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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
Okay so me and my boyfriend (we'll call him matt) were hanging and his bestfriend, we'll call him pete, comes over with like eighty rolls of toilet paper to tp this kid we all three hate, we'll call him brett. He's just an ass and drew like dicks all over petes and matts cars last week so he wanted to get him back and asked matt to help him. So we go over to the bretts house and were tping and what not and brett comes running out of the hosue and grabs me. I obviously try to get away but hes much much bigger than me and pulls me into his house (his parents were out of town) and locks the door. He puts me in the coat closet and puts a cabinet infront of the door. He calls Matt and tells him to clean it all up or he won't let me go. He goes on to tell him that if they try anything he'll "gladly think of some ways to have some fun" with me... Eventually its all cleaned up and he lets me out. But before he lets me out of the closet he tells me to take off my panties and give them to him. I'm pretty much scared shitless so I do what he says and then he puts me outside. Everythigs just all messed up now...! I feel really really violated and I'm worried about my boyfriend and brett getting into it or something... They're both on the football team so I dont want matt getting hurt in practice and I'm scared this little war thing has gone too far because we didnt know brett was this crazy and that someones gonna get hurt but I don't know what to do or how to help... Advice??? (I'm fifteen, sophomore. My bf and the other two guys, sixteen juniors)
I am old enough to be your grandfather so my advice is going to be somewhat parental in nature.
When Brett demanded your panties that was a form of sexual harassment, close to rape. Locking you in a closet and threatening to keep you there until his yard was cleaned up is unlawful detention and kidnapping; these are serious charges much more serious than TPing his yard. For you, your boyfriend or his friend to say something to him about the seriousness of what he has done to you will mean nothing to him, I'm sure.
What you need to do is inform your parents of what happened. Let them decide what to do. What Brett did was very, very wrong. Holding someone against their will is very scary for the person and extremely dangerous. No one knows what Brett would have done to you had your boyfriend not cleaned up the yard to Brett's satisfaction.
You were not harmed this time; nothing says that the next time something happens that Brett doesn't like, that he won't harm the next person he decides to detain for revenge.
I am again suggesting that you inform your parents and that they inform the police. This is a police matter and they should handle it from here. Intervention now will may save someone from harm in the future as well as correcting Brett's behavior now before he has the opportunity to harm some one.
is it proper for a business man to wear a striped shirt instead of a solid one? to me proper business atire is usually a solid white or light blue shirt
A light pin stripe shirt with dark suit is correct office attire. If you are working i an old established firm with deep roots you may want to follow office tradition with the solid color shirts. If you are a Lawyer going to court a solid shirt is more proper. In all other instances proper office fashion is what ever the fashion of the day is. In many offices it is business casual, which is dress slacks and dress shirt, no tie for men or Polo shirt.
If you are going for an interview error on the side of caution and dress for success and go with the solid white shirt and tie.
I was raped a few months ago. I was a virgin and the guy knew that. I just feel so empty and confused all the time now. My parents know and I see a counselor, but nothing really helps this feeling go away. I have a lawyer and they're trying to get something done, but so far nothing because my last detective chose to believe the guys over me. I just don't know how to shake this feeling or move past this. I don't know what to do. Advice?
I'm sorry you were raped, no women should have to endure such a horrible crime and then be told in essence she is a liar as well. I thought the time when all I guy had to do was to get 4 or 5 of his friends to say she was a party girl and the rape charge went away was long gone.
A girl or a guy for that matter, can say no at any time even after intercourse has started. If the guy does not stop once you say stop from that point on it is rape. The law is very black and white on the subject. If the local District Attorney or States Attorney will file charges then ask your attorney to look at applicable federal laws. In the hairs on the back of my neck are telling me local District or States Attorney has never been contacted. Your lawyer should confirm this him or herself.
Where I live in Maryland any rape charge has to be reviewed by the County States Attorneys office. A detective does not have a choice in whether or not to file charges or make the arrest. The detectives follows the directions given by the States Attorneys office.
Short of murder rape is the most horrible of crimes. As a victim it is going to take time to get past this and on with your life. I say past this as you never fully get over it. You are in counseling which is good. You may also want to contact your local rape crisis center as they can also help you.
You may also want to look at this website: http://www.rainn.org/. RAINN stands for Rape,Abuse,Incest, National Network. They also operate a 24 hour hot-line staffed by trained staff who are there to help you.
Once again, I'm sorry for the what you have had to endure. Things will get better with time and the proper help.
okay....i have had a really fucked up life... see i was adopted...and when i was little my adoptive mother has always threaten to send me back with my biological parents...but i feel like it would be better because then i would know someone loves me. and i hate how my mother never lets me see thm, i mean i know that they gave me up for adoption but i would think about my kid everyday and just wish that i could have them back in my arms again, and is it to hard for my mother to let me fulfill that wish for them. and everytyme i think about my real parents i fall into depression, and i dont know what to do...can you help me?
another problem....recently my best friend has started to hate me... i mean i dont think i did anything wrong except be there for her, but she became best friends with this girl that i have never liked, i mean shes a slut. and now shes turning her into one...but anyways. everytime i think about her i think aboout all the fun times we had and everything and i begin to cry. and i know shes over me but i dont think i can let go of somehing that meant so much to me. and she doesnt even talk to me. and it makes me sad. how can i find a way to get my mind off of her?
other problem...lately my mom has been taking up drinking to comfort her pain. because my aunt has recently passed away. and ever since then shes ben a real bitch and been bitching at everyone. and yesterday she made my 26 year old sister cry. i mean what can i do to block all this out??
i mean no one knows about any of my problems....i have always put on a mask and put on a smile but it hurts on the inside.. and latel i have been trying let it all out but every time i do someone starts bitching and says im always trying to get attention and that i dont have problems and im making it up... and
lately i dont know what else to do than cry.. so can you please help me?? i could really use some advice...
signed,
lost and abandoned
14
There was a reason your biological mother gave you up for adoption. Just what that reason was we do not know. You say your adoptive mother won't let you see your biological mother letting us believe that you or she is aware of who that is. Generally adoption records are sealed so that the child and the adoptive parents do not know who the biological parents are.
While it has gotten easier to break that seal in recent years you need a good reason to do so. When you are 18 if you still wish to do so and you do not know who your biological parents are, you can start to search for them. A word of warning about doing so; not all searches for a biological parent end up like we see in the news so do not set yourself up for a big fall when you start your search as it is just possible your biological parents may not want to see you. Why would this be? One reason that comes to mind is you could be the result of rape or incest, it happens.
As to your mothers drinking: I'm going to recommend you look at the following web site to find a chapter of alateen in your town. This organization can help you deal with a parent who drinks to much.
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/alateen.html
Last I am going to recommend that you ask your mom to take you to your family doctor. Ask to speak to the doctor alone. You are old enough that the doctor needs to maintain your confidence in an area like this. Tell the doctor or show the doctor what you wrote to us and ask to be referred to a therapist who you can go to for talk therapy. Talk therapy will help you work through all of the problems you have listed here and help you address them in an adult manner, including what you may learn at alateen meetings.
Okay my best friend just told me shes bi..And im a girl to.I dont know what to do, should I still be her friend or should I like not be..Im kinda creeped out cause I dont want her to like hit on me or nething.What should I do? Im only 14 to what should I do
I am old enough to be your grandfather and maybe the maturity of my age will help you decide what to do if the advice fro the other advisers has not already done so.
You friend is today the same person she was the day before she came out to you about her sexuality. This was a big step for her; one that not only took a lot of courage bit showed how much she trusts you to keep her trust (secret).
She is still the same person she was before she told you she is bi, you can still do all the things you did together before she told you. Whatever those things that young girls do together, make-up parties, sleep-overs, double dates nothings changed.
To be frank is this young lady is the same age as you she may not be a confirmed bi as at your age teenagers, boys and girls are still searching out their sexuality. Puberty and the resulting changes caused by the new hormones raging through your bodies are causing her to explore her sexuality in away that is different from how you are.
In college I found, and so will you, a large number of girls who were bi that today are as straight as an arrow. Why was this. For one thing it was safer to have sex with say a roommate or dorm-mate, it was more convenient and it relieved the sexual tension that builds up.
There is nothing wrong with being bi or gay. If you want or feel you have to; tell your girlfriend that your happy for her but you are not into a bi lifestyle but want to remain friends and ask her not to try and get you to try any lesbian sex with her.
i found out i was 8 weeks pregnant and went to planned parenthood 10/8. i took a pill for the abortion there. they then gave me 3 sets of pills, one for nausea, one for antibiotics, and one for the actual abortion process. i got pain pills too (hydrocodone 5 mg) from the doctor.
after i took the abortion pills at home, it was the worst pain of my life. the pain pills i got didnt help at all. and when the pain stopped, i was so happy and relieved.
however, starting about a few days ago, i have been having terrible pain.
i have sharp pains in my stomach, it hurts to get up and do anything, and i have horrible cramping. its almost like a menstral period, however the pain is really unbearable. i had to work today and just had the heating pad on my stomach crying, it hurt that bad.
i feel that something may be wrong with me. i am worried and do not have my appointment for a follow-up until 10/23.
is it possible the abortion didn't work?
i thought i was supposed to feel better by now, not worse.
please help. thank you very much
18/f
If you have not already seen a doctor and are still in pain you need to see a doctor immediately. It is possible that you did not fully abort. I would suggest you go to the nearest hospital emergency room. Do not worry about the cost if your are uninsured. The law requires them to treat you first and worry about payment second.
If you have not fully aborted there are several complications that need to be addressed immediately to protect not only your health but your ability to have future children. Do not wait any longer. Go to the emergency room now, today.
15/f
i was talking to my boyfriend and we started talking about sex (we were sending dirty messages etc. no pix). a little while later we started talking about our future and he said that he wanted to have sex for real and asked how i felt about it. i told him i wanted to stay a virgin and he told me that hurt his feelings and he got mad. then i got mad at him for thinking i would actually just hop in bed with him and we got into a fight. he said he was sorry but im still mad. what do i do?
I am old enough to be your grandfather so my advice will be a little different than the other advisors, although I agree with the two before me.
If the boy you are seeing does not respect you enough to respect your wishes then he does not deserve you. Teenage boys of your same age are about 2 years younger than you in maturity. They also commonly mistake lust and love for the same thing, meaning if you love me you will have sex with me. Also boys need to have some form of sex, not necessarily intercourse, to release the pent up hormones raging through their bodies.
They can accomplish this through self-masturbation or a girlfriend can, if she is willing, give him a hand job or blow job. Either of which does not require either of you to undress. Once you let him talk you into undress, say for visual stimulation, you are starting down a dangerous road to loosing you virginity.
I am not recommending you do anything for him, this is entirely up to you. When it comes to sex, now or in the future both parties must be willing or it could be rape or not very satisfying for either partner. Always remember that no means no and impress than on you present and future boyfriends.
I'm including a web address for you to look at that I have recommended to other young ladies who have written us when they were ready to have sex for the first time. You may want to look at it and keep it bookmarked for when you are ready.
http://www.pamf.org/teen/sex/virginity/readyornot.html.
13/m Sometimes my mom touches me down there on my thing. She has for years now and never says anything about it. We were talking in sex ed and I realize this is like sexual abuse and is bad. Who do I contact about this so she stops? Just like local police or what? I don't want to ask in class. It's embarrassing. Is there like sex abuse hotline or 1-800 number I call?
First off let me say I am old enough to be your grandfather. You are correct mom should not be touching your private area at your age. Before calling the cops I would suggest you talk to someone at school. A trusted teacher, Principal or guidance councilor are the ones that come to mind.
You did not say how mom touches you. Is it in a sexual nature or is it more like a mom touch? Mom may not realize you are not her little boy anymore and touching you in this matter is not only wrong but makes you uncomfortable.
By talking to another adult not associated with your family they can help you decide what type of touching mom is doing. If it is a mom type touch they can call mom to school for a parent conference and discuss this with her at that time. Explaining that you are uncomfortable with her touching and explain to her why she needs to stop. If it is a sexual type touch they will take the action required to keep you safe.
Do not wait, go to school tomorrow and talk to someone.
okay me and my boyfriend had sex and when i looked down i saw blood. i thought it was me but my boyfriend looked and it turns out that his penis head like cracked like dry skin on hands. well he said its becasue we were both dry and i get that but it shouldnt do that and i keep asking if i can see it he also said that its okay now but i think hes afraid to have sex again he kinda got blood in me so i took a shower to get it out i dont know why this happend am i okay is he okay how can we prevent this?
You need to see a Gyn. and explain to the doctor what happened. Your boyfriend needs to see a Urologist. Is is quite possible the blood is not from any skin cracks but from when he ejaculated. One way to find this out is to masturbate him to climax.
Being checked for STD is always a good idea, while I am not a doctor I feel your boy friends problem is not an STD but something else. Urge him to see his doctor and ask see a Urologist.
ok im single male 41 yrs old, always have been 100% dorky but now gianned weight with age. nevr have been any good with females at all. started masturbating and continued regular since high school about 5 times a day. lately i have been experimenting with cross dressing in panties as a way to get off, as the regular got manotinous. my doctor told me that its like doing drugs i have to keep upping the ante for same effects.
my question is - i have NO feelings for dudes or being a women , but does wearing panties make me gay or bi, even though i have none of those thoughts or feelings or is it just being a horny lonley guy?
My thoughts on your question my answer would be no.
Off the subject a bit. After reading your question and just to satisfy my own curiosity I went on the web and typed in "Men's Thongs". These are not something I would wear but I wanted to see the difference between a male and female thong. I discovered in style there was not much difference. In construction most are made of cotton and constructed to accommodate the penis flap. The female thong has a larger variety of material including cotton. I then went on to check male underwear vs female panties. While my results are certainly not scientific my research found: today there is not much difference between the male new style of underwear pants and female panties. In the female department you can even find "Y" fronts for women.
My conclusion, You can't judge or shouldn't judge a book by it's cover. Meaning what a person wears does not make them gay or anything else for that matter.
A friend of mine, married and now with two children, make up one morning when newly married found that his wife had not done the laundry. The only clean underpants were her panties. Being the same waist size he had no choice but to wear her panties to work that day. He claims so doing resulted in the conception of their first child. Should I label him a closet homosexual? I don't think so. To this day they both interchange their underpants.
If your comfortable with this then to hell with what anyone else thinks. I might add finding a new doctor would be a good idea.
I think you miss understood my answer: What I so politely was trying to say was; wearing womens panties or cross dressing does not make you gay! Your sex life is your own as long as your comfortable with your sex life to hell with what other may think. I would give the same advise to swingers, nudists and other sexual lifestyles. As long as no one is hurt by ones life choices I say to heck with what they think, it is not their life. I hope I have clarified my thoughts for you.
Hi. I'm 16/m and I went to this party last saturday. I dont know what to do now really because it's embarrassing. I was hanging out with this one girl and we were drinking. I know I drank too much and I shouldn't have kept at it but everyone else was doing it and I guess I wasn't thinking. Anyway, we were kissing and fooling around a little but I didn't want things to get serious by leading to sex. The other guys ended up leaving us in this room after awhile and we were alone but by then I was pretty drunk. She took off her top and it was nice to see so we did keep fooling around. Then I think she took advantage of me because I was so drunk. I mean she had been drinking too but I told her at one point that I didn't want to go further. My thing reacted to some stuff she was doing (like she was stripping and it seemed sexy?) but I could not control it to get it to go down and stop. She ended up having sex with me but I remember telling her I didn't want to do it. I remember that but then the rest is kind of hazy and I ended up waking up in a bed in another room all alone and without my clothes on. It was... kind of obvious I had had sex.
Now everybody knows we had sex because she told a lot of people we did it. I'm embarrassed becuse she was my first and nobody knew I was a virgin and I really think she just... raped me. I told her I didn't want to before we were doing it and when she was doing stuff to me. I was so drunk I couldn't stop her. I know I'm such a wuss and I feel like such a loser. I am ashamed. I feel so bad and USED by this girl. I can't stop thinking about it. I feel like I'm trash.
What do I do? I know you see on tv where they say to go to the cops but I'm a guy and I don't want them to think I'm lying. I'm not lying. I really think it was rape. I didn't want to have sex. I told her I didn't want to do it. I was just drinking and having fun w/my friends. I didn't think it would lead to something like that and I remember making myself clear about not wanting to do it. What do I do now? If I tell everybody is going to make fun of me for whining about having sex. I didn't want it though!
I'm old enough to be your grandfather. Hopefully you will read and heed my advice.
While it is harder for a male to prove rape then a female it is still possible for a male to be raped. The feeling that at some point the male has to cooperate is old theory.
I'm not going to lecture you on underage drinking other than to say there is good reason for this, you even gave one: "I know I drank too much and I shouldn't have kept at it but everyone else was doing it and I guess I wasn't thinking." Okay, stay away from the booze until your body and mind are old enough and of legal age to handle it.
Next, like it or not you need to sit down with your parents to tell them exactly what went on, where you were, who was there and most importantly who the girl was. Your parent will have to decide how to proceed from here. Calling the police and asking their advice is the proper thing to do. I would also suggest they call a rape crisis center to get you some counseling so that you can work through this.
You may think your friends will support the girl. In a group maybe so but I wouldn't count on it if I were her and all of you are under age and drinking. When the police handcuff them and take them to the station to interview them and process them on the underage drinking charge they will tell the truth
Girls are as bad if not worse then boys when it comes to bragging. She is bound to tell her friends what happened between you. If she knows she was your first then she will brag that she got your cherry.
The police will find all this out. You just have to let them do what they do best. Will it be embarrassing for you? It properly will be, just remember you are a victim of a crime. You have a right to see justice served.
Remember one thing through all of this: NO means NO and STOP means STOP no matter who is saying it. When you said stop the girl should have done so. Anything that happened after the first time you said no, I don't want to or stop is rape. It does not make a difference male or female. The first person to say stop if the other person does not stop they become a rapist and the person who said stop is then being raped.
My boyfriend wants to see my vag and I told him OK and planned to take a few pics of it. I kinda told my bff who was like I shouldn't do that cos somebody can hack his phone && get my nude shots later. How safe do u think it is to take pictures of my vagina && send them to his cell phone?
DON''T DO IT. Not only is not safe; it is illegal in just about all 50 States. Even if you take your own picture his having the picture has him receiving child pornography and you are a child pornographer. The laws on child pornography are very limited in scope. They are virtually black and white with little or no gray area, for good reason.
This reason alone should be reason enough not to take these pictures. Having been a teenage boy myself at one time I can tell you the chances of him keeping these pictures to himself are zero, nil, zilch. Teenage boys love to brag. At some point he is going to have to show his cards if he is going to retain his bragging rights. That is when your picture gets past around. Now with Facebook, myspace and other social web pages your picture will go viral. Can't happen? Pick up the newspaper and read about some other girls it has happened to.
While I really do not recommend this; if you really think your boyfriend should see your vagina, then take him someplace private and lift your skirt and pull your panties aside. But don't whatever you do let him take pictures.
I've been married to my beautiful wife for 3 years now. I told her I'd do anything in the world to make her happy and to please her. About a week ago she confessed to me that she wants to experiment with other men. She wants to actually have sex with another man to see what it's like since she has only been with one other man before our marriage. I can't really overcome this and it makes me feel like a bad husband. I told her I'd have to think about a lot of things first. She said that it's the only way she'll be completely happy in this marriage. What do I do? I feel like if I say yes then I am degrading myself and this marriage, but if I say no then I'm holding her back from what will truly make her happiest in this world.
The other three advisers seem to be of one mind and I agree with them. I myself will be married 40 years come next July and while it is nice to have fantasies that is all they should be fantasies.
I'm going to go out on a limb here and suggest there is something else going on here. Just what that problem is I can only guess at. What I feel is that the problem is not her lack of experience with sex partners prior to marriage.
It could be an infatuation with someone who is chatting her up, as our British cousins would say, and wants your permission to sleep with him rather than cheat on you. It could be her girlfriends have convinced her something is missing in your sex life; but I really don't feel as I have said it is a lack of experience on her part.
I would suggest that you two seek marriage counseling to resolve this issue and find out what the real problem is. You could ask your family doctor to recommend a counselor but I would for this purpose stay away from a member of the clergy as your counselor.
I'm not sure if your wife is trying to spare your feelings here; as in my first reason for your wife wanting to have an extramarital experience, or if she is just being naive and selfish.
Just remember the old adage; "What is good for the goose is good for the gander". You can ask your wife how she would feel if you were to ask her if it is okay for you to sleep with another women. Whatever her answer is, if you want to save your marriage you need to find a good marriage counselor and start getting counseling ASAP.
Just a side note here: My view on sex and sex in marriage is that as long as both parties are comfortable with something then go ahead. But if one party is resistant they should not be forced to do it. This applies to just about everything in a relationship especially sex. If you want to be swingers and have an open marriage and you and your wife are both in agreement, then fine. It is no ones business but yours. But, if either one is reluctant, that party should not be forced or coerced into doing something they are not comfortable with.
How do you know which hole the penis should be inserted in?
While many women enjoy anal sex, the penis is meant to go into the vagina or the purpose of procreation.
My question to you is: If you do not know which hole the penis is meant for are you old enough and mature enough to be having sex in the first place.?
I am a 45 year old male. I served in the army for 20 years. I was medically discharged due to a negligent life threatening parachute collision. I could not live without being in the army. So on my last day before heading off on holidays, I went up to my room on the barracks and swallowed in excess of 300 tablets. Previously I had been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome (PTSD) of which I was taking a cocktail of drugs. On top of that I was also taking a cocktail of drugs for the pain from my parachute injuries.So I swallowed the pills...wrote my goodbye letter to my wife and 4 daughters. Unfortunately I woke up in hospital. 2 years later I slashed my left wrist and I was bleeding into a bucket whilst talking to a counsellor...once again I woke up in hospital. I want to die. I can not take this life of mine any more. Please tell 100% how to commit suicide!
I too was in a horrible accident that ended my career forcing me to retire early. I have been in therapy for 5 years as I am still learning how to deal with the disabling pain of my accident and the loss of a job and career I dearly loved.
I can state from experience that suicide is never the answer. Think of your wife and daughters. No matter how much pain you may be in. No matter how depressed you may get at times they still love you and they will miss you terribly if you were to follow through with a suicide plan. I know; for I put my family through a lot while I was sorting out my depression and getting my pain under control.
There is something called the cycle of pain. Pain cause depression; depression causes pain. You have to find away to break or interrupt this cycle.
You need to do three things. First: If you are feeling suicidal at this time pick up the phone and dial 911 or have your wife take you to the nearest emergency room. Second: Find a Pain Management Center to help you with your pain. If the VA does not have one find a civilian pain center. The doctors at the pain center are anesthesiologists who specialize in pain management. I have been seeing my doctor for three years and following his treatment they have reduced my pain from an 8 to 3 or 4 with just medication. Then they added steroid shots and nerve oblations and this reduced the pain levels to a 2. Recently My doctor suggested acupuncture and my pain levels average 0 to 1.
Getting back to the circle of pain; my pain center offers all encompassing pain management. Since depression is part of the cycle for pain I am also treated for depression by a Psychiatrist for medication and a Psychologist for talk therapy.
I am living proof that there is life after a career ending accident. Suicide is not the answer, never was and never will be. No one here will tell you how to do so. What we will do is be here to help you live and find the help you need.
Give life one more try; follow my advise and if I can be of any help feel free to contact me directly, Thank you for serving and whether you beleive this or not your country and your family still need you.
to become a bartender do you already need to know how to mix drinks or will they teach you at the job site?
Most bars what someone who knows how to work a bar and mix drinks before they hire them.
There are bartending schools that you can go to where upon graduating from you are a certified mixologist. The schools are not that long, five or six week and they do offer night classes. The cost at one time was about $600 and most have some type of funding assistance.
So, you know how people have jobs where they make a screen name and go into a chatroom waiting for rapists to IM them so they can catch them?
Like the person says they're thirteen or something to catch child molesters and lure them to an area nearby to arrest them?
Like that Dateline thing.
I'm really interested in doing that.
Can anyone tell me how I can get into doing that?
This is not something you can or should do as a private citizen. There are numerous reasons as to why. The two most important are for your own safety and there are certain prescribed protocols that law enforcement must follow to avoid entrapment claims and build a case.
You do not say how old you are so I will offer this suggestion assuming you are under age. Contact your local, Police or sheriff's Department and tell them of your desire to assist with this. If you are old enough they may offer you a cadets position. If your to young they may sponsor an explorer post and suggest you join.
As a Cadet you will be allowed to do certain things within law enforcement, possibly helping in the area you are interested in. As an explorer you will learn how the police department works and help with some of the internal workings of the department. Then when you are old enough you can move up to Cadet and if you so desire to a Police Officer when you are old enough to carry a weapon.
My boyfriend and I are sexually active and we both like sex a lot haha but I'm kind of into experimenting. He's just happy with whatever I guess, because we talk and are very open about stuff, but he doesn't really have any things he wants to try. Like when I asked him, he said "I love sex already, it couldn't be any better". But the thing is, I kind of want to have rough sex...I'm not sure why but I think that would be a major turn on for me. But I don't really know how to explain to him what I want...like if I said "I want rough sex" he'd probably ask me what exactly I meant by that and I don't really know what to say haha. So basically, how should I explain this to him? And also, if you're a guy, would it be a turn on for you? I know everyone's different but I'd like some other people's opinions :) thanks!
I think you need to be more explicit and know what you mean by rough sex before you ask a boyfriends for "Rough Sex".
Rough Sex can mean a lot of different things to different people. If you mean not to be gentle in your love making that you want it fast and hard then say that. Because rough sex can also mean you want to experiment with BDSM which involves such things as being tied up and possibly beaten. Are you asking your boyfriend for different positions like doggy style where he can smack your ass while making love.
Do you see my point; rough sex means different things to different people so be specific in what your asking for and do not be afraid to spell out exactly what you want. That way you both know what is expected.
I'm 21/F and have had several sexual partners. Right now, I'm in a serious relationship, so my boyfriend and I have sex quite often. The problem is, it just never feels THAT great. There's definitely no orgasm because everyone I know says when you have one, there's no mistake about it. This has got me to realize I don't think I've ever had an orgasm and it scares me. Sex has been pleasurable, just not mind blowing. We do try a few positions, but I'm not sure what to do next. Even when I try by myself, I don't get off. I just want to be able to have an orgasm! What can I (or he) do?
I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you may have received and may continue to receive from others.
The female body is probably the most intricate mechanism on this planet. The fact that you have not had an orgasm yet does not astonish me. You say you find sex pleasurable; which is good as receiving pleasure is 90 percent of what having sex is all about. The fact that you have not had a mind blowing orgasm is negligible at this time, it will eventually happen.
The why of you not having that mind blowing orgasm goes back to my first sentence: the female body is an intricate mechanism, no two are alike. The first problem at the moment is that you are trying to hard which means you are not relaxed enough to have an orgasm. Another problem could be that you are the type of women that needs a lot of foreplay and clitoral stimulation: or you could be like my wife who needs long vaginal stimulation. It also could be that you are not entirely comfortable with where you are having sex. The fact that you can be over heard by or that roommates or parents could walk in on you, all enter into your comfort zone. We also cannot leave out the biggest orgasm killer: will he make me pregnant?
While a man can orgasm at the drop of a hat a women needs comfort and security both with the person she has chosen to mate with and the surroundings in which she is matting. If comfort and security appears to be the problem then you and your mate need to find a better place to have sex. One in which you feel comfortable and safe.
As to whether you are more clitoral or vaginally orgasmic this is something you will need to find out for yourself. Here again surroundings are important. Find someplace where you will be comfortable and not be disturbed. Buy a properly sized dildo and vibrator, you can order them over the web if need be, and masturbate starting with clitoral stimulation. Be genital with yourself if you are not sure just what to do there a guides to masturbation on the web as well.
Once you find out what you need to orgasm don’t be afraid to instruct your boyfriend in how to bring you to orgasm. Remember that no one knows your body better than you so to be fair to your partner you need to tell him what works and does not work. The same is true for him.
Heyy,
Soooo I was eating lunch and this guy Conor put a plastic bag over his head and Conor and two other guys were foolin around with them and Conor stuck in some plastic in his mouth and I had to yell at them for it and tell them what happens. So how would I save someone if they were suffocating on a plastic bag!?
The first thing you do is pull the plastic bag away from their nose and mouth. Check and see if their breathing on their own and if they have a pulse. If they are not breathing have someone call 911 while you check their mouth for an obstruction and clear the airway. IF they are still not breathing but have a pulse you will have to start mouth to mouth resuscitation. If they are not breathing and have no pulse then CPR must be started.
If you do not know how to do CPR or rescue breathing and are over 16 years of age contact your local Chapter of the Red Cross, American Heart Association, Local Fire Department or Hospital to see when the y are scheduling a class.