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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!
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Its difficult. Because he acts like he likes me. He has the body language and the way he talks. But then he has the attitude like a good guy friend. He is in no way gay I'm 100% sure of that. Hes just so wishy washy with me. Because he's acting interested. Then acting friendly. Then he's telling my friend he can't be with me cause we drive eachother insane. And have different morals. Then he's kissing me. I thought maybe he's just been screwed over so much so he's being that guys that doesn't care about anything ie. Feelings,emotions,life, relationships. Hes completely poured everything about his life out to me one night and he's been through a bunch. No family homeless back and forth through friends couches screwed over by girls and everything. I'm not trying to start a relationshipwith him because I'm confused on my feelings for him but I do know that he is very sweet but has a front. Like a touch don't give a shit front. And that pushes people away.
Sorry to hear he's had bad experiences. Some of us overcome our terrible past and are stronger for it, being overcomers.
Others merely survive the experience but it affects their qualilty of living life fully.
No one can make a Survivor decide to change into an Overcomer. there is help available counseling but more so inner strength from a higher source, angels, god but not many reach out.
Your feelings could be tied to natural maternal desires to nurture. It doesnt have to be a little child, the need to nurture can come out in gardening, or in helping out an adult.
His front is there to keep him from being hurt again but it also keeps out those who may want to love them.
I knew a couple where the female in 50s used to grow up with alcoholic dad who beat the kids all the time. She married to escape home. The man she married was a counselor by trade. He told me he worked his entire life trying to help her get past the damages of the past. She had a wall up around her heart that didnt even allow him to be as close as he could possibly be. Eventually as he neared 60, he wrote that he couldnt take it any longer not being able to be accepted fully in her heart and divorced her. Who knows what will happen for your friend. But it would be good to keep in mind what he said about driving each other crazy. That is a mismatch not only in marriage or long term relationships but in friends. there may be no bad trait in you but it is foreign to how he is. My example: I am a very talkative person and I have seen how some guys did not like that trait in me...they wanted someone more quiet. So I kept looking. I was not about to bottle up everything inside and not talk. When you do those kinds of things, it makes your life energy stagnate and you can run into medical issues over it and diseases in the long run. All from not being yourself, changing to please or match someone. I now have a wonderful husband 2nd marriage, who is as talkative as I am so we dont drive each other crazy! Good luck dear. I wish you all the best.
is it really a turn on for a guy to know that you keep your legs closed
Every guy is different as to what turns him on. Some younger guys are turned on only by seeing older females, way older. Some prefer huge boobs, others like thin, some want overweight women, some are turned on by viewing womens feet and the list goes on. If you are the female, and a guy wants you to be a certain way to turn him on, tell him to go find the gal who is already like that.
Don't ever change who you are to take care of a guys sexual fantasies and turn ons if it is not you or something you are comfortable with.
If you are the guy, wanna know what is just as important as what turns you personally on? Its what turns on the female. Young guys want to rush in like a bull in a china closet and boop...quick its over. She is not satified. If you are the guy, do your research now online. Learn about clitoral stimulation by finger or tongue, and also g-spot orgasms. I checked the other day, and there is enough on line for you to view to even learn kissing 101. If a guy can learn how to take his time with and learn how to give mind blowing orgasms to a girl, she won't want anyone but you and the reputation will go around and guy will come to you asking you what you do so they can please females too.
that is more important than whether her legs are closed or not.
So back in May my boyfriend and I broke up. I've gotten over him and now have a new boyfriend. I sent him a friend request back a few weeks ago on Xbox but he declined. We go to the same church but I don't go there often. I really want to be his friend again and I know he might too. How can I work this out. (he has a new gf btw and I just want to be his friend)
You broke up May and it's July. It hasnt been long. Give yourself more time to get over him. If he has a new girlfriend and you're insisting on forcing contact causes him to lose his current girl, then he will not be happy with you at all, it could even be anger he has toward you. You could also endanger your new relationship.
A relationship doesnt 'grow' itself. If you want to be happy with your current guy, then remember this,
"Happily ever after doesnt happen just because you wish it so. It only happens when both people put in maximum effort to make it so."
You won't be able to do that if half your focus is still on the last guy. Tell your self it is over and move on.
Does it hurt when you have sex for the first time and your boy freind or whoever you are having sex with have a huge dick and you have a tight pussy or small pussyhole
Depends on the gal and the guy. Some gals are very tight and have not stretched their hymen out yet with use of their fingers or dildos or vibrators. I suggest you start working one finger in and working up to two fingers and more and then using a dildo.
Use lots of lube. Lack of enough lubrication accounts for some of the pain. The hymen can also shrink again when years have gone by without any sex. Women who have been used to an average size length of 5-6 inches all their life, and at mid life is singe and dating guys who may be 7 + can experience pain too. Sometimes a guy is just too long and his cock will hit the cervix or to the sides of it which in me caused horrible charlie horse cramps down my leg that wouldnt stop until he stopped. Sex should be pleasurable, not painful.
Since sex ed is rarely taught anymore and those writing in today have no knowledge what so ever, not even about how one gets pregnant, what contraceptives are, how a female can achieve different orgasms...etc. But if you are willing to be self taught, I recommend a wonderful site with about 160 3-4 min videos on sex dating and relationships Its Sex plus with Laci Green.. please look it up on this link for the one on hymens.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qFojO8WkpA&list=PLTXiNEUzXWKTfNYKThSk-kmJdf7AJRP5K&index=15
I and my girlfriend had unprotective sex on 24th May 2013. There after she took i-pill immediately on that night of 24th may. She got her periods after 10 days i.e on 4th June 2013 (Which are earlier than usual). But the problem is she dint get her periods after that. Today its 17th July. Is there any chances of pregnancy. I feel its not because she got periods after having sex. I am worried and more worried is my Gf. Hoping for the earliest reply.
If she got her period after the May incident, then she cannot be pregnant from that one time, but she can if you had unprotected sex between her June period and now. I don't know what your practices are but a person can get pregnant from male sperm on your hand or hers transfered to her vagina by fingering her. The sperm is in the precum too not just ejaculate. The two of you likely have not been taught any sex ed. through school, not real quality stuff, so you will need to educate yourself.
I suggest she take a pregnancy test that can be purchased at a pharmacy to ease your minds and then quit playing Russian roulette and go with her to get her put on contraceptives at Planned Parenthood.
I know a site done by a college age gal who has studied sex on her own and with planned parenthood. She has a youtube channel called Sex plus with Laci Green. I suggest the two of you view all her videos and get yourself better educated. You will end up also enjoying better sex in the end. there's a second site of her videos connected to Planned parenthood. The vids are all 3-4 min long and very entertaining, even for someone old enough to be her mom. Here they are:
http://www.youtube.com/user/lacigreen
http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWPjR59a5UEjyhHM0ag7IZA
how much weight would I lose if I didn't eat for a week? (not saying I am planning on doing it so please don't give me lectures) I am actually just wondering because people always tend to say that you wont lose much and gain everything back and more afterwards. But this never happened to me. I was a little overweight for a while and lost around 20 pounds by not eating. I weighed around 132 lbs (I'm not very tall) And that was a year ago and I still didn't gain anything back. I don't really exercise either. (I know it's unhealthy, as I said please don't give me lectures) .. so why is it that I didn't gain it all back? I have changed the way I eat though, I eat normally now, before that I used to eat more than I should so maybe that's the reason? And once I felt really sad and didn't eat for 2 days and I lost around 4 pounds. I read that you'd only lose around 5 pounds if you don't eat for a week. Apparently not with me. I can feel how I'm getting thinner and thinner every day if I eat very little. I once lost 6 pounds in one week by only eating 500 calories or less a day. (and again I know it's unhealthy. I tend to go on crazy diets) But obviously the whole motabolism slowing down and not losing weight rule isn't really thaaat true right? And I dont think i only lost muscle either, cause I pretty much got rid of my flabby tummy which is most deffinetly not made of a lot of muscle :p so please don't tell me that I shouldn't go on crazy diets but rather tell me how this works and why I didn't gain anything back and why I'm able to actually lose quite a lot by starving and not gain it back. I am quite sick of the metabolsmn slowing down and not losing anything cause your body clings to everything he can get myth ._. Obviously it doesn't tend to be that way for everyone.
Fasting is actually healthy if done right for your body to do every once in a while to give your digestive tract a rest. even people who don't need to lose weight will do a cleansing fast. You will still need liquids so be sure to get lots of that. Make some of those liquids vegetable and fruit juice mixes. Theres a guy named Jack Lalanne who later in age promoted juicing fresh veggies and jucie. He was all muscle and no fat. Read his bio on Wikipedia and look up the lalanne juicers on line. Maybe expensive but you get what you pay for. And buying the already juiced stuff in a health food store is more expensive in the long run. Do not go straight off food for your fast but allow your body to go naturally into fast like cutting down on food first till you only eat one actual meal a day and the rest is healthy juices. And finally just living on the juices for the term of your fast. My husband did 14 days of fast and lost weight but he didn't do exercise along with which his body needed to lose better. But you know yourself best. I would highly recommmend getting a juicer you can afford and doing the liquid diet rather than no nutrients at all. Less shock to the body and the weight still comes off.
My question is why is he acting so wishy washy with me. Not wanting anything but kissing me when we drink and wanting a blow job if he doesn't want to have sex apparently. I've never had a guy be so back and forth with me like that.
It could be that he has no interest in sex with a girl. He could be gay and has not admitted it to himself. A gay person can have been married or tried the hetero thing but found they just don't like it.
If he has to drink to feel free enough to just kiss...something is wrong.
Getting drunk to kiss or have sex is not a good idea. It means the people are consciously forcing themselves into that position or action. Doing this goes against the position of where their subconscious mind is at. This is the mind that helps you dream, where are your feelings and emotions come from, your subconscious mind can fight what your conscious mind is forcing your body to do. Obviously he is not just shy or something but has other issues if not gay. He could have some bizarre phobia's about germs and such and needs to be next to unconscious with alcohol to force himself to go through the few motions he does.
If I were you, I wouldn't put so much effort into getting things going with him.
If I understand right you feel the need to drink too every time you hang out socially. You miss out a lot on life. You can not work hard on getting to know a person well enough to discover if they will work out for a lifetime mate. If you did luck out into stumbling accidently across a good guy, then without both people putting in maximum effort to make the relationship work while sober, then it is not going to survive. Thats life...thats how it works. If you are not ready to be serious about finding a healthy relationship and prefer to do the mindless thing for a while longer, then you will have no one to blame but yourself if you end up not happy in the future. Don't look just at this guy but look at yourself hon...we all have to do that to get success in relationship. I had to learn to really know myself and my needs and my wants and who I was at core, my fears, my strengths, before I could attract the right guy. Hopefully you dont put in 30 yrs like I did with the wrong guy and have 3 kids with him.
15/f I have been seeing this guy for awhile we are hooking up or making out but nothing more whenever we hangout. we are good friends he is 17/m and we don't want to be serious. ideally I would like to be in a relationship to lose my virginity but are relationship is great where it is. we have respect for each other and care about each other a lot and we are comfortable around each other. im not one to rush into anything quickly especially with guys and I have a hard time trusting them. it took us awhile like two months to even hookup. we are very open with each other and talk about everything, including sex and he doesn't pressure me or anything. I know he is a good guy and I just want to make the right decision. I am so mature and responsible for my age that its not that im trying to rush anything I just feel so much older and im ready. if he uses a condom and uses it correctly and everything is their really any chance of getting pregnant? if everything does go fine should I still use plan B afterwards if im not on the pill just to make sure? the only reason is I don't want to get on birth control for someone im not in a relationship with so it could just be a one time thing and I don't want it to fuck up my hormones and everything. by the way what are some things I should consider if I decide to go through with this. thanks
You could make sure to keep a kit of spermicide on hand to use for times when something goes wrong. Or if you aren't sure but want to be covered just in case, to go pharmacist and ask for the morning after pill. As long as taken the next day you should be fine.
I understand the concerns of taking hormonal contraceptives. Perhaps in 6 mos, a yr of 2 years you may be ready. Either you wait until then or find out if your doctor if okay with you having an IUD put in. These things are good for up to 10 years on some kinds, never having to come back out. One is hormonal, the Mirena, but the non hormonal one you may want to check up on on-line is the copper IUD. Something about the property of copper reacts with the lining of the uterus so fertilized eggs can not ever implant. It is carefree, there all the time, its the closest to being as effective as having tubes tied as you can get. You may not want to get it yet, but think about it for the future. You can get it put in by the family gynecologist or planned parenthood is a separate entity who can do the same.
if we used a condom and he took it off to do another rounds but sperms was still on his penis and he went into my vagina can i get pregnant
Yes you can be pregnant so go buy a pregnancy test at the pharmacy. Or better yet, get tested at Planned Parenthood and if you are not pregnant get on some birth control immediately. Its for reasons like this and others that it is best not to rely on condoms to not get pregnant. Planned parenthood doesnt turn anyone away because of age and it's private...your parents will not be informed.
i need to know what the age limit is for babysitting I rly want to do this and make money so I can get extra stuff for school and im only 12.
If you want to go the babysitting route... here's an idea. A woman called me when I had my ad up at the store for babysitting. She was looking for help after school at her daycare. A home daycare person will by law only be able to have so many little kids during the day and if she takes on a load of after school kids, then a second person is needed to watch over them. You might look for ads that say babysitting for before and after school and ask if they need help. Otherwise, check with some elderly neighbors if they need help with some odd jobs around the house.
SO I like this guy who is around 3 years older than me (I'm a Freshman and he is a Junior come this fall) and I think he likes me back, a few people say he does. But I was at a friend's house today and I told him about the boy and I said his age and he said "Don't do it" I'm really confused now, I think I might really like him and I hope he likes me back, but I don't know what to do. Is he to old for me? Please help!
You might go back to your male friend and ask for clarification. Was he concerned about an age difference. Or does he know something about the character of this guy and was warning you to stay away from him because he would mistreat you or try to take advantage of you.
Personally, I believe if you are all in the same highschool, just a different grade, there should be no problem.
The usual issues that arise is juniors and seniors finding the incoming freshman too immature in character for their tastes so the only others you are able to befriend might be sophomores.
That does not mean that some freshmen can be as mature as a senior or that some seniors can behave as immature as freshman. It's really up to the individual.
The only other scenerio I can think of is that junior/senior guys who are looking for an easy sexual conquest have a harder time with those girls in their class level who are wise and on to their schemes so they will turn to incoming freshman girl who will feel honored to have the attention of a guy. I dont know what is going on. If its two people looking at each other a lot...it is only physical attraction or pheromones right now. Until there is some real conversation between the two of you to determine if both have some things in common they like about each other, then you go on to dating to find out even more about each other. So far from how you have stated it, sounds like he isn't coming after you forcefully to win you over so he may not be a player....or he may be a very sly patient one. Ask your friend again and if its just age difference...go for it if you are interested. You need to begin learning soon how to have conversation with guys you like and discover what it is you like and dont like about guys. You will date guys over your teen/college years and hopefully be paying enough attention to learn what the good guys are like, the kind you could someday have a commited life time relationship with.
Im a 15 year old girl and always had good relationshiops with my mother.As I knew she loves playing Scrable i shown her a website to play...she loved it but as she was playng she started talking with others using that site...she is not mentioning anything personal just chat...but she has overdone it..she plays 19 hours a day and sleeps for the rest of it...she doesn't do any housework..half of my clothes are waiting to be ironed for 3 months...the only think she thinks about is the players she are talking with...she always takes my laptop and begs my aunt when i don't give it to her...if i can persuade her to pay attention to me she only says about what she was talking about playing Scrable...whenever i try controling the hours she is playing she says that she is older and can fix it herself....but she never does....what can i do?
Do you have a dad or step dad you can talk to...I'd try there for help. If you have younger siblings and they are being neglected, she may need to get some counseling. As the child, there's nothing you can do to get her to pick up her responsibilites. Talk to a school counselor and see what they suggest. Without anyone in your house to see what is really going on, no one will want to interfere. They may believe it is just a teen who is blowing things out of proportion because she is upset that mom isn't available as much as before. If you think its a real health hazard, no meals for kids and so on....I found find some adult to ask for help to come talk to your mom and see for themselves what the situation looks like at your house. Computer games can be addicting and I have read a story of a young married young who were both on line all day long ignoring their newborn baby. Crazy crap does happen. Try everyone you can think of, relatives, if your mom has any friends, if you attend church, your pastor or priest, and the school counselors. Good luck dear
I met this guy and he's really cute and funny and nice when he wants to be. And he started acting like maybe he could be interested or just interested in a hit it and quit it. Well we drank together a few times and he was flirting and brought up kissing me and if I'd kiss him back and I said why did he want to kiss me and he said cause he thought I liked him. And I played it off by saying no I don't like you why would you tjink I like you and stuff then he all of a sudden got tired and went and layed down being in a position of a guy having a fit I thought I'd go appologize. Well I ended up saying I did like him I just don't want to have feelings if he only wants sex cause that will screw everything up and he said it wasn't his top priority if it happens it happens and we just continued talking bout that kinda stuff then we kissed a bit. We layed down to go to sleep and then he left. I guess he had a panic attack and started throwing up and I fell asleep. Well the next time we drank he was being so sweet and everything and was asking for a blow job and just being real noce. And I was going to do ot but something was said that made me mad. Me and him fight like an old married couple I guess. We drive eachother crazy. Well today he was talking about how he had a panic attack and was throwing up the night I was with him and his brother said ya cause someone can't handle the truth or his feelings or something. I don't know what he meant by that. And my sister talked to him today and he told her I'm hella cool but he can't be with me in that way cause I'm too emotional (which I'm really not) and we have different morals and we drive eachother insane. She explained I'm on my period and give me time I'm cool. And if he would at least hookeup with me. And he said im hella pretty but no cause then I'd want more and she said I just wanted to have sex and he said no I want more than that. But ove come to the agreement with myself that I do just want to have sex. What does all this mean?? I'm confused by this guy. Please don't say talk to him cause I'm trying to show I'm not too emotional and I just want to know why guys do this or if he does like me and he doesn't want to waste his time or get hurt. Cause he's really negative about the relationship stuff like he's had his heart broken a few times. When were in a group he talks to everyone. But I've noticed hell constantly cross eyes with me as he's sauing somrthing or after. Some of his body language shows he's interested but I have no idea what to do. Sorry this is way long. I appologize. But I know you can help better with more detail. Thankyou
I'd really like to help hon but I got lost in all that. I don't think you made any question clear. What is it you wanted advice on?
I had a pool party but I'm on my period so my sis taught me how to use a tampon and I got home 30 mins ago and I wanted to take a shower but I wanted to take the tampon out but I can't get it out bc it hurts so much and I've been in the bathroom sitting on the toilet for about 30 mins trying to get it out without it hurting. please help me!
If it doesnt come out easily it could be that you didn't have enough flow to make it wet. When its dry, it doesnt come out as easy. You could try sitting in a few inches of water and hope the water soakes from the bottom up into tampon. Or you'll just have to forget the little string and grasp with fingers best as you can and slowly tug it out. It might have to hurt a bit but it won't damage or tear anything.
I met a guy not too long ago, and we hit it off pretty well, especially through our e-mail/texting...there was definitely some flirty flirt going on...we met in person again, and things seemed to go well, and I know I didn't put my foot in my mouth or anything...but it's been awhile now, and he ONLY texts me still, and doesn't seem interested in hanging out in person again...I don't necessarily want an actual phonecall, because I personally HATE talking on the phone, but sheesh, maybe I'm just not that impressive in person? =( Maybe it's just him? I know it may seem like an obvious answer, but I am curious to see if others have had this problem too, and if it ever turned out any differently...
Since you have an ongoing texting communication, I'd start there with stating, "It seems that there is enough mutual interest in each other with the continuous texting. So I want to know right now if you are interested enough to take this to the next level of dating? If you aren't thats okay but I want to know so I dont sit around keeping myself available for you.
You'll that my example is a very reasonable request when you hear what I say next.
How do any relationships start?
Attraction: Whether just plain looks or a pheremone attraction. It doesn't mean that either one "Likes" the other yet so it is important to go beyond the staring at stage to conversation.
Conversation: Now you are talking and find that you like the persons sense of humor,how they think, their beliefs or way of living life...this is the teaser...either you decide you want to learn more in depth about the person or you decide you don't have enough interest from convo to want to learn any more. Someone not interested stops talking to the other and looks elsewhere. If both want to learn more about the other, you start dating.
Dating: Dating is not all about calendar appointments to go to a movie or out to dinner, or out dancing. It is a time to learn what you like and dont like about the opposite sex. If there are too many dislikes, start over again with someone new. Or take this to the next level.
Steady relationship: This is meant to be a time where you have plenty of opportunity to spend in each others presence getting to see how they handle themselve 24/7 under all sorts of conditions, their good days, and bad days. Many choose to live together at this time. There isn't much that can be hidden when you live with someone, like their housekeeping habits, what their usual diet is, any mood swings, and by now there should be a good idea of what their normal sexual habits and needs are. You dont want to get matched up with someone who is the opposite libido level of yourself.
Committed relationship: Here there are vows and oaths made to each other, a professing of mutual love and devotion for each other and it goes beyond words to living it out daily in how one treats their partner. This person will be your life mate with a marriage license or without one.
Not many understand the steps to a relationship. You can't find it by observing those around you or parents, because too often many of us flounder through it all and dont figure it out until we are way older, maybe mid 40's on. So give the guy a chance. Ask and if he dodges the answering, read this step process to him and ask where he sees himself as being right now with you. If he thinks he is somewhere else than at the Conversation level....you two are not going to ever be happy together...both your perceptions are way too different. Good luck!
14/f So a couple of weeks ago I got into a fight with one of my "best friends". Now we had been really fighting a lot over the past 2 months and this time she called it quits. I had given up on her in early June after she said some nasty things about me on Twitter and basically confronted me with yelling. This past fight was about how I didn't have enough time for her (lets call her carmen)and my other friend (lets call her Tia) because Tia was moving to Stratford,Ontario and Carmen was going on vacation for the whole summer and I wasn't going to see them for awhile. However, my mom wanted to cut both of them off because Tia would always take Carmen's side and saw nothing wrong with her nasty temper and screaming.So basically whenever Carmen would call I would tell her I was busy but she would hang up on me and that angered me. And on Friday the day Carmen, Tia and I were supposed to hang out, I continously ignored their calls because when I picked up the phone the first time Carmen started screaming at me and accusing me of having no plans all week but I was actually busy. I couldn't hang out with them because I had made prior engagements with other friends. Tia and Carmen continously kept calling me so I blocked the number and Carmen on Twitter. On the car ride to the party with my other friends I got a call from a private number and was Tia and I hung up. They continously harassed me by calling to point where I had to turn my phone off. Then my other friends (let's call them Katie and Elissa) told me Carmen was tweeting some nasty things about me on Twitter and made some nasty vines about me. So Katie called Carmen back twice just annoy Carmen by using a blocked number and Carmen and Tia assumed it was me. So long story short, I am no longer friends with Carmen or Tia and I have no qualms about it because they weren't good friends in the first place AND they stalked me on Twitter. But now 3 weeks later I'm having bizarre dreams about Carmen and Tia where they're both yelling at me or something. What does it mean???
This could easily be a case of young girls going hormonal on each other. Some do it with sisters, others with friends who are close like sisters. The hormonal female teen will find her emotions out of control, she cries at the drop of a hat, gets angry easily over petty or imagined things and is really hard to live with and acts pretty immature all throughout it which could last a couple of years. Not everyone gets hit as hard with the hormonal emotional changes but all go through it in their own ways....I know, I had 3 daughters go through that.
Since all our emotions and feelings are based in our subconscious mind and thats where they come from, its easy to realize that when you dream, the subconscious mind is also in control of the dreaming and whatever is important to you, anything related to feelings can be in your dreams. Even though you have cut off and no longer associate with them, there still remained in your mind the question of why they changed from how they used to be. You mentioned the fights started over past 2 mos. so before that I assume things were pretty good, only occasional fight as the hormones began to slowly change. The unanswered question in your mind is what causes you to have the dreams. Do not be surprised to find them changing back to perfectly normal lovely people once they have gone through the worst of it for themselves. It could be a handful of months or a year before you see a change but if they begin to act mature and approach you to just say they are sorry for how they acted in the past, don't hold anything against them for it. You may even find it possible to allow them back into your circle of friends. In the meanwhile, I wish you future peaceful dreams
So my boyfriend and I broke up about 2 months ago after dating for 8 months but knowing each other for 9 years and he started dating someone else shortly after. I knew about him dating someone and it kinda made me jealous to the point where I texted him and I told him I missed him BIG MISTAKE. His gf at the time saw it and was completely immature about it. Anyway we started talking again last week and are back together. However, I don't have facebook but a friend of mine looked on his profile and it still says he's in a relationship with her. Yet we hang out all the time, he calls me on every break, and tells me he loves me and only me and realizes now that im the only one who can truley make him happy. If he was dating her still I don't know when he'd have time to? I'm so confused I don't wanna confront him cause I don't wanna seem like a stalker but it's bugging me not to know!
Most people don't understand the concept of dating and the purpose to it. Dating is only to determine if two people have enough in common to move into a relationship. Once in a steady relationship, it's no longer considered dating, it's now a relationship but the two can plan and have a 'date' night to go to movies or do something special. But a real relationship is not made up of consecutive "dates" strung together.
So in your 8 months of dating, what did you two learn about each other? You are supposed to used dating as a way to find out what you like and dont like about guys. The things you aren't willing to put up with, leave the guy and move on to learn more from the next. It is very dangerous to jump into the 1st or 2nd relationship and go for lifetime commitment. I did. It was a big mistake. I knew next to nothing from life experience yet of what I would like or not tolerate from a guy. You also need to discover more about yourself, what your needs and wants are. If after knowing this person for 9 years you feel that he would misinterpret your asking for a clarification, then the two of you don't read each other well and its a good chance you aren't meant to be in a relationship. But your tone of voice and body language is important and what you say. "Hey, I noticed you forgot to change your FB status back to me instead of Julie" with a light hearted chuckle, is much better than "Why is Julie still listed as being in a relationship with you?" Or worse, "Your FB status says you're with Julie...Are you cheating on me?" The first one, you may not get a reply to. But if the person loves and cares about you, they don't leave you to guess about it either. Once brought to his attention, the considerate loving guy would say something like, 'OMG, I didn't change that? Oh you poor thing, you probably were wondering if I was trying to date two gals at the same time. Come here honey, its you I love," and give you a big hug. Reassurance, building each other up and good communication is very important.
Perhaps that sounds like a dream guy and unrealistic. But everyone can be like that towards their partner or any friends and acquaintances if you learn how to put yourself in the other persons shoes. What must they be thinking right now, how are they feeling?
Perhaps you have some issues of your own to work out, jealousy, jumping to conclusions, etc. but only you will know if that is an issue and if so, I trust that you will work on it because you did mention the other gal as acting immature so I know you care about being mature in a relationship. I hope everything turns out alright for you.
my boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 months, he just turned 18 and I'm almost 16. before we had sex we went through all the smaller steps, which was good, and we've had sex a few times now. I'm not on birth control and I've tried to go on it for other reasons but my mom and doctor didn't think it was necessary unless I was sexually active which at the time I wasn't but now I am. we use a condom every time, I wouldn't do it any other way and neither would he. should I be taking a form of the morning after pill or something? I just don't want anything to happen. please any advice helps, thank you!
You don't have to go through mom and the family doctor to get on birth control. I dont' know if there are any medical issues for you, but I am sure Planned Parenthood could help you decide what is best for you. I would not rely on just a condom to not become pregnant. PP will see you at your age and it is confidential so the parents don't have to know. If you want a more carefree sex life without the worry, then the hormonal versions of shots, pills or Mirena IUD are choices. If you want carefree, non hormonal contraceptive, then the copper IUD is a good bet. It's worth looking into for the ease of mind.
Good luck dear
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 Months. In the beginning of June he came to me and said he wanted a break because he wasn't feeling as happy. We had so many tears and talked and talked to see if there really can be changes made. He kept saying " I feel like I met you too early because you're the woman I would spend the rest of my life with" We have did have a little break like he wanted I would say about a week. We normally see each other everyday. It was so devastating to me. I had no idea what I have done so wrong. We did talk and worked it out and pulled through. On July 4th I saw a conversation between him and his ex. Which I knew they talked but I didn't really feel comfortable. They were friends for quite sometime after and before the break up. 3 years all together I would say. I saw he was saying to her " The more and more we talk the more and more I like you" Her response she acted very surprised. But I saw this conversation occurred while he wanted a break. I brought it up to him and he said " I told her I don't think you and I should talk anymore because I don't want to hurt you anymore" But I feel Like the damage was done. Am I stupid for forgiving to some extent. Even though he said he is sorry and he said He feels so horrible for what he has done. He said he was stupid for doing any of that. He said he is now truly ready for us and to start our lives together. I love this man but am I stupid for wanting to forgive him. There was also another incident I saw him asking a co worker to hangout through text. Before all of this happened. He said he will just tell me he is at work or something to this girl. She felt like he wasn't being so faithful. I asked about that also and he tried to flip it on me that I freak out if he is talking to a girl. But now do you blame me? I absolutely am head over heels in love. I know I am. I am also scared now to rebuild this trust for the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.
You say he repeatedly told you "I feel like I met you too early because you're the woman I would spend the rest of my life with"
What kind of baloney is that?
As far as I am concerned, any time is the right time if you think you're just met the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
For him to say "too early" means he wanted more time to be single for a while. But then he wasn't single when he was married.
He can say whatever he wants so you may never know the real reason he left the ex. It could be because he decided he wasn't done living the bachelor life. He may not be the typical player always looking for a female conquest.
But if your guy thinks that if he were in a committed relationship he'd always battle a feeling that he is missing out on something, then that is a warning sign he could easily mess up and break your heart.
You may have feelings for the man which makes it harder for you to see things clearly. So ask others who know him well what they think of him and what he says about you coming along too soon. You need some perspective from those who know him better.
It is a good thing to know how to forgive. But forgiving doesn't necessarily mean staying with someone who is wishy washy. Also, it's not your job to figure out a way to make yourself trust him. He needs to earn that trust. If your inner voice is saying, I am still not comfortable with him, then no matter that you feel in love with him, the truth is you should not be with him. You can try to force the relationship but if you live every day doubting him or worrying, it will eventually build up in the end and kill your love for him or he senses how you feel and it kills him wanting to hang with you. Another warning sign is him accusing you of being the one with the issues. Only a person who is themselves deficiant in some way in their makeup is going to point at another as having a problem to take the focus off them. My ex was like that and also had mental illness. Many go undiagnosed so you dont know if that is the case with him. Whatever he is like right now will likely never improve over time because all humans are slow to change and make make no major changes at all in a lifetime. You have lots of things to think about. I hope this has given you some food for thought
I need help with my crush. I have known her for 5 years and shes shy around me. I asked her out but she never replys. But she just ends up hating me even more. It just makes things awkward. Should i give up after 5 years or keep going.
Not sure I understand right, you ask her out and she doesnt reply to that question or do you try talking to her and get not a word out of her?
Since communication is an important part of a relationship, and mutual attraction is needed, if she doenst respond either way, it might be best to move on. You will do so when you are ready