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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
Okay, so this might be hard to make sense of but here goes.
When I was year five I had my first boyfriend, I really liked him and he really liked me. Then we broke up after four months. It didn't get to me, I just moved on to another guy.. But I didn't like him the way I had liked my ex boyfriend.. But I had heard that he did like me so I went out with him, not coz i liked him but coz i wanted a boyfriend. After we broke up, I didnt feel anything. I don't fall in love anymore, I don't feel happy or excited, not even nervous or angry... I lack emotions.
I am now year nine in high school and I thought that it was about time i researched what the heck is wrong with me. So I researched all last night and came across something called 'ANTISOCIAL PERSONALITY DISORDER' and it was amazing at how many of the symptoms I can relate to... And it was amazing how there are so many other people out there who feel the same way like this.
I don't know what to do anymore... I don't know who I am anymore. Ive lacked emotions since year five, I am now in year nine. its been five years... Nowadays I just pretend that im happy or excited, angry or nervous.. and i also pretend i fall in love like normal people. so i don't look like im not human or something..
Please help, its not as easy as it may look, going for five years without emotions. its hard work.
I am 14 years old and I am a female.
The worst thing anyone can do for or to themselves is to self diagnose a medical condition. Just because you see a symptom on a page that you feel relates to you; does not mean you and the true definition of that symptom are joined in anyway. This takes a trained medical professional such as a psychiatrist to interpret that and your symptom(s).
I am not a doctor and cannot make a diagnoses. I live with someone who does work in the mental health field; from what I know of this particular disorder and what you have written. I would doubt you have a true Antisocial personality.
Irregardless of what I think, it is easy to see you are not happy. This is not good for anyone, especially someone your age. If you have not discussed this with your parents then I would suggest you do so and ask to see a doctor.
Usually Medical help for what I think may be bothering you starts with a visit to your family doctor. I can tell from what you have written you do not live in the USA. Which is where I'm from. So all I can suggest is as I said; inform your parents of how you feel, then follow whatever is the proper form for seeing doctors in your country and manner of health care.
Please do not continue to try and self diagnose yourself. This will only lead you to more worry and wrong conclusions. Talk to your parents and see a doctor.
okay so i have been researching ADHD and i think that i might have it! Like i can not pay attention i try really hard but it just seems like the teachers in school are speaking an entire different language! And even my friends notice that i am just so hyper and can never stay still! Like you could come and wake me up at 3 O'clock in the morning and i will be totally fine! and actually i am kind of growing away from my friends and i just sit in my room by myself sometimes texting. My mom is always working to try to pay the mortgage on time and get in all her payments that she owes. So i the last thing that i want is to spend more money. But i am in all normal classes in school but i have a F in science and a D- in Social Studdies and in English i have a D. so i dont really know what is happening and i am falling behind in spanish i used to have a A but it is droping and now a C! so i really dont know what is happening it is just like i am loosing intrest in everything and i dont really know what to do about it! so if you say tell and adult tell me how! thank you!
It is possible that you do have a form of ADHD Usually ADHD manifests itself earlier in life but it is possible to have it manifest itself during puberty. The only way to know for sure is to be tested.
This testing starts with a visit to your family doctor for a complete physical. Tell your doctor what you have told us. Your doctor will most likely want to run different test including blood tests to rule out any physical problems before sending you to someone who can properly diagnose you and treat you for ADHD.
The reason for the visit to your doctor is as I said to rule out any physical problems. It is possible that the hormonal changes you are going through has touched of a fire storm some place that is causing something that may mimic ADHD. This needs to be ruled out first. Then you can be tested.
First thing you need to do is to tell your mom. Her first thoughts I'm sure are to your well being. If she is aware of this sudden change in your school work she is going to want to know if there is a medical reason. Would it not be better for her to know this than for her to sit around thinking you have started doing drugs. For that is what it may look like to her or any other parent whose child suddenly goes from A's to failing.
Once you have told your mom, then make an appointment with the family doctor. As I said tell the doctor what you have told us. After the doctor has examined you follow the doctors instructions.
What do you do if you think you have appendicitis?
I think I have appendicitis. I always feel sharp pains in my stomach and shoulder. It hurts really bad. I went to the doctor and she said it might be appendicitis. They gave me some nexium pills but sometimes they don't work. I feel sharp pains in my stomach side and my shoulder. It hurts really bad.What do I do?
Appendicitis can sometimes be hard to diagnose especially if it is not acute.
My advice is to seek a second opinion or go to a hospital emergency room where they can do x rays and blood work so as to confirm or rule out appendicitis. Do this now before it becomes acute and you need emergency surgery.
ok so after she kept begging and begging, i finally told my bff (who is a straight girl and who i really like as more than a friend) that im bi but when she got mad at me she told another girl and her mom. when we made up i wanted her to come over but she said her mom wont let her call or text or have any out of school contact with me. so one time i decided to text her anyway and this is what i said: i just wanted 2 say i love you. you dont have 2 text back but i just wanted you to know that" i figured she would take it as a friendly "i love you" but i guess she didnt. . .so i guess her mom read the text and my friend came into school and she goes "my mom is scared that you r gonna screw me and eat me out" so i said "we are in 7th grade not high school! and besides i would never do something you didnt want me to do to you and i could never force you to do that!" ive never told her to her face that i like her but i know she knows. and she told her mom that i like her too. anyway, so her number shows up on my cell and so i opened the text and it said "this is her mother. please stop texting her" and i wrote back "um ok but i havent been texting her recently but ok" i dont know if her mother is a homophobic (which seems unlikey because her parents are lesbians) or if shes insane or what. i dont know what to do but it hurts to not be able to contact my friend at all because of her mother. please help me and offer some advice on what to do and say,opinions, etc. p.s. i cant tell my parents anything about this because i am not ready to tell them i am bi.
I would be hesitant to place a label on your sexuality. At your age both boys and girls are still trying to figure out their sexuality. To label yourself as bi would not only be wrong but self defeating at this time. To even put this in the category of a phase that most young people go through would not be right either.
There are a number of reasons for sexual attraction to someone of our own sex at this age. First and foremost is the fact it is safer and easier to relieve the sexual tension brought on by the changing hormones your body is producing. Parents generally think nothing of two children of the same sex being behind closed doors, sleeping together, even in the same bed, particularly females.
I have known women that have been bi all through college, then gone straight heterosexual afterwards. Reason it was easier and sex was more available if you were bi; it was also safer.
As for why your friends parents, who as you say are lesbians, feel and are treating you the way they are. The only thing I can think of is they want your friend to discover her sexuality on her own. They may also feel she is to young to be experiencing any type of sexual contact at her age, which I'm guessing you are both around 13.
Being 13 is far to young to be having sex of any type. It is okay to fantasize about sex and sexuality it is another to actually have sex.
My advise is that you stop telling people you are bi for I don't think you truly are bi. I think you love, generically, both boys and girls which is giving you the feeling you are bi. Wait until you are older, more of an adult and can truly understand your sexuality before you stick a label on yourself.
I see nothing wrong with being bi, bi-curious, gay or lesbian. As your finding out other people do have a problem with it, especially in someone as young as you. So wait until your more of an adult and had the opportunity to more fully explore your sexuality. Do not be in a rush to have sex. Certainly 13 year olds should not be having sex of any type.
Hi,
I just started working at a new school. I do enjoy my job but it gets tough and nerve wrecking at times because I believe my boss dislikes me. I have tried it all, from just working, kissing up, or just flying under the radar. What can I do to get her to like me, and how can I deal with her, because we need to work together for a while. Thank you for the response!
I'm not sure this is going to help as some of your information is missing. From what you have written it sounds very much like something I heard at a lecture I attended. The lecturer was a Dr. Timothy Edmond's ( I think this is his correct name, it has been over 30 years) a PHD in psychology from Louisiana State University.
As he told his story he had a supervisor for whom he could not satisfy either. So one day he sat down with his supervisor and asked just exactly what it was that the supervisor wanted him to be doing. As the supervisor ran through the list of things he pulled out a pocket notebook and wrote down each thing as an item in a list.
When the supervisor finished with the list of things he wanted done, Dr. Edmond's read the list back and asked if this is what the supervisor wanted of him. The answer was yes. Dr. Edmond's then said this is what you expect of me, nothing more and nothing less correct. The supervisor acknowledge that this was exactly what he wanted and expected.
Dr. Edmond's then dated and placed the time of day of the meeting on the page and put the notebook in his pocket. The following week Dr. Edmond's began doing exactly what was on the list, nothing more and nothing less. By the end of the week he is supervisor called him into the office furious that other things were not getting done.
DR. Edmond's pulled out his notebook and read back the list of things his supervisor had said was expected of him from the previous weeks meeting. According to Dr. Edmond's from that point on he and his supervisor got along famously.
I've used this myself one or twice in the past 30 years and it has worked well. I'm not sure this will help in your situation, but thought I would pass it along.
I need to lose 15-20 pounds in about 20 days I need exercises I can do inside and healthy eating habits please bc I kinda have no will power I've been trying to chew gum to get my mind off the food
It is NOT SAFE TO LOOSE THIS MUCH WEIGHT IN THIS TIME PERIOD. You will be doing yourself more harm than the good loosing the weight will do you.
The proper way to loose weight starts with a visit to your doctor and a complete physical. Then with your doctor supervising your diet and a proper weight goal in mind. You should visit a nutritionist for a proper diet plan. A proper weight goal is one that is right for your body, frame size and level of activity. The nutritionist will plan a diet around these factors as well. Then with proper exercise and regular visits to your doctor you will not only loose the weight you want too, but you most likely will keep it off.
The problems with fad diets, quick loss diet is they may help you loose weight quickly but rarely do you keep the weight off. Quick loss diets are very often harmful as well since they do not take certain needed factors about you into consideration. That is why you should never start a diet without first consulting with your doctor and allowing your doctor to medically supervise you while dieting.
Whatever your reason for wanting to loose that much weight in so little time is not worth possibly harming yourself over. If you truly need to loose that type of weight, then do so. But so so properly.
13/f
Is it weird to get aroused to the thought of someone hurting me? Not like beating me, but like during sex taking a knife and making little cuts just enough to where they bleed? I mean, im 13.... I really shouldn't have these thoughts. I also get aroused when i think of a guy... like dominating me. Its just weird. And i live in a house hold where if there's something wrong, and you need to go to a therapist of be on depression meds you get disowned and thrown out of the family. And you'll get sent to a far away school where you'll live there. Its happened to my sister betheny and my cousin Danny.... What should i do?
There is nothing wrong with a fantasy life just as long as you know the difference between fantasy and reality. That being said I believe at your present age you are trying to find your sexuality, which is okay as long as you do so in the realm of the fantasy world. You are far to young to be acting on these fantasies and having sex.
There is nothing wrong with having these type of thoughts. I believe as I said it is part of you find your sexuality. Exploring these thoughts at your age is wrong. When you are older and of legal age, if you want to explore this side of sexuality that is something to think of at that time.
For now my advice is to be 13, allow your body to adjust to the changes that will happen over the next several years. Enjoy your transformation from little girl to womanhood. There is plenty of time later in life to experiment with other things.
Does anyone know any reliable websites where you can put the textbook's ISBN number and it will give you websites where you can find it the cheapest. I know that one does exist but I don't know what it's called.
Thanks in advance!
I put the following in to my Yahoo search engine; "Finding cheap College text books by ISBN". What was returned was a whole list of sites including Amazon.com. Google search even returned a site where you could rent text books.
Try doing as I did, I'm sure you will find a site that has the books you are looking for.
18/f
So, I have been dating my boyfriend for three years now and we have just started having sex (as in its been a few months now). However, we have been doing everything else for about 2 years.
When i was younger, we had a live-in babysitter. It wasnt EXACTLY that he would touch anything specific, but on many occassions his hands would be technically down my pants. When I was little I thought nothing of it cause I trusted him alot. It wasnt until about grade 4 or so that I started realizing something wasn't right, especially on nights he would do the same thing when I was thought to be asleep (I would purposely turn over the stop it).
He's far away now and my family does not know. The only people that do are my boyfriend and some close friends. However, I have been reading things that traumatic experiences when younger can affect someones ability to open up I suppose sexually. Pretty much, I have never had an orgasm and its starting to upset my boyfriend.
There have been times when I feel Ive gotten really close, but it gets to the point that I will physically grab him to make him stop. I never let him pass that point and I can't help it. I almost mentally just start saying stop, even though it feels amazing, and I will make him stop.
Do you think this could do with my past? Is there anything I can do to get past this? I really just want my boyfriend to not feel bad, and he really does a great job... I just can't help but make him stop.
Any ideas?
I feel you are now realizing you were sexually abused by your baby sitter when you were young. For this I am sincerely sorry. No one should have to go through this or live with the aftermath of this type of abuse.
My advise is that you contact an organization called RAINN. RAINN stands for Rape, Abuse, Incest Nation Network. They operate a 24/7 hotline with trained volunteers who can help you find professional in you community that you can go to for help. As you are finding you can not bury what has happened to you. You have to confront it and deal with it so that you can move on and have a normal life. RAINN has found the professionals who have the training to help you with this. To contact RAINN dial 1-800-656-HELP(4657). All contact with RAINN and the professional they refer you to is confidential.
Im a teenageed guy, and ive always had anger problems. I go to a highschool where i am surrounded with the kinds of people i dont like. And for some reason, i get angered at mostly girls. Sometimes i feel like hitting them, and even killing them. I honestly believe that some of them need to be dead, because they are such stupid bitches with no fucking manners. I know that what i think is wrong, but sometimes i feel like killing these people. Like today, this fucking bitch who i dont even know tried to boss me around during our graduation practice. And then on the way home some fucker tried to race me and i lost. All my7 anger is built up with these fuckers and i want to kill them. But i cant, how do i deal with this kinds of feelings?
What you say and the way you say it could be construed as Homicidal Ideation. Your saving grace is that you know it is wrong to kill anyone. Still these thoughts are a serious problem requiring professional help.
The fact that you have these thoughts on a regular even a daily basis places you in danger. Please either call 911 and tell the call taker what you have written us or go to the nearest hospital emergency room and show them what you have written us.
You know you need help and this is the quickest way to get that help. You need to get help before you allow yourself to act on these impulses and hurt yourself or someone else.
my bf and i are a very happy couple. however, on the occasions that we do fight, his anger gets awful. when we first started dating, it wasn't that bad (he'd yell and things like that). over time, it's gotten worse (punching walls, calling me names). he's never hit me, but today we got into a fight and i admit (i smacked him and things, but i only do that if i felt like he was crossing the line). and although i'm wrong for doing it, he called me things like the 'b word', and he even shoved me violently and pinned me down on the bed to get in my face. also, he threw something at me. every time we reconcile, he keeps saying how he knows how angry he gets and he tries to calm it. but then he blames ME for getting him that angry and that's why it gets uncontrollable. i don't know who's wrong here anymore. it's not like he's violent all the time (no, he's not abusive in the normal sense). but it just happens when we argue. someone please tell me what to do thank you.
From what I am reading you are both showing signs of classic abusers; "i smacked him and things, but i only do that if i felt like he was crossing the line." This is an excuse not a defense. You hit him, that's abuse. He pinned you to the bed, that's abuse.
Should you be working to save this relationship? Frankly I don't know? I find it hard to believe you can love one another and treat each other this way. There has to be an underlying problem causing these fights that you have not shared with us. You first have to identify the underlying problem causing the fights and see if there is a resolution to that or those problems. If you cannot resolve the problems(s) then the relationship cannot be saved and it would be best if the two of you just moved on.
I know what I wrote is hard to hear and even harder to accept. Stop and think about what I wrote. At one time you were a happy couple; what has changed; something has changed and it is that which you first have to identify.
Couples counseling may be needed to resolve these issues. But counseling has to be something you both want to do if it is going to be successful. You both have to into counseling open minded resolved to work with counselor to resolve issues.
The answer to your question is that you are both abusing each other. This is not a formula for a successful relationship. I have given you possible solutions the rest is up to you.
Hello, so I'm 15 sixteen soon..but next year I will be a Sophomore.
To start off, I had a horrible year in English because of very immature people, I know I can't avoid that but I'm very good in English it's my best subject, so I decided to take advanced English..I have to do read a book and do a journal over the summer which I'm working on it now, since I'm a fast reader ( and it was a small book haha)
I'm nervous that I won't be able to be with my friends, and I'm worried that I'll be stuck with people who don't really like me. I'm not popular ..I don't really talk to people who don't like me, but if I do talk to someone I'm very nice..I'm very polite to people.
I'll be taking Integrated math this year as well, which makes me feel stupid ;/ I've had issues with math ever since 3rd grade.. It just doesn't click with me. The teacher told the class before the last day of school, that she thinks integrated is harder and I'm like "WHAT? O.O".. I just feel stupid for taking an advanced, than taking an integrated ;//
Any words of encouragement?
Lets first start with your class assignments. As a parent I see nothing wrong with having the school system assign classes that provide my child with a challenging environment. That is provided my child has the proper preparatory classes for that class and there is a high level of confidence from everyone, including my child, that my child can be successful in this class.
It sounds like you have not grounded yourself with a stable foundation in Math. To be taking any type of advanced classes in Math does not sound like a road to success for you. Instead you should be taking math classes that will reaffirm the basics and rebuild the foundation you need so you can take advance math in the future.
I would suggest you and your parents have a meeting with your guidance counselor to review your class assignments before the next school year starts. The guidance counselors are available over the summer for meetings such as the one I am suggesting. There is no reason you should be put in a position of failing when it is possible to put you in a position that will allow you to learn and excel.
As to the other problem you write about. On this you are going to have to trust me in what I have to tell you. High School friends are not long term friends. In a year or so you will all go separate ways as you go off to different colleges, the military or start careers. High School friendships are also not like College or adult friendships. They are childless and child like in how they are formed and maintained. If you are a good student and they are not you are shunned unless they can use you for there own good. If you are an introverted person, which you may be, they do not understand this so they ignore you.
I believe that when people, this includes other students, take the time to get to know you they will like you. For your part you have to work at being a little more extroverted. Look for people like yourself, the ones that stand off in a corner away from the groups. Go up to them and introduce yourself; it is not hard to do.
I can tell from what you have written you have a lot to offer someone as a friend and as a potential girlfriend for some young man. The biggest problem in starting a friendship has been resolved for you; that is a common interest. If you are classmates you have a common interest. So start there.
i am a male from pakistani want to fuck my mom she is really very sexy having large boobs
That is called incest and is illegal in just about every country I can think of.
It is said in psychology classes that boys will have these thoughts about their mothers. To act upon them is not normal and as I said in most countries illegal. If this is something more than just a passing thought then you need professional help.
I am deathly afraid of shots and i have to get 7th grade shots!!!! I am so scared!!! i would rather not eat for 3 days than get a shot!! anyone have anything to get my mind of this or what is a tecniqe to use so i get distracted?
The two answers before mine are excellent answers. Distracting yourself and telling the nurse or tech you are scared of needles helps as they have techniques they can use to make it easier on you.
I don't like needles either. Unfortunately I get a lot of them because of a car accident I was in and this is how they handle my injuries. One thing they need to do is give me an IV prior to the big needles they use in treating me. The IV is to give me pain medicine and relax me while we are in the procedure room.
I have found that watching them place the IV catheter makes the whole thing less scary and even less painful. But that is just me, it may not work for you. Sometimes if you know how something is going to work or when it is going to happen it is less scary.
The needles they use today are much better that the once they used as recently as 5 years ago. They are thinner and cause less pain. For the most part the pain is more in being scared than in the actual needle injection itself.
I've been dating this guy for about a year and he says he's ready for us to take our relationship to the next step but every time we'd come close to having sex I'd ask him to stop. The thing is, I was sexually abused as a child (it started at about 5 or 6 and didnt end until I was 12), which he doesnt know. His younger brother (my best friend) and my older sister who helped stop the abuse are the only ones that know about it. Im actually surprised that I can talk about it here. Anyway, because of that Im just really nervous about having sex (to say the least). I know theres a difference between rape and sex. And I like kissing and making out with Kevin, but whenever he touches me or when he starts to get a little rough from being so 'over excited' I just freeze up or freakout. He thinks Im being a tease which is definitely not the case, so ofcourse we just end up fighting and its just soo emotionally draining for me. Ive tried to tell him about what happened but I just cant. He seems to just be getting more and more frustrated (he's not a virgin, in fact he's far from it). The last time I'd asked him to stop he got angry and said that if I wouldn't sleep with him he'd find someone who would. Im sure he didnt mean it but It really hurt me, and scared me because I know that if he wanted to he could. Im trying soo hard and I love him soo much. He's a great guy; He's nice, funny, smart and he's gorgeous. He's all Ive ever wanted. I just really don't want things to end between us. What should I do? (Im 18 and he's 23, he's my best friend's brother and I've known him for 3 years.)
You should not have to continue to live with this kind of secret. If kept bottled up it can have very damaging effects on you for the rest of your life. You need professional help to deal with this and put it properly behind you.
To this a group called RAINN which stands for: Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network. They operate a 24/7 365 day hotline to help you find professionals in your area that will help you with what has happened to you.
You cannot bury what has happened to you deep inside you and pretend it never happened. The fact that you are writing us tells me you know that. You are going to need professional help to properly deal with what has happened so that you can live the life you were meant to live.
What I would like you to do is call RAINN their number is 1-800-656-Help (4357). Talk with one of the volunteers who answer the hotline. Answer there questions and they will put you in-touch with professional in your home town who can help you.
From what you have written it sounds as if your parents are not aware of the fact you were molested or who molested you. They need to know this. The professionals at RAINN will help you with this as well. Please call them
17/f.
For a very long time, I have suspected that I have Borderline Personality Disorder, as I display almost all of the symptoms, and it is very common with BPD sufferers to have been abused as children. I didn't ever consider this as a possibility (as I have no recollection of being abused) until recently, when I started to think about myself, and suddenly a lot of things started coming together:
- Ever since I was very young, about 3, this weird feeling would suddenly pounce on me - it's a kind of sick feeling, and even when I was that young, I associated it with sex. I don't know why, it's not something I've ever thought through, it's just what comes into my head when I get this feeling. I used to get this more as a child than I do now, but I still get it sometimes. It's always happened more often in the morning, when I've not been awake for long, but it sometimes comes in flashes during the day/evening.
- I still get this feeling, without fail, for a long time the morning after I have been sexually intimate (or even just laid cuddling) with someone, even if it's someone I really like.
- At the age of about 6, up to about 10, I would play 'sex games' with other children, boys and girls - my cousins, in fact. I feel very ashamed looking back on this. I know other kids do this, but I get the feeling we always took it further - we pretty much went the whole way, except it wasn't really like proper sex, it's hard to describe. I remember being very sexually aroused even at that young age, and I was always the one who initiated it.
- I used to write all the time (still do), and when I was about 7, I wrote a story about a girl getting raped. It wasn't just any girl, though, it was a girl I knew from school, with whom I had a sort of friend/enemy relationship. I don't know if this has any significance.
- Also, when I was young (can't remember what age, perhaps 7-10, though I still get them sometimes now) I would have weird sexual fantasies about being sexually dominated and being made to do awful things. Which I'd expect is pretty weird for a seven year old.
- So, when I was young I was always more interested in sex than other people my age.
- Now, however, it's the other way round. I'm still very interested in sex, but I also have a fear of it. Other people my age have a very casual attitude to it and have a lot of sex, whereas I'm a virgin (at least I consider myself one, whether I have been sexually abused or not) and am very scared of sex. I have a fear of intimacy, and I am pretty much prpetually single because I can't get into the physical side of relationships. I have done, but not fully, and I get scared away afterwards.
- I (usually) like the idea of having sex with people I like, but when it almost happens, I get panicky and want to run away.
- I go through states of depression, used to self-harm, have trouble regulating my emotions, and often feel disconnected with others, which are synptoms of sexual abuse.
- I like girls too, and for a while I've been wondering if I'm gay, because these sexual problems seem to be far more exaggerated with men than women, but now I'm just wondering if my inability to be sexual with men is because perhaps that's who I was abused by.
I'm not saying it's a definite - I have no recollection of it, after all. But I have a lot of the symptoms, and it would explain why I have such a weird attitude to sex and intimacy. This attitude has been a massive problem for me for years, and has got in the way of many relationships.
And, if it does sound like I've been abused, what should I do about it? I feel like if I spoke to anyone, they'd think I was just exaggerating or creating stuff in my head.
I can't say for sure one way or the other. Flash backs and repressed memories are hard to deal with and need the help from a trained professional for you to deal with them.
Since you do feel you were abused as a child I know where the best place for you to turn to for help is. The place to turn to is called RAINN. RAINN stands for Rape, Abuse, Incest National Network. They operate a 24/7 365 day hotline where you can call to speak with a trained volunteer. The volunteer will help you find a professional in your home town that you can go to for help to sort these things out. The hotline number is 1-800-656-help.
The fact that you are having these flashbacks says to me that you need help. You need to talk with someone who can help you sort out what these repressed memories mean and how to deal with them. Please call RAINN ands ask for their help.
hi, lately i have been having alot of really bad headaches and takin alot of pain relievers. what could this mean by me having to many headaches, sometimes i get one twice a day but i usually have one everyday and they are really bad. also how can i prevent or relieve them with out taking any medicine. any advice would help. female/ 17
It could be as Girlie14 said that you are dehydrating and need to drink more water. Fact is though we can't make these kinds of diagnosis', as we are not doctors ans should not be doing so.
It is not normal to get headaches everyday or even twice a day. If this is happening o you then you need to tell you parents as they may want to have you check in with a doctor. There are reasons people get dehydrated. If you do not fit the reasons then there may be other medical reasons which need to be checked out by a doctor.
My advise: Talk to mom or dad and ask to see a doctor.
is it normal to have cramps so bad that you start throwin up. female/17
As a male I can't say for sure one way or another. I'm told it is possible. First thing is, if it is possible you could be pregnant, make sure you are not pregnant. If your not pregnant you should check in with your gynecologist as this is a condition you need not necessarily have to live with.
This is also one of the type of things you will go through as you body changes during puberty. These are the type of problems you should be discussing with you mom as she can help you through this. Remember we were all teenagers long before we were ever parents.
There is nothing you will do or go through that we haven't seen, felt or done long before you all came along. I don't say this in jest or to be wise as it is true. Teenagers for some reason think everything they experience is something that has never happened before. Fact is all you are doing is reinventing the wheel so to speak. Let you parents help you, that is what we are here for.
I understand there are somethings you may not want to discuss with a parent, private maybe sexual things. They understand this too. When it comes to your health, and this falls in that area, you should not be afraid to go to mom or even dad for help.
i am a 17 year old girl and want to date a 20 year old. i have fallen in love with him but the age is whats getting me, he will be 21 in august. should i go with him and is it completely wrong. i'm stuck, dont know wat to do. any advice will help
Right now the difference in your ages is really not the point. My mother in-law was 5 years older than my father in-law an had my wife never told me I would have never known that until they passed away.
What is the point is you are 17 and he will be 21. The age of consent comes in to play until you are either above the age of consent, which differs from state to state, or you turn 18. Most likely the age of consent is not a problem, but you need to find out for certain. If for some reason you live in one of the few states where the age of consent is 18 then the problem becomes on of legality for the BF where he can be charged with real crimes starting with statutory rape, child molestation and other crimes they might wish to throw in as well. Whether he would ever be charge with any of these crimes depends on a number of factors coming to pass. None of which I am even going to go into.
If there is no problem with the age of consent, you should have no problem with the age difference. Obviously you do have some problem or you would not be writing to us. As you get older a 3 year age difference won't have the same meaning as it does now. In 3 years the age difference will probably be meaningless to you.
This is something you may want to talk to your mother about. It is not some private sex thing which might embarrass you; it's a dating thing which mom may have some very good insight to. Your mom may have found herself in a similar position when she was your age if so she can tell you how she handled it.
It never hurts to get different perspectives on issues such as this; that is probably why you wrote us in the first place. Your moms perspective is just that; a different point of view for you to ponder while you make a decision.
Ive been with my b/f for 5 years and have always enjoyed sex/love making with him. Lately I cant get into it and havnt orgasmed in a while. What can I do to get in the mood. I dont masturbate, I dont know why I dont, I just feel weird putting my fingers there, but I think I could enjoy myself with a toy I just never felt the need to purchase something so expensive when I can get the real thing. I dont want to substitute him, maybe just learn more about myself so I can enjoy it more with him. Any suggestions?
Julie75 gave you some good suggestions that you might try.
You did not say how old you are although I can assume you are at least 18.
After being with someone for as long as you have, certain things become routine. This would include sex. While you have not said how old you are or whether or not you and your boyfriend are living together, I still think the problem may be monotony. Don't feel bad it happens in many relationships and is probably behind the phrase, "The Seven Year Itch."
In any relationship communication is very important, this includes a sexual relationship. If you find that your sex lives have become routine, meaning it's Saturday night so we make love,then you and your BF need to communicate. You need some spontaneity.
Just what that might be for you I don't know. If you always make love in the bedroom then maybe finding some other place. Maybe it is him coming home grabbing you and bending you over he table of sofa. Maybe it is you initiating lovemaking and attacking him in some way. Tell each other what your fantasies are. We all have them. Maybe watching some porno movies will spice things up, you never know until you try something. But first you need to talk to each other.
Routine can dull anything and this could be a part of or all of what you are experiencing. What Julie75 has suggested will break some of the routine; talking with your partner and finding out his feeling will help.