about

Hi my name is Angel, that's my real name. I'm a young adult now, I've had this advice column for years, but I made another one under the name anq3l_xo when I thought I couldn't access this one. A little bit about myself. I am a student, both in college and high school. I work as a nanny part time. I want to be a lawyer when I "grow up." I believe I've done a lot of growing up in my short life. I have conquered an obsession over drugs and alcohol in the last year and a half. I'm sober now and I wouldn't trade that for the world. I'm happy now. I'm in an absolutely blessed relationship with someone that I truly care about and love with all of my heart. I have been through things that you kids have nightmares about. I have seen, heard, and witnessed a lot of things that would make full grown men cry. I believe that I am innocent now, because I don't live that old lifestyle anymore. I have a lot of experience in a lot of things, and I've always been good at shedding light on dark situations. I come from a broken family, so I have step, half whatever siblings, and I just recently reunited with my real mother after she abandoned me 10 years ago. I have amazing friends today, but it wasn't always like that. I have a wonderful boyfriend and a great relationship with him, but let me tell you, it wasn't always like that. My sister is a drug addict/ alcoholic of the worst type. She's my best friend in the entire world, and I hope this 14 year old girl doesn't have to go through what I went through. I've come to understand that I can't help her, but I can help others through advice and by being of service to people around me. I'm always here to help, leave one in my inbox on this column or my other one, or my email which is listed, and I WILL get back to you. I know what it's like to feel like nobody cares, well I care about everybody. God bless. ~Love Angel



advice

I Have this friend who is always putting themselves down and somethimes i dont know what to say becuase they arent the most attractive person and i dont want to seem fake about it. Whenever they tell me that there ugly or whatnot...im always like dont put yourself down like that your not ugly. Every time i talk to this person they always tell me how ugly they are! PLEASE HELP ME IN WHAT TO SAY TO THEM!!

Tell her good things about herself until it makes her sick, but don't worship her if you don't want to. If she's being negative about herself, just say something positive about her, or just change the subject. Try talking to her about how you don't like her negativity. Be a friend to her, don't lie, just tell her her good points, and don't bring up the bad ones. I hope I helped. Good Luck! -Angel

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alright, well today on january 3rd,2005, i called this kid named pat that i really really really like and hes 18, but he has a girlfriend and i asked if he wanted to chill and he said yeah and that he'll call me sometime cause he has my number..but i was really jealous when he said he was chillen with his girlfriend when i called him, and i really like him and i dont know if hes really gonna call me back. i think its a crock of shit but hes wicked nice and mature ..what do you think? is he gonna call me back or no? and do you think i should be jealous of that girlfriend?

SIgned - heartbroken&confused

Well, he may or may not call back, I don't know the guy, but he sounds like the type that may either take a long while, wait for you to call him, or he wont call you. It's understandable that you would be jealous of his girlfriend, but it's not HER you're jealous of, it's her relationship with this guy. Remember that. He may be a "wicked nice and mature" 18 year old guy that wont call you because he has a girlfriend. But you should call him and talk to him, tell him how you feel. good luck, hope I helped. -Angel

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I thought that my now ex-boyfriend didn't like me any more so i broke up with him but I still really liked him. Then I went to a party and he was there and we really didn't talk to eachother untill they played the first slow song and he came up and just grabbed my hand and pulled me to the dance floor and we started slow dancing. Then when that song was over i was just like okay... but then they played Alicia Keys "if i aint got u" and so we kept dancing and he looked me in the eyes and was like i still love you and i was like i love you too... and then everyone started counting down for the new year and before it was 12:00 he kissed me and was like "last kiss of 2004" and then when it turned 12:00 he kissed me and was like "and first kiss of 2005" and i felt like it was my first kiss all over again. But later when i talked to him he was like I think we should wait a while before we go back out because I always just come back to you... but the thing is that i really really love him and i want to get him back now... what should i do to show him how much i love him and for him to ask me back out... should i just ask him out? before i broke up with him we had been dating for 5 months... i don't know what to do I'm so confused

It's hard to love someone who's making you wait for them. My advice is, make him wait a little too, play hard to get and stuff, make him want you. That way, he might ask you out, or it will just speed up the "waiting" process. I think that whole story is really sweet by the way, brings tears to my eyes in fact. But anyways, to show how much you love him, maybe you could give him a cute little gift, nothing fancy, but just something to show you're thinking about him. Maybe just a simple card that says, "I miss you..." that would be really cute. Anything to get his attention and make him want you. I hope that you guys get back together, don't be confused, things will work out, just watch. I hope I helped. Good luck and please keep me posted? -Angel

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I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 1/2 weeks and I really like him. My only problem is that I'm afraid to trust him because I don't want to get hurt emotionally. I've heard that he cheats on his girlfriends, and he lies, and he's dirty, and he's just using me, but when I'm with him, he tells me and shows me that he's not like that at all. I really want to be able to love him, but will I regret it? Should I let down my guard? He's 3 years older than me if it helps. Thanks in advance.

You gotta do what you think is right. Follow your heart. If you love him and he loves you, then rumors shouldn't matter. He may have done those things in the past, but that doesn't mean he will do them to you right? Trust your heart. If you think that he's worth it. Then please, for him, let your guard down. He may really need your love as much as you need to love him. There will be no regrets, as long as you learn from it, maybe he is right for you, but if he isn't, life goes on. Maybe you could talk to him about what you've heard. Good luck sweetie, I really hope I helped and that things work out for you and your boyfriend. Keep me posted? -Angel

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My dad is making my life a living hell...hes drinking and smoking weed agian and hes a mean drunk...i used to be able to talk to him but now im scared of him...he has drovin me and my sister to cutting...i want to stop but cant becuz id rather die then live in this hell whole...plz help!
-HH

Call child protective services on him, you shouldn't let yourself be in that potentially dangerous situation. If you can't talk to him and you're pretty lost in this situation, there is help for you, but it's not on an advice website. You need to help yourself and your sister by calling for help. Your dad will eventually turn himself around and things will go back to how they were before. This is really hard, believe me I know, just be strong, keep your head up, and don't let these hard times get the best of you. I really hope that things work out for you. Keep me posted please. I'm always here. -Angel

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I really really really hate my moms boyfriend and everyone thinks he's so nice and that im crazy but im not. It's hard to explain but what should I do! Im thinking of moving with my dad is that the right choice? I've talked to my mom but its like she wont listen she always tells me to be open minded but shes the one who need to know that I cry every night and I'm really hurt inside because I dont like him. please help!

Move in with your dad, that should show her how you feel. If she decides to pay attention to your feelings and break up with the guy, then you should go back if you want. It's hard, but it's the right thing to do in this situation. Your mom should realize your feelings. Hope I helped. -Angel

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well. im fourteen, and my mom won't let me wear thongs yet!!! my sister said if i asked her she probably would say yeah, my sisters like 28.. i have thongs and stuff, but i want to be able to bbuy them with my mom, we were in rue21. and thongs are like .99 cents each, so i thought i'd buy my friends each one for christmas, my mom let me. but she won't let me get any!!! its not like im gunna let it hang out or anything, my panty line ALWAYS shows, and people pick on me for it. what should i do? I've tried without underwear, and find it completely uncomfortable. how old were u when your mom let you wear it? thanks

Well, my parents have pretty much let me do whatever I want, and if they don't I do it anyway. Not that I'm a good person to look upto or anything, but me wearing thongs became an issue in 5th or 6th grade, and I told them why I wanted to wear them, and they gave me money and dropped me off at the mall with my friends. So when I was about 10 or 11. Talk to your mom about it thoroughly, so it gets through, then ask her. She should let you, but I wouldn't suggest having her go buy them with you, that would be uncomfortable for her, and probably you too. But good luck, hope I was of some help. -Angel

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do you think its better to fit in and go agianst yur own beliefs OR to be a little ""less popular"" and do what you want to do? i am stuck in between.

Do what you want to do. Popular kids are fake and have too much drama. The only people that like them are themselves. They're also not really good friends. Hope I helped. Good luck. -Angel

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Okay,everyone at school always calls me a slut and a hoe and a whore and i never even did anything! They won't stop and it's really getting on my nerves. I don't think I am, but when you hear it all day from all of your friends you start to believe it and that's kind of what's happening! But i don't know what to do! Please help! i rate

I'm sorry that you have to deal with that. My best advice is just to not believe it, it's really hard, but just ignore it seriously. I had the same problem, and now that I don't care about that, I've found it less stressful, and I think it lets me be more, like, free. Just shut out the rumors and the lies. It's hard, but I think you can do it. Hope I helped and good luck. -Angel

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my sister gets white stuff in her under wear what is it I mean I get it too but I dont want to ask her

It's discharge, all/most chicks get it, nothing to worry about. -Angel

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Hi DOCTOR ANGEL. i WAS WONDERiN iF YOU COULD TELL ME HOW TO ROLL ON A CONDOM ON MY MAN'S PENiS. WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER FOR 2 YEARS. AND WE'RE NOW BOTH READY TO DO iT. SHOULD i HAVE HiM WEAR TWO? i ALSO HEARD THAT iF YOU FiNGER THE GUY iN THE...UM...BUTT LOL. THAT iT'LL GiVE THEM A BiGGER ORGASM. i NEED TiPS ON TO GiViNG MY MAN HiS FiRST GREAT SEX. THANKS DR.ANGEL. XoXo ALANA

How to roll on a condom? Front to back. Two condoms? One is enough. Fingering the anal hole? Whatever turns him on I guess. Tips on his first great sex, whatever he wants. As long as you're both happy, it should be pretty good. Good luck, Hope I helped. -Angel

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Ive been with my boyfriend for along time and he wants to have sex and i dont no i love him soo much and he loves me i no he does and everytime we r together its soo perfect and he said hes not guna force me but he thinks this will lock r relationship and then we ll be together forever and ii rele think hes telin the truth...should i do it?
Sexually confused..

If you love him and really trust him, then you should go for it. Don't do it if you feel forced or anything, as long as you're comfortable. Use protection and be careful. Hope I helped, -Angel

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hi i asked...
im always sad inside , but no body knows cosz i dont show it... how can i get the emptiness in my heart to go away... signed , confused and lonely.

well i no whats bothering me inside.. its that my X boyfriend has gone out with at least 4 of my best friends.. and now hes going out with my closest one .. lets call her shelly - i think hes just using shelly but i really really still like him and i think im crazy for dumping him =\ i dont no how to tell him this .. can you PLEASE give me as much advice as possible..

signed , lonely - again .

All you can really do is talk to your ex-boyfriend and your friend and see what they can do to help you. If your friend really cares about you, she will probably be more helpful. If your ex still cares about you, then when you tell him that you're hurt, he might do something, but exes dont usually don't do anything about these kinda things. You could tell him that you still like him and that you feel bad for breaking up with him, that may get something off your chest at least. I'm really sorry if this doesn't help, I'm trying the best I can. But I really do hope things work out for you, good luck and keep me posted sweetie. I'm always here. -Angel

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Well ya c my boy friend the other night asked me to give him head and i wanted to except i dont know how to!!!!!Like he always eats me out and i wanta do somethin for him!How do u give someone u love head???lol
Love always, Betty

go fast, and slow, and be gentle, and don't use your teeth, and don't give him blue balls. Hope I helped. -Angel

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I just dont know I am 13/f and all my friends had had there first kiss. bUt I havent how old where yall out there and I think I mess up when I kiss the guy when its my first I mean I kiss my friends on the ckeck and all the guys to but thats just as friends I just dont know plz help

You wont mess up kissing on your first time, don't worry about it. A lot of my friends haven't had their first kiss, and I'm older than you, so don't even worry about it. I had my first kiss when I was realatively young, but it's not important how old you are. Don't be nervous about it, act like you've done it a million times before, and just relax, because the other person will be able to tell if you don't know what you're doing. Good luck, hope I helped. -Angel

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im 12 i live in nevada letz say, that I have 4 really great best friends and at a period in time each of feel like a third wheel. Now on this moment different. one of the girls felt like we dont pay enuff attention to her, and now since we cleared time to hang out more it seems like she isn't with us. WHAT DO I DO! lolz iz a weird thingie reply bk plz teheheheheh k bye thnxX so MuCH xOxOx ~!~vANESSaH~!

Vanessah,
Try talking to your friend about how you try to include her, and she's just never there. She should understand, maybe she just needs her space. You should really talk to her about it. That's really the best I can give you except maybe try calling her more and maybe see why she can't/doesn't want to hang out when you try to include her. I don't know if this helps, but good luck. Keep me posted. -Angel

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what are some really good ways to get a guy to really like you? and don't just say flirt and be yourself i want like really good ways of flirting and things to do with them and just anything that is really helpful. Thanks I will rate you if it is good.

flirt with him, tease him a little bit, look into his eyes, pretend like you're gonna say something, then just look away and smile, stupid little things like that will keep him guessing and wondering. Ways to flirt: give him a compliment, but don't worship him or anything. Like yourself too though, don't talk about yourself too much, ask him what he likes, mention if you like it too. But you do need to remember to be yourself. I wouldn't necessarily say that this is really helpful, because when you start talking to him you're just gonna do what you wanna do, but I hope I helped, good luck and keep me posted. -Angel

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i like my bf so much im 14 nd we've done everything except sex and anal i love him so much but lately i havent been hanging out with my friends as much and he gets mad wen i do i noe he dont trust me but idc but i wanna hang out with friends!! i miss them and like wen i do he gets mad and we hardly talk and my dad sed if i dnt start hanging out with my friends then hes guna end me nd my bf nd like i told my bf that nd we started crying nd stuff nd he sed he didnt wanna loose me but he cant get over the fact that were guna have to break up if i dont start hanging out with my friends ...either way he gets mad at me ..what should i do
x3 confused

Well, as sad as it sounds, you really gotta choose betweent your friends and your boyfriend, unless you can hang out with your friends and your boyfriend at the same time. If you really want things to work with both of them, then you should figure this one out by yourself. Good luck with this one, Hope I helped. -Angel

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i know its stupid but all my friends and other guys in my grade keep giving me crap about the guy i'm going out with. i love him so much. and he means the world to me. i hate it when people give me this crap though. and one of my friends that i thought was my friend did something that she "claims" she didn't do. its a long story, but i didn't think she'd do it. i don't know how to handle it. please help me. i need to know what to say to people when they give me this crap. thanks in advance. i rate high.

when they say bad things about your boyfriend just tell them "does it look like I care? I don't think that about him and that's all that matters so f*** off" then just walk away, not mad or anything, but satisfied. Good luck with this one. Hope I helped. -Angel

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Hello. Um, I have a problem with this guy who lives in my neighborhood. Everyday he harasses me sexually. I've tried telling the police, but they said without hard evidence they couldn't do anything. I'm sort of a feminist, so something like this shouldn't be a problem for me. But, I'm too afraid to tell my friends or family. I'm 16 and he's like, 25. So, I know it's illegal.
What should I do?

The police should believe you, that's ridiculous. Just try avoiding the guy for a while, bring a friend with you wherever you go, or someone just to be a witness. Tell your friends and family right away before something bad happens. Hope I helped and good luck -Angel

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