I have been dealing with drama with a former friend. She is harassing me, stalking me, threatening me with calling the police on me for stuff I didn't do or say to her. She is falsely accused me of things of things I didn't do or say. I have not had any contact with he since May. I have left her alone since May as she wanted nothing to do with me anymore. I have respected her wishes and made no contact on any sites, etc. She changed her email address and all because someone hacked into her account. Not me of course. Ignoring her isn't the answer as she and her friends are spying on me on sites and harassing me. There is one site that won't do anything about the bullying and harassment. I;m tired of it. I have been saving what is going on and I'm tired of being the victim of bullying and harassment. I have left this ex friend alone and she is falsely accusing me of contacting her through various sources which isn't true. I have left her alone. She also promised not to harass and bother me and mention me in her stuff and she lied. She is getting people to harass me and make fun of me. Especially my weight and she once posed as someone she isn't and harassed making up stuff that isn't true. She denied it at first, but confessed to the crime and has since stalked or is getting people to stalk and harass men on different sites. I'm tired of this. and ignoring her just adds fuel to the fire cuz she can do as she pleases. I have a friend who is friends with both me and this person and she is in the middle of this and she is in between this mess and doesn't want part of it. I'm tired of the harassment and stalking and bulling from this person. I am not sure what to do at this point. I have saved everything what this person is doing/saying about me along with her friends who have been stalking, spying and harassing me as well as bullying me. I want this to end. This person threatened with police action and I am innocent and not doing anything wrong and have left the woman alone. I don't get why she can't leave me alone and out of her life and her stuff and why she's harassing and stalking and spying on me. If she's not doing it, she is having someone else do it. I am not sure about filing a report on this person. What should I do?


You have not said how old you are, though by your writing I believe you are a young teenager.

Why this girl is doing this is because she can. It is a form of bullying and stalking. There is zero tolerance today for bullying by young people and stalking is illegal. If as you feel she has someone impersonating you. Should it come to it the police and the social websites can trace the messages to the IP the came form. She may not be aware of this but it is done when the police need to do so for many reasons.

What to do about this? If as I suspect you are a teenager the first thing you do is tell your parents. Stalking and bullying are a police matters. If you have done nothing wrong as you have said then any so called evidence she may have is worthless.

Have you ever heard the expression: "A good defence is a good Offence?". This is what I'm suggesting here. She keeps bulling you by threatening to go to the police and tell them you are stalking her. She knows it is not true and her evidence wont stand a forensic investigation.

By you going to the police, offencive attack, you are calling her out. Now she has to prove she is the wronged person, go on the defence, when she has been on the offense. She won't be able to prove anything. Now we will be the one humiliated. She will be the one who will have to speak to a juvenile court judge about her bullying. She will be the one who's parents are going to have to fork out money for lawyers. After having to do so I'm sure her parents will take appropriate action to correct her behavior.

This is also called turning the tables on her. So do it. Tell your parents, let them call the police. If she can't prove anything or her so called evidence, which she probably doesn't have, will not stand the test as evidence. Whatever she may have sent you as proof can easily be made up on her own computer, will not stand the test as evidence.


Okay well first off, we aren't dating yet. We dated for a while and broke up. We worked out our differences and are almost 100% sure we are getting back together, just not yet because we wanna be friends for a little while. But we still kiss. We both have never done more than that. He wants to have sex but I don't feel like I am ready for that because of a few reasons. First off we are both 15, I am almost 16. Second, I don't want to risk getting pregnant, I have my whole life left to live! Third, we aren't dating yet, I don't want to have sex with someone unless I love them and they feel the same. I REALLY like him but idk if I love him yet. I feel like sometimes I do but I am 15 I don't know what love feels like. I feel like if I did end up having a kid, I would be able to take care of it but I don't want one now. Most of my and his friends have had sex and he feels like we are both missing out on it. But anyways my question is, what should I do? I don't think I am ready and I told him that but I feel bad because he really wants to. But that's also my choice to make, not his. Help!

I found the website, shown at the end, while answering a very similar question for other young ladies. I believe you should review this website before making any decision about having sex, starting with “Am I ready?”

On the subject of are you ready: all I will say is sexual intercourse is a beautiful thing between two loving responsible adults. Sex for you as a woman is different than for the boy. You are more emotionally mature than a partner would at your same age by about 2 years. Sex for a woman most always have a loving relationship, meaning women usually do not hop in and out of bed. Where for a boy of the same age sex is more of a conquest, away to satisfy raging hormones.
My advice is to wait a few more years, let you and your body matures a bit more so that you can fully enjoy a sexual relationship. Don’t let pear pressure force you to do something you may not be fully ready for.



My situation is very complicated. I've been on the antidepressant Lamotrigine also known as Lamictal for over a month, and as soon as I went up to 100mg, I started to feel severely depressed and I can't shake off those feelings of total hopelessness and things are very bad with me. Unlike when I was on 50mg, I was doing pretty great. The only problem was that it wasn't helping completely, and I still found myself depressed, that's why I went up in the first place. I'm bipolar, and I'm also on Seroquel, if that matters. So my question is, can highering an antidepressant make you more depressed? Please don't guess on me, only answer if you know it for certain. I know I should ask this to my psychiatrist, but I don't trust her anymore, and meanwhile I haven't found a new one. Do you think I should go for a completely new antidepressant? Most of them have had the opposite effect and have made me suicidal. Don't you think it's worth it anyway? I mean, does anyone have an experience where an antidepressant has actually done its job right?

Both drugs you mentioned are used in the treatment of Bipolar disorder as well as an anti seizure drug which works well for depression.

I reviewed both drugs side effects and for both the makers say to watch out for what you are feeling, especially in the early stages of taking the drug. I also found that women are more prone to side effects with this drug then men. Especially women who may be on birth control. If you are on birth control then you doctor need to know this.

I understand not trusting your psychiatrist. What I'm not sure of if it is not trusting or just not comfortable with him or her. It really doesn't matter which for you need to be comfortable with your doctor as well as trusting in the doctors in order to work well with them.

The side effects you are having are serious and you need to do one of the following IMMEDIATLEY. Regardless of how you feel about your doctor you need to contact the doctor and let him/her know what is going on so the medication can be changed. If you are that uncomfortable with this doctor that you feel you cannot do this. Then go to the nearest emergency room NOW and talk with the staff psychiatrist there. If you cannot get their on your own call 911 it is that serious.


Ok soo I'm 14 and I don't care what people are going to think . I want to lose weight. All my friends are really small and I want to be the same way. I can never go to te beach or pool because I'm too fat soo do u have to be overage to buy diet pills or can I get them now ???

First of all I agree with everything flare said, so I won't reinvent the wheel retelling it.

Next you are 14 your still going through puberty. Your body is still changing and shedding its baby fat. You say; "All my friends are really small and I want to be the same way." Your friends may be the proper weight for their skeletal frame and height, so may you. I can't say for you have not provide that information.

Question: Did you know it is more harmful to be underweight by even 10 lbs then to be 10 lbs over weight?

You are 14 you can if you like go see your doctor with or with out parental permission. This is guaranteed to you under a law called HIPPA. It is a federal Law granted about 10 years ago so that young people could have confidential access to a doctor for questions and possible illnesses they would not want to talk to their parents about. All contact you have with your doctor from this age forward is confidential and mom cannot be in the exam room with you unless you invite her. Doctors need your written permission to tell anyone, including your parents, what you have been seen or treated for.

The reason I am giving you this information is; before you go on a diet and possible ruin you health. You need to find out if you need to loose weight. There is a difference between needing and wanting too. Your are not your friends. You are you a totally different person and the only person who can tell you if you need to lose weight and how much is your doctor. If you need to lose weight then your doctor will help you with a diet to follow and an exercise regiment that is right for you.

This is the only proper way to lose weight; under a doctors supervision. This way you don't lose to much weight or to fast and harm yourself, possible permanently.


i was in a 7 year relationship and got married last year.and throughout my relationship.i worked hard to get the things we have together .i worked 80 hr a week two jobs.and no days off.barely getting any sleep just to pay all the bills so she could go to collage.i helpt her get the new car she wanted,new furniture for the apartment,etc,etc,well after she graduated and got the job she wanted and everything else she said she wasnt happy anymore and told me it was over with us. i had to leave.and of course i had no place to go cause the apartment was my home.and i have no family to go to.so i was homeless.i had to go to a hotel witch is expencive.for now. till i figure out what im going to do.i was used this whole entier relationship.i dont have any extra money to get an attorney for a divorce since im not working 80 hr a week anymore.my wife switced my phone # to another phone she had cause the service was under her moms plan through verizon and now shes useing my old # for her personal use.and when people call my old #she is telling lies about me.contacting my job and anyone else she can .because i wont pay for her bills.i dont know what to do.its bad enough that she used me .but taking my phone # and lieng about me also .i just want to start over with my life but she wont let me.what am i suposed to do .im a decent good man that dont deserve this.

The first thing you need to do is find a good Lawyer. If you paid her way through College then you may be entitled to half of anything she earns by virtue of anything gained from her education. Especially any professional work such as Doctor, Lawyer or Nurse. This of course depends on the laws in the state you reside.

As to the the phone thing, her again it would be a lawyer that can best advice you. As to the bills or her bills. Here again you need to speak to a Lawyer. In general those bills that were jointly accumulated are the responsibility of both of you to pay. Once you separated you may be required to make a public notice to that effect before you can stop paying any additional bills she accumulates until you are divorced. At worst you may be required to pay half. If she now earns more than you it is very possible you could be entitled to alimony.

All of this depends on the laws in the state you live in. The only way to find this it is to contact a lawyer. If you don't know one call the State Bar Association and ask for a referral to some in your area.


hi.how are you?i am going through a really bad time.i am 22 years old and in a relationship with a girl from past 3 years we fight alot but from last 17 days she has started loving a friend of mine and she told me this herself.she even told this to that friend of mine but now he is ignoring her because he is in love with some one else.i love this girl alot and seriously cant live without her but she is all the time talking about that friend of mine and crying because of him.this thing is hurting me alot i feel like killing my self.pls help me out of this.

I'll tell you what my mother always told me on occasions like this. "There are more fish in the sea.

Frankly no girl is worth killing yourself over. If she can't see that you are worth having and that you love her and will cherish her for the rest of her life. Well that is her problem not yours. She is not worth your love let alone your life.

My advice tell her she has to choose, if she has not already done so, you or the other guy. If she chooses him then tell her to pack up and move on. Then have yourself a good pity party. Afterwhich rebait your hook and go fishing again. There is a girl out their that is worthy of you and you of her.

I found my girl that way and so will you. FYI; my girl and I celebrated 41 years of marriage last month. I don't know how she put up with me all this time but I love her more today then the day I met her.


MY great grandma has broken her hip 2-3 times. She fractured her neck and its well now, she has a sore on her foot that won't go away, the doctor said just leave a sock on it and let it get will but it isn't. She can't walk because her foot. She doesn't talk to anyone and she barely eats. we try to talk to her and she doesn't talk, sometimes we try to get her to eat and she doesn;t eat. She just lays down, not saying anything & sleeping or slouched staring into space. She doesn't want to get up and she's always cold even though it's literally 105 degrees outside and its not cold inside. She always has cover over hear head. She stays with my aunt for a half a week & my grandma for half a week. She didn't like for people to change her diaper, feed her or anything. She cried aboiut pain in her leg and the doctor said that there was nothing wrong, my aunt is a nurse and she didn't know there was something wrong.

Her doctor says that there is nothing wrong with her and she even has therapy for her foot problems. My great aunt is her primary caregiver, but my grandmother has my great grandmother most of the time. We took her to the hospital today without my great aunt knowing and we just found out that she has gangrene. She has been in so much pain for weeks that she really doesn't eat anything and she stays depressed.

I think that the doctors ddin't care for her right, because when we visited her in the hospital and the hospice, they acted like they ddin't want to change her or bathe her. And she was always dirty. When she was in the hospital and a hospice they never even told us she had gangrene, I guess they didn't know. I don't know how. How could her doctor not know what was wrong with her? All of the hospitals and foot therapists she been to and they didn't know?

I can't say if the doctors knew or if they didn't know. The only way to know for sure is to have someone review all the medical records to see what is recorded.

What I do know is that gangrene is hard to reverse if not caught in the early stages. The general fix, so to speak, for gangrene is amputation of the effect limb. This is a major operation.

I would be second guessing the doctors here; but assume they did know. We are talking about your Great Grandmother. How old is she? You talk about Hospice care. What is her general health? Is she in Hospice for some other terminal illness? I couldn't quite make that out from what you wrote as you spoke about hospice care and her care takers being your Grandmother and Aunt. Staying with them half a week each. I realize Hospice does home visits so this is why I question?

If your Great Grandmothers over all health is such that major surgery is more life threatening than the gangrene itself then the doctors may have chosen to go with comfort care; which is what hospice is. Here again the only way to get this answer is to question her doctors.

To do this you will need what is known as a HIPPA release. HIPPA is a Federal Law that guarantees medical privacy. Your Great Grandmother must give her doctors written permission to release any or all of her medical information. Without this written permission the doctors will only speak to you in general terms or whatever may be laid out in a living will.

Without this HIPPA release you really do not know what the doctors know and don't know as they are unable by law to discuss her medical condition without it or a medical power of attorney.

Unfortunately this is the law today. If you and your family want others in the family to be able to help care for each other. Then you all need to talk to your doctors about what information can be released, when it can be released and sign forms all doctors have in their office to cover them under this law.


If you were, would you consider ending it all to allow your long term partner to move on to a normal life. If your condition meant no sex was possible and you could not go out ever. Life was suddenly stopped in its tracks. What would you do?

Short answer: No. There is more to life and love then sex. There are also alternatives for relieving ones pent up sexual needs without resorting to cheating or prostitution, male or female.

Not knowing all the facts I would still believe your partner should have something to say about whether or not he or she wants out of this relationship. This is not a decision you need to make for he or she and it does not require such a drastic action. Even if you are totally dependent on him or her for your care. There are alternatives that can be made for your care should your partner want his or her freedom.

Suicidal thoughts are the result of deep depression. Depression in and of itself clouds common sense to the point that you do not see things clearly. I believe the National Suicide prevention hotline can be of help to you. It is a toll free number that is open 24/7. The volunteers will talk with you as long as you need to talk. They will then help you find the right professional in your area to work with you. Their number is 1-800-273-TALK (8255). Please call them.

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem that hurts everyone that loves you. I suffer from Chronic pain and I will for the rest of my life. My doctors tell me never to give up hope for a cure to my problem as new treatments are discovered all the time. While I do not know exactly what has happened to you, I will offer you the same advise. Never give up hope of the doctors finding a way to fix whatever is wrong with you. It happens all the time.


I been dating this guy for 5 months and im completly in love with him!! He has been by myside trough everything when j went to a mental.hospital he was there for.me when.i was sad and.crying.he would hold me and well hes my bff and even tough we have huge problems because hes 19 & im 15 my social worker told me that if.he comes at night and.sneaks into my room he would get a restraining.order against me and i know.my parents dont like him much because they believe it was his fault & blah blah blha well the point is that we been falling apart lately so he asked me to have an open relationship meaning that he can flirt and kiss other females.. when.he.told me that my heart broke in million of pieces and i started crying like hell it hurts a lot. His reasons for asking.for.an.open.realtionship was that we couldn't see each other that much Bcuz we live 30 minutes away and im never with him when.he needs me and that there was no point of staying faithfull if.i wasnt near him.. But now.Idk what.to do?!!!!! Should i stay with him and haven an open relationship? And.wait till i get a car and wait.till its only us again? Or be done with him? Or be in an open relationship and get revenge??!! Meaning by showing.him that i can be with as.many as guys as he.can be with girls.

Okay this is the part you don't want to hear. It is legal stuff though you need to hear it as it will make what you should do easier to do.

There is a four year difference in age between you, which you I'm sure are aware of. What you may not be aware of is the fact that because he is 19 and an adult his relationship with you is illegal. It is called statutory rape. Now it is rape regardless of the fact whether you two have had sex or not. The reason is you are, in most, states under the age of consent. Meaning under the law you can not agree to have sex. It is statutory rape because he is an adult and you are a minor. This is why the hospital threatened to get a restraining order against him.

I think it was nice of him to be there for you when you needed him and to help you recover. Now what I hear him saying, in what you wrote that he said is. He wants more from a relationship then you and he can have. In a very polite way he is saying to you it is time we met and dated other people. It is a very polite way of dumping someone, especially some one as young as you who may miss the delicacy of what he is saying.

My advise is to thank him for being there when you needed him. Tell him you are aware that staying together now is legally dangerous for him and that as much as you will miss him it is best you go your separate ways for know. You can add if you wish that; hopefully in 2 years when your 17 and legally able to be together you can reconnect and see if the old spark is still there.

This would be the adult thing to do, the right thing to do considering he stayed with you when you needed him. While yes in my mind he is trying to dump you he is doing so in the least possible harmful way. I realize it is still hurtful though their are other ways for him to have done so that are a lot more hurtful.

So be adult about this as all it would take is a phone call to the police by your parents or therapist if your still seeing one and he would be in a world of hurt. which would include a long time in jail just for being with you.


I wear my hair natural during summer and the school year. I have hair that touches my shoulder and most of the time I wear it with a headband or scrunchie. Nothing too fancy.

My hair is like this sometimes: http://www.blackgirlhaircare.com/wpcontent/uploads/2011/03/natural-hair-braid-out.jpg

or I wear it in a ponytail.

It seems like everybody else I know think that my hair is cute and say I'm unique. But I get insulted during the school year by people my age. They ask me why I don't perm my hair, the guys are rude too. Not all of the kids are like that, but most of them.
I'm thinking wtf did I do? I just walk away because it was not worth starting an argument with bumbling idiots.
I just think it's a damn shame that it is like this :\

You will pardon me for saying so but it is my feeling that some people are just plain stupid and bigoted. By the way bigotry works both ways in that if someone within a class of people does not subscribe to the norm for that class their own will turn on them as well.

You are you a unique individual. How you dress or chose to wear you hair is your choice. Don't let social norms or bigotry and stupidity sway you from being you.


im scared. i have to get 5 shots tommaorw! help! how can i calm down? also whats a physical? i also have to get one of them!

Lets start with the shots first. I don't think anyone likes getting shots. Now for me I'm nosey and I like to know what is coming so I watch everything and find it hurts less when I watch the doctor or the nurse give me a shot.

Most people prefer not to know what is going on so I suggest they just turn their head away and let the doctor or nurse do their thing. It might help to listen to music or read a book whichever you find most calming.

The shot itself really does not hurt all that much when given. It is afterwards when they give them into a muscle that becomes bothersome. If you get a shot into a muscle keep working or flexing the muscle afterwards to help the muscle recover from what is an injury to it.

As to a physical there is nothing to be concerned. You have probably had them in the past and never really knew it. Depending on your age and sex there are different types of physicals a doctor will do. None of them hurt, even if the doctor requires a blood sample.

In general they will get your height and weight. Take your blood pressure, pulse, temperature and check you CO levels. The CO level is a little item the place on your finger for a moment that measure how much oxygen is in your blood. They may also do and EKG which is nothing more than putting some things on your chest that then can attach leads from a machine that measures how well your heart is working. It is painless and takes longer to set up then it takes for the machine to do its job.

Then the doctor will come in and do moist of the normal things that have been done to you when you have visited when not feeling well. If you are female and have had your first period the doctor will most likely want to do a pelvic exam. Here again it is painless, maybe a little embarrassing, although it shouldn't be and needs to be done yearly from now on for early detection of things that could effect you reproduction system. IF your a male the doctor will want to check fro hernias.

That is really all there is to it. Nothing to be worried about or scared about. It doesn't hurt and for the most part different parts of the exam you have most likely experienced before. The whole thing shouldn't take more than a half hour or so.


16/m when i first started masturbating at 11 i would do it once every couple of days now i do it Bout 5-10 times day and my right arm gets really sore and achy and the muscle in my right arm are much bigger than my left. Any ideas on how i could cut down from this ?

As long as your masturbation is not interfering with other parts of your life. You are normal. When you start masturbating to the extent it comes before anything else, then you have a problem.

Right know you are experiencing hormone overload. Which is a normal response to the hormones produced during this time in puberty.


This is a response to your answer on my question. I'm the girl who's friend has valuable items of mine and won't give them back.

I want to reply to your answer, because frankly it pissed me off. What was the point of you responding? It did not help me at all and I like I said, the opinion of a stranger on my lifestyle is irrelevant. And the friend who has my items smokes weed as well, so no she isn't "trying to tell me something".

I obviously wrote in my answer that I didn't want criticism because I would just end up looking through all the responses and weeding (pun intended) out the ones I wasn't even going to bother reading because it told me to stop smoking.

Thanks but no thanks for your response.

I was able, thanks to flare, to read your original question as it was not one I chose to answer when it first appeared.

Since the items you seek to have returned cannot be reported stolen, for obvious reasons, then taking desperate measures to get them back may be in order. To do so though should not be done in away that would put her or you in a position of having her parents in the position of becoming knowledgeable of either of you smoking weed. Your thoughts of just showing up on her door step and asking to retrieve your things, does lead to this happening.

What you might want to do is to pick a time when you know she is home and show up unexpectedly. You have a greater chance of getting your things back this way then if she is not home. If she is not home when you stop by just excuse yourself to her parents and try again another day or at another time.

Now as to today's message. We generally do not support illegal activities. Smoking weed for the moment is an illegal activity. At the moment I am on the fence as to whether or not weed should be legalized for any reason. I have never used drugs of any type that have not been prescribed by my doctor so I don't know the whys of why people do so.

As a firefighter first responder I have seen the far side of drug use all to often. Yes weed is a drug. Part of me feels that if legalized and decriminalized there might be less of it used as it will be removed from the criminal element pushing it. My biggest concern is that even if legalized there is still the possibility, even weed, can be abused.

Maybe you can enlighten me for I do have a hand in the drafting of legislation, in my state, for possible legalization for medical benefit.



I'm single and my roommates all have boyfriends. It makes me feel worse about myself being single! Especially when they all have them over and i'm just the 5th wheel!
I always try to leave the house when I know they will be over, but I can't always do that.
What should I do? How can I cope without seeming rude? I really love my roommates and their boyfriends, I just feel so out of place.

First you being Christian has nothing to do with what you have written about. You have your values and while those values may be faith based you have nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about. They are your values and you should be proud of them for they a good values.

As to feeling out of place; I would need more information before I could truly be able to advise you. If I take a guess at the problem. I would guess your roommates spend a lot of time in the living room being shall we say overly intimate in front of you. If this is so then I would say you are not out of place; they are being rude.

When You have roommates it is okay to party together in one room as a group. When the time comes that a couple wants to be more intimate they should excuse themselves and go someplace private so as not to disturb or possibly offend the others.

If this is what you are talking about, then you are not the fifth wheel. You are practicing your values which you have the right to do in your own home. If they wish to be more intimate with their boyfriends they should do so in the privacy of their own room.

If my assumptions as to what is happening in your home to cause you to feel like a fifth wheel I apologize. As I said there is really not enough information to go on and I have made my best guess as to what might be bothering you.

Your values are good ones be they Christian or otherwise. Hold on to them and don't allow your values to make you feel out of place. When you get right down to it; all we can ever be judged by are our values and honesty. As I've said, you have good values and they will do you well as you go through life.


Hey if I give my boyfriend head and he has an std would it only be in my mouth?

First off If you know he has an STD you should not have any type of sexual relations with him and this would include giving him a BJ.

To answer your question it would really depend on the type of STD, how you handle his penis and where you touch yourself afterwards. I think it is pretty safe to say that if the STD transferred to your mouth it WILL migrate to other parts of your body in other ways. So once again if you know he has an STD don't touch him.


I'm about to turn 17 and i've been dealing with an extreme case of depression and several eating disorders I was prescribe medication but my siblings see it as ridiculous and think I'm attention seeking and have currently stopped treatment do to persistence from my family but I'm terrified of how I've been feeling and think I'm eating worse but no one will listen. How do i get them to believe me before it gets to late!

At 17 by Federal Law you are old enough to seek medical attention on your own; with or without parental permission. Medication alone is not going to cure your depression or eating disorder and I believe you know this.

What I suggest you do is get back into treatment for your depression and eating disorder. Part of your treatment should be with a good psychologist who can help you with theses problems. Having suffered with depression myself I can attest to the fact that my psychologist was a major help in pulling me out of my depression. I believe therapy is also helpful with your eating disorder.

Once you find a therapist you are comfortable with you can ask the therapist for help in convincing your family that you do have a serious illness. The may not want to or wish to ignore your illness hoping it will go away. It is hard to ignore a degreed professional who is working in your best interest.

For your part do not give up on yourself regardless of what is happening at home. You are the one suffering. Your parents and siblings can ignore your illness or you bit they are not the ones suffering, you are. Get back into treatment. This is what you need to do for yourself.

Not knowing where you live I'm not sure if the URL that follows will be of much help, though give them a try. It is a support group locator. IF you can find a support group near you I would suggest you go to a meeting and if possible try and get one or both of your parents to go with you.



ok after having my baby boy in august i noticed a month later a white slick substance comming out my vagina an o never had sex since having him.. but now the white fluid has a lil oder an it comes own on my panties.. if i wear the underwear for to long now it would start to burn .. the rawness is not on my vagina but on the outside like inner thigh but the back near my butt.. idk what it means can you help me by telling me what is happening?

None of us are doctors so we cannot make a diagnoses.

What I can say is this does not sound normal and you need to see your OB?GYN and let him/her examine you.


Ok so I'm 110 lbs right now. I was 100 about 1 month ago but then I started doing more and more core and upper body workouts. I play soccer and preseason starts in 2 weeks and we'll be doing A LOT of running. I'm so meticulous about my weight. I want to be back down to 100-104 lbs. How can I stayed toned with muscle but lose like 6 lbs? Should I do cardio then core workouts or vice versa? Your help is greatly appreciated!!

I wouldn't worry about the extra weight you have put on. It is muscle weight form the exercise you have been doing. Muscle weighs more than fat so as you toned up you gained a few pounds.

You may want to modify you workouts some to stay at your current weight and maintain your present shape and body tone, TO do this if you are exercising 4 times a week go down to 3 times a week. If you gym has a professional trainer you might ask him/her how the best way is to maintain without losing what you have gained, not in weight but in toning.

I would not worry about the weight, as I said you just converted fat for muscle.


Im 20.. 4 years ago i lost my best friend to suicide. I know my dad has been cheating on my mom. for years. Ive kept it to myself. we barely have a relationship me and my dad. i lost another friend 2 years ago, another one last year, and 2 this year. Im in college, i work a lot. I am just beyond stressed. I am trying hard to cope and keep it all together. No one, not my boyfriend, or my best friends, understand how i feel. I am so discouraged. i suffered severe depression for 2 years after my friend committed suicide. i still have depression for sure but i am not suicidal at all. My life is full of anxiety. I can't make a decision to save my life. I do very well in school. Im forming a lot of anger hate and resentment for all that has happened to me and for all that has happened to my friends that lost their lives and for those who are not understanding of how i feel. Im constantly trying to schedule something to look forward to so i keep happy. It's hard to stay truly happy. I am always getting yelled at for being so negative. I've tried hard to change how negative i sound because i know people don't like to be around debby downers.

Basically, I'm at a loss of where i should go at this point. I went to counseling every single year for a period of 2-3 months then leave and not wanna go back because it reminds me of bad stuff and prefer to work it out on my own. I was put on medication for depression but it made my anxiety attacks worse. What else can I do?

Having suffered from severe depression myself I can relate to how you are feeling. I don't think you have ever fully recovered and may be why you are felling the way you feeling now.

I can also relate to how you feel about therapy as well. For therapy to work best you and the therapist really have to work well together and you must be really comfortable with your therapist. 2 to 3 months of therapy for severe depression is not enough time, in my mind, to truly get at the root cause of your depression.

In my case my depression was triggered by an auto accident that left me disabled. That and dealing with everything that goes with dealing with this type of accident, especially being the victim I fell into a deep depression. I went through several therapists until I found my current therapist. I have been with her for a number of years. I have to remain with her as part of my treatment program for the chronic pain caused by the accident.

My depression, as yours may very well be, was caused by several triggers. Pain was the over riding problem but their were others I had to uncover and learn to deal with before the fog of epression began to lift. I have to deal with my pain every day and this is where my therapist is the most helpful. I see her twice a month and if something happens that causes me to loose control of my pain she is always available by phone.

Depression is a horrible problem but one that can be controlled and concurred if you work at it. You need to find a new therapist. Interview them as if you were interviewing someone to work with you for that is what you are doing. Find someone you are comfortable with telling your deepest darkest secrets to. For whatever is said in therapy stays there, you know that.

Also find a psychiatrist to prescribe medication. Why a psychiatrist? Because most depression is caused by the loss of chemicals secreted in the brain. While an MD can prescribe for you a psychiatrist who is Board Certified is better trained to prescribe for this condition. Proper medicatiopn should avoid the problem you've had in the past with medication.

Hang in there I can attest to the fact that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It's hard work but with the right help you will get there.


I am turning 18 in 2 days and i want to sleep over at my boyfriends house. I don't know how to tell my parents about this they are extremely strict. All we are going to do is watch a series on tv all night. What do i tell my parents?

The first two adviser pretty much said it all. You are 18 , legally an adult and no longer the responsibility of your parents. Which also means you have all the autonomy that any other adult might have. Then comes that little known rule that parents throw in when you reach this age. which goes like this, "As long as you live under our roof you live by our rules." Frankly their is no age limit on this rule.

If you're still dependant on your parents for things like college expenses, food, clothing and everything else. Then you pretty much have to live by their rules. Now that doesn't mean they should still be treating you like a 12 year old. You are legally an adult and they need to allow you certain privileges that go along with being that age. Just what those privileges are can be negotiated. I don't think you will win sleep over rights with your boyfriend so aim a bit lower.


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