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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!

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I'm 15 and I plan to ask this guy named Gus that I really like to go see a movie or something so we can pursue a relationship, but I know for a fact that another girl likes this guy and she's known him for three years and never had the courage to ask him out and I've only known him for a few months. I think that he likes me though and only views her as a little sister type person. If he says yes I'd feel so guilty about doing this to her but I'll end up feeling that way if Gus starts dating someone else because I waited too long. So should I go ahead and ask Gus out and just let the girl move on or do I just stay friends with him?

People in general are not very attracted to others who lack self confidence, are too shy, cus they plain old don't stand out much and there's nothing about them to catch our interest.
When it comes to relationships, if the individual is not married, dating, in a committed relationship with someone, then they are currently available. It wouldn't matter if a dozen girls liked him but never asked him out, the only girl, he is going to get to know is the one who asks him.
High school boys have little or no relationship skills, or self confidence at first but they can improve. Most girls are not going to want to wait a long time for a guy to finally be ready to ask first. Girls already have some relating skills as far as friendships with other girls and can teach the guy a thing or two. The most successful relationship you will have with a guy is the one who can become like a best friend to you, like one of your female friends, but the added benefit of attraction and romance is there and that's what you're looking for. Not every person you try dating will work out, but thats what dating is for to find out more things about each other. The personalities could be too different, lack of attraction after the initial excitement of new relationship wears off and thats good reason to end and move on. It doesnt mean you failed if you arent a good match and break up. You fail if you end up staying together when you have nothing in common and no attraction. If the two of you don't end up working out, thats okay. Maybe then he will feel bold enough to ask the other girl who's secretly liked him.She may not turn out either, then again she might. There is no 'one type fits all' when it comes to relationships. The perfect date partner is going to vary as much as everyones unique personalities. This doesn't mean that there is only one perfect girl for Gus, he may come across a handful in his life but the one he dates is going to be the one who asks him.

Hey there..
My boyfriend and I will mark 2 years in the next two weeks. However, something doesn't feel right and I get the feeling that we are hanging by the thread.
He seems distant of late. He has been going through some rough patch, which I understand.He has opened up to me and I know he has been honest.
My problem is, we have discussed his way of handling things and the fact that it doesn't sit well with me. Normally,he just goes silent.He even switches his phone off with no warning. What's left is me trying to get through to him and all he does is ignore until whenever it suits him. We had a talk the last time he did this, and I expressed why it hurts me to not be able to help him and instead get shut down like the rest of the people.
It hasn't taken long for him to do the same.
I have tried to call him now for almost two days. He has ignored my facebook and whatsapp messages. I had his brother inform him that I was trying to get through to him, but he still did not see the need to respond to that.
Mean while, the reason for calling was because I was also going through some trouble and he was aware of it. He had opened himself up to me and made himself available if I need to talk. That upsets me, because not only do I not have a friend in my current state, but I also cannot be a friend to him.

How do you leave someone who isn't available? Should i just write an email? Maybe he'll respond to that and see the magnitude of his actions.

If thats your only option, write an email. If your mind is made up to leave him now, then leave. If you want to better understand why this is happening and what the goal should be, read some of my thoughts here:

I don't know your ages of if either of you have dated much before. Perhaps due to his age, he's still fairly immature.

I will say that some girls feel that the amount of time they try contacting a boyfriend is normal when to others watching or the guy himself, it's pretty excessive.
However, if a guy is really into a girl and is the talkative, communicative type he will be eager to chat and keep in contact.
I understand that having something stressful going on can upset a person so they aren't quite themselves. It is during times like this that they need to communicate if they need some time to themselves to get over it, while other people instead of wanting to be alone, want to have others around to help boost their spirits and lean on for a bit.
If the two of you can't find even ground, it wont get better over time without anything changing.

Then again, perhaps changing would mean trying to be someone you are not, just to please the other. It's always possible that these are not the only differences between you two and that you aren't the best match for each other. You will know at what point you have fully tried every to work the relationship out, as long as he is putting in equal effort, it wont work if its one sides with you doing all the effort to make things work.

Long married couples are not immune from stress or going through something like let say: losing a family member to death. It is in a perfectly functioning marriage that when one is down or suffering, the mate happens to be strong and steady and can help the other. It's not one supporting the other forever, but a give and take, each finding times they are helping the other or helped by the other. You need to have that type of thing working in your dating relationship now because in long time relationships of dating or marriage, it isn't going to all of a sudden start happening. What you see is what you get. Most people do not change much of their character and personality. By age 30 we have pretty much defined who we are as an individual. Any time leading up to that point, we are still naive, immature, inexperienced, and not quite sure of who we really are and still trying to 'find' and discover ourselves.
If he is naturally a quiet guy, and you are more outgoing and talkative, it can be a challenge but do-able. Myself, being very open and communicative, I couldnt be with a guy who is the silent uncommunicative type. I met a guy once who was just like that. By the end of the coffee date, I told him it wasn't going to work.
If he has been open and communicative before and it all of a sudden changed, then it's not who he is normally as a personality, but something that is causing him to change, or he is choosing to become that way for a reason. If you are a top priority for him then he should be willing to at the very least communicate with you. Dating is learning who is best for you, improving with your next partner until you find the one you want to be with life long. Its like practice and lead up to marriage. So if he can not or will not allow you to be his best friend, and trust you enough to reveal his most intimate secrets and feelings, and is fearing being judged or thought less of or loved less, then he is not good relationship material. Everyone has to be willing to trust and be best friends with each other to make a relationship work. You may want to write a long letter using some of what I shared to put in your own words as to why it is important that you hear from him and you both have some indepth talk and get to the bottom of what is REALLY going on. If he doesnt respond, then certainly leave. He doesnt have to see your message or respond for it to end. All it takes is you leaving and its done. Cus he cant have a relationship with an absent partner anymore than you can with him making himself scarce.

So over a month ago, me and my best friend has a pointless argument. We both said some pretty hurtful words. She said she would never talk to me again. I thought she didn't mean it because she always eventually talked to me but.. I haven't heard of her since the end of July.

I miss her so much. I don't go to her school, she changed her number, I don't know her address.. I just miss her so much and there's literally nothing I can do. What should I do? What CAN I do?

I am sorry to hear this. There is nothing you can do but try making contact every once in a while, the old way, sending cards in the mail, for birthday, Halloween, Christmas, whatever occassion. Let her know you are always open to having her back as a friend. No discussing of what happened before, no apologies or blaming, just know you'll always be my friend in my heart whether you reciprocate or not.

My first guess would have been that her severe anger is due to the overload of hormones when puberty hits but I imagine she must be your age. SO this could be due to the immaturity that comes with this age. Not trying to single her out from others as being immature...all teens have this issue, we do until we get past age 25 when the frontal lobe of our brain finishes growing. Before then, we make a lot of poor judgements and decisions because of it.

I am a 23 year old female and I am wondering if anyone has ever felt this way, or even what I can do in the situation that I am going through.

Since October of 2013 I have been unable to hold down a job. I hold a strong value on being successful, and this is an area where I am experiencing a great deal of turmoil.

As much as I love my boyfriend knowing that he is being told that he has done so well on his internships makes me kind of jealous. It is not that I do not want him to do well, but I am so used to being the successful one in the relationship. This time the tables have turned.

Over the summer I worked two jobs and they both let me go. Before offering me the first job, the officer manager had explained to me that she did not know how long it would last. Sure enough, it only lasted me two days even though I was doing such a fabulous job and they told me that they would put my resume on hold. Ironically when I saw a job advertised in the paper by another company located in the same office, I was not even considered for the position.

I was terminated from my last job last week after three weeks of working there. The week before my supervisor had said that the team leader said that I was doing a good job, but that she (my supervisor) sensed tension between me and one of her other employees which I assured her of that there wasn't.

A week later I was fired, because I wasn't a good fit for the position apparently. Although when I asked the HR manager exactly what I had done wrong, she kept on repeating that same phrase over and over again. My analysis is that they decided that our personalities clashed too much. Another theory that I have is that they really didn't like that I had to ask to come in half an hour later than they had originally scheduled me for, and that I could no longer work there full time.

In between these two opportunities I kept on going for job interviews. Most of the hiring managers seemed to be interested in me as a candidate, and really liked me but for whatever reason they chose not to hire me.

The only thing that I am sure of is that I am a good student and that my boyfriend (maybe also his mother too, but I feel like she and his aunt both know that the two of us will get married one day), my cat, and my best friend really love me, to the point where I believe that they have too much confidence in me.

All that I want is to graduate from college, find a stable job, my own place and to marry my boyfriend. Not being able to maintain a steady job terrifies me because I am so worried about the prospect of finding a job after college. Has anyone else been in the place that I am currently in?

I've not been to college but I've been without work. It is scary not knowing how things are going to turn out but living in fear of the worst will hold you back from pursuing anything too.
I see two issues. Your questions as to loss of job. and your competitive spirit and jealousy of boyfriend.

I am speaking of serious relationships, committed ones in dating and the life long partners: this kind of partner is not someone to be in competition with...ever! The two become one unit, like a mini team and there is a certain synergy created where the two if working together truly for the same purpose and goals can accomplish the work of 3 people. You are going to need to learn how to deal with feeling you have to be better than everyone else or you will have many failed relationships and have trouble holding on to any jobs that require team work.
As for why you were let go, companies understand the synergy of people truly working together as a team. More gets accomplished on the job, more problems solved and people enjoy the experience because there is no competition to outdo each other but collectively accomplish something that they can take pride in together.
You can say the words and even go through the motions, but most people have an ability to pick up on things unseen, like the energy waves coming off a person, It can be positive, negative, competitive, jealous, indifferent, etc... So it was something they sensed or felt. Only empaths are sometimes better at picking up on something and knowing what it actually is. Most people just sense and avoid something they don't feel totally comfortable with...like a person's 6th sense. I am sure you are a very lovely person but people dont generally like having to be in relationships or work close with a person who is choosing to remain aloof, apart from them and compete with them. There is lack of good bonding between you and others in relationship or work. I could be totally wrong dear, and sorry if so. But I am simply going by the words that you actually wrote.

There is something deeper to a need to compete and jealous if you perceive someone to do betther than you. Do you perhaps have a poor self image, perhaps struggles with feelings of being accepted and liked. There could be a whole passel of things that contribute to the fact that you feel compelled to compete. Some jobs do want the competors, the cut throat people who will step on many people and hurt, cheat, lie to get ahead. But once you do get to the top, it is a very lonely place to be and your accomplishments will pale in comparison.

Everyone is saying my bestfriend likes me because of the way he acts and the way he talks to me were really close and I chilled with him all weekend this weekend and actually slept in the same bed with him twice and Saturday morning after a party he tells me he was about to kiss me the night before...BUT! He was talking to a girl then and on Labor Day he asked her out.. So does he like me? Or not?

You'd need to ask him that. But I would only ask if I had feelings for him that go beyond just 'friends'. Because if he said yes, and you did not, then there really was no purpose to stirring something up that you are unable to follow through ob.
If he is asking other girls to date, then either he currently is only interested in you as just a friend, or he may have feelings for you but be afraid to ask if you do for fear of losing you as a friend if you don't, or for fear that he doesn't have a chance with you, because of the vibes or body language you give off. ..meaning, there's been no sign from you that you are interested to encourage him that way. You may think it and feel it in your heart but he's not a mind reader so he doesnt know. Best thing is to come out and ask, no guesswork.
Do you have any feelings for me beyond just friends? or if you are falling for him that way, then say, I feel like I am beginning to fall for you. Dont say I love you or I fell in love with you...its a message that feels threatening if the other person isn't there yet, uncomfortable that they aren't. Making it sound as the beginning of a process makes the other person feel they have wiggle room out if needed.
However, if he said he was tempted to kiss you, it could be because he is curious to see how it would feel between you. Would it feel like kissing a sister, a friend or a girlfriend.

Did you ever think that its easier for him to ask another girl out simply because he doesnt care about her and he doesnt care if she rejects him. The fear of rejection could be holding him back. Asking a girl out could be a weird way to try to make you jealous so that something happens that brings you two together...not the best way to go about it if so, it usually backfires.

The fact he asked another girl out does not mean it is a committed relationship unless in that first conversation he has promised to date only her if she accepted. Chances are he is still available to ask out if you think you can do it.

If too chicken, just think of how you will be still feeling decades from now looking back, always wondering if there could have been something together. Go for it and ask him.

Im 23 year old business woman. And im living with my boyfriend because im pregnant. I earn more than my bf with my business. And it bothers me sometimes how he treats me. He loves me but he dont want to hang out with me. Was it his ego? On his troops. He is a boss. He could boast his self to them and everyone get jealous over him. Because he is on top. But with me he feels small. Because i earn more of our living. Is this the reason why he dont want me to hang out with them? Because of this silly ego. Because he dont want to be laughed at because im more productive than he do? Will i talk this one out to him without hurting his pride? How? We only spend few moments together even if we live in the same roof because he wants to be on his troops where he is the boss.

I am going to go through your message piece by piece to make sure we dont miss anything. You are living with him because you're pregnant with his child? Are you implying that if you were not pregnant that you would not be living with him? I don't know your living situation alternatives but if you are choosing to settle for living with someone only because they fathered a child with you, thats not a good enough reason. He must be the perfect person for you, someone you can envision yourself married to for the next 30+ years without a thing about him changing. If not, he's the wrong person to be in relationship with, let alone living with, no matter if you are pregnant or not. He can still provide child support from outside a relationship with you.

You earn more with your business. You tossed that fact in before getting to making guesses that he is bothered by it. So I can not say that your earning more than him is causing him to feeling inferior. You don't know that unless he is willing to come out and share that. If your relationship isn't such that you have that kind of trust in each other to be able to share Anything and willing to share Anything with each other, then you are missing out on something very special and your relationship is not going to be able to obtain the kind of intimate depth to it that makes a relationship last life long.

Next, It bothers you how he treats you. You did not go into detail or give any examples but your next sentence tells me he doesnt want to hang out with you. Not wanting to hang out with you at times can be a far cry from a man treating you badly. It could be a combination of many bad traits and could run as serious as emotional and physical abuse. I dont know if there is more to be concerned about and you just shared the ego part or if that is all. If it doesnt bother you at all that he doesnt earn as much as you, as long as he's not bothered by the difference in earnings, I see no problem.
You mention 'troops'?? So you are saying he has a higher rank in one of the armed forces. People look up to him, makes him feel good.
Well there are a couple of things to understand about males. First, males are made to protect and provide for a female. So one of the things that a man finds a big part of his life is what he does to earn a living, his vocation. All men are closely tied to it, so much that a loss of job can devastate him and tilt his world out of order.

Men like to be useful and feel needed. One way is by 'bringing home the bacon.' If due to his choice of vocation he earns less, then he will need to hear from you consistently what you appreciate about him. Find things that you cant do, or don't like doing and ask him if he would do it for you. A man needs to know his lady needs him for more than just the money he brings home. If he is a well balanced person to begin with, not suffering low self confidence, the average guy can flourish and bloom under the praise and filling needs of his lady.

You said he feels small. Did he say that to you...is he communicating how he feels? You cant know how he feels unless he is telling you, actions can back up words spoken but actions alone can be misleading. I doubt he's told you anything if you are wondering if it is his Ego.

Now you tell me he doesn't want you hanging out with 'THEM', meaning him and his buddies from the armed forces? Wait, I thought you said he didn't like to hang out with You? Does he actually hang out and go places with you, just the two of you? Does he come home to hang out with you? that is something totally different from hanging out with his buddies. Men need their cave time, time alone, and they need their time hanging out just with the guys, just as women have times they hang out with other females.
If he doesn't spend any time alone with you hanging out, then likely he doesn't love you anymore. He can say he loves you but his actions speak louder than words. If the guys he hangs with are bringing their girlfriends and wives and he's the only one who won't, then yes, there is a problem in your relationship. Is it ego? I dont know. But for some reason he isn't enough in love with you to want to proudly show you off as being his by simply having you at his side. My husband doesnt like to go run errands by himself even, wanting me along because he says, "He wants the general world to see the wonderful woman he has in me, that he loves showing me off. Thats how it should be. So if this is the problem, you both should talk about it. If he is unwilling to talk, you'll need to set an ultimatum, be willing to talk and work on the relationship, maybe with some professional relationship counseling, or the relationship since its going nowhere, must end. If you can't be willing to do the hard thing in case he is so wrapped in ego that he makes the relationship dysfunctional, then you have no reason from this point on to complain about it, just grin and bear it.
If he truly fears being laughed at, then it means he isn't able to take a little ribbing or teasing. Could be he's too serious, no sense of humor, feelings are too sensitive because of some bad memory or experience in his past in childhood, or he may be too prideful and you know what happens to those with pride? Pride goeth before a fall. if its pride, sooner or later it will cause him to mess up royally.
How to talk to him, if he's never home, it may have to be done by phone. Write him a letter? You first ask to have some time to have a talk with him in person--make an appointment with him if thats the only way to get it done, tell him you want a serious heart to heart talk. You might even put your ultimatum in here if he balks at it, and say that this relationship is important to you and you love him but the relationship has issues that you see. HAVE

First ignore my grammar. Im from Phil. 23 years old. Eldest of our family. Since the day my mom proved that their marriage with my father is not legal. She starts getting relationship out of so many guys on the internet like 6 of them. She is a teacher and i know its very unprofessional. But the worst scenario is my father works abroad and send us money monthly only. My dad knows all about it but keep it on his self even if it hurts him so bad. My dad never fails to support my siblings. But my mom did. I dont know where are all her salary gone. I dont live with them anymore because im together with my boyfriend. It bothers me everytime my sister will visit me and ask for money because she dont have any allowances anymore. My mom never gave my siblings any. I am pregnant now and im earning for my future family. I support the 3 of my siblings allowances but the more i support them the more my mom fails to take her responsibility. All our bills left unpaid at home. My sisters tuition fee at college left unpaid too. I dont know where are all her moneys are. My dad now sends the money directly to me because she never trusts my mom anymore. I spent the money to my siblings and could give them more than what my father sends me. It hurts to see my mom on this mid life crisis on her life because she never listens and she never admitted she is wrong, what should i do for her to listen? That everything is wrong. That whatever problem they had with my father they must not forget the responsibilities on their children. I dont want to stress myself but i cant help it. And im worried that it might affect my baby growing on my womb if my mom would continue her negligence. Im the eldest so all of this bothers me. I cant have a family of my own because i cant even find a family on our home :(

You did say Dad now sends money to you. I assume this is money for the care of siblings who are not adults yet, not 18. And yes his money sent home should have gone to take care of children and bills. You may never know where the money went but thats in the past. Mom may have given birth to you all but whether she chooses to be a good mother or a good wife is entirely her choices to make and just because a person is an adult does not mean that they make good choices. Sometimes a person can be an adult in age but extremely childish and selfish.
Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do to get her to listen to any solid advice from you or anyone else, even a counselor, because change doesn't come from the outside, only from a will to change on the inside.
Now as for your situation, Your stress can be transferred to baby and what you end up with is a baby who is fussy, never content even if there is nothing wrong cus it has learned to pick up on your stress and that is all it knows if you were stresses all 9 months, not just a one time deal like a week. You can't place blame on mom as harming your baby because she isn't, it is a secondary indirect event. In your life, stress can come from many other sources, even if you had the worlds most perfect mom. It is for you to find ways to deal internally with the stress.
Your last sentence makes no sense to me. You can't have a family? You mean of your own? Yes you can and you are cus you are pregnant with your first child. If you mean siblings, you will still have siblings, no matter what mom does,unless they are all dead, they are still your family.If dead they WERE your family

So again you did not make sense. You can't find family in your home? Either people are living in mom's house or they aren't. You dont mention a husband. So I must assume you are living in moms house and so you are the one paying the house bills and giving money out to siblings...basically being the banker of the family. As long as mom is living there, she can continue to influence things negatively. If she isn't caring to stick with her marriage vows, then there's no reason why Dad can not divorce her and put the house in the name of any adult children to keep the family together without mom living there any longer. As long as she is on the title of the house and has say as to what happens with it, it's not a good position for you children. That I can see being stressful. Though becoming the home owner as adult children, You and any over 18 siblings would have control of the house too not just the money. I see no purpose actually for your mom to be there anymore. She isnt taking care of the kids, running of the house or finances, and she might have a marriage certificate but isnt acting as if married. Hopefully she doesnt bring all these boyfriends into the house...not a safe situation for any of your sisters. Have Dad look into getting a divorce from her and having her move out... so that she can't sabotage anything with the house... and have lawyers make sure the house goes into a child or a couple chidrens names to keep for the children until the youngest are adult and everyone has moved out. Then the house sale should be split between all the siblings.
If you have anything to add or clarify let me know, otherwise this is the best I can help with how I interpreted what you wrote.

There's this teacher in my school. She's 43. I'm bad at math so I have to stay after a lot. Every time I do, she makes me sit across her table. Her legs always touch mine. I move back, and she responds saying she won't bite. When she sits next to me, she holds my inner thigh. I may just be not used to touch. But, what do you think?

Your body is your own property, the one thing you have all right and say over what happens to it. If it makes you uncomfortable for anyone to touch you in any type of way, whether innocent or not, you have a right to say, "That makes me feel uncomfortable. Please don't continue to do that. If in a situations where a certain time period is not over, such as with this teacher and she had heard you but keeps touching, You can say, I don't think you heard me, look at me. Once you have eye contact, repeat your request and say "I will not ask again. If it persists, you get up and walk out and walk straight to the principals office or if they're not there, find any other adult you can at the moment. When asked to stop and someone continues, it can be considered 'harassment' and that is a situation that is taken seriously.

She may be a mom with kids your age and you might remind her of one of hers so she feels friendlier towards you. Even an encouraging pat on the shoulder can be uncomfortable to some when it means no harm. But touching someones thigh, which is a body part close to ones private area is very questionable. Depending on who is looking at your situation, some would say it is clearly sexual harassment and others would say not. But that doesnt matter, all that matters is you tell someone not to touch you and all is well if they stop and apologize and it doesnt happen again.

I will now explain another matter I feel may be related.
I had a co worker who I tried to get her attention once by tapping her on the shoulder. She reacted by cringing away and wheeling her chair away with a loud command to not touch her nor get that close to her. I apologized and made sure never to repeat that. Otherwise she was friendly as long as you gave her, her personal space. Peoples bodies have an energy field that extends several feet beyond them. It is this energy field that tells you when someone is standing close behind you even though you don't cognitively know they are there, but it is picked up by your energy field. The closer a person gets to another, the stronger they can feel the others energy and depending on how sensitive one person is versus another, even without any physical touch, someones presence close by can feel very disturbing to an individual and again, they have every right to ask someone to not stand too close to them because it's still their personal space, just not their body. This is more difficult to get a person to stop doing or complain about because most people only consider the touching of another person without permission to be wrong.
If you're too chicken to say anything to her, then tell your parents and have one of them talk to her but it is important that some thing be said, communicated and this not go by ignored.

Good luck dear.

i have been single for almost two years not literally single but i haven't had any serious relationship, its either the guy likes me and i don't or i like him and his not ready, or he has a girlfriend... so i would call it two years of being single since my last relationship i work in a company were i was introduced to a guy. His exactly what i want in a guy. he acts really nice to me, for example when i needed a flash to get movies and i asked his colleague who had offered to give me a flash earlier and didn't latter, he offered his own without my asking, and told me that i could use it for as long as i like, whenever he comes to work he smiles at me and sometimes i catch him staring... i like this guy, but i don't know if he feels the same way, his currently out of the country and would be back next week, i recently found out that he is single.How do i initiate something that would lead to what i want, without seeming desperate. we not so much of friends, neither do we talk frequently and his a very busy person.

It doesnt change much from middle school to our adult life, guys will still give off the same clues that they are attracted. One is the smiling alot at you, saying Hi, or finding any opportunity that seems natural to say something to you (which he did offering his flash)
Guys will also stare lots if they have no clue how to proceed. They will also look for reasons to get close to you, standing near, being near you in any way. And it would seem that there are still a few guys who hold back and do not do enough to get the ball rolling as far as checking out a girl any further.

At this level, you're at the very beginning, where there is attraction between two people, and I also call it surface level interest. This means that neither person knows yet if they are going to 'Like' the other person as well once they get beyond 'surface level'.

Sometimes we are confused and believe that a person likes us if they ask us to hang out with them or go on a date. We never think to clarify our actions. And that can make all the difference from it feeling awkward and wondering if the other person will expect too much, like "Are we dating? Is this a relationship? Are we a couple?
Dating is for the purpose of getting to know a person better, it doesnt mean you like them yet, you are in fact in the process of determining whether you actually do have enough in common and like their personality enough to want to spend more time with to get to know them even deeper. So then you agree to date, and once both develop feelings for each other, you become a couple and have a committed relationship. If you for example made yourself clear when approaching him that you are enjoying him as a co-worker and would like to hang out with him a bit to see if you have anything in common to at least become friends if nothing more, but more would be welcome. You dont know if you both will like each other beyond the work relationship but you;re open to trying. That way you are making it clear that you don't like him, you're just attracted and that you arent expecting feelings, dating and commitments right off the bat.

I understand about not wanting to appear desperate. A desperate woman is one who won't take no for an answer and keeps asking. She keeps placing herself in his path, calling him, offering him what ever he wants, even to the point of sex to get his attention. She will even follow him around uninvited, may even try to fight off other women who take an interest in him.

Asking someone out is not something that can be labeled 'desperate' just cus the female did the asking instead of the guy.
Something that all men find attractive in a woman is her having self confidence, knowing what she wants and not being afraid to ask for it or go after it.
You did say "He's exactly what I want in a guy." He may seem so but I know plenty people who act one way in school or at work and totally different when away. When in public, they are putting on an act, a false identity and it's when you hang with them 24/7 in different situations, day or night, to know what they are like when happy, sad, angry, stressed, upset, fearful, etc...and how that might affect you. It's in these times spent with them that you discover who a person is at core--meaning the ideals a person stands for, their beliefs, their hopes, dreams, what drives them, their personal passions, etc.
You need to know and discover all that to be able to determine if he is really 'exactly perfect for you'.
To know who is right for you, you need to understand yourself really well first. Not a list of your accomplishments, your schooling, and such but who you are at core for it will color everything you ever approach in life, try, and the outcomes, its going to influence what your passions are. To give you an idea, I am a 'nurturing' person and a 'Creative' person. Those two qualities are what touch other peoples lives, what I am passionate about and where my talents are. I would not be donating time on an advice column if I were not a nurturing type or creative in writing.

So dear, next make your list of what you need from a guy and what your wants are. For example, it is not wrong to spell out IN detail at the very beginning what you are looking for in a guy. Ask him what he would consider the ideal girlfriend for him to be. You are meeting as coworkers to see if you can become friends at least. friendship is an important need in long term relationship. The feelings develop if the chemistry is strong and the sexual part is something you have in common, same libido, fetishes if any, etc.
Lets say its very important to you to have your own kids one day. You wouldn't want to date for a year only to find out after falling for a guy that he is adamant about not ever having children cus he came from a large family of 8 kids and is sick and tired of kids always being around. I actually knew of someone like that in church.
So either he knows he is interested in having kids, once he finds the right gal but is not ready to have any for a couple years yet also, OR he is not interested. This you would list as a need. A need is something that is missing, is a deal breaker, you wont date him and risk falling in love with someone who had too many differences from you. I had a list like this I put on a dating site and thats how I found my 2nd husband. I can't say how many guys were attracted to me, evne tho not right for me, simply because I knew what I wanted and spelled it out at the start. If they were not willing to bend to meet my requirements, they knew I would not consider them. Some lied until we met face to face hoping I'd be hooked by then and willing to overlook their shortfalls. The lying was another thing I would not tolerate, especially not from a man meant to become my best friend. the wants, are the frosting on the cake, not necessary, not a deal breaker. Like my wishing for a guy with long hair. It wasn't necessary so I did not put this list on the dating web site. However, if its something you like, lets say you have a thing for hazel colored eyes and his happen to be that color, then make sure he knows it. Let him know how you love his eyes, that hazel is your favorite eye color, its so attractive to you.

You did say you want something serious, right? Thats why I am going into detail on so much more than you probably figured you needed to know just to take the next step of asking him out. You can of course ask him out without considering any of this, but that's like trying to drive in a soupy fog, you really have no idea where you're going, where you are sometimes, what is out there that you haven't seen yet, what dangerous things might lie hidden ahead. That to me describes a lot of relationships today, not knowing what the status of their interest level is, where is the relationship going, what things that might be undesirable lie hidden in him, waiting to come to the surface and surprise and maybe hurt you.
It is good to start at seeing if you can become friends as you said you currently are not friends, just friendly at work. Hope this helps explain some things. If you find him or another guy some day sounds promising, and you've been meeting as friends just share what your ideal partner would be, and thats the time to share your list in bits and pieces, it doesnt have to be all at once. aSK him to share more in detail about anything that you don't know yet if it fits your list of priorities. If a guy ever asks you why you have a list of things you need in a relationship and seem to be picky or anal about it, You simply say, I know what I want and am not afraid to ask for it and go after it. I won't settle for less, thats why I ask. If you can't handle that, then you're obviously not going to work out for me.
Good luck.

M/16
So today one of my freinds straight up said he hates gay people. Well I'm gay but I havent come out yet and I always thought so did most of our other freinds that he was bi. What he said hurt me and it dosnt make sense to me. He's not a religious person at all so he dosnt really have a religious reason. Mabey he's just trying to fit in at school. We do go to a pretty homophobic school. It just dosnt make sense to me.

teens often make a decision, a judgement or such with out thinking them through well. In judgements aspects of why they believe it to be so are not given any thought, so it is a blind judgement, right off the top of their head. As far as decisions, teens get into sticky situations with terrible consequences cus they don't think things through and never consider all possible outcomes and their consequences. It is something that comes with the territory. there are always a few mature teens, I was one of them but the majority suffer from something we pretty much all go through, having bodies that mature before our brains. the Frontal lobe of the brain doesnt finish growing until we reach mid twenties so thats about 10 years off for most of them. Anything they do before then is like using a computer with an incompleter OS or program. It aint gonna work well or at well. And so, you will find teens saying hurtful things and being generally real stupid but at your 10 yr reunion, the same kids have matured and are cognizant of their past failures and apologizing or if they dont recall them, at least they are currently behaving as very nice human being, totally different than who they were in school. I have witnessed that at my reunion. Major , major difference. Those who were snobbish towards me or ignored me were all of a sudden fun friendly people to be around.
A homophobic school could be the issue. If thats the case, find support for now in on line gay teen sites. Some sites cover all types of differences, LBGT. And don't come out to your peers until they have had more time to grow up.
You may have to decide to not hang around with such a person as friends for now if it is a constant gay bashing you're forced to hear while keeping your stance secret. It's not worth the stress to you to keep a friend. You could ask why he believes that way.
You might be able to give him a different perspective as a friend.
It happened for my daughter in high school. She was deciding to become pagan, Wiccan after our family began to change from Christian past to both us parents going that way and leaving it up to our kids to decide what they wished to follow as they were teens now. One chose Christianity, and this one choose Wicca. All her friends she'd hung out with were Christian or of some such belief with A Morman friend in the group too. She could easily still blend in and come across as Christian, even though she was now following and understanding a new path. The Morman girlfriend said something terribly judging about pagans and how we shouldn't have anything to do with them. My daughter spoke calmly and by the end of her contributing thoughts, the girl realized she was hasty to have hate for certain types of people, that they are all Gods children, no matter what they believe and we should at least be loving towards them, truly so, not just to get them to turn to your own belief, etc, etc. I remember being so proud of her. You may be able to share some differing thoughts to give him something to think about and he may come around. You dont have to reveal you are gay. If he asks if you are a homo friend or if you are gay yourself, you don't have to answer, just say, that we are all gods children no matter what we believe which means as sisters and brothers we ought to treat each other better if not at least tolerate each other. Or whatever you are led to say. You don't have to say anything. And that way, protect yourself but still have part in helping a friend possibly become more open minded and accepting. Good luck!

Here's cactus A: https://flic.kr/p/p2VieL

Here's cactus B: https://flic.kr/p/p2FNBk

Thank you

I found it hard to find good photos of cactus on line.

Cactus B might be: Neobuxbaumia euphorbioides

But I could be wrong, you decide. Check out this link:
http://www.cactus-art.biz/schede/NEOBUXBAUMIA/photo_gallery_neobuxbaumia.htm

I couldn't open your first shot but perhaps the cactus photo gallery link will supply you with photos to help you identify the other.

good luck!

I have been sleeping with this guy for almost 2 years but hes never fingered me or ate me out. How Doi get him to? I give him hj and bj and just want him to return the favor. We werr about to have sex one time and I told him "wait I'm not wet enough" and he says "cant you make yourself"? Who says that. .I understand this is unhealthy and I deserve better and blah blah but u just want him to want me like I want him. He hardly even kisses me Anymore. 20 F

You're 20? Ah, so he's likely in the same age range. Hmm, well that explains a lot. Though there are some intelligent guys who are knowledgeable in sex and want to please their gal, most guys in that age range only know to put their dick in a hole. Its that basic for them because they are driven by lust and prefer getting off by having a girls hands, mouth or pussy to do the job. Those are the only 3 things that qualifies you to be his sex partner and guess what, every female has hands, a mouth and a pussy. He is not concerned with anything more like your mind, your feelings, your personality, your hopes dreams desires, wishes etc... because a young man is often very selfish and as to why selfish. Start looking around you at society in general. From the day he first watched TV as a child, he saw sex being used to sell things, he grew up being shown what media is trying to convince us all is the 'desirable' female. And that has changed over the years to what was in vogue at the time. Beauty at one time was considered to be very thin like a model named Twiggy (for a reason) a model like that today would be considered anorexic and yet it was the in style in the past. Pin up model Marilyn Monroe has photos of her looking big hipped and big boned with a rounded, not flat belly, a full size figure. She used to be the rage, everyone wante to look like Marilyn cus that was all the media fed us. Now a days, a girl who looked like her would be overlooked as a model of what beauty today is. Has any women over the centuries ever not been beautiful? No, just different from each other and diversity is what makes the world wonderful. Men have different tastes in what they like in a woman, some want the full figure, some thin, some prefer overweight women and a few have no preferance. So as far as attraction goes, there is someone for everyone, even for you. Next important thing is having a chemistry with each other, which seems you dont have either. there is no way to get your particular guy to be considerate and all of a sudden care about you and want to please you.
However there is a way to begin training all young men how to treat women and that is the second problem society has. the first was the media giving men a warped idea of what they want from a woman. the second problem is females making them self too available to these undesireable men, so there are no consequences to their actions and treatment of women. If tomorrow you told him, I just woke up and decided I am tired of being your on call sex toy. You are treating me as an object, not a person. I am leaving you and you'll never have a relationship with me again. He would go looking for another girl then, wouldn't he? But what if all young gals wised up and did the same thing, they might fall for him the first night but if he proved himself to be only a taker, not a giver, then there would be no 2nd time let alone 2 years or more with such a man. Just imagine, if your guy could not find one single female tomorrow night willing to sleep with him, how long do you think before the guy gets desperate, and when nothing he promises makes a difference, he will eventually break down and start asking females what they want and he might just be willing to make some heart felt changes in his life, and grow up and have respect for women and want to treat them as his Queen.
women banding together like this is highly unlikely so inadvertantly, you and others have been training their guys to be lazy, slothful, selfish, insensitive, etc. I know you don't realize it. bUT Now that I've pointed it out, you must realize you cant go on doing the same you have been. Thats not going to get you a loving careing respectful man. What you need is to have a list of what you will tolerate and what you wont in a relationship. May I suggest you first find someone you find attractive who treats you like a best friend first, and then later the sexual part of the relationship starts. You both need to have developed deep feelings for each other. Without the love, there's some great missing in the sex. Both should have the same likes and dislikes in sex, have the same libido, how often its desired.
If friendship is missing, the deep feelings missing and mutual desire to please and satisfy the partner missing, then it's not a relationship, it's a prison that one has willing let them-self inside, locked and thrown away the key. Painted that way, it doesnt make any sense for a person to willingly lock themselves up in a prison cell, does it? Well, what you are doing makes just as little sense and is pretty much the same thing. I can not help you. You need to be doing things to help yourself...cus really...only you can do it and begin to get a positive change in your life.
That change may mean having to let him go. Stop seeing him. You really aren't losing anything...you know that but your heart has ties to him and those feelings make it hard to leave or to demand better. But it can be done. Your conscious mind knows you need to leave. your subconscious mind where all our feelings and emotions dwell, is running the show right now and thinking it's giving you all you want but sometimes, our subconscious mind left to itself, is like leaving a 4 year old all alone in a house...its a recipe for disaster. If your sub mind can not see reason and be willing to go with the lead of your conscious mind, then they basically will remain at odds and you will remain in a hopeless relationship. Basically, you are worse off than a prostitute right now. A prostitute isnt loved by her trick, not doesn;'t worry about pleasing her, it's all about him and what he wants, he doesnt have to be a good lover or reciprocate and certainly doesnt kiss unless its part of what gets him horny. So she sounds like about where you are at, except she comes out ahead cus she had money in her pocket for it.

Hon, I am not trying to be mean and say you ARE a whore. thats not it at all, and i don't believe it for a minute. It's just with this one guy, you have actually put yourself in a situation where you are no better off than a woman of that profession. it's only a comparison i make in hopes that if nothing else I said has woke you up yet, hopefully this will.

I was married at 20 and with the guy 30 years. Not only were we mismatched sexually in libido, he didn't do anything for me, never had an orgasm until I left him and met other guys in my 40's!! That is a terrible thing. I don't want to see you lock yourself into a relationship for life and never have any satisfaction. Even worse, he admitted in the end not ever having been in love with me...I was nothing more than a thing to him, or at least a living breathing person to be maid, cook, go-fer and also a dumping ground for him to let go of his stress and disatisfaction, etc... I learned the hard way but it took a long time. I hope that you're learning the hard way has a much shorter time line. i finally came to my senses after decades, I hope it's much sooner for you. the choice is yours. If you want my recommendation of how to go about looking for the right guy, let me know, i'LL share it with you. Just to much to add on here right now. Good luck.

My sons father family is very mean and ignorant. Everytime I see them somewhere they pick and laugh. I have never did anything to these people. My sons grandmother does for her other grandkids but she doesn't do anything for my son. When she gets him something for xmas it's always too big. She has never got him anything for his bday. She knows this is her grandson me and her son was in a relationship for five years I never cheated but he did cheat on me. We broke up because he had a child with someone else. They treat that child great. It makes me mad because my son has crohns he need support from family. But he has always had my family. What should I do just continue to ignore these mean people.

If that is the way these people behave, consider your son lucky to not have them in his life. You will never be able to get an answer that will make sense in your mind as to why they all have made the choices they have. Humans often careen through life like a car out of control, leaving a path of destruction behind them and yet totally oblivious to it.
Sometimes in life, being blood related means nothing to some people and in life you can find true family with other's who become family to you and are adopted into your circle of who is family to you. Blood relations can drop the ball or worse, ignore and purposely shut out blood kin. there is nothing a person can do to change any one of them, so let it go. Focus your energies on finding people who treat you as if you are family and become part of their life and find more rewards and blessing from that than you could imagine. When my parents both died within years of each other, my kids were still small. We asked an older couple at church who had no grand kids yet if they would be honorary grandparents for the kids and they jumped at it. It was a natural choice to ask them as they treated us all so well and loved us to begin with. Asking someone to be family for you, perhaps an honorary grandparent for your son is the much more likely thing to happen than with actual family.
Don't go on the hunt for a grandma to adopt. Let it just happen when it happens, if it does. If it's important to you to find people whom your son can find support with, they are out there, Have faith and pray for God to bring them into your life. Good luck dear.

Had sex with this guy - no condom last night.
and now my vagina has this very soft throb. It's not quite super painful, but enough to feel uncomfortable.

Thoughts?
22/f

are you trying to get pregnant, wanting to have a child with him? If not, go purchase the morning after pill.
Having intercourse, (penis in vagina sex) is not known to cause lingering pain the next day. If he was too large for you to fit comfortably, maybe you'd have had pain at the time. If so, don't just grin and bear it. Sex is too be enjoyed, not be in pain in the butt, er...well, in the vagina.
Sorry, no more joking.
As for a throbbing feeling, the only 'throbbing' i can think of from experience relates to being turned on and the blood flowing to the females private regions just as it does for the male. Perhaps every time you think of him and your experience, you're getting turned on and the throbbing starts again? Not trying to be funny again, seriously...this explain the throbbing feeling. Now if there is no throbbing but you feel a lingering tenderness... yes that can happen at times especially if you both were very 'exuberant' in sex, and though it may have felt good at the time, it was a little rough on your tender inner parts. Mainly, the only time I have felt tender was when a guy was a wee bit too long for me and was 'doing the jack hammer thing'. The next morning I felt a bit tender. It happens throughout life depending on the partner, perhaps the position used, how hard and how long done. It isn't serious to feel something after wards, but in my experience it is very seldom. Dont worry about it. If you have a pain that lasts more than a day or two, perhaps there is something else wrong and it just happened to coincide with the same time as having sex and is not related. If the pain continues, go see a Dr.

Should I let my wife have a threesome with another man

The word, "let" implies that your wife has asked you about this already. And you were taken off guard. So you wanted to get opinions of others. Our opinions in this matter do not count. It's what happens to be okay with you. And even if you are willing to give her a chance, chances are you may have some strong feelings come up about this after getting into it, and realizing you feel jealous, neglected or whatever. You both have to agree ahead of time if you both are willing, to stop if either of you changes your mind along the way. If she did indeed bring up the subject, its actually normal. I used to attend a club with my ex and I asked the couples there, whose idea it was to attend the swing club for the purpose of threesomes or swapping and it in majority of cases, the females admitted they were the ones.

Now, there can be two reason for the female wanting a 3 some. She may feel she is bi-sexual and want to have opportunities with other females. There are many men who have adjusted to having a wife who is bi-sexual and he has no worry that she will be attracted to any men sexually.
The wife could be wanting to add some spice to the sex life by adding in a 2nd man to have 2 working on her. You'd have to be able to feel comfortable being nude in close proximity with another man even though you may have rules to not do anything with each other unless that was your plan to begin with. Another thing that can happen is 2 men on one female, is that after a while, the husband feels the wife is getting all the fun and he feels left out so they might decide to try swapping/swinging as a couple. This brings in another whole dimension. While you might have felt no jealousy with the other man, she may discover she feels jealousy if you are having fun with another woman. These kinds of situations can stress a marriage and if one partner does not want to quit these practices, then the marriage breaks up. I have a past with my ex in such things and no, he's not my ex because of what i just mentioned.

Now, on the other hand, if your wife has not brought up the idea of doing a threesome and this is something that you find exciting on a sexual level to think about, and this is all your idea...then all the same I just said applies but your would have to find her willing to do so too, not just to placate you, or please you but because she is willing and wanting to explore. It may take her time to agree. I never did the first time he asked. She may never agree. If that is the case, may I suggest you work out your fantasies on a site called Second Life. One can live the life of a Bank robber, or Texas ranger in the Western venue, enjoy a nude beach, go to a fairy land, sci fi land on a foreign planet, or even engage in sexual fantasies as either sex and the program is very detailed. A neighbor friend of mine plays and believe me, you can get caught up emotional and find certain fantasies fulfilled in the experience.
I hope this answers all you needed to know. If not, let me know how I can help further.

14 Male
Or. Lack there of as the case may be. I Have only noticed my lack of emotion very recently but looking back it must have been going on for months. Now there is emotion I'm not saying I'm completely devoid of this aspect of human existence but I only feel the strongest ones and they come down on me like a tonne of bricks.

The most clearest being Dread, and I don't feel it all the time it's not a constant sense of impending doom (a story for another time) but almost how an animal must feel when there is no way out but through. Like once I've done something wrong and have been caught out for example.

I know right from wrong but the emotions Tied to them (guilt etc.) seemed to have floated away.

An example I recently asked someone out and as they ummed and erred I didn't feel worried etc. I just stood and waited went through a text with out so much as a shrug, when he (oh yes there's more) started ignoring me? Nothing.

There are nuances I won't go through now you've read enough. Thanks for reading this much if you have any advice (save seek therapy etc.)
I would be thankfull.

Yours Faithfully
Someone needing "help."

You mentioned nothing of trying to self diagnose your situation or condition. Likely because even if you had tried, you would see that there are many similarities between mental disorders. I have read about a lot of them having an ex who had one and a friend who had one and it was a process of their doctors narrowing down over time what they might be plagued with, if labels matter that much to you. What they are most concerned with is what treatments you respond best with, no matter what disorders they are used for.
If this is bothering you enough that you cant ignore it or let it rest, then I Suggest you see a mental health official as we here at advicenators are not.

Hi.I am in a relationship with my guy for almost 9 months.We have our ups and downs but now adays , we've been having our downs only.It's like , we had sex 4 months ago and now , we just don't have a place where we can have it.I am absolutely okay with it , but he's all horny and devastated.We've been having so much fights lately.It's just so bad!I just love him so much and he does too.We end up leaving each other after every fight but we get back together and have a fight all over again.I cannot live without him.I try to fix the fights and they do get fixed but we have a fight all over again.I don't trust him anymore.He describes how horny he is every single day but I can't do anything about it.We don't even have privacy when we meet , it's just public places.So we can't really do anything.And his ex lives near his place , she always pops up out of no where and that girl is extremely horny aswell , he doesn't talk to her much and all but lately he has been talking about her a lot.I try to keep my cool but she sent him a text asking him to go at her place to go get some songs and shit with using all the winking emoticons.So I was like "So go to her place ;)" and he just went like "yeah" an then I was like "Have some good sex with her maybe" and he went like "If I tell her she will do so" and it pissed me off so much!I expected a different reaction but I was like wow!and then I went like "If you're trying to make me jealous think what would you have done if I told you something like that regarding one of my ex" and he was like "I was just telling you what she said" and so I didn't answer his text anymore and he just sent me another text saying "Just dont talk to me if you can't behave properly!" I mean like what the hell?!And so later we fixed the fight and I told him what I expected from him and he just went like "I am devastated and horny but I keep calm and I didn't expect you to ask me things like that , I was shocked" and so I told him that "That doesn't even make sense , I don't even trust you anymore!" and we ended up having a fight again.
I don't know what to do.I love him.Mom knows about us , my cousins know.I don't want us to end.But I don't see any options either.

One of the drawbacks to being young is not having a place to have sex freely without being interrupted. I have no answer for as to where.

It seems from your letter that most his fighting might just be over frustrations of not being able to have sex with you. I agree, thats no reason to take it out on you. On the other hand, it may be that his attraction to you only goes skin deep as it often does for guys. I can't say it is so but there is a chance he is more in lust with you rather than in love with you. That plus the young-ness of age (immaturity) and inexperience in the do's and don'ts of relationships would easily explain why there are so many fights.

I cant tell you what to do that would make everything magically good. But I can explain what the purpose of dating is and perhaps that will give you a different way to look at dating.

At your point in age, the object is not to practice longevity of relationship, sticking together long term even if its not a perfect dating relationship. The object is not to prove to yourself or others that you can stick with someone long term...that comes in later years after you have a clue what kind of person you want to end up life long with.

Dating is for determining if there is interest beyond basic attraction, discovering more about the other to determine if you like and can handle their personality traits, and whether there's enough in common, or evidence of destructive habits or tendencies in the other that would harm you emotionally and/or physically and kill the relationship. Depending on what you discover, you either continue dating the person and take it to the committed couple level or you break up.

Dating is more about learning what you do and don't like in a guys character and the same for him. Its a time of making comparisons. Seeing what is lacking in a current partner that you would like to have, or something that they do, or ways they treat you that are disrespectful or hurtful emotionally or physically as in being abusive or violent. When you come up against things like that, you need to decide if you will settle for less or move on to the next dating partner, hopefully always shooting for someone a step better in some area. Make a list of the qualities you like and remind yourself with another list of the qualities you dont like or must avoid because they are harmful to your well being. Review it and update it often through out the years.

If you break up, you look for the next dating partner, always trying to find someone a step better than the last partner, basing your choices for the new person on traits you discovered in the last person that you liked enough to look for in the next person, while at the same time avoiding the other things that you won't tolerate.
If all is going well and you develop some serious feelings for each other, you take the relationship from just dating to the committed couple level. At this level, depending on your age, you are dating each other exclusively or if adults, moving in together or getting married.
If you find you keep having the same issues, no matter which guy you date, either you never learned from the past relationship, or perhaps more of the issues are with you and you need to be honest with yourself as to what issues you need to work on within yourself before you can make a good dating partner. I can't begin to stress how helpful having a list of what I liked and wanted and needed in a guy was to me in finding my 2nd husband. It should work just as well at any age, including high school dating too.

I'm skinny and I don't have anorexia, pr any other eating disorder preventing me for eating, it's just my genetics. I take after my mom's side of the family, wich are small people. So I'm small. I eat a good amount, i eat hamburgers and pizza. I'm a fine weight, I'm 11, I don't really weigh myself but when I went to the eye nose and throat doctor he had to weigh me and I was 62 pounds. It doesn't mean I'm fake. It's gonna be really hard for me at my age to have a fake body. And everyone says that big girls are real, and skinny girls are twigs and pipsqueaks. It's not fair that fat girls who are unhealthy get praised for it and skinny girls who are healthy are shamed for it. Not everybody who isn't overweight is anorexic. And some may be, but you shouldn't make fun of people with eating disorders because it's their own problems they need to fix and they can't help it and they are really sensitive about it so stfu. And it really depends on what your veiws are on a perfect body, in my opinion. Some like big asses, some like abs, others prefer skinny girls.

I've been thin and petite all my life. It's naturally how my body is supposed to be. And never in my life did anyone call me fake or anorexic.
My guess is that it's just the age group, young kids, and teens who try to have an opinion of their own but its hardly ever based in fact nor is it tactful so as to not hurt anyones feelings.

My guess is that as they grow up, they will learn to watch what they say better and be kinder and more constructive, but that dear comes with maturity and tho some have minds that may mature a little in their teens, for most of us, the brain isnt fully done maturing until our mid twenties.
So you are going to have to just ignore them for now.

What happens if a girl swallow sperm of a girl during blowjob?

You may have meant one of the words to be boy in which case, as you've been told, nothing happens...it is just protein.

If you did mean both words to be girl and in oral sex one girl is swallowing the liquid of another female, then you need to know that females do not have sperm in their liquid. If she gushes out a liquid in orgasm, it is the equivalent of a male ejaculation, only without sperm. A female only has one egg per month released to await fertilization by a man's sperm that entered her vagina. If its not fertilized, you won't get that egg in her cum, that egg exits with her period flow monthly.

I'm a 13 year old girl and there's something wrong with my jaw. It's been going on for about a year now. At the beginning, it was just when I chew food or him or whatever it would kinda get stuck if that makes sense. It gets really hard to keep chewing. But last month it started not opening all the way. When I yawn it'll sometimes only let me open halfway so I have to close my mouth and test every few minutes to see if I can open it because I'm afraid that I'll get hurt if I force it. Is there some easy way to fix this or should I ask my parents to take me to a doctor?

What you have is most likely a Temporo-mandibular disorder.
This can be verified and treated by a specialist so you need to tell your parents.If there is any significant change left to your skeletal structure due to the fact you are still growing at your age, perhaps any growth changes may affect it positively, making it go away on its own or make it worse. A doctor should be able to determine what may be contributing to the discorder. Usually one goes to see their dentist who will prescribe a specialist in the Dental arena.
There are many websites discussing TMD or TMJ and here is one of them:

Good luck dear...hope you get relief from that soon.
http://www.deltadentalins.com/oral_health/tmj.html

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