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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.

The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.

advice

Hi , so today I took a pregnancy test but I am so confused. So the pregnancy in order for it to be positive it should mark (+)(|) but if it's negative it should mark (-)(|). But my question is the pregnancy test marked (-) but it didn't mark the second line. In order to be positive the first line is a plus and then a straight line. And in order to be negative the first line should be horizontal (-) and then a vertical one (|). It marked negaitive as the first line horizontal (-) but it didn't mark the second line. Should I be worried? I mean the second line is the same for both positive and negative the only difference is the first lines a plus for positive and a horizontal line for negative. And I got the first negative horizontal line but no second line. Help?!

The chances are the reading is correct and the product is defective in not showing the other line. For peace of mind I would purchase another test kit from another brand and test again.

If the second test from a different brand is negative then you are probably not pregnant. Should the second kit test positive wait ten days and retest. If you get a positive reading then see a doctor for a lab test which is the real test.

I am setting up an appointment with a gyno ASAP - but I'm really confused and upset and am hoping someone can shed some light on this.

For the past 3 weeks I have been dealing with what I *thought* was a severe yeast infection. I tend to get them a lot, and they typically go away on their own, but this one was especially bad so I took Diflucan. What was unusual was that I had some pain when urinating, but I heard that this can occur with a yeast infection, so I didn't think anything of it.

It appeared to improve thanks to the Diflucan, and then I had my period, which ended today. Today, in the shower, I noticed that it was especially painful to wash "down there" and upon closer examination I noticed a bunch of teeny, tiny, almost invisible little red bumps all the way down my inner labia. They hurt to the touch and I assume urine getting on them was why it hurt to pee.

I have had unprotected sex with two different people - both long term, long distance boyfriends. The first boyfriend was tested (or so he claims) for all STDs and came back negative. We only had unprotected sex on one occasion, a week after which I also experienced some pain and what felt like sores to me. My gyno told me it was BV and a yeast infection and said she didn't see any sores. Sure enough, after using the BV treatment all of my symptoms went away.

The second boyfriend and I had unprotected sex with some frequency (I am on birth control), and I am also the first person he has ever had unprotected sex with. I haven't had sex with anyone since, except for oral two months ago, and that person didn't present with any sores on the mouth or anything like that.

Could this be herpes?

I think you may be jumping off the deep end on this one. Since you are going to see your GYN, which is a good idea, we should let the doctor have the final say.

If your current boyfriend had herpes and you gave him oral sex it is very possible you would have sore around your mouth.

Now none of us are doctors so to make a diagnosis is not something we do. Common sense says to me with the fact that you had a yeast infection and if you shave down there. It is very possible that razor burn is more likely which may have become inflamed from the yeast infection or even infected.

Should I be correct in my assumption the doctor will probably prescribe a topical antibiotic and possibly an oral one as well. If so I would refrain from unprotected sex during the inflammation.

In fact until you are in a long term relationship, either living with someone or married. I suggest even though you are on birth control that you practice safe sex and use condoms. Besides the protections condoms offer from most STDS and the HIV/AIDS virus a condom increases the protection against unwanted pregnancy for someone on birth control to almost 100%

I've been a straight A student all my life but have gotten Bs on my social studies report card 3 times. People all talk about my grades and rub it in my face that i got a single B. People have said that I'm a dumb wast of air. Although I'm smart and get good grades most of the time, I'm made fun of for 89s in social studies. I pay attention in class and study but I cant get an A. Help?

I don't know why anyone would tease you over getting a "B" in any subject. A "B" is a very acceptable grade. Not wanting to accept that as your final grade for the year is admirable and you should request a meeting with your teacher to see if there is some extra work or special assignment you can do that would bring your grade for the year up to an "A."

I think whoever is teasing you is doing so because receiving this "B" may be upsetting you and some of them may even be jealous of your ability to get high marks in school. Do those who are teasing you get the high grades that you do? Do they have all "A's" on their report cars? Somehow I doubt it.

Don't let their teasing bother you. I know it is hard to do but it is the right thing to do for the more you let it bother you and the more they see it upset you; the more they will tease you.

The next time someone says something to you, say something like this back to them. "You know I have been looking at the "B" and it really lends some balance to the artistic balance of my report card. My parents are not upset so I think I'll just keep it this way."

Sure what I just wrote is not true, but they don't know that and what they will hear is there teasing is not getting the reaction they want. If they don't get the reaction they want they will stop.

You are a smart kid so keep up the good work. Don't let the other kids get you down over 1 "B". If you really want to bring the "B" up to an "A" on your final report card talk to your teacher about some extra credit assignments.

Have a great summer; you've earned it.

I have a question about Christianity my religion or how people react.
I'm Christian and I always will be, a lot of people say gay is a sin. I believe otherwise. I try to explain that is isn't or even if it was God can forgive you. But it just hasn't helped they don't accept gays, some call me gay which I'm not because
I acaccept them. Which I put it aside if they hate them and move on. Some people say I'm not christian because I support homosexuals. Or becuase our beliefs differ.

Ok ivde heard that the bible says homosexuals are sins.
What verse is this supposedly in. I know it doesn't say its wrong just wanna see where people think it says it. So maybe I can retranslate it to what it was supposed to be interpreted

Good for you for being accepting of how others can be different. Just for the record people don't chose to be gay it is how they are born. Scientist now believe that being gay is in the DNA and is instilled at birth.

One of the reasons people believe being gay is a choice is because for the longest time gays had to make a choice. They had to either live as a gay and face the worlds condemnation or chose to live a lie and attempt to live as a heterosexual. The same is true for transgendered. people who feel they where born into the wrong body. It is only very recently that society has come to realize the truth and be more accepting of Gays, Lesbians and Transgendered.

While I am not a student of the Bible I believe the passage you are looking for, which I have never seen or read goes something like this, "Man will not lie with Man."

"when it comes to the Bible with all of its different versions and interpretations is it truly the word of God or mans beliefs of how god may want people to live and believe. Some believe it is a book of fables.

I believe the Bible is your choice to believe or not to believe and to interpret with your own mind as god gave you. I believe with all the rewriting and different editions that the original works of the bible may have changed from what the were originally to what they are today.

This does not mean you should not believe in your religion, we all need something to believe in. Your open minded will help you better understand and accept you religion which is very good.

12/f
My parents fight. A lot. They fight about money mostly , not because they don't have good jobs, but because they both handle the money badly(we r in the upper middle class). They also fight about little stuff too tho. Sometimes they crack and scream and break things. I get stressed out about it all and have mini breakdowns because I am so scared, like I can fear pulsing through me. They will makeup and then during a trip they'll fight again and then the whole trip is ruined.
Sometimes my mom will want me to get involved and be on "her side". I feel like a traitor if I choose sides. My mom won't get a divorce BC 1. She wants to be repaid by my dad through the lifestyle and money because she made his career and 2. She knows on her own with me and my two siblings we would never be able to afford the life we have now. I don't tell my two best friends because I don't want them to think of my parents that way. In a way, pretending everything is all right is what keeps me sane. Soccer and piano help too, but I still have panic attacks even when I am doing that. What do I do?

Let’s start with the fighting. The fact they mom and dad fight does not mean they don't still love each other. Things said in the heat of an argument are rarely ever meant. The fact that they in a manner of speaking kiss and make up means they still love each other.

My God parents when they were alive constantly screamed at each other. It is just how the communicated but they loved each other to death a fact I was well aware of.

I don't know your parents so I can't really say what is behind all there arguing. Money does cause arguments. The fact that you have it does not mean you have to spend it. This in of itself can be the root cause of many arguments or it could be the other way around that one of your parents is pending money like a drunken sailor just because you do have it. This is another reason for arguments between parents.

Wanting to get a divorce because you want to be repaid for making someone’s career. This can be legitimate reason or just an excuse made to you to justify not getting a divorce. Under the law in most states a wife does have the right to 50% of her husband’s business or earnings if she is responsible for his ability to earn. Reasons would be her working and pay his way through college and schools such or Med or law school.

Now as for you. You should not upset yourself over your parents’ arguments. I know easy to say hard to do. Fact is there is little or nothing you can do. When mom or dad asks you to take their side in any argument you should simply say; "I love you both equally and I will not take sides." "Please work this out yourselves it hurts me physically to see you argue."

If they are good parents which I believe they are for you have not said differently this should bring them up short on their argument to ask you what you mean. This is when you tell them about their argument causing you panic attacks.

This is when you can suggest family counseling to help resolve whatever is causing the arguments. This is when you as to see your doctor and ask the doctor for help in suggesting family counseling.

In the alternative you can talk with a trusted teacher or your school principal about your home life and how you are having panic attacks. When a student comes to a teacher or principal as you would they are required to notify family services.

Family services would contact your parents and try to mediate the problems at home for you and to see to it you get the proper medical treatment to relieve the panic attacks. I fairly positive they would also mandate family counseling as well.
Your choice as to how you want to do this but one of these two choices is the best way to help yourself and your parents.

I've cut my daily calorie intake from 4000 to 1500, I'm drinking lots of water and green tea every day (they're the only beverages I drink now), I've cut out crisps, chocolate, cakes, and all forms of junk food. I exercise for 30 minutes a day. I've been doing this for 10 days so why haven't I lost any weight?

A diet of 1,500 calories is well below the minimum daily recommended calorie count for the average active teenager.

I do not wish to scare you but I would like you to see your doctor and have the doctor check your Adrenal system. I have a friend whose Daughter is seriously ill in hospital. She tried to lose weight like you with diet and exercise. Instead of losing weight she ballooned up to 200 pounds, got very sick and is now in the hospital fighting for her life.

Nothing says this is your problem and I might very well just be an alarmist. Fact is I would rather be an alarmist and scare you into going to the doctor than sit here and say nothing. Then read months from now that you're sick and fighting for your life.

Please see a doctor and have your Adrenal system checked.

I have been diagnosed with Major depression with psychotic features (I see, hear and feel things that others can't). My friends say that it is all in my head and that I'm just making an excuse as to why I choose to be depressed and I can prevent it. Is this true? Am I making of all of this up? If I am, what are some things I can try in order to not choose to be depressed? If I'm not making this up and my friends just don't like it, then what can I do to help myself not be so depressed so I can get through the day?

Here's the situation:
I am no longer interested in hobbies that I used to like (example: video games, drawing, reading, writing, phototraphy). I also am crying off and on throughout the day. I can barely eat or sleep. If I do get to sleep, I have trouble staying asleep. I see shadow people and they constantly talk and touch me keeping me up all night to where I can't sleep. I basically get out of bed to go to work and when I get home, I just sit and do nothing.

My husband is understanding of my situation and is also trying to help me find a coping skill to master so my depression cannot control me any more.

My real Question is: What are some good coping skills do deal with my mental disorder?

You did not supply this information so how was I to know this. There is help for you if you know where to look. Being diagnosed with psychotic features could, emphasis on could as you again have not said what the voices are telling you. Could place you as being a danger to yourself or others. If this is the case go to any hospital ER and they will help you and the hospital patient advocate will help you get the benefits available to you so that you can receive treatment.

If the voices are not telling you to hurt yourself contact your county or state mental health agency. Every state and most counties have one. They are there to help you. You might also want to contact a legal aid attorney for help with this agency.

If you have ever worked at all file for Social security disability benefits (SSI) with Medicare assistance. You can file on line, have you husband help you as it is quite a lot of questions that need to be answered. You may even be eligible to file under his social security benefits. Call SSI 1-800-772-1213 for information and help do not assume anything.

You replied you have no job, no money for medication. Yet in you writing you wrote; I basically get out of bed to go to work and when I get home, I just sit and do nothing." I see this as the depression talking. If your working and the company has and EAP program, ask don't assume they don't. Call the EAP hot line they can help you.

As far as skills to cope with depression; unless you know what is causing the depression it is hard to tell you what to do to cope. Thinking happy thoughts, trying to keep yourself active so as to try and ignore the pain of depression does not work. Treatment is the only coping skill I know that works. Please make the calls I suggest, there is help you just have to find it.

No one chooses to be Depressed. There are a number of different factors that go into why we become depressed. One major reason is hormonal which is why women sometimes suffer from depression after giving birth.

Once you fall into the pit of depression you fall into the cycle of depression which is not something you can exit without good professional help. Being diagnosed with Major depression with psychotic features; I would expect you would be being treated by a psychiatrist for medication and a psychologist. The psychologist would help you cope with this illness to start with and them to get at the root cause of your depression through talk therapy.

Having suffered with depression brought on by a major depressive episode I know how scary this can be for you. The depression causes pain both mental and physical, which causes more depression. This is called the cycle of pain which medication and talk therapy help to break.

I did not suffer with psychotic features so I cannot speak to it. I do know that while depressed what I saw and heard was perceived wrong messed up by my depression. Which of course caused me to be more depressed. This was the first battle that had to be fought. Once this battle was won we worked to get at the root cause. It was hard work and as much as I fought to hide from the truth when it finally revealed itself everything fell into place and we were able to talk about the problem and instead of hiding from it we dealt with it and put it in its proper perspective.

If you are not being treated by a psychiatrist and psychologist then you need to do so NOW. Especially with the psychotic features.. The psychiatrist should be Board Certified as a Board Certified Psychiatrist is the best qualified to deal with these types of problems.

It won't be easy, it wasn't for me. With hard work between you and the doctors and being compliant with your medications I can assure you there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Major depression does not have to be a lifelong event.

When I go to the doctor I want to know what they ask because if they are going to tell my mom I play with myself I am not going for any reason until I live on my own. Please help!

If you are 14 years of age or older you do not have to worry about any questions a doctor might ask you concerning your reproductive system. I will explain why below shortly.

To answer your question doctors will only ask question relevant to what problems you present to them and then based on their examination of you and what they may see upon examination. So it is unlikely that a Doctor is going to ask you if you masturbate. It is more likely based on whatever problem you present with that the doctor will ask if you are sexually active. All a doctor can tell by examination is that your Hyman may be ruptured. In today’s world through activities and use of Tampons a woman's Hyman can be ruptured without ever experiencing sex.

What is important is to answer the doctors’ questions truthfully so that the doctor may properly care for you. To make this possible Congress passed a law giving anyone 14 years of age or older Medical Confidentiality. What this means for you specifically is you do not have to wait until you live on your own to see a doctor?

Because this law gives medical confidentiality parents cannot know anything about doctor’s visits related to any visit for problems related to the reproductive system. This includes the urinary track as well since it requires the examination of either the male or female sex organ which is part of the reproductive system.

The law is called HIPPA; under this law parents may not be in the exam room with their child, may not be told what the doctor is examining their child for or what the doctor treats them for. The only way they can be told is if their child gives the doctor written consent to tell them. Parents cannot force a child to undergo any examination or treatment; this includes abortions or stop any exam or treatment. All the person over 14 needs to tell the doctor is they are invoking their rights under HIPPA. The doctor and or the staff will protect your rights from there.

Also under this law anyone 14 years of age does not need parental permission to see a doctor. The may make an appointment to see a doctor, be treated by the doctor all without parental permission or knowledge. They can see any doctor of their choosing or go to any of the women's or free medical clinics. Birth control is also available and does not need parental permission.

Congress did not pass this aw to promote teenage sex. They passed this law so teenagers would go to doctors or clinics for answers to questions they might be too embarrassed to ask their parents. To go to see a doctor if something was bothering them related to their reproductive system.

In short there is no reason not to take proper care of your reproductive system while you live at home. Cancer and other illnesses know no age limits. Proper preventative care of your reproductive system now will insure that you will have the ability to have Children in the future.

Just remember when you see the doctor to say "I want MY HIPPA RIGHTS." If mom was intending to go in to the exam room with you she will be told to wait in the waiting room and whatever you and the doctor discuss stays in the exam room. It cannot go back to mom or the doctor is looking at 5 years in Jail.

My fiancée and I were fooling around a month ago and after I gave him a HJ and he came, he went to the bathroom to clean up and I for whatever reason put my finger into my vagina. I did not feel any wetness on my finger from the semen. Two weeks later I got my period, however it was slightly irregular due to recently stopping the pill. Is there any chance that I may be pregnant? I've also taken two pregnancy tests in the past week, both negative. I'm just experiencing a lot of anxiety due to this.

Your not pregnant. Two facts point to this;

1) You got your period two weeks after the event. If you were pregnant you would not have gotten a period.

2) Two negatives home pregnancy test are good evidence you are not pregnant.

You don't say how long you were off the pill before this event but stopping the pill does not mean you will immediately get pregnant. Your body must rid itself of the built up medication before you can conceive. Normally this takes anywhere from 1 to two months.

You don't say why you went of the pill. If you and your fiancé are not planning on having children right away I would suggest, unless there is a medical reason, for not being on the pill that you get back on it. The pill is the most effective contraceptive there is today. The pill and condoms used together have an effective rate of contraception of almost 100%.

My girlfriend wants me to finger her, but I don't know how to transition from kissing to start touching her.

Alexisgirlie is correct in the advice she gave you. Sex like anything else in life is a learned experience. The best way is to ask her what she likes, where and how she likes to be touched. If she is asking you to finger her then it is a good bet she masturbates.

Don't be alarmed that she might as 85% of us do. If she does masturbate then she knows exactly how she like to be fingered. There are two types of women in this world when it comes to sex. They are either vaginal or clitoral. Vaginal women get more enjoyment from having fingers put in the vaginal when being fingered. Clitoral women get more enjoyment from having their clitoris gently rubbed.

The same goes for you if you're a guy and you masturbate. You know what feels good and how you like your penis and testacals played with. How are either of you two to know what the other likes if you don't ask.

Se which includes fingering, hand jobs and eventually oral sex are all learned experiences that must be learned anew with each new partner in order to give them ultimate pleasure. Communication in sex is just as important as communication is in any other situation. So talk to her as you start to finger her. Ask if she likes what you're doing. Ask her to take your hand and place it where it feels pest. Do the same when you ask her to give you a hand job.

Lately I've been feeling really gloomy. I've asked lots of people online for advice, and they suggest I might be depressed. I'm kinda swapping back and forth with the idea, and I've taken test online and they say Im depressed. The thing is, even when I feel well, I just about always prefer depressing stories, movies, songs, anything depressing. I' even seem to enjoy it after I experience pain. My mom was even speaking to me a few months ago how that wasn't normal. I know I've had depression in the past for personal reasons, and I know it was severe then, and I know what I'm feeling now isn't nothing like what is was then. I haven't experienced any kind of tragic event, and this has been going on all week. Is there some way I could find out for sure if I have depression without some multiple test or going off to see a professional? I try too keep this kind of thing from my parents too. Anything I can do besides that?

The only true way to know is to have your doctor screen you for depression. It is a painless exam usually done along with a complete physical to rule out any organic reason for feeling as you do. The screening itself is usually a dozen or so questions your doctor will ask you.

Depression is a very strange illness. If you are like me and suffered with it undiagnosed for any length of time it becomes your normal. Being depressed was my normal for I was depressed or lived in a depressed state for many years. Then something happened to throw me into a deep depression and I asked for help.

This is called hitting bottom and is the closest you might ever want to come to having a nervous breakdown you ever want to come to. I do not recommend waiting for something like what happened to me happen to you before getting screened and getting help, for it was very frightening.

My advice is to see your doctor, get screened then follow your doctor's advice.

im 18 and his 30. hes married and soon going to be a father too. hes my college teacher. 2 months ago we started talking. and we talk like best best friends. recently he started saying i loveyou. even i say it.but for me its in a best friend manner. i like him. every girl in college does. we flirt too but its just for fun. he has dropped me home twice. yesterday we went for a long drive and while coming he held my hand for about 3-4 mins as he was driving. he dropped me home. and later he texted me saying that "i wanted to hug u". and his next message was im not sure whether its right or not. then later while coming back home we were quiet fr sumtym. so he texted me sayn that "i think we were quiet because we both wanted to come close to each other. i may be wrong also" i replied saying i dnt think that this is the reason for the silence.he then was like im eally sorry for that msg. im feeling bad. im feeling akward and so on. i dont know wether i shud trust him or not.i dont know whats goin on in his head. please help

This is not a good situation to be in. For one thing he is in a position of authority over you. For another he is married and I doubt you want to be his mistress. Last he is 12 years older than you and very much more experienced in matters of the heart and sex.

My advice is to keep your relationship with him entirely professional; student/teacher and no further than that. You should tell him you are uncomfortable with where your relationship is going and that you feel it is best that from here forward you return to a student/teacher relationship.

Should he in any manner try to convince you to do otherwise or impart that academically you could suffer by ending your relationship with him. Then you go right to the Dean of students and report his behavior to the Dean.

Why are there some people who rarely seem to experience failure? Like they have some magic answer to achieving success all the time? I work so unbelievably hard at the things I do and with the utmost level of passion and enthusiasm, keep an open mind and am always going for things and putting myself out there. I'd say I fail 90% of the time and succeed 10%. Of course, I'm grateful for when I do succeed, but I just don't think I'm reaching my full potential; as if I don't hold this magic key certain other people seem to have.

My brother is one of these people who never fails. In high school he was top notch at just about everything: ranked in top 10, amazing musician, star athlete, organized, level-headed, "kind", you name it. He didn't get rejected from any schools and got full scholarships. Now a few years into college, he continues on that path and is starting to get opportunities for really impressive career endeavors. No internships or programs ever turn him down. My parents seem to think that hard work is the answer to everything, but quite frankly I put my entire soul into what I do and don't achieve the way he does. Why are there some people who just KNOW what to do to achieve success? They make me feel like I am blind.

I understand that comparing myself to other people is not the answer, but watching my brother and some of my friends/classmates/colleagues right now achieve the kind of success I so envy is blinding my ability to see things clearly. It's also making my view of a bright future somewhat dim. I am terrified I will have to live at home forever or be miserable in a career that makes me a living but that I don't enjoy (I am in the process of attempting an extremely difficult, competitive career path in the arts).

I know these are questions without clear answers, but please. help me out with some level-headed ideas as to what I am doing wrong or why I feel this way or anything really.

There is an old saying that might be applicable to what you are saying her. There are people whose plans fail and those who plan to fail. Then there are those people who just have no plan at all.

There is nothing wrong with having a plan that fails as long as you learn something from that failure. Failing at something is learning. If you plan to fail then you do not learn or if you have no plan at all then you are doomed to failure.

I don't know where you fit into the above. Hard work alone is not the key to success alone. It takes a clear plan on how you are going to get their as well. That plan is your road map. Yes there may be roadblocks and even detours along your route of travel and it is to be expected and you adjust your plan as required when you come upon these things. You must have a road map, a plan, before you start out on the road to your goal.

What goes hand in hand with you roadmap is conquering time management. TO many of us let time manage us. When we allow time to manage us is when we begin to see a higher rate of failure for we tend to miss deadline or fail to complete projects.

You say you're a hard worker and you probably are. Is it possible you work too hard? Meaning you have taken on to heavy a course load. If so this is another pothole in your road map to your goal for once again no matter how well you try to manage time there are only so many hours in a day and you have more work then you have time to properly complete.

I don't think you're a failure and I don't think you plan to fail. What I believe is either you have no true plan, one that you have sat down and mapped out on paper, or that plan is flawed in some manner.

What you need to do is stop. Take a weekend off and relax get your head together. Spring break should be approaching and this would be a good time to stop and reevaluate where you are, what your plan is if you have one written and make the needed adjustments.

You are probably saying this guy is nuts and is nuts offering me any answers or solutions but I really am. I've given you a road map to find the answer to your problem. since I do not know you and can only gage your problem from the little you have written this is the best answer I can give you to help. Being overworked does lead to failure and I think this may be the core of your problem. If you sit down and map things out as I have suggested it should become crystal clear to you.

You can always write back to me in a private message should you need more help.

Hy bro my name is honey I live in Pakistan lahore
I have a good relationship with my girlfriend
From 4 year but I can't do sex with her because she
Don't want to sex from for year ago ? She always
Said me that she's not type of that all girls
Who do sex ? But I want to do sex with her
So plz tell me who I forced her to do sex
With me ? Give me some tips ? Take care a lot
I am waiting for ur ans ?

When a women says no to sex it means NO. If you try to force her to have sex it is sexual harassment. I am not familiar with the laws in India but I believe they do have sexual harassment type laws.

If you do force her to have sex with you that is RAPE! Based on what I am reading about rape in your country the government is taking a very strong approach to punishing anyone who commits the crime rape.

My advice if you need sexual gratification either masturbate, find a prostitute or find a girlfriend who will have sex with you. Do not force this girl to have sex with you.

Lately I've been trying to find out who I am. I feel like I can never settle on one thing. I'm a sixteen year old female, and I'm having trouble finding out who the 'real' me is. There are days I feel emo, and only want black, and there are days I feel totally with the world and want to wear white with flowers in my hair, and there are days I go wild and try to look sexy, and there are days I feel like a tomboy and can't even stand to look at pink, and there are days I feel girly and want to do my hair up and put on something cute and girly. I'm having trouble finding out who I am. I tried taking a personality test online, but basically the answer is yes and no to all of them. Since that's clearly out of the question, how do I find out what it is that I really like, and who the real me is? I'm sure many would call these 'teenage phases' but I don't know what it is I like and can't decide on anything. Any ideas?

What you are going through is not what could be called a phase as most all of us have gone through this. It is part of being a teenager. Part of it is hormonal confusion which will abate as you adjust to the new hormones as they release during puberty. Part of this is environmental as you try to identify with different things.

These sexual identity you are troubling with is a bit normal and related both to hormones and your environment to some extent. At your age we all want to identify with something. Many of us have some trouble doing so. There are many reasons for this and good ones for it. You are probably more self aware than others, aware of the world at large. You are also a good student who intellect is fogging your true identity. There is nothing wrong here as this is part of the environmental things I spoke of. You are also most likely somewhat shy and introverted. If so you may have just a bit of low self-esteem.

You could ask your guidance counselor at school for a personality test though I don't think you need to take one or it will give you the answers you're looking for. If you are as I believe somewhat shy and introverted then this is where you should focus to find your identity. You need to breakout of your shell and experience the world at large with as many different types of friends that you can. In this way you will find where you fit in best.

So long story short a while ago I bought a replica gold Pandora bracelet from somebody online after my real one was stolen, to replace the feeling of having one without spending another $1200. It's high quality and looks almost the same as the real one. It even says Pandora on it.

So basically I have a replica gold Pandora bracelet and I also have an authentic silver Pandora bracelet that I was gifted by my fiance.

She's wanting to give me ANOTHER gold (replica) Pandora bracelet in trade for my Fendi wallet.

In the past I worked for Pandora and I got a discount to buy my fiance's mother a silver Pandora bracelet (and also my old real gold Pandora bracelet that was stolen) but my mother doesn't have one. I've asked my mom before if she wanted one and she said no but I felt like she was just saying that because they're expensive and she didn't want to seem jealous or petty.

The silver authentic Pandora bracelet is $65 which isn't too bad if you have extra money and why I could afford the one for my fiance's mother. The gold authentic Pandora bracelets start at $1200 so you can see the obvious price difference.

The fake one is $50 and like I said it looks almost exactly the same as the real one except for one minor difference that I only notice because I worked for Pandora.

I really want her to have one because I want her to feel like she has something nice and glamorous and I want to be able to buy her charms in the future for it. What I don't want to happen is for her to bring it to a store and have somebody with a very good eye notice that it looks a tiny bit different on the inside of the clasp and ask her if it's fake but I really don't think anybody will because it's VERY SMALL difference.

I also don't want her to look online for charms though and wind up finding out the real ones are $1200 and heckle me about where I got the money to buy her one...though I figure I could just tell her I got a really good deal at a estate sale or something.

Should I give it to her or should I just keep it for myself?

This is something you have to decide yourself. I will say this; If you do decide to go with the imitation and make up some story to tell her you had better write it down for some time in the future she is going to ask you again. When this happens she will remember what you said but you will have forgotten the mistruth you told her and be caught in your deception.

I did go on line to the Pandora WEB side and the Gold bracelet now starts just over $1,400. I also saw the $65 bracelet as well as 2 $300 bracelets. My question to you is does she have to have an exact match for yours or can you afford one of the $300 bracelets?

Being a guy I could be totally of base her but I would think the fun would be in the two of you having different bracelets to get different charms for and $300 is far less the $1,400 something you and your fiancé can save for and make a present to her at your wedding.

Be it the $65 or $300 bracelet I think your mother will understand that you bought what you could afford each time. Knowing you worked for Pandora when you bought your future mother in-laws does make a difference, she will still treasure your gift. I do not have to be a mom to know that. I treasure any gift my children get me because they are given with love. Key words her are; "Given With Love."

I've been having sex for quite some time now and I know that when I cum in a girl then we have sex again, the friction and bodily fluids will create this white foamy substance that comes out. So I'm dating this girl and a while back the white foam came out but I hadn't cum inside her yet. My guess is that the remainders of someone else's semen was inside of her and when she and I had sex it brought it out. After all, that's why the penis is shaped the way it is, isn't it? to displace other male's semen. Anyways, we had a huge fight over it and I kinda broke up with her, I felt bad for breaking up over just a suspicion but mind you, she has broken my trust before, not with cheating, but with small stuff. So we got back together and just today the same thing happened again with the foam. She denies it to no end, and I have no way to prove it. I think shes the kind of person that even when confronted with the truth she would deny it, unless I actually had proof. Am I being unreasonable to break it off again? I know that if I really don't trust her I shouldn't be with her, but sometimes I think I'm being paranoid. And I know the vagina does different secretions, but I know the exact foam and what it looks like and how its formed, and I know her thick creamy cum from her thin lubricating cum and the only way I've seen the foam form there is when sperm have been in there. What do you think guys? Please help!

Before you toss this woman aside you need to get your facts straight. There are many reasons why her discharge during intercourse may be different from time to time. Including how well you are performing in getting her excited before actual intercourse.

The more time spent on foreplay the more excited she will become and the wetter she will be. Now this fluid is meant to lubricate and can be very thin or it can be mucus like depending on many things including how she is feeling that day and her diet.

Then of course there is the type of birth control she may be using. Certain birth control options require the use of spermicides these will look like what you are describing when mixed with her own vaginal fluids. Then of course if she has any type of vaginal infection the medication may be some type of cream put directly into the vagina.

As you can see from the above these are just a few reasons why your girlfriend may be having different types of discharges during intercourse with you. From my own experience with my wife having sex before going out for the evening and again when coming home I have not seen a change in her fluid discharge on me or the sheets. I would say that unless it is immediately and I do mean immediately after she has sex with someone that you have sex with her. You would not see a difference in vaginal discharge as most of the fluids would have drained or been absorbed by the time you and she had sex.

Are you being paranoid? I think so, you have nothing to actually prove she is not being faithful for as you can see there are many reasons why her discharge can be different each time you have sex.

Not trusting her is a whole different story and has little to do with sex or cheating on you, it is more of an instinctive reaction. The trust I'm speaking of comes when she says she is not cheating on you. If you do not believe you then leave her. Just do not base your reasons on the discharge you see during sex because you are most likely wrong in your reasoning.

i have been with my current bf now for just over 3 years, like every relationship we have our ups and downs. He is six months younger then me (22) and he can be very immature and frustrating at time. I have recently been to a party with my friends and i saw this really cute bloke we got talking and flirted a little and exchanged numbers. Its save to safe to say i have a major crush on/fancy this guy, he is 36 and recently divorced with 2 kids. I have just round out that he related to my current bf through his parents marriage. To say that i am confused about it all is an understatement.....please help me make sense of all this

First a male at 22 is going to be less mature than a female of the same age so take that into consideration when choosing which guy you want to be with. There is a 14 year difference between you and the guy you fancy. Once again there is a big difference in maturity levels as well as age. He is going to be far more settled in his ways. He has already done the nightlife things that you are just now experiencing and will be far more comfortable sitting at home reading or watching a game on TV. There is also the fact of his two children that he will want to make time for. Time which you may want from him.

The fact that he is related to your current boyfriend through his parents marriage may not be a real issue. It depends how far down the family tree the relationship goes. I believe we all have cousins through our parents we never see or speak too as we travel in different circles or they are second, third or fourth cousins. I have a first cousin who never sees his first cousins on his mothers side of the family and they live less than an hour apart. They just have nothing in common. I don't see the relationship of BF 1 to BF 2 being an issue.

While we cannot and should not tell you what to do what I think is best given the ages involved is to try and mature your current boyfriend. I think in the end you will either be happier or you will move on to another guy closed to your own age. The 14 years difference in ages between you can be just a number. More often than not it becomes an issue at some point in the future when you still young enough to want to go out and enjoy things and he is older and wants to stay in and relax.

can you seriously date a girl who said they had a mmf three some in the past?

Why not, we live in the present and the future. Would you want her to hold it against you if you had a FFM threesome in the past.

What happens in the past stays in the past. What counts is what happens today, tomorrow and beyond between the two of you. We live in a sexually free society if you can't live with someone's sexual history then you may be a very lonely person.

I want to sex with my gf how to convince her?

The fact of the matter is the word convincing when used in relation to sex equates to sexual harassment. Sexual harassment is today’s hot button and is illegal. You can and be arrested and charged with sexual harassment if you try to convince your girlfriend to have sex with you.

Obviously for whatever reasons she has she has said NO to you as for as having sex with you. NO means NO and you have to accept the fact that she does not what to have sex with you. Whatever her reasons are they are her reasons and she owes you no explanations.

Do not do anything to try and force her to have sex with. Do not say to her; "Have sex with me or I'm leaving you" or "If you love me you will have sex with me." Lines like this are sexual coercion and sexual harassment both of which are illegal and you can be charged with both.

If your horny stick to masturbation or whatever she is willing to do for you to give you relief. To try and convince her to have sex with you is not worth running your life over. She does not have to be the one to make the complaint, anyone who hears you or you or she tells someone what you are trying can make the complaint. So it is possible if you were to try and convince her that talking with the police is in your future. For as I said to begin with sexual harassment is today's hot button and boys as young as 14 have been arrested for doing so.

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