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Hi there ladies or gentlemen i need some serious help and talking to, so if you have to you can be as harsh as you need to because i need some sense knocked into my head asap! i'm a 19 year old young lady and me and my boyfriend have been together for a while, but regardless of how long we have been together i should not be thinking about having a child at age 19! This is just ridiculous and insane that i'm thinking like this. I'm very smart and i know the consequences and what it takes to care for an actual baby. i take my birth control pills faithfully so i'm in no way trying to get pregnant or even risk pregnancy. i think this came out of nowhere because a few of my friends just had their baby and one of my friends are pregnant i'm just like wow; in disbelief that my friends are having babies at such young ages and they're not even done with school o.O As i scroll through facebook i see cute baby pictures and statuses saying how they love being a mom, and how the feeling of being a mom is incredible. Having a baby sounds nice, i'm the oldest in my family and i want to be the first one to give my mom her first grandchild; but of course i want to do it the RIGHT way. finish school with a bachelors in nursing i might go for masters, spoil myself with the money i make do what i want like travel and experience cool stuff whether it's before i get married or after. THEN think about having a child. but i cant get it off my mind right now is the only problem, i hate thinking about this. i hate it!

You're both too young and despite if you agree with needing to be married or not, there have been studies shown that babies born out of wedlock are more likely to live in high poverty.

Plus, you two have only been together for a year. I won't lie, that's not a long time. People these days are getting married way too quickly, one year is hardly long enough to get married, plus have a baby.

Just remember you're right with everything you believe in. Keep taking your birthcontrol, you both have education ahead of you. If you are perusing college or in college, you wont be able to continue to do college, work, and raise a child, and if you do you will have to compromise a lot of things in your life.

It's better to have a baby when you're financially and emotionally ready.
I don't know if you are but I can only assume since you're 19 that you couldn't possibly be.

I don't mean this in a mean way either,
so many of my peers have got pregnant and I'm 21 and a senior in college -- I don't think any of them planned it and despite the out come of having a child and loving it, you want to be able to give your child the BEST life you can, so I personally think that means going to school, getting an education and being able to support your child when the time is right :)

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I have a boyfriend i have been with for a year and he has always been controlling. I am at the point were i cant take him telling me what i can and cannot do. I have told people about him and all of them have said get out now he is going to become abusive. I believe them because there have been times where he gets so angry that he is about to punch me but ends up not doing it. I am so sick of all the pointless pain. I am trying to get out now but he keeps saying i will change i cant live without you. I can't get out someone help. Please :(

Leave. It's UP to YOU. Get out break it off with him, block him on all social websites, block him on your cellphone, block him on everything and if you still feel concerned about your safety after you break up with him get a restraining order.

Go with a friend when you break up with him, don't go alone if you're concerned for your well being.

People that are abusive will always say they're going to change but they won't.

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Okay so this guy is really showing he is intrested in me. He walks me to classes and is always telling me that im preety and stuff like that.. Im a 15year old girl and Honestly i dont want a boyfriend. Im not into the whole relationship thing.To tell you the truth it kind of scares me.. I like being single. Dont get me wrong, this guy is actually super nice and a gentleman but i dont want him to be anything more than a friend. How do i tell him im not intrested in the nicest way possible? Im a person who doesn't like hurting others so i really need help on how to tell him that im not the person that likes all that Relationship stuff. Im too young for that. Please help thanks (:

There really isn't a nice way of doing this, you just do it. It'll hurt him either way and things might be awkward for a while but the best way to do it is nicely. These situations are really complicated because it's awkward and uncomfortable,I would just sit him down and maybe say "Hey, I don't want you to get the wrong idea or anything but I really just want to be friends"
He might be upset for a bit,but just give him time.

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my 11 year old niece says that her 12 year old boyfriend raped another girl while they were dating and i am trying to get her to tell someone but she says she does not want to be a snitch and i think she is to young to have a boyfriend but her mom does not want to listen to me and this girl she told me about has started her period when when she was 10 what should I do? I can't go to the school because the girl does not go to my niece's school i am afraid the girl could be pregnant at 11 years old and that is a scary thought please help.

You HAVE to report this. You're an adult I'm assuming, or at least older than her and since you are aware of this it's your responsibility to tell someone and get her help!

You need to explain to your niece the dangers of STDs, STIs, and Pregnancy!

Explain that he could be hurting other girls too. Either way you need to find the school, contact the school counselor and the police, because this is unacceptable.

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I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years and we are very in love with each other but it's def been a rocky relationship.We broke up 2 months ago for a month and decided to get back together bc we love each other too much. Everything was really good, the best its ever been actually... but then two weeks ago he started acting distant. On weekends he would just go with his guys and during the week he wanted space. I confronted him yesterday and asked what was going on. He said he wants space from me for a week and that he has a lot of tests to study for and things to take care of. So I tried to be understanding but yet today (when he was supposed to be so busy) he studied a little then went out with his friends. I just wonder if thats right that he needs space from me but none from his friends even tho he spend more time with them. It hurts and I confronted him about it and he was a complete a hole to me. He's gone thru this phase many times before but not since we've gotten back together. I personally don't think its right and somethings going on. What do you think? Is this normal?

Girl -- I agree, I don't think it's right at all. :( You two have been together for a long time, the fact that he's not talking to you and treating you like that.

I mean I know couples go through up and down phases and bad times that you work through, but if you broke up before and he didn't realize how much he needs you and isn't taking your relationship more seriously - you have to realize if you want to do this with him anymore?

It's hard to say why boys want space. I think we'll never know the answer :/ but if he does go to jail/prison for drugs I would definitley break it off. That in itself is not healthy for you or your relationship. He probably knows he's doing something bad and shady and wants to avoid you because of it right?

sorry if that wasn't too helpful love, hope you can figure things out

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I am a 15 year old girl. I cheated on my boyfriend, told him, he broke up with me. i am still in love with him, and its been 2 months all i want is to get him back. I have no clue what to do or say, everything fall apart he left. Don't me tell i should move on cause i'm young, and i have my whole life ahead of me because i'm of hearing that, it doesn't fix anything.

Yeah it doesn't fix anything but it's the correct answer. You may rate me low if you want, but honestly -- you're 15 years old. You're in HS and I'm not sure how to put it any nicer, but LIFE goes on.

You also cheated on him -- so him breaking up with you is something he obviously chose he is NOT going to tolerate.

It's been two months and if he's clearly moving on with his life and doing fine, you need to be doing the same thing.

Sorry if this isn't what you want to hear -- but some things shouldn't be fixed and in a few years you'll look back and realize it.

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OK, so my boyfriend and I had sex last monday. I have been thinking that I may be pregnant (I'm 18)but my parents don't like my boyfriend. I am determined to tell them if I am pregnant that it was with my boyfriend ( of which they don't know about nor do they like). How can I go about telling them if i am pregnant that I am pregnant without them yelling at me or freaking out?

First of all -- don't tell them you are pregnant until you are ABSOLUTELY SURE.

It's just going to fuel drama with your family if you're not even sure.

You have to remember to put yourself in your parents shoes! If they don't like your boyfriend they probably have good reason. Parents can see things we don't see when were younger.

Regardless, take a pregnancy test to find out if you are. So -- if you are, when you tell your parents, try to tell them both together and sit calm in the living room. Be prepared for them to yell and scream and be angry, you can't really stop that from happening.

Maybe they'll surprise you and be accepting?
Just give them time to handle and process the information.

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hi 19/f...does weight loss capsules really work.
is it like a meal replacer or can you still eat your regular meals and is it dangerous to your body??????

No, most of them do not work. They are filled with harmful things in them that can damage your liver, your heart, etc your body.

Meal replacements in the form of a pill is not good nor healthy. If you were going to replace a meal, I'd replace it with a rich in fiber protein shake or something like that.

But Yes, most diet pills are harmful to your body.

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Recently got engaged. I'm the biggest I've ever been, and now I've came to conclusion that I want to lose weight. I have the motivation and deterimation to do it! I'm 19 years old,
and my doctor has me on a weight loss pill called Phenotomine; it curves appetite.

I have a membership to the YMCA; and I was wondering,

would doing Zumba Tuesdays&Thursdays && water aerobics Monday's & Fridays--with relaxtion with swimming, hot tub, and a sona- on Wednesday be a good plan to go with to lose weight? I don't want to do hardcore work outs because my fat will turn into muscle and I won't see any results except toner.


I'm not going to eat past 7, and as my body gets use to it, I'm cutting it down to 6. Bad or Good idea?


You guys have any other ideas? Thanks in advance.

Hi love,

I think doing those exercises would be defintiley helpful.

Though -- if you are trying to lose weight and burn fat, cardio is what you need to do.

I would get into cycling classes, using the elliptical, running around the track, and lifting small weights (burns calories faster and increases metabolism)


Although with all that you are doing, you NEED to remember that what you EAT, diet is very important too. If you work out all the time and don't change your diet, you will not make progress.

You should start by writing down your intake for a few days then going back and seeing what you can change or exchange for something healthier. I would look online for healthy meal plans.

Diet and exercise will def help you lose weight :) Good luck!

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My boyfriend of four years and I broke up about a month ago and within a week I met another guy. He was older, a grad student on exchange from Europe. Since I studied abroad last year, we had a lot in common and hit it off right away. We ended up seeing each other the next night and he stayed over at my house. We did not have sex or anything and I was honest with him, telling him that although I was technically completely single, I wasn't ruling out getting back together with my boyfriend. Less than a week later we did get back together and I cancelled on a date with the other guy who was very supportive and happy for me. I know I made the right decision getting back with my boyfriend because I do love him and things have been difficult because we have been long distance for over a year now, but sometimes I wonder if I missed out on a new and exciting experience. I just am not convinced that it would have been worth throwing away what I have. Did I do te right thing?

You answered your own question, you said you love your boyfriend and despite it being hard with long distance you love him. So ..that's you're own decision, if you had slept with the other guy, I mean you and your boyfriend were broken up but how would you have felt and how would your boyfriend have felt when he found out??

I think you did make the right choice, but if you're also having second guesses like this, that's an answer and something to think about :/

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Hi. I am about to go crazy because my mom just won't listen to me. She thinks that my hair is too ugly and she wants me to wear clip in extensions. My boyfriend has told me not to. He likes to run his fingers through my hair. He hates them. My mom won't let me leave the house without them and she says too bad for him. Obviously, I'm angry. Before putting them on, she teases my hair so I can't take them off because after she teases it, it WILL look bad! Yet, it's embarrassing when I'm getting it on and he's like "what is this?" and one day he's gonna stay with a strand in his hand. Help! Btw, I'm 21

Honey, you're 21! Legally she can't control you. You need to stand up for yourself (I know it may be hard) and I don't know the situation or how your mother is. Though, she can't tell you how to look! Tell her it is YOUR life and YOUR hair and you will look the way you want to. I mean the only thing I can see as an option is not letting her touch your hair or you. Is it possible to move out if shes troubling you this much? I mean you are 21. :/

Sorry if this isn't too helpful, I really don't see a lot that can be done, except you physically not letting her touch your hair L/

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I am 14 and like my stepbrother who is 16. I've known him for a year and has begun to have feelings for him now. I do not live together with him but on holidays I go to my dad and I live in the same apartment as he. I also have a big sister who is 16 and I get jealous of her when he even talks to her or laughing together. How can I tell if he likes me? We usually have fun together but my sister is often with us. He is sometimes touching my hair and pull his fingers through it. he always tickle me in the waist so I laugh and he is much stronger than me, though he is quite narrow, and he used to challenge me to get past him. Does he like me as a step-sister or friend, or more than that?

I'm going to say he likes you as a step-sister. And I agree with the comment below, he is your STEP-BROTHER, maybe not blood, but still family. Personally I find it disgusting.

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Okay, I'm really freaked out. I've always had irregular periods where I would skip months at a time without one. BUT I got my last period JULY 21st- 25th. And today I think I am getting my period again and it's only AUGUST EIGHTH!!!! ?????? What's going on?!?!?! Is this possible.

As long as you haven't been having sex, there is no need to worry. A lot of girls have irregular periods due to stress or a lot of things that happen in life.

I had a very irregular period before I got on the pill, if you're not happy with how irregular you are I would suggest talking to your doctor and getting on the pill to regulate your period.
Mine is like clock work now and it helps with acne too and PMS.

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What does it feel like to have your period and have sex? or is that even possible? and would guys like that?

It's kinda gross. Maybe towards the end of your period ... when it's almost over and it's a barely there flow -- but, from experience (gross I know) it's too wet.

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About 4 weeks ago i was diagnosed with bacterial vaginosis and put on antibiotics to treat it. I am also very sexually active but have only had one partner. I was finished with the antibiotics a couple weeks ago and about one week ago i started using rephresh to balance my ph balance. Its not a douche or anything and is completely safe but today i noticed a thick clumpy white discharge. There is no itching or odor, so i didnt think it was a yeast infection. Im going to the doctor in a few weeks, but does anyone have an idea as to what could be causing this?

I am prone to BV, my gyno told me that I don't have to take antibiotics each time to treat it. See, once you get BV you are more prone to continue to get it... it can be a hassle. Unless your symptoms are super strong and may disturb your everyday life, you don't have to take the antibiotic. Each time you get your period the bacteria down there, get's cleaned out and it basically does it on its own. The medication for BV doesn't necessarily work, it can cause yeast infections.

When you take that antibiotic it kills off the over growth of bad bacteria (the BV) and it kills off too much, forcing more bacteria to regrow but it ends up growing too much and essentially you get BV again.

*This is all from what my gyno has told me & she has been correct. Unless something seriously is wrong -- you should ask your doctor again?

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I had sex on the eighteenth of June, and we used protection. My period has been weird lately, the last time I had it was on the sixth of June, and I expected it to come today or yesterday. Is it normal for it to be irregular after sex or am I just paranoid about getting pregnant?

You know, I think you're fine -- as long as the condom didn't break you really shouldn't be pregnant, unless there was some tiny hole in the condom, although that's unlikely. It's pretty normal to be irregular, if your period has always been irregular. Mine used to be SO irregular before I got on birth control. I would go like 39,40,45+ days between my periods, it would freak me out. But I was always fine! After sex, if you're worried about getting pregnant, that can cause your period to be late. I wouldn't worry about it, if you don't get it soon take a pregnancy test and ease your mind :)

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Okay,
so last month in april i missed my period nd then this month i was two weekes late. i assumed i was pregnate i have three childern already nd then i got this brownish blood could it be my cycle was changeing or i jus have sex so much i missed it last month idk im really confused on wat could be going on should i jump nd call a docter or should i jus wait nd see?

If you think you're pregnant, which it sounds like you are -- especially since you have three children. I would assume you'd know what it feels like to be pregnant, have the same signs ... take a pregnancy test and you will know, don't just guess and fret about it. Once you know, you can go on from there.

So.. if I wasn't clear, I suggest you take a pregnancy test, if it's positive go see your doctor and she'll help you further, like with your last children.

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So I if you haven't read any of my other questions about this guy, I will fill you in. I've been talking to this guy. He's funny and extremely sweet. He is about three years older than me, and I am sixteen, but he has this level of sillyness and quirky disposition that I possess as well. Since he has a fun, playful, childish attitude like me, I feel like we connect. He is very protective of me and I find it cute. He told me he likes me a lot and I do too!


but every time he is annoyed or pissed about something, he closes me out. I know I should give him space when cheering him up is out of my control, but I feel like crying when he shuts me out. For instance, he was supposed to go to Arizona today but his flight got cancelled. I try to cheer him up and look at the bright side but he gets all negative and bitchy and I don't like him taking out his problems on me. HOWEVER, he DID admit he is being mean when I told him I'll let him be. He said he was sorry he was acting like such a crabass, and I felt relief to know he's mature to admit his wrongdoings. Still, I am cautious. I feel like if we ever were more than what we are now, his tendency to become pissed easily and take it out on me will effect us in the future. Advice?

Hey... I know how this goes. I know you two aren't dating, from what you've said. Just talking, not exclusive yet. But, guys will be like that. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost a year now, and I've learned that some people just handle stress and disappointment a different way.

When my boyfriend and I fight, or he's upset about something, the BEST thing to do is let him have his space, him "shutting you out" is his way of dealing with his space. It's hard to say about how things would be in the future, I mean clearly he will still probably be like this, if this is the way he deals with his problems.

It's not that he's taking his problems out on you, most guys ask for space so they don't get mean and rude, and say things they dont mean. I feel girls get what they deserve when they keep pushing and prying a guy for information on whats wrong. The guy gets mad and says things he doesn't want to. The best way to avoid that is to let him be until he's cooled off enough to talk to you.

It's good he admits he treats you bad when he's upset, but also I think that would be avoided if you gave him his space during that time too right?

I'm a junior in college and my boyfriend just graduated college. It's a live and learn process.
You're still really young and it's just all about learning.

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that's what my friends call blood clot. because it looks like strawberry jam. no, but seriously i get it sometimes. but how is it caused and why? does it have anything to do with using tampons ('cause i use them-)? i am 13, usually every time i bleed i get that strawberry jam. is this normal?

Yes it's normal. Very normal. Just your bodys way of getting it out.

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i just got my tragus pierced, and I want to make sure it heals right and quickly. what is the best thing to use to clean it & how often should i?

My friend got her tragus pierced too and it takes a LONG time to heal. She got hers in november, and it's still not healed. The best way to keep it clean is to use non-scented foam soap, make sure you wash it everyday, you can use saline solution also to clean it, (they gave that to my friend), using warm sea salt water on it is also really good for it and to help prevent infection. (Dissolve sea solt into warm water and soak on your piercing and then rinse it off) do this every night, it should really help reduce swelling too and make it feel better if it hurts. I'm sure you've already been made aware of this but dont use rubbing alcohol on it, because it will dry it out... but yeah :) good luck! xoxo

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