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Me and my boyfriend are in a long distance relationship. What are the odds of long distance working out. I love him so much we both graduate next year... is it worth the wait? (link)
If you think it is, then it is.

My relationship started out as a long distance one. Now we live together and have been seeing each other for 7 years.


Me and my bestfriend have hung out for a week... And we so sleep in the same bed but on different sides until last Friday after his party... We cuddled, we weren't drunk. It was after his girlfriend and everyone left I went to bed first and he came in and tried to get on of the blankets from me and at the party he said he was gonna cuddle with me... And we did... All night but. My bestfriend massaged my back, caressed my thighs and stomach and butt Keep in mind that we are bestfriends but we've never done this even when we're drunk. The next morning I went to the bathroom and came back not feeling good so he put his arm around me more but caressed his finger on my bra and he was trying to hold my hand too as well as his morning wood on my back .. And no he wants no one to know. To be honest I liked it but i dont want to like him again. And i dont.. What the hell is up? (link)
He's into you and doesn't want to lose his girlfriend is what's up, but he's handling it in a really bad way.

I would advise not sleeping in the same bed with him anymore. You don't want to like him and that's probably good for you. What he did is a sign of disrespect toward his current girlfriend. You can imagine how you would feel if you were dating him and he did this with someone else without telling you.


Does anyone know how much to feed a puppy and how often you are supposed to do the feeding? (link)
http://www.cesarsway.com/dog-care/dog-nutrition/Puppy-Feeding-Guidelines Here's a puppy feeding guide.


I'm 20 years old and had a lot of sex in the past 5 years with over 25 partners, but for some reason I prefer masturbation over sex in the past few months which obviously makes my girlfriend of 6 months furious. Is it normal to prefer masturbation over sex or is there something wrong with me?? (link)
Is it common? Yes, you certainly aren't abnormal.

Is it a problem for your relationship? That's a different matter entirely. Since your girlfriend is furious about it, I'd say it is.

I assume you watch porn while you masturbate, which is fine, but it can desensitize you. I think cutting back could seriously help your relationship.


(Please don't tell me to go to a doctor.. I realize most people here are not doctors, but I want personal opinions..)

Hi. I'm 14 years old, and my BMI is considered "Normal weight". Anyway, I've been counting calories since late 2011. I was quite young when I started. I was bullied for my weight when I was younger, so I didn't want to get any bigger. Anyway, I keep close watch on my sugar intake, sodium intake, etc. I eat less than 1000 calories a day.. Probably 500 a day or around there. I'm not limiting myself, I just don't really have a good past with food, causing me to not eat. I starve pretty frequently since I have trouble with figuring out what to eat (Like making sure it's not too "fatty"). I CONSTANTLY have my mind focused on food and my weight; Having negative thoughts like telling myself I'm so fat and gross. I can't stop them either. I always try to distract myself from these thoughts, but.. Do you think I have an eating disorder? I don't want to go to the doctor because I'm afraid they'll force-feed me, causing me to gain a bunch of weight. I'm pretty much afraid of gaining weight, and I want to be 100 pounds. It's so aggravating... What do you think? It's not like I'm trying to seek attention or even wanting to do this, I just can't help it. I don't want to be bigger than I already am. (link)
It doesn't sound like you have an eating disorder to me. It just sounds like you knowingly make unhealthy choices concerning your diet due to issues with poor body image. Of course, don't take that as evidence that you don't have an eating disorder. If you truly can't stop an unhealthy habit and your obsessed with it, perhaps you do. That doesn't sound like the case to me though. I could be wrong.

I would recommend concentrating on health and exercise over calories. Calories are actually just a small part of what goes into how you look. Your body won't fully develop until you're in your early twenties. You're probably sacrificing your future, fully developed body for your current body image. Not getting the right amount of healthy food can seriously stunt certain physical developments, leaving you with health issues spanning your entire life, not to mention body image issues as an older person that you won't be able to fix with a change in diet.

You mentioned Sodium. It can be dangerous in large amounts, but it is important. Your body doesn't really produce sodium, but it needs it. So if you're watching your sodium intake, be sure to still at least get some regularly.

I don't think you need to see a doctor, but for the record, a doctor wouldn't force you to gain an obscene amount of weight. They would force you to eat enough so that your life wouldn't be in danger, but only if your life was in danger. Likely, they'd just leave you and your guardian(s) with strong recommendations for improving your overall health.

In short, I don't think you need to go to a doctor, but I advise you to consider the future more while making current choices involving your health.


So, im 22 female. my parents have been together for 30 years. Back when i was 15, I always caught my dad on porn sites or using a webcam.. too young to realize. when i was 18, i realized how much he was always leaving the house at night (my mom works nights) and the nights my mom didnt work he would be home. He would come home those nights acting weird, i knew something was up. I found him in a chat site, and in his search history a lot of searches for escorts, prostitutes, sex sites, etc like craigslist. It bothered me, knowing he was doing something behind my moms back and I knew, and disgusted me he was spending money on it. I tried to let my mom see the evidence by calling her nights he was out late when she was at work saying why isnt he home? Why does he have a webcam. The situation really bothered me knowing that I had this information that would break our family apart.

Anyways, I decided to completely forget about it as i moved to college, and hoped that he would change on his own or my mom would figure it out.

Here I am, almost 23, living at home finishing up my last year of college. When I went to his computer to print something off, I found a phone that isnt his primary phone, it was a prepaid phone. On it was texts to prostitutes named "trantran", and a guy with his full name listed, address, and sexual messages of plans of meeting up, what my dad wanted, what the other person wanted, when and where they would meet, and him saying he was on the way. There was about 3 visits to different people in a week... this obviously is a multiple times a week thing.

So, my dad is hooking up with "trans" and a guy, and i researched this guy based on his name and address he gave, and he is a !!!junior in highschool!!! This is something I cannot and will not forget, nor ignore.

To top it all off, I found this out 2 days ago, and 3 days ago my mom found out she might have breast cancer. So, here I am. Understanding my dad is rather gay, a sex addict, but do know hes cheating religiously on my mom and I am the only one who knows.

I can't tell my brother, him and my dad work together in their own business, and i dont want that stress to be put on my brother.
I told my boyfriend, he's helping as much as he can.

So what if I tell my mom, one, she is about to find out if she has cancer. Two, I feel like this decision, although I know this is not my fault, but this decision to tell her is heartbreaking because I am responsible for all the pain and stress she is about to go through. My whole family will fall apart, my grandparents aunts uncles and family friends will all be so mad etc. My dad will hate me for basically having all this information against him (I know that its his fault, yes, but still, i will have zero relationship after this). Who knows if he will hurt himself, run away, do something horrible.

What if I dont tell my mom. I feel guilty as hell knowing that she is being treated this way, having to lie to her, having so much anger to keep this horrible secret in because of him, but then again only I feel the pain of the situation if I dont tell. And my family goes on as is. Plus, my mom is supporting my family and my dad, as he is in debt from opening his store, yet he is spending money on sex..

What if I say something to my dad, how will he react, does he need help bc hes a sex addict or will he be embarrased bc maybe he is gay? Will he continue his ways, will he laugh in my face, will he hurt himself, will he run away, will he kill himself, will he really try and get help?

This situation is not my fault, but the outcome of this situation at this current moment is riding heavily in my hands.. i make the decision what to do, who to tell, what to say.. And i really just need help. No one, no one wants to find out their dad is this type of person, it RIPS me apart knowing he is cheating, lying, spending money on this, having sex with a high school student, knowing he must be sooo messed up in his head, must have such deep serious problems, be so wrapped up in this that he does it multiple times a week, comes home, lives a double life.

It tears me apart to know my mother, someone so sweet, caring, and giving, doesn't know, she doesn't deserve this, she will be CRUSHED, they have an upcoming vacation together. What if my dad gets caught by the police, what if my dad goes to jail, what if my dad is so emotionally messed up he has no idea what to do and feels alone, what if hes got so many problems he just ends up hurting himself. How do I sort these emotions out in my head, how do i make a decision, how do i deal with all of this..

any advice is helpful. (link)
I would confront your father. Tell him you know and tell him he needs to stop. For your mom's sake, for the family, and for himself. You don't want this spiraling out of control and him going to jail for being with a minor, so I would confront him soon. It's impossible to tell what he'll do, so you need to make sure that he knows you still love him, assuming you do. This will help prevent him from doing something dangerous as a reaction to what you tell him.

Your mother has a lot on her plate right now, so I would hold off on telling her until she's done dealing with the possibility of having cancer. Honesty is almost always the right way to go, but under these circumstances it may be too much emotional trauma for her.

You aren't responsible for anything concerning this situation. Your family is very fragile right now and bad things could happen, regardless of how you handle your own actions. No matter what, these things that may happen regarding your parents are not your fault. I think it's important that you understand that.


I'm 13 years old and in a few weeks I'm going to the doctors to talk about my anxiety. I'm afraid that if I get put on medication it'll change who I am, like I will start taking more risks and hurt myself. The alternative would be getting put in therapy but what does a therapist really do? I already talk about it to my mom and friends so how will talking to a therapist help? I'm just really nervous please answer if you could help me with any of these questions. Sorry for the lack of information, I had to do this quickly. Also please tell me have any ideas on how to bring up these topics my mom. Thanks! (link)
Calm down. You see a therapist to help you, not force you to be fixed. There's little to worry about.

The medication, if you get any, will help you relax. I don't think they will cause you to hurt yourself. And even if it is advised that you take medication, no one will force you to.

Talking to a therapist is different from talking to friends and your mother because your friends and your mother don't have the qualified experience and education concerning anxiety that a therapist has. Therapists can provide you with tips on how to help you handle your anxiety that your friends and your mother can't.

As for how to bring these things up to your mom, just tell her you have questions about seeing doctors or seeing a therapist for anxiety. If you have trouble putting thoughts together, I would try writing your thoughts down.


Hello,

I absolutely HATE bugs - If I see one, I automatically freak out and feel like I'm going to pass out. My brother has bed bugs and my mother has been visiting lately due to his daughter being ill, and I'm afraid of her bringing them back and getting to me. She shakes off her clothes really good before she gets in the house and washes them, but I'm terrified of getting them. My mother doesn't sit down or anything just in case, but I'm so paranoid. Do I have anything to worry about? My mother does her research on how to not bring them back and stuff like that, I just REALLY don't want to get them... (link)
Your fears are valid, so I wouldn't call you paranoid. Bed bugs are on the rise, easy to get, and almost impossible to get rid of without a professional who specializes with bedbugs. However, they carry no diseases, so they're essentially nothing more than a nuisance. I recently had to deal with them because of an infested mattress we recently purchased and I seem to have gotten rid of them, so it's not impossible. The trick is to eliminate them before they become an infestation.

Given your mother's research, I'd say your safe and have nothing to worry about. Bed bugs only come out to feed, then return to where they're hiding until they feed again. They only feed about once a week and tend to feed in a place where someone will often stay for long periods of time, so it's unlikely that your mother would bring them home.

If it makes you feel any better, there are other precautions you could take to ease your mind. When your mother washes her clothes after visiting, she can wash them on the highest setting to ensure the death of any bugs that might sneak by. You could get food grade Diatomaceous earth and put a generous layer on the floor around the legs of your bed. This will repel any possible bugs while you sleep and any that try to get through this barrier will die.


I'm a huge hypochondriac and I've gotten to where I can't run afford to run to the doctor unless I know there might be a problem.

The other night, I noticed a lump on the upper left side of my chest and there are certain things that bother me about it. I had a relative look at it and she's insisting that it's nothing but a rib. However, I've tried and tried and I can't find an identical lump on the opposite side of my chest, which there should be if it's a rib. Also, it feels slightly softer than a bone, it moves a little, and it hurts. Maybe a better word would be that's it's uncomfortable.

I've looked it up and, aside from cancer, it could be a sebaceous cyst or it could indeed be a bone. Should I get it looked at or am I making too much of this? (link)
No one can diagnose you here. You don't want us telling you it's fine when we simply can't know that for sure. Even if we were doctors, how accurate could our diagnosis be if we can't even see it.

If you want my advise, I would have it looked at. If you're convinced it's not your rib, a doctor might be the only one to convince you otherwise. It's better to be safe than sorry.

But I will say this. I am a hypochondriac as well and I worried myself over a rib. You can move them a bit, so they aren't firmly stationary. And if you do mess with them too much, they can get sore and uncomfortable. And are you sure it's not on the other side? Is there a chance that it just sticks out more than the other side does? No one's body is perfectly symmetrical.

Don't look anything up online, at least no more than you already have. What you're reading is likely a worst-case scenario, something that probably isn't the case. Even if it was a lump, it's probably nothing life-threatening. Looking for answers online could make you far more anxious than you need to be.

Odds are you're fine, but to know for sure go ask your doctor.


So there is this guy ( Im 13 btw ) and he told a few of my friends that he likes me. He told them he was going to ask me out today, but he got to scared so he didn't. He told them he was going to ask me out monday. I don't know what to say. I like him i just want to know do i say yes or sure? and another thing, how do i make it less awkward? I want to talk to him, but in a fun, flirtish kind of way... help! (link)
Yes is better than sure, because it's more absolute. Sure kind of sounds like, "I guess," less certain. So I would go with yes.

I imagine since both of you are so nervous, neither of you are sure what to do next. To make things less awkward, try to think of what to do next and talk about it. Is it going to see a movie? Going to a halloween party perhaps? Talk about things such as these.


I have been dating a guy for 2 years. Throughout this time we have had our ops and downs and I have also found out he is a compulsive liar. A few months ago he started a new job at a restaurant and has been hanging out with some of his coworkers for drinks/pool on the weekends. One of his coworkers seems to have taken interest in him. I have his instagram login and she just recently asked to befriend him on there. Well after he accepts that, he deleted the pictures with me in them. I ask him about it and he claims he deleted more pictures (he didn't) and plans to delete his instagram (don't believe it). I believe he deleted my pictures so his coworker wouldn't see them. Just two days ago he tells me he is going to shoot some pool with "the guys from work". Come to find out, he went to a bar with this girl for her birthday. The fact that he lied about who he was with leads me to believe something is going on. I actually texted the other girl and she claims there is nothing going on between them and they're just coworkers but did apologize for the feelings she has for him. I want to believe her but my gut tells me otherwise. He has done this type of thing before (gone behind my back and seen other women). I want to end the relationship because I don't trust him and I feel dumb to stick around again. What would you do? We are 24/25 if that matters. (link)
If you can't trust him, I would leave him.


I think my guy loves me but sometimes I think like he doesn't even care..he talks to his so called sisters and he doesn't have time for me..he sends messages and
pictures to his so called sisters but he doesn't have time to reply me..and whenever I try to spend some quality time with him he just get busy with his games or movie..i don't have any idea what should I do..we never had any kind of official date till now..I really love him..but I think our thought doesn't match..I can't even stay without him..i can't let him go from my life..and he always cares about his friend more than me..and the main thing is,we are in living relation..I have never been so much addicted of something.
(link)
Sometimes it's hard to see how much you're negatively affecting someone until they tell you. So I don't think he understands how hurt you are from this lack of attention. Before you break it off, let him know that you feel left out. Tell him what you feel you need out of the relationship, because he probably doesn't know. Be specific. Make compromises. Don't make decisions based on assumptions, because they could be wrong. It's true that your thoughts don't match, so vocalize them until you both reach an understanding.


I'm having constant fights with my best friend. We've been friends for 3 years. All the previous school year and this summer we were seeing each other every day. We were inseparable. Now this school year started and I got a boyfriend. We've been unofficial for a few months and now for half a month we're official. I believe that she is jealous cause she is single for over a year and that she doesn't want to lose me as a friend. But she is showing it wrong. She keeps making scenes of jealousy, she won't talk to me, she is not even calling me to hang out anymore. I only see her at school. I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose her as a friend but she needs to understand that she's not right and that even though I have a boyfriend I still love her and she's my best friend. What should I do? (link)
It sounds like she needs reassurance. I would explain to her that you love her, because regardless of how obvious it might seem, she might not know. I would tell her that you'll make time to hang out if she wants that and then do it. While having a boyfriend changes things for you, it won't change what she means to you. Let her know that.

I wouldn't discuss what she's done wrong at all. That might aggravate the hurt feelings she seems to already feel, making things worse. You might feel tempted to point it out because you're right and she's in the wrong, but salvaging the friendship is the end goal here. Not proving who is right and who is wrong.


I'll try to make this quick. Back in August, I started seeing a guy called RW. I thought he was great at first, but then he turned out to be not so nice. At least that's how I feel. I feel like there's a lot I'd like you to know about RW, but all you really need to know is that I wasn't very happy most of the time I was seeing him. I felt a lot better when I started thinking about breaking it off in September.

Long story short, in September, two guys from my past came back into my life. Their names are Robert and Jude and I've had crushes on them both (Robert in 2010 and 2011 and Jude in 2011). I started seeing them both a little over three weeks ago and simultaneously broke it off with RW.

They both have so many qualities that I just adore. They're both extremely handsome, sweet, good hearted guys that make me feel so good and happy when I'm with them. Jude is so charming I could cry and Robert is so funny and so sweet I can't stand it. They both have a lot of the same qualities I thought RW did, but theirs kindness, sweetness, charm, good looks, and senses of humor are much more my style.

I know it's kind of skeezy to see two guys at the same time, but I was trying to decide between them and now, I'm pretty sure it's gonna be Robert. Now we get to my problem. RW will not go away. I was hoping that the break up would be the end of things, but he keeps showing up everywhere. He showed up at an art walk we went to, a he showed up Saturday when I went to a movie with Robert, he showed up yesterday uninvited to a friend's birthday celebration. He Won't go away. He's not letting go of our relationship.

RW has problems that I didn't know the severity of back in August. He has some kind of mental disorder and a bad drinking issue. He's not above using violence (or at least he doesn't seem to be) and I'm a little worried about what he's capable of. I don't think he'd physically hurt Robert or Jude, but it wouldn't be the first time he'd hurt someone. He can do nothing to me because I've got tons of men in my family and group of friends who'd kick his @$$.

What should I do? I need this guy out of my life and away from me Robert and Jude. (link)
This is all still recent, it'll take a bit of time for RW to get over the role he had as a boyfriend. If this is all intentional, and it sounds like it is to me, then what he wants is attention from you. I wouldn't give it to him. Once he's learned that he can't get anything from you, he'll likely move on. If he doesn't, depending on how old you are, you'll either want to get your parents or police involved. The police probably won't do anything from lack of evidence towards any foul play, but it might be enough to scare him off.


Is it a bad idea if I invite another female into my bed to spice up our sex like since I can't perform like I used to before my illness! I love to please my husband but it's hard to at this point! Would my marriage brake if I do. Need help please! We have been together for 15yrs and married for 10yrs. I'm a 36 year old abd my husband just turned 40 years old. (link)
The short answer: Given your long history, I think your relationship would endure even if you found yourself hurt by this arrangement, but at the same time your husband's enjoyment out of it might not be worth the pain you feel in the long run. Unless you're into it, I wouldn't do it.

The long answer: Do you find yourself ever jealous of your husband's attraction to other women (if the attraction is evident)? Do you think you're capable of being turned on or in any way excited by your husband being with another woman?

If you aren't the jealous type and can get something out of this arrangement, go for it.
But if you think you could be jealous and won't get anything out of it, perhaps you shouldn't. Keep in mind, the thought of a spouse with someone else hits someone a lot softer than actually seeing and knowing that it's happening. You can't accurately know how it'll feel until you go through it.

A big reason (but certainly not the only reason) why people are hurt when it comes to a spouse cheating on them is a strong fear of being replaced, devalued. Of course, what you're talking about isn't cheating, but I would guess there's a strong chance of you feeling the same fear of being replaced, especially given your inability to perform the way you used to. That feeling will cause far more damage than good in your relationship.

Sex is fun and some could argue that it's important in fresh relationships, but it's far from everything. After 15 years, I'm sure you're husband realizes this and what you can do for him may be enough. Still, I can understand wanting to replace what is missing, so I would advice trying to spice things up in other ways before involving another person. Toys, role-playing, anything new that might appeal to either of you.

That is unless you don't have a jealous bone in your body and/or can get some excitement out of the arrangement yourself. But that's rare.


21/f

Before I start, please do not tell me about the safety of having sex (using condoms to prevent pregnancy, to prevent getting STDs, even if you're on birth control pills, etc.) I am aware of all of these things.

Let me say that my boyfriend and I do not use condoms. We did at first, but I have been on birth control for the past three years. We are also both STD free.

So, my situation is I went through my boyfriend's wallet trying to get a hint of what I should get him for his birthday. His wallet didn't have many things in it and I found a condom. I got to thinking, if we don't usually use condoms, why would he carry one around with him? I thought maybe he forgot about it before he met me or he wanted to be safe just in case? But just in case what? Just in case another girl comes along that he wants to sleep with doesn't give me much of a reassurance.

I just want to understand why or the possibility of him having it would do. I know that if I got him a new wallet, he'll put another condom in it, too. I'm curious on what the purpose may be. Am I thinking too much into it? Should I even be worried about this? (link)
It could be old, it could be for someone else. There's no way to know just on this fact. Are there any other signs that something is wrong?

It's best not to worry about it, if you can. There's no point in stressing over it prematurely. There will be plenty of time for that if and when you confront him about it.

If you can't let it go, ask him about it at some point. He might have it with someone else in mind, he might not.


i thought i had feelings for this guy but hes getting clingy and now i dont think i like him as much... i feel like telling him that would make him think i lead him on.. maybe i did in a way, but i cant help how i feel. i care about this guy but maybe not enough for any kind of relationship.. i dont know what to do and i need advice.. i dont want to hurt him (link)
First and foremost, you didn't lead him on. You felt a certain way and acted accordingly, but things are different now. Things change with people all the time. It's unfortunate for him, but you didn't lead him on.

The way I see it, you have two choices. You can either tell him you aren't interested or you can try to distance yourself and drop hints that you aren't interested. He might be hurt a bit more by telling him, but dropping hints will make the process take longer and therefore cause him to suffer for a longer period of time.

It's up to you, but I advise being direct. It seems you care about him quite a bit, enough to want to spare his feelings. It might soften the blow if you reassure him that you care and you don't want to hurt him. Make sure he knows that he's a person of value to you, if that makes sense, you just don't feel the same way he seems to feel.


Hi! So my boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months (both juniors in HS). We are both each other's first boyfriend/girlfriend. Things are pretty good. We get along well and we always have fun, but the physical aspect of our relationship is lacking. It took him 4 1/2 months to kiss me and now I'm ready for a little more (like making out or something) but he hasn't taken any initiative. I don't know what to do. Like he's affectionate in front of our friends (always makes a point to be by me, holds my hand, has his arm around me, ect). But when we are alone he doesn't even try anything. Is there something wrong with me? He always says how beautiful I am and stuff but he never tries anything. What should I do?? SOS (link)
You're his first girlfriend, so he's naturally nervous. Making a move on your first significant other is a scary thing to do, because you don't know exactly what you're doing. I don't think it has anything to do with being unattractive. In fact, his attraction to you probably makes him even more nervous about taking initiative.

I would keep him informed about what you're ok with. Let him know that you're open to doing more. If you're up to it, consider making the move yourself.


What websites should I use? I already have a twitter, a facebook account, and some others. But I want a real blog though. (link)
tumblr.com is the most famous and the one I often use. I've heard good things about wordpress.com as well.


I'm the owner of Sin City Escorts Las Vegas. You can view our girls at http://www.escortslasvegasnv.com.

I've been wondering how many people that are not in the adult industry view this as a bad thing. Some of my girls have complained before about not always wanting to work as an escort because of some of the clients. Girls are always free do go as they please so it isn't anything like that. I would like to know how people view Las Vegas escorts and the adult industry? (link)
Oh yes. I entirely believe that the owner of Sin City Escorts Las Vegas came to a site called advicenators and asked a poorly phrased question concerning the morality of the adult industry.

You have too much time on your hands, kid, spambot, whatever you are.




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