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what do i do when my house is haunted (link)
You should exhaust all possible rational explanations before you consider haunting to be a possibility - and then dismiss that too, because it's NOT possible. The most common "manifestations of haunting" are noises, chills, and apparitions, all of which are easily explained by perfectly normal phenomena.

(1) All houses make noises. My own house makes loud popping noises up in the rafters every single morning. I worked out eventually that it always happens about five minutes after the sun comes up - the most likely explanation is that the sun is warming the roof and causing the wood to expand slightly - and every night it cools back down, resetting it for the next morning.

(2) Drafts are likewise to be found in all houses, particularly older ones. A tiny crack can let air in, and all houses have vents to the outside - if they didn't, then the air quality inside would become intolerable. (Speaking of which, the previous responder is right about carbon monoxide - get yourself some detectors if you don't already have them.) The point is that a random chill in the air is just a bit a breeze that made it inside.

(3) If you're seeing things, then it is likely your mind interpreting faces and figures in the shapes of things around you. Our brains are geared to look for faces; we see them even when only the slightest suggestion of a face is there. If you're seeing lights or vague forms drifting through the air, they could be anything from unexpected reflections to random phosphene bursts in your own retinas.

There has never, EVER been one single verified case of a genuine haunting of a house. Not ONE. There are lots of shows on TV about ghost-chasers and whatnot, but they are after RATINGS, not facts. They don't even know what they're looking for; they have equipment which measures ambient temperature and electromagnetic field fluctuations, both of which have a hundred perfectly natural and normal causes - and why would they think that ghosts cause these things anyway? No one has ever actually studied a bona-fide ghost before! It's all sheer speculation and pseudoscience.

Your house is not haunted. Don't look for ghosts; the only ones you find will be the product of your own imagination. If there are strange things happening in your house, look for natural causes instead of supernatural ones.



My wife and I have been married for 20+ years. We are both in our mid-40's and have two teenage boys. Both my wife and I were in multiple failed relationships before we met. So, we both had other sexual partners before our marriage. Since our marriage, I can't speak for my wife, but I believe our relationship has been monogamous; at least I have been monogamous. My wife even after kids, still has the figure of a 20 year old. I am still in good shape only 15 pounds heavier than when we married, but I am not chiseled anymore and have a slight muffin top form with a receding hairline. I think that our sex life is great! We still go at it like rabbits 4 sometimes 5 nights a week. Although, I must admit that I am not the man I was 20 years ago. I used to be able to maintain an erection all night and hammer away at the wife time and time again. The past 10 years or so it seems that after the first shot, I am ready to go to sleep; one and done. Even those little blue pills don't seem to help. Recently, my wife tells me that I don't satisfy her sexually anymore. My wife tells me that she still loves me. She claims that her love for me will never change since she has 2 kids and 20 years invested in me. But, my wife says she wants to sleep with other men. Not only that, but black men as well. My wife tells me that she dreams of screwing a black guy at work. She tells me that her girlfriend at work, another married woman has had an affair with this same black guy. Her girlfriend's husband knows nothing about the affair which my wife thinks is absolutely wrong! She says it is one thing to sleep with other men with your husband's approval and just plain down right dirty to sneak around behind your spouse's back. Her girlfriend tells her that this black guy has a 13 or 14 inch cock and thick as her arm. Now, I am fairly well endowed; I am about 10 or 11 inches and pretty thick but I am not quite as big as him. Although it has been more that 20 years since I had another woman, I don't ever remember a woman complaining about my cock. If they said anything at all about my cock, they said it was the biggest they ever had! My wife soaked her panties last night telling me about this black guy's huge cock. It made for some damn good sex while she was telling me about him, but afterwards it made me feel puny. I am worried. Is it lust?, infatuation?, or am I losing her? I told her I would have to think about it. I must confess that I feel like a pervert, but I have been checking my wife's panties in the laundry for some time now and have not found any unusually soiled panties. Therefore, I don't think that she has cheated. At least not yet. But I am afraid that if I say "NO", she will cheat. Her cheating girlfriend wants her to do a 3some. For your information; I am not a cuckold and have no desire to be dominated or submissive in my marriage. To me marriage is a shared responsibility and the husband and wife are equal partners. Personally, I have no desire to be with another woman, but I wonder what she would say if I had asked her for permission first? What do you think I should do? (link)
I think that you must make it clear that you married her with the expectation that you would have a monogamous sexual relationship, and that you expect her to hold to that. When one gets married, it comes with certain sacrifices. That's usually one of them.

You have every right to say "NO". First of all, you are having sex four to five times a week, and that's way above average for a 20+ year marriage. And if you can't hammer on all night like John Henry anymore... well, that happens! It is totally unreasonable for your wife to expect you to maintain the libido and the stamina of an 18-year-old throughout your entire life!

Second, you are directly concerned with who your wife has sex with, because there are diseases out there and she would be putting you at risk if she had sex outside the marriage. Furthermore, there is the possibility that she may become pregnant; what exactly does she plan to do in that case?

Third, the two of you have a shared sex life. I imagine that your desires are usually compatible; I don't see how it could be this successful after so long otherwise. Sometimes, you may ask her to go outside her comfort zone for something you like, and vice-versa. Neither of you, however, has any business DEMANDING that the other agree to something they're not comfortable with, and to make that a condition of staying married is the worst kind of emotional blackmail.

I think that what's going on here is that the two of you have had a great sex life for many years (congratulations, I wish I could say the same) and likely have done so in part because you are honest with each other about your wants and desires. She is telling you about something she fantasizes about. It doesn't mean that she gets to do it! I've fantasized about having sex with two women at once, and my wife knows this, but I sure as hell don't expect her to do it for me because I know it's way outside her comfort zone. Disappointing? A little, sure. But it's worth it to me to give up any chance of ever fulfilling that little fantasy so that I may have the reality of being with her.

You should tell your wife in no uncertain terms that this is not something you're comfortable with, nor are you ever likely to be. Don't give her any false hope that you might come around - you know that this is not something you want to have happen, and if it does, it'll be the beginning of the end. You are not being unreasonable. She is your wife, and she owes you a certain degree of respect and commitment (this goes both ways, of course; I agree with you 100% that the best marriage is an equal partnership). She also owes it to you to leave certain sexual fantasies unfulfilled if you're not comfortable with them.

And she needs to learn to be satisfied with sex 4 to 5 times per week. Frankly, she should consider herself fortunate that she's getting it four to five times per month. Most couples at your age are not so lucky.


Hiii
I am not sure if I am a virgin or not? I m not sure if my hymen is broken or not? When I was in gr 10 I iinserted a tempon jus the tip of it den I toook it out coz I was scared I don't remeber bleeding after it but I m not sure if my hymen is broken n I have never had sex can I. Stilll bleeed during the 1st time I have seXx? This hymen thing is very important in my culture so plz I neeed help wat to doo:(? (link)
It's unlikely that you could have broken your hymen with your tentative exploration. You would have noticed some pain even if you don't remember any blood.

One tries not to judge other cultures too harshly, but I find I must say this: If the man you have sex with for the first time is more concerned about looking for physical evidence of your virginity than he is about the fact that you are offering him the gift of being sexually intimate with you for the first time, then he has his priorities messed up. And since a hymen can be broken in dozens of ways besides having sex, it really shouldn't be held up as the standard of virginity. If you haven't had sex yet, you're a virgin; the state of your hymen should be irrelevant.


Male,27
I have a little problem down there. It kinda smells all the time and I don't know how to solve it. Even when I have a shower like three times a day,this disgusting smell continues to be there. What can I do to get rid of it? Thanks and Sorry,since I know this is not so nice to read. (link)
There may be some abnormality in your sweat which is causing a disagreeable odor. It is also possible that you have a urinary tract infection. Either way, the solution is to see a doctor; both conditions can be treated easily enough.


I’m fed up with poor service, must unlock my BlackBerry Bold 2, can anybody assist ?
(link)
So, you need to unlock a Motorola MB525m an HTC G2, and a Blackberry Bold 2, because you're getting poor service on all three devices.

I don't think so. What happened is that you stole three phones and want to unlock them so you can get at all the information on them.

Nice try.


I need to unlock my HTC G2, can anybody help ? (link)
So, you need to unlock a Motorola MB525m an HTC G2, and a Blackberry Bold 2, because you're getting poor service on all three devices.

I don't think so. What happened is that you stole three phones and want to unlock them so you can get at all the information on them.

Nice try.


I’m fed up with poor service, must unlock my Motorola MB525, any help appreciated ? (link)
So, you need to unlock a Motorola MB525m an HTC G2, and a Blackberry Bold 2, because you're getting poor service on all three devices.

I don't think so. What happened is that you stole three phones and want to unlock them so you can get at all the information on them.

Nice try.


Hiii my boobs hurt when I wake up but when I wear a bra it doesn't actually hurt that much? (link)
My wife has been pregnant twice, and both times her breasts grew considerably, as one would expect. When they were larger (and more tender), she found it more comfortable to sleep with a bra on than not. When they went back to their normal size, she preferred not to have one on.

Even if you do not have larger-than-average breasts, they may simply be unusually sensitive. You don't mention your age, but if you're in your teen years, they're probably just still growing and reacting to new levels of hormones; if that's the case, they won't be this sensitive forever.

Your solution is simple enough - just wear a bra to bed. Get a few which are as comfortable as possible without regard to how they look.


20/f Its like this - I'm a a 20 years old, and i have nothing to show for it. I don't have any work history, the only completed schooling that I have is a high school diploma, but that's it. It's hard to find a job, I mean well I'm not a people person, so even thinking of being a cashier, waitress, etc. makes my skin crawl, and no its, not that i hate people, its what i think they will think of me. I rarely go outside, and most of the time when i do do its night time. Sometimes its a struggle for me just to get out of the bed, my old doctor prescribed me zoloft, i informed that it wasn't working, he just up the dosage to 75mg (which is still not working), i know I'm diagnosed with depression, but he never informed on what type. Sometimes I cry myself to sleep at night, sometimes i feel very agitated. i feel like a FAILURE. I want to do more with my life, i WANT to successful, but its like i can't. I've been out of school going on 3 years and i haven't accomplished anything, all of my friends are in college or working or both, living their lives, and im doing nothing. Walking to the post office from my house which is like 500 feet away seems like a journey. I barely even talk to any of my friends anymore, i barely talk to anyone anymore, I feel like I've slowly fallen off the face of the earth and no one cares. i really want to go to job corps (trade school) but its almost like college, where you go and live on campus, and im almost terrified to go because of all the people, i keep trying to tell myself it could be good, but idk i just feel scared. does anyone else have a problem similar to this or knows anyone who does? any thoughts acnd comments will be helpful. thank you in advance (link)
The responder below has some good points. I would like to add to them, if I may.

You should definitely ask your doctor if you can try another medication. Antidepressants will work differently on different people; sometimes it takes a couple of tries to get it right. If he won't prescribe something else, see another doctor.

There are jobs available for those who do not fall into the category of "people person". Naturally, the most visible jobs are the ones where one DOES interact with people, and almost every job requires you to do so in some way, but there are some where your interaction is more limited.

In order to get a good job which you can potentially enjoy, though, you'll need some skills. Job Corps may be a good place to get them. There are also other ways; you can take online classes, for instance. But I think that Job Corps would be helpful in a number of ways, not the least of which would be the very thing that scares you: it would be a complete change of scene, and you'd be surrounded by new people. In other words, it is a fresh start, and it seems like you could use one.

One way to look at it is this: what do you have to lose? At the moment, you're not really going anywhere. This really is a case where all you have to fear is fear itself. There is one thing you might be able to do to make it easier - you don't mention whether the on-campus living situation would require you to have a roommate, but if it does, you may be able to arrange for an exception to that. In this way, you'll have a place you can retreat to which is entirely yours if you feel the need for it.


I used to talk to a guy about 3 years ago and we met through a mutual friend who is also my best friend. We never did more than hug and we ended it not long after we met but we have stayed in touch on and off for the past 3 years. Over the past 6 months we have started to become closer and hangout all the time. It's clear that he likes me...he invited me to his parents house for Christmas dinner, he flirts with me a lot when we hangout, he has asked me more than once to transfer colleges back to my hometown where he lives, and recently he put his hand on my leg in the car it felt so good to feel him touch me this way but I knew it was wrong so I pushed his hand away. I want to be with him so bad but he has a girlfriend and they've been together for a while and I refuse to become "the other girl" and to cheat on his girlfriend. I need advice on what to do about this situation...should I tell him? (link)
Yes, you should tell him. Because if you do not, you may be setting yourself up for a lifetime of regret, wondering for years to come what might have been.

You don't have to be "the other girl", nor should you be. He has a Girlfriend, not a wife. And it is not wrong to express feelings to a guy who has a girlfriend; it's only wrong to pursue a secret relationship with him behind her back. If he chooses to break up with her and be with you instead, that sucks for her, but there is nothing dishonest or morally wrong with it.

The ONLY reason why you might not want to tell him is if he's made it clear that he does not return any such feelings, and you know it would be futile - but that doesn't seem to be the case here. It seems like he may be interested in you as well. From what you describe, it's impossible to know if he's any more than "interested".

I think that perhaps he DOES feel something more than friendship for you, and that he's been "testing the waters", so to speak. He wants to see how you react to a little flirtation or an intimate touch. He wants to know if there's a reason why he should break up with his girlfriend. Please bear in mind that I might be completely wrong about this, but the signs are there.

I suggest you get him alone sometime and tell him exactly how you feel. If he doesn't feel the same way, you may have your heart broken; that's the risk you must take. But there is no reward without risk, especially when it comes to love. And in the end, even heartbreak is better than regret.

Best of luck to you!


I don't know what's happening to me... It takes me forever to go to sleep nowadays. I'll just lie in bed at night for hours, thinking about him, his smile, thinking back on great memories we've shared, picturing him and I napping in the shade with my head on his chest, imagine us slow dancing, imagining him kissing me, etc. I keep listening to love songs, daydreaming, grinning. There's this constant swelling feeling in my chest, it's kinda weird, but I don't really mind it. When I daydream about him, the swelling feeling is almost overwhelming. He's the first thing that pops into my head when I wake up in the morning, and the thing depriving me of sleep at night. It's driving me insane! Are these things common? More importantly, am I crazy? I don't wanna be a crazy-stalker-lady. Please halp! ;A; (link)
You are infatuated. It's not quite the same as being in love, but it can be the first step.

One of the big things that makes the difference is how well you really know him. If you've mostly admired from afar and don't actually know him as a person all that well, then it's simple infatuation. If you DO know him well - if you talk to him, spend time with him, understand him, and still feel this way - then you are most likely in love.

Another way to tell if you're in love: Do you see him as perfect, ideal, everything you've ever wanted in a crazy good-looking package, suitable for carving in marble? Or, do you know that he has flaws, but somehow they don't really matter? Again, this is something that comes from knowing him better.

One thing to keep in mind, if you wish to pursue a possible relationship with him (which is something that you should by all means do, unless there's some overriding reason not to!) - be careful not to put him on too high a pedestal, because that's the surest way to ensure he always remains out of reach.


I don't wish to stir up a lot of controversy but rather to get info and opinion on circumcision. My friend just had a baby and wasn't sure whether to have this procedure performed. She's asking male friends their view.

She doesn't nor do I like the idea of inflicting pain on a child. I've read this operation takes 10-20 minutes and is hard on the infant. However, I've also read that an intact foreskin is hard to clean for a child, there can be cheesy discharge that hardens under the head and that the foreskin can crack or tighten as an adult needing the procedure. I don't know if any of this talk of preventing STDs, AIDS or cancer is true either.

I'm just hoping I can go back to my friend with a better idea of what I feel about it after hearing from people hear especially parents who did and didn't have it done and whether they would do it again based on what their experience was. (link)
There is absolutely no medical reason to perform a circumcision on a healthy newborn with a normally formed penis. There are rare circumstances where it is medically necessary, but you would have been told about it if it was.

Yes, some extra steps need to be taken to keep the area under the foreskin clean, but it really is very simple to do. There can be a discharge, but this is avoidable if the area is kept clean. It is possible for an adult to develop a condition which will necessitate circumcision later in life, but this is rare. In the end, circumcision on an infant is performed overwhelmingly for religious reasons, and any medical reasons for it which are trotted out are very weak arguments indeed, used only by the people doing it for religious reasons so that they can justify it. The bottom line is that it's cosmetic surgery done without the infant's consent.

My son is uncircumcised. He is now two years old and has no problems whatsoever with hygiene or anything else. He's never had an infection in or around the penis. If he decides to get circumcised when he becomes an adult, that will be his choice.

I, on the other hand, am circumcised, and I would rather I hadn't been. I'm reasonably sure that it was painful at the time, though of course I have no memory of it.

It boils down to this: before undergoing surgery or having it done on someone in your care, the question one should ask is, "Why is it necessary?" In my opinion, and that of the majority of doctors not blinded by their own religion, the available reasons for routine infant circumcision don't come close to justifying it.


Hey everyone! Im an eight grade boy who goes to school in oregon. So i had a really good friend ( a girl ) who i liked. Ok, well not liked, loved i guess. All i thought about was her. I dreamed about her. I thought about having a future with her. I loved this girl. Everything about her. Her smile, her love for animals, she was pretty smoking hot too. So anyways, she got a boyfriend (which crushed me) and i noticed they moved rather fast. He was touching her butt after one week. So since she had started to date this guy, our friendship became foggier and foggier. I asked her why she had not been talking to me, and somehow she ended up tellimg me that she had been doing stuff she wasnt proud of. Things like cutting herself and being anerexic. Once she had told me this, my heart just completely flopped. I told her that she was perfect and beautiful just the way she was and i told her i loved her (i was not lying)and she told me not to tell anyone. Now, a little sidenote, her boyfriend and i were bros, and i couldnt handle all of the pressure inside of me, i ended up telling her boyfriend, and he cared as well. She stopped talking to me and removed me on facebook, and blocked my phone. I love this girl and i cant just sit here and watch her deteriorate, as well as completely rip me out of her life. Since then, i have been extremely suicidal (attempted suicide 7 times) and i still love her. Somehow i need closure with her. She wont acknowlage my existance at school, and she told me that if i got hit by a train, it would be the happiest day of her life. I love this girl beyond measure and i dont know what to do. (link)
You have to move on. She wants nothing more to do with you. Whether that's the right call or not, whether it's fair or not, whether you like it or not, she has made the decision and she has made it very, very clear that the decision is final. I suspect that she's very upset that she told you something in confidence and you told her boyfriend all about it. That's not a "little sidenote" - that's a serious breach of trust. While there are some times when one must put a friend's welfare ahead of their confidence, you really should have told her parents or a school counselor. Instead, you told her boyfriend because you "couldn't handle all the pressure" (your words). You weren't thinking of her feelings or her well-being; you were thinking of your own. As soon as you understand that, you'll know why she's so angry with you and why she's not going to just get over it.

It is unfortunate that she has made some poor choices and that she is deteriorating, but there is NOTHING you can do about it. Any good advice you give her will be ignored. If you try to force yourself on her, you will only make things worse. She may even feel compelled to accuse you of harassing her, which could result in your expulsion from the school.

You also need to stop attempting suicide. That will help no one, least of all yourself, and it certainly won't do her any good. I can't help but think that you're doing as a desperate attempt to get a reaction from her - forgive me for being blunt, but if you really meant to kill yourself, you would have succeeded by now. What you are really doing is continuing the pattern of putting own feelings ahead of anyone else's. You're thinking about ending your pain at the price of causing pain for all those who care about you.

The only way you can ever have any future relationship with this girl, whether as friends or anything else, is to give up now. That may seem nonsensical, but the fact is that she is seven shades of pissed off at you and she'll be that way for the foreseeable future, especially if you keep bothering her and giving her reasons to stay angry. Don't look for "closure" - you won't get it, and besides it's just another way of putting your feelings ahead of hers once again. Instead, just back away. Stop trying to communicate with her in any way, even to the point of ignoring her just as she does with you. Don't even try to apologize; she doesn't want to hear it. The ONLY way you will ever get back into her good graces is if she makes the first move. The odds are that will never happen, so don't hold onto too much hope, but it's the only chance you have. And as small as that chance is, you'll make it smaller every time you try to make it happen before she's ready to forgive.

One more thing... the girl you fell in love with no longer exists. She may not have ever really existed in the first place. That glowing, perfect, idealized version of her lives only in your mind. I know what I'm talking about here; I've been there and done that. I can say from experience that the best way to see to it that someone remains forever out of your reach is to put them on a pedestal.



my sister who is 22 went to jail for a year for fraud related charges. If I commit the same crime what is the likelihood I will be sent to the same place? I don't want her to be all alone in there. I am 18 year old and female as well. Also, it is a non violent crime and only a year so it doesn't seem too bad (link)
While it's very decent of you to want to help your sister, there are much, much better ways to go about it. There are a number of problems with the idea of committing a crime so that you can become her cellmate.

(1) It's wrong. In order to make this work, you would have to commit a crime against an innocent person. Your concern for your sister does not give you the right to do that.

(2) You're assuming that whomever is the victim of your crime will simply call the police and have you arrested. But not everyone responds calmly and reasonably when someone else commits a crime against them. Suppose they decide instead to break your legs, or just shoot you?

(3) You don't get to choose the length of your sentence or which jail you go to. You could easily be sent to an entirely different jail, perhaps for five years instead of one. That won't help your sister one bit.

(4) It will hurt her more than it will help her. How is she going to feel when she learns you became a criminal just to keep her company? She has enough problems without also feeling guilty about you sacrificing a year out of your life and acquiring a criminal record for her sake.

(5) A year in jail IS a bad thing, even if it's a nonviolent crime. And this is a very bad time in your life to spend a year in jail; at the age of 18, you're right in the middle of your transition into adulthood. This is the time to get education and/or start working, not to lose a year behind bars.

Here's how you CAN help your sister: be her unbreakable link to the outside. Send her letters frequently and visit whenever you can. Be encouraging and upbeat when you see her. Bring her gifts, if it is allowed (certain items should be permitted; check the rules of the facility she's in). If her friends and family are turning their backs on her, stick up for her and try to keep her support network together; she'll need it when she gets out.

Let her know that you love her and you're with her always in spirit. And when she's released, be there to welcome her with open arms.


I'm new to this website. I'll be honest and tell you I am currently drinking whiskey and high on xanax. Avoid your judgement. I think this way when I'm sober but I say it when i'm not anxious. My personal belief, stemming from an extensive amount of experiences with death and after coming to the full realization and acceptance that I will die at some point, is that death is simply a transitional period for our lives. This conscious part(i.e. the part that allows me to do this and 'live' the daily grind) isn't the only aspect of my life. This is just one period my soul..mind..spirit(whatever you want to call it) goes through before proceeding to the next level. So, my question is: Is it suicide if i'm just choosing to change consciousness? Please save me the organized religious bull shit and the bible quotes. I want to know what honest, real people think of that. I'm not asking for help. I'm asking if there's anyone else that understands where i'm coming from. No rush on response. I'm going to save this site in my favorites and check periodically. I honestly just want to set a death date for myself within the next two decades so I can finally start living my life the way I want to. It'll just be more comforting to know a few people think this is reasonable/understandable. (link)
Even if you're right - even if death is just a transition to some other form of consciousness - there's no guarantee it'll be a positive one.

When it comes to death, we all have exactly one reliable piece of evidence to go on: we have all been dead before. That is to say, there was a time for all of us when we were not alive. For me, it was the time before 1972. And I can recall none of it; as far as I know, I had NO form of consciousness before I was born. Of course, I have no recollection of that event either, but there were reliable witnesses so I'm pretty sure it happened.

That having been said, there is NO reason - none whatsoever - to assume that we will have any more consciousness after we are dead than we did before we were alive. All the ideas about life after death, continuing consciousness, Heaven and Hell, reincarnation, or any other death-transcending notions are all based on one thing, and one thing alone: Wishful thinking. It is disquieting to think that death is the final end for each of us.

There was once a group of about three dozen people who all took their own lives in the firm belief that they would be transported aboard an alien spaceship behind comet Hale-Bopp as it passed Earth in 1997. Just because they had this belief, it didn't make what they did "not suicide". Your own beliefs about consciousness following death may seem more rational than that, but it doesn't change the fact that you might be just as wrong, and you will be just as dead as everyone else who has ever killed themselves. It IS still suicide, and trying to call it a "transition" doesn't change that.

By all means, start living life the way you want to (so long as you have respect for the way others wish to live). But there is no need or point to setting a deadline to your life. For one thing, there is no guarantee that you'll make it there; lots of people die before they expect to. More significant that that, though, is the simple fact that taking your own life is the very last decision you will ever make, and there is no backing out of it if it doesn't go the way you think it will.

Suicide is an option for those who are facing a life of inescapable pain and misery; there might be a case to be made if you were a terminal cancer patient, for instance. But if you plan on "two decades" of living life the way you want to, you must be in reasonably good health. That's something real. Think hard before throwing that away for something which is likely to be completely imaginary.

I can offer you no comfort about death. Neither can anyone else. Those who say they can simply have no idea what they are talking about.


12/F

Hi! So I checked my mom's email because I needed to confirm something I couldn't do on my email (She doesn't care if I go on her email) and I saw this email...

It said something about a Child Development Counseler.. I looked up what it was and it said something about "Help your child's behaviour!!" ?!?!!!! I mean, they HATE me so I rarely even talk to them. The email was sent yesterday.. Do you think this email was sent automatically to random emails or she subscribed to this?!


They say "I give them a hard time". I NEVER talk to them!! Omg please help! (link)
First, calm down.

Let's look at a "worst-case scenario" - perhaps they are looking for a counselor for you to visit and work through some problems. If that's the case, then you're in good company. I'd bet that over half of all teenagers go to a counselor at some point in their adolescence, and those who don't probably should. I saw a counselor for two years in high school, and it helped. My brothers also both had counseling. My daughter is seeing a counselor now (she's 11), and I have no doubt that my three-year-old son will eventually spend some time in a counselor's office. It doesn't mean that you're crazy or that you're a problem child; it means that your parents think that you, LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, could use a little help in coping with the stresses of life. There is no more shame in it than in seeing a medical doctor when you sprain your knee, or calling a plumber when the pipes break.

Your parents are likely concerned about you. That's a point in their favor. Believe me, you wouldn't want parents who were NOT concerned about you.

You say they HATE you. Forgive me, but that just isn't so. There do exist situations where parents genuinely hate their children, and those unfortunate children usually don't live to your age. You give very little details about what would make you say such a thing, but my guess is that they simply don't know how to relate to you. The child they raised from a baby has changed, as we all do, and it's happened very quickly from their point of view. They want to be able to understand you, and help with whatever problems you may have (and ALL twelve-year-olds have problems).

If they do ask you to see a counselor, do yourself a favor, and don't rebel against the situation. It won't do anyone any good if you refuse to go, refuse to talk to the counselor, or get angry with your parents. If your parents hated you or even if they just didn't like you, the last thing they would do is send you to a counselor who would find out about that and expose them as bad parents!

There's another good reason for keeping a cool head about this, which is that if they DO send you to see a counselor, it is possible that you and that counselor just won't get along, and you'll need to tell your parents that it's not working. If you go into the situation all pissed off and uncooperative, they'll just think you're complaining because that's all you do. But if you go in with a reasonably positive attitude, they're more likely to listen to such things.

Give your parents the benefit of the doubt. Raising a kid isn't easy, and they're probably doing the best they can. If they're not... well, seeing a counselor can probably help with that situation.


Okay. Here we go.

Basically I'm a sixteen year old female who likes an older guy. Now, the first thing I'd imagine that would come to someone's mind while reading this is that it's probably a sexual thing. And it's not like that at all. He's actually one of the youth leaders at my church and he's in his early twenties.

Yes, I know, that's a HUGE age difference.
And yes, I know, it's a bit of a problem.
And that's why I'm seeking advice.

Across time, there have been some strange "moments", for lack of a better word, between him and I. For instance, I've looked over at him randomly and caught him staring at me a few times (but I'm sure that's just a coincidence because people look at other people all the time). Plus, he's joked around with me a lot, and we've talked on Facebook a bit (but then again, I'm sure it's nothing). By now, the majority of whoever's reading this is probably thinking that this is bad and it needs to stop because it's inappropriate and such. Which, in a way is true. But on the other hand, I feel like it's completely innocent because nothing inappropriate has happened or been said.

The way I see it, I'm just a girl with a crush that will probably go away in a while. But then I stop and think about how much I really like him. You might say it's just that lustful feeling or the feeling of danger that comes with liking an older guy. And I've asked myself if that was the case. Honestly, I don't believe it is.

And I don't even remember what my purpose for beginning this "question" thing was. I think I was going to ask if I should just quit on liking him, to put it bluntly.

Look. I don't want to. He's amazing, sweet, hilarious and all that jazz. And really, the ONLY thing that's a problem is the age difference.

My question is, should I let something like that get in the way? I mean OBVIOUSLY I'm not going to make a move or DO anything about it, at least not until I'm of legal age. But what SHOULD I do, guys? I don't want to go for it or anything because of how badly it might end up (loss of friendship, the pure awkwardness of it, etc.). But I definitely don't want to miss out on the opportunity of getting to know a great guy.

Help? (link)
One thing which you haven't made clear is how he feels about you. You're very vague about what exactly you discuss on Facebook, or any other interaction you have. Is it possible that he sees you not as any kind of romantic prospect, but rather as a a young person to whom he can reach out and help to learn? That is, after all, part of his job.

And since that IS part of his job, it is important that you keep it on that level. For you to approach him in a romantic or sexual way would be very inappropriate and could cause him great harm. We live in a time when there have been much-publicized cases of church leaders in scandalous relationships with young members of the church; if something even approaching a dating relationship happened between the two of you, and word of it got out, he would face severe consequences.

But, you already seem to know that, since you've stated clearly that you don't intend to DO anything about it. And that's how it will have to be.

Now, you can't very well stop yourself from liking him. Nor should you; lying to yourself about the way you feel is not a good habit to get into. But don't focus exclusively on him either. Naturally, a man in his early twenties is generally going to seem more attractive to you than one your own age; he's more confident and mature, clearly a man instead of a boy, and that is all very appealing. And there was a time in human history when an age gap like that would NOT have been considered inappropriate (of course, if you had lived at that time, you probably wouldn't have had much say in the matter of which men you see socially, so there's no point in wishing things were still like that). The point is that basic instincts change slower than society's rules, so it is natural that you would find him attractive in spite of the age gap.

Go ahead and crush on him, and leave it at that. But also realize that he will be attracted primarily to women four to six years older than you, and the odds are good that he'll be unavailable by the time you're a legal adult. So don't pass up other prospects closer to your age while you're waiting for that day to come.


Can a female get pregnat by swallowing another females cum (link)
Not a chance. Pregnancy requires sperm and egg; it is literally impossible for two females to have any form of sex, or any other contact, which results in pregnancy. Even if a person were to somehow swallow a fertilized egg cell (which, again, would require sperm to have been introduced at some point), it would be rapidly and completely destroyed by stomach acid.


What happens if he asks me out but im not allowed to and when i tell him he cries? (link)
If that's the extent of his control over his emotions, he's not mature enough to be dating anyone. Let him go home to his Mommy.


hi in 13f cuttter wore bracelts last year covered in cuts start gym in december must wear tee shirt marroon shorts makeup tricks help me please they made fun of me last year when they showed
(link)
Go to your school counselor and explain the situation. You should be able to get a waiver of sorts which will allow you to wear long sleeves in gym class. If one of your classmates asks why, tell them it's not their concern.

Also, if you haven't taken steps to break the cutting habit, you should do so as soon as possible. It is a dangerous habit, potentially life-threatening if you get tetanus or another bad infection. There are things which you can do about it but you will likely need some help.




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