about

My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.

The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.

advice

hw can i make my girlfriend know that i love her,each time i said I LOVE YOU to she cant reply she just look away from me

It would help to know your age in answering this question. The fact that you are asking it I will assume you are a teenager for the purpose of my answer. If I'm wrong write back with your age and a little more information about you and your girlfriend and I will try to help you.

First, understand you can't make anyone know, see or feel anything. You have to show them and that is especially true with love.

Second, with teenage girls they are warned that their definition of love and teenage boys definition of love are different. For a girl love means romance, holding hands, cuddling, having little things done for her such as opening doors for her. Boys on the other hand they are warned that love is more synonymous with lust; that teenage boys have nothing more than sex on their minds and are all hands.

IF you truly want to prove your love for this girl you need to prove to her you’re not like the boys in the second reason and do more of the things in the first with her.

By the way showering her with gifts is not the way to prove your love. Valentines Day is next Friday. A small toke of affection is appropriate and should be based on how long you have been dating. Meaning if you have been only dating for a few weeks you don't go out and by her a very expensive gift it is inappropriate. You get her a card and a small gift something $20 and under. I would say you could add $5 for every month over 2 months you have been dating if you want up to no more than $40.

If you have just started to date the traditional gift is a card and a box of Chocolates.

The most important thing is to show her not make her or force her.

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Hey guy's got a serious question here. I have been with my girlfriend for about 2 and a half years we are expecting a baby girl in march. I am not ready for this type of commitment and would like to not piss away my twenties. Should I stick it out with her or break it off? it gets hard turning down girls and not being able to do the things I want. I will be there for the baby if we do break up though. What do you guys think?

You had your fun making that baby now its time to man up and take responsibility. Financial support is only part of being a parent and like it or not you are the father of that child.

as for not being ready? You're never ready for the responsibilities that come with parenthood. But when the nurse puts that baby in your arms and she opens her eyes and looks up at you for the first time. All those problems you worried about all through the pregnancy seem to melt away. They don't go away they just don't seem to be as big for that little person you made needs you. You feel it from her to you through your arms.

You know you want to be there for all the first in her life. You want to be there to stare down the first boy who asks her out and you want to be there to walk her down the aisle when she marries. All these thoughts flash through your mind the instant your daughter is placed in your arms.

There is nothing out there more important than this baby. Yes there are more women out there to sleep with.; more wild parties to be had. But nothing more important than raising that child to adulthood.

I know, I've been there. I watched my son grow into a man. He is a Paramedic/Firefighter and in his career has saved many lives. I sometimes wonder if I had not been around to guide him what would have become of him. Would the people whose lives he saved still be alive today.

Yes I am a proud father but not just because of what my son has become but what others have told me he has become. I've been told many times he is one of the best Paramedics in the state. So much so he has been recruited to teach a paramedic course at the local community college he attended.

If you walk away from your daughter what will she become?

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here goes.
I am in my 20s, had relationships with guys and very much enjoyed them and plan to keep enjoying.

One niggling thing has got me very confused. One particular girl has me questioning my sexuality.
We met working together and thought her to be a kind, open person from the beginning. I admired her passion.

I noticed the way I acted around her. At first I believed it to be admiration of her work ethic and the effort she would pour in her work.

Started to overly look forward to going to work if i knew she would be there. Did my best to make her laugh if I thought her stressed, would always be aware where in the room she was, like 'pulling focus' on her, everything else faded in the background.
So i thought - i have a girl crush on her. I have known many straight girl friends have similar crushes with others so tried not to think about it too much.

We're now pretty good friends.
It is driving me slightly crazy. I have known her now for over 4 years been through a lot together and those feelings have not changed one bit. If anything as the friendship continues its making me love more about her. My heart breaks when she is upset. When shes angry, angry at me, bossy, patronizing, nothing changes.
Everyday things remind me of her, a certain time, place, discussion we talked about. I dream about her.
I repeatedly get those oh so cheese butterflies in the stomach when we meet. it is ridiculous!!
I don't get like this very often, a few times, all with men.

She is probably the most straight girl I know and have been on many a nights out with her, where we both, met and hooked up with guys.

Have to control the level of happiness I feel when i am around her in case i give anything away. And i do have to check myself because I don't want to jeopardize this friendship.

To make things more complicated: in the many years we chatted about anything and everything including crushes/unrequited loves. I have not been able to help myself in explaining how i felt about a 'certain' person to her.
This is a big part of the dilemma, the one person I would tell I cant because its about her!!! Such a cliche i know!!
I have come close to saying everything, she is bright, with enough hints she would get it. She has said on numerous occasions since that I could say anything to her and she would still be my friend. Even gave me a choice of answers, for me to not have to explain myself and just be done with it: a)getting serious with a guy [was involved with at the time] b) I'm Pregnant c) I'm Gay d)other

I know that if i turned around and said i was gay she would not care. Many of her best friends are gay and so has no problem with it at all.
Again the issue is more complicated then that. I don't think i am Gay, I like men too much!
My biggest fear is If i told her i might be bi and the reason is because of how i feel about her. She will awkwardly stay friends with me, drift apart till there is no friendship anymore.
I value this friendship too much.

My age tells me I cant reason it out as a 'hormonal/puberty curiousness'

from vary recently, we no longer work together, i thought that might alleviate things. Not seeing her for longer then a week, Stop the build up of affection I have for her. Doesn't work. After a month or so yes. As i rationalize how stupid my putting her on a pedestal is. Same way as people filter memories making them better then they really where.
So I think yeah no problem, reality will bring everything down, she cant have that much of an effect on someone. Turns out the first glimpse of her is enough to knock that logic over.

The issue broadens when I worry she thinks my unrequited love is a guy we both work with. She has told me many times she fancies him and for me to not give the name of my crush away and somewhat avoiding meeting her up for drinks if we are both free (though it kills me) could give her the impression I'm trying to hide my liking him and distancing her and as a result make our friendship less strong. which is the last thing i want. Ahhh!!

I dont know what to do with it all!! Keeps buzzing around my brain, many sleepless night.
Any advise welcomed

This is a strange question for me to try to answer. Strange in the fact that it is the first of its type that I’ve seen and I have been answering questions on this site for many years. I am trying to think how I would feel if my best friend suddenly told he felt as you do towards your friend.

First of all I don’t think you are anywhere close to being gay and being bisexual is even a question since it is this one person you have these feelings for. Next is the fact your avoiding her letting her think the reason is something it is not. This by itself is going to ruin your relationship with her. So what do you have to lose by telling her the truth. To my mind you may have more to gain than to lose. Do you know her well enough to know if she has any bisexual interests of her own that she may not have shared with you? Telling her what you’re holding back with could be a nothing ventured nothing gained situation.

Ask her to meet you some place quiet where you can have a quiet conversation. I would start by saying something like; “Grace your right I have been holding something back from you and it is not what you think.” “You may hate me for what I’m going to tell you but in a way it is better that you hate me for the right reason than the wrong reason.” “You know I like guys and I never thought about doing anything with women, sexually.” (Here comes the big part) Then I met someone who almost from the beginning as we became closer as friends my feelings for the person just exploded.” “I really have no desire to seduce this person but also I am so excited when around her I have almost no self-control.” “Grace that person is you.” Of course you put what I have written into your own words.

Then just sit there and give her time to absorb what you just said. She may be shocked, she may even be relieved . Her relief could be two fold. One: She could have similar feelings for you and had no idea how to approach you either. Two: Relieved that it is now out in the open and you two can now talk about it. By coming out and telling her you have reduced that 800 pound lion down to a pussy cat and if she is the friend you wrote about then I think once she gets over the initial shock of what you told her. You can have a conversation about it. Just how that conversation will go I can’t say, though I get the feeling she is not going to go screaming out of where ever you are.

My suggestion is that at this point you have much more to gain than to lose so I believe you should have a quiet conversation with your friend and tell her what is coming between you.

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Hi everyone, id appreciate that if the person reading this would understand my points of views, my decisions and to try to understand how I think. Me and this guy really hit it off, we've been good friends for about 4 months and 2 of those months we started dating. We had intense chemistry, it was insane..we'd talk about how weird it is that we both feel so strongly about one another in such little time and how were shocked that we got close so easily. Now i know that some people believe that 2 months isnt a long time, and your right its not but this expirence taught me that no matter how little time you had with someone, sometimes 2 months can have more of an impact on both your lives than 2 years. What happened was that he was really affectinate and loving in the begining of our relationship, then he randomly stopped calling or being as sweet with me. I wont get into details because i dont feel its neccasary, he just randomly called me asking me to meet him cause he wanted to talk, so i said okay and went then he tells me he isnt happy, he feels like we arent sweet with eachther anymore Ofcourse i let him know that its his fault, and that im the one whos always trying to be cute and call and do and say sweet things but he never budges (which is completely true) so then i asked him this : I was like, "Do you love me, or do you just have some feelings for me, because i really do love you, a lot" then he was like "Look i have feelings for you for sure, but im not crazy about you, i think your more inlove with me than i am with you thats for sure" Honesty is the best policy, and i dont blame him for being honest, HOWEVER i am not the kind of girl that can be with someone that i love more or care for more, someone who believes he has the upper hand in the relationship ( and he has shown me that he thinks he does in many ways) so i ended it, i told him that i dont deserve that and that i should be loved in the same amount in return, why should i love someone any less? and why should he be with someone that he wants to feel more for? it makes no sense to me. Our break up wasnt terrible, we were both sad. But i made sure he knew that my dignity was above everything else and that no matter how much i love him, ill always love myself enough to walk away from anything that i feel isnt fair to me. He contacted me after a few days (4 to be exact) asking how i was, i said i was fine and he said he was great and the conversation just ended. You guys, i am so inlove with him i cant even explain, i dont know what to do or how to act anymore, i dont even know what hes thinking or have an idea about it, im really hurt and would love some guidance, please tell me what i should do? do you think him seeing how strong i am and independent will make him think twice ? Thank you all for reading this and please no harsh judgement :)

I understand how someone can meet and fall in love in such a short period of time. My wife and I will be married 43 years come July. We met fell in love and married in less than six months. Everyone that knew us said it will never work. Most of their marriages with the exception of 2 haven't and they dated for years. So yes it is possible to meet and fall hopelessly for someone in a short period of time.

Being strong and independent is not a bad quality especially when it is attached to someone who is also soft and loving when it is appropriate to be soft and loving. There are some Neanderthals out there still who find strong independent women a turn off. These men are a bad choice for any women as they want to control their wife's or girlfriends and tend to be abusive as well. I see or saw in what you wrote, "someone who believes he has the upper hand in the relationship," this person gives me every indication he could be a controller.

A controlling person, male or female, cannot have a good relationship with anyone who has a strong self-respect and is an independent person. The problem is that even in relationships opposites do attract and equals tend to push away. This is somewhat of your situation.

What he sees in you is someone who may be stronger than him and that may be something he cannot deal with. Not every male is like that, most are not. You do not need to change or weaken yourself to attract a mate. You would hate yourself for doing so and your relationship(s) will eventually fail.

As for this guy; I know you have fallen for him, that you have some chemistry together. In my opinion based strictly on what you have written. Let him go he is probably the wrong guy for you. Stay true to yourself and your principals and you will be a much happier person for it.


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What's the easiest way to change it?

"IP" stand for Internet Provider. This is the company that provides the service to you. The number is unique to them and you and was generated when you signed up for service with that provider.

Can that number be changed, I'm not sure you would need to speak with someone from your internet service company. You would probably have to have a pretty good reason to have this number changed as I'm sure it involves more than just generating a new number.

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I am a 24 year old female and my church is having throw back Sunday on February the 23rd and we have dress like we are from a different decade and they are having a contest to see who has the best costume and I asked my cousin if she would make me a poodle skirt so I could dress up like I was from the 50's but she said everybody would probably be wanting to wear poodle skirts and she said I needed to the think of something that was more unique. Does anybody have any ideas of what I can wear to Throw back Sunday ? It doesn't matter what decade. I also need some ideas of how to to style my hair and hair is ear length if that helps any . Thanks in advance everybody .

I'll add one more to the list that breeeeezy88 gave you. Hopefully no one will think of this. Go back one more century to the late 1890's.

Some of the high-style dress of the time were quite good looking. I'm sure you can find a costume shop that will have a gown you will like that you can rent for the day. You might try to find a dress pattern and ask your Aunt to make a dress though given the amount of time to do so you might be asking a lot of her.

This sight will show you some of the dress for sale, which new are quite expensive. I offer this site only for viewing purposes. http://www.forestcreekrenaissance.com/Victorian-Gowns-and-Dresses-s/112.htm

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20/f

I'm under 25 years old and I live in Texas.

There was snow today and the roads were icy. I was driving and I breaked far away before hitting an intersection but I lost control of my car. My car skid and hit the bumper of another car. There was more damaged done to my car than it did to theirs (only leaving a scratch). The fire department came and saw that there wasn't much of an accident to deal with since both of us were fine and left. The police came 10 minutes after the accident and issued me a "Fail to control speed-accident" ticket.

I am slightly confused. The police was not present during the accident to monitor my speed but yet; I was presented a ticket. I am going to court in two weeks and I was wondering if there was any possibility in dismissing my ticket?

The only way the ticket can be dismissed is by the Judge. You can go to court and plead not guilty and explain to the judge that you were attempting to stop. Had started to break far enough from the intersection when you hit an icy patch or black ice and lost control of your car. It is then up to the judge to decide what to do. You can ask for the charges to be dismissed at that time.

I'm not sure the police chose the proper charge to charge you with. "Fail to control speed-accident" does not sound proper. In the state I live in they have a charge of "loss of control-failing to avoid an accident or speed in excess of road conditions." The last one means you might not have been traveling over the posted speed limit but were traveling over a speed which would allow you to control your vehicle based on road conditions.

Based on what part of Texas you live in, the further south the better for what I'm going to suggest. This winters weather has been very strange. Portions of this country that have never seen snow saw snow for the first time.

When you plead not guilty and ask the judge to dismiss the ticket. You can also ask the judge if he or she cannot see their way to dismissing the ticket or finding you not guilty. Would they be agreeable to "Probation before judgment, (PBJ)."

Based on your driving record the judge may be agreeable to this. If a PBJ is granted you would be on probation for however long the judge orders, generally 6 months to a year. If no other moving violations are issued to you this one is dismissed and expunged from your driving record. Your insurance company is not notified and your rates do not or should not reflect the ticket.

Good luck in court. Dress in business casual and stay calm when talking to the judge. State your case clearly. Based on all the accidents this weather has caused across the country I am confident that Judges are not going to add insult to injury, so to speak, for minor traffic accidents.

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I am 18 year old girl, i have had sex several times and have been fingered several times (all with my current bf). We have ben together for awhile now, but every time we have sex or he fingers me i always bleed. i have been able to keep it a secret this far but tonight he found out.
my question is 1.) what do i do about the bleeding?
And 2.) how do i calm him down, he thinks he "broke" me..

Let me make sure I understand what you wrote. You have only had sex with this one boy. Meaning he took your virginity. So when you say he thinks he broke you he is not meaning taking your virginity, he thinks he has hurt you.

If the answer is yes then he has and has not truly hurt you. If in losing your virginity you also lost your Hymen then he could have broken your Hymen but not totally dislodged it. Meaning Your Hymen or a portion of it still remains inside your vagina. With each subsequent intercourse what is left behind is probably tearing you a bit causing the bleeding. This is not all that unusual.

Many girls lose their Hymens long before they lose their virginity. A Hymen can be ruptured playing sports, horseback riding, and using tampons. Her virginity can only be lost when a boys penis enters her vagina for the first time.

What to do about this. First assure your boyfriend he has not harmed you. He has as the saying goes deflowered you when he took your virginity that he also ruptured your Hymen. Explain to him you need to see your GYN to make sure that the entire Hymen has been dislodged. IF not this is what is causing the problem and the doctor will correct it.

It is also possible that in rupturing your Hymen the inside of your vagina was torn. Continued intercourse reopens the wound and you bleed. Just as you would with any cut that does not heal fully and is reopened. Her again this is not a big deal and the doctor will fix the problem.

At 18 you are an adult now fully entitled to a sex life, even if your parents do not approve. You also have full medical confidentiality that all adults have. Meaning you no longer need mom or dads permission to see a doctor, even if you are seeing one under their health insurance.

As an adult your parent are no longer entitled to know anything about you medical treatment or see your medical records. So you can see your GYN and have this problem fixed without their knowledge. The only thing is your parents will know you saw a particular doctor when the explanation of benefits arrives from the insurance company.

The doctor cannot tell them why you were there and you don't have to. So make an appointment with your GYN and have the problem fixed. Based on what you wrote I am 95% certain this is what the problem is. Tell your boyfriend he didn't break you.

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Hello.
I am a 27 year old mother to a 5 year old boy, a 3 year old girl and a 1 year old girl. My entire life I have always wanted a family. I can't remember a time when I wasn't excited to have babies of my own. I was the kid who babysat for free because I just enjoyed being around babies and kids so much.
I also enjoyed babysitting because it got me out of my house. I had a pretty rough childhood filled with a lot of emotional abuse. So any reason to get away and to have a moment of unconditional love with a sweet baby AND get paid was like, majorly awesome!
Growing up I always just assumed I'd be a great mother. I just knew that I would never treat my kids the way I was treated; I swore I would never forget how it felt to be an oppressed kid.
Fast forward to 1 and 1/2 failed relationships and 3 kids later, I have turned into this miserable wretch of a mother. I am horrible to my kids, more often than not I hate my significant other and I totally take it out on the kids. Every night I feel so much guilt and disgust with myself and I swear that I will Di better the next day... Then the next day comes and things haven't changed a bit.
I am so ready to give up, and even though I know everyone would probably be better off without me, I just can't bring myself to let them go. I know I love my babies, and I know that I am blessed to have three healthy, beautiful, smart and just over all wonderful kids, but I also know that my inability to get my emotions in check is just fucking them up. I want so badly for them to have a great childhood, and to grow up to be happy, successful and respectful adults... But I'm doing such a terrible job. I'm basically repeating a shitty cycle and I feel powerless to stop it.
Everything I read about emotional abuse is geared towards how to help a child deal with an emotijnally abusive parent.
Well I am an emotionally abusive parents trying to find a way to deal with myslef. I have no insurance, no money, the state keeps giving me the run around every time I try to apply for Medicaid, which is the only way I will be able to get the professional help I so obviously need.
I'm looking for some advice on how to deal with my situation. Maybe some advice on how to get a freaking grip. I feel like I am going crazy.

It is said, though I'm not sure how true it is, that girls marry men like their fathers and boys marry women like their mothers. If the saying is true then the relationship problems you are having are somewhat inevitable though fixable with the right help.

It is also said that adults abused as children are or become abusive parents. This has been found to be somewhat factual. Yes this too can be overcome with the right kind of help.

The good news in all of this is you realize you need help. The bad news is the help has not been forthcoming. If you have not tried for Medicaid benefits since the first of the year you need to try again.

While I am not a supporter of the entire Obama Care Program it does have some benefits. Everyone is supposed to have Health Insurance by March of this year. For those who cannot afford it even with government assistance there is Medicaid funded by the federal government and available through state government.

What I suggest is you go on your state insurance exchange or the federal exchange if your state does not have an insurance exchange. Find the phone number for assistance with finding a program and call them.

I have very recently found that when dealing with government agencies applications are rejected for the most ridiculous of reasons. For things the reviewers could correct themselves which really amount to "T’s” not being crossed and I's not being dotted. Instead they reject the entire application and your back at square one.

With the problems of the exchanges they have hired thousands of people to take applications over the phone and help people apply for the program that best fits their needs and ability to pay for. When the application taker sees you need to apply for Medicaid they should start the proper paperwork for you. Medicaid if no other program is a fit for you is the default program. As far as I know you cannot be turned down if no other program is available to you.

You can also contact you Congressman or State Senators Office for help. Both of their offices have aids dedicated to assist with this problem.

Once your insurance problems are taken care of you know what to do. Find a psychologist you are comfortable with as you need to let everything out about your childhood and your romances. With the help of the psychologist you will break the cycle of bad significant others and learn how not to take things out on your children.

Working with government agencies to get them to do what they are tasked to do can be frustrating at times. Keep trying and if necessary call upon your elected officials. We did and for what we were in need of help was quickly resolved with their help.

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(Female, 22 years old, Argentina) I lost my virginity a month ago with my former friend of three years, whom I've been dating for two months... I really like him, he's sweet, he takes such good care of me, he's cute, smart, (hot!), and I enjoy spending time with him a lot... so why is it so difficult for me to enjoy being intimate with him? could it be because I recently started this and it will get better? I don't get turned on by him, I get to orgasm because he masturbates me, but I'm always nervous when it happens...
Has anyone gone through something like this?

You do not need to be aroused before you get into bed. Arousal is what foreplayis for. Thinking he is hot is the first part of arousal then he needs to be a considerate lover and make sure you are ready for intercouse,

It can be looked at as a 3 step process to full arousel. Step one: you find him attractive, he's hot. Step two: Foreplay, naked in bed exploring each other, getting each other excited, the start of intimacy it has to be your naked with some one. This is the time when you sow each other what you need to fully turn you on. Refer to my original notes. Step 3: Intercourse. This is the most intimate part of love making. The mating the joining as one. He is inside you. You have hold of him in a most loving manner a women can.. Together if everthing else is right you should enjoy a magical moment together. If you can't the problem may not be intimacy but deeper.


I believe the key to your concern is in your question. "I don't get turned on by him, I get to orgasm because he masturbates me," This tells me you are one of the smaller percentage of women who orgasm through clitoral rather than vaginal stimulation.

When women masturbate or are fingered by their partners there is more clitoral contact. Because of the clitoral contact you orgasm. This is not a big problem and can be overcome by using positions that allow for more clitoral contact during intercourse. You can find these positions by using a search engine and typing in something like "Sexual positions providing clitoral stimulation." Also during intercourse you or your partner can stimulate your clitoris as well.

Being clitoral rather than vaginal does not mean there is anything wrong with you. It just means your partner needs to be more centered during foreplay and possibly a bit more foreplay is needed to excite you.

Once you and your partner find sexual positions that are comfortable and enjoyable for both of you. You will have a more fulfilling sex life and have a hot time messing up the sheets together.


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I'm crying as I right this so everything is blurred. First my mom dad and sister fight a lot (16yrs fr mum and dac and2 yrs for sis) it's so frustrating, I have to pretend I'm happy with my friends but I no if I told dem they wouldn't understand ( you'll say talk to them see what they say but believe me I've seen the epway their parents look or talk to eachother, no serious fighting is going on) my mom has given up so much to stay with us so I can't talk to a facility and whenever we bring it up they blame it on each other. ITS JUST NOT FAIR, I spend most of my childhood crying and pretending to be happy but I hurt a lot. They can't get a divorce because then we can't do the thing see do and they both no that. I don't no sometimes I wanna scream at everybody and curl up in a ball. It just so hard watching them fight and my dad says I enjoy it cause he says I sit there and watch like its a movie. I'm only 12 and I feel as broken as some people who have been in a war. I want this to stop more than anything like sooooo bad my chest hurts and my throat is clogged and my hands shake. I don't want to leave so don't tell me to do that. They love me and I know that but how can I get than to love eachother. I wanna be a kid not a moping sobbing being. I ep want to have fun not to put on a pained smile and force a laugh. How can I do that???????

I'm so sorry that you have to watch your parents fight the way they do and to see your sister fight with them as well. I realize how disturbing this is for you.

Without knowing what your parents fight about it is hard to give you advice. I will tell you that some fighting is healthy. Fighting gets feelings out in the open rather than kept inside where they become stress. Stress is bad and if it gets bad enough it can cause very bad health problems. Just as some fighting is good, too much fighting is bad especially when it causes other problems such as how you feel.

You know that your parents love you. This is very good for that is important for you to know. You want them to stop fighting but do not know what you can do about it. It is not a child's place to intercede in a parents marriage. Whatever they are fighting about is something they have to work out for themselves. If you were older, of adult age, you might be able to offer some advice or at as a mediator. At your age there is nothing you alone can do.

That said have you given any thought to speaking with a trusted teacher about what is going on at home. Given how you feel and how their fighting effects you there are steps the school can take to help.

Are your grandparents still living, if so have you thought about talking with them? Funny thing about parents and children; No matter how old we get we still listen when our parents talk to us. We may not follow their advice or welcome their interceding into our life bit most of us as adults will respect our parents and at least listen to what they say. Your parents may not be, and form your writing it sounds as if, they are not aware of how their fighting affects you.

Of course if there are Aunts and Uncles you can always talk to them. My nieces use to come to me when they were growing up and ask me to talk to my sister when she would not listen to them. I didn't always take their side but when I did I usually could convince my sister to at least meet them halfway. In you circumstance any adult should be able to get through to your parents how their fighting is hurting you and is probably the cause behind your sisters fighting with them.

Sometime it takes someone removed from the situation to make those involved understand what is happening. I'm sure if you talk to a teacher, grandparent, Aunt or Uncle and they talk with your parents things will change.

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Girl 1)
Kinda short
Thick medium length brown hair
Green eyes
Tan Assyrian skin
Nice smile
Wears a lot of makeup
Big boobs - Small butt
Nice curve
Flexible but not fit
Outgoing/Kinda Lazy/Not much talents/Parties/Drinks/Smokes/ Dependent/Sleeps around a lot and gives guys whatever they want

Girl 2)
Regular height
Long brown hair
Brown eyes
Tan Latina skin
Nice smile
Doesn't need much makeup
Average boobs - Big butt
Average flexible but very fit
Sings/Dances/Guitar/Piano/Smart/Skates/Chill/Artist/Independent and strong/Has values

It really depends what you are looking for. Also you can never judge a book by its cover. Just based on the information you supplied.

If you're just looking for a girl to have a sexual fling. Then girl number 1 is probably the better choice.

If you're looking for a girl to have a long term relationship with, one that could lead to a life mate or a girl you could take home to meet mom. Then girl number two is the better choice.

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20/f

I'm feeling guilty. Last year, I marked myself as a dependent and my mom had to go through the trouble with her accountant on trying to do everything and to grab my paper work. Because I was a dependent, I didn't get any money from my school but my mom did. She didn't tell me that she got $1,000 and she kind of went off to another country to go to the doctor.

I got frustrated because that summer, I had to pay for college out of my own pocket because I wasn't offered summer financial aid. I told her that she should have told me so I could save the money to put into my college tuition because I didn't know how to pay $2,000 dollars for summer, I didn't get accepted for any loans, and I worked in retail. It was too much money to try to get in such a short amount of time. So, I had to borrow money from my sister's boyfriend.

I told my mom that next time, I was going to mark myself as independent so then I can save money for graduate school. And she threatened me, saying how she won't pay for anything anymore. How she won't help me at all if I needed it. She never really did help me pay for anything, so I agreed.

2013, I started working more. I was still going to school. I pulled out a few loans since I was going to graduate in December. I was pretty much paying for myself and taking care of myself. I was planning on taking a year off after I graduate to try to pay off the loans, save some money for graduate school, go to the doctor, and pretty much take care of things I needed to do so I would not have to worry about it.

2014, I filed my taxes right when I got my 1098-t form. Two days after I did, my mom came up to me and asked for my files because she said that her accountant said she would gain more money back if we filed it together. But I was already done. Even though after that conversation a year ago, and even though I do have that plan, I feel guilty of filing my taxes without her. Did I even do the right thing?

I hate to be the bearer of bad news but mom is entitled to take you as a dependent if she is responsible for over 50% of your support. This is how the tax law is written and how the IRS will interpret it.

I would suggest when you get your refund you put it in the bank and not spend an of it as all or part of it will be reclaimed by the IRS if mom files with you as a dependent. Which she may and can do. Just because you did not file jointly does not mean she cannot file with you as her dependent.

How I know this is when my son was your age and away at school he did his taxes taking himself as a dependent. Not knowing this I too took him as a dependent. The IRS computers caught it and sent him a correction and asked for a partial return of his refund.

I don't remember how much he made that summer though it was well below $5,000. Even without taking himself as a dependent he received most of what he paid in taxes back from the state and a good portion from the federal return.

Without him as a deduction on my return I would not have been allowed to take certain deductions. Without those deductions I would not have been able to finance what I was able to of his tuition and he would have had a much greater tuition debt upon graduation.

Yes you earned the money and under general circumstances you would be entitled to any refund. If mom is paying for any part of your college, books, tuition or room and board plus your general maintenance she is entitled to take you as a dependent under the IRS rules. If you were not in college then she would not be allowed.

Did you do the right thing. I would have to say no. You did what you did on purpose so that your mom could not get what you felt was yours. As long as mom is supplying 50% or more of your maintenance she is entitled to the dependent deduction as long as you are in school or until you reach the age out limit.

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I am recently 15, and I have felt emotionless on and off for 4 years. The longest I have not felt emotions was about a year and a half. Sometimes its short periods. Its not that I just think that I don't feel emotion, it's that I actually don't. I have felt emotion before, but it's almost as if its stopped. I want to feel something, I feel as if I'm a walking statue. Can someone help me find some answers on why this may be happening?

Feeling the way you do is one of the signs of depression. This does not mean that by itself means you suffer from depression. Feeling emotionless is just one of the signs a doctor would need to see when screening you for depression to make that diagnoses.

Now when it comes to teenage depression this is something relatively new as far as a diagnoses goes. In fact as recently as when your parents were your age and might have felt as you do doctors and parents called this a phase children went through and would grow out of. In most instances the child did.

Doctors now know this is not a phase that this is a reaction to a hormonal imbalance that affects moods mostly caused by puberty and the new stresses of teenage life/ Because of this new insight doctors are able to help kids who are suffering with this by balancing the hormones, mostly that they are not getting enough of. Usually a simple pill taken once a day usually for a year or so as your body adjusts to puberty.

You're too young to see a doctor without parental knowledge or permission. My advice is to talk with mom or mom and dad and ask to see the family doctor. You are old enough that you can see the doctor without a parent being in the exam room if you want.

When you are with the doctor ask to be screened for depression. It is a simple test where the doctor will ask you a series of questions. Be honest with your answers as this is the only way the doctor can make the diagnoses.

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I know this sounds odd, but I just want to know about this. I get to do lots of things in the dark, I feel comfortable being in the dark for some reason. My concern is, is it dangerous or perjudicial for my eyes? For my sight? Can I get short-sighted due to this? Thanks in advance!

You may be like me have better than average night vision. This can be both a blessing and a curse as I have found out. It is a blessing when you find yourself in dark spaces without a flashlight and for me when I was in the Air Force as a AC mechanic I always was assigned the jobs in small spaces with little light.

Will it make you short sighted to constantly do things in the dark. I really can't say as I have always been far sighted. I would suggest that you discuss this with an eye doctor. One thing you do need to discuss with the eye doctor is proper sun shades to protect your eyes when in the sun. The doctor may want you wearing prescription lenses to give you the proper degree of UV block.

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this is a reply to the comment you posted on my query. i gave him a blowjob and i ws worried about the sperms being left on his fingers. because he fingered me but he is very much sure that his hands were dry when he fingered me. and im 17! and i had only 1 period.. all this happened 1 month back. i by mistake posted it wrong.

I answered you yesterday. If you had a period after you had any type of sex then you should not be pregnant. Your period is the cleansing of your womb to make it ready for the next time you ovulate and produce an egg. That should not happen, for 80% of women until the middle 14 days of their cycle. Unless you are in the 20% of women who ovulate at any time during their cycle you most likely are not pregnant.

If you have missed a period, the most likely cause other than being pregnant is due to stress. Stress is the major cause of a woman missing her period.

The quickest way I know of to relieve this stress is to take a home pregnancy test. As I said yesterday I expect it will be negative and you can stop stressing over whether or not you are pregnant.

None of us are doctors and even if we are it is not possible to make a diagnoses of any type over the web as it is not possible to examine you or run any tests that may be needed.

If you are concerned that mom will see the test kit. Purchase the kit the night before you will use it. Put it in your purse and keep your purse in your room. In the morning when you shower take it the kit with you. Carefully open the kit take the test. When you have the results repackage the kit put it back in your purse and dispose of it at school or on the way to school.

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im scared that im pregnant.. i didnt have sex with my boyfriend i gave him a blowjob and thought i was pregnant but i got my periods..this happened two months back.. i got my periods last month also.. but now my breasts hurts..but its very very very minor. this has caused me to worry..am i pregnant? were those periods or implantation bleeding? my periods last for 7 days and the last two periods i got also lasted for seven days.. but im scared a lot.. please help

Okay lets get things straight first. You said, "i didnt have sex with my boyfriend i gave him a blowjob." You can give all the blowjobs you want and even swallow if you wish. There is no possible way to become pregnant from a blowjob. Your mouth throat and stomach as well as your digestive system do not connect to your reproductive system in any way. So there is no possible way to become pregnant from a plow job.

Sperm has to enter your vagina in order for you to possible become pregnant. This generally happens if a boys penis is in your vagina and emits sperm. It can also happen if you or he has sperm on your fingers and you or he fingers you. Other than that pregnancy does not happen.

You also had a period. Once you have a period, even after sex it is generally felt that pregnancy has not happened. You had two periods without having sex so pregnancy is not your problem.

What your feeling could be psychosomatic because you think you are pregnant; or pains caused by hormones being released as you go through puberty.

TO prove that I and the others are right is simple. You take a home pregnancy test. You really don't need to but it will put your mind at ease. The test will be negative and if the pains are psychosomatic they will go away once you convince yourself you are not pregnant. If the pains continue then they are probably caused by hormones and you should check with your doctor. He or she can make you more comfortable with medication.

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Hey guys can any of you suggest ways on how to die fast and as painless as possible...it's just something I want to know...tnx in advance

As a retired first responder I can tell you for certain. There is no way to die fast and painlessly. People who die in automobile accidents die quickly almost instantly in some circumstances. We are not sure it is that fast and without pain or awareness.

As far as way to commit suicide fast and without pain there are none. If you are considering suicide it is far better to consider living for there is a solution to all problems if you let someone help you. When a person gets to the point of giving up on themselves; what is really the problem is they are too close to the problem to see anyway out.

Coming to someone else, like us, not involved in the problem a solution or fix is generally found.
If you are at such a point write back to us and let us help. We don't always have all the answers but we most always know of someone or some organization that can help.

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So my boyfriend has already told me what he has bought me for Valentine's day...tickets to see my favourite band which probably cost quite abit of money.

I'm now very stuck as to what to buy him-should I stick to smaller gifts like other people do or d I buy a gift of equal value to mine?

Have you ever heard the saying about gifts; that it is the thought that counts.

If you put a lot of thought into the gift you purchased and that gifts represent you and how you feel. Then the cost of the gift is not important. He has purchased you what amounts to a memory or something of intrinsic value. Meaning once used it is gone but maybe not forgotten.

You on the other hand may have purchased him something he can use and look at and see you and how you feel about him every time he uses it. He bought you something he felt you would enjoy. You have purchased something for him to remember you by. They are as equal as they are different.

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Please help! I'm a teenager and my parents just got divorced. While they were still married, I found out that my dad had been cheating on my mom, and she knew this too. He had been calling 'the other woman' in secret and buying her lots of fancy things we can't afford, taking away from my childhood needs such as the books I wanted for my birthday but never got. (I also asked for these for Christmas but still didn't receive them). This other woman knew that my dad was married but went on cheating with him. I am so mad about this; as a parent, who can say that they did this? Imagine the hurt on the kid! How can I get revenge on the 'other woman'? Please help. BTW, my mom is really hurt by this. So, once again, revenge ideas, please? Thank you.

There is an old saying about revenge; "that it is a dish best served cold."

What this means is you don't go off trying to hurt someone purposely in order to seek revenge. If you were to do so you would most likely be the one getting hurt or in trouble. Your father has shown his true colors which has been at the expense of you and your mother.

If you really want to get even with your father you show him that you and your mom can get along very well without him. You do this by being supportive of your mom. Helping her through the hurt she is suffering and getting her back on her feet.

You are a teenager as such in the divorce decree there is probably language as to custody and visitation. Mom most like has custody and dad has visitation rights. I know you probably don't want to visit with him and his girlfriend right now and it is possible he and she may be counting on that, so they can live their lives without working around a visitation schedule.

By you keeping to the visitation you are messing with him the way he messed with you while he cheated on you and your mom. You need to behave properly while with him and his girlfriend and maybe his girlfriend does not want to be with him when he has you. That would be in your favor if she didn't for messing with him points.

By forcing him to live up to his visitation schedule you are in a sense getting your revenge. You doing so in a manner served up cold for you are doing nothing other than what has been ordered by the courts. He cannot blame you as he is the one that brought this on himself. If he abuses you in any manner, this could include mental abuse, you report this to the social worker that is assigned to you by the courts. Again his doing not yours. Revenge served up cold.

IF I am right, based on the little your wrote about your father. By supporting your mom and following the orders in the divorce decree. Your father will serve up his own revenge on himself. All you have to do is sit back and watch. This is the best revenge and you will be serving it up cold.

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