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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
I know a 15 year old who wants out of his mothers place and live with grandparents. If he were to run way now to grandparents will police force him to go back home in a unstable eenvironment, or will he be able to stay with grandparents happy and safe and very well taken care of?
Fyi I am from Connecticut and I know the laws are different from each state.
Razhie is correct, the laws in all states are about the same concerning a runaway. The police must return the child to the custodial parent. There are exceptions and if you have a valid reason for running away the police will investigate before returning you to your custodial parent.
Now you have not explained why you believe your home is an unstable environment. Is mom to strict, does she waffle on what she allows you to do or not to do. This is not unstable. To be unstable she would have to be mentally impaired, be a drunk or drug addict or have a revolving door of boyfriends who live with her.
If you were to make this claim most likely what would happen is depending on where your grandparents live in. There is a 50/40 chance Child protective service (CPC) would allow you stay with them while they investigate. If they live in another state you might be brought back and put in foster care until CPS makes a determination and your grandparents request custody of you.
If your mother is providing a stable home environment. A home which is clean, has a well stocked kitchen, for healthy meals. Providing you with clean serviceable clothing, cares for you medical and dental needs and seeing to it you go to school. Then in the eyes of the law she is doing her job as a parent.
You would have to explain what you mean by an unstable environment for me or any of us to decide if that would be reason for CPS to remove you from your mother's home. If you truly believe you live in an unstable environment and want to live with your grandparents and they want you to live with them then there are two things you can do.
1)Then call them and ask them to contact CPS if they believe it is unsafe for you to live with your mother.
2)If school has not yet let out for the summer in Connecticut you can also talk with your school principal about your home life. If he or she believes you have an unstable or unsafe home life they must contact CPS.
Running away only looks bad for you. Do things the right way and it may be possible that you will get what you want.
hi im 14 a close friend of mine who is a boy stole a nude picture of me and started black mailing me and im scared to tll my parents please i need advice
You do two things, three if this is happening at school.
1. This boy is not only blackmailing you he is in possession of child pornography, the nude picture and your are under age. I can bet the blackmail is he wants you to do something most likely sexual with him or his is threatening to post the picture. This is sexual harassment and distribution of child pornography.
Because he is threatening to distribute and is in possession of child pornography has committed has 3 felonies. This is a police matter and you should call the police.
Child pornography is a very serious matter and his age will not protect him. Do not threaten him with police action for you can never be certain he will delete and destroy the picture. You call the police and file charges.
2. while you do not need your parents permission to file charges you do need to tell your parents. You have done nothing wrong. There is nothing wrong with you having nude pictures of yourself. Your parents may not like the fact that you have them and if they are not selfies they may want to know who took them. But as far as doing anything wrong or illegal, NO you have not.
3. If this boy is threatening you in school then you also need to advise the school authorities of his actions. If you file police charges he would most likely be suspended pending the outcome. If he has done any harassment at school he will most likely be expelled that is how serious this is.
Do not feel sorry for him, you have done nothing wrong and by filing charges you are sending a message to him and any other boys who think they are safe and can harass other girls this way. They cannot, the law does not give them protection for their age and their are many prosecutors who have charged boys as young as 14 as adults for doing just what is being done to you.
So call the police and tell your parents. TODAY.
20/f
I have recently met a guy who I am now dating. He is two years older than me. To me,he's the sweetest guy in the world,he loves me,he tries hard to make me happy,he treats me like a queen. But there is one problem,so to speak. His hearing is damaged so he wears hearing aid. I told my family today and their reactions are far from what I had expected. They reacted as if it were some dangerous contagious disease. He hasn't even been born like that,his ear got damaged later in life. My grandma even accused him of lying,even though he's been honest with me since day 1. My mom called him disabled. I don't even dare to tell my dad. I generally live in an environment where people are extremely judgmental. But I thought my family was better than this. I really love this guy and there is a high chance we'll hit it off and get married one day. What should I do then? I want them to accept him because I'm afraid they may forbid me to see him,yet again it's my life and I will marry who I want. I am scared,I don't want to be forced to choose between my family and him,because I want all of them in my life. He is the kind of guy I've been searching for,I won't let go no matter what. And my family are the ones who made my life possible and I love them dearly. I don't know what to do.
So your parent feel your boyfriend is damaged goods, disabled, because he is hearing impaired. Given that loss of hearing or hearing impairment is one of the more common afflictions with numerous caused from high fevers to loud noises and accidents. They are being very short sided and bigoted.
I wonder how they would feel if like me they were standing at a stop light and a truck rams into them a 60 mph and become truly disabled. Would they expect their friends to standby them or say to them, "Your damaged goods now we can't associate with you." You might ask them that question and you might be surprised at their answer for I'm sure they would expect their friends to stand by them. If so your replay then is to say then what is wrong with my boyfriend?
Leaving what I have written above aside for the moment. The fact is at 20 years of age your legally and adult and free to make your own choices. Yes it would be nice if you had your parents blessing but you don't need their permission.
I feel like I'd be a better person if I lived on a deserted island. I want to eat healthier, exercise more, clean the house more, etc. but I don't want to get fit for approval of the same jerks who devalued me when I was overweight, and I don't want my parents to think I'm a better person just because I clean the house more often. I feel I'm of the same value whether I'm in a state of depression or everything is going my way, and I feel equal to other people. When my parents compare me with my cousins or those "homeless to Harvard" stories it makes me angry. I'm currently on a break from college and people say it's great to go to college so you can make more money, numerous people have said variants of this to me, and it pisses me off because I'm genuinely into learning and improving the world, that is my motivation, not just money. I can't just motivate myself to do anything just for money, the thought of that makes me feel suicidal, just to spite that kind of mentality. I've never been a partier. I'm 20 and I haven't been invited to a birthday party with my peers since I was 14 or 15. I've had a lot of internal struggles and it's annoying when people just say it's laziness, because when I feel enough self worth to give work my best effort, I put more effort into it than others, by a long shot. But as I've grown older, and my self esteem has been chipped and chipped away, it's been hard to find that self drive, and the added pressure from my parents, on why i'm not like their ideal child, doing what they want me to do, makes things worse. I'm envious of people who say they've always felt loved and supported by their parents even when they've struggled and even when they sought careers that weren't in medicine, but still were in demand. I've never been a wild child, my sibling in elementary school has been invited to more birthdays than I have in my entire life. I've never done drugs, have never gotten drunk, don't bully others, etc. I had it rough in high school, especially when my family moved to a new town my soph year, and i feel like i've finally been able to mostly move on but when addressing the past with honesty, my mom tries to put the blame on me, like maybe something was wrong with me that people didn't want to hang out with me and it's so messed up because i was literally nice to everyone, every single person, it was just difficult due to a culture clash and that my interests varied from most other students in that area. i removed myself entirely from social media and my phone rings so little i barely recognize my own ringtone. i have childhood friends i havent spoken to in a while and its just difficult cause everyone is in college now and im far away and not currently in school and i don't know what to talk about or how to relate now that our lives are so different. part of me doesn't even want to interact, i want to work on myself, but i want to do it without it being "sad", like my parents thinking something is wrong with me for not going to the mall with a friend. i mean its not like i've ever really rejected invites, i just don't get the invites, does that mean i should drop dead or i can't find things i individually can be enriched by? with the weight thing i dont want my people to think im doing it for that same BS approval. i feel like other people judge me a lot and it's annoying, i just want to get myself back on my feet so i can go back to school and be able to be successful and do the career i love. i think not having much of a social life could even be beneficial as a worker, the problem is just being able to believe that even in spite of the attitude given by the majority of people, that popular things are cooler, that if you're not living the normal way you are messed up, and etc. im taking time off to add to my resume so i can apply to a better school, and with acceptance then i'll work with them on what community college credits will count and what wont, so it's annoyin when people just say to just go to community college now when every school has its own standards. but i work, do a lot of volunteering, and focus on other hobbies, too. im just struggling in finding confidence and self worth in my decisions, decisions that seem good in my head but in reality, surrounded by parents, aunts, uncles, other peers, etc i just feel overwhelmed and i know it's really dumb since i'm 20 and not a child anymore, but these are my real feelings. i don't normally spill everything on here but i really don't have anyone i can just talk to like this without fear, i hope someone here can relate. and i promise i can type better than this, my words are just flowing. i really appreciate any help
I can identify with some of what you have written. IT took a while and a stint in the Air Force to prove something to myself. When it did I finally decided that I don't have to prove anything to anyone but myself. In fact the only person I have to be better than is myself. To do that I came up with the following motto this has stood the test of time for me.
"The only person I have to be better than tomorrow is the person I am today." What this means to me, especially as work ethic was I needed to learn something new each day.
Before I retired I was a District Sales Manager. In Sales the motivational tool used by management was money. Make the sale make the money. I was never concerned about making a sale or writing an order. If I didn't write an order today I'd write 2 or 3 the next day. I needed to learn something new today that would help me or help me help my customers.
Management never understood me. Then again they never worried about me either for my sales number was always in the top 5% of the company. By making myself a better person each day, by learning something new that would help me grow as an individual and a professional was important to me and key to my success in life.
I am also very fortunate to have a wife who understands and supports my need to grow in this manner. I'm certain you will find someone like my wife who will support you in the same way so that you will have someone to talk to when you need to.
You may use my motto is you wish for you are right in what you say; that you not anyone else must believe in yourself, I'm paraphrasing what you said. There is nothing wrong with putting yourself first and not worrying or believing what others may think or feel. What is important is that you are successful and happy.
I am 22 year old guy finally deciding to take a swimming lesson. I went on Saturday and the class looks to have only women in it so I will be the only guy. They all look in their 30s and maybe some younger but still older than me. I called my mom and said I can't go and to cancel the lesson. She said she will if I really want to. Is this a valid concern or am I worried over nothing?
Unless you are of the Muslim faith and seeing women in bathing attire would be against your religion. I see no reason why you should not take the class.
You say they are 10 years older than you and some maybe younger. If you're 20 and maybe there is a 24 or 25 year old single woman taking the class this would be a great way to meet someone you might like to date. My mother in-law was five years older than my father in-law. There is nothing wrong with a male dating a woman a few years older than himself.
Short answer: There should not be anything to be awkward about. You all have a common goal. Go enjoy the class and learn to swim so you can have a great summer at the beach or lake.
Ok, so I have been with my boy"friend" for almost 2 years, our relationship has been good, not perfect of course, but I honestly felt like he was my life partner, my best friend. Or so he said! Well I am 7 months pregnant with our first son, 5 days ago I got a call saying that he had tried picking up a prostitute and got caught in an undercover sting. He is looking at several years in prison. He seems really sorry, but he also seemed like he really loved me. Should I wait for him?
There is something odd here. Being a John in a prostitution sting is usually a misdemeanor offence. After being booked, if they are formally booked, a desk appearance citation is issued. This is either not his first offence or he is on parole for something else and this is a violation of that parole. The Johns don't usually go to jail for several years for solicitation of prostitution.
The first thing you need to do to answer your question is to get the facts. Find out why he is being held. Court and police records are public records open to anyone wishing to see them. I am almost positive it is for something more sinister than solicitation of a prostitute.
Once you have the answer to that question and decide if you can live with someone who has hidden whatever it is he may have done. Then ask yourself these question.
1)Your his girlfriend; you're available to have sex with him; why is he out soliciting a prostitute?
2)Is this really his first time or has he done this before?
3)Is it possible he will continue to solicit prostitutes and is it possible he will bring home an infection to me? Would I still want him?
Regardless of how you answer these question; see your doctor or GYN immediately and get tested for STDS and HIV/AIDS. You can't be sure if this was his first time and you need to make sure he hasn't infected you or your baby with anything.
Im 13 and I just can't wait for sex any more I don't know why but I just wanna loose my virginity. I promised the lord and my parents ill wait till25 but i can't wait and I'm tired of jerking off.( even though it is satisfying).
I can understand not wanting to wait until you 25 to have your first sexual intercourse. Wanting to have sex at 13 is more hormonal caused by puberty than it is an actual need? Masturbation, (jerking off) is the proper way to relieve the feelings and sexual anxiety you are having from all the new hormones floating around in you.
It is really strange that parents today and before them still tell their children that it is wrong to masturbate especially when they themselves masturbated at your age and according to a recent survey they probably still do except its now called foreplay.
According to this survey 85% of us masturbate. That means in a family of four with children above the age of puberty, 3.4 of you masturbate or more realistically 3 of you do. It is not a sin by any of the recognized religions and it will not grow hair in the palm of your hand nor will you go blind.
The only time masturbation is a problem is if it is an all-encompassing thing to the exclusion of everything else. For a male your age, jerking off 2, 3 or even 4 times a day would be normal. You will taper off as you become adjusted to the hormones in you.
In fact masturbation versus teenage sex can be more satisfying. Sex is not a sport to see how many goals you can score. Sex is not something you do to prove you love or have someone prove their love for you. Sex is a very intimate act that requires privacy and comfort to be done properly. If you cannot provide a secure, comfortable and private place for sex then your partner can't relax and enjoy it. If she isn't relaxed then frankly you may as well be jerking off for you can get more pleasure from Miss Thumb and her 4 friends then you will from your partner.
So relax, continue to masturbate. There is plenty of stroke material to be had on the web; for as far as finding a willing girl your age the chances of that or probably zero. If you coerce a girl with some line like, "IF you love me you will have sex with me." That is sexual harassment and you can face legal charges.
I am a little embarrassed to ask my mum I'm 12 years old a male but how do I ask my mum to buy me new underpants?
There is nothing here to be embarrassed about. Underpants are an article of clothing just like Jeans or T-shirts. You mom wears panties which as you must know the ladies equivalent of underpants. If dad still with you he I'm sure just says to her to pick him up a package of new Jockeys or Boxers when he needs them that's what I do. So a simple request from you for the same won't embarrass mom and shouldn't embarrass her.
I'm assuming that since mom must still do your laundry she would notice if your underpants need replacing. So you either need a larger size or wish to switch to either boxers or Jockeys. If this. Of course if dad is still living with you there is no reason you can't go to him and ask him to ask mom.
While you should not be embarrassed to ask you mom to make this purchase then what you can do is leave a note on the kitchen table before you go to bed or before you leave for school were mom might find it when she leaves the house or when she comes home.
So im a 13 year old girl and my best friend is a girl. She is bi. She has a huge crush on me but she is also always pointing out really cute girls. Lately I have been getting really jealous every time she does and I think I might have feelings for her but I also think I like this guy. So am I bi or am i just confusing friendship with love? What should I do?
Why is it so Important for young people your age to put a label on their sexuality. It is very common for a first sexual experience to be between someone of the same sex when experimenting with your sexuality. This does not mean your gay or bisexual. It means you're normal.
It also does not mean at some time in the future you may not continue to enjoy bisexual sexual relations. For right now though it is safer to explore one's sexuality with a person of the same sex be you male or female.
There are also different types of love. There is the love you have for your parents, the love you have for a friend and the love you will have for a future partner in life. They are all different types of love.
To have sex with a friend be it a same sex partner or opposite sex partner it can be experimentation or lustful sex. Lustful sex can be satisfying but not fulfilling. Sex with a life partner of same sex or opposite sex is both lustful and satisfying because of a type of intimacy that comes with it.
I realize that right now this is all confusing to you and it should be because what you are experiencing is hormonally related feelings driven by the new hormones released by puberty. Don't be so fast to put a label on yourself. Just enjoy the moments and enjoy being a teenager. This is what being a teenager is all about.
Take the time to fully experience your sexuality. By that I do not mean to go and have sexual intercourse with a boy, you are way too young for that. Right now you should be setting limits as to what you will allow boys to do in the way of touching you and what you will do for them. The most important limit to set for a few years at least is never to be naked below the waist with a boy.
Even with these limitations you can still experience your sexuality.
Can I be pregnant when his pennis didn't enter my virgina but we were both naked and I released since then I ve not missed my period I went for a blood test and the result was negative.it happened around febuary and I did the test May.
Let see you had a blood test which was negative. Four months has passed and you not missed any periods. How much more evidence do you need that you are not pregnant.
Your period is the cleansing of your womb; making it ready for a fertilized egg during the next cycle. If you have sex and then get your period the chances are good your not pregnant. If you have sex and then get successive periods the chances are excellent you are not pregnant.
There are cases where pregnant women get something that looks like a period but it is actually more like spotting.
Hello, I have just graduated college last week with a bachelor's degree in Business Administration with a major in Accounting.
My parents seem to really, really want me to take the CPA exam, but the thing is, I'm not sure if I want to.
Should I take the exam to please my parents?
Or should I go for something I want to go for?
If you're not going to keep up with the certification why take the exam and waste the money. There is a benefit to having those initials behind your name especially while looking for work in either field of endeavor. Having those 3 initials behind you name can make the difference between you and someone else getting a particular position you may apply for.
My sister took the CPA exam right out of College and she believes it go it her the job she wanted. She does not need the title in the positions she has had as she has been promoted so she has not done the continuing education required to maintain her CPA.
Fact is whatever you decide to do you must do for yourself and no one else. You are an adult now responsible only to yourself and eventually to and for your spouse. I am a parent of an adult son and while he calls me for advice on many things. Ultimately he decides what it is he is going to do. It is the same for your parents. As much as they may want you to take the CPA exam the best they can do is offer your their advice and hope that you accept it.
Once again it is your life. You have to plan the pathway you wish to follow through life. If you plan does not include a future solely in the accounting field then A CPA may not be of benefit for you.
My advice is to first sit down and decide what you plans are for the future. For there are two types of people in this world. There are people whose plans fail and people who fail to plan. There is nothing wrong with having a plan that fails. You pick yourself up, find out why your plan failed and make new ones. But if you have no plan to begin with than you are hopefully lost from the start. Make your plan then decide where if any the CPA fits.
Good luck and Congratulations
I have Sound-color smell-color mirror touch ordinal lingual personification and number and letter and month color pain-sound synethesia and wondering what caused it. No one in my family that I know has it, and until recently I didn't even know this was rare till I mentioned to my mom how red the number 1 was and we searched up. How?
Below is a link to the Wikipedia website and the information they have on synesthesia. From what I was able to read I gather there are theories of why or what cause this but now true cause exists at this time.
I found the information provide to be very informative especially the information under Mechanism and Epidemiology. I suggest you take your time and read through this information as I feel it will answer most or many of your questions.
Since this is a problem related to either brain development of pathway inter action you should be seeing and treated by a neurosurgeon and or a neurologist. A family practitioner is not trained to deal with this issue though can maintain a treatment plan the other doctors might order. In any case whatever questions you have your doctors should be answering for you. If they are not then you should consider finding new doctors who will both treat the problem and make sure you are knowledgeable of your condition and answer your questions.
The more you know about this particular problem the better and easier time you will have dealing with it. You might even consider asking your medical doctor if he or she knows of a psychologist who is familiar with this problem and can help you deal with it in therapy sessions.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Synesthesia
How do u know when the baby's made? And if he puts his penis in the vigina will i get pregnant?
It would be a bit easier to answer this question if we knew why you were asking. Given the last part of your question I'm going to assume you are a young teenager of having her first sexual experience.
Most women, about 85%, ovulate between the 7th and 21st day of their cycle based on a 28 day menstrual cycle. This is the time when it is most likely that a woman can get pregnant as this is when your ovary will release and egg. Sperm will be viable, live, in a females body for 3 days so if a woman wishes to get pregnant she should have intercourse every 3 days during this time. If she does not want to get pregnant she should not have intercourse during this time.
For the other 15% of women they can ovulate at any time. Even during their period so it is very important to know when you ovulate. The cramping you feel between periods may be because you are ovulating or it may not be. The best way to find out is to get a kit which will help you track when you ovulate. They are sold at drug stores.
The answer to the second part of your question is. If you are having unprotected sex, which you should never have until you are in a long term relationship and are older. Then you should consider that anytime a boy’s penis enters your vagina you could get pregnant, even if he does not cum inside you.
During sex a male emits a fluid, precum, which he has no control over. This is emitted as a lubricant to aid in entering you and during intercourse. This precum has millions of sperm in it, more than enough to get a woman pregnant.
This is one reason you should always make the male wear a condom. The second is for protection against STDS and the HIV/AIDS virus. While a condom does not protect against all STDSD it does protect against many STD and HIV/AIDS virus.
Never; never trust your partner to be STD free unless you both have been tested together. Even if he says he is a virgin. One girl wrote us wanting to know how she got Herpes from a guy who told her he was a virgin. He told her he must have picked it up from a toilet seat. Not possible the only way to get that is from someone that has it.
Never trust a horny guy looking for sex. As the girls said when I was younger, "no rubber, no lover." That should be your motto if you’re going to have sex even if you are on birth control.
Ok so me and my husband swap partners. but its my first time and his. but here's the twist It's his dad and stepmother were swapping with. Me and her are bisexuals and weve messed around too. But now I think ive got feelings for his dad. Plus we all just did the swap once so far but before that night was planned I had sex with his dad twice beforehand when I was drinking with them. but now me and his dad kiss each other secretly goodbye and makeout and tell each other I love you and I really mean it. And its almost like he's hypmotized me with his gorgeous brown eyes which my husband also does to me. So do I just go along with the swapping like nothing or tell my husband the truth and get divorced and stay out of his dad and stepmoms relationship too. Because he wanted to do this so I had someone to give me attention because he is in to much pain or too busy. so he said to try this out. Please if you comment try to be open minded don't go all religious or be vulgar in your advice thanx!!
This is the problem with swinging. Yes we tell ourselves this is just recreational sex, fucking not love making. Then something happens and you're making love. In this situation not only can two family be ruined you could ruin your husband's relationship with his father.
Do you tell your husband about your feelings for his father. I can't really say one way or another. You could be miss reading his father's intentions. His father may just really enjoy having sex with you, a younger woman. As an older man I can see him becoming infatuated with you as sex with you I'm sure is much different then sex with his wife. You will understand this better in about 20 years when sex becomes more intimate with your husband and positions become more relaxing. You have sex for the sheer pleasure it brings and less for the positions or acrobatics you may enjoy now.
What I suggest is you tell your husband that you stop swinging with his father and stepmother. Maybe you stop swinging altogether or you find a swap group where you are less likely to swap with the same person each time and form relationships.
I have no problem with couples who wish to extend their sex life with swapping or even having open marriages. You need to be secure in your relationship with your spouse to do so and not be one to fall in love easily. sex is se and making love is making love. The mechanics of the act are the same, it is the intimacy of the act that is different. If you can't separate the two you should not be swapping.
Okay before I start this topic I just want to put a DISCLAIMER noting that this will be completely one sided and biased because it is specifically coming from my perspective (as a 23 year old woman). I know there are many sides to this issue and I won't be covering them on purpose because I am asking for advice for myself specifically.
What I have been struggling with lately is something that I know is technically a personal choice and decision, but I am so torn down the middle that I would just like some outside input.
Men, women, anyone can answer. What I am struggling with is the idea of cheating. Specifically men cheating on their wives, girlfriends. I know women cheat too. And I know there are men who do not cheat. But statistically cheating for men is the rule not the exception.
There was a psychologist who wrote a book about how cheating is so absolutely natural to men because of evolutionary purposes and what is actually ruining relationships is the expectation that a man will be capable of having sex with only one woman most of his life. He says that men desiring other women sexually doesn't mean they don't love their partner, and that it is only lust and physical. He argues marriages shouldn't be sexually restrictive and they would be more successful.
Being a person who sees things from all perspectives I understand this point, and in theory I thought I would be able to accept a relationship like this, however, Ive realized that I cannot.
This is an issue now because I met and fell in love with a man who I think is one of my soul mates, he is perfect for me in every way, however, he has been honest and straightforward with me that he doesn't think he can control his lust. He's told me he doesn't want to hurt me, and maybe for a while he can be faithful but eventually he is afraid he won't be able to resist. (the truth is that extremely attractive girls really do literally throw themselves at him). He tells me that he is in love with me and will always want me, the rest is just lust, but he knows eventually it will show up.
So basically I have the decision to make if I want to be with him or not, knowing this. He is not saying that he will go out actively looking to sleep with other people, but he did warn me that he doesn't know if he will be able to stay loyal forever and his biggest fear is hurting me.
I cannot decide. Theoretically it makes sense the whole lust thing. And maybe not in the beginning when love is passionate and strong, but what about later on? I get it. I really do think most people end up wanting to cheat. I want to be able to accept it. But then, I think of him sleeping with other girls and I cannot take it. I know that if I decide to be with him I will only want him, I am very loyal sexually once I like someones energy I only want theirs, so it is really hard for me to be ok with this. But that means losing him and he really is one of the most amazing people I've ever met. I know I am young but this connection with him is something actually out of story books.
So what do you think? cheating can be ok? never ok? I don't know what to do if I should choose to be with him knowing the risk or try to forget about him romantically and just stay friends. We are also best friends so he will always be in my life. That makes things much harder. Help??
Thank you in advance :)
I'm a male who come July will be married to the same women for 45 years having slept only in her bed with her almost every night with rare exception for out of town business meeting when I slept alone. Yes I enjoy looking at beautiful women and I have had my wife's permission to do so since the day we were married when she said; "You may look at the menu all you want but if you reorder or sample from it I will cut off something near and dear to you." Need I be more graphic then that?
In the early days of our marriage I had a position with a major airline at a major international airport. At that time flying was still fun and flight attendants were all young and very pretty. A lot of teasing went on between gate agents and flight crews and I had many opportunities to sample the menu. I never did instead; I came home and made love to my wife. In fact most of the jobs I held before retiring put me in daily contact with women both married and singe many of them very beautiful. There were plenty of opportunities and on more than one occasion a woman made a play for me.
I don't believe men are predisposed to stray. I know plenty of men who do or did the same work I did still married to the same women they married as young men. Yes there are a few on second and third wives because they can't control their lust but they are the exception.
My advice is to ask him one question and you should be able to have your answer to your question. If he can't control his lust and feel he will stray and you are willing to live with this because you love him. Is it okay with him if you allow your lust to run amuck and sleep with men you find sexually attractive. I'll make you a bet that what is good for the Goose is not going to be good for the Gander.
My dad and my mom have always had a ton of problems in their marriage. He's an addict and has never been a good father to all 4 of us kids. He's barley even acknowledged that were his. He lives in our house but he's just a stranger to me. He and my mom have gotten into horrible screaming fights and he's even gotten physical before. He's tried to choke her many times. Just today he threw her across the room and threatend " if you ever take me to court or try to get a divorce I will crush you and kill you". He's also bipolar and has anger issues which is why I'm terrified that he will just snap one day and get angry enough to kill her. He also said that if she tried for a divorce he would fight her 10x harder and win custody. I'm not sure what to do or what my mom should do. Even if she gets a restraining order or a divorce there is no doubt in my mind that he will find her and kill her or at the very least hurt her badly. All I want in life is to get away from him and for my mom to too. But I just don't think that's ever ganna be a possibility. Any advice would be appreciated at this point. Thank you
missundersmock advice is very good. You may feel it safer to call from school or the home of the friend. You MUST CALL THE POLICE for the safety of your mother and you and your siblings. If you call from the school or wish to call from school there is a support team in place to protect you. Go to the principal and tell him or her what is happening at home and that you are scared. Ask for the police to be called to the school so you can tell them and make a report. The principal must take you seriously and call the police for you as well as child protective services (CPS).
After you have spoken with the police call an organization called RAINN. RAINN stands for Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network; they will help you find a safe place for you, your mother and your siblings. Someplace where your father cannot find you or get to you. You are safe in school as the staff will not allow him to harm you or get to you while in school.
As for dad gaining custody of you and your siblings; there is no Judge in this world that would give custody to a bipolar manic depressive addicted parent so stop working on that threat, it just won't happen.
When the police and CPS come to school tell them exactly what happens at home and how often. answer their questions as completely as possible. If you don't know an answer say so. CPS is there to see to your safety and well being as well as your siblings. The Police will look out for you mothers well being.
You father will most likely be arrested and spend at least one night in jail. Use this time to help mom find a safe place for you, your siblings and her to get to so when dad is released he can't get to you and harm her.
Good luck and I'm sorry you have to be the strong one for you mother. No child should have to put in a position to protect a parent. From what you write this is something you must do.
Im a male wanting to g
iue give head
Try your question again as it makes no sense to any of us.
Hi i am 16 and i realized that i like older guys when i was 14.i have dated guys more than 5yrs older than me . I feel really bad about it but mostly only guys are attracted to me also. I am virgin still but i really want to havr sex with my now ex who is more than 7yrs older than me. We only broke up because his aunt told him to wait... i stay away from him since i dont want anything bad to happen because his aunt will take this matter to the police. I still feel sexually attracted to him and i cant move on. My 19yrs old friend i think likes me and i dont think i like him like that because i still like my ex. I am confused because my friend and i cant be together becausr of religious issues and i know fot a fact i like me ex more. But another problem is i met this guy who is also 19 he admitted to liking me but he is nice and everything but i think about me ex more than i do of him or my friend....it is clear i like my ex still but should i give anyone of the other guys a chance although i really only want to have sex with my ex and he is the only one i really trust and really love?
Simply from a legal standpoint in most states you don't have to have sex with a guy 4 years or more older than you to get them in serious legal trouble. They can be charged with statutory rape even if sex has never occurred. It is assumed it has because law in most states says that you are a minor and below the legal age to consent to sex.
The four year age difference is called the Cinderella clause. Not all states have such a clause in their laws for sex with a minor. Your friend's Aunt was right to break you two up to protect him for you are to him what is known as jail bait. Just by dating you he could go to jail for 20 years and then have to register as a sex offender.
The other things you wrote about boys your age are absolutely true. Boys your age are very immature, the confuse lust and love and are always looking for sex. It is a very frustrating age for a mature 16 year old young lady such as yourself.
I would not suggest you run off and have sex just for the sake of having sex and losing your virginity. That would honestly be like having a plate full of empty calories for dinner, you won't enjoy it and your first sexual experience is something that should be enjoyed.
Find out what the laws are in your state regarding when you are old enough to commit to having sex. It is probably 17. Depending on how long it is to your next birthday it may not be that long to wait. Then you will be well within the Cinderella clause and able to consent to sex and you and your ex can get back together again if you want.
In the mean time nothing say the two of you cannot communicate with each other. Meet in public places to have coffee and talk or to do things such as go bowling, play miniature golf, play tennis or see a ball game. Just as long as you arrive and leave separately and are in the public eye at all times. This should not be considered a date. Once again check with the police or the lawyer as I am not a lawyer or am I familiar with the laws of your state to make sure you are within the bounds of the law to keep him safe.
Hi. I'm in middle school, and I'm being bullied. Me, and my friends. Theres a girl in my class who is rude to everyone (except her friends and teachers... She's popular and i don't know why), and she calls me and my friends weird. That was it until we got into middle school. She started becoming a bit more... Much. She'd randomly spank people on the ass and laugh hysterically, or push around people. So... Today, she came over to the table where i was standing, and she tried to shove the bathroom pass UP MY ASS. I jumped out of the way and mouthed "What the heck", and she mouthed back "Go fuck yourself". I'm really confused at what to do. The last time i told on her for being a jerk, and I was the one who got in trouble. What should I do? I don't know who to tell.
So Miss "I can do nothing wrong in the eyes of those in authority is getting away murder while bullying others. Is this correct?
What you do in an instance like this is not to wait and tell someone after it happens. You call attention to it happening as it is happening. You scream your head off. Call her out right there while she can be caught red handed. "CAROL HIT ME AGAIN AND I'm CALLING THE POLICE." "CAROL YOU PERVERT TAKE YOU HANDS OFF MY ASS" "CAROL DON'T TOUCH MY BREASTS.
Scream it out at the top of your lungs, get the attention of a teacher or some adult in authority and keep screaming get hysterical until someone takes notice. Tell the others she bullies as well to do the same thing. One of two things will happen; either the school officials will take her in hand or she will get embarrassed enough to stop doing whatever it is she is doing.
I would also suggest you talk with your parents and let them talk with the principal of your school. You have the right to attend classes without being harassed. Having your parents come to school puts thing in a whole different light for your principal. He or she now has to do something to satisfy your parents or they can go above him or her to the school board. This places their position in jeopardy if enough parents find need to complain to the school board. There should not be any teachers pets in any school. All children should be treated and trusted equally.
Why does the boys sperm slides back down when i have intercourse n my hymen is broken but everytime we have sex it hurts when he go deep why ??? I need to know asap im worried because i try to get pregnant
The best sex position for getting pregnant is the doggy with your head down and ass up. The male enters you from behind and cums in you. IF you can stay in this position for 15 minutes after he cums in you. If not roll on to your back and bring your knees to your chest. This will roll your pelvis up and keep most of the sperm and other fluid in your vagina.
After 15 minutes you may stand, use the toilet and do whatever, have more sex if you want. The initial amount of sperm will have had a good head start in the race to impregnate you and not slide back out.
As for the pain you feel. There are several reasons you maybe feeling pain. The two biggest are primarily the size of your partners penis. The average Vagina is 5 to 6 inches in depth and 1 1/2 to 2 inches in diameter when aroused. If your partners penis is longer than 6 inches and is pounding away at you he is hitting your cervix which is causing you pain. If so he needs to adjust his stroke so as not to hit the bottom of your vagina. If he is bigger than 2 inches in circumference than a good lube is needed and he needs take his time and allow you to adjust to him.