about

My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.

The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.

advice

my name is Rachel and i am a 22 year old woman and i just started taking a new medicine that's suppose to help me with my depression and to quit smoking and I just started taking it about a week ago and i have been having some weird symptoms and I don't know if it is from the medicine or i am just going crazy because how i have been acting is very unusual for me. I don't normally sleep walk and i spent the night at my best friends house the other night and she told me that I was sleep walking and spinning around in circles and pulling my hair saying my hair is short over and over again. I have also been seeing and hearing stuff and i don't normally see stuff are the side affects from wellbutrin? Do i need to talk to my doctor to see if it is okay for me to take the medicine or if i am starting to have severe mental problems other than my depression and mental retardation.

Since these problems are new one would have to believe they are related to the Wellbutrin. YOU NEED TO CALL YOUR DOCTOR IMMEDIATLEY AND NOT TAKE ANY MORE OF THIS MEDICATION UNTIL YOU SPEAK WITH YOUR DOCTOR.

You could also talk with your pharmacist to see what he or she thinks. Not all the side effects that may be seen during the drugs trials are always listed. The pharmacist has access to more information on drugs than you or I do and can better advise you if you have trouble reaching your doctor.


If the pharmacist is unable to help you and you cannot reach you doctor these side affects are serious enough that I would advise going to a hospital emergency room or walk-in clinic.


Sleep walking is very disturbing as you are not aware of what you are doing. You could, and the worst thing we would want to have you do; is get in your car and drive around when you are sleep walking. Which has been done. So don't delay. CALL YOUR DOCTOR OR GO TO THE ER.

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I'm a 27 yr old attractive female. I'm smart and I have a loving family. I have thought about killing myself since I was 13. I now live in a new city with my fiance, but I know no one here, I'm so lonely and becoming so needy and therefore unhappy. It's not that I was to die so much as I cant go on this way. I don't know if I'm strong enough to pick up the pieces on my own. My fiance says he loves me (he really is the love of my life) but where is he? I don't know, out drunk with his friends somewhere. So, I know it seems ridiculous but remember, I have been thinking this way for 14 yrs, I've thought a lot about it. Any way I can do this somewhat painlessly and not end up in a hospital with brain or organ damage? Please help me

We are asked this question a lot. why I don't know. If there was a painless way to die we would not tell you as that is not what we do here.

Are purpose her is to help people. You have been thinking about this for 14 years. My thoughts are if you have not made one attempt in 14 years you really want to live not die and we can help you live if I am correct i my thinking.


People who contemplate suicide are generally depressed over something. I can offer you the following hotline to call.

This is the : National Suicide Prevention Helpline 1-800-273-8255 (1-800-273-TALK). The people here will help you through any crisis you may be having as well as help you find people near you that can offer long term help.



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hey, i am a columnist on here and i love helping people but now i need some help back. I've been involved with this guy over a year now, we happen to love each other. He redefined my perspective on love, on life, on MYSELF. He is... amazing.

But i live in a very strict old fashion christian family and i'm literally the only girl in my generation. My family doesn't even allow me to date and i'm EIGHTEEN!!!! Yeah... it's that bad.

But anyway... me and the guy were having sex... and he came in... not just a little bit. the full on throttle shot DEEP in there. i tried to wipe it out but idk if it did anything.

Now before you say where is the protection... talk to trojan. there condemn ripped... beautiful right?

But anyway whats my next move... i can't swallow pills (the morning after thing) and i could wait to c if i get my period but my body is wierd and i only get my period once every three-four months...

So what's my next move?

Two things first. Having your period once every three or four months makes it hard to know when in your cycle you are fertile. A women is usually fertile in mid cycle or 14 days past the end of her last period. This being a normal 28 day period. With your cycle it could be way different.


Two: Learn to swallow pills. At 18 you should be able to swallow pills. You can practice on M&Ms, I believe that is how most of us learned. Just put the candy on your tongue and drink a glass of water. Don't think about it, ext thing you know the candy goes down just as a pill will. Practice today and if you get it right and it has not been 7 days you can still take the plan B pill. Its not as effective as if it is taken with in 48 hours but it is known to still work.

Next if you and this boy are going to continue to have sex? You need to talk to your doctor about birth control. Your 18 an adult you do not need parental permission. There are methods of birth control, for you, that do not require taking pills. The pill is the most effective. They are small and you can put them in apple sauce or pudding if you need to.

Next even if you are on the pill, you know your boyfriend still needs to wear a condom. Make sure he knows what size to buy and how to put one on so they do not break.

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hii
myself is a student.i am 26 years old. from last few years i had suffer from stomach problems. i just feel like a heartbeat in my stomach and the stomach also takes the shape of stomach like a pregnant women.from last year there is soft skin came from my but i can touch it .i dont know what is it.and max. time white coloured substance came from my vagina but now a brown coloured substance came from my vagina whenever my periods starts and comes to end.but this time my periods start from 12th of march and closed on 18th of march but at 23 of march brown colouredxd substance again withdraw from my vagina, i also feel cramps in my but and legs and give me feeling as there is hard substace in my but and once it came out then may be i could be ok. please tell me what is these symptoms am i pregnat or not.plz plz help me i really thankful to u.

If you are getting your periods I don't think you are pregnant. I do think you need to see a doctor as the things you write about do not sound normal and should be checked by a Gynecologist.

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I am 17 and she is 16.i had masteurbathed one night and the next day i fingered my girlfriend.its 20 days since this .she got her period today but it was followed by vomiting twice.what is it actually is she pregnant or are the bile juices coming out through vomiting.is there any chance of sperms being in my nail while fingering her on that day?what is it actually?

If your girlfriend got her period she should not be pregnant. Her period is the cleansing of the womb; cleaning it out to prepare it for the implantation of a fertilized egg during her next fertile cycle. This would be in about 14 days form the end of her period.

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I just wanna know why one of my boobs is bigger than the other. Also, how can I change that? It's been bothering me. Thank you.

It is normal for one breast to be slightly different is size and shape even than the other. Now the difference in size may be more distinct while your breast are still growing.


If there is a large difference in size then this is not normal and you need to see a doctor. The problem is treatable; usually with plastic surgery once you have fully matured.


The first thing you need to do is talk with your mom. This is not a sex issue so their should be nothing to be embarrassed about. Should she want to look at your breast, to see the size difference herself, there is still no reason to be embarrassed. You are both women and she too has breasts. That and the fact she is your mother and as she will probably tell you she did change your diapers.


The problem itself, if minimal is very normal. No two of anything is exactly alike. Which is why breast enhancement surgery is so popular. No matter how good the surgeon may be they will not get both breast to be exactly the same. This being so they will look normal to anyone fortunate enough to see them up close and personal.

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*Sorry if this is long, but please read. I need help as soon as I can get it.*
I'm a female. My age is between 11-16.
I hate my body. I think i'm so fat and I wish I can look like my role model, Bella Thorne.
I hate my weight. I really wish I was skinny, but I honestly think i'm like an elephant. I don't really have a double chin, but if I lean my head back then you can see it.I'm around 90 pounds.
I hate myself. I was really skinny and picky when I was younger, but I ended up going overweight one summer. Then I was overweight that whole school year. The next summer(last summer), I started to get concerned about my weight and stopped eating.
Ok, so here's the deal: I WANT TO STARVE MYSELF. I feel guilty when I eat. How do I starve myself? I don't eat at school, so I guess that's a start.
Please don't tell me all this stuff saying "Eat" and you know. Thanks!

Be you 11 or 16 or anywhere in between at 90 pounds you are underweight. Being underweight is more dangerous than being overweight. More on this in a moment.


No one on this website is going to tell you how to do something that is harmful to you or anyone else. We will tell you or attempt to tell you how to help yourself and make things better for yourself.


As for looking like Bella Thorne I would not recommend it. I looked at some pictures of her and frankly she looks a bit anorexic. Being underweight to the point of looking anorexic is dangerous.

Anorexia is an eating disorder that people develop when the stop eating. Their desire to look like runway models and movie stars is so all consuming they cannot will themselves to eat. What happens when you do not eat is the body's self-preservation system kicks in. It starts feeding on itself. The by doing so the electrolytes that keep all of are vital systems functioning get destroyed or out of balance. Different systems start to shut down. First the kidneys shut down, then the Live, the lungs and finally the Brain. The last to shut down is the heart.

Long before some of this happens you will be in the hospital on life's support. Most likely in a comma with family and friends at your bedside trying to will you to live. By this time it will be to late.


If you think I am trying to scare you I am. Several years ago a friend of mine buried his daughter, who was less than 10 years older than you purport to be. She died of complications from anorexia. She was a Porrima Ballerina for a not to well know Ballet Company. It is unfortunate that most anorexics do not survive the illness.


You are underweight. You need to see a doctor and find out what your proper weight should be and be paced on a proper diet to include a daily calorie count to safely get you to that weight.


You start by telling your parents you are skipping meals to loose weight and are trying to starve yourself. You tell them you are in trouble and need to see the proper doctors to help you. You may or may not have doe irreparable harm to yourself. The only way to find out is to see a doctor ASAP.


For additional help and information. You can call. The National Association of Anorexia and Associated Disorders(ANAD). The ANAD Helpline 630-577-1330 is open Monday through Friday 9 AM Through 5 PM Central Time.

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i see horney videoes everytime and masterbuting please give me an idea to leave it

Masturbation is a natural form of release for sexual tension. Unless your masturbating to the exclusion of all other activities; I see no reason to stop. Just do so where no one will see you or where you will not be disturbed while doing so.


Masturbation is best done in private, with the possible exception of sex play with your significant other. Doing so allows you to complete the act without disturbing anyone or being interrupted.

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ok so everytime a guy i like asks me out out of nowhere, i feel like its a dare or something. So a guy i like asked me out today but i was not expexting it at all he was just like "will you go out with me" on facebook and i do but i would be sooo embarrassed if it was a dare and that way if it was i could say i was kidding. u know what i mean??? WHAT DO I SAYYYY??? Im 13 btw /=

As someone old enough to be your grandparent I would think 13 is far to young to be dating. When my son was 13 I would not allow him to date. He was allowed to meet friends at the Mall, movies or other places for group activities. If this is what you mean by dating then accept his request.


Otherwise you can always fall back on the old standard answer. "My parents do not allow me to date." That worked fine when I was your age. It worked well when my nieces were your age. I believe it will always work well as it pus the reason for saying no on your parents and not you.

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I am 16 and I just had unprotected sex with my boyfriend, I was previously a virgin, he did not cum in me he has alot of self control, trust me I would know and we didn't do it for very long before he popped my cherry and I told him to stop because it hurt. But he DID precum inside me and I would like to know of those risks I know it's possible but unlikely to get pregnant from precum but the bigger picture is what are the risks such as sexually transmitted diseases. I've read online that it's possible to contract chlamydia and ghonneria easier through precum but sometimes the internet doesn't give very valid info like (you have to be ovulating to get pregnant and my friend says that's the stupidest thing she's ever heard and her teacher says it's rediculously easy) but anyone who knows for sure, for a fact, perhaps an educated professional on these things. I just don't want more false information. Please and thank you for your help!

Your friend is wrong. You have to be ovulating to get pregnant. When you ovulate is when your ovaries release the egg that if fertilized becomes a fetus which when born is a child. At the end is a URL to a Website that explains this in much better detail than I can.


Anytime you have unprotected sex you leave yourself open to contracting an STD. That being said condoms do not protect against all STDs. You should learn more about condoms, birth control and protecting yourself from STDs before engaging in sexual activities. Not all STDs are contractible through fluid transfer. Some can be gotten through contact as they are lesions open on the skin. Cold sores are a form of the Herpes virus and transferable through kissing or oral sex.


A good deal of this information should have come from your mother when she told you about life. More information is available on the Web. You can gain more information by visiting a planned parenthood center. While there you can ask about and receive birth control information and prescriptions should you want them.


By Federal Law, now that you are over 14, you can see any doctor without parental permission. This law, called HIPPA, was passed specifically to allow young people to seek medical attention for their reproductive health, without seeking parental permission.


This law allows for you to meet privately with the doctor and be totally open and honest with the doctor about whatever is bothering you or your concerns. This way the doctor can effectively treat you. Mom cannot be in the exam room with you and the doctor cannot release any information to her or anyone else without your written permission.


By the way you can get pregnant from precum. There is more than enough sperm in precum to get the job done. Precum is emitted by the male without sensation to him. That is why the pullout method of birth control has the highest rate of pregnancies. If you had sex after the 14th day of your period and 5 days there after; and it has been within 7 days you may want to consider the Plan B pill.



http://www.ehow.com/how_2050654_determine-woman-fertile.html

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Hi, im 16 and just got home from school, i went on our home computer and found my dads yahoo messenger up, i became looking through them and discovered that my dad was flirting with women and asking to meet up with them; he even was alright with having sex with them , i am so scared...i cant imagine my parents getting divorced and i dont think i can bring it upon myself to tell my mom, what should i do?

Have you ever heard the expression of being between a rock and a hard place or damned if you do damned if you don't. This is exactly where your at right now.


Your snooping put you in touch with information you should not have seen. Part of this is your dads fault for leaving his messaging open to be seen.


My question to you is; had you not found this information is there any indication or rather was there any indication that things were not good between your parents. Meaning; do they argue or fight more than you remember them doing in the past? Have they been less affectionate around you and any siblings you have? Does your dad show you less affection or spend less time with you and the family?


As long as dad is not harming your mother physically as in hitting or beating her. There is no reason for you to intercede in their marriage. As long as your dad continues to show you love and affection you should not change your feelings for him either. What you think is happening may or may not be happening. This may be something your mother is aware of and chosen to live with.


If you were to say something to your mom or your dad it could force the issue into the open where she or dad would be forced to deal with it. My thoughts are that unless or until your home life changes you do not know for sure what you read.


My advice is not to say anything to anyone about what you read.

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Do Women Enjoy Anal Sex ?

When it comes to Anal sex the answer is. Some do and some don't. Be you man or women to know if you will enjoy Anal sex you have to try it once or twice to know. Anal sex is something you will either love or hate. There is no in between.

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So i'm a female of course, 16 years old, and my boyfriend is 17 years old, and i want to loose my virginity to him, but i'm scared. We've almost done it several times. The first time we almost did it he removed half my clothing, and we stopped since i was scared. I'm sort of insecure with my body, but he said he loves me with sex or without it. We've talked several times about doing it, but i'm not sure what to do or if i'll do something totally wrong. I got my promise ring, but i want to try at least once, we know how to turn eachother on but i'm still a little scared. He's only done it one other time his whole life, so i'm not worried about that, but should I do it, or not.? Help please, any advice welcome.

The best answers to your question will be found on the website I have attached the URL for. I found this site while answering similar questions for other young lady's. Many have written to say they found it most helpful.


At 16 I think you are still to young to be having sex. The chances of the boy you want to give your virginity two of being the man you marry is about 90% against. You will probably not even have any type of long term relations ship.

If he is a senior in high school he will leave for college in a few short months and you will both find new people to be with. Then you will go off to college, probably a different one then him. You will then find new friends too.


I would suggest you wait until your in college where your life goals take shape and you have a better chance of a long term relationship possibly even meeting and marrying the man you will spend the rest of your life.



http://www.pamf.org/teen/sex/virginity/readyornot.html.

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21 - female

I cannot finish no matter what my boyfriend and I do!!! A couple nights, he ate me out/fingered me for at least an hour and still didn't finish. We've tried 69, everything...

He tries so hard to please me and give me what I want but I feel terrible that I can't! I have never finished before (I don't think so at least)

I don't know what to do anymore!!!

There are a number of reasons why you are having a problem. First understand if a boy gets an erection the chance of him not cumming is about 1% at your ages. Basically a boy gets hard he can cum through oral, hand or intercourse at almost anytime or any place.


For a girl it is a little more complicated. Unlike a boy a girl cannot just drop her pants and have intercourse. She needs foreplay. She needs to be comfortable and she needs to feel safe in her surroundings. Remove any of these three things and the boy will get off and she probably will not.


What I suggest is that you first find out if you can orgasm. To do so I suggest you go in your bedroom, lock the door, undress and make love to yourself. Call it self-foreplay or masturbation if you want. There is no sin in masturbation it is after all nothing more than foreplay and according to a recent survey 85 percent of us do it. Most religions condone masturbation including the Catholic church.


If you can relax in your own room and bring yourself to orgasm then there's nothing wrong with you. What you will find out is if you are clitoral or vaginal in nature. If you can orgasm by stimulating your clitoris then what you need to do is get your boy friend to stimulate your clitoris during foreplay and to find positions that allow for greater stimulation of your clitoris during intercourse.


You may also find that you need to spend more time on foreplay before actually having intercourse. Teenage boys are always in a rush to get to the act, so you may have to slow him down both before, during foreplay and while having intercourse to allow you to catch up to him.

Most important for a female to reach orgasm is comfort and security. Meaning having sex in a bed someplace where you will not be disturbed or overheated or intruded upon.

By the way this is fairly normal for people your age. Boys are quick on the trigger so research the web to find ways to slow him down and I think you will find what you are missing as well.

I hope I have helped.

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I caught my daughter giving my best friends son a blowjob. How do I confront her and my friend?

It is a parents worse nightmare to catch one of their, young, children having some type of sex. How to handle this depends a little bit on the age of your daughter and her boyfriend.


Unfortunately there is a bit of a double standard when comes to parents of the boy then the parents of the girl. So if your thinking your friend will be as upset as you are that might not happen.


You did not give the ages of the your daughter or the boy which does matter. If they are in their early teens how you handle this is different than how you handle this if they are closer to the age of consent for your state or 18.


If I were to have caught my children at an early age in that act I believe what I would do is this: I would sit both of them down and explain it is not the act that I am upset about. I would not want to criminalize the act so to speak. What I would want to stress is that at their age they are far to young to understand the ramifications of the act and where this may lead to.


I might, here again knowledge of their ability to understand helps, go so far as I do in answering question here. Explain how I believe sex is a wonderful thing between two adults and why though their body's may be capable of the act; they and their body's have not matured enough to be fully aware of the consequences that come with adult sexual relations. A blowjob is part of adult sexual relations.


Yes they have hormones floating around in them that causes sexual tension in them. There are ways, if you wish to discuss this with them, to relieve those tensions without any sexual contact between them. I am of course speaking of masturbation. This is of course up to you to decide if you wish to discuss this with them.


They have hit puberty and they are feeling sexual tension. This tension is the driving force behind what you walked in on. Boys more so than girls are constantly looking for sex. Boys also confuse lust and love in there search for sex. They say whatever it takes to get relief.


As for confronting your best friend? I would not confront her. Confront means having a confrontation or argument. I don't think this is what you want. If the boy agrees to sit down and talk with you and your daughter. If you are able to reach an agreement with both of then. Having a fight with your best friend can be avoided. If you feel she should know what happened you can say something to her conversationally Like; "You'll never guess what I found our two kids doing the other day?" If he hasn't already told her you can follow by , " Ihave already had a conversation with both of them and feel the situation has been handled.


The last thing you want to do though is to bar your daughter from seeing him. Remember the old story about forbidden fruit. They will find away to be with each other if they want to be with each other. Better you know who your daughter is see then not know.


I hope my advise helps.

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what makes my bf get a boner when fingering me when most boys that finger thier girlfriends while making out don't?

There are a number of reason all of which are very normal.

First: It could be the pleasure and excitement he is receiving in fingering you.

Second: When you are being fingered if you find this sexually pleasurable your scent you emit gets stronger. Your scent you emit has pheromones or are pheromones which are emitted to arouse and attract a mate. This scent causes you BF to become erect as well.


Third s any visual stimulation he may be receiving while fingering you. For instance if you are naked, or naked from the waist down. Also if you are moaning the oratory stimulation he is receiving also causes him to be come erect.


This is all quite normal. So would your offer to give him and HJ or BJ you would find him erect and ready well before you reached for him. This would normal as his brain would be anticipating your actions. Also very normal.


Teenage boys get excited very easily. It is the new hormones floating through them. I read somewhere that boys get an erection about 4 times an hour. It is an involuntary reaction caused by his hormones hence the word horny.

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okay im 15 and i was was going to dedicate a song to my step dad showing thanking him for everything he has done for me more than my real dad.
you see my real dad has never been in my life, until now he has been trying to talk to me i dont wanna to talk to him but my mom said o should get to kno him but anyways i just wanna let my step dad he is the number one dad and he wont ever be replaced.
thx and my dad is into country :))

I think what you are thinking of doing for your step-dad is very sweet of you. He had a choice to be your step-dad and to raise you as his own. There are not to many men who would do that.


While I think what your doing is great I would like to offer another suggestion. As a dad myself I think if I was a step-dad I would really cherish is a letter from you telling me how much you appreciate me being there for you and thinking of me as your only real dad, like you said here, "He is your number one dad and no one can replace him."


The dedication of a song is nice. A letter is something he can keep and show his friends and your children later on. If it is affordable and you chose to write a letter to him I would suggest the two of you go out to dinner someplace nice just the two of you where you can dress up. Maybe a small gift of a Bracelet inscribed with a with that thought of; "You are r my number one dad and no one can replace you." Given to him with the letter.


Other than grandchildren this to me would be the greatest gift you could give me, the letter that is. The dinner and bracelet are window dressing if affordable.

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Every time talk to my boyfriend he always gets a boner even I'm not talking about sex?

This is normal for teenage boys. He is probably very embarrassed about it as it is not something he can control. It is an involuntary action that for teenage males occurs several times an hour.


Teenage boys need very little if any visual stimulation to get an erection. You don't have to be talking about sex, sitting in a provocative manner or even dressed in sexy clothing for him to become erect. It can happen just holding hands. He is having an involuntary reaction to the hormones now float around in him since he entered puberty. As he gets older and his body adjusts to these hormones he will have less involuntary erections.

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I Discharge Before Sex

I would like to no more about what you mean by discharge and if you are male or female.

If you are female and you are talking about getting wet to the point that your panties become wet or moisture may sort of run down you leg? This can be normal as you are suppose to get wet in your vagina to allow the boys penis to enter you. You are lubricating. If you are highly excited you may produce more lubrication than you need resulting in it seeping out of you.


If the discharge is not your typical scent or is not clear, then you should see a Gynecologist as something is not right.


If you are male and the discharge is a small amount you may be emitting precum. This is rare for men as it normally requires some stimulation of your penis, either with sexual contact with a vagina or with some type of foreplay.


If it is a full discharge as in an ejaculation that is not normal and you should consult a Urologist.

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Lately I'm really into my male coworker. We talk at work alot and I know the usual signs for when a guy is into you but it makes me feel neurotic thinking about it haha. But, in general hell start conversations with me and kinda always be next to me throughout our shift. We have slightly proactive conversations but they aren't ever truly serious and always in good fun. I.e. we were chatting about how he usually doesn't talk to girls like that and I said it's cause I'm like a bro (guys girl) and he said "aww no don't say that. I'd hit it haha" And he also tells me that he likes talking/working with me and that I'm easy to talk to. He also remembers things about me that I've forgotten that I've told him. Overall I get the feeling he's into me, but I don't want to assume he does, when he only wants to have sex or just be friends. Any input/feedback?

Workplace romances are never a good idea. If they fail you still have to see each other at work which can cause conflicts for both of you.


The office problems aside; if all he is looking for is a friend with benefits relationship. Is this something you would be comfortable with? This type of relationship plus the difference in your ages tells me he may have another interest outside of work that might not be providing benefits until she gets a wedding ring.


These are just a few things you should consider before moving forward with any relationship with him, especially one that ends in the bedroom.

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