ok i have been rated 8 times ( i just started today haha) ne*way on the front of my page it says "rated: 5 times" not 8...hmm do u kno why?? u can see for urself haha http://advicenators.com/column.php?u=Xo_ShErRy_Ox
just wondering, thanks and i'll rate!:)
There is a script that runs daily, so your ratings will automatically be updated tomorrow. If you really want to see what your up to date average rating is, you can go to http://advicenators.com/tools.php?feedback=1& and it will calculate it (you need to be logged in).
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my friend pat just told me my friend jessica hates me. she hates me cuz i told pat something she did while she was sleeping over my house. well pat says she was so mad she was swearing and stuff. i feel really bad and want to call and say sorry but pat says she will probably yell at me and hang up. whenever jessica and i have fights they are usually easily resolved, and im hoping pat is exaggerating, he does a lot. im mad that pat told jessica he knew, but i know im mostly to blame. so what should i do now? please help me, i hate losing friends :(
Apologising is best, even if you don't think Jessica will take it well immediately. You need to show your friends that you are genuinely sorry rather than just sorry that she found out. Hopefully in time Jessica will see that you ae remorseful and will value your friendship once again.
It's also worth examining how this managed to happen. You told a friend (Pat) about what another friend (Jessica) did, an action Jessica obviously thought was a betrayal of trust. Ask yourself some questions: has this happened before? Has it caused probolems before? Would you be annoyed if another friend did the same to you? etc. Hopefully some reflection on your part will help you see where things went wrong, and will stop similar upsets happening in future. I hope you manage to talk successfully with both Jessica and Pat about things. Good luck!
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so ever since my boyfriend dumped me ((about 4 days ago)) ive been having thots and dreams that sum1 is out to kill me.
i keep thinking that sum1 is guna come in my bedroom and shoot me or sumthin. i know this isnt normal, and im so confused why this is happening!
im scaring myself but i can help it! *i rate*
Dreams are very strange things. They can sometimes be random, and sometimes reflect your subconcious thoughts. I wouldn't take your dreams literally, even if they are reoccuring ones. You could investigate the symbols in your dreams - for example, being 'hunted' in that somebody is trying to chase you to hurt you signifies stres and worry in your waking life that you are trying to escape from, dreaming of your own death can indicated the anticipation of an end of a period on your life, whereas your bedroom is symbolic of your own personal, private space. Google 'dream analysis' and you'll find lots of interesting and relevant sites.
That these thoughts plague you during the day is slightly more worrying - are you just thinking about your dreams, or are you actually worried this man will hurt you? If it's just your dreams worrying you in your waking hours, I wouldn't worry about it, but if you actually fear violence from this boy, talk to somebody about your concerns.
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Do girls ever go for a younger guy? I'm 17 and going into grade 12 this year, this other girl I know is 18 and going into college. I met her at the beginning of the last school year, and at the time I thought there was NO way. She was VERY good looking, a year older than me, basically just out of my league. But over the year we talked a lot, and then this summer we've hung out quite a bit. I can't tell if this is just a friend thing or not, I've never known a guy that dated an older girl and was just wondering what your opinions on it were. Thanks.
There aren't any rules about what guys / girls go for - she may well like you as more than a friend despite your age. One year isn't a really big age gap, so this could work. However, as she's going into college, you might proceed with caution and try and work out if the interest is mutual by flirting, because she might want to start college single. But don't put yourself down so much by worrying about your age and her being 'out of your league' - if you get along well and have been hanging out she might well like you. Good luck!
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ok well my boyfriend wants to have like alot of sex you know and I'm not ready for that yet but once he pushed me when I said no and he yelled at me and just left I don't know why but I'm scared to say no to him and I'm doing sumthing with him tonight I need serious help
Krizzyxx9 said it best, I think. You have every right to say no. If he won't accept that, then he is absusing you. If he has sex without your consent, or bullies a 'consent' out of you by either physical or emotional coercion, that is rape. You do not want to be in a relationship with a person capable of physically and sexually assaulting you. You've said yourself you are scared of him - please, please, get out of this now. Talk to somebody who is close to you, and have them with you when you call him and tell him you are not seeing him any more for emotional support. I will you all the best.
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Hey, well all girls know you should only have your period like every 28 days or something, well ive had my period since i was 11 and now im 14, well its usually pretty on schedule other than maybe a few days, and i have a long period sometimes but no big problems, well inthe past 6 weeks, and now 7 i have had my period 3 times. the first time it was just a little and last about 4 days. then the second time was 2 weeks after and i got the worst cramps like ever, and i usually dont get cramps and it lasted about 5 days and was a regular flow. well then 3 weeks later i have started again and im on still and its lasted about 8 days now, and the first 6 were ALL HEAVY like really really bad, and then i thought it was over and then when i woke up... nope and so now its back and its just a little but what should i do? should i go to the doctor? or what? thanx bunches!
It's probably nothing, but as your periods had been regular until recently it's worth speaking to your doctor about it for reassurance. If it's worrying you, it's always better to ask your doctor, who will know a lot more about medicine than any of us. :)
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Okay, the thing is, I'm confused. I know this is going to sound stupid, but I need to ask. People are always asking about tips on kissing and making out. I've never done either of those things, but what gets me muddled is the whole 'it comes naturally' thing. I mean, is it really based on instinct, or should i be worried about my first time doing all those things? (I'm having a hard time getting my point across here, work with me). People ask things like 'where should i put my hands' and 'what kind of kiss' and 'how do you french'. Are those things that you really need advice about, or do they really all come naturally and people only fret because they haven't done them? Is it better to have people tell you how-to's so it'll go better, or is it all going to come together anyway? I hope you don't find me too silly for asking, I'm just(like I stated before) confused! Thank you to all who choose to answer
It's natural to feel slightly apprehensive about kissing when you haven't done it, simply because it is unchartered territory. In such circumstances, people often want advice about what 'should' happen just to be reassured that they're normal. They don't ask for advice because they don't know what to do physically, I would imagine, because it is a pretty instinctual thing, but rather because, emotionally, they need reassurance that it isn't scary and they will be okay without choreographising the whole thing.
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whenever i talk with my friends and stuff and they gossip about "ooh so and so got to this base"... im always kind of the one who is wondering... "what does that mean"... like im not SLOW in that department i just wanna know what each base means (no im not talking about baseball)... im not super young, ive heard just different explanations of the bases and i wanna know THE ULTIMATE BASE LINGO. if you catch my draft ;O)... thanks for whoever gives advice!
-signed, catchmeup
I've heard different answers too, but the one I've heard most commonly is first base is 'french' kissing and second is 'heavy petting', i.e. touching the girls breasts. The debate usually comes in about what's second and third, but most people I asked said it was anything involving the genitals (including mutual masturbation), although others say only oral sex counts as third base and so mutual masturbation counts as second. Fourth or 'home' base is fairly obviously full sexual intercourse. :)
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Theres this one inparticular guy (16) that i REALLY like a lot. Ive known him for 2 years and we've been great friends and more. ne wayz, he has problems stayin commited and keeping to one girl. Every time we make out i find out from someone else that he has a girlfriend and I feel like Im helping him cheat. my sister says forget about him, but its not that easy. what do i do?
This guy definitely isn't worth your time if he's done this repeatedly. It's hard to do, but you need to pull yourself away from this guy, or you'll just get burnt in the future when he does it again (or, just as hurtfully, cheats on you). It'll be hard to do, as you have a relationship, history and rapport with this guy, but you need to distance yourself from him and avoid situations when you are likely to end up making out with him or be alone with him until you are sufficiently over him to be able to turn him down even when you are tempted, because you deserve better than a guy like this. Good luck.
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hey my hair is a blondeish color now..got that way from the sun...i have nothing against blonde hair on other people, i just don't like the way it looks on me. i have kind of pale skin, and dark brown eyes. my hair is 2 inches longer than shoulder length and very layered and straight. does anyone have any good hair colors i could dye it while still looking natural? like i mean specific colors--not "brown" or "red"...like maybe a color on a dying kit and the number of it
I couldn't give you an exact shade which would suit you without looking at your colouring, but I think if your pale and naturally blonde, dark tones would probably look too severe on you and would mean you'd have to wear a lot of makeup to look 'natural'. I think a light brown honey or caramel tone would be a good thing to start with - it's close to your natural colour and so won't look drastic (and won't look too bad if you grow it out) and is likely to flatter your pale skin. As for which dye kits to use, L'Oreal have a good selection of colours, as to Clairol, if that's avaliable where you are. Good luck!
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my boyfriend and i r really good friends in fact were neighbors! lol ok heres my question my boyfriend asked my friend to ask me if i would ever make out with my boyfriend and i said yes and so i know i should b expecting it but when it does happen wat do i do do i kiss him back b/c i love him so much or should he just kiss me and should i just look at him and say i love you! and this would b my first kiss and i need to no wat do i do?!?!!? PLEASE HELP!
thanks,
sweetheart00
Firstly, relax! Your first kiss is nervewracking, but it all comes quite naturally. He's probably working up the courage to kiss you if he asked your friend about kissing you, so just make it clear your interested! Stand close to him when you are talking, give him flirtacious looks and be tactile with him (for example, touch his arm when he says something amusing) and he should get the idea and kiss you. From there, just relax, take it slowly and do what comes naturally. Good luck!
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My husband and I are adopting a cat today from the Humane Society. The cat is 4 years old, and has not been declawed. I feel it would be inhumane to do declaw her, but I am worried about her scratching my furniture, and me as well. Does anyone have any alternitives to declawing, or how to prevent her from scratching the furniture.
And any other tips for a new cat owner would be appriciated.
I remember in an episode of 'Queer Eye for the Straight Guy' where a guy had a problem with his cats scratching his furniture they gave the cats rubber tips which went over their claws. They could still run and jump and live normally, but they didn't scratch the furniture. I tried scouring the recent tips on the website though, and I couldn't find it, so I can't give you a name of a product, but I'm sure if you talk to a vet they'll be able to recommend you a company who make them.
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umm im 14 and im only a 36A nd all my firends are a yr younger nd the same size as me!!i think that im done growing is there ne way that i can tell if i am or not?? thnnx
Girl's breasts normally don't finish growing until they are nearly twenty, although things do vary from woman to woman due to genetics. If you are worried about how big your breasts will be, a good indication is the size of your mother's breasts - if they are a lot bigger than yours, chances are you've still got some growing to do. I seriously wouldn't worry about it too much though - comparing yourself to others won't get you anywhere.
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I just started using tampons. And when i wear them they hurt like heck. Did i not have it in all the way or what? please help!
You shouldn't be able to feel a tampon when it's inside you. If you can and it's painful, then it isn't in right. Just try and relax and carefully read the instruction leaflet. Being relaxed is the most important thing, as otherwise you will be tense and clench the muscles, which will make the whole operation even more difficult. If you are having trouble getting it right, try first with a small/slim tampon for a low flow - this will be easier to insert than one designed for a heavy flow. Good luck!
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ok i have a long distance g/f im talkin outastate ne way i call her alota and she means the world to me i could go on and on about her but there is 1 prob i have only seen 1 pic of her and im not even sure thats her and i prob wont ever see her in person what do i do???
plz get back to me
I think long distance relationships can work for some people, but you really need to talk to her about how things are going to work between you, or the entire thing is doomed to failure. You both need to talk honestly about whether you can be a couple when you are unlikely to ever see each other in person. You might decided that, although you are very close emotionally, you can't really be boyfriend and girlfriend whilst there's no chance you can see each other, but decide thats open to change in the future. However, if you do decide that you want to continue along your current route of being together, then you need to be honest, be able to trust each other, and be able to communicate about your problems - you could start by talking about the picture she's sent you and whether it's really her - because, honestly, if you don't see her and you don't trust that she's telilng the truth about herself, then what exactly is the basis of your relationship?
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i have a hight fever and have been bleeding with pain and i'm not menistrating.
The depo shot can mess up your cycle so the bleeding you are experiencing could easily be a result of that, but you should definitely see a doctor anyway as quickly as possible if you think your fever and pain are contected to this bleeding, as that doesn't sound good.
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how to you rate a columnist and how do you see what you are rated?
Others have answered how you rate other people's responses, so I'll answer your other query. To see how the advice you've been given has been rated, you need to go to your advice column and click on 'view feedback'. This will be http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?mode=feedback&u=yourusername - once you've been rated more than 5 times, your average rating will be shown.
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what are the "bases"?...you know like 1st 2nd 3rd 4th, what do they mean.Like when people say "I went to 3rd base with him" or sumthin like that.
First base is 'french' kissing and second is 'heavy petting', i.e. touching the girls breasts. There is some debate about what actually constitutes third base - some say it's anything involving the genitals (including mutual masturbation), whilst others say only oral sex counts as third base. Fourth or 'home' base is full sexual intercourse. But talking about 'bases' is misleading anyway - there is no set pattern about what order people progress in - some people find that oral sex (third base) is even more personal than intercourse, and don't experiment with it until after they've had sex (or at all, in some cases). It's useful to know what the bases are just for intepreting what people are talking about, but I wouldn't pay too much attention to them other than for that purpose.
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is it okay for a girl to ask a guy out?
Of course! That's the great thing about living in the 21st century - you can be assertive and get what you want. I say go for it!
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this question is for my friend:
my boyfriend is so sweet. he'd never cheat on me and he never acts Interested in another girls or stuff like that. do you think he could be gay? because he doesn't seem to be interested when girls are wearing skimpy clothes on tv or pictures and id ont think he looks at it on his own. but he gets horny around me. i don't think he is but soemtimes i wonder.
It's a sad world where when a guy respects you and the women around him, you guess it might be because he's gay. Not objectifying women doesn't make him gay, it makes him a decent guy. Is there any actual evidence that might make you suspect he's homosexual or bisexual? Does he check out guys in a way that he doesn't look at you? If he did, then that might be reason to sit him down and ask him if he'd even thought about his sexuality, but from just the information you've given, I don't really think you have a problem. Just relax and enjoy it!
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