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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.

The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.

advice

I have an interview at Pizza Hut on Saturday and I was wondering what I should wear? Should I wear jeans and a pretty blouse? I don't think shorts are appropriate but I think a dress will be to fancy.

Help! Thanks in advance!

Have you ever heard the expression; dress for success."


What this means is that you dress appropriate for what it is you want to accomplish. Yes, you will most likely be interviewed in the dining room where appropriate dress is anything as long as shoes and tops are worn. In this case though the dining room is also the managers primary office space and you need to dress accordingly regardless of the position you are applying for.


At one time appropriate business office suits or dresses was the only dress style to interview in. Today business casual is appropriate for the interview you are going on. Business casual for you would be a nice pair of slacks, blouse and appropriate foot wear, no flip flop or tennis shoes. A nice skirt of appropriate length and blouse would also be good. Fix you hair and minimal make up, lip gloss and eyeshadow if you use them.


Tips on interviewing: Sit upright, don't slouch. After you are asked a question take a second or two to formulate your answer. Look the interviewer in the eye when answering. When meeting the interviewer make eye contact, shake there hand and introduce yourself. Example, Hi I'm Jane Doe I'm glad to meet you. Don't fidget or play with you hands. Turn your cell phone off before you arrive.


One important question you may be asked that you could think about now. Pizza Hut is a National corporation that even though it is made up of Franchised locations they do have a corporate management program. When hiring help, even part-time help managers are on the look out for people that may be candidates for the Pizza Hut management program. The question that is asked will have something to do with what future do you see for yourself with Pizza Hut?

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I met a guy at work and the first day I met him he started teasing me in a playful way making laugh. I found it kinda weird someone who didn't know me that well but felt so comfortable teasing me right away. He said he likes teasing me but he don't know why. Now whenever we see each other he bothers me and does stuff to make me laugh. He puts his headphones in my ears and plays songs for me on his ipod and sings funny and dances funny to make me laugh. One time he saw me talk to another guy and pretended to act like he was jealous and kept interrupting the conversation. The other guy looked at him like he was crazy. I never met someone who that got so comfortable around me so fast before. I think he likes me but he hasn't said anything. What could it be?

I think we need more people like him in this world. If there were more people like him the world would be a happier place and maybe we would have less fights.


Admittedly he is a little strange when viewed against the rest of us. For some reason he took an immediate liking to you. Fact is good natured teasing is only done to people we like. Good natured teasing takes a lot more work than hateful or hurtful teasing so he would not put the effort in if he didn't like you.


As to saying he likes you; he may be covering up his shyness with his teasing. That or he is looking for some type of sign from you that you like him. If you like him and want to get to know him better why not make the first move yourself and ask him out for drinks, if your old enough, or coffee after work one night.

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I've been feeling sad lately. I just feel that my whole bloodline is against me. I have cousins whom I used to be so close to and now I feel they are ignoring me. It's been depressing because this happened after I came back from a foreign country for 1 year. I did drop out of college there because of issues but I don't know if they are judging me because of that. How do I deal with this??? I can't even go to parties, go to their house because they just make me feel like a stranger rather than a family member.

I don't think what ever happened at school has anything to do with what you are feeling. Someone once wrote: "you can never go home again". This statement better fits what you are seeing and feeling.


Life went on while you were away. You changed, you experienced a different type of life. Now you are home and want to pick up where you left off. Things just don't happen that way.


As I said life went on while you were at school. They have had experiences that you were not apart off. They are not sure how to communicate with you now that you have seen a different and larger part of the world than they have. They have to get use to having you back in their lives.


For your part: going home again is going to be hard. Military people experience this, even those that never see war, for the reasons I have just stated. They matures simply because they saw a different life from the town they grew up in. Their friends and younger relatives stayed home, so they remained mostly as they left them.


Even the street you grew up on has changed. It is not the street you left behind. These are the things that are normal to friends and relatives but are strange to you. If you talk at all about these changes your friends and family do not see it because they lived through the changes.


This is what I believe is meant by; "You can never go home again." So relax, things will get back to what you think is normal, just give it time.

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are vaginas supposed to look wrinkly ?

Quick answer: yes.


If you have HBO look in their on demand section for a documentary on the subject of love making. It may be in the adult section. I watched this program once and in the beginning of the program they showed some illustrations that showed 5 different types of vagina's and how thy look. Unless there is a problem you haven't written about you are normal. If you do have some problem talk to your mom or see a doctor.

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My name is Alicia. I'm currently homeless/on the street. I wound up in Jackson, Mississippi which is a very small town.

I have health problems that prevent me from doing much of anything. I'm on Disability, and I'm expecting to get my check on the 3rd of the month in about 1 week.

What I'm having a hard time with is that I'm trying to decide what to do with the money I'm getting. I would like to leave here - I'm originally from California and don't really like it here or belong here.

But that's the hard part. Because of my health, I'm really not well enough to go anywhere and I can't seem to think about anything just yet. I have PTSD - where I have flashbacks of everything.

It seems like when I try to think of what to do when I get paid - all I do is put it down and say well I can't do that because of this, etc. I seem to ruin every positive thought I try to have. I can't seem to take a step forward because of these flashbacks I have.

The problem is I'm on the street here and want to move forward with my life and I'm getting really impatient with that happening.

Just to cut it in the quick ahead of time, no I don't take medication and please don't tell me to get help - I've tried and nothing helps me.

Is there any advice you can give me about what I should do? Should I stay here for a while until I feel bettter or should I leave when I get my check? Can you tell me anything positive that might lift me up? Please don't tell me about shelters - please.

I look forward to hearing from you soon. Thank you.

I would like to know more about what is causing your PTSD so I can offer better advice. For example are you ex. Military. If so I think I can understand your comment on having tried getting help for it. PTSD is treatable, unfortunately the military and the VA are underfunded and treatment is varies from facility to facility.

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My husband and I did just fine until we said "I do" and then he became a control freak. He has been married 4 times including me and has abused all of them, even me. I didn't know about the abuse until I did some home work and saw the Div. Decrees. He has got the idea of taking sex away he can ontrol. I guess he can. I just want to know what kind of personality disorder this is?

Three failed marriages should have been a red flag. Someone who is a controller has a personality disorder. Personality disorders are not something that can be fixed with medication or even therapy.


While therapy will work it requires the total cooperation of the patient. While I applaud your desire to help your husband overcome his problem, he has to want to change, you cannot force him to change. From his perspective he sees nothing wrong. To him you and everyone else have a problem not him. This is coming from someone who had a control problem at one time. Mine was not like your husbands. Mine was more like controlling everything in my life. Everything had to be in its proper place in order for me to function. I changed, it was hard work and I work hard at it every day and I slip once in a while.


Getting your husband to change is going to be hard on you too. Working with him when and if he agrees he has a problem even harder. If you cannot or do not see him agreeing to the fact that he has a problem and willing to work to correct it; then the only advice I can offer is: Find a good divorce lawyer before your self esteem is so damaged that you need therapy.

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okay I talked to this lasy who was a labor and delivery tech and she said it only takes 8 weeks because you only set up & stuff like that fot the labor and delivery nurses. where do you take those classes at? by the way I live in the lake county area of illinois. thanks in advance

As the following linked article states the requirements differ from employer to employer, mostly depending on the size of the unit.


There are various technical schools that offer the training you are looking for. The linked article lists 5 of them. I'm not sure which or if any of them have a program near you. Contact one or all of them. IF they do not have a program near you they should be able to refer you to a school that does. You can also contact your local community College to see if the office an extension program for this course.


http://diplomaguide.com/articles/Obgyn_Technician_Career_Info.html

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I am a 15 1/2 year old girl. I am thinking about going out with this guy, he's 20. We really like each other. If we did end up going out, how far would we be able to go?

Let me count the ways this is wrong:


First: This is a one way ticket to prison for him. Even if this is a platonic relationship, no sex. He can be charged with statutory rape. This is a Felony charge and he will have to register as a sex offender for the rest of his life. Should you for some reason cross a state line he can be charged with the federal crime of violating the Mann act, more prison time.


Second: IF you were 20 and he 25, I would say go for it. But a 20 year old dating a 15 year old is not good. It is actually quite dangerous as the 20 year old could be a child predator. You have to take that into consideration these days.


Third: Depending on the laws in your state you could be charged with juvenile crimes. While these crimes are not suppose to follow you into adulthood you better hope you never need a security clearance for any job you apply for.


These are just three of the real life facts of having a relationship with this man, platonic or otherwise. There is something wrong with him if he knows your 15 and wants to date you. He should be dating people his own age.

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I have posted a question like this before, and in hopes of my situation getting better, I stopped posting. However, it has not gotten better.

my mother treats me like shit. She calls me selfish and evil. She always wants me to be popular and get more active when I prefer to be quiet and by myself. She always brings me down. She tells me how much I remind her of my father because I am such a "selfish heartless ungrateful ass" and she always complains how I don't get anything done in life. I'm only sixteen and she has brought me down ever since I turned fourteen. She always tells me how stupid and slow I am when I don't do certain things right. I am very forgetful and she calls me retarded. When I tell her she makes me feel so horrible about myself she laughs and denies it and makes excuses. She even threatens to knock out my teeth and hit me and make me bloody. I feel horrible and depressed and nothing ever changes when she wants to talk about it. She hits my one year old baby brother for crying when he doesn't want to sleep and makes me baby sit him on school nights. She gets pissed when he cries for me and complains that I am nothing but a selfish bitch. I need help! Please.

I would suggest you talk to a trusted teacher or school guidance counselor. If your school has already been dismissed for the year you can still talk with your school principal who will be in school for most of the summer break. They will know what to do and have been trained to handle such matters.


What your mother is doing is called child abuse. Her threatening to punch your teeth out is called assault. Assault is when someone threatens you who has the means and the ability to do so and you are in fear for your life or from bodily harm. When mom threatens you in this matter or should she ever strike you in such a manner, regardless of whether she damages your teeth, you can call the police, child welfare or both.


You have not said were dad is. Does he live with you? Is he supportive of how mom is treating you? If dad is not living with you, have you told him? A little sidewalk psychology here; since this behavior from mom is somewhat new, being in the last two years, mom could be taking out her anger with dad on you. Just a guess on my part and still wrong of her to do so.


Please contact a trusted adult and ask for help. It is the best thing you can do for you and your brother. Your mom needs help. Something has happened within the last two years that has made her this way. By calling child welfare or the police or talking to a teacher or your principal mom will get the help she needs.


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When I was younger I had a relationship with a girl. It was forbided by my mother so we had to sneak around. anyway For years I have dated men because of that. People have questioned me even my own children and I have denied it only because I didn't want to break my moms heart. My mom passed away a little over a year ago and I feel as if it is now okay to tell people and I just dont know how for fear that they will be mad because I out and out lied for so many year. How do I let them know now.

I'm not quite sure what your asking in your question. What is it that you want to tell people? Is it that you want to tell people that when you were a girl you had a lesbian relationship or is it that you are a lesbian and have been living a lie all these years.


Lets take the first part of my question first: We receive a number of question from young women who think they are either bi or lesbian because they feel attracted to another girl. Most of these girls are young under 16 in general.


When I answer then I tell them that I would not want to put a label on them at this time as I feel it would be wrong to do so at this time. My reason, most young people at their age are exploring their sexuality; both boys and girls. I go on to tell them that I have known women whose primary sexual outlet was bi or lesbian all through college then went straight heterosexual. Why were they this way? Simple, lesbian sex was safer and easier to find in school. If this sounds more like you then I see no reason to announce to the world you had a lesbian relationship.

If all you want to do is tell people you once had a lesbian affair when you were a teenager. My thoughts are that is something that is not required of you. As I said most all teenagers, boys and girls, do experiment with same sex, sexuality during the early stages of puberty. To my mind your mother over reacted.


If it is something else then write back to me and I will do my best to help you.


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I would like some advice on how to support my family members with the loss of both our mom and sister. My mom passed away on 4/7/2011 from cancer and my younger sister was by her bedside for six month taking care of her. Only leaving her side for about an hour a day. We had services for our mom and after a couple of weeks my sister went to Florida to get away and visit some friends on the day she was do to return (5/8/2011) she was shot and killed. Our family had yet to start the grieving process for our mom when this occurred and now we face this. As of yet there are no leads of who or why this was done and has left a lot of unanswered questions for our family. I am asking for suggestion on how to support my family in this terrible time because right now it seems like everyone is going there own ways.

First my condolences on your losses.


It is said that there are seven stages of grief. They are; shock, denial, anger, guilt, pain and sorrow,release and resolution and return to love. You will each go through the first five if not all seven. You will do so in your own way and your own time. Family grief counseling would probably help with the tragic loss of your sister and reconciling the loss of two loved family members so close together.


In a way your desire to be there for your family is your way of coping with the loss of your sister and mother. The best way to help each other is just to be there for each other. To let the other vent when needed. To give a hug when needed or a shoulder to cry on.


The say time heels all wounds; this is true. The hurt will pass, your love for them will never leave you. They will always be with you every hour of every day in you mind and that is where you draw your comfort from. Be strong for your family; but allow yourself time to grieve as well.

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Me and the guy I have been fooling around with have talked about having sex in a canoe. Has anyone tried this? Like what would be the best way to go about it? And please don't say don't do it because we still will, whether we succeed or not lol.

I hope your very good swimmers and still make sure to wear a life jacket. Canoes are easily upset. I really don't think it is possible nor do I recommend having sex in a canoe.


A rowboat is more stable in the water and I still don't recommend it for you can over turn a rowboat if you are not paying attention. Whatever you decide make sure to wear a coast guard certified life jacket.

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Whenever I come on here to give out advice, I see questions that are so ridiculous..

- where can i get a dress?... ummm the mall??????
- am i pregnant?.... get a pregnancy test and find out yourself???
- how do i tell him i love him?- ........ just say you love him????
- do i have a yeast infection??..... how should we know? google it.

honestly. Is it just me, or is anyone else kinda frustrated that people are posting the most obvious and ridiculous questions ever???

There is an old saying; "You can't see the forest for the trees". What this means is your to engrossed in the problem to see the answer even though you should know the answer. So when these young people are staring at the forest and can't see the trees they sit down at the computer and write to us; just as you are now.


As DangerNerd said; some are just to young to know the answers or to know where to look for the answers. Some just want an independent look at their problem(s).


We get to pick and choose the questions we wish to answer. If we feel we can help we answer. If not we pass on the question. The questions that bother me are not the ones you mention but the ones that ask about suicide. I often wonder if we helped prevent a suicide. Those people rarely if ever write back to us.


I would say it is all in how you look at things.

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For several months now, I have noticed that the skin on my nipples is kinda peeled off, if that makes sense- it is reddish, while the rest of the area is brownish. It is not painful at all. I asked my sister about it before, and she said to make sure to moisturize the area after taking a shower, which I never do, but probably should. My mom also told me to make sure I wash my bras regularly in a mild detergent.

But that said, I still wonder why the skin around my nipples (just the center) is not there... I know this might sound gross, but why would this happen? And what can/should I do about it?

None of us on this website are doctors. While the answer your mom, sister and the two other advisers makes good sense, it is not a medical determination. Your nipples are an important part of breast feeding your future children. While what is happening may be normal and easily correctable with the advise offered I would suggest either asking your gynecologist or a dermatologist, just to be on the safe side.


If you have health insurance I am sure this is the type of office visit that would be covered. The information you have received is all probably good information. My concern is with all the different skin ailments floating around out there why not be safe and let a doctor look at you.

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Iam 22 years old and my brother in law is 36 years old and I went to this party on graduation weekend and everybody got drunk and I was drunk and he tried to kiss me and I told him no and he still kept trying to kiss me. my sister and my brother in law are seprerated but they are still legally married and he has another girlfriend and now my mom and my sister won't let him see my niece and i feel like it's all my fault what should I do?

If you did not encourage your brother in-law then you did nothing wrong. He was drunk, when you drink your inhibitions are reduced. He probably having lost his inhibitions decided to make a pass at you after harboring feelings for you. Again, not your fault.


You need to put this in the proper prospective for you mother and sister as to who's fault it is and who to punish. You are being punished for something you tried and succeeded at avoiding.

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Hi

I've been going out with this girl for a while now, 8 months+ , and things are great, she's 16 and I'm 17, though I just like to know if its wrong to want to go further, we kiss but that's about it, I feel like perhaps its wrong to just ask her to go further or even like feel her up coz she's 16 and dnt wana be forcing things on her..I'm just not sure.

Thanks for the help :)

Your doing the right thing. she will let you know when she is ready to go further. Actually you will both know when the time is right.


It is never right for anyone to force someone else to do something before they are ready. You are showing a lot of maturity and respect which will be in your best interest as you go through life. You will do well to learn how these skills will help you in all aspects of your life in the future, not just in your love life,

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It's raining and thundering and lightning at our house and my girlfriend is terrified of thunder and lightning. She scared she can't stop shaking and she's crying she keeps saying she's scared. What can I do to help her ?

The best thing you can do for her is to try and keep her calm. Hold her and comfort her. Try and get her to the quietest part of the house, which is usually the basement if you have one.


Having a healthy fear of thunderstorms is a good thing. I don't want to belittle her fear but her fear is not healthy if it totally paralyzed her. Encourage her to seek counseling to learn to deal with this fear.

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I am belimic and nobody absolutly nobody knows but the other day i was wearing a tight shirt and my aunt goes " oh my goodness sweetheart you have lost so much weight. You are eating right?" i anwsered yes because i am. She said it when it was only memand her and my mom doesnt notice anything. And i want to get help but i have no idea how to tell anybody. Even for people to try to see when i am at my house i always lift up my shirt and rub my ribs so people might see how skinny i have gotten. So please somebody help me tell my mom and i need you to say it clear and gentle because my mom doesnt take new things well. So please my life is on the line right now. Please

I think you know what you are doing is wrong and have taken the first step to correcting this problem by asking for help.


If you are having trouble talking to your mother, as most teenagers do, then their are other people you can turn to for help. A trusted teacher at school, your school nurse or guidance counselor are some of the people at school you can turn to at school.


You mentioned your Aunt noticed your weight loss, could you not speak comfortably to her, even if it had to be over the phone or even by email. I'm sure by what she said she is interested in your well being and would help you tell your mother even if it meant making a special trip to your house to do so.


Lastly, if your over 13 you do not need parental permission to see a doctor. You could and should make an appointment to see you family doctor as soon as possible. Tell the doctor what you have been doing so you can be examined to see if you have done any damage to yourself. Then with your permission the doctor can inform your mother. Being the family doctor he/she would be familiar enough with her to know just how to inform her without totally upsetting her.


Most importantly though is if you are purging you could be doing serious harm to your esophagus. The acids in your stomach are not meant to come up your throat and you could be doing serious harm to the lining of your esophagus. So please see your doctor ASAP.

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Hello I am a 16 year old male and I recently applied to a McDonalds near where I live. The application made me really sad at the sort of questions they asked and I just feel like there is a much better way I could be spending my time that mindlessly working at McDonalds. My parents want me to get a summer job but I do not really want to work here. Am I being too picky or snobbish. I get straight As and I don't know it just seems like a waste of my time. Writing this now it seems elitist but it is how I feel. Any advice on this matter would help. Be critical of me too it will only help me.

Do you know how many people who started at McDonald's at your age in a position that you now have are now owner/operators of McDonald's Franchises. I'm not talking of people who started back in the 50's, I'm talking of people who just 5 or 10 years ago started working for McDonald's. Many of these people are now millionaires. Not all maybe but those that are not are quite financially comfortable.


Stop being an elitist/snob and get your head out of the sand. McDonald's, if your interested, offers one of the best management training programs of the corporate kingdom. You can learn a lot while working for them. Should you decide to stay and climb the corporate ladder or try the world outside of McDonald's you will have trained with the best. You just are not seeing it. All you are see is being asked to ask can I suppersize your order.


Sure working the front counter is not a job for a straight A student and it is not the most challenging position. In every job their is an entry level position where management evaluates your potential. If you look at this position as being below you, well then you will never climb above it. If you grab on to this position and make it yours, then you could become an assistant manager. Yes, even as summer part-time help.


When you go on to college and need some money, walk into any McDonald's and give this franchise as a reference and you have a job; one the owner will most likely be happy to work around your school schedule. Why? Good part-time help is hard to find. Good part-time help with management experience is even harder to find.


When you move away from the front counter you may find the job more challenging and more interesting. If you stay with McDonald's and chosen for their young executive program, I believe they still offer something like that, they offer a tuition assistance program.


As they saying goes you have judged a book by its cover. Take a better look at the pages under the cover and see what opportunities McDonald's may hold.


No, I have never worked for nor do I own stock in McDonald's.

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Hi. i have a friend who's gay and in our circle of friends, he's particularly close with me. however lately i noticed that he loves hugging too much and i'm quite uncomfortable with it. i enjoy hugs but this friend of mine hugs on an extreme level, like once he hugs me it's hard to get away from him. and he clings around me a lot. so now i'm keeping a cold distance away from him and i am aware that he notices it because he no longer hugs me. but i feel quite sad, i don't want him to misunderstand that i hate him or anything. should i tell him or not? will it clear up the tension?

So your friend is gay and likes to hug. Your uncomfortable with the hugging or that he is gay? If he was straight and hugged just as much as he does would you still be uncomfortable?


I ask this question for if it is just hugging, regardless of his sexuality it is easy to fix. But if it is his sexuality that is the problem that is harder to fix and still maintain his friendship.


Their are two trains of thought when it comes to homosexuality. Some believe it is a matter of choice. While others believe that this is the way they were born to be. I happen to believe that people are born the way they are and it is not a life style they choose.


What you first need to do is figure out what bothers you; his lifestyle or his hugging. If he has never made a pass at you and he knows you are not interested in him sexually I doubt he would ever make a pass at you. Their are many men and women who are straight that are, as I call them hugger's. They are just very loving warm people. Cannot a gay person be a warm loving person without any sexual undertones?


The reason I have written what I have is that the solution to the problem is simple. It is the question that comes afterward that requires the thinking I have asked you to do. The solution is to simply ask your friend to not hug you. Simply tell him your not a touchy feely type guy and would he mind not hugging as much as he does.


He is going to ask if this is because if he is gay. That is why you need to know the answer for yourself before you ask him to back off.

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