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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.

The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.

advice

My friend likes to have sex with his dog! It's so sick! I don't even know what this kind of problem is termed. I have to help him immediately since I know he's not right. What can I do for him? I'm really sorry if this steps on someone's toes, but I just thought someone on this site might be able to help me. Thanks!

The others have said it all. what he is doing is a crime and he needs to be reported to the police. He is also abusing the dog which is also a crime. The others have told you this.

You may think you will be hurting him by reporting him. That is not the way to look at this. By not reporting him you are allowing him to continue to commit these acts which are wrong and not getting the help he needs to stop doing this.

Not everyone that gets arrested is sent to jail for their crimes. A crime such as this one will probably result in a plea bargain where if your boyfriend goes to court ordered psychiatric treatment; any sentence will be suspended provided he attends all doctors appointment. HE may even get Probation before Judgment if he has a good lawyer and this will never appear on his record or will he have to show this as a conviction on any job application. As a PBJ is not a conviction.

More importantly is I would advice you not to have sex with him, protected or unprotected while he is doing what he is doing. If you have had sex with him you need to see your GYN for a check up and a STD panel.

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Hello All, for the past few years I have stood up to my mother and sister. I have helped raised my nephews for years now. They are finally grown and they live on their own now because I won't allow them to live with me anymore. They have done everything you can think of in the past. Examples: robbery, stolen been disrespectful, stabbed one another, brought a gun in my home etc. My mother and sister think I am just being selfish and mean. One works and the other one doesn't my mother supports him totally so much that she can't support herself. I support her I have given her four of my cars in the past. I don't allow them to come over to my home and take advantage of me and my children. I use to cook Sunday dinner I have stopped that as of this past weekend. My oldest nephew recently came and stole food out of my freezer and my mom had the nerve to call me selfish. It's not that I just can't be apart of the enabling anymore. She pays a car note for him and he doesn't work or go to school but, she doesn't have a car. Oh, forgot to mention that Child Welfare took my sisters boys and placed them with me years ago. I am just wondering am I wrong for wanting to live my own life now and putting space between my family and I.

No I don't think your being selfish and in fact you are in a manner you're enabling your nephews. The oldest nephew the one who stole from your freezer.

You told your nephews they were no longer welcome in your home. In stealing from your freezer he committed an act of burglary and theft of food. This is a crime, tough love says you report this to the police. This time it was you, next time it may be someone else and someone gets hurt. The other nephew is committing elder abuse living off your mother when she is not able to support herself because she is supporting him.

This too is a crime, report him and either have mom take the car for herself or give it back to the bank. She should also kick him out of her house. If he is capable of getting a job then let him work. By having his Aunt or grandmother forced, in a manner of speaking, to support him, this is elder abuse no matter how young she may be.

You sound like a good person. You have been raising someone else's children and once again you are called upon to raise someone else's children. Your nephews thanks for parenting them is to steal from you and your mother. No, you report the thefts and elder abuse. You decide if you wish to continue raising your sisters children or ask Child welfare to place then in foster care. That is not being selfish. You deserve a life of your own. You live an honest life and with that comes certain benefits of life, you have more than earned the right to enjoy them.

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I am 16 and I have a huge crush on my attractive female teachers who is like 28 I believe. I am flat out obsessed wit her I;d say, -I always walk by her room or try to go wherever she is and at the end of the day just to see her leave,.i 'm willing to buy any school related paper and yearbook just to see if any pictures of her are in it, I keep thinking she hates me or as a bad impression of me, I went searching for her Facebook account, and I found it and I find myself staring at a lot of pictures of her. I get mad just whenever I see another boy go up and talk to my teacher, but the worst thing of all is that she is married and I can't stand that she is. I have feelings of hate towards her husband just because she is married to him and want him to die and I sometimes like to rip papers up or something pretending it is him or taking a pencil and stabbing the paper with it. I am obsessed with this girl, and I will do anything to get her even it means I have to break up her marriage or something

I believe we have seen this question before. The answers will not change.

You cannot have a relationship with this teacher. For one thing it is illegal for her to have any type of relationship other than student/teacher relationship with you. If she were to have any other type including a sexual relationship with you she would lose her job, go to jail and be labeled a sex offender for the rest of her life.

Your obsession over this teacher is wrong. In fact it is unhealthy for you as you describe it. You need professional help to get over it. You need to talk to your parents about how you feel so you can get the proper help.


It is one thing to have a crush on a teacher but you have gone way overboard. Get some help before you end up hurting yourself, her or her husband.

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i was trying to help my dad today but he got mad because i wasnt doing it right, ive never been so hurt of what he said to me. i cried alot. i feel so alone because my dad was the only person i can really talk to.. i just want to know is it ok if my dad swears at me sometimes?

As a parent I do not think it is okay for a parent to routinely swear at their children. That being said I can see where in the heat of the moment I myself have lost my temper and said things to my child I knew I should not have as soon as the words left my mouth. I apologized for as I said it is not right in my view for a parent to swear at a child.

If this has only happened once then I think your dad is as mad at himself or even more so then you are and as a parent is not sure how to apologize to you. Some parents find it hard or even feel it is wrong for a parent to apologize to a child. They think in so doing they loose some of their parental control or it is a show of weakness when they apologize to a child.

I really can't say how your father feels since I do not know him. What I will say is if this is a one time thing; forgive him and move on. If it is something that is starting to happen more often then there is probably an underlying reason, something that is stressing him that you don't know about.

If mom is there talk to her about what is bothering dad. If mom is not there talk to a trusted teacher about what is happening at home. Verbal abuse such as swearing at you can be considered child abuse. The school will ask to have dad come and talk to them and make him aware of how whatever maybe bother him is upsetting you and offer to help him or get him the help he may need with his problem.

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13/F

A lot of people talk crap about me at school and I'm just getting tired of it. There's nothing I can do, so please don't say "tell someone" or whatever because I've tried everything. But anyways, I'm just getting tired of it and I want to be homeschooled. Some people that talk crap moved to the schools I was thinking about moving to, so they'll just say stuff about me and have MORE people not like me.

How can I talk my mom into letting me be homeschooled? I always have a parent here to homeschool me, so that's situated. But how do I talk my mom into saying "ok"?

I cannot tell you how to talk mom into home schooling you. What you are asking of her is quite a lot. What you are learning today in school mom may have not seen until College. That is how much schooling has changed since she was in school. Yes the subject matter is the same but you have been receiving it at a faster and higher level than mom did. Mom may not be prepared to take on this task. Even your teachers at school go to school to stay up with the subject matter they are teaching as the curriculum and how it is taught changes that fast.

Like anything else though if you truly want to try and convince mom that you want to be home schooled. You need to research the materials and cost of what will be needed. What Mom will need to do to qualify to home school you and what home school certification companies your Board of Education recognizes so that you can be home schooled and what they charge to supervise your schooling.

Once you have done all this then you can go to mom armed with everything she needs to know to make an educated decision about home schooling. It is or may be actually cheaper and give you a better education to find a good private school with smaller classes. Where the teachers can better control the harassing you have been getting.

Most of all you are going to have to tell your parents why you want to be home schooled.

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Hi! So I've been dating this guy for almost a year. And there is a big age difference between us, 8 years. But it works for us. I'm 23 and he's 31. But lately I am starting to get nervous. His older brother has a wife and his parents are completly in love with her. They adore her. But I don't feel like they feel that way about me. They treat us differently. His family is very conservative and proper and I am a huge kid at heart. I get offended over it. When i ask him about it he just says they love me of course but I know he sees it too and is just ignoring it. I'm really offended. Should I walk away even though I love him or what should I do?

Thanks in advanced (:

Razhie's answer is a good one and I support her answer fully. The difference in your ages is just a number it has no real meaning unless you want it to.

My in laws had a five year difference in ages with my mother in-law being the older partner. Back then that was a big no-no. Today a women being older than the man she is looked at much differently and if there is a large difference in at 15 to 20 years she is considered a Cougar and smiled at.

There is only one thing that truly matters in this relationship and that is whether or not you to are truly in love with each other. What other people think; be it his parent, your parent or either of your friends. Has no meaning to your relationship and future together.

Just because his parents treat you differently then his sister in-law is no reason to walk away from a good relationship. It's like throwing the baby out with the bath water you don't do it.

If you two decide to marry his parents attitude will change for you will be his wife not his girlfriend or housemate. The difference is if he chooses to marry you it is because you make him happy and as a parent that is what we want for our children. We want them to be happy and have a good life. If you bring this to him then that is what counts and they will change; you will not have too.

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Hi this is the first time i asked a question about this. Please no rude answers. Sorry i didnt know what subject to pick. When will my period start! I want to get over being scared of it happening. I am 10years old and my mom had hers at age 11 but i also have cousin that had hers at age 9!(I am 10)

The only answer to this question is that your period will start when your body starts to go through puberty and release the hormones that will start your period. Each of of us start puberty at different ages and family history does not always play a factor in when you start.

The fact that your mother started her period when she was 11 does enter into the picture somewhat but you are also made up of half of your fathers genes. Your dominant genes could be his which means you should look to his sister and mother to find out when they started their periods. Somewhere between all of these ages it very possible you will start your period or not as their or things call a dormant gene that that passed to you that they didn't have may be in you that and control when your period starts

There is one other factor. Are you very athletic? Do you train heavily and participate in any sport? If so this will delay you're physical development and period. By that I mean breast growth and your period.

Women Olympic athletes do not get their periods while they are training neither to the fully develop their womanly figures until after they relax their training schedule. Go to UTube and watch recordings of young 14 to 18 year old Olympic athletes. Most are almost flat chested and if you were to ask they they would tell you if they ever had a period while training.

Older Olympic athletes have to stop training if they want to get pregnant. Then resume training after they have their baby.

So in short you will get your period when your body is ready and there is no way to predict when. We can only say what things can delay it such as over exercising like Olympic athletes and being very under weight such as Ballerinas.

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So I'm still pretty young and I havent really done or see much in my short life. But I'm already starting to lose the excitement of life. I'm starting to fear that everythings dull and boring. Like, okay this is gonna sound REALLY stupid and I know its all fake and blahblah but I watch movies like Harry Potter and I see how exciting that is and I know itll never be like that but I wish my life could be as exciting, magical, where I can push myself to the limits and be rebellious and all that. I dont want an ordinary life I want something amazing, something thats worth it. Just how can I do that? How can I find the real excitement? The joy and happiness? How can I get out of the dull and boring? What can I do? To be rebellious and spontaneous and all that I mentioned before? Please help

I wish I knew your age as it would make answering this question easier.

In a sense you are asking what is the meaning of life as well as the difference between life and Hollywood. This is tough question to answer.

When I was a young teenager there were several TV shows about family life. They were the Donna Reed Show, Leave it to Beaver and Father knows Best. None of these show were anything like my home life or the home life of any of my friends and yes we were all to a point quite envious of these shows because our moms were not home to give us cookies and milk after school, are dads didn't come home to dinner on the table at 5:30 and we all rarely sat around and did things in the evening as a family.

That was Hollywood's vision of the American dream. Our homes and family life were reality. But you can have an exciting life if you want one. Maybe not a Harry Potter type life but one just as exciting.

This is the part you may not like, as the excitement starts by choosing the type of education you want to pursue. There are all types of jobs out there to be had and all types of income to be made. You can choose your career path based on making lots of money and be bored most of your life even though you have all the trappings of success. There are also jobs or careers out there where you can make sufficient income to provide for yourself and your family and be challenged every day. This is where excitement comes in, at least at work.

I would have loved my son to become a doctor or a lawyer. When he went into the Army he wanted to be an MP so he could be a police officer when he came out. Somewhere along the way he changed his mind. He is in the medical field he is a firefighter paramedic. He loves the different challenges presented on each shift. He could be a nurse if he wants, he has the training but the nurses job does not present the challenge firefighting and paramedic work does. He saves lives as a firefighter and a paramedic what could be more exciting. For him nothing else. For you maybe you will find a love in Archaeology. I will admit for me that would not excite me or my son. We are adrenaline junkies and firefighting is what challenges us and makes life worth living.

Life is what you make of it. I know a guy who was an engineer because that is what his father told him he wanted him to be. When he was 40 years old he applied for med school and became a doctor and a damn good one too. Becoming a doctor at 40 was tough, its tough for those in their twenties but he did it because he was miserable as an engineer. He made more money as an engineer for his practice as a doctor is in a very rural area but he is happy and he provides for his family.

This has been long though the moral is life is not Hollywood. Life is real and it is what you want to make of it. If you are as young as I believe you may be now is the time to start looking at what excites you. Are you a star gazer or does deep sea exploration excite you. These are the challenges of life that are out there and you need to find the one than excites you and prepare for it with the proper education.

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What are the side effects of,taking the pill trigestrel,if conception may have occured?

It took awhile to find the answer to your question as the drug your taking is the generic form or a should say one of the generic forms of a drug called Triphasil. From what I gathered in my research each drug has some different side effect based on slightly different formulation. The drug your on is favored by family planning clinics that may dispense them free of charge. Below is a list the manufacturers website shows for the drug your on.


Stop using birth control pills and call your doctor at once if you have a serious side effect such as:

sudden numbness or weakness, especially on one side of the body;


sudden and severe headache, confusion, problems with vision, speech, or balance;


chest pain or heavy feeling, pain spreading to the arm or shoulder, nausea, sweating, general ill feeling;


sudden cough, wheezing, rapid breathing, coughing up blood;


pain, swelling, warmth, or redness in one or both legs;


a change in the pattern or severity of migraine headaches;


nausea, upper stomach pain, itching, loss of appetite, dark urine, clay-colored stools, jaundice (yellowing of the skin or eyes);


swelling in your hands, ankles, or feet;


a breast lump; or


symptoms of depression (sleep problems, weakness, tired feeling, mood changes).


Less serious side effects of ethinyl estradiol / levonorgestrel may include:

mild nausea (especially when you first start taking this medicine), vomiting, bloating, stomach cramps;


breast tenderness or swelling, nipple discharge;


freckles or darkening of facial skin, increased hair growth, loss of scalp hair;


changes in weight or appetite;


problems with contact lenses;


vaginal itching or discharge; or


changes in your menstrual periods, decreased sex drive.

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Hey im 15 and from Dublin.for the last year and a half i have been under incredible pressure to drink.because i refused at first i lost a lot of my social standing.my brother and sister started drinking at my age and are just fine.if i was to drink i would get drunk i want to drink socially.i would probably drink once/twice a month but very little.i have only found vague information about drinking effects online and im desperate to know what the consequences of light,social drinking will have on my brain.you have no idea the pressure im under at the moment.i dont want anyone telling me not to drink until im 17/18 because that is not going to happen.i just want to know some definate consequences to my brain.thank you

The advice solidadvice4teens gave you is good advice, it saves me the trouble of having to write the same thing.

There is no pure science on the long term effect of alcohol on the teenage brain. We do know for certain that alcohol is both a stimulant and a depressant. Great contradiction in terms for sure. The contradictions becomes a little clearer in the how and when the alcohol is used. In small doses in proper medical circumstances it is a stimulant and can be very helpful. In great quantities such as what it would take to get drunk it is a depressant.

It also causes you to loose all inhibitions. I don't know if you are sexually active or not thought for this purpose lets assume you are a virgin and intent to stay that way until you are at least 18. The loss of inhibitions caused by the over consumption of alcohol could cause you to be date raped.

Date rape is or has among its charges the inability of the person to consent. Here in the states you are under the age of consent in the first place and being drunk you are unable to consent as well . So if you were to have sex even if the boy said you consented or started it, it is still rape. Plus if you are a virgin you will have lost something very precious.

So to bring this all together it is not so much how many brain cells you will kill, the science is not truly there yet. The biggest danger to underage drinking is in the immaturity of mind and body to handle alcohol and the loss of inhibition that comes with it. For a female this is very dangerous.

You should never be pressured to do something you don't want to do. This includes drinking or having sex. No means no, not maybe, not twist my arm some more. IT means no and stop trying to force me to do something I don't want to do. If these are your friends they should understand. If they don't you need to find new friends.

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As most schools, my school has some nasty tasting food. My mom told me that it's a waste of her money if I don't even like it. She said to look for some ideas of food to put in my lunch bag because I'm very picky and don't really like ham and turkey sandwiches that much(I'll eat it sometimes though). Any ideas of what she can put in my lunch box???

Lunch does not have to be a sandwich. If you are in to fruits and vegetables your mother can pack you a very healthy lunch along with a leftover of dinner from the night before if it was something you like; say fried chicken or a hamburger.

Also mom could make you a salad: Anything from plain lettuce and tomato to a chef salad with dressing on the side in a plastic container like the salad.

There are some great ideas for school lunches on the web. Just enter school lunch ideas into a search engine.

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I really want to have sex but i dont want to get in trouble what should i do

write back and tell us how old you are then you may get some answers to this question.

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So I have been with my boyfriend for two years and we haven't had sex yet. I'm a virgin and whenever we attemp to have sex I freak out for some reason. I don't know why. Any advice for me on why and how I can get over it?

It would be better if I knew your ages before I answered this question.

As a general rule freaking out as you put it is your body overriding your mind telling you it is not ready for sex.

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When I sleep, I always need to put a towel on my pillow and I need to put my hair up in a bun (I hate this). Why? Because my mouth won't close when I sleep and I drool!

How can I keep my mouth shut? I was thinking it's because my nose is clogged and my mouth automatically opens, but I don't know.

I've tried to sleep just on my back, but I'm a rough sleeper so I move around a lot and end up on my stomach or something when I wake up.

So what should I do? I really need your help! I'm 13, by the way.

I'm not a doctor, none of us are. I suffered the same problem when I was your age and younger. While no two of us are exactly alike it may be that your adenoids are enlarged and breathing through your mouth is the only way you can breath laying down and asleep.

I would suggest you discuss this with your parents and ask to be taken to an Eye, Ear, Nose and Throat specialist for an examination. This is the best doctor to determine what the problem you are having is.

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13/F

Whenever I'm mad, I harm myself. For some reason I just scratch myself really bad. I don't use objects, I just use my nails. What's wrong with me? I do this pretty frequently. I used to cut myself, but I don't really do it anymore. I keep scratching myself and I can't stop :(

Wanting to hurt yourself when you get mad or upset is a reaction to a form of depression. At that moment in time you are depressed to the point you need to feel something so you hurt yourself. This is not good and can be treated with the right kind of professional help.

The first thing you need to do is admit you need help, this you have done by writing to us. Next comes the big one; you need to talk to your parents about what you are doing to yourself including when you do this and now you know the reason behind it. You are so upset that you are depressed and need to feel something; this is the reason.

This type of depression is easily treated and starts with a visit to your family doctor or pediatrician to be screened for depression. It is a simple and painless procedure where the doctor while ask you some question; about ten to twenty in all. The doctor may want to do a blood test to check hormone levels but it is rare that they do this.

We have found that teenage depression is more common than we believed. When I was your age, I'm now old enough to be your grandfather, our parents thought it was just a phase we were going through. TO a point they were correct. Today doctors can help you with this phase as the problem is really a hormonal imbalance of one or more chemicals that start secreting into your brain during puberty. The doctor may call it teenage clinical depression.

You should be sent to a Board Certified psychiatrist for medication. Why because this doctor is better trained then your family doctor to find the right medication for you since the hormones secrete into the brain. You are in no way crazy.

You will also be asked to see a clinical psychologist for talk therapy. The therapist is your new best friend that you can tell your deepest and darkest secrets to with total assurance mom and dad will never know what you and the therapist talk about. The goal here is to find those things that trigger you into wanting to hurt yourself and finding better ways to handle them.

The next step is to talk with your parents and ask to be taken to your doctor. When you are with your doctor you can ask to speak to the doctor alone. In this instance I believe the doctor will ask your parent(s) to wait in the waiting room.

To be honest with you if you are found to be depressed you are 1 in 3 teenagers who are. So relax you are fairly normal for your age and there is help for the asking.

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For almost 2 years now i have been suffering with sever abdominal pain and have almost lived in the hospital.The pain can reach the point where i pass out.I hsve had a lot of tests done but none have come back with a proper diagnosis.I have even been psychologically tested on 2 occassions.I have had my appendix out and they found cancer in it but it had not spread and they told me i was depressed which im not.The pain is in my lower right side and out through my back and sometimes in to my rib cage.During the summer my bowels bled severely.I vomit at least 3 times a week and faint at least once.I am so sick of it that i wont go to a hospital anymore.I dont know what to do anymore and I am feeling so ill.Any advice??

Unfortunately I know exactly how you feel as I had a similar situation with a back injury. After visiting a number of local doctors who handed out pills and said it was just a muscle problem my son, a paramedic, said why not try the patient referral line at one of the three hospitals in the area that are part of a teaching school.

We did, by luck of the draw the patient referral person set me up with an appointment with one of the top neurosurgeons in the country. He also was the head of the neurosurgery recovery unit for the hospitals trauma center. I sent him all the medical imaging and information from the doctors I had seen. It took him 5 minutes to diagnose me once we met. My problem was not muscular but skeletal and was not surgically correctable.

He set me up with the hospitals pain management center at their rehabilitation hospital which is also or I should say ranked in the top 5 in the county. It too is a teaching hospital.

If there is a teaching hospital or a medical school, which will have a teaching hospital associated with it, I suggest calling their patient referral line for help. They after speaking with you will set you with an appointment with the proper doctor to do an initial evaluation and if needed refer you to another doctor within the hospital.

What is nice I found about the teaching hospitals is the doctors have to stay ahead of their students for the students are always trying to please and show off to their supervising doctors. The interns, residents and fellows are not looking just for the pickle in the pickle barrel. They want to find a hearing in that pickle barrel. This is how they learn and please their supervising doctors and instructors.

Teaching hospitals are among the best in the country as the doctors and the residents stay on the leading edge of medicine. They will work to find your problem and generally have to most advanced equipment to so with.

If you do not have a teaching hospital near by then you should have a level one trauma center near by. The doctors that staff the trauma center also staff the hospital. Those doctors are among the best in your community. They have to be as they are presented in the trauma unit with some of the worst cases to deal with.

If you cannot get to a teaching hospital then call the referral line for the trauma hospital and let them arrange an appointment with the doctor they believe is best suited to see you initially.

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I go to a uniform school and I want to change my look for next year I like pants but I want to try some skirts and stuff I want acceseries and stuff. I also want to kno were I can get these clothes from in my size cuz I'm tall and slim. (plz name as many stores as possible). Here's the dress code Srry it's long
Pants: Navy or Khaki twill. (stretch or cord fabrics are not allowed) Full length, straight leg only
Unacceptable -- logos; hip huggers/low riders, etc.; pant legs tucked into socks or shoes; rolled up pant legs; cargo pockets; carpenter loops; blue jean look-a-likes with or without rivets; pajamas; denim or stretch or corduroy fabrics. (Rivet -- a silver or copper headed pin or bolt of metal used for uniting the fabric)
Belts: Plain black, brown, navy or khaki with plain buckles and without embellishments or decorations of any kind -- if there are belt loops on the clothing, then belts must be worn.
Walking Shorts/Skorts/Capris: Navy or Khaki twill. (stretch fabrics are not allowed) Knee length or longer (Top of knee) Same style and conditions as listed for pants
Skirts: Navy or Khaki twill. (stretch fabrics are not allowed) Knee length or longer (top of knee)
Same style and conditions as listed for pants.
Shirts: Shirts with collars may be long or short sleeved.
Traditional polo shirts: Button-placket, flat knit fabric (no snaps). If short sleeved, length should cover one-half of the upper arm. Solid colors without trim: True Red, Navy Blue, White, Powder Blue, Dark Green, Light Pink and Toano School Spirit colors of: Royal Blue and Orange.
Shirt color/shade variations are not allowed, for example: wine, maroon, turquoise, salmon, tan, beige, gold, lime, olive, etc.
Oxford cloth dress shirts: button-down collar, white or light blue. Denim is not an approved fabric.
Must be tucked in. If an undershirt is worn, as underwear,
it must be plain white and may not show at the shirtsleeves.
Unacceptable -- logos; monograms; tied up shirtsleeves; tee shirts; ribbed or denim fabrics; capped or cropped sleeves; Johnny collars.
Cardigans/Pullover Sweaters/Sweater Vests: Solid Navy or White only, without trim. Approved uniform shirts must be worn with these items with the collars out.
Sweatshirts: Crewneck sweatshirts and plain hooded sweatshirts that have zippers or are pullovers are allowed in the same colors as polo shirts: True Red, Navy Blue, White, Powder Blue, Dark Green, Light Pink, Royal Blue and Orange. Also allowed are TMS-approved spirit hooded sweatshirts in navy/orange/royal blue. Sweatshirts should fit the child, however, one size increase for growth is permissible.
Approved uniform shirts must be worn with these items with the collars out. No logos
Shirt color/shade variations are not allowed, for example: wine, maroon, turquoise, salmon, tan, beige, gold, lime, olive, etc.
Socks/Tights/Pantyhose: Matching solid colors, White, Navy, Khaki or Beige. Shoes: If shoes have laces, they must be laced up and tied.
Shoes with heels higher than two inches are not allowed.
Sandals and clogs must have a strap.
Flip-flops, bedroom shoes, fuzzy boots or beach sandals are not allowed.
Jewelry and Hair Accessories: Should be modest and not present a potential safety hazard to any student. Heavy chains with or without medallions, spikes, or any jewelry with inappropriate wording are not allowed.

Schools that require a uniform or have a dress code. Do so for reasons different than say the military. Yes they want you to all dress alike but the reason is based in academics not to identify you as part of the group.

In theory it is found that in schools that have a uniform policy or dress code the students perform better academically. The theory is is you take away all other manners of competition the only thing left to compete with is grades.

Schools that have dress codes or uniform policies usually include hair style and length of hair for both boys and girls. The color of nail polish and whether girls may wear stocking, leggings or if socks are required wear as well as the type and color of shoes.

Many codes go so far as to the type of jewelry that can be worn such as the type of watch, necklace and bracelets.

This is all in the name of taking all the dress competition out of the educational equation and forcing competition to be on grades only. It does seem to work as schools with these types of codes are appearing to score higher on standardized testing.

While I know you are not happy to hear what I written your school wants you to stand out academically not as an individual. My suggestion is to adhere to their police and not fight to find away to stand out as an individual. It is for your own best interest to comply rather than to fight.

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He likes to receive oral, and I do it for him every other day because I care about him and want him to feel good. He knows that I love it, but only does it for me 1-2 times every two weeks. He says he doesn't mind it and that it has nothing to do with my hygiene which is immaculate. He always has an excuse, like that he is tired or he is just not in the mood. Yet, he is always up for him getting it or having sex. I feel like there is something he isn't telling me, but whenever I bring it up, he gets angry. What should I do?

One of the most important pieces of advice I give when answering questions concerning sex is that partners have to communicate with each other. when I say communicate I mean talk to each other before hitting the sheets as to what your individual likes and dislikes are. What are definite No's, what are things you might try and how you like to be made love to. Not the first time you have sex together but sometime after if the relationship is going in the direction of a long term affair.

This is especially important for the women to tell the man. Most men learn about sex by reading prono magazines and watching porno movies. Porn movies are made to titillate the audience and are not the way most of us like to make love. As the female you have to teach your man you and maybe he will want to show you what he likes as well.

With oral sex being a big part of your pleasure he needs to be more open with you as to why he is reluctant to please you in this manner. There are any number of reason I could give you as to why he may not like to give you oral pleasure. The biggest one would be failure to please you in this manner.

We men have very fragile egos when it comes to sex we all think we are the worlds greatest lovers and we can be if we allow our lover to show us what they like. This is where a problem exists allowing our lover to show us how to make love to them. TO the male it means failure as a lover.

Playing tit for tat games is not going to solve your problem. Meaning if you don't give me oral sex I won't give you oral sex. This will not resolve the problem. In fact I think it will make it worse.

You two need to have a calm discussion about your sex life. If that is not possible then I suggest you see a sex therapist. A sex therapist is a doctor of psychology who specializes in sexual dysfunctions.

Oral sex can be a big part of a persons sex life. So I understand why you have written to us for advice. I personally don't see giving oral sex as a favor or a duty. To me it is a part of foreplay one my wife and I enjoy.

You now have to decide if you can live with just what he is willing to give, to try and find out his real reason for not enjoying oral sex for you in a one on one discussion, asking him to see a therapist with you to discuss this as some time a professional third party is helpful; or decide if oral sex is that important for you that you wan to remain in this relationship without it.

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I have a huge crush on my attractive female teachers who is like 28 I believe. I am flat out obsessed with this girl I;d say, -I always walk by her room or try to go wherever she is and at the end of the day just to see her leave,.i 'm willing to buy any school related paper and yearbook just to see if any pictures of her are in it, I went searching for her Facebook account, and I found it and I find myself staring at a lot of pictures of her. I get mad just whenever I see another boy go up and talk to my teacher, but the worst thing of all is that she is married and I can't stand that she is. I have feelings of hate towards her husband just because she is married to him and want him to die and I sometimes like to rip papers up or something pretending it is him. Do you think this is a problem I should tell someone about?

You have a huge crush on your teacher. One that is way out of proportion to the norm for crushes. It is not unusual to have a crush on a pretty teacher when your young an going through puberty.

I had a crush on my 8th grade science teacher. In high school every guy in school had it bad for an English teacher who when we were Freshman was a student intern an now was one of our teachers. Now she took care of are ardor for her the old fashion way. She brought her boyfriend, a Marine Gunnery Sargent, to school one day in his dress Blues. Seeing him cooled us all down real fast.

You do need to talk to someone about your fascination with this teacher. You need to speak to a professional counselor as this is something in your personality that you will have to learn to deal with as you grow older. Today it is a teacher. Tomorrow it will be a girl you want as your own. Talk to your parents and ask them to get you some help as this is not just a crush. This is an anger management problem you need to learn to deal with.

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Okay, so I want to be a writer.
I have severe chronic depression... I have several medications for different issues (none of which I take...) but lately I've been getting really bad... So I guess I have to at least go back on one of my medications....
The problem is I FEEL so different on them... No one else can tell, but I can and I hate it. It's worse when I try to write, it's like the pills erase my creativity and my emotions which fuel my work.
So I need help, because I may have my boyfriend make me take my medication daily (because I'm obviously not doing it by myself) so what my issue is is I need help being able to do the only thing I actually feel passionate about, and care about doing, while the pills I have to take restrict my ability to do them...
Please help!! I don't want to choose between my writing and feeling okay... Because I'll probably choose my writing..

Having suffered from clinical depression I think I am slightly qualified to talk to you a little bit about how you are feeling.

Usually for depression the doctors will prescribe an anti depressive medication. They are generally a synthetic replacement for a hormone that is missing or you need more of to help you through your depressive episode. That and therapy with a psychologist is usually all that is needed.

Whit chronic depression besides antidepressants a doctor may add other medications. It are these medications that are making you feel strange. The dosage on these medications could be wrong or they could be the wrong medication for you.

Are you seeing a Board Certified Psychiatrist? IF not you need to find one as a Board Certified Psychiatrist is the best doctor to treat you. If the doctor changes your medication you need to tell him/or her how it is effecting you and how it is making you feel. Medicine is not an exact science, doctors chose medication they know to work for the majority of patients suffering as you are. Nut they will change a medication or medications until the y find the right combination for you.

Being off your medications may make you feel more normal but you are still depressed and to be chronically depressed is dangerous in many different ways. Not only from your own safety but for you financial well being as well for when you go on a high.

You also need to continue with your talk therapy or start talk therapy if you have never had any. The psychologist in therapy will help you deal with the issues you may have with how you are felling while on the medications.

Like I said I suffered clinical depression ans still went through three different medications before one was found that worked well and allowed me to feel more confident and normal. That and talk therapy to find the cause of my depression and work out of my depression.

I realize your depression is chronic or manic and is different than mine. You need to take the medications for your own best interest and safety. You may even have to change doctors to find one you are comfortable with, I did that too. It was my second psychiatrist that found the right medication for me.

Please take your medications and go see your doctor for help on getting the dosages or medications that are right for you.

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