|
humorist-workshop
divorce or not
I think I want a divorce, My husband does not trust me and I do not trust him, but we have a kid together and I do not want to make it harder for my child. He gets to go out and do whatever he wants and I am supposed to be at home and ok about this. He keeps telling me that I am not his mother. I do not feel that it is fair for him to go out without me and when we do go out it feels like we are not even together. we have only went out once in about 2 years the rest of the time he has went out by his self
what should I do?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
The most important thing in a marriage is trust. Absence trust any relationship is going to fail; Be it marriage or dating.
To get to the point where two people marry there had to be something more than just a good sex life. There had to be mutual respect, admiration and trust. Before you throw this marriage on the trash heap you should look to see where you two lost these things. Marriage counseling may help, only if both of you are committed to saving your marriage.
You did not say how long you have been married or when all this started to happen. It didn't happen over night that I'm fairly certain of. I would suggest you first try to save your marriage through marriage counseling and self-examination of where your marriage started to go wrong. If you and your husband cannot or are not willing to try and save your marriage then divorce is the best solution.
I find it interesting that you said; "I do not want to make it harder for my child". You don't explain what you mean by this statement. Divorce will always be hard on a child. It is up to the parents to make this as easy on the child as possible and not to use the child as a pawn. Remember the child loves both of you.
Don't put the child in the position of wanting to or to think he/she has to chose one over the other. Also neither parent should tell or make the child believe that one parent is more responsible then the other. All the child needs to know for now is that while mommy and daddy still love each other they just can't live together any more but they both still love him/her. If asked for an explanation you say it is an adult thing you will explain when he/she is older.
]
If you aren't happy, Divorce him.
Trust is the main factor in any type of relationship, If you both don't trust one another then you shouldn't be in the marriage. You aren't entitled to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you despite having a child or not.
Now, If you both want to try and make things work between the two of you then I would say try marriage counseling. This is the last straw before filing for divorce but if your husband shoots down the idea then you are only left with one option. If he isn't willing to make it work then there is no point in being married to him.
]
More Questions: |