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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!

advice

Hi :) me and my dad had a huge argument about 18 months ago and we haven't really talked since then. It was pretty serious what he did but I decided to let it go with the urge from my step-dad who said to give him another chance.

We sat down and had a meeting about how I felt and all of that crap but even after I opened up, he was still acting like a high and almighty person who never made mistakes. But still, I'm trucking on.

I don't know what to say to him anymore to start a conversation. It will go something like:

Me: Hi
Him: Hi, how was school?
Me: Good, I didn't learn much.
Him: Oh, that sounds eventful. Work was boring.

And then we say goodbye. Even before our relationship went downhill, that is how it was. And we used to do that nearly everyday. I don't know what to do about it anymore.

Any tips?

!8 months is quite some time ago. If things haven't resolved yet, my instinct says, it won't unless something different is done to handle what started this in the first place.
I will assume that both you and Dad had a great relationship with no problems talking to each other before 'the incident'. You mentioned a huge argument but then say 'it was pretty serious what he did. I will also figure you didn't mean the arguments were what was pretty serious, but what he did to you that caused the argument in the first place. In case it's more about What he did rather than having always lived with a Dad who has to always be right, I need to cover some things the others didn't. Forgive me if I am jumping to conclusions, but it sounds unresolved to me, like two people trying to maneuver around an elephant filling up the room as you try to pretend its not there or has been already kicked out. Emotionally, you are not over it and because this is your Dad and you love him despite what happened, you may have felt that the best thing to do was to sweep all your feelings under the rug including the one of where he didn't seem genuinely repentant for what he did, or the apology was not sincere. Yes, we can tell when that kind of thing is not sincere. I have read about what starts anxieties and and other emotional problems for people. One of those reasons is a 'Nice" person who doesnt want to rock the boat or fight or argue, just try to accept what has happened by sweeping the problem under the rug and trying to go on. That is why I said earlier, this will not go away until you can let him know you are still not okay with what happened, because it still feels unresolved. When talking, dont use You statements. Like you didnt really seem sorry. Instead, I felt then and still do that there wasn't a genuine feeling sorry and so I also fear its something that could happen again. Now you mention a step dad urging you to ignore and let it go with your birth dad. Again, you likely went against what your feelings and instincts were saying and tried to drop the issue to also show step dad that you can be a Nice person. But that also didn't help you. You now felt you didn't have support from other family, that Dad shouldn't be held responsible in his position as your parent, for whatever it was he did.
I can't end this without telling you that myself as a person, when I hear someone say it was real serious, my mind tends to think of worst possible case scenerio, such as being hit by someone, which is assault and battery and a felony, and then there is also rape, another felony. Just in case one of these applies here, let me remind you if it was some other person, non family, someone off the street who did this, the police would have been involved. We tend to not want to mess up the lives of family if such a thing is involved and may feel guilt over doing so if it is just a One time occurance. It may well be. But your mind isn't reassured of this because in most situations, where a person is capable of any kind of violence, they will at some point repeat that action if they don't get professional help. It doesnt matter if it was stress that drove them to do it, depression, or perhaps some kind of mental issue that until now has never been diagnosed. I'm only covering this angle as no one else did.

On the other hand, if this is nothing more than both of you just having poor communication skills and not willing to be real and open with each other, perhaps reading a book on how to communicate better might be a good project for both of you to go through to gether. Take turning reading to each other and sharing what you feel about what was read and be willing to do any exercises the book mentions, then perhaps there may be a change. I only wrote what I did in response because what you wrote made this sound much more serious. I wish you the best in resolving what ever this is.

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My group is two people who I'm really close with. I'm going to call my friends M and B. So me and M have sleepovers just the two of us, and M and B have sleepovers just the two of them. Recently B realized that we have never hung out/ had a sleepover just the two of us. So we had a sleepover and when M found out today about she got really pissed at us and hasn't talked to us since....

If you are teen girls, then there's a good chance M's hormones may be responsible for her getting really angry and still choosing to not talk or associate with you. the hormones of puberty will change a girls emotions so their emotional responses are beyond what is reasonable for a situation. Then again, at any age, a person can be still immature in areas, never having really grown up or learned relationship skills and how to communicate effectively, not just when happy but when upset. Of course, she feels left out. I dont understand why it always was just 2 people and not 3 for a sleepover. I guess she isn't thinking about the times you were not included when her and B had sleepovers. Perhaps no ones house had enough room for a bigger sleep over?
Give her time to cool off before approaching her. Even though technically, you've done nothing wrong, the best way to get her to warm up to you both would be for both of you to apologize to her if it hurt her feelings being left out. Then resolve to find ways where all 3 of you can sleep over. Reassurance is needed besides the apology. Assure her that she is still as much your friend as B. You care about both of them, and one is not any better than the other, her and M both have enough of their own unique qualities that one could never be a replacement for the other. Then stroke her ego next with compliments. It must be genuine where you tell her exactly what it is that you like specifically in her that B or you don't have. Lastly, in resolving issues, its always best to bring up issues using I statements instead of you statements. She still needs to know whether you felt left out or if you felt it was okay that M & B had sleepovers where you were excluded. example: instead of "You made me feel left out," use "I felt left out when I wasnt a part of your sleepovers." Good luck.

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Hi, he's a work colleague and we joke and get on ok. but recently, he's been saying pointing jokingly,'she's in love with me'. what actually he mean? the other day, he saw me looking in the mirror and he said,'you're very pretty' i said thanks. he jokes heaps as we all know but about this certain things he should not be. so guys, what is he thinking?

If you are attracted to him and want to get to know him and he is single and able to date, then I would ask him what he means.
Otherwise, if you really aren't interested in pursueing him, then ignore his silly remarks cus even if you did understand when he was joking or when he was serious, it makes no difference if you are not interested. I don't personally like people who beat around the bush and can never be to the point and say what needs to be said plainly and I know myself, that I might be able to stand it for a while, but long term in a relationship, a guy like that would drive me crazy.

If you're not sure if he's seeing someone or married (lots of guys don't wear rings or mention wives cus its a bad marriage or they are players)

then you need to ask if he's single. If he asks why you ask, its easy, refer to his flirting. "Well, with the way you are flirting, you come across as single cus if you were married, you'd be in deep trouble with your wife or even girlfriend. " And let him know if you are not into being the woman who breaks up another relationship. Some don't care. Some gals do.
He may have other issues, mainly shyness and not knowing how to have regular convo. with people so he covers it up with all his joking and flirting and may actually be a nice person under all that. Only way to find out is to start talking to him and learn more about him, to see if he's someone available that you'd like to date.

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Hi!

So, just a little background; I'm a 21 year old female and the 2 guys in this situation I am talking about are also 21. One day my good friend J decided to set me up with his room mate that was new to town and he thought we would be good for each other. So we ended up going on a double date and the guy (We'll call him X) seemed nice but very shy. We exchanged numbers at the end of the date and he texted me the next day... but the texting felt very dry and very non-talkative. But either way I agreed to meet up with him for coffee a couple days later.
In between those days that we made plans I went to a party and met this other guy (let's call him Z) and he was sitting alone on a couch so I went over and introduced myself and we really hit it off and had fun talking. So he got my number at the end of the night.
A couple days after this I went for coffee with X and the conversation never died. We talked about normal first date things; work, school, and family. At the end of our coffee date he hugged me and asked if he could see me again. we made plans for a couple days after that to go to a movie. In between this time I had Z on the back burner because I met him at a party and was trying to focus on X. Me and X went to the movie and it was very nice but he didn't make physical contact with me the whole time, no touch of the hand, no hug or no kiss which I thought was odd on a first date (maybe he's just shy?).
That weekend Z was very persistant with texting me and asked me to come out with some friends and meet him at a bar after his hockey game. One of my good friends is seeing his hockey team mate so its very easy to convince them to go. We went and I wasn't really sure what to expect.. maybe a hello and a have a goodnight? No he was with me the whole night and kept giving me forehead kisses and introducing me as "his girl" to his friends on the team and we had great conversation that night as well. It was the next day that I realized I could not ignore my feelings for Z like I had been: it's obvious we had an attraction.
So I was texting and talking to both of them, and Z invited me over last night after I had finished my homework for the night to watch a movie. He made it clear that he was not inviting me over just to hook up with me but he also said that if, at the end of the night it was really late, I could stay over at his house. I went over and watched a movie and just cuddled and then after we madeout a little bit and he offered to go cuddle in bed for a bit but I told him I should go home and he said okay but I should come over soon.
I saw my friend J again ( the one that set me up with X) and he said that his roommate, X, was very shy and he really likes me.

So now I am faced with a problem.

On one hand I have X: Who is nice, respectful but very shy. J has told me that X really like me and he wants a to commit to someone and get into a relationship. He had a job in the trades and is living on his own. He seems like the "safe guy". Someone who will really like me and everything will just be easy.

On the other hand there is Z: He is still going to school and not sure what he is going to do in the future in regards to a career. He has played very competitive hockey and hockey boys have that "player" stereotype to just hook up with girls and leave. I'm really not sure what to think because he did ask me to hang out so late, but he didnt try to do anything with me...but he did invite me to cuddle in bed. He is oviously the "risky" choice.

I'm not sure what one to pursue? Or to keep seeing both casually without commitment and learn more about them? I know that Z is the riskier choice but everything seems easier and that it flows better than with X; someone who seems shy and I sometimes don't know what to say around him.

Thank you for your help, and thank you for reading this loooooong situation :)

Kaaitlyn

I'll add a few things to what adviceman said. I agree with him, X is the better choice. I understand wanting some of the thrill and excitement with a guy but if he is just shy, that is something a person can overcome. I used to be shy or todays its called social anxiety. However I wasn't shy with those I've known a long time or friends who befriended me first. So many of the quieter guys get overlooked by women cus they don't see anything but the stable part of the guy, and can't see ahead to how loving and devoted a partner he'll be. My own 2nd husband showed me by his attention to me that he was interested, but without saying he was waiting for me to make the first move, he waited. So I had to give the first kiss and initiate sex. Once he knew I was ready, comfortable with it and wanted him, then he transformed into a lover with a voracious appetite and is always looking for little things to do to please me, serve me, treat me to special words and gifts or deeds. So I would say, give him a try, and make your move. After you've initiated everything, if he doesnt warm up or he does and you discover you both have nothing in common, then you can always end it and look elsewhere.
Learn to trust your instincts which seem to be strong from what you wrote. Womens intuition is often right. From what you wrote only, perhaps Z would make a good friend with benefits type deal but you don't really know in the end how good a husband, a provider or father he would make. And true, we don't always know the future potential of a person still in their early twenties. However, as you mentioned, X is already showing potential and stability in a job and having his own place. While Z might get there some day, let me tell you as a mom of 3 kids and an ex who had very little potential, its hardwork to live on practically nothing, buy only 2nd hand for the kids, fight over money, use mostly food banks and always be in the mode of catching up on bills, me having to pinch pennies and still get harassed for what little I spend on basic needs for the kids while he wastes 250. a month on Starbucks and another 100. a month on books he'd bought. Thats only a small slice of what I had to live with. But like your Z guy, he was the more outgoing and seemed more fun and wise in ways of the world, and made the sexual moves on me first.

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So I have this friend let's call her Natalie,we've been friends since kindergarten and let's just say I was never the best friend she could ever have growing up but I've changed and matured as a person, when we were an elementary school I wasn't the best at keeping secrets but now I learned my lesson and keep everyone's secrets. So basically me, Natalie and this girl were friends, Natalie and the other girl claimed to be "sisters" I was the third wheel with them and tbh the only reason why Natalie and I were still friends were because we've known each other for a long time, it was a new school (high school) and our parents are close. So summer of grade 10 Natalie had a crush on this guy, but the guy had a crush on my other friend. Natalie told my other friend to stay away from him cause she liked him, my other friend aka Natalie best friend that she calls a sister didn't listen and long story short that friend made out with him at his house, so Natalie cut him off. They made this whole situation my business when they would fight over me at lunch to see who i would hang out with. Natalie would always say "I've known you since kindergarten you've only known her since grade 6 so hangout with me at lunch" when in reality I'd rather hangout with the other girl cause she's always treated me better than Natalie ever did. So I told my mom about the situation not knowing she would tell Natalie's mom and Natalie's mom told Natalie and then September of grade 11 Natalie yelled at me in front of everyone saying I should mind my own business and I shouldn't have told my mom, cause I knew better and that I'm fake. Then later that month she forgave the other friend even after how many times they fought and even after she went for the guy she liked, but all I did was tell my mom and she cut me off. That's when I knew that Natalie and I were never friends to begin with, she was waiting for the moment that I would do something for her to be mad at me so that it would give her an excuse to cut me off. So The whole school year Natalie ignored me, if I walked behind her she would close the door in my face, if I was near her she'd give me a dirty look. By June of grade 11 it's like her spirits changed cause she said hi to me and she was smiling and she said sorry when she bumped into me. I'm the type of person who doesn't like knowing if someone doesn't like me, you can dislike me all you want but I don't want to be aware of it, so since I knew she disliked me it bothered me the whole school year till that day she said hi so it made me feel better. It's senior year now and I don't really care about her anymore we don't talk but since our parents are friends my mom is always talking about her mom so Natalie's name is brought up in my house one every two weeks. So my question is why does Natalie keep appearing in my dreams when I go to bed? It's annoying sleeping and waking up to her I my head they're not good dreams either they're always of us fighting cause that's technically how we left the friendship, in a fight she never apologized for yelling at me that day btw. I tried talking to her all grade 11 year but she ignored me until June and I don't wanna talk to her now because she's really really rude and she'll make a scene what do I do?

While asleep, its our subconscious mind that takes over the running of everything, making sure we take our next breath, wakes us if theres a sound out of the ordinary, and it controls our dreams. This is our emotions are tied to the subconscious mind. It can be good things, things we fear, or things that make us unhappy. If you are seeing her in dreams that are more of the same trouble you already have, your subconscious mind isn't ready to let the issue go and ignore her as your conscious mind wants to do. Your subconscious is trying to tell you that while everything is over and good in Natalies mind, its not over for you, there are resentments and hurts that have never been taken care of and healed. Going to her and talking to her/having your say, is not going to make you feel better. It could rock things up and get her harrassing you again. You dont need to have anything to do with her to deal with her in your dreams. While awake, you need to work with your conscious mind. A few truths about what happened in the past, about life in general, if you can accept and be okay with them, is generally all you need to stop a recurring dream on a subject matter. I would guess that you need to inwardly forgive her. She doesnt need to hear the words cus shes not hurting, you are. What you think or better yet, speak out loud and address to your subconcious mind will eventually have its effect.

So here's 2 things that I think may help. First, the hormones of puberty in girls don't stop affecting them once they start a period and their breasts have grown, they continue on to run havoc with emotions which go out of control. Instead of just sad, they have crying fits or depression, instead of just a little irritated, they have uncontrollabe anger and for no good reason at all.
So its hard for teen girls to treat each other well cus the people they dump on while their emotions are out of control are those closest to them, either Mom, sisters or girlfriends.

Second: All humans have bodies that mature long before the brain is done maturing, or specifically the pre frontal cortex which partly is responsible for making good decisions. It doesnt finish growing until our mid 20s so any good decision or problem solving is very difficult and non existant in some teens.

A combo of the two are likely responsible. You were affected by and still likely are, by these things which are a phase of life. Because its not entirely intentional, due to these things, forgive her. ANd have sweet dreams.

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22/f, 28/m

I'm upset. My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year now and it has always bothered me about the amount that he has traveled. We do have communication and trust issues that we're trying to rebuild (due to his past mistakes), and we're going to our first couples therapy on Wednesday. However, I'm debating on whether or not to go at this point.

My boyfriend travels at least once a month. It's for both business and for travel for his fraternity (not college fraternity). Recently, I told my boyfriend that I felt that he travels too much. When he's back, he works during the day, comes back home, uses the restroom for 20-30 minutes, comes to bed and wants alone time for awhile, leaving me only 20 minutes of his undivided attention with him.

He told me today that he won't be here on Valentine's Day. He told me that it's because his fraternity brother is being ordained as a minister on Valentine's Day. I wanted to be okay with it, but I'm really not. He told me that Valentine's Day is a joke to most people in America and that everyday can be Valentine's Day to us. Which doesn't make any sense if I feel that he's absent or not here... But saying, "I love you" everyday should make it seem like it's Valentine's Day. I told him that sometimes it's not enough due to his daily schedule and he tells me, "it should be enough." Whenever I bring up this situation, he says, "I've been laying here with you for the past hour. It should be enough." Talking about something that bothers me, is undivided attention, but it's not any way for us to connect or bond. Then he would say, "You should focus and appreciate about what you have and not focus on what you don't have."

I don't want to sound needy, but 20 minutes of undivided attention per day is not enough. It seems like he spends most of his time on Facebook than he does with me, and according to him Facebook is "down time" for him.

Talking about it doesn't seem to help because I can see from his point of view, but he doesn't seem to understand that it's not enough time for me to feel emotionally secure in the relationship. He only has time to talk about this at night, and it's a long discussion, so he gets tired, tells me he's tired, and goes to sleep. Then he wakes up acting as if the conversation never happened.

I keep trying to have this conversation but neither of us are getting what we want. Me talking about it, frustrates him and makes him unhappy. Me not talking about it, makes me unhappy.

In the case of one, the freedom to travel and have their own schedule, in the case of the other, participating in their definition of a true relationship, with attention to time spent together, trust, and transparency. What should I do? What can I do?

I'm with adviceman. If the two of you want to make this work, then a therapist is just what both of you need.
I will say tho, that no therapist in the world can make two people who are so vastly different from each other perfect for each other. If a therapist could magically make me perfect for just any old guy off the street, then all the guys I passed over in favor of the one who became my 2nd husband, could all have made perfect husbands if they'd only gone to counseling.
Only you and he know if you really have enough in common and are both 'in love' with each other, not love like a preference for a food or flavor.

There's a good chance from the things you say are going on, that both of you are making errors due to innocence and naivety and just not knowing any better, that are hurting the relationship. These are the kinds of things that a counselor can help with. There are also some wonderful books out there. I don't know about reading for him but I've just finished a good one for women called "What Men Say, What Women Hear". by Linda Papadopoulos. You may need to also do as I did before setting out to find Mr. Right via internet dating...I made a list of who I am deep at core, that which motivates me, my hopes, dreames, talents, beliefs, etc. I spelled it out for guys. Let them know what I was looking for in a positive tone meaning instead of saying, no chubby guys, be height and weight proportionate. Altho the most important things havent a thing to do with looks. If looking for a guy who can be future husband and father material as well, you'd want on your list, A man who loves kids and wants his own. If allergic to cigarette smoke as I am, you'd want "Non smoker'. Make your list and use this guy and every guy interested in you that you come across. You want some core must haves, the things that if he isn't a match for, it's a deal breaker. In the meanwhile, while making your list, go for counseling as you can learn things like how to fight fair, give and take and compromise, and what are distorted expectations of a relationship and what is settling for less.

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a boy at school who I like asked me by message if I wanted to go out with him
my mum thinks im too young but I want to say yes what should I do
im 11 btw

I am a mother of 3 girls now all grown. Heres what I told my daughters. You might check with Mom if this is agree-able to her if agreeable with you and this 'boy'. I told my girls that when they were before the age I gave as old enough to date, that it was okay to have a 'male' friend welcome to come hang with them at our house as long as we were home and her bedroom door remained open. At your age, I know that kids can start 'liking' each other. Its early for romantic dating. But the time is perfect to start getting comfortable talking with guys and learning how differently they think from females and also how to understand what they say. Its a good time to become 'just a friend' with a boy. Not all parents may be okay with this. And by the way, not a single guy ever took my daughters up on it, none ever came to visit them at our house.

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Hi so I'm 16 years old and in the 11th grade. I have a friend that is not really a close friend but she started getting close to me when she saw, that me and her crush hang out alot. so a couple weeks ago that girl told me she have feelings for that guy let's call him jaden. I told her that I'm happy for her and then she told me that I'm the first one she tell to so I got Confused because how she go from barely talk to me to tell me something like that. the next day in lunch break jaden came to my table, in class and start talk to me then I saw her walk pass my class she came back and sat next to me. I guess she just wanted to make sure that nothing going on. a couple days pass and then she starting to tell me that they text each other and how cute he is and etc. I can tell when someone is trying to make me Jealous. I just wanted to know what can I do to show her that I'm not interested and that she can have him Cause I'm really not with all that drama.

I've come to the same conclusion as you, that she is interested in him and thinks you are horning in on the guy she has in her sights.
I dont understand why she couldn't outright ask you if you and he were a couple dating. She needs a bit more self confidence.
But since she did tell you she has feelings for him, all you need to do is encourage her to walk up to him and ask him out. Its a given that if you liked him, you wouldn't encourage anyone to do so. She can either spend her life chasing girls away from any single guy she's crushing on and neither she has the guy, nor the other girls, or be brave, take a chance and go ask him out. He might say no, but he might say yes which gets her closer to having what she wants talking to or approaching him.
I suspect that the way in which she talked to you and the way she's handling this, that she may be shy and/or have low self esteem and low self confidence. So tell her all this and if she's still unsure about how to approach him, tell her about Advicenators and show her how to post her questions here and I am sure many of us will be able to help advise her.

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Due to kiss pragnancy happen

Who ever told you that, or if this is what you believe, it is wrong. You did not give enough info but I can imagined that either you believe this due to not having proper sex education, in which it falls to you to study up and learn what you can from good sources, not your peers.

If you've heard an adult who is afraid to really talk about sex, then all you might have heard an adult say is that kissing leads to pregnancy or babies.
This doesnt mean a kiss gets you pregnant. What that statement is assuming is that the passion two young kids feel with kissing will lead them to wanting to explore even more sexually and likely be quite unprepared with birth controll, and get carried away and have sex which can create a baby if the female was ovulating at the time.

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Well, I am not so sure if he 'spanked' or 'smacked' my buttocks but he did something like that. He called me over to his desk which is in class, I was in trouble for something I didn't write. He told me to stand closer to him and when I did he started smacking/spanking my butt as punishment! I was standing, he didn't tell me to bend over and I still had my skirt on but he used his bare hands to do it. He did it a few times but it didn't hurt. I still wanted to cry though because I was so embarrassed!! Some of my classmates were laughing and others were saying its not right but my teacher told them that its 'OK' if its punishment!
Is it really OK if its punishment? Are male teachers allowed to do that to female students? I didn't tell my parents because they are very protective and freak out for pretty much everything! I am 14 and female.

I know that many rules and laws have been passed so that teachers can not touch students in any way at all, sexually, spanking or other physical punishment type things, and I found out when volunteering in a church kids program, that they wouldn't allow hugging a child either, a positive touch even if initiated by a child. I have never heard of in todays times that its okay to spank students if its punishment. You must report this to your parents. this has nothing to do with what sex you are. This is a teacher stepping out of lines. And finally your parents have something to officially freak out over and report to the prinicipal and police. If you dont say anything, a bad teacher will get to continue being a teacher and treating kids wrong. Even if this teacher had not spanked but just chewed you out in front of everyone rather than in private, that is a bad practice, not criminal by law but shouldn't be done due to it being so demeaning and humiliating to a person.

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23 Female.

Back in June my boyfriend broke up with me. We were in a 5 year realtionship and it was really hard for me to adjust. I now realize i deserved a lot better. He never took care of me i was always taking care of him needless to say he didnt desreve me as a person. Which is fine i am over that but during that time i was so depressed. I also suffer from depression and aniexty but never addmited to my problems, i thought it was always normal feeling this way. My mother tried telling me i was tempoary depressed and i told her she didnt understand. 4th of July weekend i was feeling at my lowest point and i looked at my medicine cabinet wondering what i could take to kill myself. I was in the right state of mind and stopped myself. I told my sister i was planning on killing myself and she came and got me and spent the night with me. That was the moment i realized i needed help. My doctor put me on Zoloft and i was feeling like on cloud 9. August 2nd i returned my ex's things to him we had sex without a condom and he was still a complete jerk to me. I kind of saw it has break up sex it kind of helped me to be honest. I met a new guy who i was talking to and had sex with him August 26th and then August 29th. (we used a condom both times but on the 29th we hooked up in the shower but didnt have sex) 2 days after August 29th i broke out with a huge yeast infection as the week and the pain went on i was told i have Herpes.I have slept with 2 people and now i have an STD. I thought my whole world was crashing down and now nobody is going to want me. About 2 weeks ago i was drinking ALOT i was with my 2 best friends and they were both with their boyfriends and i was feeling so sad and alone. I decided to take the rest of my Zoloft pills which was about 30 to just die at that time. Basically i was in the ICU for 3 days and my parents friends and family visited me. I was about 2 hours away from home because i was visiting friends at a school my parents didnt leave my room. They tried putting me on a physc floor but i refused to go and my parents didnt want me so far away. They discharged me because i had an appotiment with my doctor. I am seeing her again this week and yet i have tried to contact a therpasist but no one has gotton back to me or are taking new patients. It is just so fustrating. I went to a therpaist about last month and i thought i wasted a whole hour of my lfie she made me feel like nothing was wrong with me. Obviously something is wrong with me when i just OD. I saw the therpaist BEFORE i OD. Im just not sure what is wrong with me right now. My syptoms get worse when i am drinking. I am now back on the Zoloft 50. My doctor told me if i find a therpaist who wants to change it they can or up my dosage. On friday i went on a party bus for my best friends birthday and i guess i made a fool out of myself telling everyone my life story about being in the ICU. My friend went off on me telling me all these things i did and it just makes me feel worse about myself. I tried talking to my other friends and they are like well shes right im surprised you talked about it either. Do i have an attention disorder? what is wrong with me? I just want to feel happy again and normal. My friend made me feel worse about myself and she knows about all these issues im going through. Needless to say she is my best friend but i just dont want to see her again because i don't want to talk about what happened on Friday. Im already embarassed enough. I am afraid if i keep on what im doing eventually no body is going to want to hang out with me. By the way, my ex guy number 1 or guy number 2 gave me an STD anybody know? Thanks for reading and letting me vent

I'll mention the Herpes thing first. Herpes is passed on easily and a great number of people have them because the virus can be carried in a persons body after contracted without a person ever in their life having an outbreak, which seems to be the only clue to send a person to a Dr to get checked out.

Also, Herpes is not necessarily checked for in an STD screening, I had to ask for it. I'd never had an outbreak and got curious and wondered if perhaps I had it. Made sure the Dr. ran the test. It came back positive. It could have been my ex husband, or any one of a couple guys I was in dating relationship before finding my 2nd husband. Once I knew I was positive, I was honest and told guys up front in case that made a difference to them. Quite a few came forth saying they'd also been told they were carriers but had no outbreaks.
It isn't the end of the world. And there's no way to tell who you got it from, even if all men involved got tested and each is a carrier. Theres no tracing on it and thats why its passed on so easily.

About depression and anxiety, I used to have anxieties and was given certain exercises to do that cured me of it. I have found those methods listed in a self help book called When Anxieties Attack, by David D. Burns. So I am one who can say this method works. It is very complicated and being each of us is unique as individuals, I want to say that the book alone is not going to help. You'll see how complicated it can be to figure out what angle with help heal you better The book is for depression too. I am hoping that your reading it will give you hope to try for a Dr. in your area who uses the CBT method of therapy with their patients. One way you might find out is by logging on to the authors site and asking for Dr.s in your area, or where to look for them. It is www.feelinggood.com

I hope this helps you dear.

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I hung out a little bit with this guy and now I really like him. It's kind of breaking my heart. We haven't really talked or spent time together in a week and it feels sad. I decided that I need to try my best to get over him and let him come to me if he wants to. Am I right in doing this?

Yes. If he has all the possible ways to contact you, a correct phone number, knows where to find you on social media and does not do so, then he is not very interested. Women tend to interpret the meaning of a date or couple dates, or a hook up as more than it really is to a guy. Its not that men all try to hurt women. Just that men have no idea how women interpret what they say and do, and of course the same problem vice versa. I just recently finished reading a book on dating, relationships and how to understand men etc... that I believe you can learn from. It is called "What Men Say, What Women Hear" by Linda Papadopoulos. She writes with the knowledge of a psychologist background in cognitive behavioral therapy so it is fun, light-hearted but also very helpful and to the point. Not that I needed to read it for my life, I've already learned all this from the school of hard knocks in life experience. But I sure wish there was a book like this for me to read years ago when I was young. I found mine at my library and thats a place to look. But it is best to have your own copy to keep going back to and refer to as you go along. Ask at your local book store and if they dont have it, stores can order it for you and that saves on shipping costs for you. Good luck dear.

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My girlfriend and I recently went through a tough breakup, it would've actually been our three months today. Along the way, something with her depression kicked in and she didn't feel the same way about me. She still says she loves me, she's just not "in love" with me. Is there anything I can do to change this and get my girlfriend back? I still fucking love her and I can't lose the one girl who saved me.

Thanks

First you need to be dealing with a girl whose actions and choices are not being made while under depression. Only then can you know if there is a chance to get a relationship with her back on track.
So the first thing to do is to encourage her to try something she may not have done yet to get over depression. Its worth a chance, even if she's tried medication or seen psychologists before. Theres another way to heal people of depression and anxieties that is proven more effective than medications which only help a small percent of those afflicted. I came to learn about this when my ex was diagnosed with other mental illness, many of which can be improved by the same method although he resisted the help. I am talking about CBT (Cognitive behavioral therapy) and suggest you look into it and pass the info on to her. Theres a book availabe at some libraries or easily ordered from a book store called "Feeling Good, the new mood therapy" by David D. Burns. He has a website too you may want to show her.
http://feelinggood.com/

Once she is free of depression, then is the time to figure out whether she just loves some things about being with you or whether she is in love with you. Yes there is a great difference. My ex said to the counselor that he loved me as a friend and as mother of his kids but had never been in love with me. After a divorce, I looked for a new partner, and found my 2nd husband and for the first time in my life at 50 had a man who was in love with me. Its something you just know and feel in your heart if you are in love. So I can share what makes it different than just loving a person. My husband feels like another part of me, like an arm or leg which if I lost it, would be quite hard to adjust to, a loss of a limb/partner and hard to have the desire to want to go on in some cases. I find more joy in simply being in his presence doing just everyday stuff together, running errands, doing choices because life is automatically more rewarding and joyful if that special person is by your side. Also, I tend to think of his needs and feelings first before mine while at the same time he's doing the same for me. This means doing thoughtful gestures, knowing its okay to ask for what I need and it shall be done, no matter how tired or what mood he is in. If he's ill or hurting, my heart hurts for him and vice versa. We are proud to be each others mate and love others to see us together, glad to show off our mate. We make each other one of our top 3 priorities, the others being family and job.
We understand we're both human and may get frustrated but never angry with each other because we know we're both human, prone to makings mistakes and so we're quick to forgive and move on. Our most perfect gift for each other, besides store bought for birthdays, holidays, anniversary, is the time we give each other in the bedroom. This all to me is being in love. If this is how you feel, you are in love.

Many people who end up together aren't always the best match love wise, and sometimes are not a good match at all, but are fooled into thinking they are by the heightened feelings of a new experience or partner (known as NRE, new relationship energy) and it mimics the real thing of being in love. However after a while it begins to fade away until its totally gone for either both or just one of the couple. And that leaves an individual not feeling anything close to what they felt before. You said it was almost 3 months together and thats about how long ( weeks for some and a few months for others) before NRE wears off and a person doesnt feel right in the relationship anymore. So even if she was healed of depression, she may still not feel the same for you. This is part of life and I know it sucks cus I've been there before meeting my 2nd husband. I wish you the best dear. Good luck and blessings in your life.

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So my friend got a boyfriend about almost a year ago and he's her first boyfriend. I've never had a boyfriend but I've had friends who've had boyfriends in the past and they've never acted like she does, I know all people are different but she's over the top. So last year before she got her boyfriend we used to hangout outside of school, went to the amusement park, movies etc. Then when he came along we all did the same things just with him there, as their relationship began to become longer they would basically be joined at the hip with each other, and don't even bother to invite anyone else out with them anymore. Last summer she basically blew me off the whole time to hangout with him, no exaggeration he was at her house everyday, his family and her family even went to her family cottage and stayed out for a good week. Then when I asked her to have a girls night she "completely forgot" and cancelled the next day she hung out with her boyfriend. In the summer time she would only call me if her boyfriend and her were in a fight, or if she just wanted to talk about him. I finally had enough with the way she was treating me so instead of calling her out I told her that I won't be replying to her phone because I was going on vacation. Two days later she went to the movies with our other friend without her boyfriend and when I texted her "thanks for the invite" she said "didn't you say you were on vacation" I got so pissed off because the whole summer I tried to hangout with her, I always picked her phone calls when she would cry about her boyfriend, I always listened to her when she wanted to talk about him and to simply hangout she's "busy" but I didn't get mad at her for going to the movies because the friend she went with, she kind of ditched her party so she was making it up to her by going to the movies with her. So now school comes back and she hangs out with me at lunch and guess what? All she talks about to me is her boyfriend, when I try to change the subject she brings it back to her boyfriend, sometimes when I'm not there I catch her at lunch waiting by her boyfriends classroom for his class to finish. i know they're a couple but I honestly think they need some space away from each other and I don't even wanna talk about how he treats her but let's just say she cries at least twice every two weeks. Also now that's its October the amusement park has this Halloween thing so she texted me the whole month of September saying we were going to go and the beginning of October so I was all set cause we went last year, so I texted her today to confirm when we were going and you know what she said "I went yesterday with my boyfriend". So now I'm done trying cause she obviously doesn't care or she's too blinded by love to see she's pushing away from her friends. What can I do to make her see that she has prioritize between her boyfriend and friends? My other friends could do it why can't she? before you say "try becoming friends with her boyfriend you might like him" I'm already friends with him and he doesn't seem as clingy as she is to him, when I talk to him he never brings her up but when I talk to her he's brought up under 10 seconds.

Have you tried telling her how you feel? There are right and wrong ways to bring up issues. The wrong way is to say "You make me feel, you leave me out, you ignore me now..." even if it is true. Whether a person is in the right or the wrong, they are way more likely to stay open to hearing what you have to say if you don't point blame. Think about it, how quickly to you feel defensive the moment someone starts a sentence with you did this , you did that. So instead, its a simple twist to make your grievances personal starting with 'I'. I feel ignored and I feel left out. She may be immature and still react but most people would be more likely to listen. If she isn't willing to listen, gets angry with you or blows it off, then my next suggestion would be if you are friends with him, your 2nd choice is to talk to him in private when shes not around and that may be hard. Perhaps a time you know she is at a Dr. appt or has to be somewhere that he wouldnt go to...(dont go to him first, that creates more trouble with her) You say he doesnt seem to be as unhealthily obsessed with making her his life and having no life outside of her as she is doing with him. If he'll listen, you can only let him know how you feel and see if he is willing to at some point just talk to her and ask if she ever does things with any of her girlfriends anymore. You know, casual like, without mentioning that you have talked to him. He could if willing mention that they do spend a lot of time together and that doesnt leave much time for friends. If he still finds time for his own friends and family without her around, then its all the better if he were to encourage her to plan a night with her girlfriends and he could plan a night with the guys.
Neither you nor he can really do anything to change her. One can lead a horse to water but you cant force it to drink is a popular saying. Shes the horse, it can be brought to her attention what she is doing, but unless she really wants to change, she is not going to.
I dont know many males who can stand being smothered by a female for so long and not have any 'cave time', or man time with his buds or just alone time. It is unhealthy when a person makes their partner their life and lives for them and chooses to have no life outside of that. She may be a friend but theres only so much you can do, and yes it hurts to be used and otherwise ignored. Hopefully, you do have a life, unlike her and have other things to get busy with so you aren't just sitting around waiting for her to notice you and want your company as a real friend, not just a listening ear.
As to why she might be acting like this...its possible that deep down inside, she has a very low self esteem, and even if she had great parents growing up, she didnt get the kind of self esteem boosters that she needed from them and especially her Dad. That is often a reason for young women to pour their entire life into the first guy who will pay them attention. It's like a bandaid solution to her lack of self confidence and esteem and since she's hungry for that, the easiest place in her mind subconsciously to get it is with a guy. (because its subconscious, shes probably not aware consciously that she does this or that she is taking actions to fix what is lacking in her). Unfortunately, its a bandaid solution as I said. If he ever tires of her,and leaves her, she will be more devastated than the usual person because she made him her only purpose in life, he in fact became her crutch. This happens with married women too who have no life of their own other than their family...husband and kids, so when the kids leave the nest, or lose husband to death, they become controlling, trying to hold onto the kids, not wanting them to go, and meddle in their lives and talk to and visit way too much. This is a great possibility, but you are not a mental health professional counselor to help her, and she is not asking for help nor recognizing she has a problem. This is something individuals need to realize for themselves and come to a point where they are sick and tired of being this way and want to change. Only then can they be helped.
So just be honest with her next time she comes running to you, let her know you care about her and still want to be her friend but until you feel you are being treated like a friend in return, you are not going to make time for her. Right now thats what you are doing, taking any little tidbits she gives you even if its to use you.

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My best friend (age 15) cried to me over the phone that her mother keeps having arguments with her. She has to deal with her mother changing her friends, calling into the school and taking all her things away because she has depression.

My friend is worried that her school now thinks she has issues and she hates it because she tries so hard. I really want to help her but I don't know what to do or say. I had to keep repeating, calm down, think about this rationally and it just wasn't helping.

What can I do?

Oh Hon, you made my day, to hear how much you care about your friend. I want to be clear on what you said regarding 'taking all her things away because she has depression.' So I don't know who 'she' is in the statement, so either Mom has depression or your bestie has depression. If its your friend, you can tell her that having depression is quite common these days and nothing to be embarassed about. Its important to seek the help of confidence of those professionals who can help her. Dont worry I'll get to the another scenerio shortly. Gotta cover both here. She needs to go to school counselors and let them know whether she is seeing a professional counselor or not and ask for one if Mom isn't willing to take her to one. Some parents think its a phase and thinking if they take away all things and privileges in punishment, they can snap thier kid out of it, but thats not so and can drive a child to comtemplating suicide if they dont have support.

If the situation is that the Mother may have the controlling behavior, she should still talk to a school counselor. What she perceives as controlling behavior due to Mom having issues may actually be partly boths fault. At 15, I can assure you from raising 3 daughters that a teen girls hormones are still going wild affecting her emotions so teen girls see everything as worse or sadder than reality, so they can tend to cry easier, but most often, its getting irritated and angry much more easily and Mom may have forgotten she once went thru it too and just reacts to your friend and starts fighting and then cus shes the grownup, takes away privileges. Or it may be that Mom has mental issues but I think that would have been evident looong before just now. So she and mom need to talk too in case its due to teen hormone emotions. Let me know how it goes and I'll see if theres anythig else I can share .

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So me and my bf are 20 and have been together for two years. Because we live an hour away on the train we only see each other once a week (if that).
So recently my bf said for his 21st birthday he wants to spend it in Dublin on a lads weekend. (we live in England)
I told him I felt left out and he just said that every guy has lads weekends. Then he said he'd come and stay with me a few days before he flies to dublin for his actual birthday-but because I live near to an airport so it'd be handy!
Its also things in the past he's done-like he doesn't seem keen to have full blown sex anymore and the other day he refused to go for a meal at a restaurant with me opting instead for 'fast food' (so we just bought our own) and the day after we went shopping and he happily spent £30 on himself!
Truth me told-I'm not sure he is the guy I want to spend my life with-but I don't know what to do?

I am glad you added your last sentence, wondering about if he's the guy to spend your whole life with. Most of us date without that in mind having thought of every possible angle in the future of the relationship. I was like that at 20 and am now divorced from the man I married at the age. So i will share two things, a book I recently read that I find in hindsight, very helpful to teaching women how to understand men, how they think, their priorities, and also how to commmunicate what you need, and keeping to your standards, not settling for less. I found at my library in U.S. If not in yours, perhaps it can be downloaded via the net or a bookstore can order it.
"What Men Say, What Women Hear" by Linda Papadopoulos. She is a licensed Psychologist who uses the CBT method to teach people....that's cognitive behavioral therapy. It teaches how our thoughts can influence our behavior so if its distorted, not well informed thoughts, our behavior can be erratic and we cause our own unhappiness in relationships. Dont worry, I'm not blaming you for anything. But there are thoughts and ideas that made you choose him in the first place and now you need to seek for really clear thoughts to decide wherher to stay with him or not. I am not witness to whats going on so I can't say outright why he seems to have lost interest. Hopefully its nothing that over 2 yrs finally killed his love for you. Thats what happend in reverse for me. My 1st husbands treatment of me, eventually killed my love for him. While I didnt hate him either tho he treated me badly, I no longer was in love with him. Then again, he is young and its very likely at 20, even tho I know we all feel so adult and mature at the time, that he truly isn't ready for the adult responsibilities of the commitment and kind of love for a life long relationship that includes taking care of you and likely raising a kid or two.

Number two here is a list of how to tell if a guy loves you in determining whether to stay with him or not. Before you read it, I can already tell by what you shared that he falls low on the list. But here it is anyways. Hope it helps. Good luck dear. I'd like to know what you eventually do decide as I always hope that what I learned by the school of hard knocks, the bad experiences, may save other women from the same mistakes.

7 Questions to know if he really loves you


1. Does he say I love you. For some, it's a hard thing to say but they show it to you in other ways. When he says “I love you”, he is viewing that as a commitment to you. It is not a flippant phrase.
Saying I love you too early like during first couple dates is a warning about the guy. Its a very good chance he is needy and wanting a woman to be his mom. Other phrases from a guy count too, like you're awesome, I adore you. You're the woman I always dreamed of.
2. Does he make you a priority in his life? Guys have more than one priority...things very important to him but you should be one of top 3.
What he does for you or how he acts can't be faked easily because it's hard to lie with your body. Things he does without having to be asked, making dinner, picking up something for a collection you have, making time for you, even if it's a walk or a long phone chat. If the guy likes you, he'll make time for you at least a quarter of the time.
3 Does he tell friends about you and like to show you off? Have you been introduced to his family and friends? If he keeps you separate, he's hiding something or ashamed or fearful of something
4. Does he care about your pleasure during sex? Is he only into seeking his own pleasure or your's too. Does he open his eyes and want to have both your eyes connect while making love?
5. Does he respect and encourage you? Respect means, does he value your opinion, do you share decisions and treats you as a partner. Are you encouraged by him to have your own friends and hobbies outside the relationship and encourage you to seek your dreams and uphold you in that.
Jealousy is not love, it's control. It's okay to be protective, but jealousy shouldn't be what prompts the protectiveness
6. Do your friends and family like how he treats you? Others make a great gauge for judging a guys character.
7. Does he look at you with lust and passion in his eyes, with a hunger and thirst for you? Does he give you admiring looks, does he still want to sneak peeks down your shirt. What he sees is Very important since guys are visually stimulated. If he isn't looking anymore, he has lost his interest. All men because of this natural trait, will also view other women but do so discreetly, without being an ass about it. Don't expect a man to look at only you. If he doesn't look at other women at all, it may be a sign that he is gay. You do want a man who is visually stimulated by women.

How many points are true for you with your guy?
7 true He treats you as a Queen and he is an exceptional man
5-6 true He loves you. Just don't focus on what is lacking.
3-4 true He loves you enough to make the relationship work for him, without thinking of you. If it's enough for you, then be content. If you feel like you're settling for less, let him go and look for something better.
1-2 true He's a douche-bag, a user or controller. Leave immediately.

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Things have been bland for me lately. At my current age and location I'm unable to work, get a license, or attempt to get my GED. For the next six months I'll be sitting all day every day in my home as I've done for the last five years. Even when I'm of legal age, I'll have no means of getting a ride to a job, and my parents say they don't want me working. This means no saving up for anything; even college.

Besides that, there's also the problem of not having anything to do during the day. Every day it's eat, sleep, study or play games. I feel so sheltered and frustrated sometimes, but what can I do? I don't have friends to see, and going places takes money that we don't have. Times like this make me wish I was in public school, just to have somewhere to go, but then I remember I have no confidence.

What else is left to do when all I can do is lose count of the weeks I haven't been outside?

So your parents have said they don't want you working. Did they explain why? Did they mean now or after you turn 18?
They are doing you a great disservice by not allowing you to test your wings a little and allow you some ways to get used to making some decisions for yourself. You should be allowed to at least make friends with other home schooled kids, or if they're very religious, other kids from church. Its important to have friends and learn how to get along with others, understand others, much more.

As for not being allowed to drive yet, it is very expensive, and every year older that a new driver is, the insurance becomes a bit less. Our decision making skills improve as we get older too, due to the frontal lobe of the brain much slower to mature than rest of our body and not being complete until mid 20s. So if you can not learn to drive until after you turn 18, thats not so bad after all.
If they are assuming you will continue to live at home and never ever work, are they planning to take care of all your needs and run your life til the day they die? Then what? You are crippled, no more than an adult child with no knowledge of a skill, job experience, how to drive, street smarts, how to balance a checkbook, save part of your earnings, etc. How will you survive?

I assume you are the only child. Parents with an only child, who are fearful of all the things that could possibly happen to you where they might lose you, dieing in a car accident, getting raped, murdered, getting into drugs, smoking, running with a bad crowd, becoming pregnant as a teen, unwed mother, to even the stranger odd fears they may have is a good possibility of why they are basically wanting to hold you captive. If you have siblings, then I fear for them getting the same treatment unless you are the first to take some action once you legally can at 18. If at 18 you defy your parents wishes, they may threaten to kick you out if you dont do as they say. They may just be control freaks or have lots of anxieties or some mental disorders too. I dont know. But you can't allow that to keep you from doing what you want with your life.
Do you have relatives who would take you in at 18, long enough so you can start working, join some clubs and make some friends, and then with a friend get an apartment together. If you can be living in the city where theres buses, a drivers license won't be the first need to go for. YOu'd be starting from scratch to save up for a car and then have the tabs, insurance, gas and oil changes and able to pay for any repairs that come up. That right there sucks up lots of money and may not leave enough to pay rent among other things like power bill, food and perhaps paying your way part time through night school.
In the meanwhile, If you're good on the computer, keep yourself busy maybe with a blog, or downloading and studying books for any trade you think you might be interested in. Do as much study as you can now in preparation for later.

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i'm not sure how to word this properly. i'm 23/f and my entire life i've been curious as to whether or not i am as smart as someone my age should be. i don't feel like i'm quick witted and i never did well in school. i'm not sure how well i retain knowledge because i smoke weed, also. of course no one around me can answer this honestly because of fear that my feelings will get hurt. but i want to know. so i guess my question is what tests can i take or what can i do to find out this information?

If you were able to graduate high school, then I should think you have about the same average smarts as others. Some peoples minds work faster than others and some are able to come up with more creative ideas than others. I consider myself fairly average in intelligence. Met my 2nd husband over 6 yrs ago and from what he wrote me and how he talked, I believed that he was way above me in intelligence. He'd done some psychology and study of human behavior and personalities and also has a gifting for being able to figure out people from just meeting them. When I told him I told my intelligence was far beneath his, he told me that from all our initial conversations, he'd come to know that I was just as intelligent as others and even more so in life experience and the kinds of stuff that books, classes and tests can't show you and he began to list those qualities I have. I have to agree with him. It makes sense. It is more about believing in oneself than having lots of degrees and initials behind ones name. Unless you smoke put 24/7 your mind should be clear at times to be able to think. I use it for insomnia at night and it doesn't affect my ability to be smart. In fact, I have often found that I know more in common sense, and logic and life experience than some people who only know what they know from a book, relying on only what the book says. If its not in the book, they dont believe in it, that it exists, that there is another way or path, they can't accept another view and adamantly will state til their dying breath that its only correct their way. History has shown many with that kind of view point and supposed smarts to be entirely wrong. And who showed them to be wrong, those like you are me who dared to look at things at different way. Once upon a time, everyone believed the world was flat just because some scholars of importance said so and believed so.

Sorry I dont know of any tests for intelligence. But I hope this helps you think differently about how you compare yourself to others.

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Ok, so I have this friend. He's been my bestfriend since we were 12, and we're currently 16. One day, he went to the countryside and met his male cousin. When he came back, they texted as if they were lovers, like "Hi... I miss you... I love you". When I ask him, why would he say that, he always replies "He's my cousin. It's normal" I still feel like it isn't. Also, his cousin has a bad reputation, he lives alone at a young age, and his FB wall is filled with dirty stuff. My friend, on the other hand, is basically the kindest person I knew. Gosh... this is really weird to share...

So whats happening here is that your mind is jumping to conclusions. When we allow our imaginations to just run away and come up with lots of negative or distorted possibilites and scenerios, of course its gonna creep you out. But you are causing this to happen to yourself. Dont worry, you're not abnormal. Most humans think negative weird thoughts more often than they think positive ones. And it seems to take a dozen positive ones to cancel out one negative one. So when you start runing amok with your thoughts, try to catch yourself doing so and replace with positive thoughts.

As for you finding it odd that family are able to say things like I miss you and I love you, thats actually the way healthy familys are. You've grown up in a society that has grown more private and used to not showing emotions or a show of live and the falling apart of families. Thats not the correct way to be just because the majority you know are like that. Thats how it used to be in the past and still is for some. It feels awkward to you only because you are not used to doing the same. What does that say to you? Are you happy with how you are or does this challenge you to be more loving of family and friends. Cus really we don't know what the future holds and if fate will snatch a loved one away early, before we get a chance to show them our love. So its best to live life treating others as if today is the last time you'll see them alive.

Yeah, I've heard about males not showing their emotions. Lots of guy can be emotional, they just hide it, fearin
teasing and misunderstanding such as is happening with you. YOu're taking it wrong. Apparently your friend is a very well adjusted male who grew up in a home that is very stable and loving or at least affected him that way, and he has great self confidence and doesnt stop to worry or care what anyone else may be thinking about him. I used to worry like that, no more and I can say, its much easier to enjoy life if you're doing your own thing and not concerned whos monitoring you.

Also, its possible to love a person or family but not love what they do, their choices, their sin if any. The bible teaches that, to love the sinner, not the sin. So perhaps your friend has learned that as well.
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Hi. So I was on a site and it said I won an iphone 6. I read the comments and it was real buuut I need a credit card to get it and my dad doesn't have one(NO ONE in my family has one). Anyway I came across this site where I can download fake credit card numbers and CVV codes but I don't know if I should download one. Will I get in trouble if I download a number? I really want that Iphone 6.

A company will not send you anything if the number you put in is fake. If its a list of stolen debit or credit card numbers, using a card thats not yours is a crime. No one will give you for free a stolen card number. If I were you, i'd earn myself the phone the right way, bu earning money. If you're too young to work a regular job yet, it doesnt matter. Many a young child or teen has found ways to earn money, save it up and buy things with it. As a teen, I babysat and with my money bought my own bike and since parents were broke, bought as a gift one for my younger sister, bought my own clothes, etc..... I have heard a story of two sisters still in grade school who were making lots of money once word got around. What they did is what pet owners hate doing, scooping up their pets poop in the yard. People with pets want to be able to walk in their yards without having to sidestep carefully, hunting for hidden poop. Two little girls, earning incredible amounts of money with more customers than they had time to do the work. If they can do something to earn money, so can you. Do not turn to a life of crime by obtaining things illegally. Its just a short walk from that to shop lifting and ending in juvie hall.

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