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bad relationship with my parents (teen)

Question Posted Thursday June 20 2013, 8:14 pm

Okay, so I'm 14 and I'm starting to have a really bad relationship with my parents. They never listen to me (ignore me when I state my opinion or tell me I'm wrong because I'm a kid), they are never satisfied (once my mom made me redo a chore clean the bathroom because she didn't "see" me clean it. WTF!?!?!?!?!?!)

and they pick on me SOOOO much. They find every little mistake I make, and never notice when I do good (on tests for example). They find all the bad traits about me and compare me with others. Once I tried standing up to my mom when she compared me to my cousin by saying "But I'm not him, Mom!" and she grounded me because of that and I wasn't even trying to be a smart aleck.

and they blame EVERYTHING on me. So once, the toilet got clogged and they blamed it on me BUT HEY, I WASN'T EVEN THERE THE WHOLE DAY SO WTF!?!

*Sorry for capitals, I just want to show much I'm frustrated and also if I sound spoiled or bratty. I actually do work hard at school to earn privileges. It's just my parents are so unreasonable.

btw, I'm not a perfect English-speaker. I'm French-canadian but I still speak English well enough (I think).

[ Answer this question ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?

kittenlover2000 answered Tuesday June 25 2013, 11:25 am:
As much as I empathize with what you're going through, I don't know what advice you want, because there wasn't a question.
Inbox me with a specific question and I'll help you :)

[ kittenlover2000's advice column | Ask kittenlover2000 A Question

Dragonflymagic answered Thursday June 20 2013, 11:09 pm:
You communicate better than most teens writing in. Actually you sound very mature to me at 14. You gave examples for the problems you mentioned. Most wouldn't bother to give that info. I have no idea why your parents are like that. It does not sound fair. There are girls who cut themselves, are in depression or contemplating suicide for what you are facing and dealing with. So Kudos to you for holding it together as long as you have.

One thing that could be happening is that they are acting out how their parents treated them. It is a type of abuse, psychological abuse. It is well proven that abused kids, (usually physical & sexual abuse) grow up to become abusive as well. If this is the case then family counseling is needed. HOw to get that to happen is the harder part since they don't feel you can ever be right about something. This sounds like something to bring up to school counselors. Even if you are stilling managing, eventually the pressure will build til it affects your school work. Your parents won't be in trouble but the state may have a social worker check to make sure they get the counseling if that is indeed the problem. I usually hear of one parent being the problem but to hear that dear. You could try talking to aunts or uncles and give them your examples. Feel them out. Do they think your parents are being reasonable. If your grandparents were abusive, keep in mind that your aunts and uncles may have issues too. If there is one who seems to have come through remaining a friendly, openminded, well balanced person, then that is the aunt or uncle to talk to and ask them to approach the parents. If this isn't possible ask for help from school counselors.

[ Dragonflymagic's advice column | Ask Dragonflymagic A Question

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