Ask hailebop!

That sounds like normal discharge. Discharge is just your vagina keeping itself clean and healthy and is absolutely normal and good for your body. It's normal to occur at any time within your menstrual cycle, and can range in colour from clearish to off-white. There is no need to worry about this discharge unless it changes colour (a strong yellor or greenish shade would be concerning) or consistency or has an unusually strong odour, which might indicate an infection and should be checked out by a doctor. If you have particuarly heavy discharge at certain points in your cycle, you can wear a panty liner, but it that's up to you and what you feel most comfortable with. All the best.

Thank you!

Hailey

You do not "owe" your boyfriend oral sex.

You shouldn't be having any sort of sex because you feel you should. If you both want to make this step together, then try it, but please don't feel you have to, now or ever.

Oral sex, like anything sexual, is about exploring what both partners enjoy. Do what comes naturally, and keep doing what works for the both of you. It's not a mechanical process where if you just do x, y and z then you'll be satisfied, it's about finding what works for you as individuals, and enjoying discovering new things about each other and being intimate.

Nigella Lawson has a really great recipe for chocolate brownies, where she recommends as an alternative to nuts putting in half the weight in dried dried fruit. I don't like nuts, so I tried just substituting the same weight of dried fruit for nuts, and it came out perfectly. So just take any brownie recipee you like and substitute the nuts for mixed dried fruits. It should work on any recipe, but look for Nigella Lawson's book 'How to be a domstic goddess' for the origional recipe.

No, they can't tell just by looking at you.

If you have an internal examination by your gyneacologist, they would be able to tell if your hymen is still in tact. Your hymen often breaks when you have sex, so they might guess you were sexually active from that, but many women break their hymens long before they have sex in normal active childhood activity, and so your doctor won't jump to any conclusions even if an internal examination does show that your hymen is broken.

Don't worry though - the doctor isn't really interested in whether you have had sex or not beyond caring about how this can affect your health so they won't particuarly be looking for signs of sexual activity when they examine you. In any case, anything your Doctor discovers or talks to you about is confidential, so, though you might feel a bit embarassed that somebody knows you are sexually active, there's no need to worry that your Doctor will be indiscreet and tell people you don't want knowing, such as your parents.

Your vagina is actually self-cleansing. It actually keeps a very delicate balance to keep itself clean and healthy, so its best to just let it do its thing, and just wash the outside gently, using water and non-fragrance soap. You shouldn't use anything scented near your vagina, even if you are tempted to because of the vagina's natural smell, as the chemicals might upset your bodies natural balance and cause irritation or an infection. Don't be tempted to douche, either - this is horrendously bad for you.

Also, don't worry about the way your vagina smells. The vagina has a natural scent, but it's not something you should worry about. As long as you are keeping the area clean the smell won't be noticeable. All the best.

In all honesty, stretch marks are pretty resilient. A really rich cocoa butter moisturiser applied daily can help them fade a little, but don't expect miracles - they may fade a bit with cocoa butter and time, but they will probably never vanish completely.

It's hard to have to realise that people you care deeply for are actually far from perfect, but this particular guy sounds like a creep. You deserve somebody who loves and respects you as a partner, and sadly, it doesn't sound like this guy does. Even if he doesn't treat you badly all the time, the fact is that he does treat you badly, and shows a basic lack of respect for you when he talks about you in such a horrible way, which is just not something you should be putting up with in a partner. I hate to say it, but it sounds like you dump this guy asap and move on with your life.

If you are annoyed with the girl you told for telling other people, have a quick word with her. You honestly can't take the moral highround and tell her off for spreading rumours, but you can be honest and say your comment wasn't meant to be taken seriously or to get back to the girl, and that if you make a similar comment in future, she should understand that it is just a comment, and not something that should go further than that.

As for the girl in the unflattering top, it might be worth apologising to her if you feel bad about your comment getting back to her. Don't make a big deal out of it, just be honest and say that you know it wasn't a nice thing to say, but it wasn't supposed to be a bitchy thing or something that you intended to be spread around. She probably still won't be delighted with you, but at least you will have stood up and taken responsibility for your actions. Good luck.

I'd wear it up and show off your neck and shoulders with your strapless dress, for a sexy but formal look. Long hair can also end up looking a bit frazzled by the end of an evening dancing if you leave it down, so that's another reason to have it up and off your face.

If the results of the pregnancy test were ambiguous, it's best to get another test. It's best to go to a doctors for a blood test, which is more accurate than an at-home pregnancy test. If she's nervous and finding it difficult, offer to be there with her when she gets the results and support her. Offer to drive / accompany her to the doctors surgery if she goes. She might find it hard to come to terms with being pregnant if she is, and you just need to be there to reassure her that it's alright and that she has your support. If she's in denial about the possibility of pregnancy, she might need a bit of help from you to get her to go to the doctors, but it's really important she gets things confirmed either way as soon as possible so that if a decesion has to be made, she can have time to do so. All the best.

You are normal. It might sometimes feel that everyone in the world has somebody apart from you, but it really isn't true. People grow up differently, and even if you are ready for a relationship, that doesn't mean you just fall in to one. You have to wait for somebody who you like and respect and who likes and respects you to come along and for you to hit it off before you can have a real relationships, and sometimes it takes time before the right situation arises where all the balls fall into place. It will in time, you just have to have faith that there is a guy out there for you somewhere, and embrace opperunities to meet new people. As for flirting, it's just doing what comes naturally with somebody you are attracted to, being outgoing and friendly, and indicating you are interested with your body language, by smiling lots, looking directly at them and smiling whilst you talk, and friendly touching, such as their back or arms.

You'll get the best and fastest results by doing your hair in sections systematically. Put most of it up, leaving only the bottom layers down. I'm assuming you have hair straigteners (these are much easier than blow-drying your hair every day!) but if you are blow-drying with a hair dryer and a round brush directed down the shaft of the hair then the principle is the same - start on the bottom layers of your hair, straigten sections of about an inch wide all round your head, then let down some more hair and straigten that. Repeat until you've done your whole head. You should spend the most time on the last layers that you do, as these will be the most noticeable. It's very tempting to try and straigten really big sections at the same time as a time saver, but this actually just means you have to go over the area more times, which is (a) bad for the hair and (b) actually ends up taking longer.

I think you have a good and relevant idea, but because it is a potentially sensitive topic for some of the people you are speaking to, you need to substantiate it a little to avoid just making weak assertions that will stir up some mixed responses.

The problem with talking about a subject you really believe in is that it's easy to go off on a tangent when it's not 100% relevant, and this won't earn you points, so have what you are going to say particuarly carefully planned. If you are going to include political-sensitive topics, you also have to be careful about possibly offending people, or stiring up trouble. Keep you argument succint and reasonably neutral. Try to avoid blanket statements along the lines of 'the government shouldn't ban books with homosexual characters because there is nothing wrong with homosexuality', as any one who disagrees with you on that point (and sadly, there are far too many...) will just shoot you down. Instead try to keep things more neutral and keep to claims about what it is and isn't appropriate for the government to be censoring, and that they shouldn't censor literature from young readers simply because of personal preference or tryign to control young people's developing political beliefs. You could also argue that it is religious reasons (you know, the "in Leviticus it says..." type thing) that are used as arguments against homosexuality, and that these should never be used to back up government policy shouldn't be based on religious claims in a secular government. These type of arguments keep the central question about book banning at the centre and arguments about homosexuality perpheral, which will help you stay focused and avoid confrontation about your choice of subject. Good luck.

Well, there is no guaranteed way to make somebody fall for you, but as a general rule: be yourself, be friendly, smile, pay her attention and be sincere in any compliments. Not all women like over the top romance, but everyone likes to feel special, appreciated and interesting. If you talk to her, listen to what she says and make her laugh, you will be doing well. Look at her face and in to her eyes when you are talking to her. Don't fiddle with things you are holding or keep glancing around the room - these are natural things to do if you are nervous, but won't give the best impression of yourself. Yes, compliment her, but be sincere. Don't just churn out something cheesy about her eyes or how she looks nice - pick something about her that you find particuarly attractive - her hair, the freckles on her nose, her outfit - it doesn't matter, as long as it's honest and from *you*, not just a rehearsed compliment. If it's honest and genuine, it'll feel much better and she is more like to pick up on that and respond. Overall however, just be yourself and have the confidence to go up to her and talk to her and show her who you are and that you are interested in her.

It depends on the guy. You want to find somebody who's of similar maturity to you. If you are mature for your age, you probably find guys your age too immature for you, as guys tend to mature slower than women do anyway. The danger is that if you look to older guys you find that they have different lifestyles (this will even be an issue with college students or people who have left school and working full time, who are only a year or two older than you), experiences and expectations, and this can be a recipee for disaster. 18 year olds would be good for you, as, being still in High School, as I presume you are, they're in a similar life stage to you, but you've found these guys to be unsuitable. 19 or 20 year olds are probably more what you are looking for maturity-wise, but age is a potentially hot issue even with this relatively small gap. But, as I said, it depends on the guy. I wouldn't advise looking at anyone much over 20, but be open-minded: not all older guys are creepy leches, but similarly, not all younger ones are immature jerks. Just be careful and don't rush in to anything with somebody who is in a very different place in their life to where you are in yours - think before you jump.

In my opinion, there is no 'right' age to loose your virginity. It's all just about when you feel you are ready and happy to make the choice to have sex. Of course, the younger you are, the harder it is for you to weigh up the choices you have, as you may lack the necessary life experience to know what will be best for you. However, I think that's an argument against people younger than you having sex. You are different from a 12 year old or even a 15 year old in your ability to assess the long term consequences of your actions and make the choice that is right for you, so if you've looked at it and are sure you want to have sex, then that isn't a choice you should be ashamed of. That's not to say that no 15 year old is mature enough to make the right decesion or every 17 year old is, but if you think you are ready to make the decesion, then you are probably the best judge of what you should do. You do sound confident in your love for this guy and trust in him, but you do obviously have some reservations about your age still, so I suggest waiting as long as necessary to ease any worries you have about that, so you can make the decesion that's right for you and be happy with it. All the best.

I checked out your account and you certainly appear to qualify for modship. The button is supposed to tell you why you don't qualify if you don't, so it sounds like a bug to me. Try again tomorrow in case it's some weird thing about needing 31 days, but if it's still acting up, buzz advicenator_admin, MFS, FernGully or Draak and they should be able to see what the issue is.

As others have said, it's normal for your periods to be irregular sometimes. Even those who are blessed with predictable cycles occassionally have off months where their body behaves differently. Are you under stress? Have you changed your diet recently? Have you been travelling (I always find that long-distance travel plays absolute havoc with my cycle. I hate flying for this reason)? There are many reasons why your body could be behaving differently, so don't worry. If things don't return to your normal pattern next month and you are concerned, have a word with your doctor for reassurance, as they'll be able to talk through anything specific about your lifestyle that might cause erratic periods suddenly - but otherwise, don't worry.

I know a couple of people who have apparently happy relationships where there is a large age gap, but I think it is niave to believe that age isn't an issue. Your gap isn't enormous, but it is definitely significant, and I'd tread carefully. It's not so much about age as where you are in your lives. Even if you are very compatible personality wise, it's easy for the age difference to become a tension point if you want different things because you are in different places because one of you has graduated and working full time whilst the other is still a student. Working means that he has additional pressures which he may feel you don't fully understand because you aren't in the same world as he is. Similarly, you are at a stage where it's important to be enjoying your time as a student and going out with your college friends, whereas he might not have time for partying any more. These are by no means insurmountable issues, but they (and similar issues) may well arise, and the sensible thing is to ask yourself i this is going to be a big problem for you. If you are obviously very different in maturity and where you are in your lives, then perhaps its best to leave the relationship for now, but if you are mature and he's flexible, there's no reason why you shouldn't try if you want to. All the best.