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I am so lonely. I can't get a boyfriend. I have been so broken lately. I don't know what to do to make a guy want to be with me. I have guy friends and i mean i am a unique person but i can't get a guy. i am not skinny but i am not too heavy. i am 15 and i probably weigh about 190 lbs. what do i do to make myself more attractive for guys to look at? are there any certain measures i should take such as loosing weight or changing my personality? please help...luv forever--->kelsey lou (link)
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Hey kelsey lou....You say you have guy friends so you must be doing something right!Don't start getting self consious about your appearence.Be yourself and don't worry the boys will soon start asking you out.
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hey im 16/f and i have been firends with this guy for like a year and half now and i have liked other guys but something just keeps pointing back to my friend. and we aare together all the time and do stuff as a couple...howcan i tell if he has the same feelings wihtout asking him or saying somthign becaus he is like awsomly shy!
please help! (link)
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Just keep doing stuff together and see what might happen.If a dance or something comes up ask him to be your date.The more time spent together the more he will loose his shyness with you.You won't find out how he feels unless you ask.The thing is you don't want to scare him off either.I'd give it some more time and just wait it out.
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So there are two boys that sit behind me in one of my classes, and ive noticed they've become very obsessed with me. They are always trying to get my attention, calling my name every 5 minutes, just making a bunch of annoying remarks. They even found out where i worked and showed up one time. Now they keep bugging me trying to figure out which days and hours i work. I avoided answering because im sick of them bugging me and showing up everywhere. As mean as it sounds, I dont want to have anything to do with them because they are just creepy to me. Im not very good at being honest about how i feel about people. So lately ive been ignoring them(after they yell my name about 4 times) and when they try to talk to me i just turn back around and dont say anything. Ive been doing this for weeks, hoping they'd get the hint that i DONT want to talk to them. But they dont get it! What am i supposed to do without being rude about it? (link)
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You're going to have to get rude because that is evidently all they understand.Tell them to stop following you and hasseling you or you will call the cops. They keep doing it because you are letting them. Follow up on the threat if they don't stop.You may first want to try to get help from your teacher and/or employer who may also be of help.
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Emo bands should die
We'll stuff their faces with pie
It'll get all over their ties
And we wont even cry
Am I the only one that feels this way? (link)
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probably not.
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Okay I am 21/f and I have this friend who used to be so funny. He would have me rolling all the time. So lately he is so not as funny as he used to be but he tries so hard to make me laugh that is actually quite pathetic. And I have been faking the laughs. He can't tell the differemce! He loves it when I am happy. How do I let him know that I love the laughs of the past but he needs to stop trying so hard without hurting his feelings.
Signed
Feeling like a bad person :-( (link)
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Who has changed him or you? Maybe you just don't see things the same as you used to.Unless something has happened to drastically change him I don't understand why his humor would have changed.Don't feel bad about it, change is USUALLY good! If you don't find something funny then say so.Don't pretend.Just tell him you don't find that kind of thing funny anymore if he expects a laugh where you don't feel like laughing.Don't fake laughs.There are other was of expressing happiness.
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I got a big problem with college. I hate it every day I go drains years out of my spirit. I would rather be working and living it up on the weekends. Instead I find myself here. It's not that I am bad at college I am actually quite good. I've made the dean's list twice. My problem is I don't like it and it doesn't feel like its my thing. I am here to make my parents proud my mother had to drop out of college to have my brother and she never went back. I am like allowing her to live vicariously through me and it is killing my spirit. I would be the third person in my family on either side to graduate college but I am terribly unhappy even thought I know how much this will help my future. Any suggestions? (link)
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You could take some time off and get a job.The thing you need to know up front is thst the majority of people never go back.Your mom may get pretty upset about it.The thing is that most jobs don't pay a whole lot and college COULD make the future pay better.A lot of that depends on what you're planning on doing.
You could changthings and only take a couple of classes per semester or take some evening classes.This will of course take you longer to graduate.You have invested a lot of time in it and two years isn't that long to wait really.Do what you feel you need to do.It's got to be your decision...Just some suggestions.
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We were friends from ninth grade till Eleventh grade. That's when I moved. I came back to visit sometimes. She moved in with her boyfriend. He didn't want me over there. He new about my shady past(messing with guys)She treated me diffferent. I started hanging out with my boyfriend more. She said I was ignoring her and that she felt used. She got pregnant (all of this our junior year in high school). She didn't tell me. She said nothing. So I stopped visiting for a while. She had her baby I came back once a year to see her. We drifted . two years go by and I call her up she's pregnant again and married that guy . I spoke to her several times in that period she never told me until then. Ispoke with her on Tuesday. So I decide to visit her on Saturday. She has moved to Virginia! From Louisiana. She never mentioned she was moving Tuesday. Was she ever really my best friend? I thought we were gonna be friends forever.
(link)
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Life goes on.....I'm sure she doesn't know all that has happened with you either.Unfortunatley all our lifelong friends made at school do not survive the real world.That is hard to explain to people who haven't been there. We tend to believe things will stay the same forever.But they don't. Your friend is now a wife and mother.Her life is totally different from yours, she has problems and struggles that you don't have yet.That kind of responsibility changes people.She can probably no longer relate to you and your life as a single girl.That doesn't mean that you still can't be friends.Your friendship will just have to move to another,more mature level.She should have told you she was moving but maybe she wasn't expecting you? Maybe it was a last minute thing? I don't know.Move on.
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ok heres the thing...i went out w/ this guy (we are both 13) and he broke up w/ me a week later because he said it felt akward because we were really good friends before that. ok so ever since then ive gone 3 places w/ him...the mall twice and the movies. ok at the mall the first time...he held my hand but we arent going out...ok at the movie he held my hand once then let go then put his arm round me and the held my hand again after that. ok and then tonight i went to the mall w/ him and some other guys and he held my hand again and started huggin me a lot but he tells everyone we are jus friends...does that make any sense? i mean he broke up w/ me and i didnt like him anymore but now i like him again because of all this but its gonna make me sad if he doesnt like me and i dont think he does but all mine and his friends say he does. how can i know why he keeps doing this?!?! sry its so long! ill rate good! thanx (link)
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He keeps doing this because you are friends.You can hang out with friends and not be dating them.Even if they are boys.Stop trying to read more into his every move and just be his friend.By the way, boy's are always confusing.They probably think girls are confusing too.Just talk with them and that part will usually get better.
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He's hurting so much. My fiancee. He learned last September that the father he never met died three years earlier. We were only engaged for two months when he learned this. He is so distant now I can't even reach him on this subject. He doesn't talk about it. He is so different now. I ask him. he doesn't say. It is so strange now. We went from sharing everything to sharing some things. It's killing him and it's killing me. I don't want to be selfish but I need to be the one he turns to. He hasn't talked to anyone he says. Do I need to just back off or should I pursue him. I need to get him back to good.Please help.21/f (link)
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I wouldn't jump to marry this guy until he gets his head together.He needs to talk to someone.I'm sure this was a blow to him.He may have always thought that he would one day meet and get to know his father. Now of course that option has been taken away.He needs to talk to his mom and find out everything he can about him.It must mean a lot to him to know about the guy. He shouldn't feel guilty about not getting to know his dad. Dad was the grown up and never made the move to know him.I'm sure there are lots of things going on in his head about it.He needs to get over it though and get on with your life together. It has been long enough that he should probably seek professional advice to help him sort out his feelings.Until then I would hold off on getting married.
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Ok, so I'm 18, f and I live in the boarding school in India. There's a guy in my class who I've knon for about a year now, he was my cousin's friend before I joined this school and now he's my class mate. I joined school in August 2004 and Ihad been mailing and chatting with him since May 2004. On the net he was the sweetest guy ever, and he was there for me when I needed him and he made me laugh and he was an amazing guy, and I fell in love with him, with who he was online. But then when I finally got to school hewould ignore me and just say hi/bye whereas just a month ago we were practically best friends. Nevertheless, my heart refused to forget the guy he was online and I fell even deeper in love with him. And so, I did somethings which ended up in me making a fool of myself and getting very hurt and him finding out. School broke upin December and when I logged back online, there he was, the guy I originally fell in love with. ANd it was just as if nothing had happened in between and we sort of picked it up in between, but this time, before going bacl to school I told him that I had stopped liking him and I had a bf, which was not true. But because of this lie, our relationship at school has become considerably better and we talk occaisonally now. The thing is, he likes this other girl who doesn't like him back and it kills me to see them together (they're friends) and I hate it, I just want to know if there's anything I can do to get him, I'm crazy about him!!!! (link)
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Lots of people just find it easier to write than to talk.Thats probably why he seems two different people.Why don't you try being friends with this other girl? You can't pick another persons friends but maybe you can give her a chance. She might be nice. Since you told him you had a boyfriend you can't blame him for trying to find a girlfriend.If you want to have a chance with him you'll have to come clean and tell him you are unattached.See where it goes from there.
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i think my best friend is either bulemic or anorexic. she weighs about 119 pounds, wears a size 0 jeans and she constantly goes on about how shes fat. SHE IS NOT AT ALL. she graphs her weight on a chart (i saw it) and it's REALLY starting to scare me. what should i do? talk to somebody about it, talk to her...? please help!! (link)
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If you really think she has a problem I would say something to someone. Her mom if you know her well enough.Just ask her if she thinks maybe friend has a problem with this because you noticed that and you don't want to get her in trouble but your're worried. Be prepared for her to get mad at you for awhile.You could talk to her but she will probably deny it.If you do and she tells you that she is...definatley tell someone.
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my friend, let's call her "emily," is very opinionated. most of the time it's rude and she's not afraid to voice her opinion, especially to me. now at first i didn't mind this, but now it's getting really annoying. see, last night was the sports awards banquet at my school and she kept making rude comments to me about people she didn't like but were my friends. if she didn't like them, she would be like, they don't deserve this award because of blah blah blah and i just wanted to scream at her because they deserve it so much and she just says that because she's jealous (she used to be good, but not anymore). how can i get her to stop being so rude and obnoxious? i really don't want to hear this constant complaining anymore. i'm not very confronational so i don't think talking to her in private would be my best option. thanks so much! (link)
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You really need to say something.Don't let people walk all over you or they will.I don't think you'll get her to change because obnoxious people rarely do! Just tell her that while she may not like these other people they are your friends and you would like her to keep her comments about them to herself.If she doesn't then move away from her. Maybe you can embarrass her into behaving. I know you're not confrontational but if you don't say anything she will assume you like her behaviour.Sorry.
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SORRY THIS IS LONG..ILL GIVE A 5 TO ANYBODY WHO ANSWERS THIS!! THANX!!
me and my friend have been best friends since 8th grade...were now in 12th grade and as the school year is coming to an end and were going to be graduating i feel like now is the chance that we need to hang out and reminice on our inside jokes and everything. the problem is..she has a fiance..she is 18 yrs old n has only been going out with this kid for 4 months... they spend every minute of there lives together and its like there is no need for me anymore. Well i've talked to her about this so many times i've decided to just give up. So i started to just hang out with my other friends. Well all of a sudden she said to me "it feels like were not friends anymore" and i said well why do you feel like that and she said " because we dont talk alot n stuff". Well the thing is everything i try n talk to her she just says oh were still friends and goes on her way. Everytime i try and hang out with her it's either oh im doing something with Russ tonight (thats her fiancee) or its well u can hang out with us if u want. I dont want to be the third wheel..yes i have a boyfriend but she doesn't like him so what am i supposed to do about that? im trying to please everyone but its not working. And when i try to just hang out with her and just me and her its like her fiancee gets all mad at me and everything. I really don't know what to do!!! can someone please help!!? (link)
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You need to tell her this. You will soon be graduating.She will be getting married soon.Once people get out of high school they usually go thier seperate ways and don't see each other a whole lot.So maybe she could take the time to give you at least one night of just you girls for old times sake.Soon you won't have the time.I hope all works out well.
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My friend just told me that my other two friends were knocked down by a car earlier today. One of them is one of my best friends, my friend says she didn't get badly hurt but I'm still worried. Her mobile phone is switched off and no one is answering her home phone. I'm quite worried, I want to check that she is definitely okay but I can't get hold of her. What should I do? (link)
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If you know what hospital she went to call the emergency department and see if a relative is there that you can talk to.The nurses PROBABLY won't give you any info themselves but can let you talk with a parent or someone who will.If she has been admitted to the hospital they can give you her room number.Either her or a family member will answer and can tell you what is happening.Hope all is well.
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hey,
I have this problem with a guy named Matthew. We have been best friends for over 4 years. Recently we both fell in love with each other. I least I love him. He always wants to mess around and he says it means something. To me it really does. He claims he wants to loose his virginity to me and claims that that would bring us together. Would that actually bring u apart? Help! (link)
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Rule number one is that boys will say ANYTHING that will get them what they want.even the nice ones.Keep this in mind at all times.Being friends bring people closer together more than anything else.Don't be pressured to do something you don't feel comfortable doing.If he truly loves you he will wait until you're ready.If you decide to go along, remember to use protection.
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I have a friend (lets call her gina) and she'll be my friend for one minute and egt mad at me for nothing the next. and im really getting tired of it. its getting old and she's kinda popular and hangs out with a lot of my friends but if i get mad at her, she gets other people involved in hating me and if shes mad at me, so are they. what should i do. P.S, I rate 5's
-Brittany (link)
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I guess you could just ignore her for awhile. When she starts asking why let her know in no uncertain terms that you are tired of her treating you nice one minute and being a raving mad woman the next. Don't yell or get in her face just state the facts.If she wants to treat you that way you can get along without her.Tell some of the others what is going on beforehand and beat her to the punch.
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Me and this girl have been friends for like ever (well since like elementary school) anyways, we botth have made more friends, and we share alot of the same friends. anyways my real problem is that i feel that she would rater hang out with them than me. she invites them over like all the time. she hasnt invited me over since like the summer. i know this probablymakes me sound jelouse and selfish, but i just wish she would spend more time with me. what should i do. i dont want to tell her that i feel left out, cuz i iwll feel stupid. i reallyneed help please (link)
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She isn't going to know unless you say something.You have to communicate.Not all your friends have to be friends with each other.Let her know you realize that but you would really like to hang out more often.Could be she doesn't realize.
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Hi. My problem is a long long story. It starts like this. Me and my punkish/gothy friends have been together since like…4th and even earlier. This year I’m a freshman in high school and I’ve started hanging out with new people. Preppy but they’re not that preppy. They like emo and rock and accept everything. I don’t even want to call them preppy…They’re very popular and just normal. Amanda has become my new best friend and she in the normal group. My old best friend alix has drifted away from me and so had the whole punky group. They even stopped inviting me to hang places with them…I am pretty social and I need people so I made new friends still being friends just not best friends with my old friends. I’m talking to Alix one day on my way to lunch and it’s fine and then she says she has to go to her locker and I say I don’t feel like it and then another old friend of mine (Michelle) says why don’t you go hang out with your other friends like Amanda and them all. And then Alix says Amanda’s a snobby bitchy skank. I swear Amanda must be the nicest person in the world. She has nun potential. She’s really nice and does everything for me and sometimes I feel like a leech but Amanda says it’s fine. She is definitely not a bitch and I am sure of it because I asked many many people about what they think of her and the first thing they said was she’s nice. So that makes the bitch part wrong. As for skank? Amanda doesn’t date much…I don’t remember her ever having a boyfriend. She has crushes but she gets shy around them…So I don’t know where the skank came from…The snobby part? Well her parents do have money but it’s not like she acts or dresses like a rich snob. I told Alix that she shouldn’t say that because she doesn’t know her. And Alix said that if shes a skank she doesn’t want to get to know her. I told her I really don’t appreciate her saying that and then I left..So I told Amanda and my new friends what Alix said about her. Sara (emoish cheerleader and also very nice friend of mine) said that if Amanda’s a bitch then Sara must be like Satan or something. I’ve been friends with Sara since elementary school. None of my old friends believe me because I JUST started hanging out with her a lot again now. Back in like 3rd grade we were partners for a field trip to a water park. Well I could tell that Amanda was upset but shes acted careless and had to tell me not to worry. And a good point is that none of my new friends said anything bad back about her. I really like these new people. They have a good influence on me. I don’t want to tell anyone but Alix is a bigger bitch skank and snob then Amanda. Saying that stuff about Amanda was bitchy. Alix has let random guys give her hickeys and done other stuff too….I don’t think she realized that when she called Amanda a skank. Alix’s mom also has money….As a matter of fact Alix gets just about everything she wants. She gets a new cell phone every once in a while. Amanda doesn’t even have one right now….My new friends are also smart. They’re in all the honors classes with me and doing well….I like being on the same level with people instead of being with my old friends who give “me damn your smart”. Alix is in my honors English and global class but shes not doing well at all….My new friends are the ones my mom always wanted me to have…So now Alix is mad at me…She didn’t even really notice me before….And I don’t know what to do because I don’t want to completely abandon my old friends for my new friends because we have been friends for so long and we used to be so close…But they won’t accept me being with new people no matter what…I know it has to do with typical high school stereotype but no one really wants to admit it…And it would take me all through high school to establish and entirely new group of friends as big as the old one….I cried over this once but it’s really stupid how my old friends are acting and I don’t know what to do…Since this was really long and you might have gotten confused leave a message if you have any questions. Please Please help me!
Love,
Cup of orange juice
(picked a random object in my room) (link)
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You are just growing up and people change.Most likely your old friends will change one day to.Until then I would say to hang around with the newer group of kids most often. If alix is mad at you and won't hang around with you anymore that is her problem.It sounds like she's probably jealous.I might add that if mom likes the newer crowd she will probably be more comfortable letting you go out and do things with them.She may have some doubts about the other crowd. All you can do is be nice to them all.Your true friends will stick by you.And when the old friends start bad mouthing the new ones, don't even contribute to it by listening.Just move on.
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15 f, i have a big group of friends..but they are all guys. we always go to parties together and a lot of them always try to hook up with me i recently broke up with my long term boyfriend and JASON CODY and TERRY asked me out. im worried that if i go out with any of the guys in my group the rest will get cut at me and ditch me.. i really like CODY.. not only is he the youngest in the group (16) but hes the shortest and im the tallest girl in school(5'11)... They are all fighting about it.. i dont know what to do i really like CODY but we look stupid together, it will cause a lot of trouble and i could end up with no friends.. what should i do? (link)
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your young! Go out with them all one time and then go out again with any of them you really liked. Who cares if your taller than Cody? Girls mature faster, he'll catch up soon. You were all friends when you had the long term guy weren't you? I don't think they will stop being your friends. A couple of them might have hurt feelings for awhile but they'll get over it.Since you all go out together a lot of the time you'll still be all together.Just have fun and don't be shallow and worry about appearences,they don't matter at all.
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ok heres how it goes this girl that hates me because someone else hates me has come back from the roc a place for trouble makers and one of my friends is her friend well anyway she came back and my other friend hangs out with her nonstop and i dont wanna talk to her while that one girl is around cuz she hates me. so ii call my friend up and tell her how i feel but she doesnt even really seem to notice shes just happy that shes back and im happy for her but like now i have no one really to hang out with cuz they all hang out with that one girl you get what im saying? (link)
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If she is treating you like a nobody now, go find a new friend. A real friend wouldn't treat you like that. You deserve better.She will realize that life will go on for you without her around and I wouldn't be surprised if she came crawling back.
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