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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
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I really thought I could handle myself. I didnt think I would resort to writing this to all of you here on advicenators. My dad found out from a source that he is going to be fired, not because of himself as a worker, because he is an excellent worker (he works in buisness in an office.) but his whole unit is being fired because of the economy, and companies cant offord to pay salaries anymore. Im a daughter in a family of 6, im 17, and Im American, and caucasian. It sounds minor, but its not. I feel horrible, my family feels horrible, my dad feels the worst of all. My mom has never had to work before because my dad provided, but a little while ago she got a job, thank god. But she only makes a quarter of what my dad makes. I just dont know what to do. It makes me sick to see my dad so upset, even though I know hes trying to hide it. I pray everyday he will keep his job, but it seems pretty final. I cry everyday and everynight.
I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others. I
There is a lot of information missing from your question that would make it easier for me to offer you advice. Since the information is missing I will make some assumptions’ and if I am wrong in those assumptions please excuse me.
First; things are not as bad as they may appear to you. Generally when am employer closes a unit, as you say is the case with your dad, there is a severance package that is based on years of service. The package generally includes continuation of salary and insurance for a specified period of time. Next, your father will also be eligible for State unemployment benefits. While these benefits vary from State to State to State the generally extend for 26 weeks and because of the present economy many States are extending them beyond that point.
Financially things may not be as bad as they appear to you. Your father may feel bad for several reasons, most of all for losing his job through no fault of his own. I know how your father is feeling right now as I lost my job because of a disability resulting from an auto accident. I will never be able to return to a job a loved and it has taken a long time for me to come to terms with that. Your father has the prospect of re-employment. Yes, the job market is tight right know, but there are jobs out there for those who are willing and able to work, and have good employment records. From what you have written your father meets all those conditions.
Now what can you do to help? You can start by helping your mom around the house with the cooking cleaning, laundry as well as well as caring for your younger siblings. If you are still in High School, stay in school. If you have finished High School and were planning on going to College away from home consider attending a local Community College for the first year while your dad gets’ back on his feet.
Something’s are not always as bad as they first appear. Once everyone gets over the initial shock of things and can think clearly again, plans can be formulated to weather the problem. You said your father is a good worker; as such he is also a good thinker and planner. Your job now is to help him get over the initial shock of losing a job, a job he has probably held for some time and enjoys, so he can think clearly and make proper plans.
As I have said things may not be as bad as they appear to you so please cheer up. If you are cheerful others in your family will be cheerful which will also be helpful to your parents. Your job now is to be as helpful as you can around the house, stay in school and get good grades and try not to add to you parent worries.
I keep getting these terrible soare throught like not being able to swallow drinks or food and i can barly breath,when i look in the mirror my tonsils have holes in them and a huge whiht or yellow bubble in the back of them and i want to know the symptoms because my mom is going to take me to the emergeny room so plzzzzzzzzzz reply as soon as possible thanks thanks thanks thanks plzzzzz reply fast
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
From what you have written and what I was able to research it sounds as if you just may have Tonsillitis. Again from what I have read most cases respond well to antibiotics and are prescribed if the doctor believes you have a strep infection. If the doctor believes the infection is viral the antibiotics will have no effect and the doctor will recommend things for you that will make you more comfortable while the virus runs its course.
While Tonsillitis is usually associated as a childhood disease I have known people who have become ill with this particular malady well into their adulthood. So if you are upset by the thought you have some children’s illness don’t be. Also don’t be too concerned about having your Tonsil’s taken out. There are two reasons I say this; first doctors today are not as quick as they once were to take someone’s Tonsil’s out as they were just a decade ago. Second, should yours have to come out it is a simple procedure usually done as an outpatient. You rest at home for a week or so eating all the ice cream or ices you want.
Hope you feel better
Hi,
I have come across several answers of yours to other questions on this site. You always post
"I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others."
Why is this? I'm not being mean I am trying to understand why..I am truely offended by this only because I feel insulted as it comes across as an insult to those who are younger than you. It sounds conceited. Could you please stop?
The people that write to this website may be looking for advice from their peers. The fact that I am of an age that is closer to that of their grandparents or parents is something they should be aware of when they read my answers. It is not meant to offend other columnists on this site.
One thing I have been pleasantly surprised by is the degree of caring I see in the answers given to many of the questions. I may not always agree with the way the answer is given the accuracy of the answers is general right on.
Call my preface in my answers my own version of truth in writing as I don’t wish to mislead anyone into thinking I am someone I am not. If you like just call it old age, but as I said it is not meant to insult anyone.
I hope you understand and I have answered your question.
My fiance and I are getting married in December, and we really want to go on a nice honeymoon, because shortly after the wedding, he will be going into military training. we would like a cruise or a nice stay at a tropical location.
Ive looked at some travel websites like travelocity, and expedia, etc, but im a little hesitant to set up anything because im not sure how reputable they are, or if there are going to be hidden fees or anything. im kinda nervous about it.
does anyone have any suggestions on good, reputable travel websites?
do any of you have any experiences with this? Id like to hear about your trip and where you booked it and how much it cost.
I hope someone can help me out
Steph 21 =]
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
I have never booked a vacation with any of the websites you mentioned, although my sister has without any problems. There are alternatives to booking vacations through travel sites especially for a cruise.
You can book your cruise directly with the cruise line you wish to sail with on line or over the phone. They will handle all the arrangements in getting you from your home to the ship and back again. Use the web to find which cruise line you want to sail by selecting a cruise based on where you want to sail to and how long you wish to sail. Trips last from 5 to 15 nights.
For tropical vacations you can use a local travel agency or book your vacation with the airline you would like to fly with. All the major airlines have vacation packages to all the major tourist spots.
Wherever or however you chose to travel if you are going to be leaving the country you are going to need either a passport or the new travel documents for travel to Mexico and Canada. These documents take time to acquire so I would advise you to start checking on what documents you need and how to acquire them.
I take Tramadol to deal with the pain of a spine condition. When I take it, I'm in the best mood, I love life, I'm happy, and nothing offends me. The second the pills start wearing off I'm a miserable grump and I bitch at everyone. Why would a pain medication give me such crazy mood swings? Anyone else have this problem?
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
As someone who also suffers from Chronic Pain, it may not be the medication causing your mood swings. What I have found in dealing with my Chronic Pain is pain causes depression and depression causes pain. It is somewhat of a vicious circle but one that can be treated successfully.
I would suggest you talk with your doctor about your mood swings. If you are suffering from a form of depression your doctor will have to change your medication as Tramadol is not recommended with antidepressants.
The fact that you have a form of depression does not mean you are crazy. What is most likely happening is your body is not producing enough of a hormone your body needs to help you cope with your Chronic Pain. The Hormone is Serotonin, there is a very good article on WebMd on Serotonin should you care to read it.
My suggestion is for you to make an appointment to see your doctor, I believe the problem you are having can be corrected with an adjustment to your medication.
Is it really that important to live near family?
1. Wherever we move, we will set up a business, therefore it will not be an option to "pick up and move if we don't like it."
2. We are in love with an area where we have no family, and ideally would like to move there.
3. Would like to have kids in the next few years and ideally want family around us.
4. So which is it? Live in an area you love, or live near family?
The decision has damn near become unbearable.
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
The problem as I see it is one of possible future regret; regretting not trying something you thing you love. As to whether it is important to live near family? That is a very individual question and depends on how important family is to you and your spouse. Regardless of how close your family is, you will manage to raise your children with or without their help. You’re business will succeed or fail with or without their help.
So the real questions come down too: 1) How important is family to you and your spouse? 2) Just how in love are you with the area that you have no family in?
I cannot answer the first question for you, but I do have a suggestion for the second question. Statistically most new businesses fail in the first year. Given the present state of the economy I would not think this is not an ideal time for a start up business. The economy is slowly turning around and in about a year things should be looking better. Why not take this time to go to this area you like, find an apartment, job(s) and use the next year to explore the area. This suggestion will serve several purposes; you can find a location for your business and see if the area will support your business. You will also have the time to really explore the area and assure yourselves that this is where you want to put down roots and raise your family. Last you find out if being this far from family is what you and your spouse are comfortable with.
A one year trial period is not that great an investment in ones future. Trying something and finding out it is not to your liking is not a failure. It is a proper investment of time and energy to assure that when you do invest more than just time you have invested properly. This move appears to be a major step in your lives. My suggestion is one of caution that will bear the best results for a better life in the future.
Best of luck
um well i have started school and there is this guy in my chem class who likes me well that what i think he feels like a stalker he asks me to many personal question he says that he sees me the hallways but i never see him he even messaged me and asked if im a outt or a inn ! i dont know how to tell him to leave me alone my friends say imtoo nice thats how i got a stalker! what should i do?
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
Since this boy is stalking you at school you have several choices in how to handle this situation. Before I go into the solutions I am going to suggest let me explain why I believe it is important you get this matter resolved quickly. If this matter is not correct immediately this young man will grow up to believe stalking is an appropriate way to show his affection and to get what he desires. As you know stalking is a form of harassment and in many states is a criminal violation anywhere from a misdemeanor to a felony depending on the degree of stalking. So by taking one of the suggestions I am going to make you will not only be teaching him a life lesson you will be saving other young women from harassment by him now and in the future.
Solutions:
1. Talk with your parents about this asks and them to help you in the following.
2. Talk to the school administrators about this young man’s stalking and ask them to; a) take the appropriate disciplinary action and b) to reassign him out of your Chem. class.
3. If the school administration does not take what you parents feel is appropriate action they can always ask the police for assistance.
Stalking is serious; it not only makes you feel uncomfortable but in many instances is considered a criminal offense. This young man may feel that he is only fooling around, the fact that you have asked him to stop is where it changes from fooling to criminal. Talk with your parents. Discuss with them how you feel about this situation and what I am suggesting and then follow their advice or their handling of the problem.
Most important here is that you feel safe in school and are safe.
I know I've never been close to my family and they all call me heartless and mean because of how I act. The thing is I have a really short temper, like if someone got me angry I would actually go blind, like I pushed my father before who is 60 years old.
It's weird that I can be so mean but it's not because I'm mean, it's because they're so horrible it's sad to have them as my family, I feel like they are strangers. Sometimes I ask my myself 'why am I here?' or how come I feel like that.
When my mother hugs me or kisses me, I feel disguised. And right now my sister is getting divorced and she's only been married for 2 months, so she asked me for my help to tell my parents but all i did is yell at her for being childish, because it was her desision to get married to this guy and now she wants to leave him and that is major offence to my family to have a divorced daughter and shit. I was like call me and she goes like "you know i get shy to talk on the phone and I am going to start crying" so i got really angry and said really horrible stuff to her, and now she doesn't want to talk to me and I really don't care, like I don't mind (seriosuly deep deep inside I don't give a F****). And when my father was in hospital I didn't give a F**** either nor bother to go to the hospital for a visit. I know I'm mean because they are all s o evil and mean, and they all made my life a living hell but ... Is it normal to feel like they are strangers and when they touch me I feel disguised?
I'm very nice to others, like people always tell me Your some we can trust to be there for us and such but I just can't take my family, I think it's only because I feel like they are strangers.
ugh help
I cannot say if how you feel toward your family is normal or not. What I do feel is you are not alone in how you feel. I myself am among those who have disgust for a parent. In my case it is my father who I have not spoken to in over nine years. It was not till I was seriously injured in an auto accident and suffered a bout of deep depression as a result of my injuries that I fully understood why I am so disgusted by my father. Working with a trained psychologist I found that what I always felt my father had held against me from childhood was actually something that happened about the time of my conception.
So as I said you are not alone in how you feel. I feel you too may have a form of depression that is fostering some of your feelings. I would suggest you seek out a psychologist for some talk therapy. The therapy may not change how you feel about your family but will allow you the insight you need to understand your feelings. Once you understand your feelings and why you feel as you do then you can work on how to deal with them. Once you have done this you will feel better about yourself and how you deal with your family. Once you feel better about yourself any depression you are suffering should abate.
Please read this! Ok my name is Farrah and i am a 13 year old girl who is pretty obese. I get embarrased all the time with my friends because they are all skinny. I am tired of being fat!!! Does anyone have anyone good diets easy to make and good. Maybe even some good exercises that are also affordable and easy. Any advice will help and some personal experience would be greatly appreciated! PLEASE HELP! -overweight Farrah
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
The fact that you want to lose weight is great, but you must want to do it for the right reasons if you want to be successful. First thing to understand is that not everyone is destined to look like the fashion models. Set obtainable goals for yourself. You did not gain the weight overnight so do not expect to lose it over night. A lose, on average, of between ½ and 1 pound a day over a months’ time may be right for you and obtainable. One other thing to remember, I am not sure if this applies to teenage females, but females for some reason do not lose weight as fast as males so please do not become frustrated.
With that said, before you start your diet you need to check in with your family Doctor. No one should start any diet without a complete physical and without being under a doctor’s supervision. There are physical reasons for being overweight that all the dieting in the world will not overcome. Mostly this has to do with thyroid problems and is a simple test the doctor can do to make sure yours is working properly.
Once you doctor clears you for dieting follow his/her instructions for exercise and proper diet if offered. If your doctor does not offer you a diet and exercise program you might want to follow the program I found in an article in a Readers Digest article online, I will put the link at the end. Finding a nutritionist to work with is also helpful as is finding a psychologist who specializes in weight loss to talk with. All of these people should be covered under your parents’ health insurance policy if they have one, although the visits to the nutritionist and therapist may be limited.
As for exercise, the best exercise for someone just starting out is brisk walking. Swing your arms while walking that way you are exercising most all your muscles. Start out by walking as far as you are comfortable then each day walk a little further. You want to work your way up to a brisk walk of at least 45 minutes.
www.rd.com/living-healthy/easy-ways-to-lose-weight-50-ideas/article16057.html
To start off I will tell you about myself. I am a 21 year old mexican girl. I live wit my parents. Currently no job and I go to college full time.
I have a wonderful boyfriend of 3 years. He is turning 21 in december. And I was going to throw him a huge party. But he would rather go on vacation to cancun for a week. He says he would pay for everything for me which include flight, hotel, food, anything. Just me and him. ROMANTIC! I know. And probably some(2-3) cousins that live in mexico. Its wonderful, exciting. And I want to go really bad..
But here's the thing. I am the first born. I am the baby of the family and my parents would need a ton of convincing to let me go. I need help on tips to convince them. Please help anyone.
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
I do not fully agree with the other writers’ answers. Yes, you are 21 and you do not legally have to answer to your parents about where you are going and what you are doing. In the same vane your parents are not legally obligated to pay for college and supply free room and board while you attend college. This is a time for mutual respect. Rather than ask their permission, ask for their opinion about you vacationing with your boyfriend. This slight change in how you present what you wish to do makes a big difference in how it is received.
You say you are the first born and the baby of the family. This also makes you daddy’s little girl. And no matter how old you get he will always see you this way. Remember this when you speak with your parents for what your dad is going to see is some strange man sleeping in your bed. Even if the two of you are not sleeping together that is what your father will see. Trust me on this one, I married daddy’s little girl and until my father-in-law past away I was the man that slept with his little girl.
You have every right to go on vacation with your boyfriend, with or without you parent permission. Getting your parents approval will depend on how you present your plans to them. Have a printed itinerary ready for them, the phone numbers of the hotel(s) or his family’s homes and acknowledge that you will keep your cell phone with you and charged. You should also promise to call them at least once a day at an appointed time, remember to allow for any time difference, each day.
One other thing; All your planning will be for nothing if you do not have a passport or new travel documents. I am not sure when the new travel restrictions start or if they have started. But without a passport or the new travel documents you may not be able to get back into the country.
i'm trying to find new and exciting things to do with my girlfriend but i'm debating on some things. i want her to piss on me. should i let her?
Since I am not sure if you are an adult, over age 18, or a teenager I will keep my answer generic. When it comes to sexual activities what is most important is that both partners are willing to participate in whatever activity you wish to indulge in. If not there can be no real enjoyment in that activity for either partner if you have to beg your partner to participate.
As for the answer to your question: If you are BOTH WILLING why not try it. I would recommend doing it in the bath tub the first time as it is quite a messy activity without rubber sheets. Afterwards you can both shower together which can also be exciting.
What's the best brand of peanut butter?
It would appear that Jiffy is preferred 3 to 1. I like both of them and my wife buys whichever is cheaper at the time we need Peanut butter.
ok well for some reason im extremely worried about getting pregnant. and i always think i am or i could be i let it interfere with alot of other things in my life...i even told my fiance that we shouldnt have sex until i get on birth control or wait til we get married but sonehow we always get in the moment and i cant help myself...i mean we dont use condom b/c i dont really like them even though i know we should and he pulls out everytime....but idk what to do to get over this...or to get it off my mind besides not having sex or using a condom...is it rare to get pregnant if he pulls out??? any advice??
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
Your current form of birth control is the least effective method of preventing pregnancy. While the withdrawal method may keep your fiancé from ejaculating in you, the pre-ejaculate contains several million sperm. When he climaxes the ejaculate contains several million sperm. While the odds of pregnancy increase with the number of sperm, it still only takes one sperm to fertilize one of your eggs.
The information below was found on the following website. It is a question similar to yours and the answer given. You may want to visit the site for more information.
www.scarleteen.com/article/advice/can_pre_ejaculate_cause_pregnancy
QUESTION: I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 28. We've been having sex for a year now and we have not been very careful at all. We never use condoms! It's weird though cause I have not gotten pregnant. He usually doesn't ejaculate in me LOL but still. . . . I always joke and tell him he's sterile but now I'm really thinking he is. Since I haven't gotten pregnant does this mean there is something wrong with my boyfriend or me? Or does it just mean I'm lucky?
Heather replies:
If you are not looking to become pregnant, then chances are good you have just been very lucky so far. Generally, in one year of sex without any method of birth control, around 80 - 90% of young women will become pregnant. So, for now, it seems you've been that 10 - 20% of women who haven't...so far.
However, it doesn't sound like you haven't actually been using NO method at all, you've been using withdrawal, just not consistently. According to sound sources like Contraceptive Technology and Planned Parenthood, used perfectly, withdrawal is around 96% effective, but in typical use (the way most people use methods), it's one of the two least effective methods there are: it's only around 73% effective with typical use.
My advice is: If you do not want to use condoms and your doctors will prescribe hormonal contraceptive for you that you ask your doctor to do so. The Pill is the most effective form of birth control we have today. When the male contraceptive pill is marketed it will be even more effective than the female pill but that is still several years away.
As long as you continue this method of birth control you are going to continue to worry about pregnancy. You say you do not like condoms but do not say way. If it is not due to a latex allergy you might try different brands until you find one you both like. Until you find a safer form of birth control the worry of an unwanted pregnancy is always going to be with you.
I'm 24 and female and I lost my virginity to a guy that I fancy the pants off! It wasn't at all what i expected and I was drunk and so was he and it was just...well, not that great.
I saw him last night and had to speak to him beacuse I just don't know how to feel about the whole thing and his words went a little something like this: "Well I had fun it was a laugh" and I was like "pardon and what now?"...He actually doesn't give a shit about me and I can't believe I waited that long to lose my virginity and it ended up being with an absolute CUNT! I've cried constantly for the whole entire day and I can't eat cos I feel sick. How long does it take to get over this? I hate him. He's ruined everything :(
Thanks
xxx
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
That guys a jerk. Drunk or sober he should have realized that you gave him the most precious gift a woman can give a man. The fact that he does not realize the gift you gave him makes him an ass and not worth your tears. He may have appeared to be a prize catch but my advice is to throw him back in the sea. There are far more men out there who would love to honor you by getting to know you and not just see you as an object of their sexual satisfaction.
As for waiting this long to have sex: When to have is a very personal decision and something that should not me made under pressure from peers or anyone else. The longer one waits the better it will be for you are not only more mature but you do not have to sneak off and hide or rush the act. Rather you can relax and indulge in privacy and intimacy, which is what sex, is all about.
In today’s world young people see sex as a recreational sport. As they get older they find sex is part of how they define their life mate, as sex is still a large part of couple’s intimate life, as it should be. Sex is no longer viewed as being solely for the purpose of procreation and it is expected that both partners are to enjoy themselves. You skipped the recreation sports part and frankly missed nothing other than a lot of frustration from many a coitus interrupt-us and back seat slam bam thank-you- mam if the boy thanked you at all.
I would be remiss if I did not remind you to practice safe sex. I would suggest you view the web for condom usage both male and female condoms. Yes there are such things as female condoms which many couples prefer to the male condom.
Again, please do not waste your tears on that guy, he is not worthy of them. I know you feel hurt but this will pass with time. Get yourself out of the house and find someone who is worthy of what you have to offer him as a person and partner.
I am hearing that Mr. Cronkite died today, but I don't understand why it is all over the news absolutely everywhere? He is just a news reporter guy right? I feel bad for asking this, but I feel worse for not knowing. Yes I know he was a news anchor, but there are lots of those out there, so what makes Walter Cronkite so special? I don't even understand why Michael Jackson is such a big deal, and who ever even heard of Walter Cronkite until today?
Thnaks!
Walter Cronkite set the standard for what TV news is today. He was a champion of the space programs early days, and he also brought the 60 Minutes News Magazine Program to CBS. Many if not all TV news and magazine programs are fashioned by the standards set by Mr. Cronkite.
The first TV news programs were only 15 minutes long as the networks did not feel the news made any money for them. Mr. Cronkite with CBS backing was the first to go to a 30 minute format that other stations did not follow for almost 2 years. His news program lead the ratings until his retirement. I guess you could say he is considered the father of TV news programming.
I had the honor of meeting Mr. Cronkite in Person one evening when he traveled on the airline I was a gate agent with. He was as nice in person as he appeared on TV.
these girls say they are going to come kick my ass both of them dont know how to fight im not really worried about it but do you have any tips on fighting?
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
My advice on fighting is to walk away. Nothing is gained from fighting, in the end someone ends up hurt and someone ends up talking to the police. That scenario is the lucky outcome. Recently a 14 year old boy in Maryland was stalked by three boys who wanted to fight him. The reason for the fight has not been discovered. The 14 year old boy is dead and his three attackers are charged as adults, even though they are juveniles, with First Degree Murder and are awaiting trial.
Won’t happen, can’t happen in your case. That is exactly what the lawyers are saying for the three boys charged with murder. It was not their intent to kill the 14 year old boy. What happened was during the fight the boy fell against the curb and hit his head and died. One boy is dead and three other lives are ruined. Even if the lawyers are successful in getting the charges reduced to second degree murder or manslaughter these three boys are looking at many years in prison. For what to prove who is the toughest bully?
Am I trying to scare you? You bet I am, as well as enlighten you as to what the possible outcome of what a simple fight can turn into. I’ll give you another scenario: A man walks into a bar to meet his girlfriend. He sees another man chatting her up at the bar. The man walks over and pushes the other man off the bar stool. The man falls to the floor and hits his head on the foot railing and cuts his head open and is unconscious. He is taken to the hospital where doctors revive him and then inject pain killers around the cut so they can stitch him up. Unknown to the doctors the man is allergic to the pain killers and dies. Who killed him the doctors or the man that pushed him of the bar stool?
You would think it would be the doctor who gave him the pain killer, it is not. It is the man that pushed him off the bar stool, for if he had not pushed him, the man would not have fallen and ended up in the hospital where the doctor could treat him with the wrong medication.
With the Justice system treating children today more and more as adults, a simple little fight can turn out to be much more than that. My advice is to tell your parents what is going on with these two girls and let them handle it. If they feel it requires involving the police so be it. It is better that you be safe than you be sorry. If you do not understand what I have just said ask your parents what I mean.
sorry didn't know what catagory to put this under but ..
if the police ask for my statement about something that happened, it has nothing to do with me and i was not there. do i have to give it to them?
they just want to know what i know about the situation but i do not want to give them a statement. help please? thanks. :)
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
The short answer to your question is no you do not have to give a statement o the police if you do not want to. All statements to police must be given voluntarily without any coercion on the part of the police, even if under arrest.
If not under arrest you do not have the rights a criminal has; I speaking of the Miranda rights. If you are under a certain age, which does vary somewhat from state to state, you do have the right to have a parent or guardian with you when talking with the police. I would suggest that before you make any decision regarding giving a statement you talk with your parents. Ask your parents to go with you to the police station to speak with the officers wanting your statement. After your parents have discussed the situation with the police and decide you should give the police a statement then do so. If your parents decide you should not then do not give any statement and go home with your parents. Your parents will then decide if you need to speak with or retain a lawyer.
Since you have not said why the police want a statement from you that is the best advice I can give you. The police ask for statements from people for a number of reasons. Most of the time it is because you have witnessed a crime and your statement will help convict the perpetrator. Some of the other reasons range from being involved in an accident to witnessing one, someone you know is being investigated and is using you as an alibi witness and last but not least the person being asked for the statement is suspected of a crime.
If you are under age talk to your parents before you do anything else, they need to know about this and why the police are interested in a statement from you. Trust me on this, no matter what you decide as far as giving a statement, whatever this involves and your involvement if any will not remain hidden from your parents. It will be better if they hear about whatever this is from you.
my acne is sort of mild, and i wanted to know that if anyone who had pro-activ, if it is helpful? and should i buy it?
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
I did a little research before responding to you. As I suspected there are different types of acne and different treatments for each. While I am not a professional, common sense tells me that you must first identify the type of acne you have in order to treat it properly. Home remedies and over the counter remedies could do more harm than good.
Start by making an appointment to see your family doctor. Your doctor may want you to see a Dermatologist; this is a doctor who specializes in skin problems. Follow the treatment regiment given you by the doctor(s) as well as keeping all the follow up visits.
This is the best way to deal with this problem is you want keep from having scars as a result of using the wrong treatment. As with any request for medical treatment you may need to have parental consent. So speak with your parents and before making any appointments.
i got out of the hospital about a week ago, and now the pain is back, im coughing up blood a lot n it came out my eyes and my ass. its severeee pain and idk what to do anymore. we dont have enough money at all for me to go back into the er.. right now im on a medicine that coats my insides to tone down the pain. other than doctors what can i do? any websites or people on here?
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
Pick up the phone and call 911; you need to be seen by a doctor TODAY and right NOW. There are different programs that will take care of the medical bills if your parents cannot pay the bill and you are not covered by insurance. After you have been seen by the doctors ask to speak with the hospital social worker, they are the people knowledgeable in the programs that will benefit you.
These programs are not charity but programs specifically designed by the government to benefit children of parents that are uninsured. Do not delay pick up the phone and dial 911 and get to a hospital.
15/f
I dont know if anyone can answer this. I just dont understand why even though when I hang out with my friends I have a good time and laugh, but when I get home I still go into a depression. I start playing really sad songs and I try to cut myself and I just start bawling and freaking out.
My best friend, who I love more than anything in a friendship kind of way, just moved away about 3 weeks ago. Then the boy I was seeing decided to abruptly end our relationship for no good reason. Ever since then I've been feeling so lonely, like there's no one around I can talk to or relate to and I feel abandoned. Then I always feel guilty cause of done many things Im not proud of (drinking mostly) but its constant and i always feel like my dad can see me and is so disappointed in me (he died when I was three.) No matter how bad i feel though i cant stop drinking and no matter how sick it makes me feel.
I dont really know how this can be answered, but does anyone feel what Im going through? I just dont understand cause, really not to sound conceited, ive been told im very pretty and my mom makes a pretty good salary and when i think of how much worse some people have it i feel selfish for wanting to end my life sometimes but i cant help it i still feel like everything is just going so wrong.
Please help. Im sorry this is so long.
I find that I am a great deal older than most of the advisers on this site, so my advice will be somewhat different from what you have received and may continue to receive from others.
In your letter you speak of three issues; cutting, depression and suicide. I cannot tell you why you feel the way you do, depression is triggered by any number of factors. What I can tell you is that recognizing you are depressed is the key too healing. Drinking does not help depression as alcohol is a depressant and an issue that needs to be faced as well. Suicide is part of the depression you feel and when you feel this way you need to get help immediately.
There are two hotlines you can call for help; the first is the National Suicide Prevention hotline: 1-800-273-TALK (8255), the other is a crisis Hotline at Girls and Boys Town: 1-800-448-3000. Both hotlines work the same way. They are staffed by trained professionals who you can talk freely to as anything you say is kept totally confidential. They will also provide you with people in your own community that you can go to for help, in many cases going so far as setting up the first appointment for you.
You are never alone; help is never any further away than your phone. If you ever feel that you are so depressed that you are going to hurt yourself you can dial 911 for help. The call takers are trained to help you while getting help to you.
As for treatment for depression it starts with your family doctor and a full physical to rule at any physical cause, then a referral to a psychiatrist for evaluation and proper medication. No you are not crazy; your family doctor does not have the training to properly evaluate your depression. Once the type of depression is known the psychiatrist will recommend a psychologist for you to work with to get at the cause of the depression and find what triggers your depressive episodes.
Last, you did not mention if you have spoken to your mother about how you are feeling. This is something you really need to do. As parents are primary job is the safety and welfare of our children. When our children do not share with us what is bothering them then we fail at our most important job in life. This is when teenagers say they cannot talk with their parents because their parents holler and scream at them when they try to talk to them. We holler and scream because we see ourselves failing and we are scared, hurt and unsure what to do, so we do what we do best. So talk to you mom calmly, tell her how you are feeling. If you are calm, mom will be calm and together you can work this out and get the help you need.