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my dad is cheating on my mum,what should i do?
hello im a 13year old girl and i live with my mum and dad;i dont have any siblings.a couple of years ago my parents seperated for about a year because my mum found out that my dad was cheating on her...theyve been back together now for the past 6 years but i fear my dad is still cheating on her.
a few days ago i went on my dad's phone to text my mum and i saw in the contacts list somebody called 'sexymama'.seeing the name i was curious who this was so i looked at the conversation with her and my dad.the conversation was quiet disturbing!also i did a bit of digging on my dad's computer and found a photo of a naked woman and a semi-naked woman.i went on the history list on his computer and found loads of websites which are pornos.
i feel really depressed about this and want to tell my mum but she has bipolaria so i dont want to because last time she found out he was cheating(when i was 6) we moved out and my mum had to go to hospital and i had to stay with my granparents...also my mum makes most of the money in our house because my dad isnt payed very much at all.what should i do please help!
thankyou
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Sorry to say but I disagreee with adviceman49.
Your mother's bipolar condition has nothing to do with whether or not it would be okay for your dad to cheat on your mom. And no, having a sexual texting relationship with another woman is certainly NOT "normal" for the husband of a woman who is bipolar, and honestly how that makes sense in anyone's mind is beyond me.
But I do agree that at 13, you are very young, much too young to be put in a difficult position such as this one. I don't think you should get in the middle of this, and I definitely don't think you should go and tell your mom about this.
A lot of it is assumption. I hate to say this to a 13-year-old, but watching porn is not necessarily a bad thing and it doesn't mean that your dad is cheating on your mom. It's just a sexual release, something you may not understand until you're older.
BUT, there is still the matter of "sexymama". Honestly, I really don't think it's just a "nickname for a friend"; that's ridiculous, and that's inappropriate anyway. You say you read the text conversations and they were inappropriate. I did say you shouldn't get in the middle of this, but if anything, I would talk to your dad about this rather than your mom. I suppose, but because it seems that the situation is taking its toll on you, it may not hurt to confront your dad, so that way, he can know how you feel and maybe do something about his behavior, or clear it up if it really is just a misunderstanding.
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Your a little to young to fully understand what I am about to tell you. So please trust that what I am telling you is in my mind in your best interest.
It is very possible that based on something that has happened in the past you are making a mountain out of something that may not exists. With mom being bi polar their sex life may not be exactly what the sex life of people their age should be.
If I am correct the looking at porn is a natural and safe outlet for pent up sexual urges. The sexymama could be just a nick name for a female friend, non sexual or it could be a sex line number. Both of these would be normal for a man who is living with a woman with a bi polar condition.
You have made an assumption based on past performance. When you break the word down it say it makes an; as/u/me.
My advice for now is do and say nothing. Observe what dad does. If he is home every night, cares for your mother as a husband should, is not spending money he should not be spending. Then my assumption of mountains out of mole hills is probably correct. Why disturb mom and possibly send her into a manic depression if all you have for evidence is porn sites and a weird name on his phone. None of this is true evidence he is cheating on your mother.
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