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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
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I have ONLY had protected sex (condoms) , but im concerned that I am pregnant. The only time i had a broken condom, he only had precum and i took the morning after pill. He has never came on the outside of my vagina, and he always pulls out. If a guy doesnt cum into your vagina, what is the likelihood that you will get pregnant? Like, does the sperm have as much of an effect if it is not "shot" up the vagina? Most people can go by a missed period, but my period is very irregular. I have not gotten it, but for me that doesnt mean too much. I've taken pregnancy tests and they have all been negative, but should i trust them? Any ideas about anything would be helpful. Thanks
You have placed a lot of stress on yourself over the possibility your pregnant. Stress alone can cause you to miss your period. If you look at your body as a finely tuned watch. When you place that watch under extreme stress it will not give accurate time. This is probably what is happening with your body and your period.
You took the morning after pill; the home pregnancy test(s) are negatives; so I would suggest you stop worrying. To answer your question on home testing. One test showing a negative could be a false answer, multiple tests giving the same answer is a probability that the answer is correct.
You don't say how old you are but I'm going to guess you are somewhere between 13 and 18. Please reread what you have written to us. From what you have written I see two main things.
First: You are almost paranoid about the possibility you are pregnant. This and what I will write as the second thing leads me to believe you are closer in age to 13.
Second: Your knowledge of sexual reproduction,"Like, does the sperm have as much of an effect if it is not "shot" up the vagina?" is woefully in need of greater knowledge and understanding. To answer your question; anytime sperm enter the vagina the chance of pregnancy is there. If sperm lands near the vagina and can make entrance, pregnancy is possible. The further the sperm has to swim the less likely the chance of pregnancy. Just remember it only takes one strong swimmer to become pregnant if the time is right for you.
My suggestion is:you refrain from any more sexual intercourse's until you are older and understand just what the consequences of adult sexual relations are. Keep in mind one thing about teenage boy. Actually two things. One they are hard wired at puberty to have sex. Because of this they confuse love and lust. Second they cannot keep a secret. Once you have sex with them they are going to tell somebody. Most likely their best buddy. Before you know it your name is on a bathroom wall. "For a good time call _____. You become very popular, but not for the reasons you want. How do I know that? I was once I teenage boy.
My advise is to keep you pants and panties on. Once there off your chances of pregnancy increase .exponentially If you feel you must satisfy your BFs sexual needs, there are other ways of doing so that so not require you to get undressed.
she shoplifed at walmart got arrested and charged with petty larceny she was told msince she did work their they terninated and they was going to go and look at the video of her days working their....if they do find she stolen again ....whats to happen? are they taken her bk to jail???
Depending on the total value of whatever she is found to have stolen she could be charged with Petty Larceny, a misdemeanor or Larceny a Felony. This depends on the laws in the state you reside in as they differ from state to state.
If your friend if a juvenile, under 17, the state has the option of referring the matter to family court should Walmart decide to press charges. Family court has many different way of handling juvenile problems.
If charged as an adult and charged with a misdemeanor it would be handled in District court where she could be fined, given community service, probation, jail time any or all of the above. Should the charge be larceny the same results are possible just the punishment is harsher as in longer and fines are higher. She would also most likely be made to repay Wal-Mart for what she stole. I'm sure Wal-Mart would also ban her from their stores
okay so i see your point on how being a virgin means you cant do it up the butt. Consider this though, you can get an STD by just having him rub his dick against your vagina withough inserting it into the vagina or butt. So i consider being a virgin if you have sex in the vagina because if the reason for sex is to have kids and by your definition of sex (doing it in the butt or vagina) then technically you can get pregnant in the butt? no you cant so technically losing your virginity is having sex in the vagina not butt, because you cant get pregnant by doing it in the butt.
I too am not sure of what your question is.
If you are asking what is the meaning of the term virginity, or if you fit the term as being a virgin? That too is open to interpretation in today's society.
The term virgin, originally has been taken to mean; pure, untouched, sexual novice. Meaning in the case of a women she is sexually inexperienced. By that definition and taking into consideration what you have written, many people may consider you a virgin any longer, even though your Hymen may be intact.
In today's society many consider a women who has not had sexual intercourse, penis to vagina penetration, to be a virgin. Others will say any women who has had any type of sex play such as handjobs, blowjobs, fingering or anal sex but not vaginal sex to be a technical virgin. There are many people who will tell you there is no such thing as being a technical virgin.
A woman can still be a virgin even if the Hymen is no longer intact provided there is never been any vaginal intercourse. Hymens can be broken from a variety of causes. Tampon insertion,and physical activities such as horseback riding and gymnastics are just a few of the reasons.
So depending on just what your question is you consider what I have written as the answers to what you are looking for.
So I'm a 19 year old college student. I live in my own and have a steady job and I have always dated older men but 25 has always been my cut off age.I recently met this guy that is 27 and we connect on a different level. I am starting to really develope feelings for him but im a little nervous about the age gap? would it be wrong for me to date him?
Age can be just a number or it can be a tripping point. Zane makes a good point. Your boyfriend has already experienced a lot in life, things that you will want to experience before settling down to being a wife and mother. Your boyfriend on the other hand is looking for a life companion. Someone to support him in his role as husband and father. To help him climb the corporate ladder if needed.
While you may have always dated older men and may even identified more with older men; I don't think you are ready to settle down yet to the life your boyfriend may be looking for.
Before you allow yourself to fall head over heals for this guy you need to find out where this relationship may be going from his point of view. What he expects things to be like in 5, 10 and 15 years down the road. See how his life plan fits with your life plan. Are you ready to be a wife and mother? Can you be a wife and mother during the day and if needed be eye candy for the corporate bosses should he be a corporate climber? Can you do all this and keep house and work at a job outside the home if needed?
While I'm not looking to rain on your parade. Given your age difference I feel it is important that you take this information into consideration before you allow yourself to fall for him and then get hurt. What I have written here is the same conversation I would have with you if your were my daughter and came to me with this question.
I'm not saying the age difference is to great. That is something you need to decide. What I am saying is be cautious. Consider everything, not just today; but tomorrow and years ahead to make sure you are not letting yourself in for a big fall.
I think I want a divorce, My husband does not trust me and I do not trust him, but we have a kid together and I do not want to make it harder for my child. He gets to go out and do whatever he wants and I am supposed to be at home and ok about this. He keeps telling me that I am not his mother. I do not feel that it is fair for him to go out without me and when we do go out it feels like we are not even together. we have only went out once in about 2 years the rest of the time he has went out by his self
what should I do?
The most important thing in a marriage is trust. Absence trust any relationship is going to fail; Be it marriage or dating.
To get to the point where two people marry there had to be something more than just a good sex life. There had to be mutual respect, admiration and trust. Before you throw this marriage on the trash heap you should look to see where you two lost these things. Marriage counseling may help, only if both of you are committed to saving your marriage.
You did not say how long you have been married or when all this started to happen. It didn't happen over night that I'm fairly certain of. I would suggest you first try to save your marriage through marriage counseling and self-examination of where your marriage started to go wrong. If you and your husband cannot or are not willing to try and save your marriage then divorce is the best solution.
I find it interesting that you said; "I do not want to make it harder for my child". You don't explain what you mean by this statement. Divorce will always be hard on a child. It is up to the parents to make this as easy on the child as possible and not to use the child as a pawn. Remember the child loves both of you.
Don't put the child in the position of wanting to or to think he/she has to chose one over the other. Also neither parent should tell or make the child believe that one parent is more responsible then the other. All the child needs to know for now is that while mommy and daddy still love each other they just can't live together any more but they both still love him/her. If asked for an explanation you say it is an adult thing you will explain when he/she is older.
I am going through a very difficult year, and basically just need help finding the old me and dealing with depression.
average girl: honors student, artistic and musical, all into sports, with the sweetest boyfriend and out nonstop with friends. senior in highschool and my cousin dies, i get skin cancer and a blood disorder, my boyfriend gets severe brain cancer, my family falls apart, i take in two kids, get into drugs, push all my friends far away and am kicked off sports for grades/medical, miss so much school and am diagnosed with depression(duh). unbelieveable amount of crap.
im really just in the pit and dont know how to get out. How do i get my positivity back, all that i lost including friends, and just fix becoming this hermit and the other flaws? My interests and life are gone how do i get it back?
Wow, if anyone has a reason to be depressed you certainly have. This last year is full of stressors that bring on clinical depression. I'm assuming that is what you have been diagnosed with.
I too suffer from clinical depression, now in remission. I was involved in an auto accident, the only innocent in a 3 car pile up. One would think with everything including the police report proving I had nothing to do with the cause of the accident. The involved insurance companies would pay my medical bills and other claims as well as something for my pain and suffering. I was driving a company vehicle at the time so workers compensation was involved as well.
Long story short that is not what happened. Each of the lawyers involved tried to make it look like I either caused the accident or was lying about the extent of my injuries. It was five years of living hell and one day I found myself literally falling into a dark hole I couldn't stop falling into.
I've told you this not to commiserate with you. I did so that you understand that I have been where you are and you would believe me when I say to you there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You have taken the first step and been diagnosed.
The second step is to take the medication that has been prescribed. It may make you a little spacey at first but after a few weeks your body gets use to the medication. If your not on medication I would suggest you ask for some. The best doctor to ask for medication is a psychiatrist. No your not crazy. The two chemicals that cause clinical depression are secreted into the brain. Therefore a psychiatrist is the better doctor to prescribe medication.
The third step is finding a good clinical psychologist for talk therapy. When I say finding a good therapist what I mean is finding some one you are comfortable with. Someone that you can talk to like a best friend who will keep your secrets. You can talk to your therapist on any and all subjects, not just what you think is your current problem. Whatever you speak about stays confidential. No one not your parent, not your family doctor, not even you prescribing psychiatrist can be told what goes on in these sessions without your written release of information to that specific person.
I went through 3 therapist before I found my current therapist. I have been with her for 7 years now. At first we went through intensive therapy. Now we see each other once, sometimes twice a month just to check in. Checking in with her keeps me balanced and gives me the support I need to keep my depression in remission.
We are at the point now that we have somewhat of a mutual admiration for each other. She keeps telling me I am where I am at because of the hard work I've done. I keep telling her I am where I am because I was lucky enough to find her. Fact is I was lucky enough to find someone that I became comfortable enough with to her things I have never told my wife about myself. This is the type of therapist you need to try and find.
I had bronchitis for over two weeks, my breathing was getting better until now, my dad was working on the (ancient) house and as soon as I get home, I start coughing, now Its hard to yawn and I can't spit the mucus out anymore, is this going to add another month to my recovery? Can i get bronchitis again? If the stairs kill me tomorrow I'm going to be really pissed off.
We are not doctors so we should not and cannot make any medical diagnosis. Common sense says that the dusty environment of rehabbing an old home is not good for your inflamed bronchi. So my educated guess would be yes it is possible. You should wear a dusk mask while dad is working on the house.
Your dad should also be careful about rehabbing old homes. Many old homes have asbestos in the walls and much of the material he may be pulling down. The asbestos is not good for your inflamed lungs now and the long term effect of the exposure is even worse, for you and the entire family.
Before major rehab of an old house I would suggest to anyone that they have the house inspected for lead paint and asbestos. If lead paint and asbestos are present they need to be mitigated by licensed contractors before any rehab works begins.
If your father has not done so you might want to say something to him. Not only is this dangerous to you and your entire family. It is dangerous to anyone living close to you. All it takes is one neighbor complaining to local building authorities. The fine, if lead paint or asbestos is found in the trash, can be staggering. Trash or waste from building demolition from these two items must be disposed of properly and at licenced facilities.
Hey all, 24f here, my boyfriend is 23.
This is such a weird question for me to ask, but why not?
We haven't been together too long (a few months), but we've known each other for almost 10 years, so there's a lot of history and a lot of trust. Being that there's a lot of trust/openness and honesty, we've started talking about fulfilling sexual fantasies. I'm still trying to figure out what mine are, having never had the chance to explore that, but one of his is, as most guys, to have a threesome with another girl.
He wants me to pick the girl so it's someone I'm comfortable with. I tried to be open to a couple of his ideas, but when it came down to it I was uncomfortable, and told him so. So, it's on me.
I've actually talked to a couple of my girl friends about this, but one of them is on a different continent for who knows how long, and another is currently in a relationship, though she's not happy... Don't worry, I'd never encourage someone to cheat on their significant other.
I really actually WANT to do this with my boyfriend. My only stipulations were "she has to be clean and tested."
I'm just kind of wondering, has anyone had experience with this kind of stuff? Has anyone successfully had a threesome and had a good experience? Bad experience? How did you initiate? How did you set it all up? That kinda stuff. I need ideas. I've never done this before...
Thanks for your feedback!
The operative words in everything you have written are these; "but when it came down to it I was uncomfortable, and told him so. So, it's on me."
When it comes to sex between two consenting adults I believe almost anything is possible as long as you follow certain rules.
The first and most important rule is both partners must be freely be willing to participate in whatever the other has asked to try. You in your own words have stated you are uncomfortable with a threesome. Yes you said the other girl must be "clean and be tested." This is not consent or consenting.
You have reservations about participating in a threesome. Until you resolve any issues YOU have about this I would suggest you not participate.
Should you decide to go ahead and participate, rule number two becomes very important. Rule number two is that no means NO and stop mean STOP. Stop means stop what your doing right now. Even if you initially consent to doing something once anyone, you, him the other girl says stop; all activities cease. To continue is RAPE.
These two rules work very well for any sexual activity you and anyone you chose to have sex with. Consent by both parties is very important, anything else is RAPE. No and stop means NO and STOP; anything else is RAPE.
It doesn't matter if any of us have had and enjoyed a threesome or any other sexual activity. We are all different in are make up and sexual likes and dislikes. To ask us about this is sort of like asking us if we liked jumping off bridges(bungee jumping). Would you jump off a bridge just because I did and liked it. I doubt it, you would have to overcome your own fears first.
My advise to you is to say no to a threesome for now; I don't think you are comfortable enough to participate in one and should not do so just to placate your boy friend.
Keep in mind the two rules I wrote about and use them to guide you and I believe you will have wonderful sex life ahead of you.
Hey, I am a 17 year old female. I have a 17 year old male best friend. We have been best friends since the third day of third grade. I love him like a brother because that is how I see him. Everybody else, however, tells me daily that him and I are going to get married. That "everybody can see that we are in love except for us." I have read numerous places that a boy and a girl can not be best friends because of sexual tension. Either the girl wants to have sex with the boy or the boy wants to have sex with the girl. I completely disagree, my friend and I aren't like that.
What do you guys think? Can a girl and boy be best friends and that's it?
There is nothing that says two people of the opposite sex cannot be best friends. In fact two people who are best friends first can also become lovers, there is nothing that says that can't happen either.
The best marriages, the ones that last a life time are the ones were lovers become best of friends as well. Physical attributes are what attract us. Sex brings us together. What keeps us together as a couple is mutual affection, love and friendship.
While sex and affection are important to a relationship. To stay together for a life time there must be more. That more is mutual respect and friendship. Your friends may be right. You two have the hard part already working for you. The rest will come should the two of you want it too; just don't try to force it.
I'm sueing my ex for the $300 he never repaid me (we have a contract with a due date, etc.) But my question is that when I win this case, will it go on his permanent record that he was sued in small claims for failing to repay a debt of $300? Will this affect him later down the road with credit scores and background searches, etc? Just wondering!
Thank you
It can. It depends if any of the credit agency's that report and rate someones creditworthiness. They would have to pick up on the bad debt and the small claims court award independently.
Generally this information is passed on by businesses which reports credit information to the credit agencies. I have heard that there are times these agencies do pick up on this information independently.
13/f
I found out that my 15 yearold boyfriend got me pregnant.I called him and told him and he freaked out. He told he can't take care of a baby now and that he doesnt want to be part of this.I don't know what to do about the baby.I don't know how to tell my parents and don't know what to do about my boyfriend.I need help and I'm scared.
Unfortunately if you are sure you are pregnant you have no choice but to tell you parents. It won't be easy. It's not something you say at the dinner table like; "please pass the butter and oh by the way I'm pregnant."
You ask your parents to sit down with you someplace quiet without any siblings around to disturb you and you just tell them. No preamble just; "Mom, dad I'm pregnant and so and so is the father. There will be crying, yelling and screaming, then there will be calm. When they calm down you can talk.
Unfortunately at 13 you have very little say in what is to happen next. Whether you have the baby or not, if you are to give the baby up for adoption or if you raise this child yourself are choices your parents have to make for you. That is the law as of this time.
While your boyfriend may not want you anymore he cannot just walk away from this situation either. He, mainly his parents at this time, are just as responsible for his baby as your parents are. His responsibilities do not end until this child obtains the age of 18.
Should your parents decide that you should have this baby and raise this child; then you and your parents need to contact a lawyer to make sure the courts insure that your boyfriend and his parents provide for this child as required by law until the child is 18.
I'm not going to lecture you on what you shouldn't have done. It is to late for that and I'm sure mom and dad are going to do a good job of that. Your job now is to do what is right based on what you parents feel is right.
ok im 13 f and i really want a new wardrobe because ive been starting to stop wearing hollister and aeropostel and start moving on to like forever 21 wet seal etc. so i really want more clothes but my mom thinks i have enough clothes but i really want newer clothes since mostly all my shirts say hollister and aero and stuff like that. but she still will say no but i really want to have a better style and not as boring especially for winter? what are some ways i can get her to get me newer clothes and go shopping??
Wanting, getting and mom being able to afford buying are three different areas of conversation.
In today's economic times we have to be more frugal than possibly in times past. There are factors at play here that you are not aware of and as a child, yes in this instance you are the child, you need not be aware of these factors.
You parents income only goes so far. Employers are hard pressed to keep people employed. To do so many companies are not giving out raises or bonuses. This means your parents are paying today's bill and buying today's necessities with yesterdays incomes. I hope you understand the meaning of what I just said.
They are paying more for things such as food, gasoline, electric, water the necessities of life, with the same income they made one or two years ago. Yet all of these things have increased in cost. This means they have less surplus income to pay for things you may WANT but don't really NEED.
If the clothes you have are still serviceable, and still fit you, you may have to put up with not having the in style cloths you want until you actually NEED to replace something until it no longer fits you or is no longer serviceable.
The one thing you can do to help yourself is: In many states being 13 you are old enough to babysit. If your parents are in agreement with you babysitting then contact neighbors and friends who may need or know of friends who need babysitters. The money you earn you can spend on the clothes you want.
Otherwise all you can do is wait until mom can actually afford to buy you the clothes you want or wait until mom feel you need new clothes. Do yourself a favor here and don't write back to me and say mom or dad can afford to buy you whatever you want. You don't know that for sure and your not suppose to know things like that. Family economics is a worry for parents not children.
I'm sure you don't like what I wrote but this is just the facts of life at this time. As a parent I can tell you it hurts when we have to say no to our children when they truly want something; especially like stylish clothing. Please don't bug your mother over this. I'm sure when she has the extra money she will put you ahead of whatever her knees may be.
See I have depression and I have told my friends. They are nervous I might take my own life because I get bullied. They care but they avoid me. One of my friends mom said they were all afraid of me. I don't know why. Though one really great friend is there for me. And not scared of me. I just am more depressed now.
The problem with depression is people don't understand what depression is. They confuse clinical depression with manic depression. Actually they really don't confuse the two, they don't know the difference. They think all depression is manic depression or bipolar disorder.
As you may be aware clinical depression is more easily controlled, even cured or put in remission, through medication and talk therapy. Manic depression or bipolar disorder can be controlled with medication but there is more problems with someone who is bipolar being compliant with medication.
I explain my clinical depression to people as being a lot like diabetes in that my body is not secreting enough of certain hormones to control depression just like a diabetic cannot regulate their sugar. Bipolar disorder is truly a mental illness that requires strong psychotropic drugs to control.
If you have been diagnosed as clinically depressed and in treatment for clinical depression you are not a threat to yourself or anyone else. If you were you would be hospitalized. This is what people do not understand and what people like you and I have to explain to them. Manic depressive people who are in treatment and compliant with there medications are usually not a threat to themselves or anyone else. Again if they are in treatment and thought to be a treat to themselves or anyone else they would be hospitalized.
Below is a URL for a website of an organization called NAMI; National Alliance on Mental Health. This organization is for the support and eduction of those who suffer from mental health issues and the support of their friends and families.
It opens to a page requesting donations, just close that pop-up and the site page activates.
http://www.nami.org/
Hello,
I'm 19 and i've been with my boyfriend almost 7 months, i'm not considering having sex as of now unless it's over a year. I never wanted to lose it unless I got married because I am religious. I've been in other relationships, however i've never had to think twice about whether I want to do it before or after marriage and this guy i've loved him for a while we knew each for about a year before we dating and i always liked him and when we began dating my feelings grew much stronger. Long story short would you guys have sex before marriage or do you think it's too big of a sin to? also because i'm relgious I was wondering can you still go church after having sex before marriage without it being wrong? sorry if it's complicated i'm so confused apart of me wants to do it but religion is holding me back.
Religion and sex can be somewhat contradictory. In some regard the truly religious will say sex is strictly for procreation and not for recreation or pleasure. Not being all that religious myself I not only don't hold to that belief I don't see where it is written that way. I see that as man's interpretation of something that is not truly said.
Now to your question. A women to come to her marriage bed a virgin has been more of tradition that the women should be pure on her wedding night. There are still some societies that expect and do require that a women be pure on their wedding might. Some of these are old tribal traditions that have been brought with them to the new world. If the women is found not to be pure on her wedding night what can happen is not tolerated in our society.
A woman's virginity is still thought, by many men, to be a precious gift. If you wait to give your virginity to your husband, your husband to be or a long term lover he will be honored for receiving your gift. As to when and to whom to give this precious gift,is truly your choice.
Many women today chose to give their virginity away very early in their youth. They chose birth control and they still attend church and all the rights of the church. I would assume that includes confession as well. Birth control today, be it the pill or condoms or condoms and the pill are as much about conception prevention as it is about preventing STDs that can be prevented by condom usage. Not all STDs are preventable by condom usage.
So the answer to your question: Can you still go to church? I would say is yes.
You have a personal dilemma her that is really not whether you can go to church if you have premarital sex. What you are really fighting here is, are you ready to give in to your feelings and go against your personal beliefs. No one can answer that question for you. You are old enough now to have a sex life if you want one. The operative words being, "if you want one."
As my mother use to say just because Billy jumped of the bridge doesn't mean you have to as well. For you waiting until your wedding night to have your first sexual intercourse and allowing your husband to teach you about sex may be what is right for you.
You can only lose your virginity once. Make sure this is something you really want to do and it is with a man who will be loving and tender. Who will cherish the gift you are giving him.
and also i got cracks and bleeding on it what shoul i do?
I did some research for you on this subject. Every site that I went to spoke about the problem being most likely the baby not latching properly. There are several possible reasons for this the most popular one seems to be i,proper positioning.
The probable corrective action for this is to see a lactation consultant. Type "Lactation Consultant, (your State here)" into any search engine. This should bring up a directory with which to fined one.
Below are the URLs for two of the sites I felt would be most helpful to you.
Good luck and congratulations on your new born child.
http://www.babycenter.com/0_cracked-or-bleeding-nipples_8493.bc
http://www.parents.com/baby/breastfeeding/problems/breastfeeding-problems-and-solutions/?page=4
I have had this cold and flu for aprox 2 weeks now the doc said it would be over in 4 days. I've been resting a lot but now its hit my chest I can't stop coughing, I have lost 7 kg in a week, have the occaisional headache, sometimes dizziness and tiredness. Is this normal.?
We are not doctors and we cannot make diagnoses.
Something hanging on this long could be normal. Given the fact that you appear to have a new symptom I would suggest seeing your doctor again or seeing a different doctor for a second opinion.
I know no one on here are doctors but I just need a little help before I see one. I think I have anxiety. I'm already freaking out about high school and that's a year away. (I'm in 8th). Besides being just nervous about things I'm also nervous of getting lightheaded. I've seen many doctors about this but they don't know what it is. Ive gotten dizzy before a concert which makes me think it's anxiety. Whenever I'm nervous it happens because I work myself up over things. When something is out of the ordinary it might happen. Also how can I introduce thus idea to my parents without them laughing so I can get proper help. Thank you.
Being in the eight grade could put you at an age where you do not need parental permission or accompaniment to visit a doctor. If you are 14 years of age or older you have medical privacy and confidentiality under the law. You can seek medical assistance without parental permission. The Law is a Federal Law known as HIPPA. If you are not 14 then the law does not yet cover you.
Anxiety is usually caused by stress. In your case you are stressing about High School, this is very normal. My son was anxious about going to middle school and high school. The bad thing about stress is it can lead to clinical depression, not to be confused with manic depression aka bipolar depression. There is a big difference between the two.
Clinical depression is more of a medical condition in so far as one of two hormones is not being secreted in enough quantity to ward of the depression you are feeling. This is easily treated with drug therapy. Teenage depression is very common; more common then most parent want to admit. Most parents see teenage depression as a phase their child is going through which they will grow out of. Most times the child will grow out of the depression as they mature and learn to deal with the stressors. It is far easier for the child if their is medical intervention.
The anxiety attacks, the lightheadedness are all the result of stressors that could be indicators of teenage depression. Sometimes doctors don't see the ques or clues because they are not raised during the exam for different reasons. If mom is in the exam room you may be afraid to say something to the doctor. Mom may dismiss something you say and the doctor takes her word for it over yours.
You need to be screened for depression. If you are over 14 you can ask the doctor for the screening yourself. As the HIPPA law provides for medical privacy this means mom cannot be in the exam room with you while the doctor examines you. You can request mom wait in the waiting room and the doctor will see to it that your request is honored. Nothing said between you and the doctor can be told to your mother, or anyone else without your written consent.
Do not allow yourself to be forced to provide your consent if you don't want to. Having medical privacy means the you can be totally open with your doctor without fear of anything getting back to your parents. This is why the law was written the way it was. There are exceptions and the doctor will explain those exceptions to you.
If you are under 14 ask a teacher or school nurse to talk to your mom about having you screened for depression.
i'm 16 male and i'm christian and i strongly believe in god and his words and i don't want to have sex until i'm married i know there are teenagers having sex and i hear guys bragiing about having sex but i don't want to be like that
i want to find the right girl who also believes in no sex before marriage i don't think i can be with a girl who's had sex outside of marriage and who doesn't fully believe in god i hoping my first time will be special with someone i love and who also wants to wait for marriage i want to follow god's word there nothing wrong with that?
I applaud your thinking and as the others have pointed out I sincerely hope you do not fall victim to peer pressure. Your religious convictions sound strong enough that peer pressure should not be a problem for you.
To find the type of women you write about. I would suggest you stay within your church. Look for a woman/girl who has the same religious views as you do. When you find her and have taken the time to get to know her and the time is right; sex will be a beautiful thing for both of you.
Sex is not a game to see how many notches you can earn. Sex is not purely for procreation either. Sex between two adults who have grown to know and love each other is the next step in showing there love and affection for each other. In this manner sex is truly a beautiful thing.
You have established your moral center on this issue. Do not let anyone tell you you are wrong because they feel differently. You must do what is right for you. Doing what is right for you is always the right thing in whatever you do be it sex, school or work.
You are developing a good moral center. Stay with it and you will never fail.
Is it possible to contract an std (ghonerra, chlamydia, etc) from touching a vibrator or something like that? Not using it after someone, but after someone's used it and you touched it? sorry im so paranoid thank you
Yes it is possible to get an STD from someone else's sex toys, vibrator. While the vibrator is plastic and can be cleaned I'm not sure it can be sterilized to the point of killing the germs of the STD. Therefore if you use it or handle it you can transfer the STDs on it to you.
ok so i have a problem i am to scared to tell my mom that i cut myself i dont know how can you help me i am 14 and i am in 9th grade please help me
It would help to know what is scaring you in order to help you. What I do know is that cutting yourself is not the answer, in fact it is very dangerous. Cut to deep or in the wrong place and you can bleed out before help can arrive.
You cut because you are depressed and anxious; you want to feel something that you are not feeling. Until we can help you with whatever is scaring you I'm going to offer you an alternative to cutting. It is something psychologists use when helping people with anxiety.
Find yourself a big thick rubber band and let it hang loosely from one of your wrists. When you have the urge to cut snap the rubber band instead until the urge to cut passes. This is safer than cutting and will help relieve the anxiety attack you are having.
Like I said without knowing the problem it is hard to offer a solution. You can write back in a private message which means only I and the moderator of this site can see it, no one else.
There are only two things I can think of that can make you this scared to talk to your mother about. You have either been raped or are pregnant or are pregnant as a result of being raped.
If you have been raped, define rape as any force used to have sex with someone, do not blame yourself. Nothing you did or didn't do caused you to be raped. There is plenty of help we can offer on how to handle this.
If you are pregnant... well you are going to have to tell your mom sooner or later. I can offer some suggestions on how to start the conversation.