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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!

advice

Hi guixe i'm fingering myself and i kinda feel that i'm pregnantbis it really possible

One can not tell by fingering their self if they were pregnant. Only a urine pregnancy test can do that.
I suspect this is the first time you've done this and you have felt something in exploring yourself and don't know what it is and since its inside of you, you assume it might be a baby.

Most likely, what you have felt if going in deep as far as you can go is a sort of lump that feels much like a rounded end of a nose. That would be your cervix, the entrance to your womb. The entry isn't big enough for tampon, finger or penis to get in, only sperm and the cervix only opens at birthing time so the baby can pass through and out.
Other than your clit (clitorus) which is a tiny bud on the outside of yourself, the only other thing you can feel inside in fingering yourself is your g-spot a patch of wrinkly like prune skin on the upper side (belly button side) of your vagina about 2 inches max in or as far as 2nd knuckle of finger. This area is right in front of your urethra, the tube that releases pee. The g-spot swells with blood when aroused and becomes very sensitive to touch and the right kind of touch can build excitement until climax, a more all body climax rather than the centralized one of the clit. Besides that, if you have the ability to use and squeeze your vaginal muscles, thats the only other thing inside you could feel when your finger is inside of you.

It might be helpful for you to search on line for female anatomy. Since the basics of sex organs, contraception and birth and sex isn't taught in most schools anymore, its up to people to teach themselves. Info is available on the web but you have to start searching. I will get you started with one link. If you want more, let me know and specifically what topic exactly sex wise.
This link is the best detailed visually and in explanation of a females sex organs and at 2.55 into the video is a realistic model of the entire female reproductive system.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WVL_GudwAOI&list=PLHROYgtRnnKAdSQWyUzdDDdkls81azAm2&index=4

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Hi, is he looking for my reaction to his behaviour or what, i do know for sure that he likes me and we flirt well more like teasing but he can be quite mean to me. we're friends. my question is when a guy says, 'she likes me' could that mean other way around just to see my reaction saying if i like him?

Guys view, please

Friends aren't mean to friends. Thats not what I'd call a friend. So then it remains to be known, exactly what it is that you consider him being mean to you. A lot may be miscommunication, inexperience in dating or due to being a young age. But to answer your question, yes, guys and girls will both use the same tactic of telling the person they really like that someone else likes them or they like someone else to see if there is a jealous reaction. This for some reason is the way most young teens try to determine if someone likes them, by a jealous reaction. Thats not the best way as some people are good at hiding their feelings and reactions and it can actually push thier crush further away from them than work towards getting together. And that is probably the opposite of what he wants. Why wouldn't he come right out and tell you how he feels about you? Because he is afraid...mostly of possible rejection, even though you are friends, cus this is a level beyond friends, feeling the attraction needed to date each other. A gal can be friends but not have those kinds of feelings for their male friend. So he may not ever make the move and just do other things that you find irritating. So if you have an interest in him, go to him and tell him you like him and would like to know if he'd like to go on a date. I think many guys don't end up dating the girl they want cus they hold back. It doesn't make the guy any less a good prospective for a boyfriend...heck I had to be the one to kiss my husband first before we got married. He wanted to be feared scaring me away. Guys can be scared about all sorts of things like that so if the girl takes the initiative and starts the ball rolling, its more likely that two mutually attracted people will end up dating.

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Me and my ex bf hav been hanging out for a year and 6 months now bt then recently he just stoppd speaking to me things arent the same like they use to be ths week iv been texting him almost everyday i even phoned him once but he dont reply to my text and he didnt pick up his phone..a few weeks ago when i saw him he told me he likes being around me he just dont like how clingy iv gotten im not clingy and i dnt mean to be im just worried about him cz its been a week and i havent heard from him,hs never been so quiet before..he is online sometimes bu he dont chat to me nli when its important..did i push him away cause iv been bombarding him with texts almst everyday asking whys he so quiet if his alive and ok bt he just dont respond...am i clingy thats why he dont reply..what do i do..iv decided to back off and just give him space and see if he will show up agan or not..do you think he will show and talk to me again..im really concerned bt i dont want to annoy him and seem clingy..did i push him away...sometimes he would just randomly text me out of the blue but now i dont know,i feel like something is wrong and here i am sendn him text msgs constantly..he told me a few weeks ago his not keen on people anymore and he dont like people needing him in his me time and hs not keen on clingy..i tld hm it felt like it was the last time im ever gna see him and he told me no he dont think so unles its what i want so i said no i dnt want our friendship and stuf to end so he said it wont happen hes just been full of shit lately..but know it feels like all i ever do is be annoying and clingy and overthinking things it feels like im pushing hm away and that il never hear from him again or even see him..what do i do please..iv decided to stop textn him and just bck off and giv him space..mayb or mayb not he will show up.do u thnk he will??

I think you already have figured out that its something you are doing that is pushing him away. If he's a really good guy, not a player or user, then even good guys have their limit of what they can take from their sweetheart. Not critisizing you hon, there really is no way for people to instintively know what works in a relationship, and what will hurt it. It must be learned. The learning is either by the 'school of hard knocks' or experience, as you've been going through, or the learning is from studying successful couples and reading books, watching videos on how tos, and do's and don't of relationships. Some of the very basics like how one communicates with another person are going to affect any and all kinds of relationships your whole life long: ie friends, family, co workers, etc. not just ones dating partner or mate. So it is critical for you to learn the basics ASAP if you want a smoother, happier life and more productive relationships.

While each person is different in how they need their chill time/alone time, it is a basic need in most people, some need more than others and in different ways. I can be in a room with my hunny but buried in a book and left alone to read and thats my down time.
You mentioned several things you do that are known problems when it comes to how you operate in life. I'll tell you right now that your mind is behind all of your problems. Overthinking and second guessing, jumping to conclusions, fortune telling, blowing things out of proportion and many other distorted thoughts are yanking on your emotions, getting them involving and your emotions cause you to then take actions that create discord between you and others and in your case, its obvious for you with your boyfriend. So constant barrage of texts and calls is a sure fire way for someone to back off and need some time to themselves or want to get away forever. Constant calling gives the impression that a person is needy or clingy. It is important for you to understand that males feel and interpret and understand and act differently than females do. If you are a male and gay, same thing, as you're acting the female part. I would suggest you start with reading books on relationships and also on ones that deal with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, CBT which concentrates on changing the distorted and self defeating thoughts that all humans battle at some time. Most catch themselves doing this and stop it as it happens. But some do it all the time and are so buried in it they cant imagine a life free of it. Start checking out self help books at your library or in bookstores. I know of a couple I really liked, When Anxieties Attack by David D. Burns on the CBT I mentioned, and a relationship book using again CBT, but written by a female, Linda Papadopoulos called What Men Say, What Women Hear. Both found at my library, might not be at yours but any bookstore can order it for you to pick up when it arrives. You save on shipping that way. Telling a person what not to do isn't enough, I know. So I really feel doing some studying will be a great help to you. Here are some things I got off a you tube video on men/women relationship problems.

1 A woman's insecurity and neediness will kill a man's love
Do you love me, do you love me? No matter what he says or does, she never believes him, even if he's never done anything to earn her distrust.
2 It's impossible to love others and be loved by others unless you love yourself first.
Don't look to a man for all your self esteem and self worth. Have it already before relationship..
3. Men do not show love the same way women do. For them it's how they feel when she is around and how she fulfills the dreams of the woman he's wants and how possessive he feels if another man was paying too much attention to her. Some women tranlate love into his obsession for her and devotion while men translate her love for him as being appreciated and respected.

In just that little bit right there is much truth for you. That part about women expecting that him obsesssively being in contact is proof of his love for her is true. Women do that. It just might be what you are doing, maybe not, There may be another reason why you need to hear from him constantly and fear when you hear nothing back. Some women have no life of their own...by choice I might add. They choose to pour all of themself into a relationship, a spouse, or their kids. Therefore once kids grow up and leave home or a spouse leaves/divorces, or dies, the female feel totally lost with no direction nor idea what to do with herself since what she designated as the
'source' of her life is now gone. It is important to be a whole person, without a mate, kids, or friends or family, Just yourself, an individual who is a whole person. A half person or one lacking a life of their own or having too many insecurities or weaknesses, will tend to lean too much on their partner, wearing them out and the relationship will be unbalanced and not the best it could be. It takes two whole persons to make the best relationship, not one and a half or two half people. Good luck dear.

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Me and my crush used to work together now we work for diff companies….I’m 31 female and my crush is 41 male well he flirts all the time with me, passes by my office daily, touches me in some form so I asked him was he single he said yes and smiled at me. I didn’t believe him, I said you are too cute to be single he smiled again…well I got some guts and asked him.to lunch and he said we’ll see well, that never happened…I found it odd since he picks on me daily and flirts and stares at me…so I did some research and found out he is engaged and has been for three years, which I don’t understand why he lied…. well ever since I asked him to lunch and that hasn’t happened I’ve noticed when he sees me with other men or people in general he gets jealous hearted and he just stares at me with this hurt sometimes angry look on his face. I’ve never told him I know he is engaged, because if I do he will know I was digging on his Facebook page, and I don’t want him to think of me as a stalker…I love talking to him etc…..but I really don’t know if I should say something at all or just leave this all alone and let him regret his actions….and me and him talk when we talk…my mom says that any man that isn’t married is single…so he can date whom he wants…..he isn’t obligated to anyone….I think too me it seems like since he can’t have me in the manner that he wants, it hurts him every time he sees me, or he knows I know he is engaged and may be wondering why I haven’t said anything to him… he doesn’t pass by my office anymore nor have we spoken since he has seen me talking to other men/and or getting rides from males that I know been about a week now. (he never asked me who they were either).they are family members btw.., he has slowly started coming back around….still flits etc, and stares at me. if I’m out during lunchtime he will wait for me so we can walk back to the office together etc….even some of our mutual work “friends” think we are dating but we aren’t. just the other day i seen him and he stood in my work doorway smirking at me, with a very divious look in his eyes...im starting to feel uneasy now... I don’t understand him, if there are no feelings for me in any shape or form, and he doesn’t like me like that, nor want me for a g/f then why is he acting this way?

Adviceman is right. I will say one thing though. In todays age, there are many people who aren't "in love" with the person they are dating, but for whatever reasons, love some things about them enough to think marriage might work and they get engaged and have these long long engagements without ever getting married. Or on the wedding day the one partner stands up the other and never shows up, or leaves the alter, getting 'cold feet' because although they really like and have some feelings for that person, somehow on a subconscious level the person realizes they aren't quite willing to be hitched to that person for the rest of their lives so they stall with long engagements that can be 3 years to 10 years as I've heard in some cases. To me, this kind of person may not really be committed to their betrothed, just going through with the motions. A person like this is also likely to snap at some future point and cheat whether dating, engaged or married cus they just don't feel totally fulfilled with their partner. At 41, he is no young thing and could be a bachlor all this time cus he's just never felt sure about any girl before or had many dating relationships that ended for whatever reason or he could have been married before. His way of seeking you out and paying all this attention to you to the point coworkers think you are a couple is soo wrong for this girl he's engaged to if he's at all serious and in love with her. If its about saving up for a grand reception wedding celebration but he's so in love, why not marry in front of a judge, (a daughter of mine did this) and later have the celebration. ( for her it was a year later) Other than money, there's nothing holding them back but not really being willing to marry for some reason. His fiancee would throw a fit if she surprised him by coming to the office and then catching him paying you the kind of attention he does. Its not a crime to be friendly with co workers but that would mean being friendly to all, not seeking out one or two. Are you this friendly with all the men in the office? Probably not. Are all the other men in the office, no matter of marital status, paying you the same kind of attention? I guarantee they are not. And thats what puts this into the right light, that this is a kind of stalking. It may not fall under 'sexual' harassment but it is harassment. You may like certain things about him and be hopeful to find a man for yourself. Frankly, at his age, I'd steer clear cus its more likely a big bag of trouble, him being the problem and not a matter of a young man with inexperience and just not knowing any better or being the player and cheater. SO follow what adviceman said, go to him first and give him a chance to change and leave you alone and I would also mention that you've had many coworkers asking if the two of you are a couple because what he's doing is SOOO obvious and not right if he's engaged. Steer clear of this guy. Just look for the friendliness and other traits in him you like in another guy, one who can be honest with you and won't flirt with his coworkers.

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So I asked a previous question about being nervous about a presentation for a specific class.
It's not just this class that makes me nervous. Anytime I have to present anything, even if its just to a small group, I get anxious. I had one class that was all people I knew well and got along with, and even there I got anxious when I had to present. When teachers ask me to give answers in class, I can feel my face go hot and my voice diminish to almost nothing. If the teacher asks me to speak louder, my voice kind of cracks and doesn't want to adjust in volume.
Is there anything I can do about this? My mom doesn't really seem to think its a big deal, and its not something I can really bring up with my dad, just due to the nature of our relationship. I have talked to a couple of my best friends about it, and they sympathize but have no advice for me. I am too shy/scared/almost ashamed? to talk to any of my teachers about this, because they all know me as a smart girl who almost always has the answers. I feel like to approach any of them with this issue would be letting them down. I don't know what to do...Is there any way to become less shy?

Ah, you sound like me when I was in school. I had severe shyness or what is properly called today, 'social anxiety'.
In my last year of HS I was finally so sick and tired of being this way that I was desperate to get over this. Your Mom may think it is something you'll grow out of because lots of teens are anxious about some stuff and suffer with low self esteem and that is true. But what you have mentioned is what I had and Yes....you can overcome it. Social anxiety has nothing to do with affecting how intelligent you are. There are grown ups who have gone their whole life carrying certain fears/phobias, anxieties. So its not something one can grow out of without taking certain steps to get over it.
I used to be so afraid of people just
looking at me, that i wouldn't get up to sharpen my pencil and would try to write with a blunt pencil. Thats bad. SO I know how you feel. I didn't learn how to overcome presentations in school but I had opportunities throughout life to practice not being so frozen and nervous.

I will explain what to do for presentations. There is much more tho for me to share on how to get over shyness in general, being able to approach to speak to others first...I had so great a fear of people that I couldnt do that once upon a time. So hon, if you want that also, write me back and I'll send you that in a second message. Write to me from my column, not the rating/comment site.

The biggest thing that holds you back in presentations is fear. For me, it was a fear of making a mistake, knowing my voice would crack or they could see me shaking, losing my train of thought, stuttering maybe, going beet red, kids teasing or laughing at me, and the best way to get rid of fear is to face it. You will feel uncomfortable as you face your fear and actually 'challenge it' by not waiting for the dreaded event to happen but inviting it to happen. Heres what I mean in example. In a presentation I would start off with admitting how scary it was for me. People can respect honesty and believe me, most classmates, even those who seem outgoing and self assured have all experience a time or two when they have felt embarassed or unsure themselves...most teens will be able to relate and any laughs of theirs are because they are laughing at themselves as they remember their own same experiences, maybe not as bad, but you get the picture. Fear is just a bully which if you face it, will back down and dissappear immediately, leaving you feeling calm enough to continue on. Yes, I know it is hard to take the first step so you have to want to get past this badly enough to do this cus you'll feel you're openiing yourself up for embarassment and ridicule but it doesnt happen because the majority of the battle is in your mind, your thoughts of what can go wrong and those thoughts pull at your emotions, mostly fear.
Heres an example of how to start a presentation: Hi there, I am sure you all know I am Amy and I am very shy and too quiet cus I get scared and too anxious easily. So first, I might get too quiet but i give you permission to let me know I need to speak louder by jabbing a thumbs up to let me know to be louder. Try it now, show me the thumbs up. Wow, I got some thumbs up and I haven't started my presentation yet. I kinda sometimes blush too when I am embarassed, don't worry, it wont affect the words I share. If I get so scared or nervous that I lose my place or my thoughts or want to just quit, you'll know its just because you are an awfully scary looking bunch.....just kidding."

When you can joke at yourself and invite them to participate in the very thing you fear them doing, its like magic, the fear disappears. Humor which this intro is peppered with will make them laugh and this is a good thing, you want to get used to hearing them laughing 'with you' not at you. When you've done this sort of exercise several times, or anytime you find yourself finding awkward, embarassed like talking with your new crush, you tell him at the start that you like him but you're so very nervous, fearing you might act too shy and it would turn him off. Admitting it again gives him the opportunity to build you up and say its okay, he likes you as you are, etc. I hope this helps you and that you're ready to start trying it. Start with practicing with close friends at home and go through the same steps. And write me if you want to hear more. Good luck dear.

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i wanna give my boyfriend an insanely good blowjob since its his birthday tomorrow. What position should I be in and live what should I do with my mouth? He is not curcumsized.

The most important thing in giving an insanely good blowjob is good communication. You won't be able to feel what he is feeling in sensations. You can feel him grow larger or jerk in your mouth but thats if what you are doing is just right. Using my husband for an example, there are a few things I do that he especially likes, and I know this because I ask for some of the basics. Then I warn him I am going to try something new and when I do it, stop and ask if he likes it, wants more, softer, suck harder, faster, more circling the tip or slit, use hand and mouth, hand on the base or grasping scrotum or even if he knows where his g spot is. Other than what you do with your mouth or tongue, there are a few things you can do to change the environment for him. What I mean is your sucking a strong breath mint right before blowjob and the sting of mint sometimes is felt by the man. Same goes for you sucking an icecube and bringing down the temp of your mouth and taking sips of an as hot as you can stand beverage so he feels the heat. Position for us is always a matter of how much stress it puts on ones neck. You want to be comfortable so try several positions. He can be seated and you kneeling in front, or laying in bed, you between his legs or kneeling and going from his side or even sitting on his torso, giving him a nice view of your rear while you work on him, or use a pillow for your head and both of you lay on your sides. In trying all the differeent ways you both will discover what works best for him to achieve the most pleasure this way. The same works in reverse if he were to give you oral sex or finger you, there needs to be communication, like if what you're doing at any given moment is bringing him closer to climax, you'll likely hear "Don't stop!" or 'keep doing that' and do just that, don't change a thing as it may interrupt the climb to orgasm and you'll have to start over. So keep the speed at that point and pressure just the same. He's not expecting you to know how to be an ace already at a blowjob. I know you may want to surprise him. The surprise will be your willingness and asking him to strip to receive his birthday present, a blow job. From that point, dont attempt to surprise him by pretending to be experienced. I am in my fifties and every time I've had a new partner, the learning process starts all over with getting to know what each partner likes. The basic mechanics of kissing, touching, oral sex and intercourse are the same moves but its how its done or delivered that work for one person and don't work for another from my experience. If you want it to be a memorable experience for him, don't guess at what to do, ask him and communicate. Non circumcised should make no difference in his enjoying the blowjob. Just ask him to show you what he does with the extra skin covering. He'll show you.

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My soon to be husband had desinger shoes made for our wedding, they are a size 5 and I usually wear a side 6.5. Please tell me a way I can exercise my feet to fit smaller size. My wedding day is July 2, 2016.

Your husband to be, should have asked your shoe size before spending the kind of money that having specially designed shoes takes. If he has that kind of money and wants you wearing that style shoe, then he will have to fork it out again. You need to tell him that size 5 is way too small. If you feel strange pointing this out to him or talking about you getting entirely a different pair of shoes, or you feel he may be angry, and thats why you want to find a way to fit into a size 5 (which is impossible) then I suggest you think long and hard about if this is really the right man to marry or whether you are even near ready to be married, let alone a relationship because it takes lots of thorough and good communication between two people to make any kind of relationship work, including marriage. If you can't bear telling him he ordered the wrong size, then you're in for troubles in post wedding life.

As stated, feet cant gain weight. Your basic bone structure and length/size of toes, and size of heel dictate what shoe will fit you. Depending on the style of the footwear, I wear anywhere from 6 to 6 1/2 or 7. I have a narrow heel and wide foot and that has never changed in my life no matter what weight I gain or lose. You may have seen women with bloated ankles from water retention and perhaps a little of the water retention making the top of the foot appear a bit puffy which happened after my hubby broke a leg, his foot didn't appear larger but the little bit of puffy ankle and on top went away once he healed. So in reality, if you have a problem with water retention/bloating that affects your feet, you could see your doctor and perhaps try water pills for bloating but that won't change your shoe size.

Since there's no way to know if even a 6.5 shoe will fit because of the style, its best he take you along to the designer and have the designer measure your foot and take into account heel and toe size and width of your foot before making another pair or you may find the 2nd one doesnt fit either. There are a few things in life I won't buy without trying on, shoes and bra's and pants. There are so many I try in what is my basic size but due to different styles, the size changes. You might fit a 6 or 7 size for this shoe. So get over the fear to bring it up and see if he wants to do this all over. You never know, the designer in wanting a happy pleased customer may give a discount on the 2nd pair since it wasn't really their fault the first time.

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In your opinion whats the youngest age you should be having sex

I feel exactly as adviceman does and would give the same ages, 16-18.
Most the time, it is when hormones start flowing that kids start to feel the urge for release and for some, hormones start at 9 or 10 but a good majority are at 12 to 14. This is a time to get familiar with yourself and sexuality by masturbating, or for girls using a vibrator if they dont feel too embarassed to ask the parents to purchase one for them.
Often the case tho is not wanting sex but wanting to spend time in the company of the opposite sex, someone who you want to be friends with and perhaps enjoy handholding and occasional kisses. If this is a concern in your situation, I told my 3 daughters that if they had any male school friends who wanted them to be his girlfriend or date her, that I wouldn't allow dating per se, but he was welcome to come over to our house when we were at home and her bedroom door must remain open. Not a single guy took up any daughter on that offer because they didn't really care about the daughters, only wanted sex.

Another reason it is good to wait to have sex is that with every year you grow older, your mind is still maturing and its more likely you'd make better decisions in later teens than when younger. However the average age the pre frontal cortex portion of brain responsible for good decision making is done growing is 25. So even at 16-18, many teens are not yet able to make good decisions. If you aren't able to be prepared with birth control AND condoms, basiclly, a person is not yet mature enough mentally to have sex. Being physically mature isn't good enough.

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Hey, I am born female but identify as genderfluid. But I'm sick of it, I'm sick of the constant fluctuation of my gender and I'm sick of always having to state my pronouns and explain what it means. I don't want to be genderfluid, I want to be a boy or a girl, I don't want to be a mixture of both! But I can't be transgender as I don't fully feel like a boy but I'm not cisgender as I defiantly don't always feel like a girl, it's so frustrating and I don't know what to do! If anyone has any advice to help me out that would be really appreciated, but I don't want any transphobic replies or rude or insulting things said, thank you.

I don't know if this will help you but I will share about me to see if this sounds like something that works for you.
Before i do, I come from a Christian background as the other advicegiver but have moved on to travel territory the church labels as wrong, evil or sin and used to believe without thinking for myself. Its thats attitude that kept me 30 yrs with an abusive husband 'waiting for God to heal my marriage' as the church taught but one Day God told me, that He gave everyone a free will and so he wont take control of and force my husband to treat me well cus that takes away his choice. I was told I had a choice to leave or stay. Now that I was thinking for myself with Gods explanation to not feel guilt, of course, I left the ex. What I'm saying is that church doctrine and what is interpreted from the Bible just doesnt always work as the church intends and in many cases does make sense as its not a spiritual issue but a physical or world issue beyond our control. I still believe that our world has become so toxic that many are born with physcial or mental differences that they did not choose and that to me includes how you were born feeling. So dont ever feel its your fault.
As to what to do about it? In my new path, I came to accept that there is reincarnation and have read books of those who under hynosis remember past lives and from many sources I've read that souls can tend to have a preferance for one sex but will take turns living lives as both. I know that although being female that I have lived as a male before. I catch myself standing like a man at one point but later I am moving and posing like a woman. As far as sex goes, it wasn't untilk with my 2nd husband, a very openminded, sexual guy who is comfortable in his own skin that we both experienced something that we both had never experienced before. I had to say something because at the time, I thought I imagined it. In energy form, it felt like I had a penis and was entering my husband. Once I mentioned it afterwards, he told me he had felt it too and like on a spiritual or energy level he'd felt a penis and that he was receiving and liked the feel of it. I don't know if that is possible for others, just whats happened with us. We are both secure in our selves and our sexuality, so for the most part, we enjoy and embrace the sex we were born with. But at times when our soul is remembering what its like to be the opposite sex and has a yearning for a taste of that, we allow ourselves to enjoy whatever traits might be opposite for our gender. That keeps a healthy balance as far as yin-yang energy. It would take an exceptional man/male who is okay with switching and able to feel the subtle differences in energies. Past lives are always going to be with us and influence us in some ways. Fighting it makes one very unhappy and unsettled in life. Accepting that you may have lived as a male before and being able to enjoy those times in private when you let your inner male out, is nothing wrong at all, very freeing instead. I used to have dreams where I was the male having sex or being a muscled warrier killing invaders to my village by bare hands to protect loved ones. The killing part bugged me and it wasnt until I came to embrace the fact I had lived as a male in a past life that I was freed of the dreams/nightmares. This may not help but I felt it worth to mention as you would live and dress in female or mannish clothes and go by female pronouns, embrace that you have a female body and are able to bring life into the world but have a partner who is okay with allowing you the time at home to embrace anything of the male side. Once you are okay with it, I feel one gender will subside, no longer battling with your feminine side to be in the forefront and be okay with getting the treat to come out on occasions where you decided when you when to feel your maleish side come out.

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How do I know when I'm having an orgasm or when I'm about to have one? When my boyfriend is eating me out, I have this super tingly feeling.

The tingly feeling is just the start. Its something being done that feels good enough to tingle but may not be the exact sensation or stimulation you need to get to an orgasm. Once you've had an orgasm, there's never a question again whether you;re having one. Women need a lot more prep time to get aroused enough for having an orgasm or for penetration than men need to be ready. No one told me what one felt like so when I had my first by masturbating, it scared me so bad thinking I was having a heart attack. LOL
An orgasm comes after your pleasure levels have increased to a point where its like waves on the shore, waves of pleasure rippling through your whole body. Some hold their breath at that point without thinking, some find it hard to breath, as if theyd been running a 10k race, an especially strong orgasm or two can make you feel relaxed, make you unable to move your body for a few minutes and your legs to feel like limp noodles but its not what everyone feels the first time or two. And also depending on your bodys mood you may need a different touch the next time to achieve same results. So just keep in mind to be vocal and communicate with a partner. Let him know when something feels good and you want more of that. If you don't like something, instead of making him feel bad by saying so, ask him to switch to something he was doing earlier or "I have an idea, could you try..." You may want the touch faster, slower, harder or softer, or even with split second breaks of the touching so you dont get desensitized, use lots of lube and reapply because depending on the brand, lubes can get sucked up by your skin and leave you dry again after a while. Hope this helps you dear.

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I have scar tissue in my ear lobe and it has moved to different places in my ear lobe is scar tissue able to move?

Scar tissue is what forms sometimes where there was a previous injury to the skin and surfaces below skin level. So a scar will remain on the site of an injury and not move around to different locations. The only reason for new sites of scars is that there have been more injuries.
What you may have is dry ears and feel some skin mixed with dried ear wax coming off if anything like that is happening. If you have pain in your ear inner or outer ear or trouble hearing, then you may want to see your doctor. Otherwise, its probably nothing.
Now some people can at times have a skin reaction, where they get scoriasis or some other skin condition, with rashes, scaly or raised bumps with or without itching and these can appear on different parts of the body and would then include ears although its not the most common place to occur. So it you feel its a skin condition that heals and then pops up again on another part of the ear, you may want to see your family Dr. who will recommend you to a dermatologist (skin specialist) to look at and possibly treat you if needed.

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I am gonna have sex for the first time ever, this week and I wanted to know what it feels like? What should I expect?

First of all, most people who are asked to remember their first time having sex do not have good things to say, no memorable things about it. It can be wonderful for some but that depends on who your partner is. That makes the biggest difference on whether it is bad or fairly good even if neither have much prior experience.
The best thing is to not have any expectations and let the rest of your life be a learning experience as far as sex is concerned. I am in my fifties and still, there are new things I find myself experiencing that I haven't before. One cant know it all before starting.
If sex is with a person where both have strong feelings for each other and they are similar in their pheremone make up, it can be great. Sometimes the excitement one feels is due to the newness, of doing something you havent before. So if after a few weeks or couple months you dont like sex with your partner, most likely you were running on new experience, or new relationship energy where the excitement fades pretty quickly. If its the real thing and both of you plan to do all you can to please each other, then both will hopefully experience orgasms. As to just clinically speaking what the stages are, there is the period of time to arouse each other, women take longer and need more interaction than men but that doesnt mean males dont like their errogenous zones stroked. Everywhere there is skin and nerve endings is a possible errogenous zone for you and your partner. It differs as to how much pleasure a person gets from that. Kissing is a good way to get aroused too. Taking ones time is important too. Generally, people feel more excited, their heartbeat picks up, you can feel like your heart or stomach is doing somersaults and you feel a throbbing in your sexual parts. The strength of the pleasure and excitement builds to a peak at which point there is the release/ejaculation. Women ejaculate too, although some only have their ejaculate travel into their bladder while others either dribble or spray out their cum. Women who may feel the sensation to pee, if they allow theirself to relax can have great orgasms. Other than that, theres nothing else one can tell you, it must be experienced. However I suggest you use condoms and if you want this to become a regular thing, have the female on birth control. If you have questions regarding getting on birth control and are young,, let me know.

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Dragonflymagic I wanted to thank you for responding to my brother if he would have read it I know he would of been the one to thank himself,he was a great man and even better little brother I hope this is not out of line me going into his phone but his question on this site explains alot ,thank you once again for being so kind to my brother

"taking my own life "
RIP

From how you've written back, I assume he did end his life. If so, I am sorry to hear of your loss. My opinion is that checking his phone, computer or anything else for information that helps you piece together why, if you can mentally put yourself in his shoes to understand why, can help bring understanding and some closure. Now is time for the grieving process which is different for everyone but there are certain steps to go through it all the way. I have lost 3 family members, not to suicide but theres an emptiness when they're gone that no one else can fill. I rely on my good memories to help feel their presence and know that someday I shall see them all on the other side.
Blessings to you dear. You didn't have to write and let me know but you are a very caring person for doing so. He had/has a wonderful sister.

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I am a 14 year old girl and my dad has always loved me a lot but just recently he started to kiss me on my neck and every once and a while on the lips, he also grabs me from behind and kisses me on the back of my neck.
I am not uncomfortable when he does it just makes me feel kind of weird I haven't told him about it and I'm not sure if I should or not I mean is this normal or no?

The key word here is 'recently' which means this isn't his normal way of showing love to you.

Theres a special bond between daughter and father. Girls once going thru puberty want to have verification that they are beautiful young women, no longer little girls. That can be a healthy experience of Dad simply saying as mine did, wow hon, you look so pretty. I better get a baseball bat ready to beat off all the guys who come after you. What your Dad is doing is Not a healthy version of recognizing your becoming a woman.
Kissing on the lips, neck, nape of neck and going on from there to kissing and touching other areas on the body are all part of foreplay, the prelude to having sex. While he may not intend to go that far, its guaranteed that since he just started doing this and you are 14, that he is recognizing you as a sexual creature now but in a bad way, wanting to experience for himself some excitement and such. This is not appropriate!

While you may love Dad, and have a close bond with him and not want to hurt that bond, this can't go on without saying that he needs to stop this. If he won't stop, you need to tell Mom. If Mom doesn't believe you, talk to a school counselor because you need someone who will make sure this stops before it goes much further. Dad won't be in big trouble at this point, but he may instead get some needed counseling if he struggles with this issue.

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Hey guys, I'm twenty one and my boyfriend of about six months is twenty three. My question is involving him ejaculating way too soon, as of late. I say as of late and my naming my question what I did because this hasn't been an issue the entire time we've been together. It happened for the first time about two weeks ago when we had sex for the first time in about three weeks (I told him I wanted to go on the pill before we did again, hence the three week wait); a few days after, I got my period so we didn't do anything for the next week. It happened for the second time last night, the day after I finished my period. He said he thinks it's because he's nervous about it happening now, so that's what he thinks about and then it happens.

I guess I'm just wondering what the issue could be since it hasn't been the entire time that we've been dating. I guess it could be because we haven't done much for a while since I wanted to get on the pill and then I got my period, maybe he got excited when we did do something again.

He gets embarrassed about it and he apologizes profusely when it happens and I'm not mad about it or get angry at him for it but if we can get over it and try to fix it so it doesn't happen again, that would be great so any advice or input is appreciated!

I would have to say that subconsciously there may have been some thoughts in his mind that led to this. If you had no birth control before and chances were greater of having a child and not ready to have one, then getting on birth control should have had the opposite effect to free both of you up sexually to be able to enjoy more. H
e wasn't hoping to start a family right away, was he? Its the only reason I can think of why he might have this physical reaction, or afraid that after birth control, when finally ready, that it would affect your ability to have kids, which is not true.

Luckily there are exercises that can be done to stop premature ejaculation. Here is a site on line.
http://www.everydayhealth.com/sexual-health/dr-laura-berman-tips-to-help-stop-premature-ejaculation.aspx

He'll have to do most the work but at one point you can help be part of one method. It will take time so no instant result but if you keep at it, eventually he will have great control over it. Sex is enhanced because women can often go on to have many orgasms if her man can delay when he lets himself go, and do so only when he feels you've had plenty of time to enjoy. He's lucky to have a wonderful understanding support gal like you.

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I'm 16 years old, genderqueer (closeted).

This is a long story. Sorry.

About a year ago, I became friends with S, the concertmaster of my youth orchestra, and until ten days ago, we were gradually becoming closer. It has been a long and traumatic year for our group of friends, and that has made me seek emotional refuge in friendship more than I might usually. The simplest way to explain this trauma is to say that in May, one of our closest mutual friends died by suicide. (This friend, to whom I'll refer as B, was my stand partner in our youth orchestra.) And so it's been confusing and chaotic and terrifying already.

I realized in April that I had a crush on S, and for a long time I was pretty sure he was attracted to me too. In September, the youth orchestra season started up again, and it was really difficult to go back, as it was the first time we all were together in rehearsals since B died. My main coping method was talking to friends, particularly S. We tried to forget everything; S and I flirted a lot and were generally frivolous teenagers.

As time has gone on, things haven't become easy, but it has become easier to talk about it. S and I started talking about more serious things, like grief and music and our insecurities. I kind of tried to ask him out on Oct. 17, but it was way too public of a setting and thus ended really awkwardly. The weekend of Oct. 25, our orchestra had a run-out concert in another city, and on the bus, we sat together and talked the entire time. Since then, he hasn't talked to me once. I think I've scared him away by being so clingy; I think I've become too open too fast. Even worse, I get kind of nervous when we talk, and so I end up talking way too much and dominating the conversation. I feel bad and don't want this to be the end.

I want to stay friends with S for so many reasons. For one, I really like and respect him as a person and as a friend. It would be hard for me if our friendship was ruined simply because it would be a big loss, considering how good of friends we have been. We’ve known each other for a long time; it’s just that we were never close before a year ago. By “a long time” I mean three years, which doesn’t sound that long, especially considering that I’m a kid. However, our orchestra is a very tight-knit community, and you get to know people well without ever seeing them outside of the orchestra. The music business is really, really small, and everyone knows everybody. (For instance, the professional musicians who are now our teachers all know each other because they were in this same youth orchestra in high school!) Thus, it would be immensely alienating for me to lose my relationship with him. Lastly, it would be hard for me to cope, especially in addition to the grief with which I am already coping. I don’t want to lose any more of my best friends.

I’m going to see S tomorrow, at rehearsal. It’s actually a rehearsal for the beginning orchestra — we both volunteer. Since I’m already helping out, he doesn’t technically need to be there, and has been coming of his own volition. I have a few thoughts as to what I should do from here on out:
1. I could ask him tomorrow if I’ve made him uncomfortable, and apologize.
2. I could give him some space and not talk to him until he approaches me.
3. I could give him some space for a while (another week or two), then try to resolve things between us.

What do you think I should do?

Thank you, and sorry this was so long.

I think you may be correct when you fear you came across as needy to your friend. 3 yrs is a good amt of time to know each other so unless you have changed much, then in your favor, your friend should know that these are some of the issues that come along with you. Being in your position, of anything variant in gender ID or sexual orientation is hard enough for adults to admit and even worse for teens. So don't be too hard on yourself as you truly do have a need to talk about issues related to that. Might I suggest your using a support group website set up for those with other gender ID's, because there you will find others like you with the same issues, and those who can explain how they handled situations, what the outcomes were, and what the best thing to do is, and what not to do. Just put in a search for LGBT teen support group and you should get plenty hits.

As to which of numbers 1,2,3 to go for, I vote for number 1, mainly because its a mistake to try to guess what the other will do. He could be waiting for you to approach him and say something while you wait for him to make the first move so neither does. Then as time goes on with neither talking first, both of you begin to wonder how hurt or pissed the other is and begin to think the worst possible thoughts of what might be happening. If both of you come to the conclusion in your minds that its over, then no one approaches the other and you both go on miserable without each other. Yes, some people need time to cool down if upset. If he wasn't visibly upset or yelling, then likely its okay to approach him and say something. Good luck.

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I've come to this because. The pain is greater then what's causing it ,I just WAnt some happiness not what she is doing. To me fuck it I got 12 hours before. I start the next chapter. Sorry. I just had to vent see u on the other side

When in the midst of a painful life, its hard to see a way out... I know cus I've been there, altho I wasn't thinking of suicide. It sounds like your issue is over how someone is treating you. And again, I know how awful that can be...for me verbal and at the end physical abuse and at the end, telling a counselor he'd never been in love with me (during 30 yrs together??)
That hurts !! But even that isn't worth ending ones life over.
If you feel suicidal right now, call 911 and they'll send someone out to help you.

Regarding happiness, everyone wants that. However in this world there are things we cant control. We can control our own behavior and decisions and thoughts but we cant control or change behavior of others. Hon, the important thing to keep in mind is that on this planet are souls of every level of maturity. Earth is like a school with grade levels. Some souls are old souls, like college grad level while there are others just too new, kindergarten level and everything in between. So we can't expect that every person we meet is going to be at the same level as ourselves

Then there are those who don't make it to the next grade. Among this we find those who are liars, cheaters, stealers, killers, etc and perhaps those who do okay 1/2 the time but screw up on the rest. In the case where someone is not treating you well and hurting you, perhaps there is something that can be done. I had to make the hard choice to leave the person causing me the most hurt and never thought my life could be as wonderful as it is now. If this is more a cry for help rather than an announcment of ending your life for sure, please write again and list your situation to see if just maybe there is another perspective, something you hadn't thought of to try that will help. Bless you.

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how do I talk to a boy or bus driver who keeps looking at me like every 4 minutes? I don't know what to do about this especially the bus driver

Lets separate the two first.

Any boy riding the bus whom you want to talk to cus you want to get to know him is going to be in your age range. Your generation is forgetting how to hold face to face convo's because of relying on texting too much. Start watching older people to see how they talk to others for example. You did not state it bothers you. In fact, many a teen girl like the looking only by a guy because it verifys to her that she is definately attractive as a female and boosts self confidence. Looking isn't a crime as has been stated. Staring often and for long amounts of time isn't a crime either but it can be considered bad manners and rude. If this only happens on the bus with some boy and never inside school, why not satisfy your curiosity and ask him some questions. If you dont know each others names, start with that. An example might be, "Hi, I'm Anne. I couldn't help but notice you watching me closely, staring while I ride the bus. So its made me curious. Am I sitting in a seat you'd prefer to sit in, or are you wanting to become friends and talk? If its something else or you'd rather not say, I hope you'd try to not stare so much as its quite unnerving to me and I can feel it even if I am not looking to see if you're doing it. He knows you're open to talking, you're friendly but you've also given him a wake up regarding his manners and how its affecting you.


Any bus driver is going to be at least a graduate of high school or older. Typically, college students and older people. This means if you are interested in the bus driver because you feel attracted to him, don't go there girl. No wise male 18 or older is going to try to befriend at the least or even flirt or date a younger girl as that will land them in jail. If a male is willing to go after you, he is to be considered Very dangerous. But until a male sexually harasses you,, there is nothing to complain about and if looking were considered sexual harassment, then only blind men could not be prosecuted because all men will look at females if they like what they see, no matter if married or not, young or old, etc... And for that matter, women do look at guys too, married or not, young or old, because of our sexual wiring, we will respond to either wanting to look at the same sex or the opposite sex and that is not a crime.

As far as manners go, you do not have any duty to talk to a person simply because they stare at you. While I rode school busses, the drivers were usually college age. And I never knew a driver to attempt to talk to any students unless it was to warn them to sit back down or behave. No personal talk. In fact, I was in a youth group at church and noticed one day that my driver wore a cross so I asked if he was a Christian and he said he was, going to a certain Christian Bible institute in my area. In happened to be the same one an interm college guy from the same school was working with my youth group so I asked if he knew him. Learned his name and greeted him by name whend boarding the bus, otherwise I didn't try to befriend him and he didn't with me. Its okay to talk to a person and acknowledge their presence, especially if you see them daily as boarding the bus and if it feels awkward to you to say nothing. Say Hi at the least and smile or get the persons name, greet them by name and leave it at that. If you didn't word your question right and this was not your issue at all, please reword and repost.

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Hi, I'm a 14 year old girl which will probably put you off of this question immediately. I'm not like a lot of other girls who would say I'm depressed just because it's 'cool' nowadays. For that, I am ashamed of those people because I know from a close family member that depression isn't fun or anything good.

I'm not asking for pity or because I want attention. I just want to know if this is serious enough to go to a doctor without wasting their time on yet another teenager who thinks their life is crap.

My life isn't crap. Well, I mean it could be a lot worse. My mum and I aren't rich and we live on minimal benefits but we get by. Now we have an extra mouth to feed, it's a bit tougher for my mum and she's sleeping a lot of the time now. My dad doesn't live with us now but I don't really mind much. They weren't happy so it was for the best. And the only reason they stayed together was because of me. They forced themselves to be unhappy just so I could grow up to have a happy household, except it wasn't happy for them. They admitted this too so please don't say I shouldn't blame myself.

I haven't seen my best friend in over a year which makes me feel completely alone. Even when I'm around good company with my other friends, I tend to push this thought of loneliness away. I'm happy for a while even though they must think there isn't much else to me apart from what I show to them. I know they have their problems but they think there's are shittier (pardon the language) just because they had counselling. I can't afford that, I'm afraid. I get self-conscious a lot and feel I'm not good enough for anyone in the school to even consider liking me. Now that must seem completely shallow but it's true. I would like a boyfriend to keep me company and watch movies with them on the couch. Or something along the lines of that. But no further!

The fact is that I have laid my feelings bare onto this webpage shows that I might not exactly be the wisest person ever, but I need someone's opinion. I'm so sorry for the length of this as I thought I'd make it detailed. Thank you if you do answer, in advance, I think you are truly a good person for helping other strangers out for nothing. Congratulations :) thank you.

My guess is that you are lonely but also low on self confidence, low self esteem and may have shyness. On the other hand, it may be extra work hours for Mom but one symptom of depression as you well know is sleeping alot so it may be that Mom is depressed. When the first marriage didn't work out, it's harder for a woman to feel good enough about herself to put herself out there to date again if she wants to and perhaps your Mom is feeling that, too scared to try and maybe fail. Perhaps subconsciously you're picking up on how she is feeling and it is affecting you too.

Your phrase about fearing you may not be the wisest person to be sharing this all on an advice column, caught my attention. Thank you first for your ending compliments. You may be thinking more along the lines of safety regarding the internet and not giving out personal information. Telling your story is safe. Its not safe when giving your name, the town you live in or other track able info or banking info via the net or phone to anyone. That is not safe. So as to whether this is a wise move on your part, Yes! It takes a wise person to know when they need more perspective and information in order to solve their issues or to understand something. You've probably heard teachers also say, theres no such thing as a stupid question. Whats stupid is not asking in the first place. When I was a teen, I had low self confidence and esteem and was highly shy with social anxieties. I did have a few girlfriends, the ones who approached me first. But never had boyfriends. In my sr. year of HS I finally got tired of being so shy and wanted to get beyond that. Now that I have, Its easy for me to spot those who are really shy. No one wants to hang around someone so shy because they just don't appear to be fun to be around, and most often quite the opposite is true, that everyone has something wonderful to offer in friendship to others but they just don't know it cus of what they see on the outside. If you feel ready to gain self confidence, become more outgoing, self assured and so on, let me know as I would be glad to share with you what you can do by yourself to get over it without the aid of any Drs. If you truly have a condition that does require the aid of medication, it will become obvious to you if what I share doesnt help. I am one for going to a Dr. in an emergency of course, but when not an emergency, and if you are not feeling like commiting suicide (which you didnt mention) then my first choice always is to try other healing/helping methods before seeking out a Dr. Let me know dear. As intelligent as you are, I am quite sure you can find success in losing that self-consciousness and all that sort of stuff.

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I have been really hesitant to post this because of fear of being told I am manipulating someone's "kindness" into something sinister or that I am reading too far into this, but ultimately this situation has escalated recently and I am feeling uncomfortable with it all.

To give some background, I just recently turned fifteen years old. I am a female in the 9th grade. I go to a Christian co-op (school alternative for homeschoolers, feel free to Google it) and take classes once a week. Now, I really enjoy it and have made a lot of friends there. The school is held at a church I have attended for over a decade. I used to look forward to school and it's in a safe place I have always associated with happiness and calmness, but not anymore. That's when this guy comes into play.

Let's call him "Max". Max is a senior at my school and is in one of my classes. Max is very popular in school. Max has always made me feel uncomfortable because of the way he looks at me and generally acts towards me in comparison to other people. Obviously looking at me isn't the only thing he does, but he stares at me relentlessly in class, never breaks eye contact, and smirks at me frequently. Until recently that is all he has done. About a month ago, right after my 15th birthday, he acting strangely. Let me elaborate ...
•Max has a very strange way of addressing ages, years and birthdays now. The first time he saw me after my birthday, he asked me, "When did you turn?" I was confused by this question and what it meant as he repeated it over and over until I realized he meant what age I had become. When another student (who is a junior male if it matters) mentioned they had a birthday soon as well, he only said, "How many?" If personally asked how old he is, he does not say an exact age but only says he "turned three months ago". After he turned fifteen he asked how long after I "turned" did I get my permit, and if I had fun "turning". I have never outright confronted him about it and have no idea what the purpose of this is. He apparently does not value time or acknowledging different ages or maturities.
•If I say bye or hello to someone else anywhere near him, I must also say it to him or he gets visually and verbally angry. Sometimes I have to say goodbye or hello to him ten times or he will act like I've done something horrible to him in front of all my friends.
•He offers me rides home and no matter how many times I reject him, he does not stop. He knows that I walk home despite the fact that I have never told him this. He leaves school one class period before I do, so he should not in any circumstance know how I get home.
•I have a twin sister who attends all my classes with me and Max does not acknowledge her presence or speak to her. We are identical if it matters.
•He got my phone number through a group project and now frequently texts me at all hours of the day or night. He tells me I am "beautiful" and the way I wear my hair down is "pretty", and that he hates girls who wear their hair up. He texts me late at night, anywhere from 11pm to 1am asking if I am awake. He also randomly texts me "Mmmmmmm" for no reason.
•He follows me to my lunch table, free periods and gets directly behind me when I am in line for lunch. Then he makes conversation with me, which always starts about something innocent such as cars and escalates. For example, he was telling me about his car and proceeded to say "The backseat is always clean". This is one of many sexually suggestive phrases he says.
•He sexualizes everything I do. When I get my lunch or bend down to grab something or touch my hair or smile, it's ALL apparently some sort of sexual action according to him.

That is just a generalized summary of his behavior before this past weekend.

Now, this past Halloween weekend, a huge Halloween party was held at a senior student's house and one of my friends was invited. She brought my twin sister and I along as guests. My friend arrived at the party half an hour earlier then me and called me to say Max was asking everyone where I was and Max also said he was going to be waiting outside at the door until I got there. When I arrived he was not there and was not seen until around an hour after, when he walked up behind me and told me I had "missed his amazing Halloween costume". He was dressed in normal clothes and showed me a picture of his costume on his phone. Then, in front of my friends, he called me "special" and proceed to

grab my hand and force me to touch him.

His shirt had graphics on the lower half of it and he was forcing me to trace them and trying to flatten my palm against his abdomen. I tugged my hands and became visually upset until a college student at the party walked over and told him to stop, at which point M invited me to his car. I was very angry at this point and the college student said that it wasn't happening. Max then said "he loved me" and left.

Now at this point he continues to text me. I am afraid to see him again. He is very popular in this school and has gone there for many years, and many of the teachers are like his family. This is my first year at the school and I barely know anyone. I am not sure who to tell in the school system. I want to continue going there but am afraid I will simply be told I am being ridiculous and exaggerating if I tell any teacher. The last thing I want to do is stop going to the school because of this. What should I do?

tl;dr A senior at my school texts me strange things late at night, forces me to touch him and says he loves me? What should I do?

If one of my daughters had had the same issues, I would have wanted her to come to me with it so I has her parent could handle it from there. If I were your mom, frankly I'd be outraged at this boys behavior.

I understand that many people like him and he may have behaved nicely in past years and that this is a Christian school, but there's a saying that "just because you find a mouse in the cookie jar, that doesn't make him a cookie. Same with this boy. He may have Christian parents putting him there, but his behavior is entirely his own choices, no matter his upbringing.
You need to tell your parents or legal guardians. I worked in a small company office where all the girls had everything they said turned around and turned into something sexual by one guy working there and he'd proceed to tease us about being sexually perverted. So I know what you are talking about. To call you when you didn't give out your number and ask him to call is a nuisance. I hope you've told him to never call again. But for him to call so late at night, I can just imagine what he is doing. I've had crank calls that start innocently about an ad we posted but the guy turns convo to sexual stuff, likely wanting to hear a females voice while jerking off. For some, thats all they need. He's invited you into his car and forced you, grabbing your hand at this party to make you touch him. This is all sexual harassment. Hon, boys can at this age be very horny, but that is no reason for being out of control as he is and having no respect for you. I am concerned that he may be a bit unbalanced in the brain too. I think the reason he is continueing to harass you and not your twin is that there is something about your personality that makes him think you are too quiet and shy and don't like to rock the boat and cause trouble or that you may not be quite as self confident as your sis and more likely to cave eventually under the pressure he is putting on you so that he can talk you into having sex with him. So you need to start screaming and shouting and make a big scene if he tries to grab you in any way again.

In this rough world we live in, there are pychopaths, rapists and stalkers who all tend to single out what they believe are weak, and least likely women to fight back verbally, by reporting them, and that allows them to continue this kind of behavior unchecked. If you don't, even if he does give up, he'll go on to harass and possibly force a girl and get her pregnant in the future. He needs professional help and you need to say something tomorrow. Don't try to convince the teachers. Its for your parents to do. However if they wont believe you or dont want to rock the boat and talk to the principal, then you need to talk to the principal and let him/her know about this sexual harassment. It is also a police matter being sexual harassment. You see, there needs to be a paper trail on him. It may not be something to land him in jail, but he will be warned. Then if he repeats any offenses regarding you in the future, you complain to police again and in their records is notation of your previous contact regarding his offenses and now he doesnt get away with anything as easily and those in charge at the school will be watching him carefully. Until this is resolved, make sure to allow have your cell on you or borrow a friends in case you are not at school or home and this fellow shows up. If your parents already have been made aware of what this guy has been doing, they can show up where you are at, and Dad can warn the kid to stay away from you. As for your cell phone, they need to know he's calling to buy you late at night. I think the perfect thing for the next week is for your Dad to have your phone near him or also at his bedside so that the moment this boy calls, he can pick up and yell, Leave my daughter alone or I'll be calling the police. That is what you need dear and it won't happen unless you involve the parents. This isn't your fault and it won't make you look bad, but this is scary behavior from such a young man who if not stopped now may continue on to harass others or worse.

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