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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!

advice

16 yr old Female, UK
My Music teacher is 49. I am 16. I help out in some of his lessons, for younger years. We talk all the time. He tells me funny little stories about his family, and he tells me about his difficult past, personal stuff... but he has always seemed such a closed off man.

He calls me Professor Jane (Jane is not my name, but I don't want to put my name on here), and I call him by just his last name (like smith, rather than Mr. Smith)

I resently left school (year 11) and he wrote a funny limerick about me (teasing me) in my leavers book, and I know he didn't write in anyone elses. He gave me his number, in case I needed it for my exam revision.

We argue, like allot, over all sorts of silly stuff. Like, the other day, we argued about the best Dr from Dr who, and its like real arguing.

He tells me stuff about the school, like stuff about private teachers meeting. I consider him a very good friend.

I suppose this is not a question, more a situation, and I would like your opinions on it?

Thank you
x

Maybe you remind him of a daughter of his but you already realize how odd this relationship is. Is not the way other teachers relate to students. That is for a reason. Teachers are taught strict guidelines to follow or they can jeapordize their jobs. You may be a very mature young lady and thus attract the attention of older men. But until you are of legal age do not get involved in even an extremely close relationship with an older man because its such a fine line to moving it into an intimate romantic relationship from there.

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I got a new bra and it makes my boobs look bigger than they actually are. But I'm scared that if I take it off ppl will think I was faking having big boobs but I really wasn't trying to. What should I do?

My daughters without a push up had girls telling them they showed off too much cleavage. They were dressed decently, not too low cut. The girls were secretly jealous or believing some religious stuff about what is decent or not. My daughters asked what I think. Find out what other adult women think because your peers may not have enough world experience yet to know what is really a worrisome issue or not.

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I'm a boy ,16, she's 17 and a grade higher.
I've known her since 2010, and we had a lot of things in common (like a love of manga and anime), and I knew immediately that I wanted to be her friend. Around the end of 2010, I started having feelings for her (NOT sexual), and they've steadily gotten stronger. We eat (during the school year) together at lunch, but don't get to hang out outside of school or school activities.
Even though we don't get to spend much time together, I treasure each moment, and try to make time. I can't get her out of my head, it's a bit scary. I dream about her, sometimes, and I've stayed up all night tonight (it's daylight now) thinking about her, trying to decide what to do. I don't want to lose her friendship, but these feelings inside me are just ripping me apart, I can hardly stand it. I only have 5 friends, and none of them are very close to me, aside from her. She is my best friend, and I love her. I don't think she feels the same way, though, and if I were to confess my love to her, I believe I would be turned down. I don't want to lose her as a friend, but things would be too awkward after that for things to be normal, especially if she knew exactly just how I felt. It's not that she wouldn't want to be my friend, still, it's just that it'd be too weird for things to just go back to normal. On the last day of school, I told her I'd like to keep in touch over the summer, we exchanged phone numbers. I haven't called her yet, and wouldn't know what to say if I did. Remember, I really don't think she feels this way about me, and yes, while I know that I may look back and say "I wish I would have...", I also don't want to regret what I say.
Please help me. I'm starting to freak myself out a little bit with this multitude of feelings for her. Back in 2010 I asked her if she wanted to go do something sometime, but she told me she couldn't because of her siblings (and she does have lots of younger siblings) needing to be watched after school, and I believe her, though there's the chance that she just turned me down. I've heard her say, before, that she wants to wait until all of her schooling is done before she bothers with relationships, though I don't know if she meant it or not. I wish I could read minds, it would save me so much trouble.
Just please help me out, I don't know what I should do about this, and please try not to tell me something that will end up in pain. I'm sorry for all the reading I put you through for this.

Since she has expressed wishes to wait for any dating relationship until she is out of school it is best to honor her wishes, no matter how strong you feel about her. It is not a cop out. I left it up to my daughters to date in high school or not but told them to pay close attention to how the girls who were in and out of relationships were doing on their grades. They noticed the grades werent as good for girls into heavy dating because their focus was elsewhere so none of the 3 of them ever chose to date in high school. Looks like your best friend has chosen the same thing. Since shes a year older, Let her know how you feel after she has graduated and see if she will date you then.

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Is it totally wrong that I think my cousin is super funny and that I do find him attractive? How do I deal with this? What does this mean?

Like everyone else, you have eyes in your head and you will see things that you like throughout life but are not available for you to go after such as male cousins, other male family members, girl friends dads, and as you are older, married men.
Nothing wrong with liking what you see.
Make a mental note or even diary entrys of what you like in a guy...in looks, in personality traits.
these are the kinds of things you will look for in a mate someday. So if you like that he is funny, write down you like a guy with a good sense of humor.

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me and my sister are 3 1/2 years apart. she's sixteen. we used to get along a little until she was 11. I always try to talk to her but she tells me not to touch her and leave her alone. I can't talk to her about anything and the only time she wants to talk to me is when she wants me to keek with her and take a picture with her so she can act like we're the best sisters. we always fight about really stupid stuff and when my mom isn't here and were with our grandparents my nana always takes her side so if we fight ill get in trouble and get grounded and nothing will happen to her. she always gets her way and they never pay attention to me. I don't like that we fight because me friend and her sisters are like best friends and they talk about everything and they're 6 years apart! or 5. what should I do? should we see a therapist? but my parents might think it's not a big deal and it's stupid.so any ideas?

What you and sis are experiencing is normal. Teen girls going through hormonal changes will find they cry more easily, get angry more easily and just bicker over unimportant random stuff. Let mom know this is happening in case she has been out of touch and not paying attention. For anyone to take sides between two hormonal teen girls is not a fair thing to do. No matter if you started something or she did, the other can try to exercise self control and not be goaded into reacting. So either way I see it, both of you would need someone willing to be a fair referee. Talk to mom. Ask her to help you both. And both of you must talk without fighting and promise mom that you will drop whatever emotional thing you were going through the moment she points it out. Eventually as you both grow older you will be on good terms again. It's a temporary thing but get mom involved. She's been there too.

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Hello! I am 14 years old, and a few weeks ago i met a really cute girl (my age) and i asked her for her number and she gave it to me. we talked for a few weeks and we got really close and i told her she was really pretty and she thought i was cute. i asked her one day if we could dance and then somehow, we ended up talking about kissing after dancing. Two days ago she told me she liked me, and i told her i liked her too but we didnt date. Recently, she cancelled dancing and hanging out. I'm not really sure what happened but i'm really confused. I feel really bad, as if it'S my fault because she wont talk to me now and i feel like i must have crossed the line somewhere but im not sure where. I've been nothing but nice to her. ANY HELP WOULD BE AMAZING! THANK YOU!

You guessed it when you wrote the words "Mixed signals"
You showed the interest with asking for her number. Did you ever call her by the way? You show interest by telling her she's pretty, asking her to dance and kissing her after. That is not the actions of a guy and girl who are just friends at school.

I believe she was expecting you to ask her to be your girl, to date you, go out with you. So she gave you 2 days and since you had not asked yet, told you she liked you. But you did not ask her to start dating you. You did not cross the line what you had already done, you just didn't go far enough.
Go talk to her. Tell her you are new at this kind of thing and don't know how to go about asking a girl out and you're sorry if you hurt her feelings but that she is the only girl you are interested in dating so could she forgive you. Something like that should put everything right. If not, perhaps there is another problem and you will have to ask what that is.

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I need to make it clear out the above question...

this is the sexual position where both partners can give each other oral sex at the same time. This can be done with either partner on the bottom. The one on top straddles their partner with their head facing the partners genitals so their own now hover over their partners face. Or you can do a version of this lying on your side.

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Hi, I'm 18 Female, and also English is not my first language. Well, this is something that really bothers my mind for weeks now, I have a long distance relationship for almost 3yrs now. I gave my life to him make him feels that I'm just right beside him, makes myself perfect even though I'm not and give all the love and support that I can give, let's say I have given my very best and all I can offer to him, I love him so much, he's the reason why I have to live in this world but these weeks I can feel that something is wrong, something not right, we haven't met, no never only calls and social networks but I do love him so much so I now I can feel that he is lying and whenever I have to interrogate him or confront him about what I feel he's really good in answering and also I love him so I have to trust but I can't keep off of my mind that he's still lying he told me he's enrolled in a school I googled that school and found out that the course that he told me was not in that school, second he told me that he's in the varsity of that school it's summer and almost everyday they have training for about 8am to 8pm which is not normal and awkward that's the things that made me doubt him every night he always shouted at me on phone always mock a fight with me and whenever he does that all I do is to cry and beg so that he won't do it again but he still doing it, I ask him if he lives me, if there is other girls than me, he's always answer is "you only, if I had some other girls here why should I have to call you? To text you?" and I just shut up but still, I can feel that something is not right and I don't know how to figure it out :( What should I do now? :( I'm so scared :(

Yes, I believe that even in a long distance or strictly online and phone calls only with a guy that a connection can be established where you can feel and pick up things from the other. I have experienced that twice.
It's not just what you are feeling but You already have proof that he was lying about something that shouldn't be a thing to lie about. I am sure it didnt matter to you what school he was going to and other details. Another thing that doesnt make sense is a person who gets a thrill out of starting a "mock fight' as you described it. And every night? You are not being honest with yourself. There is no "make believe" or pretending with his fighting if it brings you to the point of tears. It's hard to let go of someone your heart still has a connection to when he is mistreating you and lying to you. I have experienced that too. 1st marriage. Thats why it took me 30 yrs to wake up and leave him. Part of it is insecurity of moving one like...will i ever find anything better? Dont let that thought keep you in a relationship that weakens you and brings you down instead of strengthening you and building you up.

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I've know this guy for almost a year, we used to talk pretty often and hung out a few times. Were both attracted eachother and we hunting about 2 weeks ago and he stayed the night. While we were in bed we started making out and stuff and I told him I wasn't going to have sex with him (because there were other people in the next room) but we continued anyways. He wanted me to give him a blowjob instead of "leaving him hanging" but I didnt want to so I gave him a handjob instead. Since then we've only texted a few times and he always seems busy, his replys are short and really spaced out. Was he just using me and now he's dropping me because he didn't get what he wanted? I'm interested in him but I just feel like I'm bugging him when I text him.

18/f

I can't enjoy myself fully when I have to be quiet because others might hear. If its roommates in another room eventually with the right boyfriend, taking your time, you may become more used to doing things knowing others were near by but not in the same room. But thats something that may come over time.
If he was an understanding sensitive man, he would have cared more about your feelings than what you could do to get him off. Guys always have their hormones raging and sex on their minds. That is not going to change not even when you're decades older. At my age if a male friend gets overly focused on trying to even just talk about sex, he tells me to slap him back in place so to speak. They respect that I am married. Men will find their "little head" getting temporary control of the conversation over the "big head."
Don't give in to anything that makes you uncomfortable. Put a guy back in his place and see which ones disappear and avoid you and which ones stay. The ones who stay simply need to be told what your boundaries are, how you like to be treated and they are more likely to do so. the ones who left like yours did, are not good boyfriend material, period!

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16F (my boyfriend is 16, too)

My boyfriend and I have been going out for about 4 months now. For the most part, our relationship is going well. There is one problem, though. Whenever we're standing next to each other, even if we're in school in front of our teachers, he'll lean over and wrap his arms really tightly around my chest. It always makes me feel super uncomfortable, especially because every time I have to lift his arms over my head to get him off of me.

Now, I understand that a lot of people might like this kind of thing, but I feel like he's not respecting my personal space and it's really embarrassing. I'm not sure why he does this, and he's almost knocked me off of my feet several times. He's a lot bigger than I am and there's really not much I can do, physically. I try to politely tell him to stop, but when he doesn't listen, I can't bring myself to yell at him and tell him off in front of everyone. It would be humiliating for both of us.

How can I make him stop hugging me like this and start respecting my space? And does anyone know why he feels the need to do this? Thanks in advance!

I agree with adviceman that he sounds like he is "marking his territory". There could be more to it though. You said you politely asked him to stop. Your words along with body language while trying to not make a scene, may have sent him a totally different message than you intended. He may actually think you like it and only protest quietly to still seem a prim and proper female. His actions sound kind of controlling to me. But then again, he could be clueless that this is not acceptable behavior.

How to get this to stop is to have a talk with him not when he is doing it, but at some time when he is not, when you have the privacy to talk it out. Let him know how it makes you feel. You have a right to your personal space. You have a right to be with a partner who listens to your concerns and will respect them and NEVER embarrass you in public. Bring it to his attention that you notice it only in public where others can observe him doing so. Let him know it makes you feel like he's an animal marking his territory. Let him know you are not territory, you're a person with feelings and that if he does not stop, you will have to break up with him until he comes to his senses. You have to be willing to do that though because if you dont, it's as useless as telling a child they will get sent to their room if they don't follow the rules, and when they break the rules, they never get sent to their room. They believe you're not serious, and will keep testing you until you finally come through with your threat.

So have the guts to mark the boundaries with him. Tell him what the consequences are if he steps over the boundaries and DO follow through with those consequences!!! He might be tempted to test you and do it again to see if you will break up as you said.
If it comes to that and being stronger, he stalks you around school to continue to pester you and attempt to hug you in attempts to get you back, you can't let him bully and control you that way. The women who are weaker in standing up for themselves tend to end up picked on by men. Those who don't fear making a scene are not controllable by a guy. Just consider ahead a very slight possibility that you might have to say something out loud in front of others or ask for help from others if you feel fearful or threatened ever at any point. Ultimatums work well. Example: I will count to 3 and if you have not let go of me by then and backed away, I will yell and scream for help and i will tell school officials that i broke up with you and you are still not respecting my wishes. It will be your own fault if you feel embarassed and get in trouble. Imagine if you saw a guy being rough with his girl on school grounds and she looked scared and turned to those watching and said, "Somebody get help, he's stalking me and I am scared." Chances are he will back off quickly as he sees you and others go to alert school staff. How would you feel about that girl? Should she feel embarassed she had to ask for help? You may even had thought her kind of brave to ask for help in public. Thats actually pretty cool. The guy was definately not cool. She would've gained your respect...not your pity. Same will happen to you if you end up having to make a scene. Other girls may learn to stand up to guys who are mistreating them as well, they will respect you. Many may wonder at the details of how this came to be and may guess at your situation and stories can go around. Easiest way to stop this is satisfy their curiousity and tell me a little, enough that they realize that boundaries must be respected and then turn the tables on them, asking if any have boyfriends who don't respect their wishes. In successfully coming through a trying, embarassing time of your own, you may end up a good example to other girls.

I think that right now the stats are that 1 in every 3 teen couples have a female who is being mistreated to the point of verbal and physical abuse.

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I was on the microgestrin birth control and on the second month I was taking it my period came for the entire month until I stopped taking the pill and I haven't seen my period as yet for the month of may...could I be pregnant or is my body trying to get back to its normal flow??
my period because I keep track
04/12/2013-04/12/2013
04/17/2013-05/03/2013

Is this your first time on birth control? Every woman is different. Some bodies have crazy reactions to hormonal birth control and others don't. The hormones whether in pill form, the shot, or the Mirena IUD all work to do the same thing...trick your body into thinking it is pregnant so that you do not ovulate. This messes with how your body was naturally meant to be and confuses the body. Once coming off hormones, your body is confused and it takes a while to get back to normal cycles again.

If you've been sexually active all the way through and your body did not have enough chance to adjust yet to taking the pill and then not, yes there's always a slight chance you could be pregnant. A simple pregnancy test will tell.

For the future: If you want to avoid a hormonal contraceptive, condoms is lowest choice on my list..too many things can go wrong. Along with that is the Diaphragm which you must insert correctly each time and use a spermicide along with. So much trouble and messy and theres still a chance to get pregnant using it...i got pregnant using one. That only leaves the copper IUD not the one called Mirena...that has hormones. Read up on how the copper works. I also used the copper IUD. It was very effective, Trouble free. Read up on line about contraceptives. Don't just read what the Drs and pharmaceuticals have to say, read the many posts by women using different contraceptives and their stories of side effects.
I wish you the best in finding something that works best for you

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15/f I am a virgin and before I went to the gyno a few weeks ago I made sure I shaved but then later on I got a bump near my vjj and it hurt and it felt like a ball of puss or something like it wasn't a little in grown hair and touched it and put a little pressure on it and it popped and blood came out, this happened twice and now its swollen and it hurts when I walk. how can I make this go down completely? any at how remedies? maybe it got infected or something I don't know I haven't gone in chlorine or anything like that. thanks

Obviously, it's not going to go away on its own. Smothering it with ointments may hinder rather than help it heal. This area of the body is more sensitive than others and will hurt like the dickens for something small and minor. You didn 't
mention pus, just blood. So its hard to know if its infected but your best bet is to have a Dr. look at it.
That said, until you see the Dr. you might want to wear looser fitting clothes. The friction of movement and walking is bad enough on a sore down there without the added friction of clothing. So switch to a skirt or dress, try wearing no panties with a dress so nothing is touching it but air and your own skin of legs.

Don't put off seeing the Dr. I have once a yr outbreak of herpes and the couple little bumps that eventually burst are filled with watery blood, no pus. My entire stage of healing time is about 10 days. Some people get it way worse.
Not saying you have it but even a virgin can have it. It can be passed on by a parent who got the mouth sores herpes and wasn't visibly sore at the time the child got a kiss. a Person can carry the virus in their bodies and never have an outbreak. Then when infected person gives oral sex, it is passed on. So many variables and thats why the statistics guess at one out of four people have it. Dont want to scare you hon. it may not be that but its better knowing so you know how to properly handle if it is.

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So, I'm 15 and my boyfriend is 16.
We met on a teenage chat site and started talking, afterwards I snuck and call him from my house phone (I was on punishment at the time and not suppose to have boys calling or call them)
After a while he said we wanted to know what I look like so, I was scared of if he's think I'm ugly so I sent him a picture of my really pretty cause instead.
He said she was BEAUTIFUL and he send me a picture back, and now I wanna let him know how I really look but he said the only reason why he really really loves me is because I'm honest but I'M NOT, I LIED :( I'm so scared to tell him but its eating me alive.

What do I do, my parents don't even know I talk to him everyday, they think I'm talking to my best friend.

Put yourself in the reverse scenerio...how would you feel if a teen in chat send you a pic of his cousin who is tall cus he thinks he's too short.
Im using height issue cus thats one thing some guys worry over and lie about. So he never tells you and you meet face to face and you feel angry and betrayed because he lied and he was still taller than you and it was acceptable to you but now you worry he might lie about other things and so you dont trust him enough to continue relationship.

Now imagine he is scared to tell you he lied but he still does write and tell you online before you meet. You'd wonder why he did that if honesty was so important to him. He tells you he thinks he's not tall enough of a guy and gives his height. You are surprised, and tell him you don't think that is short at all. So you have a chance to forgive on line and re-establish trust before meeting in person.

Which scenerio has the better outcome?
I think you know what you must do and do it quickly!

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Hey :) i really like my best friend, and we have known each other for about 3 years now, but i am too scared to risk losing this friendship. I dont know whether i should go for it or try and get over him. I tried getting over him many times, but seeing him in school everyday make it that much harder! help!

I think you already know the outcome of your idea of trying to get over him and yet continue to be such close friends.
Those things you like about him, his facial expressions, his smile, his humor, the stories he tells, etc...that will all be there like flashing neon signs you can't ignore. So you know there is no continueing this friendship with him and trying to squash those stronger romantic feelings. If the draw is that strong...theres probably a good explanation.
Theres a saying that some people come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. You won't know what you will learn or how you will be blessed if you focus all your energy on avoiding this strong feeling of being drawn to him. Just ask him. If too chicken in person, then ask him on Facebook or in a notecard but I suggest the face to face. As your good friend of 3 years, even if he didn't feel romantically drawn to you, he likely will feel very complimented that you asked. After that much time passing, if other girls havent drawn his interest yet, I'd say theres a good chance the feelings might be mutual.
I say Go For It!

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Okay so just warning, this will probably end up being long so please bare with me..
About 5 years ago, My mom had started being with a new guy and he has 3 kids. A girl who is now 13 and 2 boys who are around my age 21&22 (I'm 22 as well).. well with the two boys were their best friend,and my (stepdad) the guy my mom has been with, had know his son's best friend since he was born! So they had been pretty close considering they all knew eachother since birth. . Well these new people had came into my life.. and overtime I could say my stepdad and my siblings and their best friend also became a close friend of mine.. he was always at my house... we were all super tight. Well soon after i met (the best friend of my brothers, we'll call him Ry, who is my ex now) he started being with someone .. which was completely fine because I never looked at him like that at that time... he had been with this girl for like 4years. And they had a son together almost 2 years ago.. which was also fine.. we were all close and we all accepted that.. well Ry had already broken up with her a few times because he was just NEVER happy with her, would say how she's just bland and negative all the time and he just was not happy with her. Then last year in october, my family and I all went to a company picnic at an amusement park and along came Ry.. the night we all went home to my house and werr just chillin, he like spills out how he's felt about me for so long and could just never tell me because of his babymom and jus spilled his heart out to me saying hes always wanted me but thought i was beyond out of his league. I had never known how he felt all this time! I was trippin. He ended up leaving her.. in hopes of being with me. We had talked and hung out and the more we did, the more i started to realize i have feelings for this guy.. and i never knew it til then...And i would always say how this would have to take time and we both agreed. But as the days and literally just HOURS that went by with us we just completely fell for eachother. Head over heels. He ended up living with me n my fam because they had already known him for years.. so since the company picnic happened, it was only a week after that that we started talking.. he was here all the time so he jus ended up living here.. my family and I all accepted that he had a kid and him being with their daughter (me) .. we only were together for 1 MONTH! but knowing him all those years before and how I felt jus about him as a person, it didn't matter.. we fell in LOVE. we did everything together. I mean he lived with me! And we'd see his son 3 days out of the week becauae it was split between him and the mom depending on their work schedules... and I cared and catered to that little boy, I opened my heart to him and accepted that my boyfriend had a kid. I was fine with everything... well the last few days of our relationship we started kinda arguing a bit. About STUPID, overcomeable stuff.. buuuut. He wanted to leave.. he saId if we were arguing this soon in, then how bad will it be years from now.. and I would say how relationships take work and time and we can fix this... that's all I wanted to do... he jus left. And he never truly gave me a reason... 3 days later was thanksgiving... I found out he was back with his babymom. I was devestated but quickly it turned to anger and hate and I destroyed everything that reminded me of him.. and told myself to forget him.. after all, I'd probably neverrr everrr see or talk to him again in my life...last thing i said to him was that i HATED HIM and said mean things cuz i was hurt..well 2months after, I find out he got her pregnant again! And I just laughed... whatever floats their boats right? Im sitting here thinking oh they got their little happy family and everythings obviously good with them...i had forgiven him for everything. He didnt know that. But within myself i forgave him because it was the only way i could heal. And i dont hate anyone so it was eating at me that that was the last thing i said to him.. well now its been 6 months since our breakup and ive been totally fine, not ever thinking about him or being sad. I erased him in a way because im like hes with her thats what he wants. Well my brother hadnt talked to Ry since everything... until 2 nights ago! Ry went to my bros house and just spilled out everything with how hes feeling... regret, stress, pain, tears, unhappiness . And how he just wants me back more than anything. And how he had everything when he had me and he's been so unhappy with his babymom but the reason he left was because he felt it was right to go be a family with her and their son.. but then got her pregnant like right away!and they found out at 2 months and everything just started hitting him like crazy, his mind started racing and going crazy about me all the time.. he would look up my instagram on google, listen to our old songs. And jus say how he F'd up sooo bad and nows he's just F'd and he doesn't know what to do because he's not happy with her at all and he doesn't know why he did what he did to me and hes been trippin on all of this for 4 months now.. I was shocked... I mean 6 months of nothin. . Then bam... this. And it brought up all these feelings that I didn't know I could feel ever again... I thought that part was llong gone. I haven't been mad at him for all this time and i haven't hated him and its like I should right? I mean he's coming back to me now after all this time with a 2 year old boy and a girl on the way... telling me how bad he needs me and how much hes sorry and how hes never stopped thinking about me and that he thought he was doin the right thing leaving me for his family but realized he shoulda worked it out with me and things wouldnt be as bad as they are now and that all he wants is for me to b his girl again and he would fight n fight and he jus sounded so broken... i mean youd think that allll of me would be like TOO BAD ITS WHAT YOU GET, and jus forget him all together but why can't I ? Its like allll this time I thought he wasn't thinking of me at allll and jus forgot me, all to find out the complete opposite. .. now in jus lost and confused.. because there's still a part of me that wants him .. but now he has TWO kids! Not one but TWO. like that second kid is the only thing that holds me back from wanting to be with him....I have no idea what to do! I can't even talk to my family about it because they have noooo idea I've even thought about Ry and have talked to him. They'd probably disapprove of how I feel completely and jus think I'm stupid and dumb if I wanted him still. Mainly because he has another kid on the way... I can see them accepting it all if there wasn't another kid on the way.. and its hard for me to as well... like that second kid is the onlyyyy thing holding me back. I keep tellin myself like noo you can't.. how could youu. He has aNOTHER kid coming... how could it ever work... but there's still that part that wants him... I mean I'm a 22 year old woman and have no kids of my own and the person I woulda done anything for now has 2 ! And he wants me back.. like what do i do? :( . I'm not bein a homewrecker either. And never did when we first dated. They had aalready broken up and he was jus supposedly done with her... when he first got back with her after me he was set on jus bein a family and sticking it out n never leaving but realized shortly after that's realky not what he wanted at all but knowin he has a kid on the way he's jus been stuck. I know I shouldn't even talk to him and put myself thru all that again but my heart is jus heavy and its so easy to cry and that's crazy because I haven't cried bout him in 6 months and he just comes back in my life and instantly I cry.. its showing me that I'm truly not over him.. and I thought I was because I just hadn't talked to or seen him.. but how do i accept 2 kids now... and our families im sure disapprove completely.. I just don't know what to do. And I've just been crying ever since I got a phone call from my brother telling me that Ry isn't doing good and that he kept saying he misses me and he messed up bad. My mind is totally twisted! I hhave nooo one else to talk to about this. I don't know what I'm doing or feeling or how to handle this.. it's killing me.. I miss him sosooo much :(

Girl I know how you feel, been there done that.
I had a guy just like that, he'd actually been divorced a couple times. When similar stuff happened that I would not tolerate I decided to forgive and got over him...only to find out later from mutual friends how miserable he was without me, moping around, depressed, missing work because of it and so on.

So I naturally thought as you might be thinking, wow that a good sign that he really does care about me! So my heart softened up and I allowed him back in my life. End result, it was only another spin on the same Merry go Round...same old stuff, same old fighting.
What changed for me that might help you sort it out?
A friend told me, You have to learn to really love yourself enough to not hang around people who bring you down or 'weaken' you. It is not a selfish thing to think of your needs first because ultimately no one else is looking out for you or has a say either way.
It could simply be that as nice a guy that he might be, his lesson to learn in this lifetime might be a simple one of learning how to recognize and choose the right person for a mate.
It wasn't rosy with her and it didn't work with you. Not that there anything wrong with either of you ladys that needs changing...you'll be both perfect for the right guy. Obviously he isnt it for either of you. So don't join the drama and end up pregnant as well with a kid of his while he goes off to explore a half dozen or more relationships or whatever it takes until he learns what he's doing wrong, discovers himself and what woman would match him best and then finally does it right. He may be a slow learner. Your heart will feel the connection to him for some time but don't mistake the tug on your heart as meaning that you are meant to be together. You also will be learning how to discover who you are at core and what kind of man will complement you best. My oldest daughter at 27 has been divorced twice in her quest to discover who is right for her. now in her 3rd love relationship. Don't fear the learning process to finding the right one, for there will be the failed relationships to dot your past in your learning process. The sooner you learn the less of those processes you'll have to go through. I know you will see the guy sometimes because he is friends with your bros but the learning process isnt supposed to be easy. It is through the hard, harsh and difficult situations that we have opportunity to be strengthened and grow. Good luck sweetie

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Ok so I had sex with this girl and I wore a condom and I didn't ejaculate inside her. She is a week late for her period and I'm freaking out! And the pregnancy test came up negative. And she also said she sort of had a period but just for like a day that confused me too. Help!!

For the future, I will add that if you and her become pretty regular sex partners...she may want to check out some other form of birth control. Now that you know how it feels to wonder if theres pregnancy or not, going through that every time is a big killer on romance for both of you.
If she's old enough, she does need parents ok and can just see the local Planned parenthood.

Some teens do not have regular periods for quite a while. To have a good one for 3-5 days and next month only one day or even just spotting for a week is normal or as in my case, the space in between might be longer or shorter than usual and my period lasting almost 2 weeks because it was so slow. I grew up to have a normal cycle and birth 3 children.
Good luck.

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how do i tell my mom my hymen broke


What causes you to believe your Hymen broke? Hymens are not something that fully covers the vagina and so do not need to be broken. They need to be stretched which can happen with use of tampons,
sex toys and your own fingers inside.

If you had sex for the first time and felt pain or saw blood...then it wasn't being done correctly. A female must be well aroused in foreplay and wet before entered and the male must enter slowly so the hymen can slowly stretch. This may mean holding his position at only an inch inside until you say, go a little more.

You don't have to tell mom anything. If you both have always been close and shared about anything and everything and she's very open minded and sex positive and you want to tell her, then tell her.

But it is best that you get educated first about your situation so you can figure out if there is anything to be concerned about or not.

I recommend a gal who is one of your peers on youtube with a sex positive and relationships channel. watch this episode and check out the rest.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qFojO8WkpA

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If you take day after pill what couse you to dont have children even you are not useng them?

The day after pill works no matter what birth control method you were or were not using. YOu can buy it at your locat pharmacy...ask the pharnacist or obtain it from Planned parenthood.

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What is swag?
I rate 5s and i rate high :)

Best I can tell from research on urban slang dictionary on line is that it is an acronym, each letter standing for a word.

The first listed is "secretly we are gay"

next: "saved with amazing grace" Christian themed so if you are not part of that crowd, safe to assume this isn't whats being refered to.

Swag could be short for swagger: The appearance of being very cool, smooth, looking good, dressing nice and often having lots of money to flash which draws them the attention of others. A way of carrying yourself like a star.


Whether its how you rated on a poll you chose to take, or how your peers rate you, it does not matter. What counts is "how do you see yourself" and is that the person YOU are happy and confident for now being? We also change through life so who we are now, may change greatly or subtly to who we become in the future.

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How i can fake my virginity


There is NO NEED TO FAKE VIRGINITY because there is NO WAY TO PROVE VIRGINITY. Let me explain:

I assume you are a female since all the movies and novels make a big deal of seeing a show of blood on the sheets of a bed as proof that a woman was a virgin at time she had sex with her husband on marriage night. This is a great misconsception. There is no reason to feel pain or for a show of blood unless the male doesn't know how to do it right. The hymen stretches over time so going slowly and using lube helps the hymen to adjust, even the first time.

In days of old, there was no such thing as tampons and dildos which stretch the hymen. No lube either and men obviously did not take it slowly or try to arouse the female first with foreplay so shes good and wet before slowly entering. Nope, they just rammed it in dry and that of course would rip some of the tender flesh inside bringing a show of blood as well as screams of pain from the female.

So todays females with use of tampons, checking on some contraceptives placement, have their own fingers inside slowly over time stretching out the hymen not to mention if she used vibrators and dildos before having sex the first time.

End result, there is no need to fake virginity because there is no way to prove virginity.

If a guy assumes you are not a virgin because your
vagina doesn't feel like a certain tightness that he imagined in his head, then he is very uninformed and needs some educatin.

Don't just take my word for it. Watch this sex positive video (Link below) on hymens done by Laci Green who has many relationship and sex related topics to share with her peers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qFojO8WkpA

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