ok first of all im not going to amifat.com or any website like that bcuz i dont trust them, i'd rather get advice from real people my age etc. so don't tell me to go to any website.
I've always been really skinny. People always think im anorexic and all my friends are like where do u put ur food? But i dont get my period every month probably because of it so i don't know how healthy my weight is. I'm about 5'6 and weigh about 103. Do YOU think thats healthy. Some of those crazy sites have told me it's not, and i wanna no what u think. thanx
You are too skiny. In fact, you are dangerously underweight. I don't even need to look at the figures to know that - the evidence that your weight has dropped so low that your periods have stopped is evidence enough - it means your body is unable to function as it should because you are so slim.
Do you have any idea what you are doing to yourself? You could be permanently damaging your body and reducing your fertility. I'm sorry that this seems a harsh answer, but it seems to me you need it. These websites are not "crazy" or biased, they are pure number cruchers. They are telling you you are underweight because you ARE. First, talk to a sympathetic relative - mother, sister, older cousin - then get them to accompany you to the doctor and/or diertician.
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Hey-i was reading through your column and i really liked the advice you were giving so i was wondering if you could help me out with a situation i have:
alrite so beginning of this year (i was still a junior in high school) i met a guy (a senior in high school who's now a freshman in college) through my best friend's boyfriend and one nite after all 4 of us hanging out i ended up hooking up with him. When it started out, neither of us was looking for a relationship, i was just looking to gain experience so i figured it was a great idea. Long story short-i went pretty far with him and got attached-towards the end of the school year we found out we both really liked each other, we went to prom together and were hooking up monogamously for about 4 months but he never asked me out-finally middle of summer he said he didn't wanna lead me on but he really didn't want a gf when he was gonna be leaving for college in a month-i told him i understood but naturally i was heartbroken. So i didn't see him the rest of the summer, i've just heard stories about him hooking up with other girls which killed me...literally but i finally finally got over him (its been a long long road). Anyways he's back for thanksgiving break and i haven't gotten play in awhile-so this friday we are getting together-im really worried cuz when i see him i don't know if i will have the strength to turn down hooking up with him, but i definitely know i don't have the strength to get over him again-at the same time....i desperately need play LOL. What do u think i should do?!?!
thanks
Let's look at what you've essentially said: you don't want to be heartbroken and have to get over him all over again, but you also don't know if you have the strength to say no when you see him. The obvious conclusion to me is that you need to not see him until you can be sure that you'll resist temptation, or you are going to have your heart broken again and you deserve better than that.
You deserve somebody who wants what you want, and who likes you as much as you like them. Don't waste time and heartache on a guy who can't or won't give you what you want. It's hard to go without for a long time, but you'll feel a lot better having resisted him than if you do. Good luck and all the best.
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i no this is a little sick..but my friend has been...fingering herself..and she has been..cumming..if she cums byherself and no ones cums inside of her..will she get pregant?
No, there is absolutely no chance of her becoming pregnant in this way.
You get pregnant by a sperm fertalising an ova (i.e. an egg insdie you). If you masturbate (which, for the record, is not "sick" but a normal thing people do to explore their bodies and what feels good for them sexually), there is no sperm involved - the female body cannot produce sperm. There is therefore no risk of fertilisation, and therefore pregnancy, occuring, even if the girl orgasms.
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Sorry it's long, but please try to help.
This might be confusing, so if it is, sorry. But this girl I've known since 6th grade,(I'm now a freshman, grade 9) Brittany, and have had classes with since 7th, and became friends with this year, well her mom had a tumor in her eye. And Brittany's mom had it removed about a week ago. And she had to have her head shaved because they were doing surgery going through her head. Well, lately Brittany has been getting upset a lot in class, and I want to try to cheer her up, and make her happy, but her mom might be dying because the surgery didn't go to well, she's recovering, but not the best way possible, so I have a few questions.
1.) What can I say to her to comfort her, she knows I give advice, and a lot of times she asks me, but when it comes to a personal friend, it's hard
2.) This really weird teacher that none of us like who is a lesbian (not saying that's bad, but... it's weird w/ what she's been doing) Well, she, w/o Britt's permission, told the whole class about Britt's mom, and Britt ran out crying, and we didn't know how to comfort her. And then that teacher gave Britt her cell phone number, and was like call me, and don't leave a message, keep calling until you reach me, so I was wondering, is that okay for a teacher to do that? None of us like her, and Britt said she asked 2 teachers about it, and they said it wasn't normal, but Britt does tend to over exaggerate, or lie about things (she's really popular, and does whatever she can to boost the popularity, I didn't like her until this year b/c I always thought she had a perfect life and was concieted, b/c she's really rich and stuff, but now that I've gotten to know her, I've realized why she acts that way.)
3.) We're only 14, and freshman in high school. I don't associate with her that much outside of school, unless it's at a game, or if we see each other at the mall, like I don't invite her to the mall with me and my friends, but if we see each other, we talk, and/or walk around w/ each other. So please, help me try to comfort her, and is it right for that teacher to be doing what she's doing? What can I do to help, or what can I say. Also are there any gifts I could give her for x-mas that might make her feel better, or might make her laugh, or smile? I'm not trying to be weird, or act gay, but it's been so long since I've seen her smile, and it's been so long since I've heard her laugh. She's cut her wrists in the past, and I don't want her to use self-harm again, and I'm afraid about with what's going on with her mom, she might go farther than just cutting her wrists.
Oh, and about the whole teacher thing, we don't know how that teacher found out, Brittany didn't say anything to her, we figure she must've overheard Britt telling one of us. Please, any help would be appreciated! And if you're one of those people that like to leave sarcastic, or rude advice, I could do with a good laugh, so make it funny. Thanks in advance for all the help. And again, sorry it's so long.
I had a teacher who behaved similarly when one of my friends in high school lost a close relative - the girl had asked the teacher not to tell the class, but she choose to anyway. The girl didn't appreciate this, but the teacher thought that it would be better if people were aware of what had happened so they could behave sensitively and appropriately around her. I'm sure that your teacher in this scenario had the same logic, that it would be better that people knew what Brittany was going through, although it was insensitive of the teacher to say it to the class in front of Brittany like that. I wouldn't worry about your teacher's conduct here - the most likely scenario is that she was briefed about what was going on with Brittany's family and is just trying to support her.
As for how to support your friend, it's difficult. The best thing to do is respond to her needs - if she wants to talk about things with you, then be avaliable to talk and listen. If, on the other hand, she wants to spend time not thinking about what's happening to her family be prepared to help her take her mind off things her by doing normal things like going shopping and hanging out. There isn't a set formula to what will make her feel better - you just have to be there for her and work with what she wants and needs from you as a friend. Good luck.
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15/f
Hey Im getting braces in a week.. i was wondering if there was anything i should do to prevent the pain.. or to get rid of the pain.. or could somebody jsut tell me how much pain there even really is? cuz i get different answers from like everyone i ask.. i just wanna be prepared. I know i should take advil before getting them put on, and i should bring chapstick with me.. any more advice? Oh and btw.. what color should i get lol i was thinking pink cuz i thought it might be cute? or would pink be too babyish for a 15 yr old? thanks ill rate!!
You should really talk to your dentist/orthodontist about what you can take for the pain, as there is always a potential danger if you mix painkillers of your own with drugs administered by the dentist, such as anasthetics. I'm sure your dentist will say you can take standard painkillers such as paracetomol or ibouprofen, but it's always best to discuss these things with the expert - in this case, the person fitting your braces. As for colours, I think pink would be cute, and it's quite in at the moment, but just go for whatever your most comfortable with and best reflects your personality. :)
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ok these TWO guys like me..... well im not sure about one of them but im definite on the other .... the first guy's name is lets say mike well he likes me... but hes kinda a loser.... plus hes a big jerk.... ya this is the guy who likes me and i no that he does. the second kid lets call him tyler.... im not sure if he likes me but all of my friends say that he flirts with me... but i dont even try to flirt with him!!! so the real question is does he like me??
o ya by the way i sorta have a crush on him but i dont wanna tell my friends bc last yere he wassa humongous loser and now hes all hot and sexy lol!!
plz dont delete this i really need advice!!
~*l0sT aNd CoNfUsEd*~
Neither guy sounds right for you. The first guy can be dismissed immediately - using your own words he's "kinda a loser" and "a big jerk". Tyler sounds a bit more promising, but you don't sound overly keen on him because you used to think he was a loser too. Wait until you find somebody who you really like rather than just rushing in to any old relationship with somebody you don't like that much just for the sake of having a boyfriend.
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Okay so my friend just told me that my other friend got raped about 2 years ago.. and I am just now finding this out. And oh my god, I didn't believe her at first, but I know she wouldn't lie about something like this. Ah I am in total shock, I like still can't believe it. I just don't want to believe it... oh my god but I really need to tell my mom, she's good friends with my friend's mom and she deserves to know. But how in the world do I tell her? I like can't come right out and say it.. ahh I really just want to forget about all this though... HELP!!
I'm sorry to say this, but it isn't your mothers buisness. It isn't fair of you to be telling people about this girl's rape. I know it must be a big shock to you to find out, but that doesn't give you the right to tell whomever you like. Who knows is the girl concerned buisness and nobody elses. If she wants to tell your mother or her mother, it needs to be on her perogative, not just because somebody else felt they should be told. She will tell them when she's ready - it's not up to you to take that away from her.
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I`m a senior in high school. I`m turning 18 soon but my boyfriend will still be 17. If we have sex after my birthday, will that be illegal?
Statutory rape laws are not there for cases like yours - they are there to prevent abusive relationships where an adult has sex with somebody who is much younger than them. There aren't to my knowledge any hard and fast rules about how big the age difference has to be to prosecute, but it would have to be a significant gap to be able to argue that the relationshipw as abusive and the younger person wasn't able to give consent. In short, even if your state does have 18 as the age of consent, it's not going to be an issue.
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Ok i have 3 sisters and 1 brother. My oldest sisteris married and has a daughter who is 2 and her husband has a daughter from a previous relationship who is 6. So im an aunt of 2 and my 2nd oldest sister found out that she was pregnant with her fiance of 6 years. im 14 years old. my sister is almost 5 months pregnant halfway through but she went for an ultrasound one day. she noticed that the baby really didn't move that much so she let the doctors know. her baby was tested positve for spinalbifida which could possibly make the baby never walk. Then she started freakin out and she blamed it on genetics because our cousin has it. so she went to a specialist to find out if the baby had the disease or not. Apparently my mom researched evry symptom that she had with the baby and it turns out the baby has a very rare disease called potters sequence which is where the babies kidneys are to big where they are hard and pushing on the lungs giving no way for a life. the longest the baby can live is probably only a couple of hours. its really tearing my sister apart. and we are real close so its tearing me up b/c she aint talkin to me. What im askin is how do i try to get through to her without makin the situation worse or makin her cry? i really dont know howq to handle this. but i cant just not say nething b/c she needs me she always said i was the best person to talk to. she has always helped me and i just wanna say nething possible to help her. extremaly worried
I'm so sorry, for both you and your sister. Loosing a child is heartbreaking, and it must be incredibly hard on the family as a whole to try and support your siter through this.
I know you want to do as much as you can, but, sadly, there isn't much you can do. Your sister needs to grieve for the baby. Though it is very difficult to watch anyone, let alone people we love, suffering from grief, it is necessary for her to accept things and, eventually and with time, move on. Try to be there for her physically as a shoulder to cry on, but also remember to take care of yourself, as this will also be an emotional period for you where you too need support. I know it's tempting, but don't try and take on too much. You can't just magically make your sister feel better, as much as you'd love too, and if you try and take on too much emotional weight from her when you are still relatively young and ill-equipped to deal with such a tragedy you will hurt yourself even more, which I'm sure your sister doesn't want you to do. The best thing you can do is try to work together as a family to support each other. All the best.
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ok well this ?????? really isnt for me its for my best friend but anywayz. he is having REALLY BIG Trouble wid his gurl friend like i think she is prude or sumthin b/c they have been going out for 6months & they havnt hugged,kissed,made out or anything yet & like today @ da movies he tried to hold her hand & kiss her but she pulled away & leaned away from him da WHOLE! MOVIE! u no the ironiclly thing is me & my g/f r totally fine l0l we r perfect for each otha but anywayz i need some advice to help my frined b/c hes thinkin bout breaking ^ wid her this is serious please help! i'll give u a 5!
sincerely ANTHONY me & my friend r both m/13!
It sounds like your friend and this girl want rather different things from this 'relationship'. It sounds like the girl really isn't ready for any of the physical stuff that comes into a relationship (even kissing and cuddling), whereas her boyfriend wants these things. To be honest, if she's still not wanting these things after 6 months, it's probably because she just doesn't want that level of things at this stage in her life. That's her buisness, she's only young. It definitely doesn't make her a prude if she doesn't want to leap into proper boy/girl stuff when she's only twelve or thirteen.
As for what your friend should do, that depends on how he feels. If he's happy just being good friends with this girl, than he should just continue as he is. If however he really wants more from a relationship, he should explain this to the girl - tell her that though he likes to spend time with her as they have been doing for the past 6 months, that isn't enough to be a relationship for him.
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well..my friend is being really annoying..recently a guy has hurt her..and all she does is talk bout him and its getting very annoying..im tired of hearing about it..i dont want to be mean and tell her to shut up..but what should i do?! help me please!
It sounds like your friend is feeling pretty low. Though high-maintenance friends can be very difficult to deal with when you've heard it 15 times before, the last thing she probably needs is being told that it's getting annoying. Instead, be there for her in other ways than just listening to her talk. Suggest that you do something fun to get her mind of the guy. Take her to the cinema or out somewhere similar and tell her you want her to have a whole day where she's just having fun and not thinking about him. If she then starts to talk about him, remind her that this is supposed to be about her having fun and moving forward, not dwelling on it. Hopefully this will help her move forward and stop thinking (and talking) about this guy so much, and she'll get back to being hte friend you love.
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ok...i have been going out with this guy for about a month now...he has become one of my best friends too...any ways....my friend is all over him ALL the time! she hugs him, holds his hands...and i dont like it...im going out with him not her! im not jealous....i just dont like it! what should i do!?!?!? thank you soooo much!
Talk to your friend. Try to avoid sounding jealous and posessive of your boyfriend, but don't just not say anything if it's making you uncomfortable. Talk to her when there's a quiet moment when it's just the two of you and she doesn't seem to have anything on her mind. Be polite and non-accusitorial - "I don't know what you think about this, but sometimes it makes me feel uncomfortable when your really touchy-feely with (name of boy)" is much better than "You're always flirting with my boyfriend!"
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this gurl likes me but she goes to a different and i want to ask her out wat do i do
Well, how do you normally communicate? If you see each other socially despite not going to the same school then you can take her to one side when your out with friends, chat for a while and then just ask her. If you normally talk online, then try and ask her out over the phone - written communication isn't really desirable as it's much harder to judge how the other person is feeling and so whether they are responding well to you or not.
Good luck1
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this girl i used to be friends with, lets just call her bob, i dont like anymore. shes really annoying and really really nerdy and scary looking and has become really mean. i dont want to hang out with her anymore but she wont leave me alone! what should i do?
It's a tough position to be in - you don't want to be around them, but you don't know how you can dump them without feeling really horrible.
You have to think about it like any relationship. If it isn't working, you owe it to her to let things go. Normally friends just drift apart because there is a mutual understand that they aren't the same people any more, but as this isn't happening in your case (she 'won't leave you alone') you need to say to her, as nicely as you can, that you don't think you are the same people you were when you became friends and that you've moved on and she needs to too. There isn't a nice way to say it, and she will probably be hurt when you tell her, but it's honestly better than just trying to spend less and less time with her when she doesn't understand what changed. Good luck.
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I had a dream about my bestfriend (he's a guy) ok well i had a dream about my bestfiend this is what happened:I the dream we are like 17 or 18 still i high school.(but we really ar 13&14)we were on the phone then he asked me to come over and i did.Then we were in his apartment hanging out.Then this wome around the age of 40 came over.I openedthe doorand then he(my bestfriend) asks me to leave so i do but i come back and i see them 2 having sex!!And when i see him at school (in my dream the next day)im am so mad at im and i yell at him and push him but he is still there then h grabsmy shouldes and looks me in the eye.that all im cofued i dont know why i was s madcn you tell me what this might mean.thanx
It's easy to read meaning into dreams, and someimes analysing them can give you really interesting answers. More often than not however dreams are just your brains way of letting of steam - a collection of random images, things you've been thinking a lot recently and things influenced by what's going on around you (such as a noise in the real world translating into an explosion in your dream).
If you do want to analyse the dream, I'd say that it's not so much what was happening, but how you felt about it. Were you comfortable with your friend when you were together at his apartment? Was there a romantic undercurrent? How did you feel when you 'caught' him in the dream? Jealous? Revulsed? How do you feel when he grabbed hold of you?
Maybe the dream shows that you have strong feelings, either platonic or romantic, for this friend of yours. Maybe it shows that your worried about where your relationship is heading. Honestly though, you are likely to get a much more concrete answer by examining whats in your head now rather than dream. Good luck.
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One of the guys I like is either homosexual or bisexual. I'm slightly homophobic but I really like him a lot. I don't only like him as a crush, but as a friend. I don't know what to do about this, or what to think. Should I continue to let myself like him, or should I try to get over him as quickly as possible and only like him as a friend? I don't know what to do.
To begin with, you need to find out whether he is homosexual or bisexual. If he's gay then you don't realistically have a chance as anything more than good friends. If he's bisexual however you two could have a chance.
Before contemplating a romantic relationship with him you need to deal with your prejudices. I think it's brave of you to admit you do have these mixed, confusing feelings. All I can say is start exploring why you feel the way you do and whether you think that it's an objectively reasonable standpoint. Read one of my favourite articles ever, 'What's wrong with gay sex?' http://www.thinking-big.co.uk/gay_sex.htm Hopefully the more you rationalise and learn the less homophobic you'll become, as you'll begin that people with different sexual preferences are all around you, and aren't really that different to you or I.
If you can't shake the feelings you have, steer clear for a while and give it some time. I know that will be hard, because you can't just switch off feelings you have, but it isn't really fair on him to get close to him when you don't respect the way he is. I hope however that that situation won't arise, and you'll be able to have, at the very least, a great friendship. Good luck!
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I know this is probably the wrong forum, but hey i'll ask my question anyway.
Like millions of other people, i suffer from severe depression. I've tried Zoloft which had a NASTY effect and do not wish to try it again.
Can anyone recommend a good anti-depressant, one that will actually work without the side effects?
I know most of you will reply by saying that i should visit a Doctor. But hey, i don't trust them because they don't know what they're talking about anyway.
Everybody responds differently to drugs. An antidepressant which works well for one person might not work at all for you. Sadly you may just have to try a few until you find one that controls your symptoms with minimal interference to your life.
You do need to visit a doctor though. I've had some hellish doctors, so I know how frustrating it is when they don't appear to listen or pescribe things that just don't worrk, but they do have knowledge that can and will help you, such as which drugs to try if x and y haven't helped or have had negative side effects. It might be an idea to go to a different doctor if your having trouble being taken seriously - it's worth shopping around for one who's both clued up about mental health and cares how the drugs effect you.
It may take a while to find the right solution, but it will happen. You need to keep trying , with the help of your doctors, until you find a solution that works.
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i am the girl that said she was anarexic for six months and was 5'8 and 13 years old... i now weigh 120 pounds cuz i checked into a hospital and they made me gain ALOT of weight... is 120 to fat for a 5'8 13 yr old? my doctor said that that is how much im suppost to weigh since im so tall... but is that still to much?
Your doctor knows best. S/he has your best interests at heart. They aren't trying to make you gain weight for the sake of it, they're doing it because it's good for you. According to www.am-i-fat.com you are still on the thin side and could do with putting on slightly more weight, but I would stick to what your doctor has said over that - 120 is fine, but don't be tempted to loose anything below that.
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I'm 13 years old and a girl, and I'm about 4'1'', and i think 77 lbs. is this average or what? And also, is there anything I can do to help myself grow faster? or 'mature'? I'm not very large chested; I'm about a 32AA, and fairly skinny.
thanks
-short stuff
You are perfectly within normal range, so there is no reason to worry. You cannot make yourself grow up faster, or make yourself taller than you are genetically destined to be. But to be honest, being short isn't that bad. I used to worry about my height all the time, but despite having resolutely stayed 5'1" (and an ickle bit!) since I was about 14, it has become less and less of an issue as I've got older. You'll mature in time and your figure will change, but you may well always be small built. Learn to love the body you have - that confidence is irresistable. Good luck.
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Ok, the guy i like is like 5 feet. give or take a few inches. And i'm like 5 8. It's a HUGE height difference, and idc about looks, but i dont want ppl making fun of him b/c he's going out with a giant or make fun of me for going out with a midget. We're both in 7th grade. I think i should just continue liking him. I think i have a good chance with him. What do u think?
If you like him, there's no point trying to squash down your feelings just because it might be a bit embarassing for him to date somebody taller. You've said yourself that you think you have a good chance with him, so go for it and ignore any comments people might make. Good luck.
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