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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
14/f
Earlier in the month I started to have my period, but it stopped/slowed down sooner than normal. Soon after I discovered that I could only pee a little at a time, after the small amount it hurt slightly but I felt like I really had to go. I'm going to tell my parents of course, but does anyone know what it might be? Thank you
Telling your parents is the best thing to do as you need to see a doctor.None of us are doctors and of course not being a doctor we can't make a diagnoses.
The most likely problem for a women is a UTI, which is most commonly corrected with medication. There is one other possible cause, although very remote given your age, which is something is blocking your urethra not allowing you to pass urine. Most common blockage is a kidney stone.
Here again I am not a doctor and it takes a doctor with laboratory testing to make these diagnoses. The sooner you see a doctor the sooner you can be examined and a determination made as to what your problem is and treatment started.
My advise is: Tell you mom/dad immediately what you experiencing and let them get you to a doctor. A gynecologist is preferable but your family doctor will be good too.
Hello, I am 18 years old and have graduated highschool.
I am a virgin still. And am dating this guy for 3 months now. My question is, is it too soon to be fingered/hand job in your opinion. I have done this before but with a guy I was in a relationship with for a year. I want to do it, I mean it's not like im going to have sex or go further but i also sort of feel a tad sad for my mom because we are so close and i feel she would be dissapointed in me. :/
Listen to DangerNerds advise, it is the best of all advise that has been given so far. Then go to the following link:
http://www.pamf.org/teen/sex/virginity/readyornot.html.
This link is all about first time sex and things you should know, questions you should ask yourself as well as other useful information.
While you may not be planning to have sex at this time, you do have a question on, "My question is, is it too soon to be fingered/hand job in your opinion". Fingering/hand job is a first step in a sexual relationships and in time will lead to having sex.
The link I supplied is one I found when we received questions concerning sex for the first time. I believe even though you are not planning on having sex at this time you would do well to review it now so you are prepared and have you questions answered for when you are ready.
Is there something wrong with me?
I cant stay still for long (about 10-15 mins) before I have to change position and ill start movin my feet around or somethin. Especially in school when im in my lessons. Ill be sat there and ill just start moving my legs and feet and ill be messing with my hands or somethin, I get really uncomfortable. I also find it really hard to concentrate. I try telling myself that Ill concentrate this lesson, we get ten minutes in and im daydreaming. I tune out and when I come back to earth i wont've heard a word the teacher said. I also get bored really easily and this is also a slight problem in my relationship. I feel really selfish because I wont be able to keep makin out or anything because Ill get bored if its not got my excited or got me really into it. If I am at home and told to do somethin Ill try to put it off, Im a very disorganized person and Im hopeless for planning in advance. I also get naffed off about things easily but I can keep that in my head and ill get upset over tiny little things or whatever. If im not doin somethin I like ill just get bored and not want to do it or ill get distracted and do something else which will lead me to getting told off. I really do try to concentrate on things but it just feels boring unless im doing something I like to do. I know I probably just sound like any average teen but I look around and everyone else is managing to keep up. Ill end up tryin to talk to a friend when they are busy or working which will again get me told off. Im also really loud and I don't even notice, ive been told that im being to loud when im talkin when i get really into it and i dont even notice how loud im being, ill also end up annoying people without me realising. Ive also been told im childish and to grow-up but i cant, i really cant help it.
Sorry this question was so long. But I just want to know what might be wrong with me..
Thanks,
F/15
I'm one of the older advisers on this site and hopefully I can be of some help.
First a question. Are your parents aware of all of this? If not you need to tell them.
None of us are doctors and even if we were we could not offer a diagnoses.
From what you have written it sounds like you need to be evaluated for ADHD; Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. The following link will tell you more about the symptoms of ADHD.
http://www.webmd.com/add-adhd/guide/adhd-teens
There is a lot of information on the web as to the causes, effects and treatment of ADHD. You and your parents should do some research and be informed about ADHD and the treatments available before your visit with the doctor.
There are several very good medications available for use in treating ADHD. Which one is going to be right for your needs should be discussed with your doctor. You may even have to try one or more different medications to find the one that works best for you. The key is for you to be open and honest with the doctor as to how the medication is working and any side effects it may be causing.
As to being diagnosed as having ADHD is not the taboo subject it once was. Depending on which study or who you talk to the causes differ somewhat. More people suffer in different degrees from ADHD than was recognized not to long ago. When I was your age, back when dinosaurs roamed the earth, doctors said we had ants in are pants, we were day dreamers or just lazy and left it at that. People with this disorder are far luckier today as this is a treatable disorder.
im 17/f and i wanna know how can i tell if i have breast cancer? ive looked it up on the internet and im still not understanding how do i check? i checked this morning and i couldve sworn i felt a large bump under my skin, im not sure and i dont wanna worry my mom or doctor. i just need to know how what to feel for and where to feel for it. thanks
If you found a lump in your breast you need to have it checked by a doctor. You cannot tell if it is cancer just by feel.
Just prior to Christmas of 2009 my wife found a small lump on her breast. She didn't tell me and she was going to ignore it. Fortunately she had a scheduled doctors appointment coming up and while there told are primary care doctor about the lump.
Our doctor immediately sent my wife for a mammogram the results of which were the lump was consistent with a tumor. My wife was then sent to a surgeon who ordered and MRI and then a biopsy. The MRI found a second lump hiding behind a milk duct. The biopsy was positive for cancer.
My wife decided on a mastectomy with reconstructive surgery. My wife was very lucky; the cancer was found early, it had not spread and it was not an aggressive type of cancer. Her only therapy is one pill a day for 5 years.
My wife is a breast cancer survivor and is cancer free. Her one year check up was excellent. All of her doctors are extremely happy with her results as am I.
Am I trying to scare you? Yes and No. When I was your age, I'm now 64, my neighbor who was 17 found a lump in her breast. It turned out to be benign. The only thing that ever happened after finding the lump and I'm not sure this had anything to do with the lump is; Before she married and had a child she was a 34DD after having the baby she became and stayed a 34C.
I given you two stories; one serious and one serious with a somewhat comical ending. Fact of the matter is you cannot self diagnose this issue. You need to have it checked out by a doctor and have it properly diagnosed. One word of caution; do not let the doctor say you are to young to worry about this or its probably nothing, lets wait an see if it grows or goes away. Insist on a mammogram and let a radiologist make the call as to if it is a tumor or a cyst.
The following link has more information. Please look at this website for more information.
http://ww5.komen.org/breastcancer/earlydetectionampscreening.html
in 6th and 7th grade this guy would follow me home and stand out side my house it turns out he goes to my school so i told the principle and she didn't do anything but she told me that he was bipolar and that he would eventually stop it kinda did but now when im walking my dog i always always see him and in the hallways he gives me this creepy smirk and watches me all the time what should i do i know she said it would stop but its been 3 darn years and its fudging scary
I am one of the older advisers on this site. Hopefully you will find my advise helpful.
The fact that this young man is bipolar does not mean he is not dangerous or is not unaware of what he is doing. Both your parents and his parents need to be made aware of what is happening. Your parents need to know so they can protect you. His parents need to know to so they can make sure he is compliant with his medication and that he is not a danger to you, anyone else or himself.
What you need to do is tell your parents what he is doing. Being in 7th grade his age would be somewhere between 12 and 14 years old. Depending on his age he may be old enough to meet the legal definition of stalking in some states.
My advice is to suggest to your parents that they should consult with local law enforcement as to how to handle this. For one thing the principal released medical information to you she may not have had the right to do so. Here again depending on his age he may have the right to medical confidentiality and she may not have had the right to tell you he is bipolar.
By allowing local law enforcement to handle this; you and your parents are only involved in that which is directly involving you. The release of medical information is something altogether different which you and your parents do not need to be involved in. That is between the boys parents and the principal.
I've been sick with a cold and my voice has been gone for 3 days now, I try not to talk but I have to at school and stuff. What can I do to get it back? Its driving me crazy!!
Loosing your voice for three or more days tells me this is more than a simple viral infection. You need to see your doctor or one of the Mediclinics. You might have some type of bacterial infection which requires an antibiotic to knock it out.
Warm liquids such as clear soups and tea may help sooth your throat until you see the doctor and the medicine kicks in.
I had a uti last weekend and I had a high fever Sunday and Monday. Monday I went to the dr's and the dr said that i had a sinus infection on top of it. she told me that my uti medication will take care of all infection. So i kept taking my uti medicine, it worked for my uti but not my sinus infection. i woke up wednesday morning with big puffy eyes. my mom thought it was an allergic reaction to my medicine, so we swicthed to augmentum ( real sinus antibiotic). nothing has gone away and it is now tuesday. almost a week later. my forehead is sore and my eyes are constantly swollen. is this a bad sign? how do i get rid of it? m parents are convinced that its allergies but i am 16 years old and i've lived through 16 allergy season's and not ONCE has this happened to me. I'm tired ALL the time and my throat hurts very badly. I have phlegm in my throat constantly and my gums are red. my lower back hurts randomly and i have constant vaginal discharge. I have no fever, though. Does anyone know what's going on? What does it look like to you? Do you think I will be ok?
OH! BTW! Can somebody pleaaaase find me a way to stop my eyes from welling when i wake up. I always look awful for school and my prom is this weekend!/:
You need to go back to the doctor. Question when you switched to augmentin was it by Dr.'s orders or was this something mom had around the house?
Two things about antibiotics; If you are having an allergic reaction to a medication it is very important to contact your doctor and inform your doctor that this is happening. None of us, even parents unless they themselves are doctors, have the training to decided if the problem is the medication or an infection resistant to a particular antibiotic.
When taking antibiotics, unless told otherwise by your doctor, you need to finish taking the medication as directed even if you are feeling better. Not completing a course of antibiotics is how infections become immune to antibiotics. You may feel better and your body may be at a point where it can by itself fight off the infection. The infection has not been eradicated by the medication as the course of medication has not been completed so it mutates and becomes resistant to a particular antibiotic.
Pollen counts are unusually high this year in certain parts of the country. This has caused allergic reactions in people who have never suffered before. I'm not saying you are suffering allergy's only your doctor can truly say for sure if you have finally fallen victim to the dreaded hay fever season.
Given everything you have written my best advise is to back to your doctor.
My mom gets really angry really easily. I'm her only daughter and i'm 16 and she treats me like i'm disposable.
Like today she found out that I missed school because the power went out and screwed up my alarm clock last night.
I told her what happened and she refused to believe me and made up all sorts of crazy delusions in her head about what she thinks really happened. She started screaming and cussing me out and telling me that she's going to call social services and have them come take me away because she hates me so much and that she thinks i'm a complete failure.
Every time anything go's the least bit wrong she go's nuts. She makes up scenarios in her head that never actually happened and lets them build her anger up.
Every single day she explodes about something and always takes it out on me.
She thinks she's the perfect parent though and whenever shes around anybody else she acts positively angelic.
I'm always being accused of something and I never get a say in the matter. If I try to explain myself she slaps me and tells me to shut up.
Yet she'll go on an on about how I abuse her trust and how she's the perfect parent and that I don't deserve her.
I really think she hates me.
She always insults me and belittles everything I do. Nothing is ever good enough for her and every day I come home from school to a pissed off mother who stresses me out the point i've thought about calling DCF.
She's even gotten angry to the point she pushed me down the stairs and hit me with a pan.
I'm in all honors classes with A's and B's and i've never been to the discipline office for anything.
I don't know why she thinks i'm such a horrible monster but she does and it drives me crazy.
What can I do about her?
I can't live with my dad because he lives in a really tiny 1 bedroom apartment with 13 cats and a 12 hour job. He barely has enough money for himself and his pets so he wouldn't be able to take care of me.
I'm not going to be judgemental, I can't be as I am not there. What I don't like in what you have written is the slapping and the fact that as you have written;"She's even gotten angry to the point she pushed me down the stairs and hit me with a pan."
The slapping, and I am assuming it is across the face, and the pushing you down the stairs. Is to me child abuse. While you could go to DCF yourself I do not suggest it.
What I do suggest is that you talk with a trusted teacher, your guidance counselor or school principal. Once you tell them what is happening at home, specifically the slapping and pushing you down the stairs, they are requires by law to follow certain guidelines to see that you are not in jeopardy.
You will most likely be asked a lot of question some of which I believe would be: When did this start, when did these things happen, how long has this been going on and questions like this. Answer them truthfully and to the best of your knowledge or remembrance.
If mom is suffering from depression or some other illness Social Services will try to help her as well as to protect you. This why it is important to be as truthful as you can be in answering there questions. If you don't know the answer, don't make one up. Simply tell them you can't remember or you don't know. Some questions they ask do not have a right or wrong answer.
I love my husband to death but we have not been getting along i know that i can be picky sometimes but what woman is not. So my husband made a promise to me that he would not smoke anymore so when he asked yesterday i immediatly said no and of course he got mad. So today he tells me he has been thinking alot and since we have gotten together i have tried to change everything about him and pretty much hes the one that tries to make me happy but i dont do it in return! so my question is what should i do about this?????? I told him from the beginning what i was looking for and now hes mad!I really just feel like this relationship is sinking and sinking fast.
This is what I picked up on: "but i don't do it in return! so my question is what should i do about this??????" "I told him from the beginning what i was looking for and now hes mad!"
There is not much here to work with. The other person has given you the standard marriage is a 50/50 proposition thing. To be of any real help it would be helpful to know what he meant and what you mean by "I told him from the beginning what i was looking for."
It is inevitable that in order for a man and woman to live together as a couple that both are going to have to change somewhat in order to happily coexist. The old toilet seat up or down thing issue is first to come to mind. Their is also the old adage that the woman molds her man into a husband. I use the term old and adage together for today's couple have other standards than their grandparents when this adage actually worked.
Today's couples seem to hold on to their individualism rather than mold into one. Their is nothing wrong with this as it seems to be working quite well, especially with couples who are both career minded.
My advise: Hidden in your last two sentences i the answer to your question. Reread them and then ask yourself what promises you may have made that you haven't kept. What and how many changes your husband has made for you and most of all what did you mean by;"I told him from the beginning what i was looking for." If the answer does not come to you then marriage counseling may be in order.
Open Question:
My 44 year old aunt is pregnant, Could something happen to her if she has the baby?
My aunt Jess is 44 (I think) and she jus told us that she's 4 months pregant. This is her only baby. She's been pregnant before but the other babies died really early before they were born. So anyway. I heard that its not good for old women to have babies. I heard that they can die or the babies can die or both. I'm really worried about aunt jess because she's helped my dad take care of me and my siblings since my mom left when me and my twin were babies (my mom was depressed). Aunt jess is like a mom to me, the only mom I've ever known even though my dads had lots of girlfriends. I dnt wanna lose aunt jess. I dnt want the baby to kill her. I'm scared. But aunt jess has wanted a baby for a long time. She said we're like her babies but its not the same. What's gonna happen to her? Will she be okay? What about the baby? What if aunt jess is ok but she looses the baby and gets the same kind of depressed that my mom had and leaves like she did. I need aunt jess, I love her and I dnt know what to do. Do you think she will be okay?
The risk factors during pregnancy increase in women over the age of 35. This is why for women over the age of 35 their pregnancies are considered high risk. Most of what I have read show the biggest risks are to the baby from lower quality eggs, although there are risk to the mother as well.
You have every right to be concerned, although I feel your biggest fear is fear of the unknown. Take the time to find out what the risk factors really are and what can be done to avoid them or mitigate them. Talk to your Aunt about them and ask if you can go with her to he doctor if you feel the need to for more assurance if nothing else, that the doctor is taking good care of your Aunt and is aware of the risks and monitoring your Aunt. Your Aunt will also need someone to help her with some of the house work and other things she does. You can be a big help during her pregnancy by taking over some of these responsibilities.
You can start your research by visiting the following website and then find some of your own:http:
//www.planningfamily.com/pregnancy/pregnancy-risk-factors/age/
so like, im a guy and all right, and im really young, im about to turn 20. not that it matters with this question
but for some reason, often, whatever i eat turns up in my shit, and its nasty.
like a month ago, i ate cotton candy icecream at Cold Stone and my shit was neon blue. And yesterday i had Chipotle and this morning when i went to shit there was corn in the shit and some bits of salsa. n kits kinda nasty i mean, you know. And it wasnt even digested corn or chewed corn... it was like fresh from the fridge corn. Like it was perfect. And last week my roomate cooked brocolli and carrots and when i shitted there were litttle sprouts in the shit. I mean, i dont have diarrhea or anything, my shit is fresh, but for some reason, whatever i eat turns up in my shit. I didnt wanna look at it to see what was wrong, so i took my digital camera and me and my roomate took a pic of it with our eyes closed. So i uploaded it on my computer and zoomed in on the delicious stuff in the shit to see exactly what it was. And me and my roomate were like thats gross dude.
Is tehre something wrong with me or my diet, or is it like some kind of disease. Because im not fat or anything, i work out alot with my roomate and all the girls check us out... so i dont think its my health, but im not sure........
I'm not a doctor and for most of what you are complaining about what your seeing is bits of the undigested roughage you have eaten. The sprouts, and corn and some of the salsa are roughage and are meant to clean out your system. Roughage is the fiber part of of a balanced diet.
What I can't explain is your stool turning blue. This happens in infants when they are given antibiotics their Stool turns pink. It is probably not a big deal but worth checking in with your doctor just in case. You may have some type of problem with the dye food coloring they use for the blue that you need to be aware of.
Hi! In 2012, my friend and I are going to go to London for an anime convention and we're doing our planning now, the best we can anyway. We calculated the hotel cost as well as the convention cost, but we're having trouble finding how much the plane tickets would cost. All the sites I went to are extremely confusing... Or is it not possible to find how much the plane ticket would cost in July of 2012? We plan to stay for a week too... Are there any sites that give just the price? Or have updates to tell us when the price changes?
Most Airlines will book a ticket 350 days in advance. These tickets are usually the cheapest fares those flights will be because of the advance booking and payment. While there is a chance the fare could go down that chance is a slim one and you may be able to get some type of rebate by booking with one of the dot com fare sites like Orbitz or others.
As for budgeting I would suggest using the fares currently in effect and adding a small percentage to cover inflation and fuel cost adjustments, 5% should cover this. Remember the earlier you book and pay for the ticket the lower the price.
To see the difference in price look at a fare to travel two weeks from now and then for the same travel 350 days from now. The fare for 350 days from now will probably be close to what you are offered in late July or early August of this year when you try and book your tickets.
I am trying to find out how myself and a possible sibling can go about getting a DNA test done. I know there are the kinds u can by over the counter but i wanted to see if i can go to my doctor? This possible sibling could share the same birth father but wont know til we are tested.She is his daughter and he could be mine. I was never tested and he never claimed to be my father or even acknowledge me. I wanted to see if insurance covers this? All i want to find out if i am his daughter? and medical history. I dont need a father never had one and so bitter over it i dont want him in my life. Just wanted to see if we can have a test done at a doctors office vs over the counter and if insurance will cover because we are both over 18.
You have asked a very good question, one I have not seen before on this site and unfortunately there is no one true answer for that I am aware of.
First you need to check with the insurance company you have coverage with as only they can answer this question. For me to say yes this is or no it is not would not be a true answer. What one insurance company may cover another one may not. I believe this to be extremely true with your question as to whether they would cover this test.
What you are asking for could also be called a paternity test. When talking to the insurance company make sure to use both DNA and paternity when taking to them. You might say; "would you cover a DNA test to settle a paternity issue", or wording to that extent.
I wish I had a better answer for you. When it comes to Insurance Companies they are not all alike. Coverage differs from one to the other.
I am female, 16 and have my permit. I want my licence so bad, I want to go out and do things without my parents. Now, I'm not afraid to drive as much as I'm afraid that I'll get hurt or worse, hurt someone else. I don't know why, but I think about that and I feel like I never want to get my licence. But I want to be able to drive on my own I just have a big fear holding me back and I don't know how to get rid of it! Any ideas to help me get over this fear and just go do it, just go out and drive? Thanks
The advice given by the others are all good. I'll just add the following.
Lee Iacocca the former President of Chrysler Corporation once said; "You can Lead, Follow or Get out of the way". One can interpret this statement in different ways which makes this statement a favorite of mine.
Applying this statement to your question; you could interpret for you to think about this. No one wants to be responsible for hurting someone else, therefore you are going to drive responsibly. By driving responsibly you can be a leader and not follow the ways of other young people who drive irresponsibly.
If you are responsible and show others the way you are a leader and not a follower. What is left is fear. Will fear of the unknown cause you to step aside, which leads to another statement I like: "The only thing you have to fear is fear itself". You can influence the future by being responsible but I don't believe you can change the future, not after what I experienced.
I never saw myself being disabled by a car wreck. I have over 3 million safe miles of driving. Then one day I'm sitting at a traffic light and wham I'm rear ended by someone doing 60 mph. My injuries are not disfiguring but they were and are career ending all because someone else was in a hurry. I always knew this was possible I just never felt it would happen to me and therefore never let it paralyze me with fear.
So what you have to decide is will you:"Lead, Follow or Get out of the way".
is it bad to push your other friends away when you have one main friend?
Short answer to your question: Yes.
As to why: Put yourself in the position of the friend being pushed away because your BFF has found someone they feel is their new BFF. How does this make you feel?
Enemies are easy to make, friends are hard to make and harder to keep. When you make a friend you should do everything possible to keep all your friends and include your new friend into activities with your old friends.
These are just my feeling on your question. I hope they have helped
Ugh. The same old A+ staring back at me. No one to talk to except a stray piece of paper, or a napkin; something that will listen. As a kid I would talk to a ragged teddy bear, which got lost. Everyone hates me. If I start a conversation or try to join one, they move away, wrinkling their noses. Is it really my fault that at eleven-almost-twelve I have the worst complexion in the world, along with the facts that I'm twice their height, can't play sports, and am just a failure. I can't even swim! Everyone believes that I'm not getting picked on just because I'm tall! Tall people can get picked on just as much as short people. I've been so stressed lately, and my dad wants me to be perfect. And then last week I got a C-! I've been too afraid to tell anyone. My life is a train wreck.
While school for me was several decades ago I can remember what it was like to be tall, awkward and uncoordinated. I felt awkward and uncoordinated which made it worse and I refused to do anything that might help me. I was so tall that the basketball coach wanted me on the basketball team in the worst way. He promised me he could teach me how to play. I should have listened to him. Hindsight is very clear.
There are things you can do to overcome your awkwardness; dance lessons are one way. Don't laugh, NFL teams use ballet classes to help improve certain moves on the field.
As for your complexion: When I was your age there was not much doctors could do for those of us with skin problems. Today modern medicine can and has helped many teenagers. Part of the problem with teenage skin problems is linked to the hormonal eruptions taking place as you go through puberty. Today a trained Dermatologist may be able to help you. If you have not seen a Dermatologist ask your parents if they will make arrangements for you to see one. Many of the insurance programs employers supply will cover a dermatology visit. Ask your parents to check their policy.
Now for the C-: You did not say what subject this was in, if it was a subject you are generally good in, was a pop quiz; were not feeling well that day or if you were just caught unprepared. Did something happen in the hallway between classes to distract you from the task at hand such as being picked upon. What I'm getting at is there is usually a good reason why a generally good student gets a poor grade. On the bright side a C- is not a failing grade and will not effect your overall average, for that class/subject, as badly as an F would have.
Just be honest with your dad as to why this grade may have happened. If this was a test or a pop quiz talk to your teacher, if you were distracted by an incident prior to class tell the teacher. Ask if a make up quiz/test is possible or if you can do an extra credit assignment to improve the grade.
The world is only a train-wreck if you let it be. Be proactive and find ways to improve the things about yourself that you find are holding you back. Ask for help; I have found that people like to help and like to teach. They are just waiting for someone to ask them.
My boyfriend and I have great sex. The issue is, he has trouble making me come quickly. While I myself can take care of it in 10 minutes, it takes him anywhere from 15 minutes to 30, or 40. Not an issue for me. But he has ADHD and gets bored, and feels like he dosent have the energy. But he dosent want to never get me off and just think of himself, so sometimes, hard on or no, he will avoid sex entirely due to the fact that he dosent have the energy to try to get me off. This really hurts my feelings and I have no idea what I'm supposed to do about it. I told him that fine, I will just take care of me, just lets have sex, and I'll take care of me afterwards. Advice? Comments?
I tried to find some research or study to refer you to on your question. While there was some research on the subject of sex and male ADHD none that I found was relevant to your question.
Lacking any study or guidance on the subject the only thing I can think of to tell you is; patience. Remember what ADHD stands for and take the time to try and teach you boyfriend to spend more time on foreplay.The more excited he gets you before intercourse the less time you will need to climax.
Me and my boyfriend have been going out for almost four years, I am 18 and he is 22. We were each others first, and we started having sex around 6 months, we did it at the park, in this secret hidden area since we couldn't do it at each others home's or anything well anyway I think a girl going down on him was always his fantasy so the second day we tried sex he made me go down on him and I gagged a lot but he loved it and then I tried him going down on me but he would go down and then up and stare at it and he had this face of like confusion and kind of disgust I'm clean shaven and I have good hygiene and since then I never brought it up since I thought he was disgusted by it but recently this year I started feeling it was so selfish because I go down on him at least two times a day I just feel like its so selfish because he gets the pleasure out of it and I get nothing, that's his favorite thing to do always he doesn't go a day without it and its been four years and I started bringing it up this year and he's like "oh I will" and "okay babe I will" and one day he tried it and he stopped like after three seconds and I was asking him if I was nasty or what? and he said he didn't know what to do and felt like he didn't know what he was doing.and I dk what to tell him to do because I've never had that done to me. I don't understand how HE can't know because he watches p*rn a lot and I know in the p*rn videos the guys who down and them zoom in and crap :( (porn is disgusting to me I gag when watching it so I don't know wanna watch it) and I really want him to do that because the face he makes and the pleasure he gets when I do it to him I want to feel that too and my friends say its the most pleasurable thing ever and I can only imagine cause once he kisses me in that area even on my legs I feel so amazing and I just wish he would go down on me, its my fantasy too:( what can I do? or how can I persuade him or do I have no hope?
The greatest thing about sex is learning about your partners likes and dislikes. Communication is key to everything in life including sex.
You need to tell your bf you feel left out with his not wanting to go down on you, for whatever his reason is. Tell him how it feels when he kisses your leg and how you would love it if he continued all the way up to the center of your being.
Tell him you are willing to learn more about what he would like in bed if he is willing to show and teach you; as you are to show and teach him. I believe if you are both open in you communication with each other you will have a better sex life.
I have been suicidal since I was 13yrs and now i'm 30 and still suicidal. my mom got married and went to live with her husband and they had kids.i was left under the care of my gran and aunts who pretended to love me.i'm now working and have been diagnosed with endometriosis. i wanted to have a family but seemingly i cant find the right guy and my family doesnt give a damn about me and i cant even have children.i'm so tired of being hopeful and trying new relationships and its always the same results,those ppl eventually leave me. i've read all the selfhelp books one can think of and the bible, asked Gid for help but things always go wrong for me.i'm not happy at work,i cant study anymore. i feel like ending it all right now.i've hopeful and optimistic for a long time now, so i need a quick amd easy way to kill myself and make the death look so natural, so that my insurances can payout.
First no one on this site will offer you any help in trying to kill yourself. What we will do is offer you love and support to get help and through whatever is currently bothering you.
The one thing I do not see in what you have written is that you have not asked for or have been given any professional help. With the right kind of help the depression you are feeling, depression being the major cause of suicidal feelings, can be dealt with and you made to feel better. This I know for a fact for like you I have dealt with depression most of my life.
There are a number of ways to seek help. Lets start with: National Suicide Prevention Lifeline 1-800-273-TALK (8255):This is a 24/7 365 day hotline answered by a team of trained volunteers who can direct you to one of their 150 crisis center, or professional help within your home area.
You don't want to talk to anyone at this time, but do need help not hurting yourself, call 911 and just tell the call taker you are depressed and thinking of hurting yourself. They will send help to care for you and take you to the emergency room. Don't worry about cost, if you health insurance doesn't cover there ara programs that will. Your well being comes first, how the bill is going to be payed is far down on the list.
If you can get yourself to the hospital emergency room then do so. Professional help can make a difference. I'm living proof of that. When I finally received the right kind of help the world took on a whole new prospective for me and it will for you as well.
You feel as if no one cares. What about us, we care. We have taken the time to write to you and ask you to give life another chance. All you need to do is ask for help, the right kind of help. Please either call the national hotline or go to the hospital emergency room. Do not give up on life. The world is a better place with you in it. That I promise you.
I've realized that I sometimes am attracted to females. Like, I watch lesbian porn sometimes and I have a lot of gay friends. I know neither of those things "make you gay", but lately I've started having feelings for a friend of mine who is female. I'm not quite sure if I just want to hook up with her or if I truly have emotional feelings. What do I do? Is there even anything I should do? (Oh by the way, this friend is a pansexual.)
I would be hesitant to place a label on your sexuality. At your age both boys and girls are still trying to figure out their sexuality. To label yourself as a Lesbian or even bi-curious would not only be wrong but self defeating at this time. To even put this in the category of a phase that most young people go through would not be right either.
There are a number of reasons for sexual attraction to someone of our own sex at this age. First and foremost is the fact it is safer and easier to relieve the sexual tension brought on by the changing hormones your body is producing. Parents think nothing of two children of the same sex being behind closed doors, sleeping together, even in the same bed, particularly females.
I have known women that have been bi all through college, then gone straight heterosexual afterwards. Reason it was easier and sex was more available if you were bi; it was also safer.
My advice: Don’t put a label on your sexuality at this time. Just enjoy learning about who you are sexually. When you are older if you still want to put a label on your sexuality then do so, but for now just enjoy being you.