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Q: This weekend i am going to stay at my boyfriends moms house. i meet her once before. she didnt seem to like me to much. but i only meet her for a few minutes. i have talked to her online once. She told my boyfriend she wants to meet me so were going there for the weekend. i am about 5 1/2 months pregnant with my boyfriends baby. which makes me more nervous.

Don't take her disapproval or disappointment over the pregnancy out of wedlock personally. It is a situation that she will have to adjust to and look beyond to give you a chance. Give her time, and show her that you are committed to being a respected part of her family. She will most likely be overjoyed with the baby and more open once you give birth and she sees you as a mother and not a girl her son knocked up. Are you planning on marriage? Are you over 18yrs. old? If not, things will be more difficult for you and you will need all the support you can get. This weekend is a perfect opportunity to show her that you are a kind and mature woman, so even if she provokes you, stay calm and polite. Good luck.

Q: I really think I am the only person in this world who is being in this position. I love my woman and I am so willing to spend every second of my life with her. The problem is that she moved away for a month and made it clear to me that it is all over. I love children I would love to make her tons of children, I am always thinking how beautifull she is and how beautifull would our children be. She has the most beautifull eyes in the world.
So anyways, I was very patient, made many sacrifices for her, did not cheat on her, did not even find another girl for a while because I had hopes that we will be back together one day and I did not want to give bad charma to it.
I tried to convince myself to move on but just could not, i had to wait for her. I had all this feelings that I am just not good enough so after she found another man... I started meeting so many new girls. I was dating all the time every night with a different girl for 2 months. Many girls a day. I was so high when I was with my girl and I just had to get there again, find another girl that will make me fly again. Of course most of them dates would lead to sex.
I got a new girl now, she is really good and cute and I got strong feelings for her. She is pregnant. Also 2 of the other girls are pregnant, I was seeing them for over a week each, this girl I have now wehave been together for about a month.
I know I still love my ex but I think it is about time to realise that we will never ever be together again. I am also a very wealthy man, and about those 2 other wimen I am scared that they are gold diggers. They must have messed up with the condoms cause I always use one unless I really know the girl and have been with her for a long time. I dont want no babies and I am in a really really ackward position.
I am cob in one of the biggest hospitals where I am from if you know what I got in mind. Should I tell everything to my ex and see what happens? should I use a tactic to win her back, should I focus on the girl I got now? I am not going to raise 3 babies from 3 different wimen. I am always carefull and I never wanted to put myself in such a place.

You wanted to fly high..are you high now? It is time to stop looking back and start looking at the present and preparing for your possible future. Though I have strong doubts that you used condoms and that you are wealthy, you do have a responsibility to three women now and it is THEIR choice and not yours, whether or not to complete pregnancy and bear your children. We have all been dumped or left or something like that, but it is never an excuse to throw your life into total chaos of one night stands, and I don't care if you dated them a week, they were still all thrills without frills. Telling everything to your ex? How do you envision it? "Hey baby I never stopped loving and thinking about you, despite the fact I got three different women pregnant and had unprotected sex many times and may be infected with sexually transmitted diseases." You only have one choice, my friend. Reality Check!!! Keep a good paying job, you may need to support 1-3 children by law. Go to a doctor and get tested for all sexually transmitted diseases. They are rampant these days, and many are treatable. You never wanted to be in this situation, but that is exactly where your own actions have put you, and you must take responsibility. Hiding from the truth never works. Working with the truth always helps. I really wish you the best of luck, and hope that you will be man enough to do the right thing by the women you took to bed, and the unborn children that you have created with them.
Making the best of your present situation and stepping up to your responsibilities will start to fill that empty place in you with a fresh sense of self-esteem and lead you to become a better man.

Q: I am 20 years old an i am engaged to my wounderful boyfriend of 2 years..i recelty found out that this month he has been poking holes the size of tumb tacks in our condums.. i was woundering if there was a chance i am now pregnant...and what should i do..he dose not know that i found out???? i want kids i am just scared that we are not ready

That is a extremely selfish, manipulative and dangerous man you are engaged to. After you break up with him, get yourself checked out for not only pregnancy, but stds from your doctor. This is not something you should forgive and forget, but take as a sign to run, before he ends up ruining and controlling your whole life.

Q: My bf is the owner and chef of a small cafe in town. I've been hearing stories from two of the waitresses that work for him that he is a complete jerk to work for. One of them told me that once he threw something and yelled "how many times do I have to show you"! He will scream and holler at them in front of all the customers if they screw up an order when it's busy. One time I went in to talk to one of the waitresses and he yelled "no talking while your working"! I was so embarrassed for her that I left. I heard he also said once "I would fire you if I wasnt' friends with you" to another worker. My concern is if he has this much anger at his work that he could turn it on me. Should I get out?

Yes. If you were my friend, I would tell you to be very careful if you choose to continue with a guy this volatile, so my advice is the same for you. He needs counseling and a few chill pills..metaphorically speaking, because he is not only going to drive his employees and customers away, he is going to drive himself into a heart attack. When you leave him, do so in a safe place with many witnesses. He could turn on you.

Q: this is what my boyfriend just sent to me.. heres the convo between me and him..

i\'m sorry its sooo long but please read because im soo desperate!!

him: ive been thinking alot.......ive been unhappy you have been unhappy....im done being shit one in this relationship and done being taken for granted.....it just seems every time we see each other or talk were fighting and i dont want to be misrable any more you really have no idea what you have until its gone.if you keep doing what you are doing to me we are not going to last...if you do your not only gunna lose me but lose any chance of being friend after also.what im trying to say is....i think we need to take a break and see how muchi really mean to.i love you and this hurts but i cant keep hurting.

me: wow.. you f****ng liar. you dont love me.. annnd you broke every f****ing promise.. you get what u want.. and you'll see what u had.. key word. had

ok blah blah blah and then we decided we\'re still together and then he kept trying to hurt me by saying its all my fault and he wishes he could just forget me and my name and all that sh*t. but i kept saying like \"whatever happens happens and if we\'re meant to be together we\'ll be together and that he has his own opinion.\" so then he said well\" im so done with you\" and he doesnt know if he wants to ever get back with me

sooo my 2 questions are!!

1) what should i do? like what should i say and act around him.
2) how can i get over him and make it seem like im not hurt and how can i change.. i have an attitude, im clingy, and im jealous..

please help!!

I am so happy that you are taking some responsibility in this break-up and see some areas that you can improve on for the future. Having that positive attitude will help you in your dating for years to come. Sounds like your guy was sick of the fighting and jeolousy most likely. Guys hate being attacked on a regular basis and will give up a girlfriend when she becomes a clingy nag. I don't know the whole problem with the attitude, but it probably has something to do with your frustration in not being heard and understood. This is definately not your fault entirely. Every relationship has challenges because nobody is perfect, but we all want a perfect partner. Mostly guys are not as invested as the girls and will not want to endure heavy relationship garbage that the girls want to work on endlessly. If you want to try to get back with this guy, first you have to give him space. Next, you have to commit yourself to not reacting to everything as you did before. You can have feelings that are similar, but it is important that you are calm and not hostile in your verbal dialogue with him. For now, keep your dignity and don't be a typical mad ex-girlfriend. Be nice and polite, but maintain a good distance until he seeks you out. If you are really done with him, still be kind, because other guys are watching you, too!

Q: I just got back together with my ex. He's the only guy I've ever loved & we have so many memories together. The problem is, he's not acting the way he did before when he was my boyfriend. Our relationship back then was the kind people are jealous of, but now it seems like he doesn't want it to be as serious. He barely calls and comes to see me, but I stand my ground and act like I don't care. He's the one that was begging for me back! I don't even know if I call this a relationship, but I want to confront him & ask what's going on. How should I go about doing this? (18/f)

Is he trying to be distant to be in control of the relationship? Maybe this is his way of saying he is insecure about getting back with you. Did you break it off or did he the first time? Are you allowing yourself to be just a booty call? I don't think that standing your ground includes acting like you don't care, when you really do. That is not going to get you anywhere. Talk to him about your feelings, and if he is a jerk about it, then this could have been a mistake.

Q: I'm 14 and I've been with my boyfriend for four years now. I know I'm not ready for sex and he supports that, but I'd like to know some alternatives for sex.

Oh there are soooo many awesome alternatives...swimming, reading, monopoly, biking, bowling, movies, lunch, video games, ice-cream, dancing, hiking, reading each other love poems, working for charity, homework, studying for exams, discussing politics and religion, football, music, archery, motorcycling, sledding...etc. Oh, did you mean like physically sexually stimulating stuff? For him that would be breathing, guys are pretty much always stimulated by a girl that is alive. For you, a romantic novel or fairy tale type movie in which a young man is actually capable of a loving selfless relationship and is not just in it for the sex. If you don't want to have sex, then don't even go down the path of foreplay, which comes before sex...get it? Before, like in preparation for sex, because it will always eventually lead to sex, which is what all guys know and which is why he seems so understanding about you going as far as you want to go, "without going all the way." The guy knows that you will go a little farther each time until you do have sex. By the way, four years is really really long and unbelievable! It does not give you any more reason to do anything with him though whether or not you were with him since four years ago or since birth. You are only 14, which seems a lot compared to the fact that you were in kindergartin less than a decade ago, but when you are eighteen, I guarantee you will think that you were only a wee infantile child at 14, and are so glad you did not start spreading your legs and risking pregancy and stds that could ruin your life.

Q: I'm 14 and I've been with my boyfriend since I was in 5th grade. They used to think that our relationship was cute, but now they're both annoyed and scared. They're annoyed because they didn't think I would end up really liking him and that I'm too young to have a boyfriend. They're scared because they think that I'm going to do something with him that I'll regret, but I know what's right and what's wrong. And they always tell me how responsable I am and that I've got a good head on my shoulders, but they don't seem to want to get to know him or talk to him. Am I in the wrong or should my parents try to get to know him?

Why do you want them to get to know him better? It won't change their minds about you being too young for a serious relationship or for being too young to tie yourself down to just one guy and be missing out on dating fun with other guys or just putting off all that adult crap until you are older. You are still their little precious girl no matter what and no one will ever be good enough for you. They love you and will never be ready for you to grow up. You will grow up despite their lack of permission, and you will date many wonderful and horrible and wonderfully horrible men with or without their consent and make all your own decisions in life eventually. There may even come a time when you will understand why they were so silly, when you have your own kid. For now, continue to be a great kid, who is lucky to have great parents and a cute boyfriend, one of many that will come in and out of your life. They don't want to buy into your seriousness about this guy or to have you think they approve of your seriousness over anyone at your age, so don't bug them about it. Your pretty lucky you are allowed to date at all, so keep it "cute" for your parents, before they change their minds about you getting to date altogether!

Q: Ok. Well i have recently started hang out with this guy...and i like him alot. Well he has told me many times that im fucking hot and how much he likes me. But when people ask were always like were just friends...Im kind of wondering why he hasnt asked me out yet...and if i should just ask him out...i would definitely prefer him to ask me out..but im thinkin he either doesnt want to go out with me for some reason or he is just afraid of rejection...what do you think?

He might think lots of girls are ummm what you said. It does not mean he wants to date or commit to you exclusively. He could very well be afraid of rejection, too. Ask him out if you want to, unless you are also afraid of rejection. By the way no one likes rejection, but it is a risk we all have to take, unless we want to be weenies for life and let others control our destiny.

Q: Well recently i went to this church event and this guy in my youth group was talking to me a whole lot the entire night. Im not able to go to youth group every wednesday night because of work but when i do get the chance to go he is always like heyy i havent seen you in forever how have you been?! At this event he came and sat right next to me and started to talk to me. Or i was sitting down and he was standing behind me and he like leaned his head over and was like heyyy.

Now yes it hasnt been long since i started to like him kinda.Maybe like 2weeks.

Now heres the problem hes 15and a sophmore in highschool and Ill be 18 this week and a senior in highschool.

Its not an actually question but i need some advice on what you think i should do.

Thanks

And dont judge be about the age difference.

Updated***
Just covering all the bases, but I am glad to hear it!
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You say that "the problem hes 15and a sophmore in highschool and Ill be 18 this week and a senior in highschool." What is the problem YOU see with the age difference? I am not sure what you are asking advice on exactly, since you did not specify anything except that there is an age "problem" that no one is supposed to "judge." So, what I think, is that you already see the obvious problems with the age difference, but want to be told that it is fine for a legal adult to pursue a relationship with a fifteen year old boy, despite the fact that a sexual relationship could get you in legal trouble. My advice is to wait a few years until he is 18 and you are 21...oh no, then you will be out with the drinking crowd and he will feel left out again, or you will slip him some booze and get into legal trouble for that. You see, besides maturity and different schools and interests etc...there are too many problems with an age difference until you are much older. You will be happier in the short and long term in dating young men your own age.

Q: Well I am 15 and in highschool. I've been with my boyfriend a little over 7 months. In the way beginning when we first met... we had minni crushes on eachother...and when we were about to get closer a girl got in between and he liked her... that didn't work out so it was about us again. Then another girl came in between and he actually went out with her. When that didn't work out it was about us again. I don't know why i kept going back to him but it ended up with us going out. I felt like a rebound for the longest time but i just really liked him. Now he tells me how he can never be attracted to anyone and he truly loves me. He thinks we will actually get married and what not. I on the other hand don't think so we are only in highschool. I'm just confused about this whole thing...Was I sprt of a rebound? Also I read his texts once in awhile when i know i shouldnt but hes always texting girls... and he goes far away on church retreats and camp and what not and i fear that girls are all over him. He talks good to these girls like he misses them and what not. Whats going on here in our relationship?

You are a smart girl, but we all have our weaknesses. He has been your weakness and that is why you keep taking him back. He is obviously fickle, but that does not mean you have to break up with him. As long as you are happy with the relationship as it is, then stay together. If it is going to drive you more crazy than anything else, then think about breaking it off. I sure would not believe anything he says about the long term, even if he were sincere, because as you know, it is not realistic. Don't treat him or the relationship like it is all you have, and you will be okay no matter how it goes. You are cool with or without him, so take it one day at a time.

Q: my parents having been like a couple foir the best year. My mom told me once that she was thinking of making him leave. but never went through with it. then she told me again and this time she would alywas get mad at my dad. && im thinking she might acualy get a divorce this time. my mom doesnt have a lot of money and i dont think that we could survive on our own w/o my dad. but i dont want to tell her that. And also i was looking through her cell phone once and i looked at her text messages and there was one that said some "nasty" stuff to someone named mark....not my dad....so i have a feeling shes cheating ??? And of course i dont want to tell her that either. && i just wwant my parents to be more of a couple. Is there anything i can do?

You can talk to your mom, and you can talk to your dad. Tell them everything that you are afraid of and everything you are feeling. Write it all down at least and give it to them. It is not in your power or your responsibility to fix their adult relationship or keep everything together. You have a right to express yourself fully to your parents and if they don't listen, find a teacher, adult family member, counselor or trusted adult at your church if you go. Don't judge your mom for the message, you don't know the whole story, so don't go down that road. Your parents should not put you in the middle and they don't have to explain themselves in detail, but you do have a right to a secure home, so talk to them about making that happen.

Q: I'm a teenage . Recently I have discovered that life isn't worth living unless you have love in your life. By love, I mean a significant other. I'm an artistic type of person who actually NEEDS a significant other to complete them. I'm dying without love, and since last week I have turned to alcohol to solve my problems. I have WAY TOO MUCH stress from school and work (i'm a stage actress so work for me is rehearsal) and dance classes. When I feel depressed and suicidal and I can't take this world anymore- I drink red wine. It's a bottle that I have taken from my parents. I only drink 2-3 SIPS (not DRINKS) every day... But today I had double that amount because I felt crappy from my hangover.

I feel like an alcoholic because I can't function if I haven't had my alcohol. I need to know if I've become an alcoholic or not.

And how can I survive without love? My libido is so high I could die. And ion isn't enough for me anymore. Oh, and don't tell me that "the time will come" or anything like that, or that "I'm too young". Because I'm not. I'm mature enough physically and emotionally to handle a serious relationship with another human being.

I am friendless and sick of being shunned by everyone I know.

I don't believe in God. I'm an atheist but i was raised a catholic.

Part of immaturity is wanting what you want right now. We all have to endure the stress and pain of waiting for good things or the work and effort of making them happen. The reason you are so desperate for a significant other is that you are incredibly lonely and overstressed. You have already learned that alcohol is a temporary fix, that leads to more emptiness and crappy hangovers. You need to find a safe place and someone to listen to you. Alcohol is not that place and does not care about you. No one thrives without love, but no one feels loved all the time, even WITH the love of their life. If you were mature enough to handle a serious relationship, then you would not be desperate for one. It is a pity that when we are so in need, we are the least likely to get what we want. The hole you feel cannot be filled with another human being, but you still have the false hope it can, because you are inexperienced. If you learn to give yourself the love, respect and attention that you deserve, then you will truly be prepared and open to a serious relationship and a healthy one at that. Two broken clingy souls will often try to consume one another in an attempt at some wholeness, but quickly discover that two halves do not a whole make. Love is not math, it is magic. Love does not make sense and we cannot grasp it...that is why it is so rarely realized and too often misunderstood or overgeneralized by romantic media. Love will not be attracted to you until you love yourself first. A light can pierce the darkness, but can never fill it. Light has to radiate from within you. Don't confuse the hormonal needs of the libido with true love. If you just want to get off, you don't need a lover...so learn to umm...love yourself in that area, too. You are not too young, to have great needs and feelings, just know that you will not be destroyed by your angst and frustration. You have the power to take control of all areas of your life. Start tuning in to your own voice instead of drowning it out with drink. Start expressing yourself in all areas of your life and be heard!!!

Q: ok so i have been going out wiht my new girlfriend for about 2 mouths now and i want to know a couple of things
1. on avrage how long do people wait to have sex
2. should we celabrit things like 1 mouth annaverys and if we do, how long do we do that untill it's to only a one year annavery?
3. she's a little new at haveing a boyfriend, she is my forth girlfriend, and i just want to know is there a way to make her more confuable with being around me, she already really cares about me and trust me,

There is no average, that I am aware of or that matters. Sex is up to the two consenting adults. Basically if you want it now, you have to wait until she wants it as much as you do. This may be never, so if this is all you want from the relationship or a deal-breaker, better to find out now. You should celebrate whatever and whenever you want to. Again, it is not romantic to go by an exact formula, but I don't know of any girls that ever got mad over a thoughtful gift or gesture. If you want her to stay comfortable around you, than don't do anything to rush her or pressure her. You need to let her set the speed of the physical relationship to what she wants. Communication is craved by the female gender, so open up and talk to her. Ask her what she thinks is romantic, what her favorite love movie is and why and find out what makes her heart skip a beat. Every girl is different in exactly what she expects and wants, so don't rely on too many stereotypes, find out from her what her individual preferences are and she will appreciate the time and care you take in getting to really know her.

Q: How do i know if I'm a lesbian? i have a really close friend who's a lesbian, and I know she likes me because she kissed me one. Then I kinda freaked out because I was so sure I couldn't be a lesbian. But now my boyfriend and I broke up and I'm really attracted to her. Like, I am a slut, I'll admit it, but lately i am not into the guys. They are so boring. Maybe I'm just looking for something new and different? All i know for sure is that lately I suddenly get the urges to do sexual things to my friend. grab her boobs, touch her pussy, whatever. So, I guess I'm a lesbian. I just don't seem to like guys anymore much, if at all.

Have you always questioned your sexuality? Felt more attracted to girls than boys? Or is this latest fascination something that was aroused by the kiss and curiosity? Sexuality is only a part but a huge part of being human. It is impossible to separate our feelings about ourselves from our sexuality and as you examine yourself, it is natural to examine all areas of your humanity. These sites can offer support in your quest.

http://www.ehow.com/how_16939_know-gay.html

http://www.wikihow.com/Figure-Out-Your-Sexual-Orientation

Q: I dont really want to believe to that thing, but I cant help it due to things that have happened to me. Once I had this dream I just could not wake up from. The dream just kept on going on and on, and it was not a good one either. I knew it was a dream, I knew who I was and I was wondering to myself, what, am I doing here. This is not real then why the fuck cant I wake up.
Anyways, after a while I did wake up. drunk some water got back to bed. Only then, everytime I fell asleep, I got the worst feeling one could ever get.
There I was, trying to fall asleep, when everything around me started colliding, like not just the walls around me, but the hole universe was being destroyed into atoms, as if I was waking up from the Matrix or something. I had no control of my body at that time. Took me a couple of seconds till I obtain control again. It just kept on for the hole night and everytime I did, I just tried to move my fingers. After a while, I could.
Next day I asked not only one but two doctors and none of them new anything about it.I was very concerned about it and I thought I was having some kind of epilepsy seizure during night. Everything turned out normal according to the doctors. Told me that I was nervous or something so they both send me home.
I cant remembered how many times it happend after but then I found this guy who told me about astral projection. I almost cried as he was mentioning all of the effects and symptoms and he informed me that people who have mastered this skillas he called it, can do many things such as see pictures from far far away. Especially when he told me the soul leaves the body part, I totally freaked out. I really did not want it to happen again, only months later, it did. I kind of wanted it to happen, but everytime it started, it scared me and of course I tried to move my finger.
After, a couple of weird stuff started to happen. I had this dream where I was rotaing above my couch for a long long time, above the ground. Dont know, might be a dream, might not, I might be crazy I might be lying I dont want to argue for that. Anyways, if it was a dream, what stupid dream that was. I was there for hours goind in circles I could not control, untill I finally open my eyes and faced my pillow. Anyways, the point is that the hole vibrating, electricity effect did not happen.
This other time, I tried to fall asleep and it started happening. For once I did not care. I was not scared, and while it was happening I though that, now it is time for me to do it, if it can be done. So, how do I travel through real space as a soul, how do I remember them when I wake up, I mean the soul has a different perception from the brain, it uses no eyes, no ears no touch. Suddenly I started thinking of al this stuff while it was there happening. I really did feel like I made a thoudand thoughs in a second, I felt lucid and smart and then decided to go see that friend of mine and then it happened. There I was looking at him from above, he was all dressed up in green, studying, he was bold and I hadn t seen him for a long time. Not really long time, but when I met him he had hair. I woke up.
Later that night I called him and we hanged out. I told him I saw him at the morning. He asked me if I passed by his university where he studies and I told him, well...short of. He WAS bold by the way. And he did admit he was all dressed up in green.
After that I had a couple of really crazy experiences but know it does not happen anymore. I dont really care, I tried to for a while, not really that hard but anyways. I need to ask

Do you people believe in Astral Projection? Can you share any experiences? It does not come against Christianity since Christian religion believes in the existance of soul. I really feel that there is something that I have to do but I just cant remember, do you believe you can communicate with the dead? From what I understand in the movie Butterfly effect with Ashton Cutcher, he could travel through times. Others believe that you can do pretty much anything you want, even be at multiple places at the same time or even be everywhere at the same time, something like god.
I believe that everyone experiences that Astral projection, but few remember since when you wake up in your brain it is hard to translate you soul senses in your brain senses. I believe in spirit-brain way of though, soul-cant define it and body-mostly used. You got 2 types of dreams, brain dreams and soul dreams. Brain dreams are illusion that occur while the brain is shutting off. Soul dreams are what the brain remembers from its lets say adventures in the ...universe or....whatever.
Is this dangerous? Lets say, you might meet other creatures there besides human beings and iguanas travelling through the...universe, whatever...Lets say that maybe, something else might take your place in your body, like a dead person or something even worst.

I never slept over than 7 hours during at night except sometimes, I always remembered my dreams, dreams so long you will not believe them, I have a great memory, I really remember stuff you would not believe me if I told you how far my memory goes and I am not crazy, I know how to distinguish when my mind is fooling me or plays tricks on me. I never was the type of guy who chases the paranormal and I dont believe in many stuff. This just happened and it really is a life changing experience. I do feel as a differnet person after that.
My mother was about to have an operation once. HER mother was passed away long time ago before my mother needed to go in the hospital for some surgery. A couple of night ago while she was sleeping she had this dreamwhere she was in the surgery with all this people around and there was her mother smileying at her. When she did go there in real life, the room was exactly the same, and the doctors to. She knew the doctor who would operate on her but she did not know all of the people that were going to be in the room, and she had seen them before in her dream. It was as if her mother was telling her, that she still exists somewhere.

These sort of unexplainable events and more have happened to people I have known (some college professors) and myself at times that were signifigant. I can't offer an explanation, but I believe that we are all connected with the universe and one another on some unseen level. Religion is the human attempt to explain and trivialize the unexplainable with limited rational. Power exists beyond our reason and understanding and for some reason we are allowed insights at moments in our life that are personal gifts from this universal unseen power. You can call it whatever you wish, but it is beyond our definitions. Accept the gifts when they come and take them for what they are.

Q: Is it wrong to go for my ex-boyfriends cousin? They're actually step cousins but also very close. My boyfriend and I broke up awhile ago (it was a serious relationship) and he always thought I liked his cousin. I admit I had an innocent crush but now, I've started to have major feelings. What should I do, because I don't want my ex to think I'm easy or I lied to him about it. (18/f)

Maybe it was self-denial more than lying. Is there a chance the cousin returns your affections? Even if he thinks you are cute, he may not want to put his friendship in jeopardy to go for it. Your ex will think whatever he wants to, so don't worry over that. I would talk to the guy you like in private and tell him that you DID have a crush on him, but did not want to hurt your ex. Just see what happens. If you get rejected, you still can walk away with dignity.

Q: Okay, so there is this guy who i have gone out with unofficially about four times (video games and movies at his house and cooked him dinner at my house and drank with him and his friends at their house) and on one date with him(movie). He is an ex-coworker. He is not my type and i am way cuter than him but i decided to give him a chance, i have been lonely lately. Well, yesterday we went out I gave him a blow job and he came after like two minutes :( and that was it. NO ME. OH, and a few days before i told him he can be my mr. right now (didn't tell him this but it is because he is not my type at all). Now I want more, i like him. He is like no other, but he won't answer my phone calls today. So initially i was trying to manipulate him i guess, now is he trying to get back at me? I don't want to play games anymore, how do I get his heart? Or after what I did do you think it is impossible? It is so not like me to do that so soon into things, but I did. And now what do I do? I need some guy opinions here, please....

Love is partent, fear is desperate. This is what confuses me, "and a few days before i told him he can be my mr. right now (didn't tell him this but it is because he is not my type at all)." At least you admit that you were trying to manipulate him. You suspect that he is avoiding you already just to get back at you? You really do expect that he should be immediately whipped and at your beck and call just because you are cuter than him? I would not suggest starting a relationship with anyone you start out thinking is above or below you in any way. It is egotistical sounding at best, but I think that closer to the truth, it is a cover for you own deep insecurities with men. You purposely go after someone you think is not worthy of you, in case it does not work out and so that there is less chance of him rejecting you. Now your true self is showing more in your desperation to get this guy whom you previously judged as undeserving of you. Why play games in the first place? You clearly have set up a number of defenses in order to protect a fragile self-esteem. Until you deal with those issues, my dear, you will never be satisfied or happy in love. A man cannot give us ourself, it is not his capability or job and one or both of you will end up in resentment for it. Look deep within and heal yourself, before you seek another. Then, you will act out of love and not fear.

Q: I had quite a sexually active life when I was younger. I broke my virginity at 13 and went on humping anyone I could get my hands on.(Of course, I only have sexual relations with women of my liking. This is not shallow hal here.)
Anyways, the problem came about a few months ago when I finally settled down and got myself into a serious relationship. At first, the sex was its usual. Then, after a few months, I didn't want to do it anymore. I can't seem to get it up for her. I try to avoid sex and it's seems kinda depressing. But here's the thing. I can get it up for any other chick, not for her. -___-
In short, I dont want to break up with her, I just don't want to have sex with her.

Updated***
Of course it is easier said than done; everything worth having is worth working for. You could throw in the towel and continue living for the thrill of the catch as some suggest, or you could take the challenge and learn something more about yourself. It is not just about this relationship, it is about knowing if you are going to let your immature libido control you, or if you can harness in that powerful force to work for you. It is not about giving up so much as it is about not giving up. Even if she is not the "one," if you throw in the towel, you will be more afraid to get into another relationship, because the threat of impotency in commitment will haunt you and control your decisions. I want better for you and so do you. Try to take the challenge while you still have something to try for.
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What does it mean that you "can get it up for any other chick?" Does that mean you are having sex with other women or does that mean that you are masterbating to images/magazines/fantasy? There is a difference between the two that is pretty major. It is important that you realize that even if you can function physically, that the inability to be aroused sexually in her presence does not have anything to do with her attractiveness or your desire to stay with her, and you need to reassure her of this. If this is your first long term or serious relationship, then you may be for the first time going through a process that is called reality. The relationship is not new and exciting in the unknown romantic ideal sort of way. You need to focus back onto the relationship and not seek sexual stimulation or satisfaction elsewhere, even materbation, if you want your girl to start becoming your lover again. You are used to moving fast and not staying with one person long past the newness stage, and just like a remote control junkie, you become numb to what really turns you on and addicted to the change itself. In order to discover your excitement with her again, you need to re-train yourself and have some discipline. It does not sound fun at first, but it will drive you wild with desire for the love of your life, because all the energy you are giving away elsewhere will be stored up only for her. You need to stick to this for a while, but it will bring results. A long term relationship is not only healthy, but more sexually satisfying with a loving partner, than jumping in and out of bed with multiple partners. Instead of avoiding sex and concentrating on your problem, be there for her sexually and commit to refocusing all your energy and sexual tension onto only her.

Q: okay well I'm 14 and i've been talking to this kid, hes 18 but we go to school together and have a class together. we hang out a lot and like just kiss and at the most make-out. well we both admitted to eachother that we both like eachother very much. but the only problem is, is that he thinks im too young. like hes scared that if people found out or something or if we dated he would get in trouble. i've told him it was no big deal but he thinks it is. i really like him and want to be with him but that's the problem. i dont know what to say or do to make him realize he wont get in trouble or anything. please helpp.

He is not a "kid" legally and has some reason to be concerned. First, there is the legal ramifications for being sexually involved with a minor. Second, he knows how different a 14yr. old is from an 18yr. old, and he may feel guilty for taking advantage of you. You may be more than willing, but the age difference is a big deal until you are BOTH adults. If you want to continue the relationship, my advice is to protect both yourself and him, by limiting the sexual activity, especially avoiding intercourse. A relationship with this age difference will have its challenges because, he will be graduating and perhaps moving on with his life, while you are still in high school with kids your own age. If having dates to school dances and with guys who you will get to see at school is important to you, then you may want to consider breaking it off with him when he graduates.

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All our motivations stem from two: Love or Fear. When in turmoil or indecision, ask yourself from which of these you are acting. If you want an honest response outside of yourself, you need to first be honest within yourself. Bless you on your journey!