I finally updated my picture, I thought it was time for an update on it so I picked my favorite picture. After all, my previous picture was almost 2 and a half years old!
My name is Ryan. And I will answer most everything you want to ask to the best of my God given ability.But I will not sugar coat any answer and I will give MY advice. I don't care about my ratings, so don't think giving me a 1 for an answer you don't want to hear will scare me. And if you already know what you should do about a sitaution, don't come to us here at advicenators asking for a second opinion. And here below is a list of questions you should NOT ask on advicenators. Granted some of them may vary and be acceptable, but overall don't ask the below questions on Advicenators.
**Don't ask questions like "OMG i heard this song on the radio with "insert pointless pop lyrics here" and i wanna know what it is so what is it! Thanks!! I rate 5sssss! hearts". This question can be simply googled with the lyrics, or you need only ask a friend
**Don't ask "ok so there is the hott guy/gal in my class and he/she like got me a *insert gift or simple trinket here* do you think he/she likes me?" This is the most common question here on this website sadly. Unless it is vitally important and actually pertains to a feeling of true feelings, don't ask it. This is most asked by teens. And what teens need to learn is "love" is not thinking a guy/girl is sweet and hott and nice. I know love, and it is so far from all those things. Remember Cicero when he said "Out of all the emotions, love is the most violent. Love is madness."
**"Ok so me and my boyfriend had sex last night and we like used no protection omg he came in me do you think i am pregnant?" Ugh. Stupid teens and their hormones. IF YOU HAVE SEX YOU ALWAYS RUN THE RISK OF PREGNANCY, UNLESS YOUR STERILE. And if you don't know anything about sex, you shouldn't be doing it. Even if you "love" your partner, half the time this is a disallusion and you will end up hurt. Sex is for marriage.
**Or asking what's "in" for fashion, or what they should wear out tonight. Or what is "cute" and what looks good. Pick and choose for yourself what you like, think for yourself instead of trying to let other people do it for you. Stand up and be yourself.
These are the most common questions I have seen on Advicenators. Now there are a few questions that are very good questions and deserve the 3 rating and the best answer possible. But they are usually blocked out with the kinds of questions listed above. If you want to ask something, check the following off that I am listing.
1.Does the question pertain to anything important or trivial?
2.Is proper grammar used?
3.Is the question long and in one paragraph?
4.Is it a question that you yourself can answer?
5.Is there enough detail?
Following those 5 guidelines, you can write a good 3 point answer. That about wraps it up.
I spend alot of time online and here on advicenators, so if you ever need anything then just send something in my inbox or IM me. I'm not opposed to helping people at all, in fact I love doing it. I just want some people to wake up from asking a stupid question.
Thank you all for your time.
Gnothi seauton - Know thyself My Motto
E-mail: alpha_0mega345@yahoo.com
Gender: Male
Location: New Palestine, Indiana
Occupation: Movie Theater Employee
Age: 17
AIM: Alpha0mega345
Yahoo: alpha_0mega345@yahoo.com
MSN: AlphaOmega345@hotmail.com
Member Since: July 13, 2005
Answers: 496
Last Update: May 17, 2008
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Ok well im a 17/f and me and my boyfriend have sexand everything but like 4 months ago his condom broke and we didnt know it and now im pregnant. Well i want to keep the baby and my parents are all for me and any choice i make about the baby. Well my boyfriend and me are decieding if we should keep the baby and he wants to help raise the child if we decide to keep it. well i dont know if i should keep the baby. you see i will be able too because i act very mature for my age, i already moved out of my house when i was 16 because of family issues and i already have 1 child( i was raped when i 14 and i didnt give her up for adoption) what should i do should i keep the baby or give it up? (link)
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If your parents, boyfriend, and you are all for keeping your baby, then by all means keep it! It sounds to me like you are plently prepared to take of it and everyone is being supportive of it so you should be fine for sure. You have no reason to give it up for adoption, none at all unless you want to give it up for adoption, which is entirely your choice. But my advice is you should definately keep your baby and raise it yourself with your boyfriend.
Hope this helps and you make the right choice for you and the baby!
-Ryan
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all of my friends are some of the nicest people in the world...but my dad just doesn't seem to like any of them. he always calls them brats or says that i can't hang out with them. they've all met him, and i keep telling him how great they are...but he just doesn't listen. how do i get him to see how amazing ALL my friends are? (link)
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Find out why your dad doesn't like them. Ask him what his big deal is with your friends. Maybe he just doesn't like them or maybe he has some specific reason, I don't know. But talk to him and find out why so then maybe you can change his views. Try and give him more than enough reasons to like your friends, tell about their accomplishments and how great they are. Give him no reason to doubt how great they are.
Hope this helps and your dad see's your friends like you see them.
-Ryan
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Okay well yesterday was my first day of a new school. I didnt know anyone but I met this guy and we kind of walked together and sat with each other at the schedule place. He's so cute and really cool, i dont have any classes with him...how do i get to know him? I dont have his number or intantmessanger. (link)
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Hang out with him during the time before school/after school. Also next time you see him, definately get his screenname that way you can atleast talk to him and then maybe after you have gotten to know him a bit better you can ask to hangout sometime.
Hope this helps and you get some hang out time with him.
-Ryan
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so my friend is like super hott and i am not a lezbo and she doesnt think so but she tries to kill herself and i have tried to like help her out but i am running out of ideas and i dont know what to do but telll her i am there for her and her friends are too but she wont belive me and i am kinda going through some of the same things like her away message is like i am going to draw a picture on my wrists i will do it with a razor and after all of my problems will go away i used to do the same thing after my dads accident but i dont any more nd i think she will do something she willl regret........................HELP (link)
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You need to tell an adult so there can be some kind of intervention. You have already tried talking to her, her friends have tried talking to her, but it didn't help so now you need to go get help from a adult. She will probably be mad at you but it is ultimately irrilevant if she is mad or not because you helped her and have possibly given her a new life and or atleast a better one.
I hope this helps and you get help for her right away.
Your in my prayers.
-Ryan
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hey im 14/f my mom thinks that i have been having sex latley because i have alot of guy friends. I told her that im not but she doesn't beleive me. It gets kinda annoying i say i have a stomach ache and shes like u could be pregnant. Im like no i couldn't. But how do i get her 2 trust me around guys? And how can i convince her the im not having sex? I was guna go and get a test at the doctors. but she always says we dont have time. or w/e my moms 30. Please help me... i rate high 4 good answers! (link)
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Wow your mom seems to not be very trusting if she is just going to automatically assume that. It seems like parents are trying to draw clearer lines between friendship between the opposite sexes.
However though, take this into mind...Your mom is 30, that means when she had you, she was 16. Think about it for a second, she may just trying to be a bit protective because she is just afraid that you may follow in her footsteps and make the mistakes she mad when she was your age.
However with this she may be taking it a tad too far. She shouldn't really have a problem with you having alot of guy friends because as you said, they're just friends and shouldn't assume just because you have lots of guy friends your having sex with them.
Talk to her and let her know your not having sex with your guy friends because as you said, you aren't. Keep drilling it in her head that your not, give her reasons to trust you and exploit every opportunity to show to her your trustworthy.
Hope this helps and she lightens up a bit with the trust!
-Ryan
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im not happy where i live. all people want to do here is drink.smoke and act fake. im not like that. i feel like im losing all my friends because they are all either moving or turning like "them" (only wanting to drink.
smoke + act fake) i want to move. but then again i dont. but i need to meet new people and be in a new place.. i feel so helpless.. i may be moving anways but do you think that will help? i just dont feel happy.. i dont know what i need but theres got to be more to life.. the only thing i want to do is move away.. become famous and seek love.. untill then im dying here... does any1 have any advice on that.. and thanks!! (link)
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There is always more to life, even if you can't see it. And as the advisor before me said, there is always life in Jesus, always always!
Stand strong in what you believe in and let everyone know that your not going to change to be like them. I believe conformity is one of the biggest dangers facing the already decrept and corrupt society we all must live in today. I am very much againts conformity for society and I am thrilled to see you aren't going to conform to the society where you live and your not like them.
My advice is, if you can move, do it. The friends who havn't turned into "them" have already taken the initiative to move. Find a new place and start over in a better place (if it is better, but sounds like most anyplace is better than where you live). But if you aren't going to move then make your stand on your beliefs. Cling to your beliefs and your friends that are still not like everyone else and let everyone where you live know what their doing is wrong, make a stand to make a change.
Personaly...I would do the second option I listed myself, because it would be a chance to strike back at society and try and change it and I would try to do that until they either drove me outta where I lived or I make a change, but that is just me.
You do what you feel you must do. I hope I helped and that you find more to life than you see now.
-Ryan
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how do you get your boyfriend to stop cutting..? please help me..=( (link)
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You really need the find the reason for his cutting, it could be anything but just find out why he is doing it. Talk to him and be there for him, try and talk him out of it but if you can't then you definately need to tell an adult about it. But first talk to him about it and try and find out why he is doing it so he can stop. Be a friend and let him know how much he will be misses, even if he doesn't think no one will. Let him know YOU will miss him and how devastated you will be (which you will I am sure) if he were to die. Be a friend and talk to him, let him know you care.
I very much hope I helped and that you can get him to stop, good luck to you.
You are in my prayers.
-Ryan
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Well there is this kid we met this year and we went out together at one point but then we broke up and we were still friends. But now he hates me and won't talk to me and I have no idea why. What should I do I'll rate high! I'm female/13 (link)
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Don't come to the conclusion he hates you just yet. Find out why he isn't talking to you and see if you can't fix it. A friend is a terrible thing to lose and if you can find out why he isn't talking to you, then fix so you can keep being friends.
Hope I helped and things get better.
-Ryan
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Well, I have been VERY depressed lately about different things. My dad makes me really mad. I'm tired of being depressed. I can't get to sleep at night. I hate it. My best friend is wonderful and she tries to help me. But nothing works. EVER! I feel so bad because she tries her best. I love her so much for helping me. I'm just.. I don't know. I'm always sad. I need help. And I can't afford some REAL help, if you know what I mean. SO.. Does anyone have any advice?? I will rate 4s and 5s!! (link)
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I've been through this before and still go through it. Depression can really take it out of you and that may be the cause of your lack of sleep at night, it did with me. What I found best to do in regards to this is try and occupy your mind with other things other than what can make you depressed (this website and my advice column are two of the big ventelators I have to relieve my stress and help the depression I feel). You can try taking up some kind of extra-curricular activity when school starts and also try excersizing, I've found it is a VERY good way to take your mind off whatever may be getting you depressed.
Keep talking to your best friend because she has proved she is going to be there to listen to you. Whenever your feeling depressed go to her and let her know your feelings, it can help alot more than you know because I also have a friend that I CONSTANTLY go to when I am depressed for any reason at all.
As for your dad, I don't know why he makes you so mad, but try and talk to him about it. Let him know your mad at whatever it is he does and try and work it out from there.
Also another thing that really helped me through depression is prayer. You would be surprised at how useful and uplifting it is when your like that. You have to understand God lets everything happen for a reason, we don't know the reason, but eventually we will after it is over, said, and done.
Good luck with this and I hope everything turns out alright.
-Ryan
P.S. I don't believe in taking medicine for depression, I believe it only creates a front for you to hide behind.
If you need anything drop something in my inbox or IM me at Alpha0mega345
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Ok, I'm 13 (14 next week), 5'1", and 161 pounds. I'm very overweight. Embarrasing, but it's the truth. I need to lose weight. I really want to lose like 50 pounds by Christmas possibly sooner. My mom was going to order the Nutrisystem foods for me but it has been delayed(probably cancelled) cuz we just can't afford spening 300 dollars on something like that right now. Is there anything else out there that can help me?! I don't want diet pills or ebooks but maybe some type of prepackaged food meals that maybe are a little cheaper. Or like a diet plan just for me that doesn't cost much!!! (link)
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Lots of excersize, the surefire way to lose weight is lots of running and excersizing. That cooperated with good eating habits (low intake of fatty, greasy, or sweet foods and more wholesome and balanced meals) can help a person lose weight in no time. Also with excerzing you get a more improved body, which will help you feel better about yourself.
Good luck with the weight loss and hope this advice helped.
-Ryan
P.S. The prepacked food deal..it might just be better to make your own healthy meals, its cheaper and you get expierence in knowing what foods work for you.
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ok im gonna try and make this short. me and my boyfriend broke up in march. but we still talk like were goin out like we still say i love you and everything. but than the other day i got asked out by another guy and i said yea. but when my xbf found out he was mad. and start sayin i thought you loved me and everything. so i broke up with my recent bf. cuz i still have feelings for my x i dont know what to do cuz my x says things will never be the same between us again so i dont know if i should move on or what someone please help me i rate high!!! (link)
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You need to move on for sure. Your boyfriend has already said there will never be anything with you two again so you need to move on. You never want to dwell too much on the past, but dwell more about the present, because the present leads to the future. So how you take the present is how you take the future. If your already broke up then there is nothing holding you back to go with another guy other than your feelings. It's only natural to still feel something for your ex boyfriend/girlfriend after a breakup. But eventually your gonna have to get over it and just move on, like I said before. Hope this helps and you get everything straitened out!
-Ryan
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basically i feel like im losing my friends and lately i have been really depressed. Nobody would really know because well i put up a front and i feel like im losing all the friends i had. I dont wanna hear advice like "try to get together with them" or "sorry" i just wanna know what to do to feel better and be more social. (link)
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I've been in the same situation before very recently. I felt so increadibly depressed and like I was losing my friends because when I tried to talk to them they really didn't talk back and I didn't get to see them all that much (I figure this all started about a week before school let out). I had been struggling with depression anyway but this whole thing really didn't help. My advice is to just try and keep being a friend to them. Also to feel better and to have a source to vent out of, try talking to the friends you still know are your friends for sure and tell them what your feeling, I will gaurantee it will help because that's what I did.
And about being more social, that just depends on who you are. Some people are just naturally outgoing and make friends extremely easy. While others are shy and tend to have more trouble making friends and becoming more "outgoing". To become more social in any case, you need to be more active in talking to people, doing things for other people, and participating in social events and activities.
If you want or need anything else, leave me something in my inbox or IM me at Alpha0mega345 (if using AIM). I hope my advice helps and you make more and better friends and maybe mend the friendships that you think are falling apart!
-Ryan
P.S. Ignore TwistedSister17's comment, it was uncalled for.
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O.K. My boyfriend cheated on me like... 3 weeks ago. I forgave him, as long as he never did it again. It was pretty hard trusting him again after that, but I did. After I had THOUGHT I had gained nothing but love and respect for him again... he CHEATED ON ME AGAIN with my sister! I know it's pretty weird but I don't trust EITHER one of them. How can get over the fact that my OWN sister could do that to me? I miss my boyfriend but I have been hurt enough and don't NEED him in my life. I love my sister but what she did was wrong and I have still not forgiven her.
I can't believe this could ACTUALLY happen to me! I'm so depressed all the time and I have lost hope in ever finding the right guy again! I really thought he was the one for me. He was so right for me, so perfect and then, BOOM! He's sleeping with my sister! I don't know what to do! I'm so confused. I'm so depressed that I'm throwing up and crying non-stop. It's really sad for me. My sister keeps telling me she's sorry but I still have not forgiven her. I haven't even talked to her! Please help! This is really devastating for me and I need someone to tell me what to do!
I rate high!
Katie Marie Sanchez- age 17 (link)
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My philosophy for those who cheat on anything is "once a cheater, always a cheater". First thing you should do is completely get your boyfriend outta your life and even though it's obviously tearing you up inside.
Your sister obviously is sorry because if she wasn't then she would have stopped saying sorry. It sounds to me that she truly is sorry what she has done. Forgiveness is always the right path, no matter what and even if it doesn't seem the best route to go. Forgive your sister and work with her to make yourself get over your boyfriend. I'm sure it is just devastating on you but I'm sure you deserve better than a boyfriend who is willing (and has) cheated on you. You will find someone who will be all the things your old boyfriend was only better and without the cheating. Also try talking to your friends, because I've found nothing can comfort you more than your friends can at times like these.
I'm really very sorry for everything that is going on with you. If you need anything else drop something in my inbox or IM me at Alpha0mega345. I hope this advice helped and everything gets better for you.
Your in my prayers.
-Ryan
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ok well i'm 13 and my boyfriend wants to have sex and i really dont think i'm ready for it.how do i tell him wiht out him thinking i dont like him anymore (link)
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First off your too young for sex, both physically and mentally. Tell him you really like him but your not ready for it (which you aren't) and if he truly likes you then he will agree to wait. But if he gets mad at this then that sex is probably all he wants from you. Sad to say that seems to be how the world works these days, which tears me to pieces. So my advice is simply this, let him know how you feel and that you don't feel your ready for it. If he truly likes you he will have no problem with it and wait, but if he gets mad then I think that would be an indication his feelings for you aren't very true and that should be an indication to you to kick him to the curb. Hope this helps!
-Ryan
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Hey you guys seem to have really good taste in movies. I was wondering if you'd give me any recomendations. Anything that deals with
psychology, drug use or a movie that makes you think. I've seen Thirteen and Spun so anything else would be great. Thanks alot.
(link)
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I would definately suggest The Matrix (and maybe it's sequels, but they aren't as thought provoking, they are more action orientated) because of all the philosophy surrounding it. Every second of that movie has some kind of philophical meaning to it and the analogies you can make from it are absolutely astounding.
Also another movie I would recommend is Constantine because of its questions and answers on the level of faith and the human mind. It may not be as good as the comics (which I consider on e of my favorites), but still the movie stuck out great to me because of its questioning of issues (such as suicide, demonology, the occult, God).
Good luck with the movies and hope I helped!
-Ryan
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ok i am going to the mal on friday to meet up with a close guy friend of mine. he used to think i didnt like him but i did soemthing that convinced him i made a shout on the radio dedicating a song and sayin that i love him, but anyways i like this guy a lot i meet him by a friend of mine she gave him my sn and we have been talkin on the phone and online all the time but on fridau we r plannin to go to the movies my best friend going wit just in case but idk i dont really care about looks he tells me he has the cute face but he has an average body which doesnt bother me but he wants somethin to happenin in the movies except i DONT have to do anything i DONT want to do.. he thinks i can give realy good head because i noe a lot about doing but never have done it be4 i want to try it but then i dont. a friend of mine who is older then told me it taste nasty and has a lot of taste of salt.. is that true?? if so how can you change the taste?? we r not plannin to have sex in the theater we r arent even goin to have sex at all... bc i am a virgin but what should i do?? if i back out of doing it how can i tell without making him think i hate his dick or stuff like that.. thanks! and me and this close friend are plannin to hook up on friday!!
p.s.
can someone give me some tips on giving head/ blow jobs and not websites (link)
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How about just going to the movies for the sake of going to the movies? Seriously don't think you have to do this, because you know what you don't. It sounds to me like all he wants from you is oral sex, which means he really doesn't like you, he just wants to get some kind of sex from you. Just my opinion but I think that's all he really wants and I say to try it, don't do anything in the movies and see what happens. Hope this helps and you have a good time Friday.
-Ryan
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Is 13 old enough to have a boyfriend...not like pair off and go out on an actual date or anything...but to really like a boy and have a first kiss or sumthin...it's not like I want to, but when I see kids in my grade kissing and holding hands and stuff and I'm just curious to whether it's right or if it's silly or if it's age-appropriate...? (link)
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By 13 your old enough to actually start having an interest in the opposite sex so what your asking about is fine. Just don't get into anything serious or the like, because 13 is definately too young for any of that. But for what your asking, yeah it is age appropriate. Hope this helps.
-Ryan
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my friend hooked up with this guy for the first time yesterday...he walked out of the room laughing 5 minutes after they went in and she locked herself in the bathroom...according to the guy...she didnt know how to french so he left her...is there anything i can tell her to make her feel better or any pointes i can give her...ive tried everything, but shes still devistated and i would like to know if theres anything else i can do....thanks!!! (link)
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First, tell your friend what an absolute scumbag that dude was. Tell her not to feel back because she has no reason to be. So what if she can't do that? It shouldn't matter. She should know that the guy she just hooked up with is a asshole. He doesn't care for her and he really only wanted to get with her for the wrong reasons. Just keep letting her know that. Tell her she deserves alot better (because you know what, she does) and be a friend to her. Hope this helps and she gets better.
-Ryan
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hiya
ive been friends with... lets call him bob... for about 3 years. we tried going out about 2 years ago and it felt weird so we both decided to end it. we was only together for like a day.. lame i know but it didnt feel right. anyways recently we have been getting closer like in a friendship way and we also talk about sex ALOT like different posistions (we are both virgins)we talk about doing stuff with each other and joking around and stuff. but recently ive been getting deeper feelings for him. i want him to no how i feel.. i want to be with him but how do i know that it will be the same as last time? i want to tell him but i dont know how i mean how? when? where? how do i know he feels the same way? i dont want to ruin our friendship because we are like best mates but i cant help how i feel. so i need guys advice because i need to know how to say it and how u would react if your best girl mate wanted to date you.
sorry its long!
i rate high!! :D
thanks for any help xx
(p.s we are both 16) (link)
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You were both younger last time, but now that your older it might be different this time around. You need to atleast let him know how you feel and from there see how he feels. You both had something for each other, and even after a break up the feelings should be the same for the person (because if their not then there was no liking to begin with). So he still has to have some feelings for you. Just let him know how you feel and just find out how much he feels for you. Sure it is going to be akward when you tell him and your friendship might suffer a bit, but if he truly is your friend and likes you it will only end up stronger than before.
If one of the girls I know really well and was very good friends with said she liked me and wanted to go out with me then I would, because I have the same situation right now. One of my best friends is a girl and I am just in the same situation as you (without the talking bout sex though and having gone out before) so I can understand your questioning.
Hope this helps and good luck with you two.
-Ryan
P.S. If you need any other advice on this then just send something to my inbox or IM me at Alpha0mega345.
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Does anyone know where to get all the old green day cds? i cant find them anywhere
some are...
Dookie
39 smooth
Kerplunk
Insomniac
Thanks Bundles! (link)
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Ebay definately, they always got stuff I want and their service is very good.
You may also try a used CD store and see if you can't find it there.
But Ebay would be the place I would say to go, they got most everything.
Good luck finding them and hope I helped.
-Ryan
P.S. Greed Day rocks, enough said.
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