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:.Hey x3My name is Emily and blah blah blah.
:.I have a lot of personal, family, and friend issues of my own so a lot of times, I can probably relate to you a lot of times if you have personal, family, and/or friend issues.
:.I can offer a lot of information, help, and advice on family and friend relationships, love lives, depression, stretching/flexibility, weight loss, violin, being organized, dog training, forensics (public speaking), keeping up with school/extracurricular activities, eating disorders, writing (stories and poems), and probably a lot of other random stuff like what to drink when you eat something spicy and why.
:.Although I can help a lot of you guys on the above subjects, I don't tend to take my own advice so it can become quite an awkward/ironic/contradicting situation for me or make myself sound like a complete and utter hypocrite.
:.Hannah Whitall Smith once said, "The true secret of giving advice is, after you have honestly given it, to be perfectly indifferent whether it is taken or not, and never persist in trying to set people right." I agree 100% of it. Advice is advice and it is given when asked for. I give it and I leave it at that. It's up to the questioner/advice seeker to take it.
:.That point leads onto my philosophies in advice giving:
1. Advice is given when asked and no time else, unless your friend is about to irritate a black bear, then you should definitely advice your friend to back away and run for his or her life.
2. Advice is not critical, not judgmental, and definitely not biased. Advice is advice and should remain neutral.
3. Advice is to help, not to get 5s on every answer. As a result, my advice ends up being quite blunt and frank with a hint of rambling mixed in.
If you have general questions on the topics I can be a lot of help in (as listed above), most likely, they will be in my FORUM
If it is not, you can inbox me to request me to put it up.
:.If you want to ask me a question directly...
a)if it is not urgent and can wait a week or so, inbox me.
b)if it is an urgent question such as "I'm being eaten by a shark! What do I do???" first of all, I'm quite amazed that you can type while being eaten and second of all, e-mail me at cancel.life@gmail.com. I will answer you by midnight of that day (or if it's 11:55PM, probably by 3PM the following day).
advice
15/m
I swear im depressed, i cry alot like everynight, i feel like shit and want to die sometimes...
okay well i was fine until i met sammie, then we were goin out and i really loved her and then we broke up and all and i got crushed, ever since i have no been the same... like now 2 months later(this past sat) she tells me she likes me alot but doesnt want a bf right now, and like now im crying harder cuz now tomorrow is my birthday and i want to hang out with her so so so so bad on sat. and for like the past two days after she told me how she felt she been ignoring me and when i call her she says shes in a bad mood and doesnt wanna talk to me... well i asked her to hang out with me on sat. and she said oh idk i might hangout with chris(her best friend but i thikn more) i swear if i lose her im killing myself, i know ill do it, shes everything to me... i cant lose her...
READ THIS...unfortunately there is no way to reply comments..so this is the only way to reply questions that are asked through comments >.>
MY sn:
r0ck0nl0ser
I'm not on very often but you probably can catch me on there over the weekends or next week =]
Hope you read this...
Well, first things first...HAPPY [ALMOST] BIRTHDAY!!!
Heh, okay I'm going to tell you that you're not alone and don't kill yourself and all that shit. Yes, trite, and unhelpful at times.
But death is a wonderful thing and yet a curse to many people. But when it occurs, the person who's getting death may think they [will]feel relieved (like yourself) but people around you will get the other effect: they'll mourn. Trust me and it's going to effect a lot of people in a negative way. Think of leaving your family. Do you really want them to suffer...do you want Sammie to suffer? Because you're suffering a lot form what I can tell right now but you're still living. Key thing: You're still carrying on with your life and you know that you can do it. You're proving it right now. My uncle commited suicide few months ago and it's still taking parts in our lives. If you don't want to lose Sammie, you're going to have to start a "new" life.
Forget about the past. Just forget about everything that's happened so far. Start a journal (I know, trite) Write down everything and anything you want to. Whenever you're feeling down, sad, happy, just write EVERYTHING down. Whether it's just a regular entry or a poem, lyrics, short story just whatever. I do that a lot and it really helps me. Or start a long story and get yourself lost in it for a while if you want to escape reality. Listen to music that will make you feel good..not pop preppy OMG I LOVE you songs. Drawing is also good along with kicking balls like soccer and stuff.
If you don't want to lose Sammie, you should really get yourself back together. She's still your friend and be greatful for that. You still have her in your life even if she does end up going out with Chris. She'll still be your friend no matter what but you're going to make it hard on her if you continue these thoughts and feeling sad.
If you need someone to talk to, just talk to me. I'll help you because I've been in and am in situations like this and most times worse.
I dont know exactly how to put a pic into my advice column. I try to upload a pic from my digital camera but it says that the file size is too big. what does that mean and can anybody tell me how to do it.
Okay, open up the folder with the picture on it on your computer (obviously)
Right click, copy, and open a Paint document up. (The one where you can doodle) Paste it on there. There, click the little square on the right bottom hand corner of your picture and drag it up to the left top corner to make it small. Save it and try uploading it agian. It should work
what is your idea of a mature relationship? what are some things that you and your boyfriend/girlfriend could talk about that would be considered mature. I mean yes, i know the basics. But, i really want my boyfriend and my relationship to go a lot deeper. what are some conversations you'd talk about? i know me and my boyfriend aren't that matured as a couple but i want to find ways that could make us mature...mutually. oh, and we haven't had sex yet. It's been six months and i really want to be as open and honest with him. I tell him everything. I just want to make sure im ready for everything, i want us to face things together.
please no rude advice either. I know people do leave advice thats really immature but with all honesty, i am asking for a very good reason.
thanks.
Okay, well don't get so into the relationship yet because most guys don't look for such deep ones but I can't speak for them.
Anyways, just take it up a step and figure out what his plans are after high school, what job he wants to persue, etc. Don't go rambling about marriage though. Haha.
You guys can also get into each other's views on political situation, religion, government, etc.
Go back to the past and ask what he thought of you before, what triggered him to like you/ask you out, talk about dates and stupid/fun/embarrassing moments you guys had together and just talk about the past times.
There is really no set of guidlines anyone can follow to have a mature relationship. It just takes it own course and time will help it develope into a stronger and deeper one.
But anyways, good luck and have fun =]
This confuses me to the point where it makes me sad.
Ill explain the situation.
A guy.
Me and my friend both like.
We all know eachother VERY well.
He claims he hates both of us.
He told me he didnt hate me anymore,yet he told someone else he did.
He tells he hates her and he likes me as a friend.
Yet, he wont talk to me at school.
But, sometimes he talks to her.
Usually , he'll try and get my attention but not talk to me.
Or when we are together, he will do something to her and not me[for attention],he'll just like give me this stare.
oh yeah, i forgot to mention that both of us did sex kinda stuff with him, but i did it more and he said he would do it with me again but not her.
But at the same time, at school he would call me fat and etc.
IS this kid on drugs or what?
I need help , this is always making me sad.
And your gonna say to move on, i try and i try and i try,
i cant get over this kid.
Ive liked him ON and OFF for 3 years, but this time has been the most
thnks
I think he's trying to deal with a lot of problems at once. One would be emotional. One would be peer pressure. One would be just life itself.
He may have some friends that he wants to hang with but they (sorry, this will sound mean) might dislike you and make fun of you in some way or another and he may feel pressured to say "Oh I hate her, she's ugly" blah blah just to fit in.
He could also be confused at where you guys stand. Like you guys had sexual activity done previously and now he's just confused as to maybe what he should be like around you guys. Guys say girls are complicated..heh. They should speak for themselves at times.
I think that you and your friend should take a time out with him. Talk with your friend so you guys have no misunderstandings right now. Then tell her this plan too:
Tell this boy to sort things out. He's going back and forth between being a friend and a total jerk. He needs to sort out what he's feeling for who by himself before he starts to act up again. Tell him that if he doesn't straighten out his thoughts and stop being rude, he's going to lose both friendships and the friends. No one should deserved to go through such things as this and he shouldn't allow that to happen to people he consider as friends.
i have been getting my period like every 2 weeks,
its been 6 months, shudnt i be used to it by now?
its really obnoxious.
irregular period excuse doesn't seem to work here..it seems a little weird and that's too often to be getting periods. you should go to a doctor or a gyno and get it checked out
does popping your cherry hurt and can you pop the cherry by wearing a tampon for the first time?
Yes
It could happen but you could also break it by falling, getting hurt in sports, etc.
Im a 15 year old female and I think Im bisexual. I like guys but I think I like girls. Like, I think about making out with them and stuff like that. I know a couple bi people but anyway. Should I experience stuff with a girl and see if I like it before I make up my mind about being bisexual? Im attractive to them, I think.
-Confused.
We're all teenagers. I'm bi myself. You should definately experiment and see if you are interested in them or not before announcing yourself as bi. But make sure that you do it with a girl that you know and trust won't spill it all out to her friends because if you find out that you're not, then it's going to get messy
can someone tell me the EXACT definition of straightedge? i think its just not getting into drugs and alchohal, but can someone tell me the true definition of it. thnx
Straight edge was started by a band called Minor Threat. Usually when kids underaged for drinking go to concerts, the guard people put a X mark on their hands to show that they weren't able to drink so that's where the X, XXX, sXe forms of sXe come from.
It means ABSOLUTLY NO drugs, alcohol, smoking, and casual sex (if it's like a deep relationship, it's fune but if it's a one night stand type of thing, no no). If you have broken any of the rules previously or offended it in one way or another, your rights of being sXe is taken away.
Some people associate sXe with people being athiests but I must tell you that what they is not always the came. Some sXe go to the exreme to turn themselves into a vegetarian or a vegan but that is not necessary to be sXe
sXe may seem like no fun like the person said below but it should be led by everyone. It's very safe and keeps you healthy and you can disassociate yourself from all the drunks and the stoned.
i think taht the answer you gave me was the one i was looking for!!!
your great!
thanks A LOTTTTTTTTT
Thanks! ...what question did I answer? Haha but glad to help =D
i'm so addicted to facebook. i get on for hours on end and don't get off even if i'm not talking with anyone. any tips on how to curve my addiction?? haha..
Limit your time on the cpu. Or just shove the computer away from you for a while..or just DELETE it. Haha.
but seriously, stay AWAY from the cpu at all costs. If you have hw, use the school cpu or go to the library.
Or just distract yourself in front of the tv,,hw
i wanna lose weight. the thing is, i'm hardly hungry but i've got a horrible appetite for anything and everything fatty - chocolate, ice cream, fries, if it's bad for you, i crave it constantly. how do i tame my appetite? or at least not yield to it all the time? help!
Haha, I wonder why all the healthy foods aren't as addicting and delicious as those fatty ones.
Okay, to curve your cravings:
Drink lots of water. Whenever you want to eat a bad food, drink water, wait it out for 10min, and if you still want to eat it, crab a carrot instead.
Make your mom and dad swear NOT to get you fries from McDonals/BK or allow you to access the sweets and junk foods. Make them lock it up.
Buy veggies and fruits and cut them into eatable/bite size pieces and store them distributed into a serving size in ziplock bags and store them in the fridge on the shelve you see first when you open the fridge and hide the bad food in a corner or the back or the bottom or the fridge. That way you're tempted to grab the veggies instead of bending down/moving stuff to access to the fats.
ohk i want my stomach flatter how can i make it like reallllllllllly flat before summer?
There's no shortcuts. Keep that in mind.
First you need to burn off all the fat before you try and tone it. So do aero, run, cardio, etc. When you've lost all your belly fat, start doing curl ups and crunchs.
Also eat healthily, avoid junk food and sweets at all costs
last friday i was with these guy, and i had drank a bit and , onething lef to anothe, and so we finished kissing. the problem is that he is a firends`s ex guy. they had been togehter for two months or more, but these was like a year ago. this friend of mine is not here, se went on holidays, and she wont be back until next week.
i know i have to tell her about these episode, but, how can i do it????????? help meeee
Hmmm. Alcohol has pretty harmful effects.
Invite her over like on a Friday or Saturday so she'll have time to cool off on Sat/Sun if she's mad. Invite her over and casually ask "Hey, are you over (name)? Like totally over him?"
If she saiys yes, say "Good because I made a really stupid mistake when I was drunk..." and explain the kissing part and how you kissed him because you were drunk and not because you like him. If she says no, say "I hope you won't get mad at me for this" (explain the kiss part)
If she's mad, tell her that you understand and you'll wait for her to forgive her.
If she isnt...great! She shouldn't anyway because she should be over him
can someone help me divide when to drink 8 glasses of water throughout the day? it's pretty hard now since i have to go to school and i don't bring water to school because my class is crazy and would destroy it or have a water fight with it
Hmm, okay have a glass of water by your bed every night/morning
When you get up and get all ready for school, drink a glass of water. at breakfast try to drink two or 1. during lunch try to drink 2 and after school when you get home drink one. during dinner drink 1 or 2. wait how many is that? 5 minimum. b/w dinner and when you get ready for bed drink one. right before you go to sleep drink one. the other one...well
Hey I have a qusetion. My friend told me to go become a lesbian. How do I do that?
I'm going to have to say wtf and you're disgracing yourself and the homosexual people.
You can't just go and BECOME a lesbian.
Your friend is just being stupid telling you to be a lesbian. Lesbian is a female that only likes females and wants nothing to do with males when it comes to relationships and stuff.
So unless you truly likes girls and only girls and have no interest in boys in a relationship kind of way, you can't become a lesbian
Well one of my friends who i have been really close to since 5th grade has been having boy trouble but its complicated. She had a thing with one of our friends and then were cute together for awhile but then she broke it off with him and has been accusing him of things that she used to like. Like she is accusing her best friend of being all over him but really tey are just talking or something. And the first time she said it i believed her when she accused them of being all over eachother becuase someone else agree'd who was there, but now its just rediculous.And she is telling us not to talk to him pretty much because if we hang out she gets mad at us. I dont know what to do because i dont want to ruin either friendship but i feel like i might flip out on her at any second because she needs to get over it but i dont know how to tell ehr nicely because she is a very emotional person who lets her angry get the best of her way to fast.
You need to make it clear that you are friends with her AND this boy and she's going to have to accept that.
If you're into direct confrontation, ask her to come over and hang out at your house for a while. Tell her these things and make them clear:
-You are friends with both and you want to sustain the friendship but she's making it hard for you
-You love her but you have to still be able to make decisions by yourself as to who you'll be friends with
-She needs to move on from her ex. He's HER ex. That shouldn't affect other people's social life.
Just make sure you're nice about it. If you hate talking face to face, write it down on a piece of paper and give it to her at the end fo the school day on Friday so she can read, cool down, think about it and THEN come to school
ok. so i have ALWAYS (since pre-skool) have been known as a tomb-boy.....(im a girl), but a year ago i started to like this boy. but i would NEVER tell ANYONE....this year hes in my class. AND on top of that, his locker is RIGHT next to mine!!! omg. now, he talks to me. and i like wrestling and so does he. and lately, when he sits near me in a class, he talks to me more. so now im starting to think he likes me. but i really dont know. SHOULD I ASK HIM OUT? OR TELL MY FRIENDS I LIKE HIM?! I RELLY NEED AN ANSWER!!!
ps. i DO NOT want my friends to ask him out for me AND HES BEST FRIENDS WITH MY BEST FRIEND! (whose a boy)
CHILLAX
Okay, I'm a tomboy too and the iffy thing about that is that almost all the guys you meet, they'll feel comfortable around you and just see you as one of the "guys"
It's your decision as to whether you tell your friend if you want to or not. It really depends on whether you wanting it to get out or not.
You should be friendly with him but not too much. Flirt a little and be/act different to him. Like don't act as if you would with your other guy friends. Let your actions toward him stand out differently from your actions toward your other guy friends . See how he reacts to it. He may ask you out or just still see you as one of the "guys"
ok. ive been BEST friends with this girl since 2nd grade. then she moved 2 years ago. but we still talk and see eachother. but after she moved, she started caring about hoe she looked, and she started being mean to me on the computer. but when i talk to her she's like her old self. and the most important thing is now (on the computer) she's starting to tell me that i should dress better, and i should wear brand names. but that's not me. what should i do?
Tell your friend that it's YOUR life and you are going to make decisions as to how you're going to look. If she doesn't like it, she's not a good friend because she should like you for you and not how you look.
Also, if she's moved, you shouldn't be lingering on her so much. She's MOVED. Just keep her as a best internet buddy or something like that. But you shouldn't give way for her to tell you to wear this and that..
ok lately i have been thinking of commiting suicide. most of the time i just get scared and dont do it. but im always depresses and crying for no reason. i need help and my mom doesnt want to take me to therapy because she doesnt want anybody to know what goes on in our house. my mom also says that if u commit suicide or cut yourself you will go to hell. thats basicly the only thing keeping me from jumping out of a window. so what are some free hotlines that i can call to help me through this or something because i dont want to feel this way. PLEASE HELP ME!!!
Um, I see that your mom's very supportive.
Okay http://suicidehotlines.com/ go to that site
Tell your mom that you need emotional support and love right not. Not some lecture or harsh words.
Write what you're feeling down in a journal, draw, listen to music. What helps me is when I have a very bad event happen to me, I just write it all down. Whether it's in 3rd person view or 1st. I write it as a poem, lyrics, just a little short excerpt in 3rd person view, or get myself lost in my long stories that I write. What I do also is talk to someone that I trust dearly. And I met him online by the way. So go to a chat room and flag down someone and just vent out all your problems to them.
If you need someone to tlak to, I'm here.
AIM: r0ck0nl0ser
YIM/MSN/Email: xchoke_on_dead_hopex@yahoo.com
This is weird, but I've searched online and can't find ANYTHING!
me and my boyfriend are wondering if anyone knows of anything fun to do in Northern Virginia (in the Vienna and Fairfax areas). Usually we go to the movies, or dinner, or mall. but we've gotten a bit tired of that, and we're hoping for some help. as i said before please don't tell me to search online because I've tried. Suggestions would be kindly appreciated. :)
Thanx!
Also even if you dont live in VA, if you have any ideas about what we could do...something new and fun..that would be great! :)
I live in VA but I'm down in the Hanover area..
During the summer, you can always go to the beach, the pool, and have a little picnic. Moon bounces are always fun thing to do to break the trite things you guys always do. Go to the roller rink place. Amusement parks are always uber awesome but somewhat expensive if you guys don't have passes. When it's cold, go ice skating.