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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!

advice

Hi, we have been dating for 2 and a half years and we live together. he is a reserved and quiet person. what does he mean when he says,''he doesn't want to split up but he also don't to live like this,'' that means arguing most of the days. thanks guys!

Were there things that aggravated one or both of you about the other back when you first began dating? Or were you feeling so in love you were blind to it? Unless some major event in life happened to one or the other of you that made a life altering difference in you, then I'd say both of you are exactly the people you were then.

If the early dating was not a living together arrangement, then this may account for not seeing in each other things that show you aren't the best match for a couple. Once you start living with a person you see things you'd never notice otherwise.

Good example, hubby and I thought we knew our old apartment manager really well, a friendly person. She bought a mobile home and wanted renters to share the cost but only people she knew so she offered us better than what we were paying. We moved in. In 2 weeks times we'd had dozens of incidents that showed she was well into having Dementia and she was upset with us being there and had to move out in a hurry. It was not noticeable by two people before hand.
So its not a bad thing that you decided to commit to living together...its the best way to really find out what the other is like and whether you'll have the dream relationship or clash.
Only you can know if there is something worth saving in this relationship or whether its time to move on. He may not want to split only for the reason that no matter how old we get, its freakin scary to go through the whole meet and find out if they like you and start dating process all over again. So don't look at that as an indicator that he's really into you and loves you

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I'm an 18 year old girl and I've been dating my boyfriend who's 19 for a year now. We've been best friends for years. He moved away a bit over a year ago and moved back to be with me. Everything's been going great until recently. He still tells me he loves me and we're getting engaged soon, but recently all he's been doing is playing video games almost non-stop. I try to talk to him saying I want to spend more time with him; he says he's sorry and promises we'll do more together but it doesn't change. Even when we go out with friends, it's typically to his friends' place to play more games. What should I do? Does he not love me as much anymore? Am I doing something wrong? I try to see even if he'll let me play games with him but he plays with his friends instead. I don't know if I'm over-reacting but it's bothering me and wish he'd put a little more effort into spending time with just us. Any advice would be great!

So if I understand correctly, as younger kids, you knew each other. You only starting dating at the time he left over a year ago. So your entire dating relationship has been on line. Before he left, was he as actively addicted to video games? You should have known then. But of course he was younger too.
Perhaps you hoped he had matured in the 14, 15 mos since you last saw him. If he was paying you attention, what would it look like? Is it something that would help you really get to know each other even better? Or would it be the equivalent of what he is doing now. The two of you in the same room but not interacting together in conversation. You are still of an age where serious relationships that last long term are not yet the norm because this is still the time to be dating to learn about the opposite sex, how they work...how to relate to them, what you do and don't like about how he treats you, habits you can't live with...etc. So you invested a year so far. Make a list of what you liked, what you didn't like...video game addiction, breaking promises, and I am sure there's more if you would only look. Write it down because you don't want to forget. Since he's been a life friend, I'd say be willing to keep in touch but let him know you will be looking for someone else to date. You ask if he doesn't love you as much now. I married at 20. I had lots to learn yet about love. What I thought was the kind of love that would make the difference in having a healthy happy marriage was not it at all. And I stayed with him 30 yrs because of 3 daughters.
So do not commit to one guy just because of history together or because at some point he has voiced the words, 'I love you"
Find a man who knows how to treat you well, there is balance in the relationship, each person putting equal effort into each other and the relationship, he is a person of integrity, meaning, the values he believes in and stands for, are very noticeable because he lives them out every day in the relationship, he's a man of his word. Once you see a man continuously take himself out of integrity, you have a decision to make. For you can not change anyone but yourself. Changing yourself is not good enough for a relationship if the other isn't making steps to change. Many will never make any change in their life time or only baby steps that have no impact on the health of a relationship. So the guy who stands before you as he is today is almost exactly who he will be when you've been together 5-10 years and have kids as well. There is also a difference between love and being in love with another. In my new relationship He is In Love with me. It means hubby says his world is more full of joy just because i am in it, he even prefers to do everything like dishes, or shopping cus the mundane stuff is now fun because of who is at his side. When we are apart like for work, he can hardly wait to be back together. He is always supportive, attentive, fixing meals, cleaning up and tells me to relax, he'll do the chores this time. He adores and worships me with his words and shows me in bed how much he loves me by making sure i am satisfied before himself.
That's what being "in love" is all about dear.

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For a while now, I've liked my guy friend as more than a friend, but I'm not sure he likes me back.
He always reads my blog when no one else does, and he talks to me when I sit next to him in lessons. When I sit next to him, he acts comical and does things like take my ruler or swap out pens.
He sometimes leans on me when he's talking to the boy sitting the other side of me, and our elbows will often be touching for minutes at a time (with neither of us moving them).
I sometimes see him looking at me, and when he talks to me when we sit opposite each other, he often looks at me in the eyes.
We like the same things, so he often messages me links about them,, or puts funny things.

What do you think? What should I do to subtly tell him I like him as more than a friend, if I should?

Thanks :)

Is this his normal nature? Is he this friendly with others? I am guessing probably not. He is showing you that he likes you in subtle enough ways to not scare you off. He may be afraid to ask if you will be his girl for fear you may reject him. Sometimes, a girl just has to take the first step. Scary isn't it? LOL I know of a young lady on youtube who in one of her video's suggests simply writing a note that says 'Do you like me a lot?' and put two boxes for checking off, one for yes, one for no. You draw a simple heart and smiley face on it. fold it up and slyly hand it to him one day in class. I am sure he will answer and return it. Once he has confirmed with a yes, you should feel free to have conversation about whatever you like, if you haven't yet, then trade phone numbers maybe write and share stuff on facebook. If he hasn't yet, see if its okay for him to come hang out at your house. I am sure you can figure out what to do from this point.

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Okay i am 13 years old and i got my period at 10. At first my period would go off then go regularly. But now its flowing okay. But now on this week it supposed to come on. I dont know if its going to come on this week. But i do masturbate time to time. But i know i Cant get pregnant from that. So is this normal. Or should i worry. Please give me your advice.

You will eventually get over the fear of blood that flows. Using fingers or even dildo or vibrator can be used at any time, whether having your period flow or not. Older couples who've been together a while, find it great to have sex while she is flowing. It's messy but it is one of the best lubricants. And once you start the sexual activity, the flow will actually hold off for a while, like the hour that you are making out and as soon as you finish, it starts up again. Always wash yourselves well in a shower after, and the same for sex toys, always wash well. There is no limit to how much is okay to masturbate so you can do it as often as you like. As long as it doesn't interfere with your regular life and school, no problem. I would like to recommend to you a site that is especially geared for young teens through college age, its on youtube. The name is Sex Plus by Laci Green. Her videos are all in the 3-4 min range, packed with very helpful info. She knows what she is talking about and she's funny, college age herself. Topics range from dating, relationships, learning about your body parts and how they work, sexual topics, gender types,rape, abuse, everything. She's on FB but there's way more info on her youtube site. If there aren't many videos showing, click on the number of videos next to her name. Tell your friends about her site. Its very important. Even at grandma age, I find her reviews of new products helpful info that I can pass on to others.

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I'm 13 and in the U.S. I have been liking this one boy for almost a year. And everyone keeps telling me that I am too young for a boyfriend. What age is too young??? And how do I avoid the comments like you're to young???

Are your friends saying you are too young? I can;t imagine that. It's probably just the parents saying you're too young. While some kids have parents who either don't care or are more hip, and can get away with it at your age...if the parents are the issue, here's what option you have.

Talk to the parents again. Tell them that they had no problem with you picking out who your girlfriends were, did they? Where do you and girlfriends hang out most the time, probably at each others house or some public place. Tell them you have found a guy you would like to have for a friend. Just don't use the term boyfriend because it makes them think of private dates. Ask if he can come hang out at the house just like your girlfriends do. I did not want my girls on single dates out alone with a guy so I told them if they found a guy they liked enough, to invite him to hang out at our house. I think 13 is a perfect time. At some point you need to learn to be able to spot the things you like and don't like in a guy. What are the warning signs of a not so nice guy? A very high percent of dating girls experience verbal or physical abuse from their boyfriends. So tell the parents they have the opportunity this way to oversee your friendship with someone of the opposite sex and give you input and teach you some things all under their parental guidance. If they agree to this, Hurray!

Make sure the guy you have chosen is a friendly well balanced sort. Is he confident enough to talk to your parents, being friendly with and take an actual interest in them...not pretense so he can be with you. Most people can tell when someone is being false. In time, he will grow on them and they will know if he really cares about you and treats you well.

At 13, many who are "Dating" really only see each other at school, or also at each others houses. I'd say, restrain yourself from kissing where they could see and have a panic attack. If the guy is perfectly happy with this arrangement, in two years the parents may be willing to review their ideas of single dates and give the okay. If they don't allow you to do this, you will have to decide if you're okay with waiting longer or do whatever you feel is reasonable at that time. If anywhere along the way you and he feel you are ready for sex and really want to, then you do not need parents knowledge or approval. You can go to Planned Parenthood in private and get the contraceptives you need. Don;t fool around with out it. Good luck to you.

By the way, none of my 3 daughters could find a guy brave enough to hang out at our house with them.. So they didnt date until they got out of high school because they didn't like the drama of it and how it distracted the other dating girls from getting good grades. I have awesome daughters.

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15/f this guy 17/m we have been talking for like two months now he goes to my school. we talk all the time and its not awkward or anything we are really good friends and we talk about anything and everything. he'll usually always text me first and he'll say he thinks im a cool person and a cool person to talk to, im attractive, im really down to earth, nice and everything. and the other day we were talking about how when we both at a party I was drunk and that was the first we were talking really and he wasn't drinking and I wanted to hook up (make out) with him just because it was a spontaneous thing but he was like I cant im talking to this girl they had like a thing or whatever but now that's over I was telling him how that night I didn't like him and he was like was it because I didn't hook up with you and I said I think that had something to do with it and he said did you want to hook up and I said yeah I think so and then he asked if I still wanted to and I said yeah I would. and by this point he had been asking me to hangout for a while so I said oh this is why you wanna hangout and he said no if I just wanted to hook up with you I would've just asked and never talked to you again I actually really wanna hangout with you because I like talking to you. so I am so confused if hes just "beating around the bush" with I like this about and I like that about you, he wont come out and say I like you but I have no idea. I asked my friend whos in his grade if hes really talking to anyone and she said no hes not. his best friend that im friends with told me he was talking about me saying that he thinks im a cool girl and about the hook up thing and how hes not really looking for a relationship. but I don't even know if I am either I just want to know how he feels about me only because If I hook up with another guy I don't want him to think like he doesn't mean anything to me or whatever so im just confused

Our teens and young adult years are the time to date many different people...not all at the same time. You are not shooting for a long term relationship at this point, just learning what you like and don't like about guys and you will need to experience several relationships to learn. It's not often that teens who meet in high-school end up being sweethearts who marry. Part of the learning experience involves sex, and who you have some or a lot of chemistry with. What your guy most likely is saying is he really likes you as a person, and he prefers to have sex with someone he hits it off with as a friend. This would be called, A friend with benefits. Guys find it easier to engage in sex before falling in love, while girls like to have some feeling for the guy before she does. He just is not trying to give false hope that he is looking for a girl to marry some day at this point...he is being realistic here. Since he sounds like a wonderful guy, I see no reason for you to not hook up with him. But I highly recommend you go to planned parenthood for contraceptives first because some you need to be on for a while before they are effective. If at any point he or you find you no longer have an interest in each other and have met someone else, then nicely let them know you are going to date someone else now for a while cus you are still trying to learn about relationships and what you like in a guy. If at any point he takes himself out of integrity, not being honest with you, attempting to date others when he said he'd only commit to you for now, never stay with a guy who can not keep his word or doesnt treat a lady right, no matter how much your heart still feels an attachment of love inside. Good luck dear.

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Me and this guy have been talking for a few weeks now and I finally agreed to hangout with him last night, so we went out to the movies together and then watched Netflix at my house for about an hour; hes pretty shy so he didn't put his arm around me until after awhile and then I noticed his hand kept inching towards mine, so I just grabbed his hand and held it cuz I'm assuming he was too shy to do so. He was like rubbing my arm and my hand that he was holding and resting his head on mine. It was cute and all, but considering it was our first time hanging out I don't want him to get obsessed or anything...his heart was beating really hard when I hugged him goodbye and he kinda reached for my hand as he walked away. Either way he's leaving for the army in 2 weeks so there's nothing him or I can do but I don't want to hurt him and I wanted to make sure I hadn't done that already.

Watching movies and watching TV on a date doesnt allow for much interacting and building of a friendship. So other than your grabbing his hand, there is nothing there to indicate an established relationship. You and I have no idea what may be going on in his mind.. like if he thinks you have interest. As shy as he is, he might stretch reality in his mind to think there is something where there isn't.
I think you have a soft hearted, nurturing side to you. This may attract the shy, low self image type of man, or those who want to be mothered and remain children in an adult body. No real woman is going to enjoy any of those types of guys. Think hard about this, is what i mentioned what you were really doing, or are you actually attracted to him and want a relationship? A long distance relationship is very hard on well established relationships and more so for ones who barely got off the ground. If he never asks if you are interested, you don't need to say anything. But if it's weighing on your mind, you might want to call and talk to him about that night. You were just being friendly but have no romantic feelings if that is the case. Good Luck

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I went to the beach recently and returned home burnt pretty bad even with sunblock. So, a few days later, even though I've used lotion, my face began to peel. Now it's didn't skin tones and blotchy, and it looks hideous. Will the sun even it out, or what can I do to fix it?

I know how it feels to have blotchy looking skin in summer. I have so many freckles that come out with the sun in summer. Otherwise not noticeable. But in summer, so many that they appear as darker blothes over my face and there's not a thing I can do about it. Sigh. I have no idea if it will tan fast enough to look even. In meanwhile, I would say to try using a liquid foundation on the now paler areas in the shade of your tan areas on face. I would advice on not using the instant tan lotion. I do not know of a single person who used it who did not get orange tinted skin. And that would be worse.

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I'm 13. I have this weird way of thinking about guys. I think about their shoe size and then my mind wanders to the penis. I stop myself a lot. But then I think when is the right time to lose my virginity to one of those penises???? O_o

I would say the right time is when you have found someone that loves you as much as you love him. This can happen at any age. 13/14, 17/18, 21,22.
There is no rush to have sex. I have no idea why teens these days feel they have to do it. Personally, I have experienced having sex with guys just for the sake of having sex. Not at your age but as an adult. No matter when you have sex for this reason, it only takes care of your urge at the time and your heart feels empty, bankrupt afterwards. Because you see, your heart is looking to get something out of the transaction too. It wants to receive love, which it can't if the sex is just to take care of lust.
A vibrator or self masturbation can take care of the horniness. It sounds like you either have a healthy curiosity or maybe a wild libido. If you find someone you want to have sex with...plan it out cus you'll want to go visit PLanned parenthood first for birth control. If you don't think you can remember to take it regularly, then get the shot that is good for 3 mos but you still have to keep those appts and not run behind by a few days or you risk getting pregnant

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My boyfriend and I have been together for two years he has cheated on me last year, since then our affection has went out the door only time we are closed is when we have sex or if we are in bed sleeping other then that no hugs kisses or anything.... my niece recently started staying with us getting on my computer alot while we are at work so my put a parental software on it make sure she is nothing doing anything wrong but turns out that my boyfriend watches porn from the second I walk out the door even if I have sex or get him off before I leave for work and not only that the time stamps say he watches it at his lunch break and when he gets off 30mins before I get home? To top things off my niece has told me that he makes sounds during this time and she said she hears the water running right after it as he cleans up his mess... I knew he looked at it but when I seen just how much and to know he pleasure's himself three times a day and still ask for me just to pleasure him most the time is a little much since I found out about a week ago I have been disgusted because I feel either I am not doing something to keep him happy or he is not interested in me... I am not a big girl I am tall skinny long blk hair but he looks at girls with big Burt's or thick girls... or mostly blk girls (I'm white he's a light skinned blk man) idk what to do I love him so much but this is bothering me alot

He may be addicted to sex. Aside from that, even if he wasn't he still doesnt sound like a choice guy for a relationship. I'd be concerned about him going after your niece too.

You mention how he is the one seeking pleasure...and it sounds like you pleasuring him all the time, where is the balance? Do you get pleasure from him? Does he make love to you or just have sex for his self gratification.
For a relationship to be successful, both parties need to put in maximum effort to make it happen. Is he putting in any effort to anything beside maturbating and having sex and watching porn? I think you already know this relationship is going nowhere and you just want to hear it from someone else. I understand the heart ties formed when you have sex with someone and have been together a while. But there's a vast difference between loving another human or being in love with.

I love you because you're there for me when I need you" is different from "I love you because being with you brings more joy to me no matter what we do, even mundance chores. And I can't bear to be away from you, for you are the only woman that my heart beats for and my body wants to please. (Thats what my husband says to me) That is true 'being in love'
If your guy may be a male but he doesnt know how to be a man until he understands his real role is to support and uphold a woman and her creative abilities and that which she brings forth. The feminine as a creative force, being the ones who birth children, create a home, etc..need a man who will do whatever she needs him to do...putting her always first before himself.
Is this what you really want? Does the boyfriend even come close? Be brave and face the break of your heart if you're ready to move on. Later when you have found a better guy, you will laugh and wonder what you ever saw in him and how on earth did you even Love him. I say this is true cus I have experienced that very thing.

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Hello. Me and my boyfriend have been dating ever since May. We used to text a lot and then after that he had to go to two camps for two weeks and couldn't talk to me. Well now since he returned he does little to no texting me at all. He's ignored me for two days. He posts stuff on instagram but idk why he wouldnt see my texts! What should I do? Help me please!!! :(

The two of you really never had any real amount of time to bond in friendship. Can you call instead of text? Lots of guys hate typing for texting or FB.
How well did you know him, Do you know where he lives so you can drop by to say hi and see how things are going. If you still find it like pulling teeth to get any interest or response from him, I suggest you give up on him and wait for someone with better communication and friendship skills to come along.

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My daughter just started her period and the month after that she didn't have one and it's been 3 months since then. I know FOR SURE it's not pregnancy but I have no idea what it could be.

Someone else just wrote in that there was a delay of two months. It is becoming prevalent it seems. Nothing that happened in your teens or mine. I had irregular periods but more like having spotting 3 weeks, then a month til a real period, then 2 1/2 weeks before the next period. I went through the same thing in menopause. Since kids are developing faster and developing a libido at a much younger age, 10 than in my day, I can only think it could be linked to the hormones puts into the animals to make them grow faster to get to the supermarket for us to eat. Many articles and scientists have hinted at that. If that is true, then there can be something else that is new to what our kids and teens are getting that we didn't as kids and it has the side effect of making periods irregular or maybe worse case scenerio, sterile.
It could be something approved by by the FDA but the side effects are only now starting to show so Dr. wont have anything to tell you.
If I was in you shoes, I'd start doing research on the web to see if there are any other cases and what if anything they have in common. Once you have some ideas or leads to follow, then check it out. In meanwhile, If she isn't in pain, it shouldn't be life threatening.

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I'm in a rough situation right now, and it keeps happening because I can't "think before I speak"... The situation won't help with the question, by the way. But I really need to know how to think before I speak because I just speak and don't think... I know that's weird and confusing but please tell me how I can think before I speak. Help asap please, thanks.

When you get to urge to speak or have already started, pinch yourself real hard. Make it something unpleasant you feel each time you open your mouth too quickly.

You want to get the attention of your sub conscious mind where all your feelings and emotions come from. It is your feelings and therefore opinions about things that get you to jump in without thinking first. Or emotions like anger at something that someone said. Instead of keeping quiet and not responding, you add fuel to the fire. So give yourself a pep talk saying things have to change cus we are getting ourselves into trouble. Let your sub conscious know you will give it a chance to voice its opinion as it so much wants to do but from now on it must tell you when you are by yourself so you can think about it and evaluate how is best to respond if at all. Your awake/conscious mind needs to become friends with your subconscious. Right now it sounds like your subconscious mind is leading you around on a leash.

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Okay, so I'm 14 and I'm starting to have a really bad relationship with my parents. They never listen to me (ignore me when I state my opinion or tell me I'm wrong because I'm a kid), they are never satisfied (once my mom made me redo a chore clean the bathroom because she didn't "see" me clean it. WTF!?!?!?!?!?!)

and they pick on me SOOOO much. They find every little mistake I make, and never notice when I do good (on tests for example). They find all the bad traits about me and compare me with others. Once I tried standing up to my mom when she compared me to my cousin by saying "But I'm not him, Mom!" and she grounded me because of that and I wasn't even trying to be a smart aleck.

and they blame EVERYTHING on me. So once, the toilet got clogged and they blamed it on me BUT HEY, I WASN'T EVEN THERE THE WHOLE DAY SO WTF!?!

*Sorry for capitals, I just want to show much I'm frustrated and also if I sound spoiled or bratty. I actually do work hard at school to earn privileges. It's just my parents are so unreasonable.

btw, I'm not a perfect English-speaker. I'm French-canadian but I still speak English well enough (I think).

You communicate better than most teens writing in. Actually you sound very mature to me at 14. You gave examples for the problems you mentioned. Most wouldn't bother to give that info. I have no idea why your parents are like that. It does not sound fair. There are girls who cut themselves, are in depression or contemplating suicide for what you are facing and dealing with. So Kudos to you for holding it together as long as you have.

One thing that could be happening is that they are acting out how their parents treated them. It is a type of abuse, psychological abuse. It is well proven that abused kids, (usually physical & sexual abuse) grow up to become abusive as well. If this is the case then family counseling is needed. HOw to get that to happen is the harder part since they don't feel you can ever be right about something. This sounds like something to bring up to school counselors. Even if you are stilling managing, eventually the pressure will build til it affects your school work. Your parents won't be in trouble but the state may have a social worker check to make sure they get the counseling if that is indeed the problem. I usually hear of one parent being the problem but both...wow...sorry to hear that dear. You could try talking to aunts or uncles and give them your examples. Feel them out. Do they think your parents are being reasonable. If your grandparents were abusive, keep in mind that your aunts and uncles may have issues too. If there is one who seems to have come through remaining a friendly, openminded, well balanced person, then that is the aunt or uncle to talk to and ask them to approach the parents. If this isn't possible ask for help from school counselors.

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i am 19 yrs old . i am a virgin . i and my boyfriend were having fun. i was wearing my panties . his pre ejaculation fluid touched my panties and i think it touched my vagina also . usually my periods are always late by a week or so . actually all this happened on may 5th and i was supposed to get my periods on may 10 th but i dint get them till now. i did home pregnancy test 4 times till now . i did the test today also . but the result is negative always but i dint get my periods yet. i am very very tensed . are there still chances of me getting pregnant ? plz help me .

The problem here is that you were so stressed over the pre ejac. touching your skin through your panties, that the actual stress of your worry caused your period to delay. Illness will do this too. Sperm inside the vagina can live in a woman's cervical mucus or upper vagina for three to five days. If in seminal fluid outside the body they only live a few hours. Sounds like you will soon be ready for some birth control. It will take lots of the worry off of any pre ejac fluid getting anywhere near enough to impregnate. Read online first about all the different types available, the pros and cons. For some the cons outweigh the pros. and on others the pros outweigh the cons. Lots has to do with how your body responds to different hormonal treatments. Read womens comments on what side effects they suffered and if you aren't willing to live with them...then go for a non-hormonal bc. Two choices, diaphragm and the copper IUD. I used the copper IUD when married at 20 and never had to do a thing. Took it out after about 6 years and got pregnant right away. So your only chance of getting pregnant right now is if you have sexual play without protection. If you don;t have a Dr. you can go see Planned parenthood

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I have gotten my period since I was 11. It usually goes from the first to the seventh of each month, but i havent gotten it for the last two months. I'm not sexually active AT ALL? Is this bad? Should I be worried??????????

I was 14 when I got mine. From my very first period it didn't follow any textbook example and yet I was healthy. First one lasted about 3 weeks of light spotting , then nothing for couple of months, then a real period, then 2 weeks of nothing and then a week of spotting, you get the picture. No pattern. Since I had no pain or other distressful symptoms, I chose to not see a Dr. I wasn't sexually active at the time so I had nothing to worry about there either. After about a year passed, it finally became regular. The only time to be worried is if there is pain. Every gyn appt the dr always asks if I've had any unsual pains or problems with my cycle. Next they ask if I have pain with intercourse. And thats it.
Sometimes you can miss periods due to stress or illness usually it's just delayed. If you havent had sex and have no Pain, I wouldnt worry.
If you cant get over your worry, then go see a dr. for the peace of mind.

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Im 16 and all of my friends have had their "time of the month." I havent. I really feel bad because im dating this guy and he tries to to intimate but i dot know if i should get intimate. Would it effect me at all if i would have sex even though i havent had my period?

Because ovulation occurs before a period, there is no way to know if you can get pregnant without having some protection. Since you haven't had your cycle yet, I hesitate to suggest any hormonal birth control because I don't know if it could mess up your natural cycle starting. Hormones mess with womens bodies in many ways, lots of side effects, some have trouble getting a normal cycle later or the opposite, heavy bleeding that won't stop. If you decide you are ready to have sex, I would suggest you read up on-line about the copper IUD not the Mirena. The copper has a way of preventing pregnancy without use of hormones. With this IUD you can have regular periods every month. So as far as I know it shouldn't interfere with that but check with a professional on the topic. Either go see your gyn or go see Planned Parenthood. Your parents don't have to know. They will advise you what is best for BC if you haven't started a cycle yet.

If this is the only reason you are not sure about having sex, go get this taken care of. If you have other reasons such as you like him as a friend but don't really have any strong romantic feelings, then you may want to let him. I don't he's willing to continue dating you if it's not ending in having sex. Don't feel bad if this is the case, you want your 1st time to being reasonably nice despite that fact that you are just learning. So you should feel some chemistry, be attracted to the guy that you have sex with. There is much you can learn about dating, relationships and sex from a youtube channel, Sex Plus by Laci Green. I highly recommend you look her up. She's a peer for you... college age.
Good luck dear.

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Ok. I'm 13. And I have just discovered masturbation. I have Also discovered many different things like toys and dildos. Buy I can't get one of those. I'm not 18. So I have held back being afraid I was too young. But will I still be a virgin if I stick my finger in? And u haven't gotten my period yet so it scares me that I could bleed and have to explain to my mother that it isn't my period. I'm a little scared and some advice would help.

Even little baby's and toddler will touch themselves there because it feels good. They may not have orgasms but the ability to feel pleasure is there. If you want to masturbate, even though yu haven't got a period yet, there's nothing wrong with that.
You will be a virgin until the day a real live penis enters you. when you have a period and place tampons in your vagina, that doesn't make you any less a virgin.
The use of your fingers inside yourself or a dildo or vibrator is actually a good idea for a couple reasons, it takes care of when you are horny and the other that it helps stretch the hymen out which i suspect is your biggest concern. The only women who really bleed a little is those who have not had the hymen stretch out ahead of penetration by a penis. Even then, If a man doesn't use lubrication and pushes in too fast instead of easing in slowly, that can give some tearing to your skin. The hymen is now recognized as a remnant of vaginal formation in utero. Some women have more or less of a hymen naturally so it can't be used as an indicator whether someone has had sex yet or not. The hymen does not need to be popped because it does not totally cover the vagina. It it did, how would a females menstrual flow escape her body? In fact, I have something for you to watch. Sex Plus with Laci Green on youtube. Accidently ran across her and subscribed immediately. She is more your peer age, college. and funny but knowledgeable. Here's her 3-4 min video on the hymen. She has em on relationships and dating, all sorts of things.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qFojO8WkpA

Be sure to watch all her videos. Theres stuff to learn about virginity, about menstruction, your labia, etc... Good luck dear.

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I have been transitioning to natural hair for 7 months. I was aiming for at least over a year or more for my transition, but my hair is becoming unmanageable! Every time I wash my hair, my permed ends are always matted and tangled, even with conditioner applied. I detangle my hair & it still tangles. Is it because the two hair textures are beginning to clash??

Do you try detangling by hand or have you tried hair de-tangling sprays? Those work pretty well.
But they do fix the problem. The perm can dried and made your ends rough. Think of scales on a fish. the hair strand has layers like that which when healthy lie smooth. When unhealthy, they stick out at odd angles so then they act much like velcro and stick together. Try treating just the permed portion of your hair with an application of mayonnaise. Yes, you read that right. There are many natural things around the house that are remedy's for damaged hair. The oil and the egg in the mayonnaise is left on the hair a while to soak in, will help to moisturize the hair. Massage the mayo into the ends of your hair. Get someone to help do that in back. If its multi layered hair, you may want to skip doing ends and massage it into all of your hair. Wear a towel in case anything drips off. It will smell funny as it heats up from warmth of your scalp but the smell goes when you wash your hair after wards. Try to leave it on for 20-30 mins. Just keep busy doing something else before you go shower it out. You could also do raw egg treatment. Beat up an egg and apply it to your hair. If you have lots of volume of hair you may need to use a 2nd egg. Give it as much time as you can stand for the egg to really penetrate the damaged hair shaft. Even when your hair is finally healthy, use this every once in a while on your hair to help keep it healthy. Try to not shampoo your hair every day when you shower. That strips your hair of more of the natural moisture it creates. Its okay for your hair to get wet but try to resist constant shampoo use. I only shampoo twice a week when I used to do so daily. My hair is healthier now. Your hair will thank you and you go through less shampoo so you'll save a little money. Read online about natural hair conditioners from items in your kitchen. Good luck!

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i'm 13 i've been with my boyfriend for 9 months and i kind of want to sex. idk though. help!?

Kind of is not a strong enough reason to have sex.
Being curious as to what it feels like is not a strong enough reason to have sex.
Wanting to hold onto a boyfriend who is pressuring you to do this if you care about him, is not a good reason to have sex.

At your age, there is no reason to hurry to have sex. No its not a bad thing to be a virgin. My 3 daughters knew I would support them if they fell for a guy and in dating him got to the point that she wanted sex. I only wanted to know so I could take them for birth control. Even with the green light to experience sex, none of them did until graduated or 20 or 21. They waited for a guy they really cared about. Not trying to talk you out of it. Just want you to do so because there are enough loving caring feelings between you and it's something you want to do, not that he wants you to do it for him...its a mutual decision.

Perhaps the reason you don't know if you want to have sex is because you have not had a convo with your boyfriend yet. Have a good chat about it. Decide how much you both would be happy with for a first time. Sometimes, just kissing and mutual masturbation is enough for the first few times. You two decide what, and when. However consider first getting on some good birth control whether the pill or the shot. With the pill you have to remember daily to take it or it won't be as effective. With the shot, it's once every 3 months. You can get birth control at Planned Parenthood and don't need parents approval. They don't turn anyone away because of age. Make sure that is part of your planning this out. Good luck dear.

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