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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
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I'm in middle school and i know a lot of people change in middle school but my friends have changed a lot. A lot of them curse now and it's really annoying because I HATE unnecessary cursing! And the just curse for know reason! And then one of my friends who actually goes to church with me used the f word and then put god right after it. I was like "REALLY?!?!". I mean I understand there's a lot going on with her parents and stuff and I've been supportive of that but know she curses and it's really annoying some of my friends have stopped when I don't them I don't like it but I would hate to loose a friend because the curse. :(
I agree with you that it is not necessary to make yourself understood by injecting curse words into your conversation. In fact my personal belief is it is a poor individual who needs to curse to make their point.
Be that as it may you and I are in the minority when it comes to this point. Most teenagers think they are being very adult by using these words. Most adults think they are emphasizing their point by using these worlds.
Before I retired I worked as a field sales representative for a national manufacturer. I spent half my time on job sites and the other half of my time in people's offices. Because of this I made an effort not to curse. At a national sales meeting one of the other sales reps said something about never hearing me curse. My boss, who was standing next to me said he had he never had either.
I told them I know all the words I chose not to use them because I don't want to become confused and use them in the wrong setting. Besides I am perfectly capable of making my point without using them.
Moral of my story is this. You are not going to change the world. You are not going to change your girlfriend. The only thing you can control is your little piece of the world. My boss and others who knew me chose not to curse or at least attempted not to curse when around me. It was actually a little comical to watch them try not to. It didn't bother me if they did. I chose not to out of respect for those who may not like to hear those words. Others had to make that choice for themselves.
The choice you have to make is can you put up with our friends 4 letter aria or can she learn to tone it down when around you. For her it is called respect. For you it is called tolerance.
I am a thirteen year old girl. Since I will talk about my siblings, their ages are 5,6,10,&14.
My mother is normal, it's not her I'm concerned about it's my father. He is usually playful, fun and gives us treats on occassion but a few times a week he gets violent. He drinks and gets violent. He'll mean to be playful and end up being to rough and hurting us. But since we are hurr real bad, we cry and he freaks out screaming at us and sending us to bed for crying. My autistic brother whom is fourteen (lets call him C). C picks his nose and sucks his fingers. When he does so, my dad will slap C, curse, or just be like "WASH YOUR EFFIN HANDS!!!! IF I EVER SEE THAT AGAIN ILL BREAK YOUR FINGERS!!!!!" And when dad makes my siblings cry, I cry and get yelled at. Just last night my dad hurt my brother, I cried and got sent to my room. My dad called my other brother who wasnt crying to watch a movie with him instead. And when he called my brothet upstairs he said "Luke shut your freak sisters bedroom door!!!!" Why am I a freak for crying. My mom cant really do anything because shes very tiny (like only 110 pounds) and my dad is 250 pound man. She will usually just say "Why dont you guys just go play outside?" Or "is it bedtime yet? Why dont you guys go to bed?"
So is this an abusive father or just a strict one? Should I talk to him or seek outside help?
If your dad is only this way when he drinks, then he has a drinking problem and is probably an alcoholic. Most alcoholics will not admit they have a problem and therein lies the problem you face. Until your dad admits he has a problem with alcohol there is nothing you can do or say that will make him admit it or cause him to change. In fact if you were to accuse him of being an alcoholic or problem drinker you would only make more trouble for yourself.
This does not mean there is not things you can not do to get help. There are several way for you to get help. First with school opening you can go to a trusted teacher or your school principal and tell them what is happening at home. If they agree your home life is abusive there are plans in place for them to follow to get help for you and your siblings.
Living with an abusive alcoholic parent or relative is tough. There is an organization, a self-help group call Al-Anon and Al-A-teen which you can join. They have meetings in just about every community across the country. In these meetings you will meet people your age , younger and older who face the same problems as you have. You will learn from them how they are handling their problem and see what might work for you. Al-A-Teen is for you. Al-Anon would be for mom if you can convince her to go to a meeting.
Below is the URL to the meeting locator page for the Al-Anon group. Find your state and click on it, then your town or the town closest to you.
http://al-anon.alateen.org/local-meetings
There is a fine line between abuse and discipline. It is okay fro a parent to discipline a child and even to smack them on the butt or spank them. It is not okay for a parent to hit a child with a closed fist or on the head.
If dad was to hit any of you with a closed fist anywhere on your bodies or to smack you in the face or head this is not discipline, this is child abuse and you would be justified in calling 911 for help.
If you need to you do so and you tell the call taker everything that is happening now. Such as Dad is hitting you, your siblings in the head or body with his fists. This allows the call taker to send the police and fire department to your home. Dad cannot turn them away. The fire department EMT"s must provide you and your siblings with medical attention and tell the police if they need to toke you to doctors for further attention. The police of course will handle dad based on what the EMT's tell them.
Don't be afraid to call 911 if you need to . Alcoholics need to hit bottom before they ask for help. If you need to call for help for you or any of your siblings this may be just what dad need to recognize he has a drinking problem.
Understand one thing though. Alcohol makes people act very strange. Particularly those who do not tolerate it well. Regardless of why dad drinks and what it does to him. In his own way he still loves you and your brothers and sisters.
I know this may sound a little funny and crazy if you want, but I'm really worried about this situation since it's gotten out of control. I just love and cannot help showing off my buttocks. It's like I need to do it; it fills me with so much pleasure and adrenaline. The men who pass by and get to watch it pretty much cannot believe it. I tend to wear a thong anytime I go out in the middle of the day or night to put up this obscene show on the streets. Today I locked myself into the bathroom and burst into tears. I'm running a terrible danger and I cannot talk to anyone about this. I have a boyfriend, who of course does not know anything about this. I'd appreciate any kind of help that helps me get rid of this nasty and dangerous habit. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I need help..
Yes this is a dangerous activity, one that could get you seriously hurt or worse. From what you have written and the way you have written it I do not think this problem can be overcome without professional help.
In one sense what you have is a sexual fetish. Most sexual fetishes are harmless as they are not harmful to you or anyone else. Sometimes a sexual fetish can even be enjoyed between you and a romantic partner. While this particular fetish might be shared between you and the right partner it is still a very dangerous fetish for you and a partner if you were to share with one.
I would suggest you seek the help of a qualified sexual therapist, a psychologist to help you find out why you need to do this. One of the reasons is the reason you write about; which is the pleasure you get from the adrenaline rush you get when exposing yourself.
Adrenaline and the rush they give can be quite addictive, even more so than some illegal drugs. There are better safer ways to get this type of rush. More importantly is to find out why you need this kind of rush which is what working with a psychologist can help with. Once you find out the reason you can also find out how to harness the reason and find a safer way to get that same adrenaline rush.
I hope you will take my advise and seek help with a qualified therapist. Your EAP program at work will pay for the first few sessions. Everything that is said in therapy stays in therapy as it is totally confidential. No one will ever know what is said between you and your therapist unless you tell them.
For the past several months my boyfriend and I have been apartment hunting. There was one place we just fell in love with though it's expensive for a one bedroom because it's considered "Luxury".
Everybody's been telling us not to do it because we won't be able to afford it but we're not the typical couple.
He has two jobs working about 50-70 hours a week and I work one job at two places and work 36-40 hours a week but I make more than him an hour.
Together we make around $3,400 a month, 43,000 a year and I'd like to start doing some wide work as well just to fill up the empty hours so I'm not bored and lonely when he's at work.
Finance wise (monthly), Rent is $758, renters insurance $20 Electric around $300, High Speed Internet will be around $70, Groceries around $200, we don't want cable TV since we have Netflix through a family account,
My car payments are $316, his car insurance is $130 mine is $160. Both of our cellphone bills together are $90. Gas is about $150 for both cars (I have a hybrid). I know there are other bills that I can't think of right now but with what I've already taken out above that still leaves $1,006 a month free.
What other expenses should I be looking at?
How can we go about getting good quality furniture for not sky high prices? We already have a dining room table with chairs, a dresser, a book case, a sofa, an HD TV, a Macbook Air, a desk. The apartment comes with a fridge, freezer,dishwasher, washer and dryer in the apartment, oven, microwave, lots of cabinets and counter space and two walk in closets.
One think you need to consider is health insurance, not listed in you budget. Starting next year both of you if not covered by an employer health insurance plan will need to buy insurance through the Health Insurance initiative or pay a $2,000 each.
Your electric bill seems a bit high for a one bedroom apartment. You would be well served to shop around for another electric company to provide your electric who has lower rates. It easy to do and really it is just a billing process. The local utility still provides and services the electric lines.
Your food budget is quite low. According to your budget you plan to eat for less than $6.66 a day for the both of you. That's not only pretty stingy but I don't see you providing a proper diet on that amount. In your food budget you not only have to include the food you eat at home but the food costs away from home at work. I would estimate your daily food cost to be more in the area $25.00 a day for the two of you or $750 a month and that is still fairly tight.
IF my food budget number is closer to being correct then you surplus each month is reduced to $456 which if you have to buy health insurance will most likely be wiped out or significantly reduced.
A place to save money might be on your car insurance. Talk to your agents and see if you insure your cars under one policy if you can see if this saves you money. Another place would be to see if you can refinance your car and lower your payment.
I don't know where you live but $758 for a one bedroom "Luxury Apartment" based on where I live is a steal. I'm not saying you shouldn't take the apartment, that's not my call. I think you need to take another look at your budget and make a more realistic one. Some of your estimates are to my thinking and living area way off. You also left off things like health insurance which is now mandated if not provided by an employer. A clothing allowance, as well as an entertainment allowance was left out.
Man does not live by bread alone as the saying goes. You cannot expect to sit home each night and watch Netflix. There are going to be times you want to go out with friends. You need to budget for these things and times.
I have a lump inside my right labia , been there for a few years. Started out small but grew during my pregnancy last year. Its not painful , but knowing itd there is really uncomfortable for me. I was told it may be an herpes outbreak since i have genital herpes but for 3 years ? Im scared it may be a sign of cancer.
Ive told my doctor when i first noticed it but it was.small back then , he said he didnt see or feel anything its not a hard lump . Ive also had problems with discharge i always go to my doctor to check for stds and i
Turn out clean but still always a white discharge. Its so annoying.
It is probably a cyst. If it feels like it is just under the skin and you can move it about within the lump area that is what it is most likely is. I have several of these type cysts on different parts of my body and they have very long names which at first hearing sound cancerous though they are not.
I have seen both my family doctor and a surgeon I trust about them and the answer to my question as to whether they should be removed is. This surgery is entirely elective as for as long as they remain the size they have seen and are not causing me any pain there is no need to remove them.
Given where yours is a would think a doctor would want to remove them regardless of whether or not pain is involved. For I would think the simple fact that intercourse could cause them to rupture or leak. Which may be why you are seeing discharge.
Since your present doctor seems to feel these are either nothing to worry about or part of your genital herpes. I fully believe a second opinion by another doctor, GYN is in order.
If you're not sure of who to see call your insurance company and ask for another GYN they can recommend in you area to see. Insurance companies will and must pay for second opinions. You might also ask for a gynecological surgeon you could see.
One thing I would not do is worry that this is cancer. From what you describe, while not a doctor, it sounds very much like the cysts I have. Though I fully believe a second opinion is in order.
I am gitting married nexd yr. and is it bad to let him is you nude and to have sex befor you get married?
This is a very personal question in that it is solely based on your beliefs. Beliefs that are based in religious upbringing,family heritage and personal beliefs.
In most of the western world the majority of the brides today do not go to their marriage bed virgins. Women are marrying later in life and as such are enjoying a full sex life before marriage. Inherently modern society has come to accept this as part of the norm.
In the same vain society is happy to see that the average age that teenage women are losing their virginity is rising, which is a good thing. The number of teenage pregnancies is still too high. The number of teenagers no longer virgins at graduation from high school is upwards of 70%-80% a number most feel is too high.
This is somewhat of a conundrum in that as a society we accept premarital sex but only in certain situations and certain age groups.
At 17 you are most likely over the age of consent in your state. Meaning you legally can consent to having sex. Whether you have sex before marriage has to be you decision no one can make that decision for you. Of course if you have sex then your fiancé will see you naked.
Should you decide to have sex with your fiancé then I suggest before you do that you your gynecologist and get birth control medication. You are by law old enough to see a doctor on your own without parental knowledge or consent for matters of reproductive health. The law is a Federal Law called HIPPA. Because of this law you can ask for and be prescribed birth control medication without parental consent. You should also make sure your fiancé uses a condom as well until you are married and both of you have had blood tests.
I wanna get rid of my bad smell in vigina and my mouth also stinks a lot so I wanna get rid of these two things.
We are talking about two different odors here.
Bad breath: Bad Breath is caused by a number of different things. Primary causes are our diets. The foods we eat can cause bad breath. Spicy, food high in garlic, fish and other foods. Gum disease and bad teeth are another cause for bad breath.
If the foods you eat are the cause of your breath problem then a change in diet will help or using breath freshener and brushing your teeth after meals will also help. Gum disease and bad teeth is something only a dentist can detect and correct. If you cannot brush after each meal carry a floss stick with you and floss after eating as decaying or trapped food is another cause.
Vaginal Scent: Women are suppose to have a vaginal scent. It is part of the animalistic part of sexual attraction. Now that scent will be stronger in some women and weaker in others. In part it will be due to your overall physiology which is somewhat based on your diet.
Regardless of the why or strength of your scent you should not be able to smell yourself if you bathe regularly with plain soap and water. Your vagina has its own ecosystem and to douche disrupts that eco system which could account for the odor if you have been doing so.
The smell or odor given off by a women should be somewhat musky but not offensive. To us males something in the muskiness of this smell is very inviting or attracting to us which I'm not sure you will notice of your own scent.
If your scent is so strong you can smell yourself while fully dressed, then something is wrong. You may have a UTI or a yeast infection. The best person to ask about this is mom. Remember one thing about mom. She is built exactly like you are and she had the exact same question about herself that you are having when she was your age.
These questions you have asked, especially this part, have nothing to do with sex and everything to do with your reproductive health. These problems you have written to us about are no different than if you had a sore throat. You would go to mom and tell her or if you had some aches and pains you would talk to mom about them.
Sex is sex and this is definitely not sex or sexual. This is physiology something mom can explain to you and if need be decide if you need to see a dentist and a gynecologist.
So my advice is to talk to mom.
I practice self stimulation or masturbation but i have never ejaculated before.Can anyone teach me how to masturbate properly?
Masturbation is a somewhat personal thing. While better than 85% of us masturbate we all have our own way of doing so. In "Portnoy's Complaint," a classic American novel from 1969. Portnoy describes how he used a piece of liver his mother planned to cook for dinner to masturbate with, not recommended.
If you were to enter the following phrase into your search engine, "How to masturbate & ejaculate," a rather long list of answers to your question will be returned, some with videos of how too.
Mostly though masturbation is trial and error. You do what feels good and eventually you will ejaculate. It just may be you are to young and the hormones needed have not yet been developed. Just because you can get an erection does not mean you are fully ready to perform.
I am 21/f and I've really fucked up. About 2 years ago, I met this guy. We'll call him Fred. Fred is 26 and EXCEPTIONALLY handsome. Probably(definitely) the most handsome man I've ever met. So that was my initial attraction. We hung out a few times over the years but never hooked up or anything. Then at some point he stated that he was looking for a roommate so he and I moved in together about 7 months ago. Its been going great and I really like living with him. I've also gotten to know him a lot better. He's so sweet and kind and he's just unlike anyone I've ever met. We haven't had any issues except one thing; we began having sex about 2 months ago. We've spoken about it and we're both aware that we've broken a major rule about living with the opposite sex. We use protection but we're not exclusive or anything. Besides the little girl inside me wanting to share the sexy secret with all my friends, nobody knows.
And this wouldn't be an issue either but somethings happened that I completely saw coming; I think I'm in love with him. Its not just the sex or the fact that he's got looks like johnny depp on steroids, he shows that he cares about me in little ways and since we live alone together, its easy to notice the small things. I know he doesn't feel the way I do though, and why should he? He's ready to get all his shit in one pile and I feel sick thinking that I've trapped him in this position. It would be so easy to just stop sleeping with him but the sex is so good. Its fantastic and I've never had sex like this with anyone. We experiment and he's so open to new things and we talk and its just so new to me. I've only slept with one other man my entire life and I never enjoyed it. Not like this. I think about this whenever I'm awake. I dream about it when I'm asleep. I'm like obsessed and I don't want to be. I don't think its fair to Fred. We've talked a few times about it but I can just tell he doesn't care for me like I do him. I can deal with never becoming anything more for him, but I can't deal with the guilt that is accompanying me alongside with this INTENSE and CORRODING pleasure. And I can't deal with the thought that our entire friendship in general could get fucked up just because I'm a lovesick harlot. I hate myself for doing this but I'm already in so deep. I don't want to quit. I know I have to though. Its gonna be so difficult though :(( What should I do? Do I move out? Is there anything I can do to keep my emotions from getting in the way of his life? Is it possible for us to keep a sexual relationship going if we're still living together?
HELP
The best way to ruin a great friendship is to sleep with them which you have done. No matter what you do the genie is now out of the bottle and your feelings have changed. You say his feelings and your are not.
I don't see you two living together and not having sex. I think the temptation will be too great. IF his feelings are just those of a friend with benefits and he does not see the relationship going any further than that. Then the only solution is for your two to separate. Meaning one of you has to find a new place to live.
Don't be so hard on yourself over this. Remember it takes two to Tango. He willing allowed you to come into his bed or he came to yours. This makes him just as culpable for what has happened. You had a no sex policy and either one of you could have said no to whoever crawled into the others bed.
Since you are the one who developed feeling for him it is going to take you longer to get over what has happened. As to who is responsible for what has happened. My reading of this is it is a 50/50 split.
I am 24 year old female now I was molested by my dad when I was 3 years old and recently for the past week I have not been able to sleep because I have been having nightmares about what had happened when I was little and in my dream I was at my aunt's house and my daddy was arrested and then they put me in the police car and then put my daddy in another police car and then I every time I have this dream I wake up kicking screaming in a cold sweat and then when i am through kicking and screaming i am out of breath and can't breathe .Is this normal ? I talked to my cousin and my aunt about this and they asked me if my mom has ever mentioned it to me and I said yes I was just hoping she was lying is this normal for me to want my mom to be lying to me about something as terrible and tragic about something like this ? I feel bad because I want my mom to be lying and i am confused and scared . I just want the dreams to stop . my cousin says that everything is true she just wanted me to know that my mom is not lying so I wouldn't hold a grudge against her . my Aunt says he was arrested and at her house but she doesn't know how I know that when I wasn't at her house when he was arrested . How do I know that ? my mom didn't tell me that so how do I know ? my cousin and aunt are on my dad's side of the family if that helps. how do I get over this ? I never had these dreams before why now ? my cousin says if I have to to get over it to cut all ties like stop visiting my dad's grave at the cementary and get rid of alll pictures of him but my aunt says not to let this stop loving my daddy becuase my dad had alot of mental problems and he was just a sick man . my aunt says his daddy beat him with a handle of a butcher knife in the head and he was in the vietanam war got in a car accident and got shot up a light pole and got sprayed with agent orange and he was already mentally off before all this happened so should I let what he did go or do like what my cousin says be threw with him .
Is this normal? This is a yes and no answer. It is normal based on how this was most likely handled when it happened to you. Back then it was felt that someone your age would most likely forget about what happened if everyone just ignored it and never spoke of it.
I can't be sure what you were told though even at that young age you were able to wall this off and in a sense bury it in the recesses of your mind. The fact that you know that your dad was arrested at your Aunt's home is simple enough to answer. At some time you most likely heard another member of your family talk about it and you buried that information as well.
This was all normal for how parents acted at the time though it was wrong and it has hurt you in ways you are just now manifesting; which is also normal. Something has triggered the memory to come forward. The easiest time for these memories to come forward is in our sleep when the conscious mind is resting.
When someone is molested they suffer a trauma. We tend to associate things with different sights, sounds and smells. When you were molested by your dad something you saw, heard or smelled is associated with that trauma. Recently you saw, heard or smelled something that you associated with that trauma and it triggered the memory. This too is normal and since it has you now need to deal with it properly so you can move forward without reliving this each time this sound, sight or smell comes about.
What you need to do is to sit down with a clinical psychologist who is trained in this type of trauma. I would suggest you contact an organization called RAINN for help in locating a psychologist in your are trained in this type of need. RAINN stands for Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network.
By calling 1-800-656-HOPE you will be connected to a crisis center near you. A trained volunteer will answer your call. The call is totally confidential and the volunteer will talk with you as long as you need to speak with them. They will also assist you in finding the right professional to work with you to properly deal with what you now know has happened to you. This number is a 24/7 hotline you can call at any time.
Please call RAINN as they can help you and these nightmares will go away.
Hi there my cousin and i have been together for 6 yrs secretly we hve a 5 yr old daughter together and no one knows about it weve managed to keep it a secret this long but late last year she decided to end it recently saying she cant pretend anymore and alota people will get hurt if they found out i know shes my cousin but i just fell in love with her and even now im stil madly in love with her i havent seen or spoken to her in a month now and im heartbroken is it true u cant choose who u fall in love with? and i miss my daughter too and ive Also been told by people shes been seen with another guy this is just a very big mess at the moment i dont know what to do
Living in the states I am not familiar with the laws in New Zealand which is something you need to contact a lawyer about. I feel regardless of the fact that your daughter is a child conceived of incest; as the father you have certain parental rights as well as responsibilities in regard to your daughter.
Not knowing the law I can only guess at your rights and responsibilities though I would think they would be the same if Incest was not a factor. Your responsibilities include seeing to the proper care and raising of the child. Included in this would be child care payments, Health Insurance and life insurance to insure child care is available until your daughter is at least a legal adult in New Zealand.
Your rights include visitation, joint custody if you want it and sole custody if you wish to challenge your cousin for it.
Just what your responsibilities are to your daughter and the rights you may have as her father you need to see a lawyer. You also need to see if the fact that your daughter is a child of incest factors at all on your rights or the child's mothers rights.
Whatever is determined after speaking with a lawyer. If you want to maintain your rights you will need to have those rights ordered by the courts. Without a court order, ordering your rights to whatever you are by law entitled too. Your cousin is free to do as she please in the raising of your child.
I'm a 14 year old female and I've been looking for a weekend job but I'm struggling to find one.
My question is, what kind of things would you recommend I look at? I know that not many places can hire 14 year olds so if you could think of some suggestions of places or jobs I could look at, I would be so grateful.
I've looked at hair/beauty salons and catteries/kennels..but like i said, I'm not really sure what other jobs to look at.
The problem is state and federal labor laws which restrict employers to hiring those that are 16 and older. For those that are between the ages of 16 and 18 they must have working papers which in most states are issued by the high schools. These working papers tell the student and future employers what types of work a student can and cannot do as well as the hours they can work. Both you and your future employer must sign these papers and return them to your school before you can start working.
So unfortunately the types of work you can do now are those young people your age traditionally do. Which would include, babysitting, yard work, house cleaning, painting, dog walking and other neighborhood jobs.
I do like the idea of volunteer work to get work experience. Some volunteer work may not be available to you because of your age. Places to look at would be senior Citizen living Centers wear you could organize activities for the elderly, read to a shut in or be a companion to an elderly person. I don't know if hospitals still have these jobs but they use to call them candy stripers. These were young people who brought books around to the patients, read to patients and generally helped the nurse as they were allowed to.
For regular paying jobs you'll have to wait until you are 16.
I need some examples of sexting so i can text my bf
I do not recommend sexting. Remember everything you put out on the internet stays on the internet for all to see now and in the future. Some day in the future you are going to apply for a job. Future employers are going to search the web looking for information on you. Whatever you have written or texted can pop up including photos of yourself.
When it comes to photos a good rule of thumb to follow is; never send anyone a photo of yourself that you would not want your dad to see. Then there is also the legal side of sending nude or partially nude photos. Its called child pornography and even though they are your photo's you can be charged with making and distributing child pornography. The person receiving the photo's can be charged with possession and receiving and distribution if he share the photo(s) with anyone.
The FBI, State and local police departments are working diligently with internet providers to crack down on the use of the web in the distribution of child pornography. While your photo's may have a much different meaning to you and your boyfriend. IF you are underage they fit the definition and you both can get caught up in any sweep of your internet provider for these images and have charges filed against you.
I know what you're thinking, it won't happen to you it will happen to someone else. To that someone else who is thinking the same thing you are that someone else and these charges have been brought against other teenagers just like you and your boyfriend.
While I understand why you want to do what you want to do. I feel it is important to warn you of the dangers. Yes I know others are doing it. If you are the unlucky one to get caught I can tell you this; While people can understand the courts, and the law cannot.
So keep your texts to your boyfriend plain and just tell him you love him.
I'm a thirteen year old girl. This question is for people ages 21 and up, but I suppose 18 is ok too.
These days, schools are really drilling the message into us that we shouldn't drink beer or take drugs and everything else like that (I don't know if they did that when you were little). So what I'm concerned about is that right now I am SOOOO against alcohal. I won't TOUCH a can of beer or a bottle of wine. All of the adults on both sides of my family drink but I am totally against it. I'm afraid even though I despise alcohal now, that I'll just start drinking or be pressured into drinkimg when I'm older.
Were you this way when you were younger? If so did you start drinking, even just a little? Do you think I'll start when I'm legally old enough? Please help I'm soooo scared.
If the only way the school can think of to keep you from drinking alcohol is to scare you then they are wrong.
Young people between your age and 21 and sometimes even older have few inhibitions to begin with. Alcohol lowers ones inhibitions making them feel they are even more invincible.
In the movie "TOP GUN" Tom Cruise plays a fighter pilot. In one scene his commanding officer says to him; "Son your mind is writing checks your body can't cash." This is what alcohol does to young people who think it is cool to drink to excess and get wasted.
Many times these young people would be wasted and get behind the wheel of a car. Generally when they did so I would have to go to work for it was almost certain they would wreck and as a fire fighter I or others like me would have to try and rescue them.
I have to tell you it is no fun pulling broken bodies out of wrecked cars. It hurts us as much as it hurts your parents for as we work to save lives those of us my age think, by the grace of god this isn't my child.
This is what concerns us about alcohol and young people. It is a legal substance for those of us that are old enough to consume it. There is nothing to be afraid of as long as you realize it is a substance that should be used in moderation.
The fact that your parents and other family members drink should not upset you or scare you. They are adults and I will assume they drink responsibly. The key world here is responsible. As long as anyone who is old enough drinks in moderation then there is no reason to be scared of alcohol. It is wrong to scare you into behaving or not doing something.
What if I didn't want you to wear lipstick and told you it was poison and would slowly kill you. Would that be right of me to do so. Would it be right of the school to do so. You know it is not poison for you see all the adult women wearing lipstick so how could what I be saying be true.
Scaring you into not doing something is wrong, especially when eventually you will be old enough to do that something. Will you eventually change you mind and try alcohol? Probably just remember that getting wasted has it's consequences. It feels good for a bit, then you get sick to your stomach and in the morning you wish you had died, though that feeling eventually passes. So when you do try alcohol do so in moderation.
My wife used to enjoy orgasm with me during sex, but for about two months now, she just want me to penetrate her without fore play. Has she got another person to give her that treatment?
Lack of sex drive does not mean your wife is cheating on you. There are other reason for her not wanting foreplay before intercourse.
To give you any good reasons I would need to know more about your family life. Things like your ages, the ages of your children. Does your wife hold a job outside the home. What type of work is it. Reasons for these question is that stress is a large libido killer.
Without this type of information it is hard to even guess at a reason. Even with this information about all anyone could do is guess at a reason without being able to talk directly with her.
My best guess is that she may be under a lot of stress for whatever reason or something is physically wrong with her. Something that may or may not have actually manifested and she is reluctant to see a doctor.
My best advice is to encourage her to get a complete physical. She should speak to her doctor about her lack of sex drive as well as being screened for depression. If she is overly stressed; depression can be and usually is a byproduct of being overly stressed and easily correctable.
Hiii.... I'm 14 yrs old F... So let's start. In 2009 my dad died of cancer. It was very drimatic for me. It was so bad I had to go to a doktor. My mom dated ever since but it allways ended up badly* and you know how mothers are* So she took it out on us. Recently she started dating a guy. And ever since she did she is like pushing me away..* when she goes and visit him she just leaves us at my grandma. And when she is back she is allways screaming on me.* I tried to talk to her but it makes things worts...* there is nobody I could talk 2...* so if you have any advice I would apriciate it.* thX!!
You mom does care for you just in ways you do not see. I would suggest the best person to talk to and ask for help with this situation is grandma. Especially if grandma is you moms mother.
You may find this hard to believe but even as adults we do tend to listen to our parents when they talk to us. You will when you get to be moms age. It's called respect and something we all have for our parents. We may not always follow our parents advice. Though when our parents say they have something they wish to discuss with us there are very, very few of us who do not sit down and listen.
Mom is still grieving and doing so in a typically bad way. She misses your dad and companionship. Which is why she is dating as hard as you say she is. Talk to grandma as she may not see this, see only what mom is telling here and not aware of how this is hurting you and your siblings.
So my advice is talk to grandma and ask her for help.
I'm a thirteen-year-old girl, and I have an amazing mom. She does so much for me, and I want to show her how much I appreciate her. She's always there for me when I need to talk to her or if I need help with something. Recently, for instance, she let me try home school when I was so unhappy with regular school.
She does so much for me, and I want to do something for her, too -- something that will show her I really care about and appreciate her. Thank you!
There are a lot of different ways you can do something like this that mom would appreciate and not cost you a huge sum of money or any money.
One thing I think mom would definitely appreciate is a day off. Moms really never get a day off. They are always in mom mode. If you have younger siblings you might offer to watch the younger children on a Saturday so mom and dad can go out for the day and evening to just enjoy doing whatever it is they like doing together.
For your part you take care of the younger children and do whatever mom would normally do on a Saturday. I would assume this would including cooking for you and your siblings, possibly doing the laundry and cleaning the house.
The cost to you to do something like this is just time. TO mom though having a real day off is huge as moms rarely get a real day off.
Help around the house are what moms' appreciate the most. Sure a trip to a spa is nice. But a trip to the spa just puts off the inevitable of having to return home and do everything she needs to do just in less time than normal.
So whatever you decide to do for mom. Make sure to include doing what she would have been doing around the house while enjoying your gift to her.
How can i tell my bf i want to suck him off
Im female and 17 years
I would say to just tell him straight out. Most guys live to get a blow job. especially if you are not ready for intercourse with him or you are still a virgin and wish to remain one.
Why does my bf w*nk over me
He is 15 should he be doing this at this age
is it ok for him to do it over me iff im 14
Masturbation is normal. Should your boyfriend be masturbating over you depends on your meaning and how you feel about him doing so in a certain situation.
If you mean your boyfriend masturbates, alone at home, with you as his fantasy. This would be perfectly normal for a boy his age. This is something you can not have any control over. Masturbation is 80% fantasy and 20% dexterity.
Now if you mean your boyfriend masturbates in your presents, possibly with you partially or fully naked. This too would be normal as long as YOU ARE OKAY WITH HIM DOING SO. If this bothers you then it is wrong. What makes it wrong is you not being okay with it.
When it comes to sex, which you two are both too young to be having. There is nothing you can do with a partner that is inherently wrong or weird. Just as long as you are both consenting to doing whatever it is.
By law neither of you are old enough to consent to having sex and as I've said you're both too young to be having sex. If his jerking off, as it is called, over you does not bother you then it is not abnormal and should not be considered wrong.
Your parents may not agree with this though so be aware of where and when you let him do this. Also if you are naked when you do so and make sure he aims for the upper half of your body well away from your vagina. This is so none of his stuff, which contains semen, can possibly get into your vagina.
would any body care if i ended my life? my mom dont want me nether does my grandma. my dad lafted us when i was 3 now i am 17 about to be 18 and am getting married nexted yr.
To start with I care enough to answer you and tell you that ending your life is wrong and not just for all the religious reasons.
Your fiancé will most certainly care, be hurt by this and miss you. At the moment you will not believe this but your mom and grandma will be hurt and miss you too.
People who want to end their life are suffering an acute form of depression. When depressed we perceive things differently than if we were not depressed. An easy example of this is looking at a color like green. Most of us will see it as green. Because you are depressed your perception of things are off and you will not see green you will see lime or even a different color altogether.
If you can accept the fact that you are not perceiving things properly you have 2/3 of the problem licked. The first third of the problem you concurred is writing to us for help.
Now there are several ways of getting help"
1) The National Suicide Prevention Hotline is a 24/7 confidential number you can call staffed by professional volunteers who will talk with you and find you the help you need in your community. Their number is 1-800-273-TALK.
No matter what problems you are dealing with, they want to help you find a reason to keep living. By calling 1-800-273-TALK (8255) you’ll be connected to a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area, anytime 24/7.
2) Go to any hospital emergency room, Police Station, Fire Station and ask for help. Tell them you feel suicidal and they will give or get you the help you need.
3)If you feel that you are going to hurt yourself call 911 and tell the call taker how you feel and that you are planning to hurt yourself. Help will be sent to you and the call taker will stay on the phone with you until that help arrives.
There are two things I know for certain. There are people who will be hurt and will miss you if you kill yourself and the world is a better place with you in it.