Question Posted Wednesday November 17 2004, 9:05 pm
One of the guys I like is either homosexual or bisexual. I'm slightly homophobic but I really like him a lot. I don't only like him as a crush, but as a friend. I don't know what to do about this, or what to think. Should I continue to let myself like him, or should I try to get over him as quickly as possible and only like him as a friend? I don't know what to do.
Before contemplating a romantic relationship with him you need to deal with your prejudices. I think it's brave of you to admit you do have these mixed, confusing feelings. All I can say is start exploring why you feel the way you do and whether you think that it's an objectively reasonable standpoint. Read one of my favourite articles ever, 'What's wrong with gay sex?' [Link](Mouse over link to see full location) Hopefully the more you rationalise and learn the less homophobic you'll become, as you'll begin that people with different sexual preferences are all around you, and aren't really that different to you or I.
If you can't shake the feelings you have, steer clear for a while and give it some time. I know that will be hard, because you can't just switch off feelings you have, but it isn't really fair on him to get close to him when you don't respect the way he is. I hope however that that situation won't arise, and you'll be able to have, at the very least, a great friendship. Good luck! [ hailebop's advice column | Ask hailebop A Question ]
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