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The object of my column will be to help you help yourself by pointing you in the right direction if I can or by supplying you with WEB resources you can use that will help you find the answers your looking for.
advice
Im 14/ f and ive been a selfharming since the beginning of february.. I have been getting better tho! Anyways my mom and I were sitting side by side waiting for my sister and I forgot to put a bandage on my cuts when I changef into a tank top.. she was on the phone and looked at my wrist and thered only 2 visible ones and pointed at them with a questioning face.. I pulled my arm away and went to the bathroom and cried my eyes out.. what do I say? Our cats are declawed. .
Cutting is a sign of depression. You cut to feel something, to relieve the stress of a situation. Stress is a major part of depression. In teenagers what was once considered to be a phase that teenagers went through now has a diagnostic name. It is called "Teenage Depression" and is treatable.
Lets face it, if anyone has a right to be depressed these day it is a teenager. A teenager is also a "Tweener", no longer a child yet not an adult. Yes Tweener is an actual word with the definition I gave. More is expected of you at home, in school and in social aspects. For girls it is even harder as puberty is causing changes internally and externally to you that you need to cope with. Then there are boys; they are around you like Bee's to honey. This is a lot of stress for anyone, even an adult.
In all of us there are two chemicals in the that are secreted into the brain, they are hormones that help stabilize moods especially under stress. Many of us at times do not have enough of these chemicals to combat the stress we are under or put ourselves under.
The quick fix is you see a board certified psychiatrist, no your not crazy, who is the best trained to deal with this because of where the chemicals are secreted. Generally a simple pill taken once a day will improve the amount of hormones needed to effect mood stabilization.
The long term fix is talk therapy with a psychologist who will help you find the reason for the stress and better ways of dealing with it other than cutting. With both Doctors your conversations with them are confidential. You must give your permission for them to discuss or disclose what is said in discussion with either of them. If you do not give permission when and if they talk with your parents it will be in generalities as to what they can do to help you.
So with all this being said: My advice to you is to tell mom the truth and ask for her help. She is already thinking the worst because of what she has seen. she is waiting for you to come to her so I suspect se is not going to scream at you.
What needs to happen next, after coming clean with mom is a visit to your family doctor for a complete physical. This is to rule out any organic reasons for your problem. Then you ask for a referral to a Board Certified Psychiatrist. That Doctor will supply and monitor medication if needed and refer you for talk therapy.
Depression hurts, I know as I suffered from it. There is help and it starts with telling mom and asking for help. You do not have to cut to feel better.
So, I have a boyfriend who I really really love..But ive met this guy on facebook. He started to chat me up and persuaded me to sort of being slutty towards him..Its all been done through the chat..The thing is that i decided to go a little further..and I sent him a picture of me being naked..Ive been feeling miserable ever since..What was I thinking?? I decided not to talk to this guy anymore..please.I need some advice..Thanks!!
You are a registered user. When you signed up you gave your age. That information is available to modirotors of which I am one.
I can't tell you why you did this; what I can tell you is the consequences of what you did.
The information about you says your 27, if so you should know better, but at least your not guilty of sending child porn. What you have done is exposed yourself to someone you don't know personally. He now can send this picture out for any and all to see. This is the problem of sending things out over the web, you lose control over the information and or the pictures you send.
Now or in the future that picture will come back to bite you. Once out on the web it is free to anyone to use. Just asking for it back does not mean he will not retain the original image he received or that he has not already posted it to some website.
In the news recently a high school teacher lost her job because her school principal found she had posed for nude pictures. In her case she was a paid model and knew what she was doing. What if in the future you are in a position where a nude picture of you is found. It is also found to be detrimental to your job. This is what you have opened yourself up for by sending a nude picture of yourself out over the Internet to someone you really do not know. This is not a maybe type thing, it has happened. Employers do search the Internet for information on candidates for employment. How would you feel if this or future pictures surface.
I have in the past advised others who are thinking of doing what you have done as follows. When thinking of sending pictures over the Internet; do not send any picture of yourself you would not show to your father. If you follow this rule you have nothing to worry about in the future.
would the above develop at the age of two if the mother was ex anorexic??
The studies on this topic are not definitive enough to say for certainty that anorexia is genetic or not. The same studies also are divided on whether this is a physical or mental illness.
In an infant at age two who will not eat it is not generally considered to be an eating disorder as it is generally the result of a physical problem This problem at times can be hard to diagnose but an eating disorder is generally not seen until the person is more self aware of their image. This is not the case for infants.
Anorexia is treatable through mostly behavioral modification which puts treatment into the psychiatric classification. Most group insurance coverage has little to poor coverage in this area. Which is why people find they are not covered for this problem.
The indecisiveness nature of the studies as to cause gives the insurance companies the out they need to refuse medical coverage.
If you know an infant that is not eating. It is not anorexia. The child is suffering from a physical ailment and may need to see doctors specializing in digestive track disorders in order to help the infant start eating again.
So im 13/m and i am addicted to masturbating... i also watch porn but i have a gf. So is it ok if i watch porn? Am i a perv or cheating in a way?
Relax your normal. For the record I am old enough to be your grandfather and I probably have more liberal views on the subject of sex than your parents or you would not be writing to us.
Masturbation is normal for someone your age as long as it is not an all encompassing subject. By that I mean you do nothing else but go to school then come home and masturbate.
It is even normal for someone your age in the early stages of puberty to masturbate 3 or 4 times a day. Masturbation is a safe way to relieve the sexual tension brought on by puberty. Also you learn about your bodies sexual needs and desires through masturbation and fantasizing.
According to a survey done a year or so ago 85% of us masturbate. That means that the majority of us, which would include your parents masturbate. When it comes to married adults masturbation is usually done as part of foreplay for intercourse and is called mutual masturbation. This is where one partner masturbates the other. The male fingers the feel male and the female strokes the male. I know this may be TMI though as I said at first my view are quite liberal and I want you to know you are normal and not some weird 13 year old.
Do your parents know you masturbate? I would think mom has seen the evidence when doing the laundry. If this was something abnormal you would have heard from her or dad by now. It is far better at your age to masturbate then to try and force some young girl to do something she is not ready for. By taking care of your own needs this way you will gain the respect of a young lady much faster and when she is ready you will be the one she will chose to go to that next level with.
I do lots of inappropriate stuff on the internet.. like porn. I delete the history, bu when i am going to sign up for a job will they find it? Will it affect me somehow?
I'm not sure the previous advisor understood your question or maybe I am not understanding your question.
If your question is can a future employer find out about your Internet viewing habits in your own home on your own computer? The answer is almost a complete no. Your future employer would first have to have access to your personnel computer, this of course is something they are not entitled too. Next even though you delete your history there is still fragments of it that can be recaptured by a skilled forensic computer expert. This would be a large expense for an employer to go through just hire someone.
Now if you were applying for a Top Secret government job. Then maybe you would be asked to comply with these intrusions as these are things others could blackmail you with.
Once employed using the employers computer they can monitor your computer use real time. Many employers do so through their "IT" departments. Viewing anything or using the employers computer to view or do anything inappropriate would be grounds for termination.
ok so i am a 16 year old girl and really bi-curious? I think i like guys but if i get into a relationship i end it too quickly because it doesnt feel right when i am with a guy. but I'll look at a guy and say he's hot but it ends there. as with girls though i've never had a crush on a girl but i can see myself in a relationship with one (a girl in general). i am just so confused, i don't think there is anything wrong with being gay but i am afraid that if i am that I'll loose friends and be judged harshly. i know my family will accept but i am still scared.
Relax you are a normal teenager. Being bi-curious is a normal part of your teenage years. It is part of learning about who your are sexually. In short finding your sexual identity.
I believe the fact that you like boys and find them hot though you stop there is not a sign you are a lesbian. It is more of a sign you fear of going to the next level sexually with a boy. Once again this is normal.
You may be saying that all your friends are at that next level and this may be true. They have reached that level for it is comfortable for them. Not everyone is comfortable in sexual exploration with someone of the opposite sex at the same age. Some of us take longer to get to that level of comfort. Some will even force themselves into that arena because they want to be with the in crowd.
My advise is not to be ashamed or fearful of who or what you are feeling. As I said you are having normal feelings. If you want to explore your curiosity then that is something for you to decide. The same is true for when you want to explore with boys.
Until then relax and enjoy this time of your life for it goes by very quickly.
I have this coworker, and he and I have become pretty good friends. I think I'm falling for him, and it appears to be mutual, I can just sense it. Before, about a year ago, we were acquaintances and kind of joked around. Then our friendship started growing, and we became pretty good friends, to the point where we have a 6 hour long conversations on Facebook about serious stuff, funny stuff, the whole sha-bang. Now it's sort of taken an awkward turn. When we're scheduled on the same shifts, at first we are sooooooo awkward. Then as the shift goes on, we're close again. He's even started playfully teasing, and we've got some witty banter going on. Great development, right? Awesome news, eh? WRONG.
See, there's an important factor I think we both like to forget... I'm a hardcore Christian, and he's an Atheist. It says on his Facebook he's a "Proud Atheist", and not that Facebook has the overall say in life, but if he took the time to write that and become part of a FB group with that same title, then I'm thinking he's pretty sure about it. I'm very serious about dating/relationships. I'm 18, and I've never dated anyone. I didn't want to date in high school because 9/10 times they fail, and are just drama-infested wastes of time. So, I date with purpose, I don't mess around. I can't date anyone who I couldn't see myself marrying. Not that I have to know RIGHT AWAY, or even in the first year. But if I knew I'd never marry that person right from get-go, I can't date them. Whether addicted to meth, never want to have kids, that sort of thing. I graduated in 2012, and since then I've just been waiting to meet the right dude to date. And... I think he takes the cake. He's intelligent, yet sensitive. Hilarious, caring, understanding, supportive, confident not big-headed, musically inclined, and he's witty, yet mature in the important ways. He's a nerd, like me. He's perfect in every way except one! HE'S AN ATHEIST. Whyyyyyyyy me?
I know there's no way I'm ever going to marry an atheist. My future husband will at least be aware of the fact that Jesus is our Lord and Savior. I probably sound snobby, but think about it. How would we raise our kids? Our mindsets in life would be so different. I'd be living for the Lord, alone. But... I like this guy a lot. I'm crushed. I think about him when I fall asleep and when I wake up. And I'll think "Why don't we date- oh yeah. Crap." and my heart sinks. I'm trying to cling on to some hope. I suppose my question is, do atheists convert often?
I wouldn't want him to make that change for me. Not at all. I'd want him to do it because HE wanted to. I want him to know the love of God, feel the powerful emotion the Holy Spirit can bring you, see life with God's Goggles, if you will, haha. So, what would you suggest I do? Do you have any advice/suggestions? Or should I just suck it up and move on? Thank you for reading.
Your question is: "How often do atheists change their minds?" I'm not sure there is an answer to this question, at least not the answer you are looking for.
The answer to many of the questions we receive is a need for the parties involved to communicate. It is apparent that you have some real feelings for this guy though there is only one thing that would keep you from committing to him, That being his atheists beliefs.
While I have my doubts about their being true atheists, given to the saying; "there are no atheists in foxholes." Would you feel any different if his views on religion were that he was an agnostic or of another religion such as Judaism or Protestant and firm in his religious belief as you are. As for any children most religions hold that a child is the product of its mother and therefore the religion of the mother. Something to keep in mind.
One thing that is important in any relationship is communication. You have an issue that really needs to be discussed between you two before you go writing off someone who may have just as many feelings for you as you have for him.
I will tell you what I have told my son. This is not a perfect world. There is not many custom fits to be had. In fact we are a world of off that rack opportunities that we tailor to fit.
This is what I see in what you have written. You have a man you could see yourself having a life with but for one factor. That factor is his belief in being an atheist. You ask in a sense can he change his mind on this? No one can answer this but him. You ask what about children and their religious up bringing? Again this is a question that needs to be discussed between the two of you as it would need to be discussed between people of two different religions.
Right now I see your dilemma though I cannot offer a solution as you have not taken the next step needed to see if there is a resolution or if you need to find someone else.
The only suggestion, the only appropriate suggestion that can be offered at this time is that you two need to discuss this one question concerning your relationship to see if it is a permanent road block to a happy future for you both.
I like text books and doing the questions/exercises in them. Where would I get some free ones? New text books cost a lot of money.
I would suggest contacting book stores, college book stores, schools in your area and publishers of text books you are interested in. Ask what they do with old or out dated text books.
I would think there is little market for an outdated text book other than sending them to a recycler. If you can convince any of them all you want these books for is self improvement and not for class room use they may offer to send you the book(s) you are looking for.
hi, i am searching the internet for help and thought i would at least let someone know what is going on in my life. i am 54 years old. my twin sister has mismanaged money left to us by my mother. she is now going to try to have me evicted from a home we own together based on any excuse she can find. i believe she is bipolar or schizophrenic. all of this started when she got married 12 yrs ago to a very narcissistic man. they have depleted my sisters and mines money instead of leaving it invested to draw interest to support 2 properties in our estate. they also took out a home equity loan which they need to get rid of in their lives. she is beyond manic. she visits me and destroys my life. she will not stay away. she is threatening to evict me and my 3 dogs if i do not sell the house. and she will start court proceedings and knows i have no money for an attorney. it is such a mess. overwhelming. i am so sad all day everyday and there is no reasoning with her. it has been one bad financial decision after another so she and her husband can live a lifestyle. she is on the edge and trying to give me her problems again. she is irrational. i cannot overstate this. she blames me for everything and i have had nothing to do with anything. my life is so off track. i am going thru my own menopause issues and i havent been well due to extreme anxiety and overwhelming depression. she knows that yet she keeps piling it on. she is the victim of mind control. others claim it she is the real deal. her husband is a phd and teaches or taught psychological warfare techniques in the military. he has complete control of her mind and can get her to do anything even destroy what took decades to accomplish. it is so overwhelming. i feel so alone in this world. i do have a friend who helps me as much as he can. i don't know what to do. i need to talk to someone about what to do. she will be visiting in a couple of weeks and will scream and rant at me. i dont want her here. i have told her we need to talk to a 3rd party but she will not do it. we are in crisis. i am so afraid for the future. please write back asap. i don't know where to turn.
What you need to do is contact an attorney. Most initial consultations are at no charge. From what you have written it sounds like your sister hass not only mismanaged her money but may have violated her fiduciary responsibilities to you.
If I am correct there will be remedy at law for which there will be a recovery of money. Some attorneys will work for a portion of the recovery rather than an hourly fee. The only way to find this out is to speak with an attorney and find out what your options are and what remedy you have at law. If there is a recovery due you she can be forced to sell her assets to pay you by the courts.
If you want to keep you sister from visiting go to the district court and take out an "order of protection" against her and her husband. This order will keep her away from you and from harassing you under threat of going to jail.
As for evicting you from your home I don't think that can be done if she is asking you to sell it. If you have to be the one to sell it then you own it or own part of it. You cannot be evicted from something you own unless say you are not paying the mortgage. Then the bank will be the evicting party. Here again it best to seek the help of an attorney to find out what is going on.
I found a small white bump on my leg. Its a little painful to touch. Any ideas what it could be?
It would be wrong for me to try and diagnose the problem as I am not a doctor. Even if I were I would have to see it to diagnose it.
For the most part 99% of these little bumps are nothing to be concerned about. Since it bothers you it could be something as simple as an in grown hair that has become infected and needs a doctors attention.
In any case this is something you should bring to mom or dads attention and let then decide if seeing the doctor is in order or if there is some home remedy they feel will fix the problem.
If for some reason your thinking along the lines that this could be some type of STD. Don't even go there as that is of the remotest possibilities, one I doubt your parents would jump to upon first looking at this bump.
13/m
so i want to talk to my mother about my "love life" since i got myself a girlfriend, and i cant keep it secret forever. So how do i start a conversation about what is going on?
For a guy to tell his mom he has a love interest is generally easier than a girl to tell her mom for some reason. Also moms' generally have sixth sense about these things and either already know you do or sense you do and are just waiting until you are ready to talk to them about it. One good indication that mom already knows is to have dad have a reminder talk to you about sex or if dad is not in the picture she will.
How do you start the conversation: I've always found the direct approach to be the best approach. Depending on whether you want this to be something that is between you and mom or if it is open for family knowledge; you could bring it up at dinner saying something to the effect: "There is this girl I'm interested in and I could use some advice on dating."
If you want to keep this between just you and mom. Then just ask mom if it is possible for the two of you to have some mom and son time, either at home together or maybe out someplace quiet that you can talk. Then the same opening statement still works.
There is nothing to be embarrassed about having a girlfriend. I had my first girlfriend at age 12 in Junior high school. It was a little hard to hide since she lived on the other side of town and mom had to drive me to her house and to the movies when we went out.
My friends parents keep tagging along whenever we hang out somewhere, my mom trusts me to hang out with people by myself. But I have never had this experience because my friends parents are ALWAYS there. So, what should I do?
This is one of those question where knowing your age is important to the way any of us would answer you. Also knowing if you are of the same or opposite sex would be helpful.
You use the term "hanging out," not dating. So I will key in on that as an age reference." I am also going to assume you are of opposite sexes.
Assuming you are in your early teens or preteens having your friends parents tag along is not that inappropriate. Especially if you are a year or two older and of the male sex. In the dark ages of great-grandparents this was called chaperoning and was very normal. There are some places in the world to day where chaperoning is till very normal.
If you are 15 or 16 years of age or older and this is happening. Then something is wrong here. These parents are for whatever reason they have, be it religious or otherwise not trusting of either you or your friend.
If it is not for religious reasons which you cannot combat. Then a discussion would be in order to find out why and see if there is a way to resolve this. When I say discussion I mean just that. If you come at them in any way other than a sincere manner to ask why they need to follow you around when your together you will not get to a point where you can find a resolution.
Example. When my Son was young until he was old enough to drive; we would of course have to drive him and his friends different places. The Mall was a favorite hangout. On many occasion we would drive them there, drop them off then my wife and I would go in have dinner and shop or just hang out ourselves until it was time to pick them up and return home. It was easier then going home and coming back.
We made a rule with them, or rather them with us. They needed to acknowledge us first if we happened to come together while strolling the Mall. If they were with girls we should not attempt to acknowledge them but to walk on by as if they were any other teenage. This worked for us.
We were not there to check up on them. It was a convenience for us and sort of a night out as well. At the same time we were there a cell phone call or page away should they need us for any reason.
hi, im 16 male.. and i want to ask question.. me and mu girlfriend (17) were trying to do stuff but she is still a virgin and I've put my penis inside her without condom just only about a 1 cm maybe even less .. i couldn't of gone further because it hurt her so much.. my question can she get pregnant from that ?
The answer to your question is based on whether or not there was any semen present on your penis when you tried to enter her. If you had an emission of what is referred to as precum, which is emitted as a lubricant. Then there was semen; as precum has enough semen in it to cause pregnancy. If you ejaculated then of course there was sufficient semen to cause pregnancy.
You know the answers to these questions. If it is no then she could not be pregnant. If the answer is yes or maybe have her take a home pregnancy test. If this happened with in the last 24 to 48 hours she should take the plan B pill.
i am 9 years old. can some 9 year old boy have sex with me?
Short answer, No.
Long answer. You are to young to even be on this sight. You are way to young to even be thinking about sex let alone having sex. Even if the boy was capable of having sex with you. You are not yet fully developed as a women and sex would not only be very painful but could do physical harm to you as well.
Sex is an adult activity. Something that requires a great deal of maturity to enter into. Like it or not you are still a child with child like maturity. There are many stages of love that must be experienced before you go down the path to sex. Don't rush yourself for missing out on these stages is not only wrong you will be cheating yourself out of many wonderful experiences.
Im writing an essay about Uninformed America, basically on how much knowledge we lack, or how ignorant some people are regarding facts about the history of our country, the government, politics, etc. It goes on to explain how teens are too involved with social media to care about their education and so forth. Basically what I'm looking for is some help and or personal opinions on this subject. I've only gotten 2/8 pages done so I'd like all the help I can get.
Thank you for your time!
I'm not sure how much my views on the subject will be to you though I am happy to share them with you.
First a bit of demographics for you. I'm old enough to be your grandfather and I have lived my entire life either in the North East or mid Atlantic part of the country.
When I went to school, back in the dark ages of blackboards, pencils and paper and mimeograph machines. We started to learn about geography and history in Elementary school. I remember in 5th grade having to know all 48 state capitals and for history we learned when each state joined the Union. We also learned about World Geography while in Elementary School.
Today Geography is not taught with the depth that it was when I was in school. History was an on going subject which started in early elementary school and continued through High School Social Studies. In 7th grade we had a required Civics class where we learned about the different forms of government with emphasis on our government.
These teachings are not emphasized today in our schools. Our schools teach what is need to know to pass standardized test. We are test teaching so that we can move forward. This to me is the crux of the problem you are exploring.
If it does not directly effect me I do not need to worry or know about it. That is a bad attitude to take as it allows for you to walked over and snowed on issues that should be of great important to you. Politicians tell you the a certain percentage, a very large percentage of the people support an imitative. How do you know this if you know nothing about the imitative?
The Internet is a great resource to find information. To me it is the encyclopedia of my day on steroids. Today's teenagers do not realize the elephant they have at their finger tips because of the many other social things the Internet brings.
Instead of researching a question as we did with the help of reference material. Today's teenager goes on-line and asks someone for the answer. In somewhat of the manner you are. In your question though you are asking for what amounts to research information you can include in your essay. This type of information can only come from first hand information, not from reference sources.
In many of the questions we receive my answer is: Life is like an algebra problem. You need to follow the proper steps in order if you want to get the right answer. Today the uninformed among us want the answer but are not willing to follow the steps needed to get the answer preferring instead to take short cuts to get an answer. This usually leads to wrong and misinformed information.
Social media is only part of the problem. Adding to the problem is the need for instant gratification. To that end we have things such as the 24 hour news cycle, the need to be first without regard for being right. The need for self-promotion regardless of who or what may be hurt or endangered.
The lack of knowledge also breeds egotism, bullies, greed and the need to bluff our way though things we do not understand. One day this house of cards the young people of today are building will all come crashing down upon them. It started with a need for expedience in education.
I asked a question earlier about how I didn't know if I should get engaged before my sister got married. By the way, I should have made it clear that I don't want to get engaged for the attention. I was saying that I ideally would like to wait so that she can have her own attention and so can I, but I don't know if that can work out. I came up with an idea a short while ago that I hope will help the situation. My sister just got engaged and is getting married in June of 2014, so what if I waited until February or so until I got engaged. Actually I don't know when my boyfriend will propose to me, but I guess I could talk to him about this and see how he feels. If we did that, then my sister could be in the spotlight by herself for almost a year and we would only be engaged together for a very short time. I'd still like to wait so that we can each have our own spotlight spotlighting the time we got engaged until the time we got married, but I don't see how that can give me enough time to plan a wedding by the time we are needing to get married.
In both you questions you use the term; " needing to get married." You do not explain what you mean by "needing to get married." Without this information it would be hard for any of us to give you any better information then we may have already done or may be able to do without understanding what you mean by this.
Hi, so I have an Instagram. Recently, I was talking to this girl then a random girl just said I was bothering her.
We got into a conversation, then she said she'd hack me from her family. She also said they'd hurt me. When I ask her what she meant, she said they'd find me, get my number from the cops, etc.
I'm scared. What do I do?! She hacked my friend before. I'm so scared!
Call the police anyway you would be surprised what the Cyber unit can find if they can get into your Instagram account you don't have to put us with this
She is most likely a whack job that gets off doing these things though in this day and age you cannot take that chance. Call the police and report this, hopefully you still have the Instagram. If your local police do not have a cyber crimes unit your state police do.
The making of these types of threats, even in jest, are illegal. It does not matter if you know this girl or not. There is information in the header of the address that the Cyber unit can use to trace the message back to the computer and the user through the Internet host.
A threat has been made. You can not tell if the threat is real or not. In this instance one must assume the threat is real. That makes the threat an assault. Depending on exactly what is said and what the police find on investigation will depend on who whether this person is charged with a misdemeanor assault charge or a felony.
i am a virgin . i and my boy friend were fooling around . he was naked but i was having my panties . later i found that my panty was a little wet because of his pre ejaculation . but there was no direct contact . can i get pregnant ? usually my periods are always late by 3 or 4 days . this month i was supposed to get them on 8th may but i dint get them yet . plz help me . i am tensed
First: Stress, such as worrying if your are pregnant or not, has caused more girls periods to be late or missed all together than one might think. Your cycle is a very delicate thing and it does not take much to throw it off.
Next; it is possible to become pregnant if a boys semen lands on you but not inside you. It is rare and depends on many different things being in alignment.
1. How close was the semen to the opening of your vagina? The further away the less likely you are to be pregnant.
2. You have to ovulating at the time this happened. Meaning an egg has been ejected from your ovaries and is in the three day window of fertility to be fertilized. In 80% of women this occurs during the middle 14 days of their periods.
3. The fact that the semen had to swim through your panties did limit the amount that got through and may have weakened them a bit.
As I said it is rare but possible you could have gotten pregnant. Most likely though your stressed out about being pregnant. A home pregnancy test will either prove or disprove a pregnancy. Most likely it will disprove it and you will eliminate your stress. You may not get this months period but your next will come on schedule.
If you are over 14 years of age there is a law called HIPPA, which is a Federal Law. This law gives anyone 14 and older total medical confidentiality over their reproductive system.
Meaning you can make appoints, see doctors, ask questions and be treated for any condition related to your reproductive system without parental knowledge.
Congress passed this law not to promote sex in young people but to promote sexual health so that young people would seek medical treatment when needed. Information regarding these visits cannot be released and requires your expressed written permission to be released to anyone including your parents. Without it doctors can say nothing to anyone.
Under this law you can also request birth control pills. I suggest since you are experimenting with sex in this manner that you do so. Birth control pills will also regulate your period for you.
One last thing about HIPPA. Mom can still force you to see a doctor though if she requests any type of female exam all you need say is; "I invoke my rights under HIPPA." At this point mom, if she is in the exam room, will be asked to wait in the waiting room. You can at this point stop the exam or complete it confident that none of this will be available to mom with out your consent.
This law is not greatly known by the young people it affects. I tell you this for I would tell my own granddaughter; not to promote promiscuity but it is your right to know it. Also to hopefully reduce the stress you have placed on yourself.
I miss my family. I miss what it used to be. I miss the feeling when we were kids and everything seemed wonderful. I had my sister and my brother as my best friends. We got each other.
Now, I am in college. My sister has vanished for 3+ years. My brother gives me the cold shoulder every time I come home. My father is a block of human flesh that cannot understand what it means to care for another, to have sympathy. His head is in the past and does not realize it. He expects women to be servants and men to do the heavy work. When one thing is said to him, he acts like he listens, but responds with his own self centered opinion. He is impossible. My mother is a mad mess because this is not what she envisioned her life as. She feels hopeless.
That takes it back to me. I'm in the middle of trying to move on with my life but still desire the love of my family. One thing I did not mention is that I have an older brother, not my once best friend younger brother, but an older abusive brother. He would hit us, especially me, and manipulate my parents into thinking that we were all in the wrong and in the end no one gets punished. He lied, he bullied, he harassed. My parents? On the occasion my father, when we were kids would protect us. He saw what was going on. This was during the time that my sister and I were complaining a lot. My mother at the time favored my older brother like no other. She bought him the good glasses, bought my sister and I the ones that made our visions get progressively and significantly worse after a year. She would pick him up whenever he called. We would have to wait 1-3 hours in the front of school for her to get her ass to us.
One time, my older brother, forcefully dug his nails into my hands because I wouldn't let him take my CD out of the computer that I was using. He wanted me to get off so that he could use it.I refused. When my dad came home, we showed him the blood on the computer and the fingernail marks on my hand. My dad saw what was going on now, and he talked to my brother. I don't think he ever punished him, but he saw what was going on.
My parents never ever did anything about that. Their resolution? To keep him calm and happy. I won't forget the time he took a butcher knife and went to my sister's and I's bedroom saying that just a little bit, just a little bit it will be over. It will all be over. My parents were trying to calm him down. And once it was over, it was over. No punishment for him. No talking to my sister or me.
That was and still is how my parents deal with disruption in any calm in the family. They try to get it to go away, and once away, ignore the fact that it ever happened. It is no wonder that everyone suffers. They don't understand the fact that my older brother needs some fucking significant help. That heffer is messed up. Fucking messed up. And they put up with that?? What the fuck is wrong with them and what the fuck is wrong with him.
This is all insanity. Do you have any advice on how I should go about this insanity? Or other suggestions?
I don't think any of us have the expertise to offer the type of advice you need. Fortunately there is an organization that does have the expertise and can point you to people where you live that can help you. The name of the organization is RAINN.
RAINN stands for Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network, They operate a 24/7 hotline you should call. That number is 1-800-656-HOPE. The call is free and totally confidential. The call is automatically routed to a crisis center near you where specially trained people can help you with your question.
What I see is a dysfunctional family. A big brother that is in need a psychiatric help who is a danger to himself and others. If you have siblings living at home under the age of 18 there may be need for intervention by child services to insure their safety.
As for you; I think you would do well to contact the health center at school for counseling with a psychologist. The people at RAINN will do a better job of explaining this with you than I can here.
From what you have written your home life was troubling. You need to in a sense get right with your childhood experiences so that you can go forward with your life. We can't correct the past; what we can do is learn to live with it in a healthy way so it does not ruin the future for us. So that we do not inflict this on our children. This is where the psychologist comes in. This is the person you can say anything and everything to. Get everything off your chest confident that whatever is said is totally confidential.
What RAINN and the psychologist can do for you is to help you get right with you. RAINN can help you get your brother the help he needs for as I said from what you have written he appears to be a danger to himself and others. Your younger siblings who may be under 18 can also be helped by contacting the proper agencies.
As for your parents that will depend on whether you have siblings under 18 at home. If you do then the same agencies that are there to protect you siblings will work with your parents to correct their parenting skills.
I hope my advice helps.
There's not much more to my question than what's in the title. My sister is getting married in June of 2014 and I'm thinking I might get married around that time as well. Like in August maybe. There's a reason why it may be important that I get married by that time, but I'm worried that people will think I just did it to steal my sister's thunder. Also, it's my dream to get married married in this church at the Grand Canyon, which I'm afraid people will think of as a real thunder stealing attempt. Also, I'd kind of like my own thunder. I don't get much at all. I got a tooth infection in February that was so bad I had to go to the emergency room and I liked it because it got me some attention. It's not a good enough reason to not get married when I plan to, but still. What do you think my sister and family will say?
Other than saying; "There's a reason why it may be important that I get married by that time," and "I'd kind of like my own thunder. I don't get much at all." You don't give any reason for your question that I can base an answer on.
If you have a valid reason why you need to marry before August of 2014 then I would say; no you are not stealing any thunder. Some valid reasons for needing to be married by that time that I can think of would be a scheduled deployment of your fiancé or graduation and moving for a job offering. Things of this nature.
It would not be stealing her thunder if you were to marry before her say in December of this year or before March of 2014. This would give everyone time to give her the and you both the attention your weddings deserve.
One other possibility. Have you thought about you and your sister having a double wedding. You want to talk about thunder for the brides, this one is it. Many couples have double wedding most if not all I have ever seen were between friends. I'm sure sisters and brothers have had double weddings but frankly I haven't heard of any so I believe them to be very rare.
Then their is the fact of the cost involved for the wedding. Two couple one venue is half the price if each couple is paying for their own wedding. I know you have your heart set on a specific Chapel. Maybe your sister will not have a specific church that she must be married in and not mind being married in the church you feel strongly about.
I will tell you this. If you and your sister do agree to a double wedding your friends and family will not soon forget the event for it is as I said rare when two siblings marry at the same time and place.