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Hey , I'm from Poland , and there is this girl who i knew over the internet , but she lives nearby, and she wanted some serious advice.Anyway , i gave her advice and afterwards she wanted help with her homework and i helped her.Every problem she faced , she seeked advice from me , So i thought we were like brother and sister and i said ,why not ? , but after a couple of days , she was like i love you so much.That was so weird and random , i mean we barely know each other. i don't know what to do , she loves me and she wants marriage , but i'm just being nice ,i don't wanna be rude.To be honest , shes doesn't have the looks i want. hhhh , please help me. (link)
For one thing, it's perfectly valid that you don't share the same feelings. Regardless of how physically attractive you are to her, you probably aren't going to be in love with someone you barely know.

You want to be nice and probably want what's best for her. Just be honest with her. Explain that you simply don't feel that way about her. She likely won't react well to this, but it truly is what's best for her.


14/f and I get these huge pimples on the back of my shoulders every once in a while. They're painful and big and I can't wear a lot of clothing while I have one. How do I get rid of them? (link)
There are creams for ordinary acne, like Benzoyl or Neutrogena oil, that you can use. You can find these at any store with a pharmacy, like Walgreens or Wal-Mart. With ordinary acne, it's also helpful to make sure you scrub your shoulders with anti-bacterial soap. I would also try limiting food that's high in sugar or greasy. Some things work better for different people.

Unfortunately, sometimes people get acne that is more severe than your ordinary acne. In these cases, it's something you should see your doctor about in order to get rid of it.


I am a 25 year old female and I don't know what's wtong with me. I akready go to pineland 3 says a week on meds and I am still having problem s with my mental health. I am real emotional all time like for instance one minute ill be all hyper and happy and the next I will be agitated and ready to come unglued over every little thike like for instance I came home from pineland to find that my niece had stuff all over my bed and I snapped but stugf lack that dosnt usually bother me and I bursted into tears anf told her to get out of my site. Why would I cry over something like that. When I was in group today and I was reading some material I noticed that I kept getting lost in mid sentence and the sentenceskept running together and couldn't concentrate. Like I said I am already on celexa f or anxiety and depression and I am on adderall for adhd but why am I getting mad so easy because I've never had problems with anger before and ehy does my moods keep switching like a light switch that's never happened and for the past month I have been crying for ehat seems to be no reason at all why? (link)
Your depression is changing. Are these side effects of any medication you're taking? If not, it just seems to be another phase of your depression. It sounds like you might have bipolar disorder, which is another name for manic depression. Explain this to whoever you go to about your mental health. It might be that the medication you are taking isn't exactly the medication you need.


So I am a 19 year old girl from Europe who moved to LA last June.
I met a guy the first week I came here and eventually we started dating. He's 23 from around LA and unfortunately in a gang.

Just so we're clear, I am not one of those girls who looks for danger and would intentionally date a gang member. It just happened.

I just recently told my parents I've been seeing someone for a little over a year and that I'm in love. They don't know anything about him, just his name.
The thing is, I know how they would react if I told them what he does. I know how every parent would react..
He's really a great guy and never put me in danger

So basically I'm just looking for advice on how to tell my parents about him. Or should I not mention some things ? (link)
You asked if you should not mention some things. Why do you ask this? If you're wondering what the morally right thing to do is, it isn't that. Being honest is the right thing to do. That and trying to convince your boyfriend to take on a more socially acceptable job and/or breaking up with him. To me and most other people, these are the right things to do.

If you're asking what would be easiest on you, the harsh truth is you're going to have to be dishonest. You're going to have to do the wrong thing in order to maintain any sort of civility between your family and your boyfriend. There's no way to phrase "I've been dating a member of a gang for over a year" in such a way that will get a good reaction. No matter what you say, regardless of how great a guy he is, you seem to already know what the reaction will be.

So you've only two options. Be honest and suffer the repercussions or be dishonest and deal with the guilt that comes with it. You have to decide what's right for yourself, but I would personally be honest with them. Big secrets like this tend to have a way of coming out in the open at some point anyway.


15/f
I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend and we used a condom but after a little bit the condom slipped off and we didn't notice but when we did we stopped immediately and put one on. Can there still be a big chance of pregnancy? He had already cummed before we had sex & didn't cum during or after sex is there still a big chance of me being pregnant? (link)
Is there a big chance? No, the chances are very small, but there is still a small chance.

Are you aware of emergency contraception? It can take up to 6 days for the sperm and the egg to meet and the morning-after pill prevents the ovaries from releasing and egg as quickly as usual. You can take such a pill up to 5 days after the condom slips off, though after a few days the pill won't be as effective.

You can get these pills at clinics like Family Planning or Planned Parenthood. I would find out what clinics are close for future reference should something like this happen again.


I'm a 15 year old female and I'm a Christian. I grew up in a Baptist church, though my family isn't baptist nor are we nearly as strict and legalistic as some Christians.

I am homeschooled and my workbooks/PACE'S(ACE Curriculum) sometimes have stories and/or comics of kids in different situations and teach Christian morality and thinking.

But as I was reading one of these stories, it was about a girl who became Christian and it was talking about how she was changing her life. One of the things it mentioned was: "She began to find new joy as she replaced her former friends and ways with new Christian friends and activity's that helped her grow spiritually."

I understand having new Christian friends and distancing herself from bad things like drugs and alcohol. But why would she need to remove her old friends from her life? Didn't Jesus sit and eat with the non-Christians and sinners?

Wouldn't we WANT to be friends with them so we could possibly influence them in a good way instead of cutting them off?

I guess I just don't understand why you would do that...

Could someone explain this to me? Or tell me if I'm right and their wrong? Or the other way around? (link)
You are correct. Someone doesn\'t need to stop being friends just because of their change in religious beliefs. It seems to imply that her former friends were a bad influence on her Christian morals, but that\'s not always the case.


I recently found out one of my friends has bed bugs. I sleep over at her place often so when I found out she had them I was freaked out. (I know cleanliness is not necessarily a factor) Since her house is practically like mine too I need some advice on how to get rid od them.

She said:
- none of her roomates have any signs of them in their rooms
-NOT an infestation...yet
-She has used some sort of powder to get rid of them

We already known some tips on how to get rid of them but if anyone has advice to offer that would be helpful (link)
If she's noticed some, she may have an infestation. Use Diatomaceous earth to create barriers around sleeping areas by creating a small mound around bed legs. She'll probably want to do the same to any dressers or any other place they can hide, which is just about anywhere. Make sure it's food grade Diatomaceous earth. She'll want to unscrew just about everything on the walls, all the outlets light switch covers, etc, and place some Diatomaceous earth inside.

What Diatomaceous earth does is it cuts their bodies, causing them to dehydrate and die, but it can take a number of days. Food grade is pretty much harmless to people. I should note that it isn't easy to clean diatomaceous earth. It might damage vacuums, so I wouldn't go crazy with it.

Carpet can be an issue as that provides almost limitless hiding places for the bedbugs. She might want to get rid of whatever carpet she has. Wash any clothes and blankets on the highest heat setting you can without damaging anything. She might want to buy certain mattress covers to keep bedbugs out or to trap the bedbugs trapped inside.

If you want to use pesticides, Phantom and Gentrol I've heard are good choices. Many bedbugs have developed an immunity to common pesticides, even those labelled as bedbug killers. Gentrol will prevent bedbugs from reproducing, Phantom will kill them. This can take several days. These insecticides aren't repellents, which makes it more efficient. They won't be afraid to get in this stuff, so don't use it thinking it'll drive them away.

There's a homemade bedbug trap she can make pretty easily. This doesn't capture all bedbugs. This is largely just to see if she still has them. Each night for a week or so, she'll want to set this up near the bed. Get a dog dish and place it upside down so that there\'s a canyon that they'll fall into. You'll want to rub a bit of talcum powder (some baby powders are just 100% talcum powder) in this part so it'll be harder for them to escape. On the outside, you'll want to rough up the edge or tape paper to it so they can climb into it. At the center of the dish, you'll want a Thermos full of dry ice. You can find some videos of this on youtube by searching "bedbug dry ice trap" for easier instructions. You'll probably want to do this twice to make sure. If she goes through a few of months without being bit, she probably got them all. It's not easy though and this isn't a certainty. Bedbugs can survive for several months without eating.

As for you, you'll want to check inside everything before you get home. Any bags, the lining of anything you bring home. Bedbugs usually only come out when they're feeding, so you probably aren't bringing them home, but if you are it's almost impossible to get rid of them.

If she can afford it, it's probably less stressful to just have professionals handle it, though many aren't experienced at properly handling bedbugs and it may require multiple treatments.

If she rents an apartment, she should find out what her landlord's policies are regarding pests before she really does anything. Her landlord might be obligated to get rid of them.


So Im 16 ive been with this guy for months. And I really like him. But lately everythings been off. We haven't talked in weeks. So I mssged my ex telling him I still like him. Which I do. And then it hit me that my bf might be busy, so now im not sure what I should do. Because im panicking. My boyfriennd has been my guy bestfriend for years, I would hate to lose him because I messed up. :( pls help. (link)
Yes, you\'ve made a mistake. What you need to do is decide if you can live with telling him or not. Of course, being completely honest is the right thing to do. But telling the guy your seeing what you\'ve done will likely kill the relationship. If you want to maintain the current relationship, you\'ll probably have to hide this fact. Could you live with this? Personally, I couldn\'t keep something like that to myself. If I were in that situation, I\'d probably end things with the guy you\'re currently seeing.

This is assuming there\'s a relationship at all. You haven\'t heard from him in weeks and you\'ve only been dating for months. Find out where you stand with him. Call him and ask him why you haven\'t heard from him, then go from there.


I'm friendzoned by a friend. We are really close to each other and one time when her boyfriend left her I was by her side when she was really hurt and sad. And now she said that she is now looking for another love. And I volunteered but of course I made it a joke cuz I'm afraid I might be rejected. But then she said I must nit volunteer because she doesn't want to lose me cuz she treasures me as her brother. Wtf? I really like her and loved her but she just think me as her brother. Please help (link)
Honestly, she\'s probably just not into you. You can\'t activate her romantic interest by acting distant and trying to make her long for you. It just doesn\'t work that way. What you\'ll accomplish is her confused, hurt feelings. This\'ll probably lead to a confrontation that\'ll be difficult for either of you to handle.

You are her friend, right? So I\'m assuming her friendship is valuable and not seen as just a tedious step toward relationshipland. If that\'s true, I\'d just let it go and be there for her. No tricks or attempts at manipulation. Maybe she\'ll have a change of heart later on, but I seriously doubt it. No one can simply choose or change who they\'re attracted to.


Okay so im 14/f and since i was 11 ive identified as a lesbian (that was when i figured it out) but now im starting to question myself. I know im definitely not straight, 0% chance, and i highly doubt bisexual, i dont know it just doesnt quite feel right, neither does pansexual but it does sound closer to what im looking for. Im romantically and sexually attracted to girls, but sometimes i meet a boy, (and when i say sometimes i mean this has happened twice in the past 3 years) and im just like, "You. You are sweet and really cute and i want to be really close with you and hug you but i cant necessarily see myself with you or anything" but its just confusing me bc it *feels* pretty freaking similar to a crush but im just not attracted to boys?? I dont think I am?? I feel like I might be maybe homosexual and panromantic? does that sound right or am i just confused with all the labels? Thank you in advance to anyone who helps (link)
It is what it is. Attachments can feel similar to crushes because you find yourself thinking of said person a lot in both situations. That doesn\'t mean you want a romantic relationship with them. Maybe you just want them as a very close friend. Maybe you want intimacy from them. Maybe you are a lesbian. It\'s difficult to say.

Pinning oneself to a label is a common issue. People want to be able to say, \"I am ___sexual\" and a lot of people can, but it\'s not always that easy. People often don\'t fit into the little boxes that labels provide and that\'s OK. People also find themselves strictly falling into a certain label and suddenly realizing that they\'ve changed and the label no longer suits them. That\'s OK, too.

I agree with the others. Don\'t stress about putting a name to what you are right now. No feelings are wrong.


21/f, he's 27/m

I met this guy, he's 27. We expressed interest in each other when we first met (but it was online). I was nervous about meeting him in person at first because I felt like I would be too young or too naive for him. I know that's not right for me to assume but I guess that's just how I feel.

After our first in-person meeting, I realized how much we had in common and he makes me smile, in the longest time, I was actually nervous. And even afterward, he seemed to actually still expressed interest in me but I can't help but have doubts in my head.

For example, I have an older sister that is a year younger than he is and even though she has a boyfriend, I sometimes fear that if he ever met her, he may like her instead just because she's closer to his age. Another is that our lifestyle is different. I obviously still live with my parents and I'm trying to get into graduate school; whereas, he already has a career going.

I have already had two relationships that has ended because my lifestyle and my family issues was "too much to handle." (Money issues, parents aren't getting along, etc.) My mom thought my last relationship ended because my boyfriend's parents didn't like the fact that we made less money than they did. Maybe that's why I may have doubts in my head?

He's aware that I have a 26 year old sister and he still seems to "like" me, I guess? He said he wanted to see me again but I'm afraid to appear in front of him, even afraid to show him my car just because of our lifestyle is so different.

Doubts in my mind. Maybe I'm not good enough? (link)
21 and 27 aren\'t that different. And if they were, it would be because you\'re of a more transitional age, where people tend to change. In that case, he would be the one worried that you would leave.

You are good enough. These fears you have would only be a factor if the person you were with wasn\'t worth your time. Maturity doesn\'t have an age limit and only jerks think money is a factor in someone\'s worth.


My boyfriend and I are in our mid-twenties. We have been together for about a year and a half and I've never had a reason to feel like I can't trust him. Yesterday evening, he went to bed and left his phone laying out on the counter. Now, looking into each other's phones is something we promised we'd never do. Neither of us get jealous easily and we've always gotten along SO well because we're both laid back.

Well, what I found hurt me a lot. There were two different girls that he had been texting from time to time over the course of the past few months. With one girl, he would text her randomly and tell her that she looked beautiful in her new Facebook photo, and then a few weeks later he would say that he wished he could come see her. The other girl, he'd call her sweet names and he said he'd be off work for a few days and thought that they should meet up. From what I could tell, he never met up with either of them. But seeing him flirt and sweet talk other girls hurts so bad and I don't accept that. Plus, if he's willing to say those things, what else has he done that I wouldn't find in his phone?

I don't know what to do. I don't put up with cheating but if it IS just words in a message, it is different from physical cheating but still is a betrayal of my trust. What I don't understand is that our whole relationship has felt like it's in that "honeymoon" stage. I've never felt like he's been unhappy at any point. We constantly have so much fun together and have rarely had even the smallest of arguments. He brags about me to all of his friends, his family loves me, we've made plans for our future... and then I discover he texts random girls every once in a while. They're never ongoing conversations but still very inappropriate.

I left him while he was sleeping and went back to my own house. Since then we've briefly discussed the situation but I really don't want to talk to him because there's nothing he can say to justify what he's done. He keeps apologizing and saying how bad he feels, and that he'd never actually cheat on me, the texts are just an ego boost for him and he only sends them when he's drunk, that's why he quits replying. It makes sense, but at the same time, I will not tolerate cheating and I'm just hurt so bad that I feel like I will always have doubts in the back of my mind.. but beside this situation, we are SOOOO good together and I don't want to throw that away. (link)
Flirting is not cheating. Flirting can be anything from this to a certain kind of smile given to a waitress in a coffee shop.

That\'s not to say what he did was harmless. What matters is how well he understood how you feel. Did he think that it would upset you if you ever found out about the texts? Probably, therefore he did something wrong.

I would give him a second chance, but not a third. It seems likely that he was telling the truth and this was just an ego boost without any attachment for the other two women. That\'s something to keep in mind. The type of connection that you two share isn\'t shared with these other women. Really, the type of connection you describe isn\'t commonly found in general, so I would put forth the effort to keep it.


May a girl get pregnent if i enject sperm in her hips hole (link)
Yes.


I'm 15 and my friends(a little older than me) have been dating all that stuff.
I'm homechooled,and I live in a really small town so I don't really know any guys, and I really don't have much of a desire to date.

My family is Christian(I even live across the street from my church) and conservative.
I was wondering about when I have a boyfriend. I would have no idea what to do since I've never dated before, And considering that my freinds have already done sexual things, I'm worried he'd pressure me.

I would much rather wait to lose my virginity(preferably till marrage),I don't want a relationship to be all about sex and making out and stuff, I want it to be like we're best friends and all I really need is a guy who is nice, has a sense of humor, and treats me well.

I don't know...I guess I'm just afraid that when I do get a boyfriend he'll try to pressure me to do stuff I'm not ready for and I might not be able to say no... I'm really shy and I just don't know how to talk to guys either... (link)
Your fears are valid as this does happen. First and foremost, someone who pressures you into doing something they know you don't want to do is at fault, not you.

To clear up misunderstandings, tell your future boyfriend what you aren't comfortable with at the beginning of the relationship. Explain that you don't want to have sex until you're married. Make sure he knows what would cross the line. After this, if he tries to pressure you, it should be easier to turn him down as that would be a complete lack of respect. If he doesn't respect you, he's not worth it.

If you can't bring yourself to do this and you know that you might cave under pressure, then you might not be ready for a relationship. Wait until you're comfortable expressing yourself. Not having a boyfriend for awhile is a lot better than living with regret.


Boyfriend 20m
Me 18f
Little siblings are 8 and 9

I'm gonna say that I need advice on understanding if I'm in love because there's a side of me that always says yes and other says no. My boyfriend loves me completely he is willing to do anything to make me happy, but I have doubts that go through my head because whenever I see his flaws I end up getting really annoyed by him and when we hang out all he wants is to kiss me I like it but there's times where I don't, it just gets old and so do his jokes:/ I know that only I can fix my emotions and figure them out but I have this feeling of braking up with him whenever I don't like something maybe I'm selfish or something I don't really mean to though. in the beginning I really loved him and we even agreed to just be friends for 2 weeks but I end up giving in with his nice honest words he says that he thinks I'm gorgeous and he can't keep it in and wants to be more so bad. I love it when he's like that but when I go back with him I'm scared of having these doubts about it again. Maybe I might need space from him but when I do get it I really miss him because he's like my best friend pretty much no one would ever hang with me so many times like he did. But when we are friends it gets really hard to fake it. I don't know what to feel.. Does it have to do with the my mind says no and my heart says yes or the other way around... I've been with him for almost 2 years. I do have much going on at home my mother is a single mother with a boyfriend that's nice but she struggles a lot with my little siblings. But that's not part of it I'm just saying I got stuff going on and i don't know if it has to do with my emotions with my boyfriend... Me and my boyfriend meet in high school and we talked on the phone for a long time before hanging out we would talk about how bad his depression was and I would always be there to help because I knew how it felt too. He was my first kiss and I was his by then we always hanged out we did kind of went fast in the relationship because I was never honest with me or with him because I didn't know if I wanted to be with him I mean I had a huge crush on him but I wasn't sure of dating him but when he told me he liked me and wanted to date I said yes even though I wasn't sure. In the beginning it was perfect but then I hated how he would be forgetful yes I know guys are like that but it wasn't that hard to forget something about us hanging out you know but whatever I will never forget how bad I held in when he didn't arrive for our 1 year anniversary because some girl was asking to meet up because she had problems and stuff well that's it guys I just need advice thanks... (link)
I wouldn't consider this love. But does that mean you should break up with your boyfriend? It's hard to say.

As far as his faults go, keep in mind that no one is perfect. Even people in seemingly perfect relationships have doubts on occasion. You aren't going to find a relationship without issues. At the beginning of most relationships, both people are too self conscious to be their true selves. Because of this, you don't really see their faults until later on. And considering how strong initial infatuation can be, it's easy to think that your significant other is perfect at the beginning of a relationship. They aren't. People are too different for a perfect relationship to be realistic, so I wouldn't use small annoyances as a reason to break up with someone.

At the same time, if you are generally unhappy with someone, it's best to end the relationship. People often change and grow less compatible as a result.

Also keep in mind that missing someone when you break up doesn't necessarily mean that you should stay together. People often miss someone that's wrong for them just because of how accustomed they were to the relationship. Even a good change can be painful.

How does he make you feel in a general sense? When he first pops into your head, is it a nice feeling? It sounds to me like your relationship has run its course and you'd find more fulfillment elsewhere, but it goes without saying that only you know for sure.


I am looking to upgrade my dvd player to a blue ray player, but I am confused about a couple things. Will the blue ray thing also play dvds or do I need to keep my dvd player also? Another thing is that there are SO many choices for players that I don't know which one I should get. Can you give me any advice or at least tell me which brand/model you have and how you like it or hate it?

Thank you all so very much! (link)
I bought a Sony, which was cheap and does its job fine, though there are probably better ones out there with higher price tags.

They play DVD's as well, so you don't have to worry about that. It even plays your DVD's with better quality than your usual DVD player.


I have been living by my ideas of love, comedy ,and how to live life which has served me well up till now. Now I have had a really bad day and I was sad(feeling like I've been forcing myself to talk too people and from the few people I did talk to I can basically read that there saying I'm being awakward aka forcing myself to talk) but a friend cheered me up a good amount (I've learned she has a crazy side so I'm liking her more). About an hour ago I stared feeling bad for no reason so I started to take a look at a good look at myself and started to think about how I intreact with some of my lady friends and some people in general . (no idea how this came about) Oddly a couple of lady friends I have talked with each other and agreed I am a flirt (This took place in a chat room).So one day I asked my girlfriend and she agreed that I was a flirt so I embraced her and said no matter how much I flirt she IS my number one. so apparently I am a flirt , however I do have a code with what I'm doing (I'm not looking to cheat im looking more to play and\or get a rise out of them)and honestly its the only way I know to fluently talk with women (generally), it's fun, and I think the women I "flirt" with enjoy the teasing and niceness (none of the compliments are ever empty).In all honesty I forgot what my question was but I do like to hear some opinions about what you think.

And as a pre-strike to some people:no have never cheated nor will I ever do it I prefer to talk out what's bugging me and see if my other has an issue and if those issues can't be resolved I would rather end the relationship and say thank you for being so nice and such. Not an a joke like some people can be.

Also yes my girlfriend is real.
(link)
It's good you have a code to live by. The only thing to be aware of is making sure your girlfriend shares that same code. I'm not saying you're doing anything wrong. I'm just saying make sure you're fully aware of what your girlfriend is ok with while you flirt with other people.


So me 17and my boyfriend 18 have been dating for 1 year.He decited he wanted to try anal.which I agreed to but the only problem was he couldn't get it in and ended up raming it on my butt but he didn't get it in.we are both virgins and have no Idea what to do so if someone could help me and tell me how it works that would be great.Also what's your opinion on anus because I have no idea on how it feels. (link)
Don't do it if you aren't comfortable with the thought of doing it. If you feel you are absolutely ready and comfortable with it, don't start with his penis first. Work your way up to it by starting with his finger. And if you find that too uncomfortable, don't do it. Follow the advice of Dragonflymagic.

Really, I advise not doing it at all on the premise that he's a virgin and lacks the experience to know what he's doing. There could be serious problems if he doesn't know exactly what he's doing.


I am a 42 yr old male from Asia. Recently i met a woman of my dreams and we've been together for 2 months already. The problem came when she started telling me about her previous sex life before me and she confessed that she loves sex and has slept with over a hundred men (she is 30 by the way) since age 18 (including men she pick at at clubs/bars, strangers, friends, gigolos). While I am no spring chicken myself having bedded more than 150 women in my life, what bothers me was all this happen for me during my younger days and after awake up call, i stopped all my "activities" at 27 while she openly admitted that she cheated on her ex just 2 months before we got together because she wanted to break off with him but yet still had sex with her ex on the day of break up. Also, she keeps telling me that she enjoys having threesomes with two men all the time. Not to mention, she told me that if we were ever to split up, the first thing she will do is pack her bags for a holiday and go find herself a couple of gigolos. Yet, at the same time, i can't say she is not devoted to me as she really takes care of me well (physically and mentally). Things got to a high when i spoke to her a couple of days back when I told her i was pretty "shameful" about my past as I realize what i did in the past was nothing to be proud of. She in turn accused me of trying to make her feel guilty and shameful and she retorted that she is not the least bit "shameful" about it and if the chance arises she will do it again (after we break off that is). furthermore, she added that she ever slept with 6 different men in six days consecutively. Every time we broach on this subject, she will always have new things added like how she told me that even during the time i was courting her, she had 3 different sex partners waiting at her beck and call. She also said that i was only acting to make her feel shameful when I told her i wasn't and that I was really uncomfortable with my past. She keep displaying the "sex is just sex, love is love" kind of attitude which really sometimes make me feel really uncomfortable. Also, the thought has crossed my mind that some of the men she had sex with might be friends or acquaintances of mine. Now, as a guy in conservative Asia, who likes to hear his own friends say that I had bonked your girlfriend before" or "your girlfriend is a slut or whore where anybody can bonk her"? She even sometimes tell me in details about how she had sex with the different men in her life. I know I am in no position to question her as I myself was such before and it really didn't really bother me anyway, but to me now, I can't decide if she really is promiscuous and is our relationship really only based on sex as the primary issue? I need advice or opinions on really how to handle the issue. (link)
The past isn't important. What someone would hypothetically do if the relationship should end isn't important. Almost none of this is important.

My advice is to let it all go. You are negatively effected by some of the things she says? Explain that it makes you uncomfortable and ask her to stop sharing. Honestly, this relationship sounds rocky and will take some effort. Obsessing over things that happened or that might happen could cause you to sabotage it. It can create problems that aren't even there. Don't assume the relationship is based on sex. Don't assume the worst. Just try to enjoy what you have while you have it.


Thanks for helping… I am a 21 year old Female. I met a guy in the Army online almost a year ago. We have met before; however majority of our relationship has been long distance. He is in Hawaii and I am in Florida. He has 3 more years in his contract and he hopes to reenlist.
My dilemma is that I want to move to Hawaii and be with him and hopefully get married one day. WHAT IS STOPPING ME? 1. I just got accepted to a master’s program to become a teacher. Long story short, we stopped communicating for a while and I tried to move on with my life. The program is going to take about 2 years to complete 2. Hawaii is so far and I've never moved so far from my support system/family. 3. I'm scared, and honestly couldn't see myself making such a huge leap.
However, I love this guy. I’m young and I feel like these should be my happiest years. Even though I am about to accomplish a huge goal in my life (graduating with my bachelor's in Psychology) I’m still not happy. I feel alone and empty, and simply by talking to him I feel like I mean something that I’m important. Being a psych major, I know that all of our feelings and action derive from somewhere.
I don’t want it to seem like I need a guy to give my life meaning. I have goals and dreams of my own. I want to work in education so eventually I plan to get me doctorates. I just feel like life is too short to continue doing the same thing when I’m not happy. He wants me to come to Hawaii, but he also wants me to do what’s best for me. Which would be staying in Florida to get my master’s.
My ideal course of action: Graduate in May. Find a job in Florida and work, so I can save money. Also, so I can gain experience, so when I move to Hawaii finding a job would be less difficult. Before this year is over I move to Hawaii, work, and continue my education. I want to spend my life with him, so marriage will fit in somewhere.
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What's the hurry? Ask yourself if your education is worth the empty feeling. I think it is. You're relationship, assuming it's worth what I imagine it is, will be there at the end of it. Do what you need to do. Build a support for yourself with your education and start your life at the end of it. They say life is too short, but you can find yourself with regret more easily one might think.

Keep in mind, yes, you're young, but I'm 29 and I'm still considered young. You may not realize it now, but you have plenty of youth to get through before you run out of it. You have time, so I'd use it to prepare for the future. You're relationship sounds strong, it can certainly survive the wait.




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