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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
Is it possible for me to pop my cherry while i was riding a horse? i mean my pussy bled and stuff but could this have popped my cherry? My boyfriend will rape me if he finds out that my cherry is popped so i really need to know! i might just kill myself.
First popping your cherry as you call it; or losing your virginity are two different things. Popping your Cherry is generally considered to be losing your virginity which for most girls also means they breaking their Hymen.
The operative word here is MOST. Girls like you who are athletic or go horseback riding or are avid cyclist will most likely break their Hyman while participating in these types of activities. they and you are still virgins.
It matters not weather your Hyman is intact or not as to the status of your virginity. By today's definition if you have not had vaginal intercourse you are a virgin. Your boyfriends threats to rape you is a crime, in some cases that crime may raise to the level of a felony. Depending on his age he could be charged as an adult and do adult jail time for this crime should you or your parents report him.
If your boyfriend is threatening to rape you what type of person is he really. I don't think he truly loves you for if he did he would not be threatening to hurt you in such a hateful and demeaning manner. In fact I think your boyfriend is typical of most teenage boys in that he has confused lust with love and wants sex anyway he can get it. If it takes raping some girl to get it. He may be capable of doing so.
My advice is to stop seeing him. He does not love you in the manner you love him. Tell your parents he has threatened to rape you. Let them decide if this should be a Police matter. Since I am old enough to be your grandfather I would advise that it be made a police matter. If for no other reason that he learns he can't go around making those types of threats.
The police may or may not charge him with a crime. That will be a decision they will have to make. At the very least their investigation should scare him into understanding that he cannot use bravado, be it false or otherwise, to get a what he wants from someone. That is coercion also a crime.
So please stop seeing him now, and please, please tell your parents. It is for your own good as well as his.
Hi guys, I'm 16 years old and I am female. I have been dating this guy for a little over 2 months and I am always In the mood to have sex with him but I am soo very self conscience about myself. I'm technically not a virgin but it was like 2 years ago. And he is double my size... Literally and I have to go on top cuz he will squish me. He's told me this, that when it happens I go on top. But how do I make myself feel more comfortable? Please please help me!! Thankyou so much!
Be you 14 or 16 my thinking is you are still way to young to be having sexual intercourse. Yes, your body is capable and yes you may or are feeling sexual urges. What you are not ready for or have not arrived at is the maturity level needed to have adult sexual relations.
I'm not going to lecture you any further. The self-consciousness you feel is two fold. First: it is a warning signal that you are not ready to have sex with him, for whatever reason. Second: Two months is not a long enough time to form the right emotional attachment needed to enter into a sexual relationship.
Remember one thing about teenage boys. They confuse lust with love. If they are forcing you or begging you for sex then it is not love but lust they have for you. This is not the emotional attachment you need to have a sexual relation with them.
When you are older you will be able to form emotional relationships faster then at your present age. This is because with maturity comes the wisdom of knowledge of choice or choosing.
For know listen to you emotions and leave the sex part out of this relationship.
if a person is living in an abusive home then they are the victims of sometimes name calling cruelty hitting cheap remarks insults why stay when there is a whole new path of life out there were you are freed from abuse men and women whom don't abuse or use people to their advantages if you are being abused or now of someone whom is there are shelters crisis centers doctors nurses clinics whom can help you
I'm really not sure what you're question is, or if you are asking a question. What you have written reads more like a statement rather than a question. Would you like to clarify what you are asking and submit. Them maybe we can give you an answer.
By the way what you have written is correct in what you have said.
18/f
So my boyfriend fingered me for the first time today and it HURT. What can I do to make it more comfortable?
Like anything else sex is a learned experience. Also anything two people do together requires communication, sex is no exception.
Now if it is possible that your boyfriend is inexperienced in these matters he could have been to rough . Most boys learn from watching porno movies or reading porno magazines. Unfortunately these films and stories all have one theme; which is to stick his fingers in the girl and use them as he might use his penis. Now if the girl is vaginal in nature this is fine. But many girls are clitoral in nature and need to have there clitoris stimulated. Also if you are experienced his sticking his fingers in you are going to hurt just as much as if he had put his penis in you.
Lack of communication is the killer of romance and first sexual contact between two people. If your a virgin or have not had much sexual contact then you need to communicate this to your partner. If he is being to rough and you are not enjoying what is happening tell him so. Slow him down , teach him how to love and make love to you.
We are all different and have different likes and dislikes. How is he or anyone suppose to know what a partners likes and dislikes are if you don't at the very least attempt to show them. This goes equally for the males.
If you do not know what you like and don't like. Go in your room, close and lock the door, undress, get in bed and make love to yourself. Your entire self. Let your hands play with your entire body. Find out for yourself what feels good and does not feel food. Yes this is called masturbating and there is nothing wrong with it. Not only does masturbating relive your sexual tension but it allows you to learn about your bodies pleasure centers. The same is again true for males.
Once you know how you like to be pleasured. You can then teach your partner and have a much more enjoyable sex life.
Hello!
I have to do a VCUG test, and I don't want to. I've done it twice and we have to do it again to see if my procedure(I think it's called Urinary Reflux) worked.
I don't want to! Is there some sort of way to make it not hurt as much? I'm a young girl and I think it'll hurt more because of my Reflux thing. Please help asap!!
Okay now that we know what is being done we can tell you a little more as to why it is being done and why it may burn afterwards.
From what I was able to read the procedure your parents are having done FOR YOU and TO YOU are the proper things to be done based on what may be wrong. It appears you may be suffering urinary tract infections cause by what we will call a birth defect in a valve in the urinary tract not working properly.
What you said was being inserted into your vagina is not being inserted into your vagina but into your urethra which is located just above vaginal opening. This is where you urine(pee) comes out. What they are inserting is a catheter through which they are able to put fluid into your bladder. The bladder is where urine is held until you release it when you go to the bathroom.
This is the cause of the pressure you feel and the burning you feel afterwards. Normally you would not be put to sleep for this procedure. I believe the doctors do so because you find this procedure so uncomfortable you may not be as cooperative as they need you to be. Nothing happens while your asleep other than a form of x ray is taken so the doctor can check to see if the valve I spoke of is operating properly.
That is the a brief explanation of the what and the why. The burning afterward is caused by the catheter they inserted into your urethra. One thing you can do to make things more comfortable for yourself is to ask mom to ask the doctor to use a smaller catheter and more lubrication or a different lubrication than they are using because of the burning afterwards.
You need to have this procedure done as it is in your best interest. How to avoid the pain before, during and afterwards is something I might be able to offer some help with.
As I told you before I too have to under go some painful procedures because of the chronic pain I suffer from. To help with the pain of the procedures the doctors will, depending on the procedure, give my wife some medication to give me before the procedure to calm me so that I am more relaxed when I arrive at the hospital. As some of the procedures require me to be almost awake during the procedure the doctors will continue to give me relaxation medication during the procedure. Before they finish they inject some numbing medication to help control the pain of the procedure afterwards.
Now sometimes in young people doctors for many different reasons don't like to give a lot of pain medication. You need to speak up for yourself and ask mom to tell the doctor and you need to tell the doctor that you need some medication to help you with this procedure.
As everyone feels pain differently doctors use a pain scale with numbers going from 1 to 10. 1 is the lowest number on the scale & 10 is the highest, being the worst pain you have ever felt. Use this scale to tell the doctor how much pain this procedure gives you and be honest about it. I'm positive once the doctors knows how much this procedure leaves you hurting they will do something to make you more comfortable.
I am 18/M.I heard from one of my friends that it's not good to have anal sex without using a condom.Is that true?.Because I started having anal sex with my fiance and hope to continue it.so wanna know about it.
The following URL should answer all your questions about Anal sex and the use of condoms.
http://www.everything-condoms.com/other_facts/anal_sex_questions_answers.htm
why have i started bleeding again after 12yrs of period free menopause?
That probably should not be happening. It is best if you check in with your Gynecologist.
hi im only 15 and my boyfreing wants to fuck me
should i do that or just give him head.
personly i dont want to do nether wat should i do
?
If your not ready for to do something, and this includes sex, then you should not do it. When it comes to sex no means no. If you are forced or compelled to provide sex for someone; that is the definition of rape, even if in the end you consent. Which by the way you are not, by law, you are not old enough to consent to having sexual relations.
If you're feeling that by not providing your boyfriend some form of sexual relief; IE: Head, handjob, intercourse, he will leave you. Then he is not in love with you he lusts for you.
Teenage boys from the time puberty strikes them searches for sexual relief. It is a hormonal thing, hence the term horny. In searching for sex teenage boys very much confuse lust and love.
If all this boy wants is sex and will leave you if he doesn't get it, then let him go for he does not have the proper respect for you.
This is a message about a recent question I asked you yesterday but with more information. I'm sorry for the length, but please help me. I NEED help.
So, hi! I had a treatment twice(i'm sorry, I don't know the name. Let's just call it treatment 1.) and they put a thing in my vagina. I think they called it a catheder, but it didn't look like one. It was a long, clear tube. Anyways, I had that treatment twice, now. And my parents told me I had to do it again. Well, I had a procedure(I don't know what this is called ;-( let's call it treatment 2.) where they put a pebble thing in(Or on) my vagina and they put me FULLY asleep. I'm afraid the treatment 2 will make the treatment 1 hurt more. The treatment 1 hurt a lot but it hurt worse the second time.
And I think when I didn't tighten my vagina(if you know what I mean) it didn't hurt as much. What do I do? I don't want to do this! My parents are forcing me to. They keep saying it's my last treatment but.. Uhhh! By the way, i'm not pregnant or it's not puberty. Please help as soon as you can!:(
I'm still not sure what the doctos are doing. I think it would help you cope better if you knew what the doctors are doing and why. If you are old enough to be having these procedures then I would think you are old enough to know what and why. Ask the doctors why this is being done. If you are over 14 the law may give you certain rights and controls over your body. At the very least you have the right to why.
After you get more information we can help you better
How deep does a penis go in a woman
According to the latest Ansel Research Survey; the average male penis when erect is between 5.1 & 5.9 inches long.
Keep in mind that this is the average, the middle between the largest and the smallest, above the micro-penis (below 2 inches in length). The survey states that size varies based on age, time of day, level of excitement and ambient temperature.
Average Vagina Size
Relaxed
Length 3 1/2 to 4 inches
Diameter 1 Inch
Aroused
Length ("tented) 5 to 6 inches
Diameter 1 1/2 to 2 inches
As you can see by the size chart of the average female vagina. Any penis over 6 inches in length and 2 inches in girth is larger than the average vagina can easily accommodate. A larger penis will cause a woman with an average sized vagina pain during intercourse, especially if the male is not a thoughtful and considerate lover.
Ok, well I have a "step" sister that has down syndrome and I can't stand it because she scares my friend and is annoying. She can be mean too. I've talk to my dad about her and my dad is engaged to her mom. I'm at the point of telling my dad, to pick me or her. I really need advice please help and thank you in advance
Anything is possible. I believe she responds to what she receives. If you are kind and loving to her she will be that way to you and maybe her brother if she sees a difference.
You are so wrong here.
First if you force your father to choose between you and the mother of your future step-sister you could be ruining any chance your father has for future happiness. For is forced to make a choice between you and his future wife, like most fathers, his choice will have to be you.
As to your your future step-sister. I have known a number of Downs Syndrome children and adults. All that I have met are usually a most loving type of individual. I am thinking she is reacting to how you and your friends may be treating her.
You and your father have a unique opportunity here to prove this girl with something she may never of had in the past. That being a warm and comforting home.
You did not state why she and her mother are searching for a new home or why you and your father are searching for a new home (home = family). What ever the reason is a warm loving home can be had from this union if you play the part of big sister or brother and protect and care for her. I can assure you she will return that love many fold over for that is what Downs Syndrome children provide to the family unit.
As for your friend, well they too need to understand she is different. Her being different is not something to be scared of. She needs to be treated differently but she can be a great friend too if they will allow her to be.
My advise: Don't ask your dad to choose. Learn to love your future step sister. If you do you will learn that you made the right choice in doing so.
The bottom of my boobs have been sore and im not sure why.
Could it be because my boobs are growing, or my bras getting small or what?..
I'm 17.
You may have very well answered your own question. There are two ways to find this out.
The first is to go to a department store such as Macy's or Lord and Taylor and find out when their bra fitter is there. Make an appointment with the fitter to be properly fitted with the correct size bra and cup. You would be surprised at how many women are wearing the wrong size.
Sometime ago my Cousin was the VP of North American sales for a major women's wear company. He showed me a statistical report his company did based on their fitters survey. Nearly 100% of the women they fitted were wearing the wrong sized bra. Based on this survey some mathematician came up with a percentage that some 90% of women wear the wrong size bra or are wearing their bra's incorrectly. I'm not sure how much trust to place in the number the mathematician came up with other than my own wife was one of the women wearing the wrong size and not wearing her bra correctly.
So the first thing you need to do is make sure you are wearing the right size and types of bra's. If after being properly fitted and buying the right bra's, by the way there is no charge for the fittings, you still have pain. The second thing to do is schedule a visit with your doctor, preferably your GYN.
Please help me! Nobody will!:(
Ok, so I have a problem with my vagina. It's not sexuallity or puberty, it's just something wrong with it.
Anyways, i've done a treatment twice:
1st time: Didn't really hurt
2nd time: hurt bad!!
Ok so then I had a worse treatment. Ok anyways, i'm doing the same treatment for the third time, and I don't want to. I'm scared that it'll hurt worse because that worse treatment I had(Lets call it TREATMENT #2) might make it feel more painful.
So what do I do? Go suicidal? Run away? What do I do? My parents won't let me not go. Please help. No one will help me ;(
In my private response to you it would have helped to have even this little bit of information.
Dangernerd is correct in everything he has said to you. If your problem is as he has described then please inbox him as you did me and let him help you.
I'm sure that your parents are doing what they think is best for you. This may not be totally true. Being fully informed is what is best and it sounds to me as if Dangernerd can help you with getting the information needed to make a fully informed decision. If this the problem you are having; inbox him please.
I'm so sorry for the length. I just really need help.
Hello! So, I have a problem with my body. I'm a girl but it has nothing to do with puberty.
Ok, you see... I've had this treatment 2 times now. It didn't hurt a lot during the first time, but it hurt worse the 2nd time. But then, I had a surgery on it.
I have to do the treatment(not the surgery) again, and i'm afraid it'll hurt worse.
What do I do? I'm scared and I don't want to do this! I told my parents I don't want to, but they said "This is your last visit. You HAVE to do this. You are almost done." But they don't know how much it hurts! Well, my mom had this treatment before...
Please help! This stuff is happening very soon!;(
Without information as to what the problem is and what the procedure is I really am at a loss as to what to say to you.
I will say this that what your parents have said is valid. You have gone through whatever this is twice before. As someone who suffers from chronic pain and goes through some painful procedures to help control the pain. I may know what you're feeling. Yes it is scary anytime you have to have a painful procedure done.
What I have found is that doctors sometimes are not aware of how much pain an individual patient actually feels. They may feel the pain the procedure produces is tolerable. I had this happen to me. When I spoke with the doctor and informed him that the procedure caused more pain than I could tolerate the doctor used some medication which allowed me to be almost asleep and feel little if any pain. It's unfortunate for me that I have to under go this procedure twice a year but now that the doctor knows he needs to medicate me for pain I don't fear the procedure as much.
So again, not knowing what the procedure is talk to your doctor and tell the doctor how much pain the procedure is causing you. I'm almost positive once the doctor is aware then medication can be used during the procedure and prescribed for after the procedure to reduce if not eliminate the pain. But you have to speak up and tell the doctor. Don't rely on anyone else to tell the doctor for the doctor needs to hear from you.
Hi. My Fiance' and I are trying to figure out a close estimate with what we would make a year once we finish our college education.
I'm going to be a labor & delivery nurse
and he is going to be a high school math teacher/basketball coach.
What is an estimate with what we would make a year; together?
We live in Tennessee. Close to Nashville, if that helps.
We are both doing things we love; so we wanna see if we are going to be okay finically.
Thank you!
This is really a hard question to answer. For instance your Fiance' salary can differ from school district to school district. Your salary will be about the same no matter where you work because Nurses are in such great demand.
Where I live a starting teachers salary can range from a low of $28K to $40K and that is in a radius of less than 50 miles. It just depends on if the teacher is in the inner city school, the teachers teaching credentials and how badly they need the subject the teacher is willing to teach. Coaching is extra curricular and schools do not have a lot of money for those things so the compensation is not as high as it use to be. Just a note here: I live in one of the richest counties in the Nation and our teachers are paid very well. Still a starting teachers salary does not allow for that teacher to afford to live in the county they are working in unless of course they have a wife like you who could be pulling in $50K to $75K a year at almost any hospital in the area.
Nashville like any other big city has been hurt by the recession. The best thing to do is to start looking at the different school systems in the counties, I believe the call them Parishes, and see what the teachers are paid. Then start looking at area hospitals and find out what they are advertising for nurses.
I know I haven't given you the information you are looking for but for what you want you need real numbers. For that you need to go to the source and it is available on line if you look for it. One thing you can bank on is that your income will be the bigger of the two as nurses are in short supply and the demand is high. Hospitals compete for nurses.
Hi guys, i am a 16 year old female, and i have always considered myself to be pretty optimistic. but lately i've got alot of stupid things going on and i feel like i'm in a funk. Kind of like it's depression. I am dating my brothers bestfriend, and he is dating mine (not to be hypocritical but it annoys me alot!) shes been my bestfriend for 8 years and i feel like i'm losing her to my brother, and my brother is 18 years old and moved out so i already feel like i lost my brother, and now i feel like i have lost him to my bestfriend. i just feel sad, and i cannot really leave my house to distract myself because i watch my younger brother every single day (no exaggeration.)there are other things here and there that bother me and it is all just building up and making me kind of sad. can someone just give me advice on how to keep that off my mind, so i can continue on to be my happy oh giddy self? thankyou much!
First of all I don't think you are depressed in the medical sense of the word. In fact you sound like a pretty normal teenager going through what a lot of teenagers go through at your age.
Your parents are using you as a live-in, unpaid, babysitter for a younger sibling. Is this fair to you? Probably not. Every parent with children will most likely have an older sibling watch the younger sibling(s) when both parents work out side the home. My parents did it to me, your grandparents may have done it with your parents and you will probably do it with your children. This is part of family life in western civilization today.
In a way this is also a complement to you. For if your parents did not trust you they would hire someone not only to watch your brother. You too would be watched by the sitter as well. Now that would really be depressing to a 16 year old, wouldn't you agree?
As for the other things you write about they are very normal and something you need to adapt to as these things will continue to happen in different forms as you travel through life. Friends will go off to college. You will make new friends. These friends will take job offers in other parts of the country or marry people and hang out with other married couples while you may still be single. People change jobs and move to different parts of the country.
You really haven't lost these people. They have made new social circles but you can find away to stay close to them. But you have to make the first move. Then it is up to you and them to make your relationship stay intact.
ok so now I forgot to say my teacher was a social worker so um ya
Please call 1-800-656-HOPE. I recommended you contact an organization called RAINN. This stands for Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network. They operate a 24/7 hotline you can call to talk with people who will listen and give you advice. They will also offer to find people in your home town to help you deal with what has happened to you.
Without having the ability to talk to you one on one and not being a professional counselor. The advise I have given you is the best advise I can offer you. The people at RAINN are trained and are able to offer you the type of help I cannot. So please call them and talk with them. They can give you the direction and type of help I cannot.
Please remember one thing over all else. You are a victim here. There is nothing you said or did that gave your brother in-law the right to abuse you as he did. In my mind he is a felon and child molester. Your parents should back you up on this. If you are over 14 you can go to the police on your own and report him if you like. This may be what you need to feel safe. The people at RAINN can help you with this decision.
About a month ago i hooked up with a co worker (we are both married with children) and have been traveling extensively with him so the sex has continued. However, he has been flirting extensively with another co worker (which I happen to be her supervisor). He said he was doing it to protect our relationship so no one would suspect anything. Well i found out that he actually spent the night with her last night. I feel completely blindsided, hurt, and jealous. How do I approach talking to him because i don't feel like I have a right to feel that way.
Have you ever heard the expression never shit where you eat. The reason for this expression is exactly the reason you find yourself in know. A married with children women, having an affair with a married with children man who is not only cheating on her but telling her he is doing so to protect her. Now if you believe him I have some very wet land in Florida I would like to sell you.
My advise is to pull up you panties and only take them off for the man you married. Do not hold the affair your subordinate is having with this man against her as this would be sexual harassment against you.
Having an extramarital relationship is never the right thing to do. Having one with a co-worker is always wrong even if if both of you are single having an affair with a co-worker is counter productive.
If your home life is bad either seek marital counseling or a divorce lawyer. Staying married for the benefit of the children always hurts the children. You would be surprised what the children are capable of seeing and understanding even when you attempt to hide things from them.
hello im a 13year old girl and i live with my mum and dad;i dont have any siblings.a couple of years ago my parents seperated for about a year because my mum found out that my dad was cheating on her...theyve been back together now for the past 6 years but i fear my dad is still cheating on her.
a few days ago i went on my dad's phone to text my mum and i saw in the contacts list somebody called 'sexymama'.seeing the name i was curious who this was so i looked at the conversation with her and my dad.the conversation was quiet disturbing!also i did a bit of digging on my dad's computer and found a photo of a naked woman and a semi-naked woman.i went on the history list on his computer and found loads of websites which are pornos.
i feel really depressed about this and want to tell my mum but she has bipolaria so i dont want to because last time she found out he was cheating(when i was 6) we moved out and my mum had to go to hospital and i had to stay with my granparents...also my mum makes most of the money in our house because my dad isnt payed very much at all.what should i do please help!
thankyou
Your a little to young to fully understand what I am about to tell you. So please trust that what I am telling you is in my mind in your best interest.
It is very possible that based on something that has happened in the past you are making a mountain out of something that may not exists. With mom being bi polar their sex life may not be exactly what the sex life of people their age should be.
If I am correct the looking at porn is a natural and safe outlet for pent up sexual urges. The sexymama could be just a nick name for a female friend, non sexual or it could be a sex line number. Both of these would be normal for a man who is living with a woman with a bi polar condition.
You have made an assumption based on past performance. When you break the word down it say it makes an; as/u/me.
My advice for now is do and say nothing. Observe what dad does. If he is home every night, cares for your mother as a husband should, is not spending money he should not be spending. Then my assumption of mountains out of mole hills is probably correct. Why disturb mom and possibly send her into a manic depression if all you have for evidence is porn sites and a weird name on his phone. None of this is true evidence he is cheating on your mother.
How can I do to build confidence? I have a boyfriend I trully love,but I don't trust him at all,it's like I try to do it,but I just can't get it,I feel like I won't trust him ever again in my life,why is it so hard to trust again?What could I do?Thanks!!!
I think there is more to this question then you are telling us. Something has happened to you with a prior boyfriend or possibly this boyfriend that has caused you to put up your safety shield of trust. Without knowing what this is I am hard pressed to tell you how to go about fixing this.
If your current boyfriend is not the cause of your trust issues. If you do not see in him the cause of your trust issues then communicating to him what they are could be a good starting point in building a trusting relationship with him.
This is the best advise I can offer for the moment without knowing the other side of the problem. One other thing; we are not all a like. Just because one person has caused you to loose faith in him or her. That does not mean all people will cause you the same type of hurt.. Just something to think about.