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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!

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So me and my boyfriend have been together long distance for 7 months and he is finally coming in to celebrate my birthday with me. We've been talking about having sex and him figuring me and eating and me giving him a blow job and all that. But my problem is I have discharge. I wear a liner everyday in my underwear but it would be embarrassing to have to say before we do anything, "oh gotta take out my liner and clean". Like I don't know what to do, please give an answer!! Also, I know we are going to kiss, but I've never kissed anyone before... any advice on a first kiss. I'm excited but a little nervous because I've never done it before. PLEASE HELP A SISTER OUT!!! I COULD REALLY USE THIS ADVICE AND HELP!!!!!!!

There is one kind of discharge that is daily and is normal for females. And there is another that is not.
If this is the normal one, you have nothing to worry about. All females come with a natural built in cleaning system, like your very own fragile ecosystem but things can happen to take it out of balance and that is when you have a problem possibly with a bad discharge.
The crusty or gummy residue on panties that is off white or light yellow, is normal.
You have good bacteria inside that kills off the bad bacteria and the fluid of this cleansing is working 24/7, never stops so there will always be residue in pantys and why wearing a panty liner is so great.
If you douche or wash down there with soap, you run a risk of killing off all the good bacteria in which case the bad bacteria takes over.
So if you have any burning or itching, redness, dryness accompanied with a terrible rotten garbage odor or fishy odor you may need to see a Dr to get antibiotics to get back to health.
This kind of thing, like bladder infections can happen to teens girls without ever having sex and is not a indication of whether she has had sex, so if you really do have an infection here, you can tell your mom and have her take you to the Dr. If you don't feel comfortable doing that, go to Planned Parenthood.
You are likely acquainted with what your sweat normally smells like. Females have their own musky scent. Finger yourself before each shower and smell, if its the same scent every day and it's not an infection, then that is your normal scent. Almost all guys love that scent. So you may want to ask him first if he likes it or if he'd rather have you go freshen up, he'll like you know and there's no reason to feel awkward about it. Some days my nose is kinda off and I think I detect an odd odor from me and I ask the husband if he smells something off and would like me to freshen up. He hasn't said yes yet.

My bestfriends bestfriend took me out on a date... We flirted but before that he was calling me perfect trying to get me to go on the date with him trying to tell me he wanted to kiss me and all that stuff...the date was fun.. He tried to take me somewhere expensive but I made him take me to fast food. Then after that we hung out with our friends.. No interaction, but at threnody of the night we went to get gas. He went inside and came back with a soda and have it to me and told me to share with my brother... And I didn't even ask or tell him what my favorite soda was... But he got it... Two days later him and my bestfriend were "fighting" I made them make up and went to mcdonalds..he opened the door to our friends truck so I could get out...that weekend he but his hand on the small of my back... But a week later of barely talking, even though the week before he texted me nonstop. The week later I told him I liked him( which at the beginning of the date I went in not liking him like that) and he said.. You're fun to be around, but idk if I like you... And we left it at that.. Then that weekend he snap chatted me a lot.. And then nothing this week and now he's talking to a new girl now. And I'm over him and today he snapped me... But when I snap him or text him no answer so today i didn't answer...and he's a player...and I know I'm being played but my friends that are his friends too are saying he likes me.. Or so they thought.. Help guys?

Using a cell phone and texting puts a barrier between you, or using the various social sites on the computer(like snap chat) puts a barrier between you, and makes it very hard these days for young people to get to know someone or date. The reason why is because most of their time being interested or pursuing each other or dating, or going together, is time spent apart at the other end of a piece of technology. You are NOT going to find the guy of your dreams that way. When I was your age, I didn't have hardly any dating experience and thought I had an idea of what I wanted. Ended up married at 20 to a man who began to verbally and emotionally abuse me after getting married. My advice, make a list of what you need and want in a guy. Use your mishaps with guys to recognize what the bad traits look right early on and make a list of what you're avoiding. A need is a must have in a guy, like if you want kids some day of your own...yes maybe a long way off, or you love cats or dogs and want a pet if living with a guy someday, if the guy doesnt feel the same way, that would be a deal breaker, meaning, he is not the right guy to pursue, so stop dating or seeing him. A want is something that is not a deal breaker but puts you in tune with what your likes are, what appeals and what you may have in common, If you like ice skating but he doesn't, that isn't a strong enough thing to not consider him as a dating partner. So get in touch with what you are looking for. this guy you mentioned has no clue what he's looking for. Right now, he's like a kid in a candy shop, wanting to try a little of everything out there thats offered. Once you have a better idea what you're looking for, you'll find it easy to tell if the guy who's showing interest in you at the moment might be mature or immature. It doesnt take much time to catch a sign or clue where he's at. Before I met my 2nd husband, I did on line dating and went sometimes on several dates before a guy showed his true colors. Usually always by the 3rd time meeting and spending time together,he will slip up and show or do something that is true to his character. No you can't change a person. So if he's not what you want once you see something that matches whats on your list of what to avoid, leave him. This means having to wade through many false starts. I had just about given up when i met my husband on a dating site. You may only want to have fun for now, but even so, you should be taking notes and updating your list because it will help you in the long run.

well i have this one best friend who doesnt like my other best friend and i dont like my on best friend sometimes but i act like i dont like one best friend when i am around another and vise versa so i need help what should i do i mean it i need help!

If we are talking, teen girls, then a good possibility is that the only reason they don't like each other is due to their hormones running rampant from puberty and that will make girls more irritable at certain situations or people, even to the point of anger for no good reason at all, and can be prone to pick fights.

Don't play games with either of them. You are entitled to like who ever you like, and have your preferences in other things in life, like style of clothes or music, food, etc... without having to pretend to make someone happy. You don't want to fall in the rut of becoming a people pleaser because that is an instant recipe for stress cus there are no two people alike so you would never be able to hang with a group of friends all at once if you were afraid of their reaction. In time these girls will grow up, get past the hormonal thing changing them right now and become normal again. In the mean while, you need to level with them. Tell each girl that you like her for specific reasons, not because one of them is 'better than the other', they are just different and you like each of them for their differences and will not give up either one of them as your friend. So they need to let you need if they are willing to try to get along with each other, or if not, you will see each other singly, one at a time, taking turns spending time with each one without having the other one present. But you will not pretend any longer to not like the other. If they attempt to force you to choose, you will stop associating with them until they grow up, at which time, you'd be glad to pick up your friendship with them again.

The tricky thing about spelling it out like this and giving them both an ultimatum is that there is likelihood of one or both being a stick in the mud and not willing to agree to outline you gave them. This would mean having to walk away from one or both for a while and in our teens, its all about being accepted and liked by people so the great fear of being friendless will cause you to want to cave in and go back to playing their game which is immature. By giving in, you help them remain stuck.
Another option, your mom was once this age and probably remembers having to go through the same stuff. It is something you can talk to her about. She knows you better than any of us here could guess and might have some wonderful advice for you as well.

I just had sex with my boyfriend today on my second day of my period , is there any chance of me geeting pregnant because he only stuck it in a few times and wasnt near squirting not even close to getting there but he stopped because i told him to take it out because i didnt feel comfortable? Please answer my question.... :( im scared

Adviceman covered just about all. I did read somewhere that if you are a teen that there were age limits to purchasing the morning after pill. There are probably several different name brand of the same thing but this article says no age limit on the type called Plan B. Here's article:
http://articles.latimes.com/2013/jun/20/science/la-sci-sn-fda-plan-b-approval-emergency-contraceptive-20130620

Even in a guys pre-cum, (that little bit of cum before sex that beads up on the tip of head of penis) there is live sperm present and it may be enough to get a girl pregnant.

About those 15% who could ovulate at any time...there's another thing to consider . . . almost all teen girls when going through puberty (if you are in this age range you need to know this) will have cycles that do not follow a monthly pattern yet. It is because your body is still getting used to the changes. Periods can be two in a month or none for 2,3 months or just spotting or heavy flow, and range from long lasting up to 2 weeks a couple times for me at 14, to only 2 days. When your period comes with so much irregularity, so will the other parts of your cycle, including when you ovulate. So even if you were trying to follow when you ovulate, it would be impossible until you are older perhaps in your 20's. So best plan is to get a Plan B pill immediately and also make a visit to Planned Parenthood to get on birth control. If you are a teen, they will help you and it is confidential, meaning parents don't need to know. Even if you are college age, still go see them. You want to be covered for birth control and he should be using condoms for sTD protection. You may think this was a one time thing. But if you were willing to try to be sexual with one person, you will certainly find the draw to do so in the future again.

I want to talk with my bf a lot but when i start talking with him i go blank....i decide a lot of topics but its not interesting...

Ask him to go first and ask you a question. Then ask the same question of him. Really listen to what he says. Pick something out of what he says to ask further questions about or make a comment about or share a similar story of your own. People will think you are the best conversationalist if you ask them to talk about their-selves because most people enjoy talking about themselves. Think of the ease with which you share anything with your girlfriends, your exciting news, your hopes and dreams and fears. Someday, in a marriage, you will switch from confiding in a best girlfriend everything, to doing that with the man you married if you married the right guy. It doesn't mean you wont have close girlfriends you share lots with, but a mate is going to be closer to you than any girlfriend could ever be. This is just the practice time of learning how to talk to a guy.

If you are still worried about making a good impression or over think it and think all will be boring, then remember this one motto: "If You Are Not Having Fun, You Are Doing It Wrong".
Also, just be yourself.

And, as a last resort, the uneasiness of drawing a blank will go away if you can find the gut's to admit it in a joking way. Just say, "Hey, you know, I am drawing a blank. I can't think of anything to say next or what to talk with you about right now. Pretty strange coming from a chatty girl, huh? Maybe I am just too mesmerized by your pretty eyes to think straight." The Fear of a long strained silence with nothing to say, will go away, because that's just how it works: When you face your fears (and that means bringing up the issue) the fear goes away. then you'll be able to relax and either sit in silence together and feel comfortable with it, or he will encourage you, thank you for the compliment and pick up conversation himself.

hello iam 24 n wen iam studying my 10 th I have normal breasts but later it became loose n hanging n I got scars even, I donno wats wrong with me they are not stiff n puffy they hang like hell if I wont use proper bra iam a virgin n the aerola is too big n the shape of breast is cone I was depressed with this

Breasts come in all sizes and areola do too. Also, each breast can be different in shape and size from each other. There aren't too many humans who are symetrical on both sides of body. Just sometimes, the difference is easier to spot than on others. I have a link for you to look at. It has nothing but breast shots submitted mostly by young women your age and younger with their comments. Many write a bit about themselves such as having a boyfriend who loves their breasts just as they are. Perhaps seeing that there are other's like you as well as vastly different, you will come to understand you are beautiful just as you are. Here's the link:

http://www.007b.com/breast_gallery.php

Lately i have been getting a reallly weird pain in my stomach area. It is on my lower right side and it is not that painful but it still hurts a bit. Also, the pain comes and goes. I usually get it every 5 or 7 minutes. I am really scared because my first thought was that i have those worms in the liver. However, i have a quite good diet. I don't really exercise but my diet is quite healthy. However, i drink a lot of coke and i have heard some horrible stories about coke piercing your stomach and stuff. Please if you have an idea of what it is or how to stop it tell me!!

tell your parents to take you to Dr. for a check up or if an adult, take yourself. We're always telling people that on here. I know you're hoping to come across someone who's had something that sounds the same and can tell you what it is...but it doesn't work that way. For one thing, there are many illnesses that can have the same symptoms and only one thing that stands out that you might least suspect important info. may be what uncovers what is going on with you. A second thing is that people have different pain tolerance. What is a slight pain to one may be the worst unbearable pain to another and so one can't use how painful it is as a gauge to determine what it is.

Don't listen to you tube video's made to scare you. It's important to care what you put into your body but do the research yourself and if still not sure, check with the local librarian for more info on it.

When I was first married, I worked at a group home with other adult staff there, day shifts, night shifts, etc. After the residents would go to bed, the remaining staff would clean up the house and get things ready for the next day. One particularly rough evening, the residents went to bed late and the other staff (female) and I were finishing up with the chores and I said since I was the one staying for night, I was going to lie down and chill for a bit, she could go and I would do the rest later. We talked for a few minutes, and she asked if I wanted a massage...Obviously that should have been the first red flag. I said sure and laid down on my stomach and she rubbed my neck and back...She asked me if I wanted my legs done and I said sure, whatever. I have had many massages from professional masseuses and thought nothing of it. I sort of fell asleep / drowsed off and when I came to she told me to roll on my back and then she started giving me a blow job. As soon as I realized what was going on, I said, I cant do this, I'm married and I just cant. I stood up and started to walk away, then I didn't. The absurdity of it all, me standing there fully erect with a woman I barely knew, and she was willing to go to town on me, was too surreal, even for a lifetime movie, or perhaps a skinemax late night flick. She kneeled in front of me and started to position herself to go down on me, and I again said look I cant do this. But, I didn't stop her from doing it, I figured she would pull away, but she didn't, and I just froze. To this day, I cant believe I stood there like a statue...I finished in her mouth quicker than I ever have in my life, and then she left, just like nothing had happened. She would later tell me that she had a dream that her and I were going to have sex at work one night, and she was ready to make it happen. Afterwards, I showered, laid on the couch and felt like I was raped. I am the one at fault here, and I get it. I am not or have not ever cheated on anyone I ever dated, and this moment of indiscretion has haunted me forever. I told my wife about the incident a few years later, and it crushed her. She has since forgiven me, but I have never forgiven myself. I don't really know what the question is here for this forum, but I guess I need some advice on getting over this and trying to get on with my life. My wife and I have 4 great kids, and a great family, but every time someone says something about what a great husband I am, I just throw up a little bit in my mouth and think I have been living a lie for so long that I just feel as if anyone knew what I had done, I wouldn't get all of this attention for being who I am not. Thanks in advance. D

It's tricky but my opinion is this wouldn't be considered rape at all. Rape is when one person is benefiting from sex that is non consensual with the other person. With women raped, it's clearly them being overpowered and forced, with a man who is stronger and able to ward off such a thing unless being forced with a deadly weapon or a rape drug, thats another story and would be rape.

As you said, she put out the feelers to see if you were willing, knowing you to be married, by asking if you would like a massage. You accepted, which to her was the first sign that you might welcome this. the second time you gave indication she read that you were willing was when you got up to walk away and then stopped. At any given moment, you had plenty opportunity to escape and didn't. The reason why you didn't is because I believe your mind was in shock! It was so unexpected, that your mind was in shock and unable to think normally. I believe you are a loyal good husband and if you had not been in shock, you would have been able to walk away from it. If you can believe that too, you should be able to forgive yourself. You were a bit naive and gullible too, but now you know better so something like this won't ever have the chance of blind siding you again like that. Now you are prepared. Enjoy life and the lesson you learned.

Hi.. 15F
*̩ know this guy about 5 years now and have a huge crush on him.. He asked me out and ofcourse *̩ said yes.. But *̩ live like 45km outside of town and he wants me to come vissit friday and sleepover .. *̩ realy want to but "̮м̣̣̣̥γ̥"̮ mom won't let me plus its far from home.. Help please?

Another mom here. I would not be okay either with a daughter going to sleep at some guys house or him coming to ours to sleep. Thats one issue your mom will have. Another may be that she doesnt know his parents. He may be a good kid but mom may be a drug addict wasted on the couch all day long while dad works two jobs to make ends up. I gave that example because thats what i discovered when I went to meet the parents of a kid my daughter wanted to spend time at her house.

What I did do, and you might suggest to mom, is telling my daughters, that I preferred if they did not date and do the going steady thing while in high school. But I wouldn't stop it either. Only watch the girls your age and how the dating and breaking up thing is affecting them in school and decide for yourself if thats what you really want to do. I gave them an option for the meanwhile. If there is a guy they liked enough as friends in school and wanted to spend time together with, then he was welcome to come visit at our house during the day. Since he's not in the neighborhood, it may only be weekends.

21/f

The guy I am dating and I have already had a conversation about what we liked in bed. We already discussed what we like most, what we can do to make things better, etc. But there is one thing that made me feel a bit awkward. He sometimes looks into my eyes during intercourse. I don't know why it makes me feel uncomfortable, maybe I'm just not used to it? I hear from a lot of people that guys don't usually do that and I have not ran into anybody who actually did that until now.

Is it normal to feel uncomfortable? Is there a way where I can get over the discomfort?

Anything new to you can be uncomfortable the first couple times simply because you aren't used to it. Same here. I also would have to say that I have found that at times guys will want to watch your face or look into your eyes.
Since eyes are the window to our soul and for many, their relationship may not have developed deep enough yet to be ready to be touched at a soul level, it can feel awkward if you aren't ready to expose that part of you. Sex can touch your heart, your mind or your soul or all 3 as in this beautiful quoted I came across years ago. And it is so true:

Touch a woman’s mind-you get her interest.
Touch a woman’s heart—you get her love.
Touch a woman’s soul; you get passion beyond your wildest dreams.
Touch all three, you have a lover for eternity. (anonymous)

I think it's about you feeling vulnerable in this situation. If he's looking into your eyes, he may be the kind of guy who really cares about how you are feeling and wanting to really please you and love you. Too many young guys are still in the selfish stage, going after what pleases them but not ready to give to a female.
So give yourself time. Open your eyes to look at him for brief bits of time, like 3 seconds, then 5, then ten, and keep adding to it until you can find yourself looking at him. There are a lot of people who never experience sex at the soul level, where there is an exchange of each others energys and the sex is a heightened experience from regular sex. It may be this is what he is hoping to find?

21/f, 28/m

I have been with this guy for 7 months now. I know I must be reading too much into this, but I noticed that he posted on Facebook that a woman older then him, asked him a few questions because he looked so young and was curious as to how he got his job, etc. His friends commented on it saying that he should have asked her out on a date, that she was into him, etc. He liked the comments but said that she was a bit too old and not his type. Which, pretty much made it clear that nobody really knows about me.

I've asked him before if anybody knows that he's seeing me, he said no. He says he's a private person who doesn't talk about himself a lot. A close friend of his knows about me and so does his house mates (my guess is because they see me at their house), but that's about it.

I'm the type of person who tells others if he/she asks if I'm seeing anybody. Which, majority of the time, people do ask. It seems like he's somewhat bothered by it but I don't really understand why.

I know there's a difference between secrecy and privacy, but it makes me curious if he's keeping me a secret and telling other people that he's not seeing anybody when they ask. Am I thinking too much into it or should I just wait for awhile before talking about it with him?

You should have a good talk with him, tho if hes not willing to discuss it at the very least, then leave him. Here's some things about common nature and dating I'd like to share to show you how unnatural he is.

Think about something new you got and you were so excited you could hardly wait to tell your friends about it, maybe an outfit, maybe a raise at work. Something special that comes into a persons life, isn't something they keep quiet about and don't share...that goes against human nature. Some people don't get as boisterously excited but they will tell. And what could be more special in someones life than their new boyfriend/girlfriend? Other than the first couple dates where you might not blab to others in case it doesnt come to anything, most people once they've decided to date the person, make a commitment to date, will share it with others.

Now in order for a person to want to date someone, they need first off to be physically attracted to that person. Then you date to find if there are things deeper than skin level that you are attracted to in that person. He is old enough to be at an age where he might be looking for his long term or life partner. So here's a couple possibilities:
1. Either he likes the companionship of females and or the sex but doesn't want to make any real commitment long term, just get benefits without giving anything to her or
2. Or it may be related to his family either expecting him to not marry beneath his place in society, like if they are rich people, blue-bloods, that sort of thing, or he's see parents divorce and the drama of it and is afraid of making the same wrong choice in a partner, therefore he is gun-shy.

So you need to find out if there is some reason why other than his pitiful excuse.
You are young enough to not have had enough different personal examples in your life of how a guy treats you if they are really into you. Maybe he likes you a little, but so far, it doesnt sound like you are a match in how you think and feel on things and I am sure there are other area's too. What about chemistry? With chemistry, it'll feel as if each of you is the best kisser ever, without it, more like kissing a sibling, someone you care about but don't feel romantic towards. Just caring isn't enough for a healthy relationship so look at this area too for possible clues to another problem with this guy.

You are not overthinking this. Your female intuition has brought this to your attention for a reason. You are intelligent enough to realize it may not be a good idea to over react without having all the information. So ask him to talk with you. After 7 mos. there should be some trust there to confide in you. If he can't, thats another thing to put on your list of what you want to avoid in a guy because you are trying to find the kind of person you want to be with and enjoy to be with long term, maybe even marriage, even if that's in the future yet. Just to go run errands, my husband asks me to go with him because he loves to show me off, no matter if I am dressed nicely or jeans and tee, he is proud to have me as his wife and say's he wants other people to see me with him. I think thats what you;re looking for and this guy is not like that. Besides, a person who wants to show off their partner and be seen with them and introduce them to all friends and family is usually someone who has deep feelings for you or has already fallen in love with you. Good luck dear.

We'll currently I've been using Mary Kay face cleanser but I keep getting blackheads and my acne will calm down and then go back to normal again. I'm thinking of switching to clean and clear but I don't know which products I should get. I'm only 13 and I don't wear any makeup at all. I just want my acne to go away. Clean and clears products have some really good reviews but there are a couple that scare me. I'm also doing sports so I need something to help with the oil from sweat. I wish I new my skin type for sure, but I think I have sensitive combonation skin but I'm not positive :/ But any help would be mouth appreciated!

Some of this is caused by the hormonal changes in your body from puberty. It's a reason why some pregnant women will also have an outbreak of acne while pregnant.

Another reason for acne can be what we eat. A change in diet may help. I can't say what that would mean for you. Just pay attention, keep a journal of what you eat and then when you get an outbreak again, you can track what foods might be responsible. For me, too much chocolate will do it.
I am sure there are some good cleansers for the face out there, but my theory is that of all the ones I ever used, I never found anything that worked like a miracle. So there must be something else missing that the face needs. I have recently come across something on the web that might be the answer to that. It talked about the Lymph system of the body. Lymph nodes are throughout the body in strategic places. Ever been to the doctor when sick and he/she is feeling just under the chin on either side in front of ears. Those are lymph nodes that get overwhelmed at times when the body is busy trying to remove impurities and other unwanted un-needed things from the body. The lymph system reacts well to external massage. This gets the impurities inside to begin moving to pass through this system and be removed from the body. Try daily massaging your scalps and face with finger tips. Do the same for your neck and see if you see a difference in a couple weeks.

I'm a 14 y/o female. I sweat a lot in my underarm area. I sweat there when I'm nervous, mad, hot, scared, ect. Anyway, I feel like I stink a lot. If I wear deodorant, I smell like deodorant. I feel like I still stink when I get out of the shower. I don't eat spicy foods or like garlic or anything; I watch what I eat. But I just feel gross and stinky all the time. What do I do about this? I shower everyday (I wash my hair every other day though, I use a shower cap). I feel like I still have morning breath after I brush my teeth even though I brush every morning thoroughly. I don't know what to do. I don't want to talk to anyone about this at all..

Do you think that it's possible you have an extremely sensitive nose able to pick up the slightest odors that aren't detectable for most humans? My husband is like that. He can pick up on smells I can't. It's easy to find out if this is the case by asking someone you trust, maybe a close girlfriend to tell you if she picks up on any of the odors you believe there to be. I know it's embarrassing but it's the easiest way to find out if others can't smell anything from you, and the sooner you can relax about it.

If there truly is a problem with you having a strong sweat odor then it may be due to bacteria on the skin causing it. Sweat doesn't smell, it's a by product of bacteria in the dead skin layer on your skin. If you remove the dead skin layer, you should pretty much fix the problem. Ever see a bunch of dead skin rub off as you're toweling yourself dry? This is the layer of dead skin on the body that does not come off from just taking a shower. Often it's soaked by shower water but drys again on the body without being removed. It takes some good scrubbing to remove it. Try different bath scrubbers until you find one that works for you. I have not found anything that works for me except the teflon pads for scrubbing teflon pots and pans. this is a very harsh, abrasive item and you can seriously scratch yourself up badly with it, but I use it lightly once a month to remove dead skin and it works better if you've really soaked in a bath tub. Here's a link to info about sweat and odors. The mouth odor is a separate thing, make sure to brush the tongue too as odors can remain there from bacteria as well.
http://bodymint.com/body-odor-what-are-common-body-odor-causes/

Hi everyone! I am 19 years old and need some insight on what i should do about my job that i am currently struggling with. I work in a preschool where they pay me 1000 dollars a month. I know all of the teachers, me and my boss are on good terms, and i have been working there for three months so far, so im familiar to this place. I honestly didnt feel like i was personally getting paid enough, however, i was desperate for a job because where i live it is very difficult to find a job that is willing to pay that much. The thing is, i live pretty far away from this school, and most of my salary goes on transporation. So basically, instead of getting paid 1000 a month, i get paid 600-700. This has been something ive been struggling for quite a while but then I figured that i would mark my territory in this school and that i would be there for a while, and then suddenly, out of the blue, I got a job offer in a school that was willing to pay me 1,500 instead, and it is literally about 2 blocks away from where i live. I honestly dont think i should reject it seeing how I would be getting paid better and have more energy to work because it would be right next to my house. That way i will be able to walk it instead of spending my salary on transportation. Obviously, all fingers point to taking the job. however, i am afraid that if i quit my current job to start a new one, a billion things will happen and ill eventually lose it and end up with nothing. The reason is because I am such a pessimist. When my boss found out about this, she told me she would give me 1300 instead and insisted that i stayed because I know them so well and because the kids are used to me. She also provided me with Bus transporation, but STILL i am not getting paid as much as the new job has to offer. Esepcially because it is so close to my house. Right now I am having a very difficult time deciding what to do. I know these people i work with very well, i am comofortable with the system , but i dont want to be the kind of person that gets too comfortable in a place and ends up going nowhere with her life. I am trying to convince myself that i have to get out there and grab other opporunities that come to me because thats the only way ill ever get anywhere in life but im scared, im terrified of taking a risk. Im terrified of taking a leap of faith and I dont know what to do. Can anyone give me advice about this? has anyone been through choosing an ultimatum before? what did you do and how did you deal with it? All answers are appreciated and thank you for taking the time to read this.

When you are supporting your self, you have to make good solid decisions where the choices are the best for your budget. Winter is almost upon us and in some area, already there. If there was an extended stay of snowy ground, you don't have to worry to to get home with the new offer and you may not make it home at all or find it difficult to make it to work. Unless own a brand new car, once cars are 10 years old or so, parts wear out one by one and you could be putting in alot to keep the car running. My worst year in car care was $4,000. which my mechanic who knew me, gave a cut rate. I could easily have paid out $7,000. in the year. the two following years had at least 2 grand each in repairs. You don't want to be driving a car that is not safe to drive. Gas is another cost. More money, less out pay, means you can even save some money and get ahead, rather than barely make ends meet. You always want to shoot for having that buffer of earnings that are free and clear and don't need to cover any bills so you can have money set aside for savings and/or an emergency.

I have a friedm and she's really cool and all but when ever we talk it's always about some boy she likes and she irritates me because I'm like oh cool( trying to be supportive and all) and she's always like I don't want him to know , but then she'll be I hope he likes me. So I'm sitting here like tf. She always says that boys are looking at her but, at her boobs, and talking to her and stuff like that. And it's not like it's the same boy it's 3 and she claims that many boys "look" at her. How should I tell her that it's annoying as CRAP! Without making her feel slutty or something?

I don't mean to offend but with no ages I can only guess, so from the situation you mention, I can only assume both of you are young teens perhaps even going through, recently through puberty. Two clues:
Girls tend to have one thing on their minds and are desperate to be noticed by a guy and to get a boyfriend. So if she's talking a lot about it, it's probably due to her age. There are exceptions like yourself, and myself at that age but for the most part thats the way it is.
Clue #2: You find yourself very annoyed. Is this the only thing you find annoying you or are there a few other things that annoy you now that didn't before, like a couple years ago. When the hormones of puberty hit and it can last for quite a while after, females who end with too much or too little in hormones will experience problems with their personality and emotions. They become easily irritated, really angry, very weepy and sad all the time, depressed, and personality can totally change.
It takes some getting used to having men ogle you as sexual objects. that's one of the things a female needs to learn how to emotionally deal with. When it happens for the first couple times, lots of girls heads will spin with the new sensations of it and wont be thinking straight. Boys when first hit with hormones have their own problem. As far as sexual arousal, there is a hair trigger that will set them off. A girl doesn't even have to have a big chest, or all they need to do is look at a regular pic of a female. And so they spend a good amount of their puberty in a constant state of arousal, meaning they'd got a hard on more often than not. She may have to learn the hard way, the way most girls do, by getting hearts broken and used by a guy for sex.
If you are a good friend of hers, you might suggest she do some research on relationships, dating, the do's and don'ts and about sexuality, sex, birth control, anything in that arena. And I have a suggestion for you to pass on to her and suggest you read the site too. It's by you tube user Laci Green who covers those issues, is early 20's herself and began to study sexuality searching for answers, back as a teen when she first began her video series. I can guarantee, any subject or question you can come up with, she's got a video covering it and they're only 4-5 minutures long. If you can get your friend watching and learning, perhaps watch some together...she'll hopefully be busier with learning to focus on who looked at her.

https://www.youtube.com/user/lacigreen

I will be 16 in two months, female, and from the US.

So, my friend got a hookah pen yesterday. I am familiar with them and have used them a few times, but I never had any problems after.

All of them that I've tried have been nicotine free, and I did use them only occasionally over the summer and maybe once or twice since then considering I don't own one myself.

But my friends boyfriend got her one for their anniversary and she was really excited about it. This was at about 3:00pm yesterday. I used it probably about 4 times in the next hour(when she left), but I was trying to do tricks. I can't remember for sure, but I don't think my chest hurt then.
My friend came over again around 7:30-8:00ish and she was teaching me some other tricks. I did it a few more times and she left around 9:00.

I don't know when for sure my chest started to hurt. But I really started to notice it last night after she left. It's not so much as it hurts, it's just uncomfortable feeling. Almost like there's a weight on my chest, or something pushing on it. And today at least, I only feel it when I breath deeply or move certain ways.
[I don't know if this could have anything to do with it, but the night before I slept in a really small chair and after I woke up my right foot was half numb for hours after.]

My mom (who doesn't know about the hookah pen) thinks it could be that I caught Pneumonia from my rabbit who died from it a few weeks back. Which I'm honestly worried about since I was cleaning some of his stuff the other day.

I'm not sure... any input would be GREATLY appreciated.

All we can do is guess as you've been doing but I suppose you want solid answers. For that, you'd need to see a Dr. There are many reasons why a person might have the symptoms you have, that have nothing to do with pot or hooka's. When you see the family doctor make sure they've told you your rights under Hippa laws. This means anything you truthfully tell the Dr. about all the things you've done leading up to the problem, including hooka use will be kept confidential so parents won't be told.
Sleeping cramped and badly can tighten certain muscles. Too many curl in their upper body, caving in on and tightening the chest. All can benefit from stretches or yoga that expands the chest muscles. This might bring some relief. But its better to be safe than sorry if you are in the beginning stages of a chest infection, it's that time of year afterall.

I am a teenage female. I have always had severe anxiety.
For some reason, I feel like my dad keeps some sort of camera in my room. He's never given me any reason to think of him like that nor has he been sexual with me, but I just get so paranoid. I feel like there's cameras everywhere - In my vents, the bathroom.. Is this just my anxiety as always? I always look through my air vent to see if there's a camera, same in the bathroom. I'm currently in therapy for my anxiety, so that's why I wonder if it's just my anxiety.

If you are currently in therapy and under Dr.s care, then you need to be telling this to your Doctor. If you need to see your Dr. sooner than scheduled, let the parents know. If you are getting medication and you don't see an improvement in your behavior within a time frame the Dr says it should improve, then let Dr. know with details because the more you tell them the sooner they can find the right medication for you.

so I started a new school and became really close to this guy we later found out we both like each other but I feel like I have to do all the work, organising dates etc... we are now boyfriend and girlfriend and it was going really well but we have only been together for about 3 weeks. the other day we went for dinner and a movie and in the cinema he started touching my leg and gradually stroking up towards my core. we have had a few dirty conversations about what we want to do to each other so I didn't find it weird. I ended up touching his cock and trying to get him off but the movie finished so we decided to go to a park which I found really creepy and it was cold. so I tried to give him a handjob but it was difficult and we were running out of time as our parents were wondering where we were. I offered to suck him and he laid down and came in my mouth a few minutes later which I loved cause he tasted really good. he walked me to my bus stop and we kissed goodbye. since then at school he's been a little distant and weird and not wanting to show any PDA even hugging. has he gone off me?

The only way you can find out what's going on in his mind since you're not a mind reader (make sure you tell him that) is to ask him. Let him know what you are sensing and feeling. Generally, women's intuition is pretty much right on...but in our teens, its still developing and you might be sensing things wrong.
Guys in teens are more interested in playing around sexually, trying to experience sex and find a sex partner. It's normal to want to explore but gals get hurt cus they want love and commitment with it but the guys don't at this age, at least most don't, and they are more into the lust of sex, not the sex that evolves out of love for each other. It could be that he had short term goals of just experiencing a blow job for the first time and he never thought beyond it. So now that he reached his goal, he doesn't have any others for more of the same or a true relationship with the girl who gave it to him.
It's hard to understand the warning signs when we're young cus we're still so new at this/relationships, but you're telling me that you have to do all the work in keeping up contact means that its likely he's not as interested in you as you are in him. Also, you say its been 3 weeks you've been together...and in a way that's almost too short a time to tell what the plus's are here or what the problems might be. I will share a piece off a dating advice post I saved in hopes you may find it helpful.

Why some relationships aren't working in a nut shell:
Some women give their love and devotion to a guy who doesn't deserve it, who is wrong for her
while others no matter how plain and simple the signs are of his love and devotion, they don't see it or trust it because of lack of self confidence. (again, 3 weeks is too soon to be able to tell this but good to know for future)

1 A woman's insecurity and neediness will kill a man's love ( This goes also for initial interest)
Do you love me, do you love me? No matter what he says or does, she never believes him, even if he's never done anything to earn her distrust.She also can't leave him alone and is constantly contacting him 24/7 because she has no life of her own or is trying to make him, her life.
2 It's impossible to love others and be loved by others unless you love yourself first.
Don't look to a man for all your self esteem and self worth. Have it already before relationship..(This one is particularly hard for teens because the majority lack self esteem, always worried about fitting in and being accepted by others .
3. Men do not show love the same way women do. For them it's how they feel when she is around and how she fulfills the dreams of the woman he's wanted and how possessive he feels if another man was paying too much attention to her. Some women translate love into his obsession for her and devotion while men translate her love for him as being appreciated and respected. (So ask yourself, are you giving him respect and telling him what you appreciate about him? Respecting his wishes and any boundaries is important as well as his feelings and emotions, not asking more than the guy is ready or willing to give. The only way you can know is he is ready for something in the relationship is to ask. If the answer is no or not ready, then back off and leave him be.)

So I'm a twelve year old girl and I'm literally in love with Neil Patrick Harris. It's so wrong because he's 41, gay, married, and has two children but I just can't help it. He makes me happy and even though I may never meet him I still love him. Help me get rid of these feelings!

Hon. The feelings you have are real but they need to be put into perspective. At puberty is when girls start noticing males and things they like about them and the same for boys. This is your practice time and learning time regarding dating and relationships. While too young perhaps and parents won't let you date, or too young for sexual with others, even though having a need for release, this is the time when you just start to figure out, how to converse with males, (they think a bit differently than girls but have the same kinds of needs and wants) so learning how to understand them and their priorities is important. Mostly, it is a time at your age to begin watching males of all ages and taking notes on what you like about them. It is also good to take note of bad behavior in guys, learn what it looks like so later when you're older you can avoid those types. It doesnt matter the age of the man, the infatuation, or puppy love, we all get it but never figure out what to do with it. If your girlfriends Dad is seen asking his wife who is seated if he can refill her coffee or tea cup while he's up and you think thats so sweet, make a note of it in a journal. Be specific, break down what it is about the person you experience feelings for. Often it may just be the persons looks at this point. But please consider making a diary/journal of all that happens to you regarding males, between now and when you're in early twenties and you'll have a great list of exactly what you are looking for in a long term relationship partner, or a life long one like marriage. And you won't have to spend too much time wasted in wrong relationships or damaging ones, or hurtful ones because you paid attention when younger and learned. So while it might not be actual true love, the feelings you have are normal but must be directed into something productive as I have suggested.

So me and my ex still like each other but he says he doesn't want to go back out but then he also said we might be going back out next year and I'm so confused on whether I should continue to like him I should just move on to someone else because I feel he thinks im just there like a toy but I'm not and I don't want to say anything because he takes things that include love or anything like that VERY SERIOUS so please tell me what should I do?????!

So basically, you are needing some kind of check list to look at to determine is there's anything worth staying available to him for. I am sure you are looking for something deeper than just a guy who likes you as a friend or social buddy. If its love you're looking for, then I have something I came across on the net some time ago and saved because I found it to be so true and helpful in getting females on the right track in this area. Here it is and hope it helps you.

Why some relationships aren't working in a nut shell:
Some women give their love and devotion to a guy who doesnt deserve it, who is wrong for her
while others no matter how plain and simple the signs are of his love and devotion, they don't see it or trust it because of lack of self confidence.

1 A woman's insecurity and neediness will kill a man's love
Do you love me, do you love me? No matter what he says or does, she never believes him, even if he's never done anything to earn her distrust.
2 It's impossible to love others and be loved by others unless you love yourself first.
Don't look to a man for all your self esteem and self worth. Have it already before relationship.
3. Men do not show love the same way women do. For them it's how they feel when she is around and how she fulfills the dreams of the woman he wants and how possessive he feels if another man was paying too much attention to her. Some women translate love into his obsession for her and devotion while men translate her love for him as being appreciated and respected.

7 Questions to know if he really loves you

1. Does he say I love you. For some, it's a hard thing to say but they show it to you in other ways. When he says “I love you”, he is viewing that as a commitment to you. It is not a flippant phrase.
Saying I love you too early like during first couple dates is a warning about the guy. Its a very good chance he is needy and wanting a woman to be his mom. Other phrases from a guy count too, like you're awesome, I adore you. You're the woman I always dreamed of.
2. Does he make you a priority in his life? Guys have more than one priority...things very important to him but you should be one of top 3.
What he does for you or how he acts can't be faked easily because it's hard to lie with your body. Things he does without having to be asked, making dinner, picking up something for a collection you have, making time for you, even if it's a walk or a long phone chat. If the guy likes you, he'll make time for you at least a quarter of the time.
3 Does he tell friends about you and like to show you off? Have you been introduced to his family and friends? If he keeps you separate, he's hiding something or ashamed or fearful of something
4. Does he care about your pleasure during sex? Is he only into seeking his own pleasure or your's too. Does he open his eyes and want to have both your eyes connect while making love?
5. Does he respect and encourage you? Respect means, does he value your opinion, do you share decisions and treats you as a partner. Are you encouraged by him to have your own friends and hobbies outside the relationship and encourage you to seek your dreams and uphold you in that.
Jealousy is not love, it's control. It's okay to be protective, but jealousy shouldn't be what prompts the protectiveness
6. Do your friends and family like how he treats you? Others make a great gauge for judging a guys character.
7. Does he look at you with lust and passion in his eyes, with a hunger and thirst for you? Does he give you admiring looks, does he still want to sneak peeks down your shirt. What he sees is Very important since guys are visually stimulated. If he isn't looking anymore, he has lost his interest. All men because of this natural trait, will also view other women but do so discreetly, without being an ass about it. Don't expect a man to look at only you. If he doesn't look at other women at all, it may be a sign that he is gay. You do want a man who is visually stimulated by women.

How many points are true for you with your guy?
7 true He treats you as a Queen and he is an exceptional man
5-6 true He loves you. Just don't focus on what is lacking.
3-4 true He loves you enough to make the relationship work for him. If it's enough for you, then be content. If you feel like you're settling for less, let him go and look for something better.
1-2 true He's a douche-bag, a user or controller. Leave immediately.

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