protect their livelihoods.

Hopefully, this will help you. Keep plugging away at youth theater, competitions and wherever you can be seen and have fun with it first and foremost. If things pan out and you become known great but if not.. As long as you love it and do it well someone will notice and appreciate you on some level.


21/f, 27/m

I'm seeing a guy that has been asking questions that somewhat concerns me. I'm not sure if he's just being curious or that he feels this comfortable to talk to me in this way and ask me these questions.

Let me first say that I'm Asian and he's Caucasian. I will say that I'm pretty conservative and I feel like respect, loyalty, and honesty is very important to me.

Yesterday, maybe he was just saying it but he would point out that a girl is hot or say stuff like, "GILF" or "MILF" to me. I feel awkward whenever he says that because I never point out things like that. He'd mention that he thinks I'm pretty and he'd compliment me but it makes me feel uncomfortable when he says things like that. I know that guys will always look at girls but to tell the person you're dating? I'm not sure if that's something that needs to be heard.

Another thing he asked me yesterday, he said, "why do Asian girls like white guys? There's so many of them that like them." And I got a little confused because most my Asian girl friends have Asian boyfriends. I told him, "I haven't ran into a lot of them. I think if Asian guys were more outgoing and less predictable, they'd probably be able to keep their Asian woman? I'm not sure." And he said, "Huh, I see so many that like white guys."

Those are just examples of what he has said and mentioned. He has obviously said more that has caught my attention (not in a good way).

Is he trying to say something? Or is he just that comfortable to ask and say things like that? He says that he's curious but I feel like there may be more to what he is saying. (link)
You have raised a very good point and in a way answered your own question without thinking about it.

The key words here are "I'm uncomfortable" Any time your gut screams that to you it's not good. If he keeps saying things that make your uncomfortable, are vulgar or make you feel icky or weird than the issue is with him for sure.

Maybe he's clueless and has a problem with this stuff and doesn't know he shouldn't be saying it. Even if that's true he still needs someone to correct him about it and you don't have to put up with it a second longer.

I would speak to him and say "I'm really having second thoughts about us dating. You have made me extremely uncomfortable with X,Y,Z either this ends now or this is done."

It's one thing to be curious about certain things but when you're being creepy, vulgar, perverted even and making someone ultra uncomfortable there's a problem.

I think you know by now that he's not someone you should be with as the discomfort you are in now would appear to increase as this seems to be a part of his character and not something you can change especially if he can't see the issue.


I'm a 16 year old girl.

A few days ago, my friend gave my number to a guy who lives a couple towns away from us. He started texting me, saying he was bored and all. We chatted for a couple days and he wanted to know what I looked like (he doesn't have a facebook) so I sent him some of the pictures I have up on facebook. He sent one back. Later, he said the email had been deleted and he asked for more pictures. I sent him a couple more (we had been flirting) and one of them was slightly scandalous. I was in a t-shirt and underwear, but you couldn't see anything terrible and it was basically innocent.
A couple days later, my friend tells me that someone had "nudes" of me. Of course, I was flustered. I didn't send the guy anything bad, but it still makes me nervous that he's spreading rumors. I texted him asking why he was such an asshole about the situation, and he got extremely defensive and just called me a whore.
I want to take some sort of action about this whole thing. I've been trying to track down his mom to email her or something but I can't find her. What should I do? This is extremely upsetting to me. (link)
Tell your parents everything that has happened as you wrote it here. You will not be in trouble. Let them know who gave this person your number. Tell your folks you thought pictures were a normal request until you learned of what someone told you.

They will know how to deal with it and should bring the matter forth to school administration. It needs to be because who knows who else this is happening to that hasn't stepped forward.

I would get all your texts printed out and NOT contact this person further or send off any e-mail to anyone about it. Let adults deal with this for you as they are most equipped and know the law and what is illegal etc.

Even though you aren't sure if it's the guy who is doing this or your so-called friend who gave him the number they both need to be brought up to adults and you should steer clear of whomever it was because they're bad news.

The transmitting via e-mail, text or any method of any kind of picture of someone underage in a state of undressed is illegal and the people who are sending/receiving such material knowingly will definitely be charged for it.

Like I said, tell your family and get adults you trust involved to take proper action for you. You have every right to be upset and to feel violated here but you must come forward with the truth of what is happening to get action and stop these people from doing this to others.

There is a remote chance that this guy is caught up in it and your so-called friend is behind all of this but as you cannot be sure both of them need to be mentioned and brought to the attention of adults.


Yea but a couple people are telling me to tell him and others are telling me not to because he told someone his girlfriend was the best girlfriend he's had. So idk what to do. Were bestfriends I tell him everything except this (link)
You need to edit this question to tell us what it's about and in response to. It's hard to know what you are referencing here with thousands of questions coming in. Once we have that info you'll no doubt find answers to it.


First of all, if you get offended when someone doesn't believe in god just stop reading now, not because I'll bash your religion (I would never do that) but because I don't want to press my religion onto you. I'm only a 14 year old girl, so I know that a lot of you will tell me that I'm too old to pick my religion and that I should just do what I'm told, right? Please just hear me out. It could be due to the fact that God was never pressed on me because I only went to church long enough to get first holy communion or it could be due to the fact that I'm creative and like to test the boundaries and question things, but I don't believe in God or religion. I'm bisexual and I've only told a few people because my parents would say I'm going to hell (they're very, very catholic) and I really don't find it logical that there's an invisible man in the sky who created the world and will send you to the fiery underworld if you break his rules but that he loves you. I want to be a scientist, and science and religion clash no matter what way you put it, and there's just so much more evidence contributing to the Big Bang and natural selection and things like that. And it sounds to me like the bible was written by a bunch of homophobic, violent, sexist, sexually frustrated men. I just don't believe it, but I would be shunned if I ever said anything bad about god so I can't tell my parents. I worry about what happens after death though. I kinda believe that there might be some sort of god, but not a magical person, just somewhere we go after death. Do I sound like I'll stay atheist or don you think that this is just a phase? Am I making the right choice for when I'm older and my religion might matter as far as my family life goes? (link)
The bible is around 2,000 years-old give or take with my math but you'll still see my point. It has been translated into a multitude of languages and the stories in it from person to person until written down and interpreted in a multitude of ways.

What I'm saying is a lot of these people your parents included may call themselves Christians but sure don't act like it. They're no closer to God than anybody else. In fact, perhaps removed far from it.

Anybody who says you're going to go to hell or a fiery underworld for not believing their version of the bible is well, wrong and daft. But you can't convince a zealot of that. People can believe what they would like when it comes to religion unless they are hurting other people or forcing their belief on others.

You can't change nor choose your sexuality and if they judged on that it's on them and not you. Be who you are no matter what your sexuality or you'll be miserable.

When it comes to the Bible and Genesis for that matter there are two accounts. In one God looked at everything and creation as good and creation reflecting him. The second account is of Adam and Eve and disaster and man as mortal and all the fiery stuff you mentioned. But which interpretation is right? There's also a verse about the kingdom of heaven being here and now.

I'm just driving home it's all in interpretation and that if there's a God and he's loving than... Same thing with death. Your beliefs aren't going to land you in hell.

The thing is people use this kind of thing to control people who don't accept their ideology. I wouldn't worry about it. Just be concerned with being a good person no matter what you believe. You're closer if there is a God to the fact that he's not a magical entity that will either sanctify or roast you based on adherence to any belief system others force on people.


Everyone is saying my bestfriend likes me because of the way he acts and the way he talks to me were really close and I chilled with him all weekend this weekend and actually slept in the same bed with him twice and Saturday morning after a party he tells me he was about to kiss me the night before...BUT! He was talking to a girl then and on Labor Day he asked her out.. So does he like me? Or not? (link)
Tell him that you are really confused. Ask him why did you ask so-and-so out when last night you were trying to kiss me?

Find out where things stand and then you can tell him how you had been feeling. If you are best-friends there's no way that being truthful even if you don't wind up together will mess up that friendship.


My friend and i were just at the pool hanging out and these boys came up to us and started talking to us. We thought they were nice...but we thought wrong. They took us to the shallow end and started jumping on us and then they started touching us... IN THOSE PLACES!! We tried all we could to get away from them but we couldn't get away. Then they started doing that with us. we felt their you-know-whats on our frontal privates and our back privates. so basically what I'm trying to say is that they ra*** us. when they finally stopped, we got out of the pool and started crying. I need something to keep my mind off of wanting to beat the living hell out of all of them but nothing is working. Usually music and dancing is what gets my mind off of things, but not this time. Can you give me any songs or anything to do to not want to beat the living hell out of them and am able to go to the pool without remembering what happened? (link)
It sounds as though you know exactly who the boys are and where adults can find them. That's a good thing.

What you need to do is tell your parents exactly what you said here about them grabbing you inappropriately, pressing themselves against you etc. etc. and that you and the other girls told them NO.

Your parents will know that this is sexual assault and will know exactly what needs to be done about reporting it to people in law enforcement so that these guys can't go on doing it to other girls and women. You need to speak up and speak out on this.

You also NEED support from adults to know that you yourself and the other girls did nothing wrong and to deal with this. They should get you counseling and someone to talk to about this and to empower you. The music etc. helps but you really need this on top.

I would talk to your parents about loving swimming and wanting to enjoy that pool like anyone else but are scared to go back and to run into these people again or trigger a very bad memory. They will know how to proceed.

This is one of those icky situations that you don't keep to yourself. You need to tell your family or these idiots will keep getting away with it and you won't get the help you need from adults who can deal with them head on.


I'm a 14 year old girl and I have terrible social anxiety. For example, last week a store clerk tried to make small talk with me while I was checking something out and my face went red and I just kinda laughed at his friendly little jokes I a way that sounded more like wheezing and after paying I almost ran out of there without my change and he probably thought that I was mental! I can't give presentations in class or anything and to top it all off I start at a new school tomorrow so I'll have to make new friends (not like I've ever had more than one or two friends but I tend not to talk to my friends anyway). The thing is, I'm a good actor and a decent signer so I want to joi the drama club at my new school but I almost have a panic attack just thinking about talking to people and getting g on a stage in front of them. How do I help myself? (link)
If he thought you were "mental" that would be his problem and NOT yours. You aren't. People with mental health issues are not to be scorned.

They are illnesses just like Cancer, AIDS diabetes and need to be seen by society as such. Just because they deal with the brain people have stigma about them because they don't know better.

YOUR QUESTION: You really should see your family doctor at your first opportunity. Your issue is a medical one and with anxiety that is stopping you in your tracks and affecting your ability to function normally.

Have you had a panic attack? If you have or feel as though you are on the brink of them tell your doctor. They will be able to prescribe medication that could help you and diagnose further the problem and find the right treatment.

That's what I would do. They may refer you to a psychiatrist (you're not crazy) as they deal with severe anxiety disorders if in fact you have one. But do look into this. No need to suffer with it. Talk to your parents about how you are doing. Show them this question.


So over a month ago, me and my best friend has a pointless argument. We both said some pretty hurtful words. She said she would never talk to me again. I thought she didn't mean it because she always eventually talked to me but.. I haven't heard of her since the end of July.

I miss her so much. I don't go to her school, she changed her number, I don't know her address.. I just miss her so much and there's literally nothing I can do. What should I do? What CAN I do? (link)
Does she use e-mail or social media? That may be your best bet or going through a mutual friend if there is one to get a card or note delivered to her. Do any of her family go to school with you or have a connection?

The problem is you need to understand that whatever you were arguing over wasn't trivial to her and that there was something big in her perception at least to warrant never talking to you again.

Explain in your note that you understand that now and that a lot of time and changes have happened with you both. Tell her that you would like to discuss things with her again in hope that your friendship will one day be restored and that you miss her.

After that it's really up to her to come around. I would have to tell you that if she doesn't after you being friends for years from the sounds of your question that the issue is with her not you. If she throws it away even with an apology and olive branch extended than the friendship really wasn't stable to begin with. Ultimately, after apologizing it's on her to make a choice to hear you out or not. I wouldn't worry if you tried everything. I don't know the crux of the argument you had but most people assess things and work them out. It looks like she's incredibly sensitive if it was just a run of the mill fight most people have.


I'm a 14 almost 15 year old girl and I feel like I masturbate way to often. I masturbate about once a day but sometimes I do it 2-3 times a day depending on how I'm feeling. It doesn't get in the way of my schedule or anything because I do it in my bed at night. Is this to often? I feel like no one else masturbates, so that just makes me feel worse. (link)
You have received a lot of solid responses to your question. I won't rehash what is contained them. I felt I should address the "I feel I'm the only one who does this and nobody else does."

You aren't. In fact, the majority of your peers are doing but aren't talking about it or will admitting to it to peers. Chalk it up to stigma. This is true of both males and females your age. It's pretty much a universal thing at this stage of life that most are doing.

Frequency doesn't matter. As long as you have a life apart from it you're fine and you've indicated that's the case.

There's all kind of statistics out there about percentage of males and females who engage in it versus those who don't.

Males are considered to do it more. They are pretty much aware from day one of their genitals and must touch to urinate. Female genitals are more hidden and internal.

One article I read suggested what I mentioned plus the fact females tend to be more discreet about talking about these things. It may skew the percentage one way or another. At either rate most males and females will engage in this activity and some point. Your peers no doubt are doing it so I wouldn't feel in the least bit ashamed or embarrassed over it. As long as you feel comfortable with it you're normal.




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