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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!

advice

im 17 n im from india now n im in realtion with a boy of 19..it has been 8mnths of our relation evrything was going good..but from the last 1 mnth we have been arguing and fighting for some or the other reason frequently..he shouts at me,gets frustated simply...
he doesnt share anything with me..or doesnt talk much..please advice me to improve my relationship..!!!!

Sometimes we will cling to a relationship that is not healthydoes he need or we are not a good match because our mind believes we won't be able to find anyone else, or be able to find someone better.
If things truly were great as you say and there were no warning signs that something was slowly getting worse, then an abrupt change in his behavior could be due to something new in his life, was there a death in the family, loss of job, stress with school, start of drinking or taking drugs? There are many things that can cause it.
Only you can truly know if it is due to both of you not having much experience with how to relate maturely in a relationship. Guys think differently than females and that can cause many misunderstandings and frustrations if both feel like they are not being understood. It takes two people to argue. You say he doesn't talk much or share things. Maybe he is the silent type and that is normal for him. In a new relationship, it is easier at first to put up with something that you don't like but it becomes a frustration you can't bear all too quickly.
You can not change behaviour that is part of who he is. If he is a quiet man who doesnt like to talk much and you are a very open person who shares information freely and is a good talker, then perhaps the best thing is to look for a guy more like you in that aspect. It will be hard to part if you choose to do so because our heart can have feelings for a person even if we fight and are not perfect for each other. But dont let that stop you if you should choose to leave him and start looking elsewhere.

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I have known my ex for 7 years. He is the father of my son. We haven't been together dating wise in 5 years. I had moved away. I moved back and he's been very active in his child's life. I love him. I think about him all day every day. He doesn't want to rush or even talk about "us" we both got out of around 4 year relationships. But he says see what the future holds. Am I wasting my breath?

Our heart and our subconscious mind will hold feelings for a person for a long time, maybe even lifelong. The real issue here is whether he is the kind of man you want as a life long mate. You broke up with him and with a second relationship.
Do you have any idea why? What is happening that needs to be addressed? Are there any growths in maturity that you need to make or he needs to make to have a successful relationship? It's usually a two way thing. Just because you have a child between you doesnt mean it's neccessarily a good idea to get back together.
Without really knowing more about you and him personally, all I can say is take care to not make any rash decisions about jumping into another relationship with him or any other for a while. Take the time to get to know yourself better, what you need and want in a guy, and how to recognize the things you don;t like in a guy. Obviously there's some of those for sure or you wouldn't have gone through two relationships already. It's okay dear, we all have to learn the hard way...same for me. But the idea is to learn from the failures in relationships. Good luck.

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I am 24 years old and I have been working as a volunteer at Free heart which is a men's drug and alchohol rehabilitation center . well there is this guy that goes there which just happens to be one of my ex's he dosn't remember me I know this for a fact because about a month ago he said nice to meet you and shook my hand and then last night he wroste me his address on a napkin and said that I could write him if I wanted to but I don't know if I could get in trouble or he could get in trouble for writing him by the manager of Free heart . I also wanted to know what yall thought about me writing this guy the whole reason I broke up with him was because he is an alcoholic but he has been improving I see that for myself he hasn't skipped any of the meeting at freeheart. my cousin who is a preacher told that he didn't see anything wrong with writing this guy because thaT is the only commincation that we are going to have with each other besides seeing each other twice a week at the mettings for like an hour that's 2 hours a week . what does everybody on here think ?

My personal gut feeling is that if someone did not remember me from about 8 yrs ago, especially someone I dated, then I was not very memorable to him. Or it could be that the entire time he was seeing you he was so drunk he couldn't remember you.
My daughters are in your age range. If you look at their pics from 8 yrs ago, you can easily tell it was them. You'd have to have changed drastically for him to not recognize you.
Before you do anything, even if it seems harmless, ask the person in charge (the manager) if it would be okay. They may have rules against writing someone or having any contact with someone in treatment, outside of the treatment program.

So the question is, Do you want to write him, really have a burning desire to do so? Ask yourself why? Is it because of a nurturing caring side your personality? IF so, keep in mind that you can't love and nurture every person who may need it. If you are single and hoping to find a mate yet, then take the time to ask yourself some questions as to what it is you are looking for in a guy. Do you believe this guy has all those qualities despite the fact he is recovering from drinking.
Most women want a man who can be trusted, communicates well, pays her compliments, does loving things for her, upholds and supports her in anything that is meaningful to her, enjoys being with her even if not doing anything special, can't stand being apart from her and is your sexual equal in bed and wants to please her and learn more to make sure she is always totally satisfied. Once he is done with treatment, if you really are drawn to him and find him attractive and feel there is chemistry at least on your part, then check him out if you really have no idea about him from before when you dated.
Good luck dear.

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I think my boyfriend is starting to like my best friend, but hes going to ask me to marry him. What should i do?

Two people are not supposed to marry just for the sake of being married.
Two people should marry only if they both are totally in love with each other, your day is more special just having your partner around, it makes even the mundane tasks more special, you enjoy being in each others presence, upholding and support each other in your particular goals and needs and hobbies, you have total trust in each other and great communication,
the list goes on.
You may not be feeling totally sure of where you stand in importance to him. If you are not sure and feeling he could be attracted to someone else atthe same time, either he is polyamorous in nature and if you are monogamous, then it won't work. I do not know what makes you able to state he's going to marry you. Either you are engaged to be married, or you are not. If you are not, then he has made no commitment to you and if he is feeling he wants to date someone else, he needs to make that clear to you and break up. You can not change a person or force them to like you enough to stay in a relationship or marry you. It is doomed if you did get to the part of wearing a wedding ring.
So if you have good communication which is needed for a marriage, then start talking now. Let him know what you are feeling or think you are seeing. Obviously, he is not doing his job right in upholding you and communicating how you are the only one that he will ever want to bed, that you light up his world and he cant stand to be apart from you. etc...If he's not saying things that make you feel loved and special as if he considered you his princess and puts you up on a pedastal, then something is wrong. You have every right to know where you stand with him if he is acting like he wants to be with you forever. It's not supposed to be a secret. You should not have to be asking, it should be so plain to know from both what he tells you and how he treats you.
Are you sure you're with the right guy honey?

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Does losing your virginity mean that you've had a man's penis enter you or is it only when your cherry pops? I just had sex I guess but I did not orgasm, nor did my cherry pop but he came sooo?

You didn't "Lose" anything. This should be thought of as your sexual debut with a guy. Most likely you were exploring your sexuality on your own by masturbation with hands or toys. That counts too.
The cherry or hymen stretches like a rubber band, so use of tampons and vibrators or your fingers can stretch it out so that you feel nothing, if it is really tight and stretched too quickly on some women and without lube, it can tear the skin a bit. At any point in your sex life no matter if teen or senior citizen, if not using enough lube, both he and you can feel a soreness somewhere on the penis or somewhere on the outer vaginal area or inside and if no lube is used right away, it goes from soreness to a kind of ripping of the skin.
I hope you are using birth control. If not, go to Planned parenthood asap. You want to be able to enjoy your sexuality without worry about a late period due to some other reason like a recent illness or stress.
And finally, a fun video on how you can't pop the cherry. Watch this gals other videos. She has lots to teach on sexuality and relationships.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qFojO8WkpA

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So there's this guy I like, I actually don't know if he likes me back BUT I believe that we are in the hookup zone. We've been cuddling in bed while watching movies, and later on, we start making out and hitting it up to 3rd base (cuz I dont wanna lose my vcard yet). I'm starting to really like him but I don't think I'm in the "will date" category, and more of the "hook up" category. How can I get myself out of the hookup zone and possibly escalate to the relationship zone?

Something sounds out of order. Usually when a gal and guy don't know if the other likes each other, they're at the stage of just staring at each other alot or have just talked a little but not enough to know if they want to start dating. Once they start dating, either at that stage or at the level of steady dating, is when the making out and sex occurs. You are there and don't even know if he likes you? How the heck did you end up with him on or in bed? I am sure you didn't hypnotize him or twist his arm and force him to do so. If he's at that stage with you, either he likes you as a person or he is attracted enough and hoping you turn out to be a sex partner. What you are doing, this seeing the guy and hanging out with him IS dating. You just haven't spent enough time getting to know each other enough. Unless one is in the habit of hooking up with total strangers, (there's a profession for that) I'd have to say your in a dating relationship of sorts. So start talking about anything and everything to get to know him better. Dating is for discovering what you like and don't like about the opposite sex, it's learning about relating to another human being, about all the feelings that come with it, about trust, good communication. So instead of just kissing when together, spend time talking. Tell him you want to learn how guys think. Dont ever assume anything. Ask him, to explain since he is a guy, what a guy is thinking about when he wants to hang out with a girl making out, does he do it because he truly is interested in her as a person, or is he more interested in the experience of making out. Be sure to ask how you can know the difference and what does he personnaly feel. Its that simple. WHen you approach it as asking for his help in understanding guys, you may learn a lot. Not all guys are exactly alike but there are some basics that are the same.

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OK! I am a 14 year old girl and a Freshman. There is this guy I am close friends with that I finally admitted to myself that i like him he is a 17 year old M/Junior(I have known him for a year and I like him for his personality/ he just happens tp be cute ;D) In your answers please DON'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT AGE! I am VERY mature for my age, and we both have A LOT in common. But so i ran into him at a music store we both know about and HE broke the touch barrier TWICE by hugging me for the first time. I haven't seen him since then (that was middle july) but we text everyday which is very nice. I will see him soon however (We have a Band fundraiser and Band Camp coming up. BTW both of us have never been in a relationship before) and here's the problem. I really really want him to kiss me, Or at least hug me. It's kind of freaking me out because i have never had this 'wanting' like this before. (I know it is suspected that Older guys go for younger girls for easy sex but i know he wouldn't. He is one of those shy guys that haven't dated yet) SO THE QUESTION: How can I hint for a kiss from a shy guy?? I can do hugs easily. Thank you any advice is appreciated :)

When I met my now husband 4 years ago and he was 50, he was being polite and leaving it up to me to break the barrier as to kissing and so on. So I looked for an opportunity of something nice he did for me, it was repairing a book I had that was falling apart. The moment he gave it to me I said thank you so much it means a lot to me. You're so sweet and I quickly gave him a kiss. Once he knew it was okay with me, he found opportunities to kiss me later. Thats a good way to have a reason to kiss someone. Normally a person would just give a hug, but you both have already done that, and it's a nice way to say thank you and I like you very much, enough to kiss you, at the same time. I am sure he'll get the message. I have said so before...there's nothing wrong with your age difference.
I know your guy is interested in you from what you've written before. Just enjoy being around him and invite him to hang out with you at your house for a movie and popcorn...something the parents wouldn't have a problem with. Because he is shy too, band is a great thing in common but you will need to find other things you both like to do and spend time together. Don't know where your parents are on dating and such so take things slow and let the parents know its a friend, not a boyfriend...that term freaks out parents if they think you;re too young. Let them know yu or the stories people say as to why not are in high school and want to practice feeling comfortable talking to guys. Whatever sounds like something that would win the parents over to allowing your friend to hang out at your place where they can get to know his personality and see how he treats you and gain some confidence with him. Trust me, in the long run, thats the way to go. Blessings to you. If we don't talk before school starts, then have a great start to your high school experience!

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18/f

I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 years. I've been working on myself to not be controlling because I've been seeing myself become more and more of that. I check his phone, facebook, ect. Well, I used to do that. And obviously that is a sign of not trusting him. I've stopped that because it's ridiculous and it didn't make me a very good girlfriend.

But now my problem is who he hangs out with. We came from the same group of friends. We had this one friend in common who..wasn't a very good friend. About 6 months ago, it was that friends birthday. I got him a gift and we said we'd go to his house to party. But it was also my last day home before going to college and that night I found my little brother who ran away, passed out in a car. Our "friend" cussed us out because my boyfriend wouldn't bring a mario game over.
In the beginning of our relationship, that friend started spreading rumors about us because he didn't want us to get together.
He also did drugs with my brother, bought them from him as well.
He also picked up my brother from my house and helped him run away once.
He apologized for everything, but I decided he wasn't ever a good friend. I'm not on bad terms with him or anything but I feel extremely uncomfortable with my boyfriend hanging out with him. They've been friends since they were kids.

My values have changed over the past year. I don't feel the same about drugs and alcohol. My brother was stealing jewelry, money and even cars while he was on drugs. He ended up in juvi for a couple of years. My mom became an alcoholic during this time and went to a man who'd always give it to her because my dad wouldn't. She's now in rehab, but my dad was stabbed a few times last month by that man she went to, so he ended up in the hospital. He lived though.
My boyfriend was always there for me and he knows why I feel the way I do about everything. I don't hate people who do them or anything, I just don't like being around it. So my boyfriend will go hang out with his friend and I just hate the idea of it. He doesn't smoke anymore, but I hate thinking about him around it and thinking about him with his friend.
I brought it up with him, which was probably a mistake, and he said that I'm starting to control who he hangs out with. So I just shut up. He's a good boyfriend, I just need to work on this issue.
How do I stop beating myself up over him hanging with his friend? How do I let go of my big issue with drugs and alcohol?

Thank you so much for reading this.

Wow, rough home life and neighborhood. I think your habit of not trusting is more of a type of survival skill considering the life you've had so far. Just because you forced yourself to stop snooping and checking, doesnt mean the lack of trust is gone. Theres a reason for that, why your subconscious mind isn't comsfortable with the situation. Sometimes it is very important to listen to our inner voice, go by our gut feeling which you have kindof tried but then you're put down for it. Well, there's better ways maybe to go about it.
If you continue to live around these types of humans, whether family or friends, you will be limited in your personal growth and the possible opportunities by the ones you hang with.

Logically, one can have an aquaintance with, meaning having met and know a person who might be dealing drugs or been to juvi hall. But it's an entirely different situation to have someone like that as a friend. ONe's circle of friends are a good indicator of where an individual is at in life.
So I am saying since you seem to want to put your past behind and live a better life, it's not going to happen with the people currently in your life.
Find people who are living the kind of life you want to live, and hang out with them, copy what it is that they do, use em for role models.
It might be hard to break the cycle.
I just watched an episode of Worlds toughest parents. The teens were sent to live with a black family where the husband was a Pastor of a church. He grew up in a poor neighborhood, all his friends came from homes like yours, he had to leave the neighborhood and those people behind and work extra hard to find the success he had, owning a beautiful house in a good neighborhood, a very respected man who has a heart for helping teens in trouble. He took them to show his old neighbor hood and ran into users on the street who were old friends he used to hangs with. A while later, he broke down and cried as he explained to the teens that it hurts to see their wasted lives, how their life never improved and he wished that it had. But it wasn't going to happen if they continued to live the life they had so far.
I don't know where you are going to find the support system but a church might be a good place to start. The religion isn't going to kill you and it later in life your spiritual values change and you explore other things, thats fine...but a church is the best safety net i can think of right now. There may be programs to help teens and college age people get ahead in life and make something of themselves, but again, it will take a change of surroundings both where you live and the people in it. Sorry hon...but it's going to be a rough road ahead to make these kinds of changes. Not saying to turn backs of family...but just being near by so they know you are there witnessing what is happening to them isn't going to help you. Take a period of your life to focus just on you...what you want out of life and do whatever you can to get yourself ahead in life. Once you have been able to do that, then you can go spend time visiting family, and though their lives may not have changed, and their still in the same hole they've dug for themselves, you can be a beacon to them for the moment if it ever comes that they want a way out too. Good luck!

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http://i39.tinypic.com/2eokun6.jpg

Yes, she's very pretty. But it depends on who is asking and why, also whether you or anyone one else in particular has the same taste in what they find attractive to them.
I am a female, straight, not les or bi and white. Oh and grandmother age. I have a niece who is mixed race, half white/half black and at 13 she is very beautiful too.
When it comes to self image, if thats a pic of you or best friend, keep in mind that saying,"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" which means basically that everyone has different things that they are attracted to. Like me for example, I like brunette guys instead of blond or redheads. I find that more often my attention is caught by, and i find brunettes sexier than the others. Doesn't mean the others are not handsome, just not my personal preference.
A girl needs to keep that in mind.
If a guy sent the pic and thats one of a girl he's interested in, keep in mind that what a girl looks like on the outside isn't an indicator of what you'll find on the inside if you care about getting to know the whole girl. A girl can look beautiful to your taste and have an awful personality, and yet others who may look a little more plain to your taste may be a princess on the inside, very sweet and loving.

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I'm on my period and i was able to get the applicator in but i'm scared to push the tampon out and i'm scared of how bad it'll feel taking it out. what should I do? I have a party tomorrow and I need a tampon so that I could wear my leggings.

Um, you don't push a tampon out, you pull it out by a string. If the tampon is really wet from absorbing blood, then it should come out easily. When its closer to the end of a period and it may be more dry but must be removed, then it may drag a little on the skin but thats only a little uncomfortable but shouldn't cause any great pain.

One thing that I might add that is important as a female is that you become more comfortable and knowledge about your vagina, hymen, labia, g-spot, pee spot, etc...it is very important not only for your health but also for when you are ready, for the best sexual pleasure whether masturbating or with a guy.
So I suggest you take the time to do some self educating on the subjects. To start you off I would recommend someone who is a peer (age 23) but well informed. A gal on you tube. Laci Green

https://www.youtube.com/user/lacigreen/videos

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I'm 13 female, a virgin, haven't had my period like ever. I don't know if its a yeast infection or anything. My vajayjay smells VERY VEEEERY strongly of pee. When I take a shower like 5 minutes after I'm done the smell comes back a bit, then it rapidly gets stronger. I can smell it when I move a lot or in a certain position. It smells really bad and anything I sit on smells of pee after. It's really embarrassing. My underwear is wet at the middle of the day and its uncomfortable. Any remedies? Do you have any remedies that'll work on a ODOURFUL vajayjay WITHOUT yeast infection. It DOESN'T smell like fish AT ALL. Just pee. I wipe thouroughly from front to back twice after I pee. It still doesn't do anything. I also SWEAT ALOT down there an there is never any discharge or anything but its really sweaty and wet and smells like pee! I drink roughly 4 cups of water a day and I know I more. Help!

I am wondering how long you've had this problem. If it doesn't smell fishy then it's likely not vaginitis. And you didn't say you are itching.

If it smells like urine, then likely it's urine, which means that possibly you are leaking a drop of two of urine at a time.
While you usually see incontinence problems more often in the elderly, if a young person has it, there is most likely a medical reason why its happening.
So end point being, time to see a doctor and find out what is causing it. What if you've had a bladder infection for a month now and due to have high pain tolerance and genetically you don't hardly ever get fevers with infections, it would be hard to know that there is an infection.
My dad was like that. The nurses didn't believe he had a bladder infection until my sister insisted that they don't go by a fever being present as the proof he had one cus he didnt get fevers.
Hopefully its just that and will go away for you once you've gotten meds for it. Or for whatever other condition you may have.
They most likey will also recommend kegel exercises, any exercise that strengthens the muscles down there. Good luck dear. I know its embarassing but has to be done.

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Hey, um I'm a girl obviously, but I have been thinking lately. Why am I still single? I mingle and everything but is there something wrong with me?
Short description of me:
I have realist standards for guys, not expecting some 10 or perfect romeo or even a 8inch. I'm looking for someone who I am reasonably compatible with, and has the same morals. Is decent, clean and is just into me. I am decent looking, though many of my friends (including strangers and men) have said I am beautiful, though I really am just decent and normal. I'm not uptight and sometimes my beer does get the best of me, but I don't smoke nor am I a heavy drinker unless I am at a rave. I'm 25 fresh out of college, but put together and I am in med school. I want to finish school before I am marry and I do want to have kids, but then again I'm not sure.

Is there something wrong with me? Am I actually too uptight or too, I don't know, do I have high standards? I'd just like a man who has his assets together and can provide. I am just lost by society and it's love honestly.

Don't settle for less. The decent guys are out there. They're just harder to find, like looking for a needle in a haystack. So maybe start by looking in places where you might have something in common.
Have you dated much at all? Do you have any ideas of what you are looking for in a guy and what you want to avoid? You can't overthink this...its an important part of dating and finding a relationship, being able to recognize qualities you are looking for in a guy you haven't met or been introduced to. So become a very observant people watcher. Once you think you have a prospect, start talking to the guy. You're gonna have to make the first move because most the decent guys are going to think they are out of their league. My 2nd husband of 4 years still shakes his head and can't believe that he out of all the men out there, got me!
When you have the kind of looks that dont just turn the eyes of the percent who like a particular look, but the kind of looks that catch the eye of closer to 100% of the guys, they will feel that you're reaction will be that they are beneath you. Guys worry about their looks, and personality and what they have and own and such and feel that most women won't even look at them twice. And yet there;s a great chance that there many prince charmings in this group and they just don't realize it. So make the first move girl, and good luck!

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If i touch my dick to my gf frnt hole vthout using anythng... is she 'll b pregnant........ if yes thn how we can solve the prblm

If you weren't wearing a condom when touching her, you know to know there is sperm in the precum that beads up on the tip of your penis. That alone is enough to get a girl pregnant, you don't have to be fully inside and having intercourse for that to happen. She can always take a pregnancy test.
If the two of you are going to be steady sex partners, then its time for her to see her doctor or go to Planned Parenthood and get on some birth control.

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Why i do i smell this way and what can i do to help it .

Is this a condition that has slowly been getting worse or did it just come about suddenly?
Think of what changes in diet that might contribute or something like that.
Showering alone isn't good enough to help get rid of the layer of dead skin on your body that can hold odor because of course it is decaying. Most often, we don't smell ourselves but a few others with sensitive noses can. If you can smell yourself, its either pretty strong or you have a sensitive nose.
Do you ever find when drying off after a shower that there is dead skin rubbing off when you are toweling dry? It might just be a need to scrub harder in the shower. A bar of soap with scrubby particles like ground apricot pits, is not enough. I am talking about a scratchy type of washcloth. Even better is giving your body a good dry brush scrub down with a boars hair brush made just for that reason. I got mine at a natural foods shop but I am sure you can ask around at department stores.
Once you have done this and can feel sure the odor is not due to layers of dead skin on your body, if the odor remains, it's time to go see a doctor.
I went to school with a kid who had a physical condition that didn't allow his pores of his skin to breathe and allow sweat to come out as it naturally should. As a result he reeked pretty strongly and as far as I know from what teacher said to not tease him, there wasn;t anything they could do about it then.
Perhaps the medical field has come up with ways to fix that by now if that is your case. Good luck

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I'm a girl who is thirteen years old. I have always been somewhat annoying, but the most annoying thing I do is talk about my crushes nonstop. Everyone really hates it, especially my sister and my dad. I try to stop, but I just can't!

Right now, I have a crush on a girl I met at camp and a teacher. (I don't care that they are girls . . . I'm not the type of person who cares about gender.) The thing they have in common is that I might not see them again -- at least I won't see them any time soon. I'm going to a new school next year, so I won't be at the same school as my teacher. The girl I met at camp said she'll be there next year, but that is a long time away. I think the main reason why I talk about them is because I miss them so much, but nobody seems to understand that.

I don't want everyone to think I'm an annoying weirdo because of the fact that I talk about my crushes so much. Any advice on how to stop would be appreciated. Thank you.

No one wants all the details about crushes or even the solid relationships. As long as its a healthy relationship, no one is going to care enough to want to hear all your thoughts and feelings.

Does it mean all your thoughts and feelings are not normal and shouldei stop? Not really. Why? Because it's all part of the experience through your teen and college age years, of dating and relationships.
We all have to start somewhere. And the first time we "feel" something for another person because our bodies are going through puberty and have the hormonal changes, it's wonderful...but keep in mind "It's Your Experience" not everyone elses.
So what do you do instead of telling everyone else about it?
Try what I did at your age, keep a diary. I had a diary, one for every year starting at age 13 and the last year was when I was 20 and got married. Actually that was a mistake, too soon and not enough experience to know better.
But the fact is, whether writing in a book with pages diary, or whether keeping one on line on your pc., it is a wonderful memory you can go back to and no one has to listen to you talk about your crushes again. And it actually works to help your need to tell someone and express what you are feeling, even if its only a diary.

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Hey everyone! So im a girl and i really really like this guy named jacob who is my age but he lives about 30 min away and we go to different schools and wouldnt be able to hangout alot.. weve hungout all weekend and we have had such a good time together! Hes such a gentleman, old fashioned, so sweet, kind, nice, cute, and funny!:) he makes me laugh and smile all the time.. he likes me too but then theres the distance to think about.. i think it could work but im not sure! should i go for it? Or just stay friends?

If you put things in perspective, you'll see why there's no reason not to go for the experience as I will explain next.
I dont know why most young people think of dating and relationships at their age as finding the one person at their age whom they will end up with in a "Life Time" committed relationship whether married or not.
Dating really is about the experiences...plural..so more than one relationship experience. While in one, it's hard to imagine it ever ending and moving on but the objective is to experience the good and not so good to better know who the perfect person for you is. Two wonderfully sweet people can be together but if that romantic spark or chemistry is missing, it won't last forever. Then again, a small percent of people meet their lifetime mate in their teens so I know it's possible.

So given that fact that it is important to experience relationships, there's no reason not to, not even the distance, especially since you feel attraction and get along well together.
At some point, you will be driving or if you have
your license, have access to a car or have a car
of your own so that you can much easier visit each other. A half hour away when you have a car and can drive is no deterent at all for a possible relationship. When I met my second husband, he lived 40 mins away from me. I didn't mind the drive to see him because the relationship was worth it. Enjoy your guy. He sounds wonderful.

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I'm a thirteen-year-old girl, and I have a major crush on a guy who I met at a place called Camp Stevens over a year ago. I really need to get over him, but I can't.

Here's what happened: Last year at camp, we were good friends, but I started having feelings for him. I was embarrassed and didn't want him to find out. But right before we left, he told me that he liked me. I hugged him and said I liked him back. But I wasn't able to get any of his contact information.

Even after that week at camp was over, I still liked him. I wanted to have a way to remember him, so I wrote a novel about our week together at Camp Stevens.

I just went back to Camp Stevens a few weeks ago, and he wasn't there. I cried for a while, and my experience at camp this year wasn't as fun because I was thinking of him the whole time.

I miss him so much, and I would give anything to see him again. It seemed like we were perfect for each other -- we have lots in common, and he is so sweet and thoughtful. But there is no way I can see him again, and I have to get over him. Sometimes, it is very hard to stop liking someone who you wrote a 140-page book about and think of every day.

If you have any advice on how to get over him, I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you!

I want to give you a heads up that what you are going through will happen over and over and over in the years ahead even through college age. It's all part of a learning period in our life, the experiences, of what crushing feels like, what a healthy relationship with the opposite sex is like, and of course, what a bad unhealthy relationship is like too, or where its a good person, the perfect guy but what it feels like when that spark or chemistry is missing, it's important to have someone not just to have sex with to take care of urges but where you both have deeper feelings for each other and sexually the excitement level is still there once the excitement of a new relationship wears off. Thats called New relationship energy NRE and we all experience it.
End result is that you will go through several relationships over this period of time before you find someone who is perfect for you and you for him and you end up having a life time committed relationship together, whether married or not.
I still remember a family vacation where a guy paid me attention and sought me out and flirted with me. It was my first time experiencing anything like that and it's still clear in my mind even though I'm old enough to be your grandma. Yes, eventually the pain of a possible relationship or a real one not working out, will fade and all you'll be left with is the good memories attached to it, how wonderful it felt at one point, and also the memories of what you learned. You'll learn to take in all in stride if you keep in mind, that its all part of the learning process in dating and relationships.
Good luck dear.

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Do men come back to you faster if you ignore them?

Maybe the question should be "Why did he leave in the first place?"
When you say come back to me, that would make me assume there was a solid relationship to begin with, that you were in a steady dating relationship. Anything before that, no matter what level the interest is only to discover what you may like about the other person, going beyond just the looking at each other to the talking stage to then dating to get to know a little more and then if the person is still interested, maybe then living together. I don't know at what stage he left. Think back over how things were going. Where there any signs that he was restless, or not totally happy with the relationship. How open were you both to discussing the things that needed to be worked on in the relationship? Is it really a good thing to hope he comes back, or would that be prolonging something that was never meant to be.
I know it gets hard to see clearly, cus I have been there, my heart once involved didn't want to leave a guy in even a blatantly abusive relationship, twice. But I finally figured it out. It hurts when you feel a love connected to someone who doesn't deserve it if thats the case, or even if he's a good guy. Two really great people could be together and can force the relationship to work even if that spark, or chemistry is missing or very low in sexual compatibility. Perhaps thats why why he left, he is seeking a stronger sexual chemistry. I dont know dear, you didn't say much. Until I know the reasons for him leaving, I really can't give constructive advice as to what to do to deal with the problem that led to it.
If you want, you can go to my site and write to my inbox. Just adding to your question, I can't necessarily go back in and edit and answer.

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I am sooo ugly , how do I make myself prettier ? Im a female 14

Usually when someone thinks they are not pretty enough, it is because they are comparing themselves to something else.
So my question would be, do you even know exactly what image you are trying to live up to?
Is it some girls at school? Is it what you see for actresses, models and other celebs on TV and in magazines?

ONe point I'd like to make is that you aren't even done growing yet. Your body will still continue to change some.

Also, think about think question: What is it that you believe makes a person popular?
Is it based 100% on looks?
Is it based on how rich they are/ what things they have or own?
Is it based on their confidence and self image
Is it based on their personal hobbies and likes?
Is it based on their personality?

There are things you can do to boost your confidence in how pretty you look on the outside. All girls seem to get caught up in it, hair styles, makeup, nails, clothes and their accessories are the friends that hang out by your side. Guess what? Is this is your only idea of beauty, you are going to really panic when you get older and you don't have youthful skin anymore, fine wrinkles, a different body shape from having kids, some grey hairs, etc.

The actual fact is: not all peoplefrom your age onthrough senior citizens are going to be attracted to the exact same thing. For example, some guys growing up with a mom who was a bit chubby to overweight, is either going to feel that is beautiful and what he wants in a girl, a thin girl feels too fragile to him, or he will want to look for the opposite, a thin girl to experience something different. Some guys are superficial and will never really truly love a female because all they are interested in is skin deep, the barbie girl or model look with the botox, plastic surgery, fake boobs. You don't want to attract a guy like that because they will be nothing but constant heartache. And some guys, are interested in the "real woman" the natural look. When I met my 2nd husband, he asked me if I would consider no longer coloring my hair and letting any grey hairs show. My hair is now natural and guess what? Even though I wasn't sure I was ready to sport grey hair, I am very happy because I have a man who really truly loves it, compliments me all the time and plays with my hair. I even notice men of all ages looking at me appreciatively. It feels good to know one can be themselves and there will always be people who find you attractive to them.
Thats what I want to see happen for you dear. If you would like to talk and ask more, just write to my inbox. Just accept yourself as you are. Make some good choices on clothing colors depending on your skin color and styles depending on your body type. Right now, being a happy , friendly, approachable, outgoing, self confident is going to speak more loudly to the right kind of guys. The ones who appreciate a real female, not one all made up. Good luck

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I know this is real, it is not made up in my head. I have been hearing scary voices & seeing shadow people for 10 years. No one believes me.

I know I'm not schizophrenic! People have told me I am and I'm not.

I started suffering from sleep paralysis when I was 10. I also started seeing shadow people moving around & I've heard evil voices. I can't sleep, when I close my eyes I hear them. They make loud scary noises and Im REALLY scared. Sometimes I'm in my room AWAKE and I'll freeze up & start hearing voices. I can't move or talk when this happens.

A week ago I was over my grandma's sleeping on the couch. I felt a spirit go into my body. I see them at her house too. I jumped off of the couch and heard and evil voice really loud. MY GRANDMA WAS IN THE OTHER ROOM sleep, she didn't hear it. It scared me so much that I was shaking for days & I couldn't sleep. No one hears the voices i hear & it scares me the most. I've tried praying & everything.

I BELIEVE THESE ARE EVIL SPIRITS AND IM SCARED. NO ONE BELIEVES ME.

I'm terrified & it's ruining my life. No one believes me. I'm scared. I've read stories on the internet of people going through the same thing I'm going through, about hearing voices & seeing evil spirits. If I go to a psychiatrist, they'll just call me crazy. I can't sleep by myself & I'm scared to go in my room. I hear deep evil voices ALL DAY.

How do I get these spirits & voices to go away?

You could have had some mental problems but since your sister heards and experiences the same, it's definitely a haunting of spirits that have singled you two out. WhaT I dont know is your age. If you both are still with your parents and under legal age, you may need to get them to be willing to try psychics who deal with the paranormal and hauntings., or whether they just haunt the house you live in. You mentioned the same problem at Grandma's which means souls/spirits that attachment to you personally which means if you move elsewhere, it goes with you. You will need an expert, a psychic who deals with the paranormal and can sense and see spirits and hear and talk to them too. There are groups of people who specialize in breaking the hold of any evil spirits on a person. Both you and sis need to get it taken care of together. It won't help if only one of you get free of your own spirits, only to have some of hers decide to attach to you.
Start researching for your state who deals with this kind of thing. I can't say if they charge or others do it just because it's the right thing to do to help others with this very specific problem. If the parents don't believe you, no matter your age, If I were you, I would hound and hound the paranormal experts until I got someone who agreed to help, let them know the parents aren't believing. Maybe they can talk to your parents and get their okay. Otherwise, If I were desparete enough, I would wait til parents were away at work, stay home from school while the paranormal spirit workers came over during the day to work on freeing me from the evil spirits. Something has to happen. If you can't find a group or individual easily in your search, I would try the pagan groups in your area next. Like through Meetup.com find pagan groups and ask the members if anyone knows of someone who specialize in banishing evil spirits. While some who consider themselves wiccan or witches have good intentions, not all have the real giftings but they should know of someone who does do this for real and with good results all the time. I have a friend who lives in Seattle who in recent years decided to start up a company called Haunted Healings. I know she's always been able to see angels, and spirits ever since she was a child. She herself wasn't haunted but had the ability to see and talk to them and so there must be others like her in other cities. And she is strongly active in the pagan community and considers herself a wiccan witch. These witches I talk about are not Satanists. Those are two very different things. THey walk in the light and attempt to do only good and help heal, pray...
I hope you can find some people who'd be willing to help you and sis. Good luck dear

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