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I aim to give you solid advice on your problems. I don't sugarcoat things and I'm always straight up. Don't come asking for what you want to hear as I always give the truth even if you don't want it because it's what you need and the only way to grow.
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Last Update: June 30, 2015
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21/f, 28/m

I have been with this guy for 7 months now. I know I must be reading too much into this, but I noticed that he posted on Facebook that a woman older then him, asked him a few questions because he looked so young and was curious as to how he got his job, etc. His friends commented on it saying that he should have asked her out on a date, that she was into him, etc. He liked the comments but said that she was a bit too old and not his type. Which, pretty much made it clear that nobody really knows about me.

I've asked him before if anybody knows that he's seeing me, he said no. He says he's a private person who doesn't talk about himself a lot. A close friend of his knows about me and so does his house mates (my guess is because they see me at their house), but that's about it.

I'm the type of person who tells others if he/she asks if I'm seeing anybody. Which, majority of the time, people do ask. It seems like he's somewhat bothered by it but I don't really understand why.

I know there's a difference between secrecy and privacy, but it makes me curious if he's keeping me a secret and telling other people that he's not seeing anybody when they ask. Am I thinking too much into it or should I just wait for awhile before talking about it with him? (link)
Maybe there is someone else and maybe not. Perhaps he is unsure if you are going to be a steady girlfriend or not. At any rate he's behaving like an ass and the whole "I'm a private person" line is pure and utter BS.

There is some reason why he doesn't want to acknowledge the relationship or you to friends, family whomever and that's not right. Either he's with you and proud of it or he's not. Put your foot down and tell him either he tells people you're together or you're leaving because you aren't wasting time waiting on someone who has no clue what he wants.

He's treating you like a doormat and this behavior isn't right. I think you deserve better and should look for it. I wouldn't want to be with anyone embarrassed, ashamed or whatever else to acknowledge who I am. You shouldn't put up with that kind of shit. He's in the wrong and has serious explaining to do.

I've been with a girl for about 6 months and she has a daughter that's almost 2. She works a lot of overtime of provide for her (she's very low income), and has pointed out that the baby daddy never wanted her and didn't do anything to help support her when they were together. She left the baby daddy shortly after her daughter was born when she lived in his state and moved back here. He has not visited his daughter since or paid barely any child support. According to her, he has never even had a job, but has an associates degree. She says she is trying to sue him for child support. Is it wrong that she still is friends with him on Facebook then? She even responds and laughs at some posts he puts up to be funny. He asks how they are doing once a week through there but doesn't make any efforts to do anything else. He doesn't call or visit. She told me he wouldn't sign over his parental rights since he wants to leave it open to come back into their life since "part of him still loves" my girlfriend. I'm having a hard time accepting how she wants to have any relationship with him, despite him not visiting or providing support. Is she just going easy on him or is this a bigger red flag? Do I have to accept how friendly they are, even though he's not there for them? (link)
Not a red flag. She has years of history with this guy and a daughter by him. She is trying to maintain cordial relations with him and hopes he gets his shit together and pays attention to his kid. There's no love there but people together that long can have some kind of civil interaction and contact.

That's all. Nothing to get jealous about or concerned over. However, if she is to successfully sue him for child support she needs to cut out the Facebook, trying to maintain a relationship online or off or a lawyer can easily point to a judge or his lawyer that she's pushing for a relationship of some kind and trying to sue him at the same time.

Could she go harder on him and ask him to clean p his life, get a job, pay for his kid's needs and be an active parent hell yes. She should but it's up to him for the follow trough. She could cut him off all together but that may do nothing and may getting money from him a lot more difficult. Either she sues him and has no more to do with him or she doesn't. It has to be her choice but you can suggest all this and tell her exactly how you feel and if you considered leaving over it.

She may lose a legal fight and money for her kid that way. If she isn't suing him either now or in the future than she can maintain a civil interaction with him. You don't have nor need to like this but it's her choice.

But I did not go deep not even an inch but I still bked.I have long nails though ;'( (link)
That would do it as would being too vigorous. Sounds like they were sharp and you nicked yourself. Bottom line trim your nails as that can cause bleeding, discomfort and irritation as you described. You're fine though. Nothing to worry about.

I'm looking for a really accurate plagiarism checker, because I'm really sick and tired from those which are inaccurate. I need the checker to show 100% precise results!!! Please, do not suggest free ones. Thanks! (link)
If I read this correctly you're looking for an online tool or electronic device, app or whatever to accurately detect the presence of plagiarism. I haven't heard of such a thing.

The best way to detect is to know the subject the person is writing about well and do your research and cross reference as many online, print and other sources to ensure the individual didn't lift without attribution.

If you're scared that it's you that is inadvertently copied, worded or lifted something than my advice would be to trust your gut and strike it out of there and or not to consult any sources, papers, documents about a subject until yours is done and complete. Nobody could accuse anyone then.

I'm 13 years old and in a few weeks I'm going to the doctors to talk about my anxiety. I'm afraid that if I get put on medication it'll change who I am, like I will start taking more risks and hurt myself. The alternative would be getting put in therapy but what does a therapist really do? I already talk about it to my mom and friends so how will talking to a therapist help? I'm just really nervous please answer if you could help me with any of these questions. Sorry for the lack of information, I had to do this quickly. Also please tell me have any ideas on how to bring up these topics my mom. Thanks! (link)
Anxiety disorders are a psychiatric disorder and need a mental health professional be it a shrink or psychologist NOT a regular therapist. It needs constant monitoring and counsel.

Medication won't change who you are or rob you of your personality, talents and other things that make you who you are. What it will do over time and being patient is make symptoms and affects of your illness dormant so you can live a normal and productive life free of anxiety attacks and thoughts. I recommend you do it asap.

What does the mental health professional do? Well for starters they figure out what your symptoms are and how anxiety affects you and what triggers an attack. They offer tips, monitor your medication and thoughts and make sure you aren't needing emergency help and are progressing normally and functioning without fear of having a problem reoccur.

Tell your mother the truth about what you are feeling and be brutal about not being able to function and ask that she take you to a doctor or emergency room if considered an emergency situation. Believe me she will get you help no question if you ask for it.

My family is very into hunting and I'm a vegitarian so I don't hold the same idea about it that they do. They say that deer are the most beautiful animals in Pennsylvaina, and that they are the most amazing animals around. How can they say this and look forward to killing them? I've asked them before but they never could give me a solid answer. It'd make more sense to observe them in nature instead of killing them and praising them for how wonderful they are. Dose any one have an idea why? (link)
I really can't tell you why individuals would think one thing and preach another. In this case it probably has something to do with tradition and what someone else in the family taught them long ago about hunting and enjoying it.

That's why they can't answer you because they have never thought of it from any other perspective that what they are doing if only for sort isn't right.

I thin what you need to do is confront them again. Tell them that you cannot understand why they would call deer the most beautiful animals in PA. yet enjoy hunting them for sport and or eating them when in fact they don't need to. Tell them that's a conflicting message to send to a kid and expect them to figure out.

See what answer you get when you ask them to be brutally honest about why they choose to hunt these or any other animal and don't let them off with deflecting the question. Get your answer.

They probably have trouble justifying it to themselves and or have never thought about it. Make them think about it and explain your vegetarianism and what drives it. Hopefully, if you keep challenging them and pressing for a real answer you'll get one. They can't snow you.

any online websites that would help me a lot? (link)
I took a cursory look on Google (there are lots of links) and found a few things that may help that stood out immediately. The first is a book that you can download in PDF on Understanding Algebra by James W. Brennan. LINK:

If you head to type in Algebra II For Dummies by Mary Jane Sterling. It's $17 in paperback and $12 if you have a Kindle or Amazon's kindle app. If you aren't able to use Amazon any bookstore could have it or order it in.

Kumon also has workbooks through their site or Amazon on Algebra. If you can afford it getting their one on one tutoring may be a way to go or have your teacher find a tutor with you that really understands this stuff and can simplify it so you know it as well as anyone else.

I cheated on my husband cause i felt abanden lonely.not sexy but i met this guy and we use to talk.and made me felt wanted again but not.even a.week.later he asked to borrow money so i said k then.1 month later again and i said no. Then he tells me he had sex with his ex.and ask to borrow money again i told him no and he dont answer.his.calls no more is that all he.wanted to make me.feel loved and.wanted just to use me (link)
He preyed on your vulnerability and was only in it for sex and money. He knows you needed to feel loved so he acted as though he were providing that.

You're wise not to have anything else to do with him. He only wants to bleed you dry financially and use you. That's the truth unfortunately. He's pretty brazen with asking for money only after knowing someone 7 days.

I am seriously, seriously dreading October 15th as my older brother and his wife might be visiting. I seriously do not like this because each time they come down here, they end up using my room. I do not like this as they have a habit of going through my things and give me problems with what I own. Examples include my old action figures when I was a child which are stuffed in the closet and a Confederate Flag which I have hanging on my wall (I keep it mainly for my admiration for History). They also give me issues about something new each time they visit.

Sometimes it is something they just brought up or imagined. I say this because many years ago back when they visited in 2005, they had the nerve to accuse me of yelling at their only child when I do not recall such a thing and now I fear they might accuse me of something EVEN worse.

Lastly, I do not like being displaced because I feel a sense of inferiority considering I still live with my father. I also do not like this because I have no where to leave when my brother and his wife visit. I have tried to tell my family I do not like them using my room nor do I like them giving me problems. I want my room to be mine when they come. I am sick of being walked on by my family who does not respect how I feel when my brother and his wife come to visit.

How do I get them to listen where everyone wins and I keep what is mine?

Displaced and Frustrated. (link)
I don't know the layout of your home but I am willing to guess that your room is probably one of the only places they can go.

If it were not than I can't see them staying there otherwise. You need to ask your father to speak to them that you are upset over last time they stayed in your room.

Have him tell them that it was disrespectful to riffle through your personal belongings and make critical comments towards you about them or in general. And, he needs to develop a backbone and tell them that they treat you and everyone else in the house with respect or find a hotel.

You yourself can't come out and say that. However, you are well within your right to let them know that you're not putting up with their shit for another second if they start in. Let it roll off your back if you can as these people aren't worth it relatives or not.

You can tell your father that for those reasons and them being cruel towards you and accusatory that you would prefer them not to use your room and see what happens. Do it in a mature fashion and don't whine if he doesn't side with you due to space.

The other thing is if you think you have something in your room that they'll criticize you for find a way to move it to a file cabinet, or place you can lock it up and keep them from accessing.

If you knew your 27 year old brother was on cocaine and heroin and you felt that having him arrested was the only way to protect his life, would you do it?

If you, your parents, and your other siblings had tried everything, and I mean EVERYTHING short of getting him arrested and it all had failed to get him off of the drugs, what would you do? What if you had enough proof that he possesses drugs for the police to make the arrest? Would you actually call the police and have your own brother cuffed and thrown in jail?

He's already been arrested twice and sent to rehab twice and of he's arrested again he could be in big, BIG trouble. He might hate you if you do it and although your parents have talked about doing it themselves, everyone else might think you're a horrible brother. Still, you love home too much to let those consequences control your decision.

He actually overdosed once and almost died. His roommate had to call an ambulance and when they got there, your brother had stopped breathing and they had to shove a tube down his throat to force air into his lungs. You had to drive you parents to the hospital because upon hearing the news, they went into some kind of episode driven by the fear that their son was either dying or dead.

In addition to the fear you feel for your brother, your parents are living in agony because they're terrified for his life and you're worried that their stress and anxiety is damaging their health. You mom can't sleep well most nights and can't sleep at all some nights. She's constantly on the verge of having a coronary because of she can't live with the terror of her son dying from a drug overdose and your dad is always stressed out too. Your siblings live in agony as well and it'd just be better for everyone if your brother got off the drugs one way or another. What would you do? (link)
I would hand him the note you just wrote us and tell him this is where the rest of the family are at with his addiction. Stage an intervention with the family and try to get him back into treatment.

If he won't you have to get tough as a family and let him know that if he's on hard drugs or any drugs that you don't want to be involved with him anymore.

Your family needs to tell him that if he
pardon my word choice fucks up again and lands in jail that he could be behind bars for quite a while. The problem with addiction is that you can lead an addict to help but it's on them to take it and make it work.

It hasn't worked before. He needs something more aggressive with treatment but it's on him to stick with the program and get better. You have to try.

Are you a bad brother for wanting what is best for him no matter what? No. You aren't. You're all backed up against a wall here. Would I report him to a probation officer or tell the police what he has in his possession?

That's tough but if it's life and death and your parents are considering it as a last resort than as a family make the decision together not alone.

You can imagine if you or they do so that he's not going to be happy with whomever does perhaps for the rest of his or your lives but if it saves his.. A Catch 22.

Try as a family to get him to enter rehab again and that this is his last chance and that a probation officer or those who arrested him previously would have to be contacted in order to save his life. No clear-cut answer for this.

15/f. I've been feeling ill for the past couple days but it's gotten a lot worse. Please tell me what I have with my list of symptoms. I am a vegetarian and have been for 2 years and over muscle cramps and spasms in my legs from not eating properly. I have a pounding terrible headache. I am super nauseous whenever I move or lookaf anything and when I lay down, it feels like my bed is spinning. My throat is a bit sore. And my stomach is killing me. I feel like I need to throw up but when I got to the washroom, nothin happens and I just feel more nauseous. Please tell me what I have (link)
First things first we are not doctors and our advice should not ever take the place of medical advice from a professional. That is exactly what you are needing.

You need to consult an emergency room or doctor at first opportunity. Ask them about your headache, cramps, nausea and that everything around you feels like it's spinning. That certainly isn't normal and of concern.

Tell them you can't function. Any time you cannot fully function is when you need an ER visit. Better safe than sorry with treating it as an emergency. To reiterate NOBODY here can tell you what the doctor needs to diagnose.


Here is some of my education background:

I did a high school program where I was able to get two free years of college as a high school student. I graduated with my associates at the age of 18. My advisor shoved most of our college courses during our senior year of high school--I took 27 credit hours in one semester. I barely even graduated. My GPA was knocked down. The remaining two years, I transferred to a university and graduated with a bachelors degree in Psychology. My GPA was also low because I was mentally exhausted from the year before, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I just had a rough year and I struggled to keep my grades up.

The last year of my undergrad studies, I tried my best to pull my grades back up. Making B's one semester and finally A's and B's my last semester pulling my GPA up to a 3.6 that semester and a 3.0 for my overall GPA. I reached the requirements to apply for the graduate school of my choosing.

I want to go into graduate school for counseling but I'm afraid I won't get into it. I may have reached the requirement GPA but because it's not GREAT, they will determine it through my personal statement, my GRE score, and an interview. I am TERRIBLE at standardized tests. I never do well on them. I have been studying and I've been trying to be confident. My test date is a month away and even though the school I want to go to has no required score for the GRE. I want to do well. I want to get into the school.

I know that the explanation I have given are no excuses for my grades and my GPA.

Do you have any advice for me to not get too anxious? Any tricks and tips for the GRE or to get into graduate school? I've been stressing over it and I can't help but keep worrying. (link)
Pretend that high school doesn't exist at this point. Recruiters will only be interested in your B.A. in Psychology and the GPA out of university and grades which relate to what you need to study for the counselling program.

When you write your personal statement about why you should be a candidate for their program tell them that you were in a high school program where you were expected to do 27 high school credits in a year and earn an university degree.

Mention that you worked your behind off and that your GPA then and right after suffered because of a diagnosis of an anxiety disorder and depression but that you slugged it out and got A's and B's final semester.

If they see you are someone who will stick in there no matter what life throws at them when they interview you and in this statement than you'll have no problem. They can't not take a look at you based on this disclosure.

I'm Canadian so I don't know what a GRE is. However, if you don't require a score nor need to take it if I read correctly than why do it? If I misread and it is needed the best thing to do is study as much as you can and give it your all and don't worry about it. Let it unfold. If you stress you won't do well.

If you are meant to be a counsellor you will be eventually regardless of whether it's in their program or another university. I would also be looking at other schools too. a 3.0 GPA means you're an average student. It's not bad given what you have dealt with health wise.

I'm 14 almost 15 and my boyfriend wants to have sex this weekend it's his birthday. I feel that I'm ready but..people say we're to young and I'd never be able to admit it to my mom.. Any advise? (link)
WAIT! If you feel unsure than tell him you want to wait because you aren't ready. He should respect that. If he doesn't than that's his problem and he shouldn't be yours. You'll be fine but not feeling 100% means it's not time for you yet and that's okay. You'd regret it otherwise.

I just want to confirm something, we have hbo with our cable package - we can watch HBO channels and watch HBO moves On Demand. I recently discovered HBO Go where you can apparently stream HBO movies and tv shows but I'm a bit confused. Are we about to use HBO Go for free since we also have HBO in our cable package, or do we also have to pay extra to use the HBO Go services? Thank you! (link)
That's a question best directed to your cable or satellite provider. They can tell you whether or not its free or a pay service with the package you are subscribed to or not.

Does anyone know the height of ariana grande in 2014??? AS i want to follow her style and i'm a big fan thank youu (link)
5 ft 0 and 1/4 inches. That's what her agents have listed on her official bio on Internet Movie Database as current.

I feel scared to ask my parents for a snapchat facebook Kris even an instagram because of how over protective they are what should I do (link)
I would explain first of all what this account is and allows the account holder to do. Then see what they say.

As long as you are old enough by Facbook's policy to be on the site it should be okay. What I would do is give your parents the password to the account, list of friends and the opportunity to see what you are posting before you put it up for others to see.

Even if you set your account to post for a certain time and then automatically erase to my knowledge other people can take snapshots of what you put up or forward them to others without knowledge. As long as you are responsible and think about what should or shouldn't be posted and allow parents to monitor than it should be alright.

They may not see it that way so don't get annoyed. If they see you have a mature reaction in the future their stance on it could change.

I'm fifteen and a female. I met this guy like 5 days ago and recently he stopped talking and calling me. I called him today and it went straight to voicemail. Should I call him again or just leave him alone (link)
I already answered you. Hopefully, it's in your inbox folder.

My boyfriend's mom wasn't supposed to be home for another hour yesterday and she walked in on us having sex. She was so mad she couldn't talk at first and then she yelled at me to get out of her house and never come back and she watched me get dressed and didn't leave until I left. Obviously I deeply regret what we did and we shouldn't have been that stupid and I just don't know what to do now. I'm 18 and my boyfriend is 23. His mom is unpredictable and emotionally unstable and she said she wants to tell my parents about this. I am so humiliated and ashamed and I haven't decided if I should tell my mom yet i don't know if I can handle that right now. Should I? What am I supposed to do now? I can't apologize to his mom or talk to her at all because she hates me now but I want to do all I can to make this situation better. Please help me!!! (link)
By law at 18-years-old you are in most places in U.S. and Canada viewed as an adult. At 23-years-old your boyfriend is an adult.

Even if his mother isn't thrilled about this at your age you both have the right to choose to be sexually active and engage or not.

You didn't do anything wrong and did what was indeed a natural thing because you are in love with each other. That's a good thing.

I doubt the woman hates you but rather had a great "shock" she wasn't ready for and in the moment lashed out at you. Then again she may be super over-protective of him. In which case he has to make her aware of how important you are and that he's making sound choices and wouldn't be doing this with you if he weren't being cautious and wasn't committed.

What do you do? Well, rather than have his mother call yours which she probably won't tell your mother you have something that you're mortified over and embarrassed about and ask her advice on what to do and how to handle it especially if the woman is mentally unstable as you say.

One thing that may be a good idea if mom agrees is to invite his mother into your home to meet your family and see that you aren't a bad person at all and nor are your family for her and her son.

In the future if engaging in said activity make sure it's in a place where you can't be walked in on and promise that to everyone. I'm sure you won't be permanently banished or unable to see your boyfriend. It's likely anger and shock in the moment at seeing you both. Believe me a lot of people get walked in on so this isn't an uncommon thing.

I'm fifteen and a female. I met this guy like 5 days ago and recently he stopped talking and calling me. I called him today and it went straight to voicemail. Should I call him again or just leave him alone (link)
How often did you call him? That makes a difference. If all the calling was one-sided and made by you and he didn't call much he may have the wrong impression that you're needy.

Then again, the guy could be extremely busy with school, activities and other commitments that he hasn't been able to get back to people this week. It's not likely but it's possible.

The thing is maybe he was interested in you then but for whatever reason isn't any longer. Rather than doing the courtesy of telling you the truth and hurting you he could be hoping that not answering to your number will get you to move on.

What would I do? I wouldn't text, call or leave any messages. If he wants to get in contact he knows exactly how to find you. Let him come to you and initiate things from here on. In the meantime move on with life.

If he calls great if not that's okay too. You really didn't know each other outside of the one meeting. If you call again you'll definitely set the wrong impression permanently with him unfortunately. He needs to lead and or not from this point.

I've had suicidal thoughts for a large portion of my life but recently it's been getting worse. Due to recent events, I really hate myself and I can't shake this feeling of hopelessness.

I told my boyfriend this last night and he got really angry at me and called me a coward and pathetic. I get where he's coming from and I realise now that I can't kill myself because it's selfish and would hurt my mom. But now I can't stop feeling completely worthless and depressed.

How do I get rid of this feeling? I feel so alone, but I'm scared if I tell any of my other friends they'll react the same way and end up hating me.

Also, he said he was once depressed and his best friends started getting angry and shouting at him too and he got better. So now he's doing the same to me. Why isn't it working?

I'm also really confused because he said I need to look within myself and ask myself the hard questions in life. But I don't know what that means and he won't tell me. What do I do?

Also, should I try and get him to stop hating me and apologise to him? I feel like he's the only person I really trust to tell all this to but at the same time I don't know if he still cares..‚Äč

UPDATE: today I had a talk with him and he wanted to break up because I was a coward, emotionally unstable, weak and unreliable to him. He said I was holding him back from his career in comic books but he still loves me and that we should break up to make ourselves better people.

What does this all mean? And what should I do? (link)
You aren't a coward or any of things he stated about you. You have an illness in depression that you cannot control (yet) without proper medical treatment and counseling.

You may have loved this guy more than anyone at one time but I have to give you a reality check-- He's acting like an inconsiderate ass who doesn't give a damn for you. Worst of all his actions are showing this to be the truth. Someone who genuinely loves you would never do this.

Better off without him. Trust me, he's not acting like a real man as strong men do not behave this way with women they are with. They support them and most would find out everything they could to help their partner rather than putting them down.

He'll still be trying to make it in comic books or whatever else when you get this situation controlled and are excelling in life and all things. That's the reality. And believe me the issue isn't about his comic book art career desire. There's more to it and it's issues with him and not you.

The illness has made you see yourself as pathetic etc. which depression always does constantly 24/7 non-stop in one's inner thoughts if not treated correctly.

What you need to do is admit to yourself that "I have a serious problem here. I need to get my depression under control and I'm not functioning well especially if feeling suicidal."

Once you realize this go to any local ER. Tell them that you have depression, dark thoughts, and that you feel alone, lost and have been made to feel pathetic and cowardly. Be up front no matter what that have had thoughts of suicide. That's vital. Hide absolutely nothing and let all this information come out. You need to to gain control of this problem.

What happens is that the on-call psychiatrist assesses the situation and determines what counseling you need, medication etc. If he/she feels you need rest or could seriously harm yourself and or have delusions they can have you stay 72 hours for observation to figure out the right course of action.

I KNOW you don't like that idea but really all it amounts to is much needed rest where you don't have to focus on work or anything else rather than getting better. You can still see your family, watch TV, relax etc and go about some normal activities at the hospital. You should go home shortly after. All of what I'm saying from personal experience.

You have an illness and that's all it is you aren't crazy and will be okay. Ditching this guy may in fact be the best thing for you as you may find someone who loves you unconditionally and meets those standards.

Also, if people are angry with you over an illness you can't control and are saying the same things as he has been do yourself a huge favor and ditch those who you know aren't real friends. You don't need that because real friends would NEVER ever say these things or level blame.

It all comes down to them reacting and or acting out of total ignorance and fear of something that they themselves don't understand. It's far too easy to be ignorant in society than informed about mental health and how this affects people.

Anyone who gives you grief about it has a serious issue but it's not something for you to worry about as it's on them to wake-up.

If these people are important to you stand up to them with the truth about your illness and how hurt they make you feel with their erroneous views and ask them to either shut up and be out of the picture permanently or show some support already. For every 1 of them there are 10 people who will treat you better.

Hang in there. Once you learn your real self-worth through all of this there will be no limit to what you can enjoy in life or become or the quality friends either. You just have to take the first step to become well again. It will all fall into place. It does take time no lies there but the whole world can open to you once you address what is going on.

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