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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
I am 19 years old, female, from a family background of muslims (surprise, surprise).
I'm pretty much not allowed to wear what I want because everything I want to wear is considered inappropriate.
For example, yesterday I wanted to wear a skirt that is PAST knee-length, and only shows the lower shin area... which is half way to the knees. No big deal, right? Wrong! My mom just looked at me with this shocked look in her eyes, and said that we're going on a family picnic and that it's just not nice or appropriate.
And then she started drilling me on how my clothing is not appropriate or "long enough". She wants me to find tops that are like up to my knees. Like seriously? seriously?
And then she continues to tell me how my cousins also think my clothing is inappropriate as well since one of them called her and told her that I was wearing inappropriate clothing and that she did not feel comfortable.
And this cousin of mine wears a burqa that covers her face so clearly we both have different ideas on what is appropriate.
Last time, I went to a sleepover at her house. And when I got dressed to go to the mall, she started yelling at me for my clothing. I was wearing chiffon top with a tank top underneath, but from the back I guess the tank was low that you could see my bra straps so she started freaking out, and yelling at me. And telling me that what I'm wearing is not appropriate, and I can't wear what I want to because it's not appropriate, and that I'm at her house. And when I told her I was wearing a tank top underneath, she called me liar. Until I ripped it out from underneath to show her. Which actually made her shut up with an "Oh..."
Anyways, I'm angry, frustrated and really annoyed. I'm 19 years old, I think I'm old enough to make decisions on what I want to wear without having people attack me or belittle me because it's not up to their standards.
I usually don't say anything or argue back to my cousin out of respect, and because we're really close. But honestly now, I don't think I'm interested in having to deal with her. She's a total bitch in general, and starts arguments for no reason.
Anyways, for the future. Would it be better for me to confront her and tell her to back off and mind her own business?
Confrontation is never a good idea. In fact it is one of the few words I rarely use and recommend against using or doing so as nothing good comes from confronting someone.
You are correct in the thought that you are 19, legally and adult capable of making and following your own decisions. You are caught between family and religious beliefs and your rights as and adult.
In the USA and many other Western Countries, religious freedom and the right to chose is a basic right of the citizens. I would say to your cousin that I respect her rights to practice her faith and principals as she chooses and would ask that she allow me to practice or chose to follow what I believe is my inalienable right as a citizen of the country.
That when you are with her and other family you will try to dress as appropriately as you can so as not to not disrespect them or their beliefs. But you ask that they and she respect your right(S) to chose as is your right as a citizen and an adult.
She may see this as confrontational though I don't. It is not argumentative, it is simply and expression of your rights and desires as an adult women. She and other family members do not have to like how you dress, who you date, if you drive a car or anything else you may chose to do that you have a legal right to do.
What they should hopefully be willing to do, is respect your rights to do what you are legally allowed to do. You will respect their beliefs and customs even though you may not be practicing them.
I hope this helps.
Okay , so i was reading this article about this lady being pregnant and she is still a virgin , Is that really possible because i thought the hymen had to broken and the male has cum in you in order for you to actually become pregnant.
It is possible as the semen from the male only has to enter a vagina to make its way to an egg. This can happen in a variety of ways.
If the male ejaculates on or near a girls vagina it is possible for semen to enter. If a male or female ejaculates on to his or her hand and then fingers the girl semen transfer is possible.
It is also possible for the head of a penis to enter the vagina and not break the Hyman. While in the vagina a small amount of semen is emitted from the penis to act as a lubricant. The amount emitted has enough semen in it to impregnate a female.
I hope this answers your question.
hi ...i got married in 2011, after one year now i know that he is bisexual. i asked him when i got married whether he wae a gay..i dn't know but i some how felt so, but he managed me that nothing was wrong. after one year now i know that he is bisexual. i dn't know what to do... i love him a lot... but he did this to me. he says that he is committed to me and what ever he did was before our wedding. he had sexual relation with 50 guys it seems... for five years. i dn't know, i cant trust him... please help me....i feel like dieing.
im 26 years female, my husband is 27.
First thing you need to do is get both of you tested for STDs and HIV/AIDS. I'm sure once you have married if you are practicing safe sex it is more for birth control then disease prevention. Once you have the results of the tests you can make better decisions.
None of us can tell you what to do, only to advise you what we think and what we might do in your place. I believe it is, was, very wrong of your husband not to divulge his sexual past and preferences to you long before you accepted his marriage proposal.
His sexual preferences, together with the number of men he has had sex with, has placed you at great personal risk. To continue to keep you uninformed and practice his gay side increases that risk to you.
Had you known of his bi preferences prior to marriage would you still have married him? This is the first question you need to ask yourself. If the answer is no. Then the only direction I can see is divorce court as he has deceived you.
If the answer is yes with stipulations. Then those stipulations must be agreed to now. Whatever you may what from him in the way stipulations he must agree too.
You wrote that he said; "he is committed to me." He did not say nor does that mean he will give up his gay sex for you. Gay sex for a male is not just a matter of giving or receiving anal sex. If it were there are ways for you to satisfy both of those for him. Fact is it is a much different type of relationship. One which you will never be able to satisfy.
So even if he is willing to agree to whatever your stipulations may be. The next questions you need to answer for yourself is; "Can I trust him to live up to the stipulations?" Depending on your answer to this question is the answer to the question as to what direction you take with your marriage. Do you move forward or do you end the marriage?
You have one of the hardest decisions a married person ever has to make about their marriage. You've been lied to, miss lead and exposed to a great health risk. Is it possible to overcome all this and have a successful marriage? Only you can answer that question.
The only thing you must do now, today is get tested. If he refuses to be tested; then my advise is to move out, get tested and see a lawyer.
ok i'm 17 and i always told my parents i didn't want to date and they always told me to tell them when i wanted to start to date, so you know they can meet him an all. the problem is that i want to tell my mom because my parents are divorced and i trust my mom more but when i tried to tell my mom that this guy liked me and that i liked him too her reaction was happy only cause i told her i didn't want to date. so i had to lie because i was afraid pulse my mom has been feeling stressed with work and all the issues we have that i feel i shouldn't say anything but i feel bad for the guy i like hes very nice and is willing to meet my mom.its not his fault i'm too afraid to say anything! someone give me advice i dont know what to do....thanks
First I'm a parent old enough to be a grandparent.
If you were 14 or 15 I could understand your reluctance. Your 17 and it is about time you started dating. At 17 you are now mature enough to handle all of the different aspects of dating and if you plan on going away to college soon. You need the experience of dating while you still have the safety net of living at home. Call it dating with training wheels.
This is something we as parents understand. As much as mom may be stressed out with work and other things she is most likely anticipating you starting to date.
My advise is to make mom a nice cup of tee one night a sit down and talk with her. Tell her you have met a nice boy you would like to date. He would like to meet her before you two start dating. How and when is the best time for the 3 of you to get together to meet and talk. This would also be the time to ask mom if she has any dating advice for you.
I broke my parents knife set! The knives are all fine but the block is badly damaged! Where can I buy a wooden knife block online? I mean, they have had this knife set longer than they have had ME so I better have a plan by the time they get home from their trip and I have to tell them what happened. Help!
Look on the one of the knives. There should be some engraving or markings that will tell you who manufactures the knives. Then go on the Internet and search for that name. See if the company has a website and contact information.
Look for a customer service number and call them. Explain what has happened and tell them about the set, number of knives and any accessories. I'm sure if they have any knife blocks that fit that set they will sell you one or they may just send a replacement free of charge depending on how the one you damaged was damaged.
Don't despair too much these things happen. Knife blocks are generally made of wood and over the years the tend to dry out. If dropped for a counter they will crack. If that is what happened to you it could just as well happened to you mom or dad.
So to a search and make a call. If that doesn't work go to the mall and look at knife block sets in stores that sell them and find a set that is similar to the one you have. Then ask the store personnel to help you get a replacement block from that manufacturer.
I am 14 yr old girl and i have had sex. Over 13 guys have naked pictures of me. 5/13 were 18-20 yrs old. Am i concideres a whore.?
First I don't particularly like that word even for someone by definition who is one. Who to my mind is someone who walks the streets and gets paid for sex.
By your writing you are some one who is sexually promiscuous. This two is wrong for some one your age. I'm not a doctor and I certainly am not a psychologist but what I see is someone who is missing something in their life and trying to find it through sex. This is a very dangerous way to find whatever is missing in you life.
The people who are in possession of your naked pictures are in possession of child pornography since you are under 1q8. It matters not what their age is they can be prosecuted just for having them. Many states have enacted laws where you can be prosecuted for distribution for sending them. Child pornography, possession and distribution has become a zero tolerance offence. This is why social network websites such as Google and Facebook are working with the FBI and local law enforcement to track down those who send or post it over their websites in short you could go to reform school for sending these pictures to anyone and the others could join you or go to jail. So stop sending them.
You also have no control of these pictures once they leave your control . Years from now your own children could come across them on some porn site.
I've said I consider you sexually promiscuous. I don't know the reason for this but I can assume their is something missing from your life. Probably the type of love and affection you think you get from sex. At your age with the boys and men you are having sex with it is not love but lust and for the older ones it is a sick kind of lust to have sex with a child so much younger then them.
You need to stop this circle of destruction you are falling into before you are seriously hurt or some older man turns you out as a prostitute. Then you would be a whore.
If the problem is at home and you cannot go to one of your parents. Then please, please go to the nearest hospital emergency room and ask for help. They will help you and you do not have to worry about how to pay for it. You need to see a psychologist and find out what is missing and why you are having sex with so many men to find it.
You need to do this before you end up ruining your life for good, being hurt physically or even worse. No 14 year old girl should be having sex in the first place. If she is she should not be doing so with so many guys.
Can a person in their 20s strengthen their intellectual aptitude? Is it true that people usually reach their peak at a certain age? I have not yet gone to college. Am I too old to make a great improvement in an area I am not too great in? I did not take advantage of my education when I was in grade school. I really wish I had.
Sometimes I feel incompetent because of my lack of education. Even on this website, I find a columnist that has terrific writing capabilities, outstanding knowledge, and a vast vocabulary. It makes me feel a little smaller and a hint of jealousy. I mean columnists around my age of course; I would not compare to the elderly or the teens.
Sometimes I feel more stupid than I want to be. I can look back at things I write and it looks like I'm on a lower-level compared to others in my age group. Many things I attribute to my deprived life experience.
I once dated someone that made me feel inferior. He could write a whole page and in the neatest hand-writing while I was on sentence two with my average print. It was like that when it came to typing speed. In some classes we shared, it seemed that he was more informed than I was about the world.
In grade school, I excelled in math and literature. I actually looked forward to math knowing that I was one of the top-ranked in the class. It was the one class people came to me for help and the one class that others would tell me that I was intelligent besides teachers. My 115 on a test compared to their 87 gave them that idea.
Also in grade school, there were times where I excelled in all my classes when I put in my best effort. There were times where I flirted with boys and took my answers off their papers. There were times I spent an entire class doing homework for another class. There were times that I thought skipping school was better than going to school.
You can see that I deprived myself of a good education but a lot of kids and teenagers do. Many times in school, whenever I felt like I was learning something that I was picking up really well or something that I felt was an important piece in my education, the study in that field was cut short. That missing piece in my education could be very critical for me to know.
I wish I can go all the way back to the foundation of my education and build up. However, I know in college I am going to be starting at where I left off with all the gaps left to be a hindrance.
I do not want to feel so limited. I want to formulate intelligent sentences. I do my best with my writing but as I am putting my thoughts into words, I come short as I try to pull vocabulary or ideas out of my head. I feel that it's there but unattainable. I know my knowledge runs short. I know that as for how my memory works, I sometimes can not recall for all my wits anything without seeing something that brings the memory to me.
Many things I choose not to remember for I find that they will be of no use to me in the future or I could easily relearn them if necessary. I know this limits me as well.
I do have a favorable short-time memory which benefits me when cramming for a test. I can memorize a list of a hundred things or more in order and spelled correctly within a hour. I can usually hold that knowledge for one or two weeks before it dissolves into the forgotten abyss in my mind.
Anyway, I'm through talking about myself. I don't particularly want to read a book to answer my question. Nor do I want to be refereed to a webpage. I want to know what you think. I want your opinions or views on the matter. Anyone else feel the same way or similar? What's your thoughts and advices?
Any answers would be appreciated.
Lets start by my saying what you have written is not as rambling or incohecive as you may believe. It is a bit long and there are some things you could have left out though you made your point.
The point is that you feel under educated or poory educated. I do not see that in what you have written. Are you missing something from your primary eductation? Probably, though nothing that can't be made up in College.
Yes I said college. If you truly want to earn a degree from a 2 or 4 year institution you can do so, it will just take you a year or possibly a little longer while you make uo what is missing.
You are actually in the same place my son was at when he graduated High School. He chose to go into the Army Reserves. He found what he was missing in Basic Training, fortunatley. When he returned home he thought he wanted a career in Law Enforcement. Instead he ended up Honor Graduating from the first class the College gave for National Registry as a Paramedic. Today he is a Firefighter/Paramedic and very happy with his career choice. He is now looking to cross train as a Nurse. This from someone we were told to teach how to say, "do you want fries with that order." So don't under estimate yourself.
So what you must do is first decide what course of study you want to follow. What career choices you think you will be best at. Then go talk to your local community college advisors. They may want to test you to see what you are deficent in. They can then arrange a schedule of classes to include those course you need to make up and those course that will lead to the degree you desire.
It doesn't matter if you are 20, 30, 40 or older. While you cannot go back and capture your youth; you can always go back to school and learn something new. It is all up to you. If you have the desire nothing should get in your way of obtaining what you want. Once you have your AA Degree if you want the BA degree you apply to a 4 year school to finish the last 2 years.
I'm dnow due to a caree ending auto accident. When I was working I was a salesman, my manger and I disagreed on one important area. He felt if you left home in the morning and did not sell something you were unemployed that day. I disagreed. I felt if I left home in the morning and did not learn something new about my business or my customers business I wasted a day. If I didn't sell something that day I sold 2 or 3 the next day. I'm not going to say he was wrong. What I will say is that my entire career with that company I was generally among the top 5 in the company. Since there were only 5 regions in the company that would put me at the top of my region.
Knowledge is power. The more power you have the further you can go in your career. You gain knowledge through learning. We only stop learning when we die.
Stop putting yourself down. Go back to school and get the knowledge you need to make your way in a career of your choosing.
For a while now me and this guy have been having really good sex, I'd say about 3 days of the week, 2 or 3 times each day I see him.
Things were going REALLY good sex wise with him, and I think both me and him were loving it; we're both quite highly driven people, constantly horny etc. haha
So about three weeks ago I got my period during sex with him and naturally we stopped things as soon as we noticed. He got thrush about three or four days after that (whether it was linked or not I don't know) and we couldn't have sex for two weeks because of it (he said it was uncomfortable or painful for him). So that was about 2 and a half weeks we couldn't have sex. Then we tried it again and he came quite quickly so it wasn't that great. It's been three weeks now since we had good sex! We tried again last night and i started randomly bleeding from my urethra (god knows why!) so we had to stop. Then it just wouldn't stop bleeding so that was that evening ruined.
I'm getting so horny!! I am seeing him again tomorrow evening and I want to make sure that nothing goes wrong! The bleeding i experienced yesterday was a one off; i have had no pain at all and no more bleeding since then so i don't think it will happen again. There's no cuts.
How can i make sure that nothing gets in the way of us having a good evening?? I can't leave it any longer without sex!! Another thing... if it does go wrong, how can i stop myself from feeling grumpy and annoyed? I've been feeling pretty depressed since last night :(
Thanks!!
You asked a multi part question and also left out a very important question. So lets take this a step or part at a time.
1)Passing blood through your Urethra is not something to take lightly. I'm not a doctor and to my knowledge none of us are. It is possible you passsed a Kidney stone or you may have a Bladder or Kidney infection. Whateever the problem is it needs to be checked out by the proper specialist. For this problem that doctor would be a Urologist. This is a doctor that specializes in problems of the Uninary system. I urge you to see one as sooon as possible.
2)Your BF comming quickly when you resumed your sex life I believe is a two part situation. Unless he relieved himself during the 2.5 weeks or you helped him with getting off during that time. He was probably very excited. That would be normal and I would think his recovery time would have been quite fast and able to continue and satisfy you on the second round. You didn't say if you two had a second round that night.
Some men find bleeding, menstral bleedig, a turn off and some find it a turn on. Some women are the same way not wanting any sex during their period while other women are super horny. Bleeding from your Uethra of course meant you had to stop.
I think you getting your period while having sex and him then getting thrush has done a job on his mind. It didn't help him that you started to bleed again during your last sexual time together. This is going to take time and reasurance that it won't happen again. So you do need to see a doctor to find out why you bled from your Urethra as it is the only way to reasure him and yourself that it won't happen again.
3) When medically cleared to resume your sex life I would recommend no pressure. If you two are the type to just run in the bedroom tear of your clothes and jump in to bed, don't do that. If you are the type to sit on the couch and seduce each other, don't.
Start with a relaxing evening, may be with dinner out or something you cook. Then let things progress naturally from there. Don't rish things. As things going wrong and feeling grumpy. My only advice is don't set your expectations to high. Expect that things may go wrong and that you may have to be flexible in what you desire as well as encouraging to him.
so like me and my bf are gonna have sex he's like super experienced so what should i do i have no idea . tips on what to say, how to move? detailed the better. any good sites? also all the girls say he's huge and really good. he's 4 years older than me. thanks!!
Woops; Keep your panties on young lady. You say this guy is four years older than you. If you are under the age of 16 or 17. You are under the age of consent in most states, that is if you live in the U.S.
Should your parents or anyone else find out that you are having sex with someone his age and disapprove, which I believe they would. They can send him to jail for many years even life in some states. The charge would be Statatory Rape. Even though you may be willing to have sex with him; being younger then the age of consent you legally cannot consent to having sex therefore he is from a legal stand point raping you. Hence the term statutory rape.
Now if you should be above the age of consent there is the differences in your age. Because he is 4 years older then you and you may be younger than 18, that would make you still a minor. The top charge would be child molestation,
There is no reason in the world why someone 4 years older than you should be looking to have sex with you. This is totally wrong. He should be dating women or girls his own age. To my mind he is, or at least is, a child molester in the making.
By dating girls so much younger than him he is either very immature or unable to relate to people his own age.I am baseing my remarks on the fact that you have not given either of your ages. Which caused me to make some assumptions.
The 4 year age differance tells me this boy is at least 17 years of age or older. By your writing style I'm gussing you are 14 or 15. Your body may be capable of sex but you are really way to young to be having sex. What precautions have YOU taken to prevent pregnancy? You can't depend on him. Condoms are only 85% effective in preventing pregnancy. That is a 2.5 in 10 chance of getting pregnant and contrary to what a boy may tell you. You can get pregnant from your first sexual experience.
If he is as experienced as you say he is; has he been tested recently for HIV AIDS or STDs. Do you want your first sexual experience to infect you with an STD or HIV? Did you even think about asking him to be tested and showing you the test results? Your a virgin it's a pretty sure bet your clean; how sure can you be about him?
I know you don't like what I have written here but I am looking out for your safety. He is not in love with you the way you may be with him. In fact you could be in danger.
My advice is to leave him and find someone else. I would even encoourage you to talk to your parents about him. There is something wrong here. If you were my daughter I would report him to the police and let them investigate. That is how strongly I feel that he is a preditor. Is he or will he hurt you. I don't know and I truly don't want to read in the newspaper that some young girl was hurt by someone 4 years older than her and have to wonder if it was you.
So take my advice: Don't have sex with him, don't go out with him any more and talk to your parents about him before he hurts you or anyone else.
Might sound weird. I'm M/17. I met a 12 year old girl on playstation. I didn't even know how old she was. Its kinda getting annoying and awkward. She emails me once in a while. The worst part is the texting, she texts me like all day. How can I get her to calm down? Without making her feel bad? Like I'll be with my friends or family and I get constant texts. Then its kinda awkward because shes like 12. And a 12 year old texting a 17 year old seems weird. I've known her for about a year too. I don't wanna be mean but...you know...its kinda annoying.
If she does not take please stop for an answer. IF you not responding to her texts does not cause her to stop texting. I see only one other alternative. Being legally blunt with her.
Tell her that her constant texting is not only harasment but could cause you legal problems as her texting constitues a form of relationship. The 5 year age difference between you makes this relationship illegal. To protect yourself you will have to inform her IP provider of this harrasment and she could loose the rights to the web.
I know being this blunt is is hard to do and that you don't want to hurt her. But, there is always that but. There is a legal question her of stalking. Her to you. Plus does her texting of you constitute a relationship? If so you could be in legal trouble if she wre to say something to the wrong person. So either be blunt with her. Tell your parents and let them handle it, or talk to the police and let them handle it.
This is a young girl that seems to have a crush on you. Your legal well being could be at risk here. She needs to stop.
My advice is to talk to your parents and the police. The law and technology are out of step. You need to protect yourself before all others.
I am 16 I want to be an english teacher Is teaching a funny job 2 me
any way I will move 2 high school after the summer vaction .And I think that I should think about my future carrer
I love Eng alot. My native languge is Arabic,and I love eng So wanna be a teacher
But my family refuse (they give the chance to chosse but they keep arguing me about that) saying teaching is very borning and HARD specifically if u teach a middle school students or the grade that less than middle school.And I don't know .Does teaching boring and hard as they say?????
sorry about bad English ;) Anyway thank you very much =)
Is teaching a fun job? I believe teaching is more rewarding than fun although any job is what you make of it. IF you want the job of teaching to be fun as well as rewarding than you have to make it fun.
Here is the states many students thinks the subject of English is boring, after all we all speak it. A boring subject is hard to get across to some students. Making the subject fun for you to teach also makes it fun for the student to learn.
I remember way back in the 5th grade we had to learn the Capitals of all, then, 48 States. Mr. Dorey our teacher made a game of it. Boys against the girls with extra recess time for the winning team. Everyone on each team had to be able to look at the map, name the state and it's Capital. Looking back this game not only made learning these things more fun but it developed team work as well. The game ended in a tie and we all had an extra recess.
So can teaching be fun? I believe the answer to that question is yes. My niece is a elementry school math teacher. She loves math and always has. She loves teaching. What she does not love is the paperwork. Then again every job has something you won't like about it.
i have been married for over 20 years,that has been many ups and downs.i was 45 years old,and she was 19 when we met.our getting together is a story of its own.My question is all through our marriage i have caught her either having affairs with other men,are trying to have an affair with someone.Of course she denys everything but it is very clear to me and anyone who has eyes that it is going on,there is no doubt in anyones mind that it gos on constantly.I think it has lots to do with how she was raised.an other story there too.She was brought up in a home that had no respect for truth,honer are morals.My question is she absolutly knows that i know what she is doing its as plain as night an day.But she will deny any of the relationships until its almost drives me wild.again there is no doubt she is doing this,and she knows i know it,yet she will deny everything until it drives me crazy.this is not an old guy with a big imagination.i could get 10 people to tell you the same thing.she has no girlfreinds,and no other close freinds,i have had women that work with her ask me why she doesn't want a freind.She is very forward with men,she has initionated all her relationships.She does it much like a man does when he wants to flirt are make out with a woman,she does the mans role.If she wants a certain man she will hustle him at all cost,This is a thing that would take writing a book on to understand,but the thing that really gets me is she will lie with out even thinking of the consiqinceses of her actions.She is aware that everyone knows the truth but its like she is thinking,if i do not admit it they will never know the truth.I have called her puyscotic but thats not it,her father was a habitual lier and all knew it including her.He had no freinds in his life and i think thats where her trouble starts,its like someone has taught her that as long as you deny it it is not a lie.This would be a interesting study for a doctor to get into,as you can tell by my spelling i'm not the head of the class but i'm not imagining this it is happening every day.it just blows my mind that when she is caught lying,she will never let on that she was.And one other thing i want to make clear,this is not a jealous husband with an over active mind,this is a true story and a very interesting one at that.if i had room to write of just one incident it would prove what i'm trying to get across.I will try anyway,one night she and another lady were sitting around visiting and talking,She had a phone call,an in minutes she came up with a reason she had to run to the store for something that sounded ridiculous,she left and the mstore was close enough she could have walked,yet she was goned over an hour,when i called her she said she had to go to another store to find what she wanted,I asked where this store was,she was suppose to be in the store looking for her item,we have been living in thism area all our life.she told me the street she was on,but she did not know the name of the store,i was going to tell her where to go are what ever,but she couldn't tell me anything,i said is there anyone in there that could help you.*(By this time i knew what was going on,)she said there wasn't anyoned around that could help her.So knowing what was going on,i started to mess with her,since i knew this was all being made up,she was somewhere with this guy that had called earlier,i mstarted making it hard for her,i said just ask the person at the register ,she said something rediculos,we had already discussed there was no one in the store but her.i asked her serveral things until anyone else would have given up and said ok you caught me,but she would never do that,i let her know that she was not mtelling me the truth,she said mshe was,but she was confused.i could tell that someone was talking to her as we talked,anyway this was getting so rediclous it was ashame,Later after some more looking into this thing,(this is mjust one of many)it came out that she had met this guy at his apartment close by and all the time i was talking to her she was having sex with him.This must be a turn on for her because it has happened many times since.talking to me and having sex woth someone else.Your big,question is i'm sure why am still with this woman knowing what i know??That is a good question but can't be explained in so many ways.i do love her,and i am now 70 years old,i am washed up as going out this late in,life and finding someone else,we have a son now thats 22 years old and he and his wife just had a beautiful baby girl that i am so in love with it is unreal.it would kill my business which she has done my billing and all for years,i would never be able to get into all that and figure whatmis what,there are many reasons i have tolerated it for so long.My health is bad at this time and she is in the medical field,she knows more about my health than i do.there is lots of personal reasons i put up with this,but yet the desire to have her ever come clean and just madmit it is all true is what i would like to see.It has been onteresting for me to see all this take place for many years now,and i just wondered if there are others out there like this and what medical class you would put them in,besides lier.Please someone answer my question,my email address is genostaxi@gmail.com i will be waiting for your answer, THANKS FOR READING MY MESS,IF YOU CAN GET THROUGH MY MISTAKES IN SPELLING MAND GRAMMER.IF THERE WAS A SPELL CHECK I WOULD USE IT,BUT CAN'T FIND ONE HERE. BYE NOW GOD BLESS EVERYONE
I agree with Braiden, tell her to close her legs and stay home or she is out on her ear.
As far as your business concerns are you can hire a business mananger and a good accounting firm. As to your health concerns their are plenty of doctors out there and if you need you can hire a care worker too take care of you.
Surprising as it may sound to you your son and daughter in-law may be aware of your wifes affairs as you are. They probably don't say anything as not wanting to hurt you. You should speak to your son. It may be that he will be willing to stepp in and pick up some of the roles his mother has been taking on.
Most importly though is feeling the way you do about this. Is to speak with your Lawyer and make sure your will is up to date and your Estate is disposed of as you presently wish it to be. Without a will everything would go to your wife.
im 33 male. dated a 28 yr old girl for 1 yr and 8 months. she has a 9 yr old son. broke up this january. we had a lot of petty fights etc as time went on. abt a month ago i entered into a new relationship. she had done so as well (her new bf has been in and out of jail). i told her it was a bad idea and we fought throught text. they broke up and she informed me. last week she texted thanking me for my help as shes finishing nursing school. we have been texting a bit more often nothing ridiculous. texted a lot sunday and i sais i wanted her back. she said come over im lonely and want to have sex w u but no relationship. i did so, and spent the night cuddling, had breakfast etc. i told my current gf that i have feelings for my ex and need to step back a lot. my ex and i went for lunch yesterday. i keep saying ive learned a lot and wed do better. she is resisting my approaches but hints at future sexual meetings or maybe hanging out. i know i want her back but am emotional abt it and she sees it. what do i do??
From one guy to another; your an ass and a player. That does not work today. When you leave a relationship you don't go back for a booty call, I don't care how good the sex is. Your ex is using sex to string you along at the same time is keeping you from having any real relationships with someone else.
Dump the booty call and don't turn back. Find someone you can relate with and not constanly argue with. Every relationship has their petty fights and even a few humdingers. Most of all they have have more respect and love for one another than fighting. This is the type of relationship you want to find for yourself.
Ok so Im 13/f and I came home today hurting alot in my vaginal area. I went to the bathroom and looked at it to see what was wrong and this big rash type thing has grown around my vagina. I have never had sex and Im not sure if its a yeast infection? Well what is a yeast infection? It hurts to change sitting positions and its really irritating. I dont wanna talk to my mom because it could be awkward and I dont want her to look at it if I tell her because that would make me uncomfortable. Is there anything that can help me? I know you cant be 100% sure about this description but,: Its around my vaginal area pretty big and really red. It rises a bit above my skin and is irritating and uncomfortable.
Please help me! Will the rash go away on its own? I looked up pictures of people with the same problems and most people say its a rash. ive never had a rash before. Will it go away on its own? Help!!!
We are not doctors. We cannot and should not make diagnoses over the Internest. Whatever is bothering you needs to be examined to be diagnosed. That means a doctor or nurse has to actually look at your groin area. A scrapping may be needed to tell the doctor exactly what type of infection you have.
As a parent myself I will tell you what is most important to parents. Your well being and safety comes first. Mom knows that you will be embarrassed when you tell her. You shouldn't be. Remember you and mom are built exactly alike. She isn't going to see anything she hasn't seen before. My mother would tell me at these times, "remeber young man I changed your diapers". Yes she did but I had changed some since then and so have you. We understand this and we will not try to embarrass you if we don't have to.
As I said whatever is bothering you needs to be treated by a doctor. You are too young to make a doctors appointment or to be seen by a doctor by yourself. You must, by law, be accombanied by a parent. In this instance I believe you would be more comfortable with your mother accompaning you.
My advice is to tell mom you need to see a GYN. Tell her what the rash looks like and where it is. From your discription if mom needs to look at it she may be able to see what she needs without you taking your panties off. So to her asap.
Does anyone here think they would read a *very, very, very* long question? Will the Advicenators team delete it because it's too long? What id I have to slit it into 2 questions?
Thank you all in advance! I will put the link in additional info for anyone who's interested! It'll hopefully be up in a few days, maybe a week. This question is important to me so I want to know how everyone will react to it and if you'll actually read the whole thing.
Long questions is not the problem. The problem with long questions are they tendd to have run on sentences. They have information not pertenent to your question.
As DangerNerd said fomatting helps a lot. When I respond I like to refer back to what you have written. Proper paragraphing is important. If there is a change in your subject matter, even slightly, start a new paragraph.
Take your time, use proper english. Some of us are older and do not understand today's street slang.
Most of all take your time and reread your question. Make sure it says what you want to say.
There are time when a question will cause me to do some resarch for an answer or I may want to do some more thinking on my answer before I send it. Since I cannot save what I write on this program I use my word program to prewrite my answer and save it until I am ready to answer. You may want to do the same. This allows you to take all the time you need to write your question When you have all the information you need to send us, you copy and paste into our program. This also gives you to use the spell check program within the word program to use.
My parents divorced when I was 15 months old. My mother had custody, while my father had visitation. I remember times not seeing my dad, some because he never showed up free he said he would, other times there was just limited visits. After I turned 5 I completely stopped seeing my father an stepmother. Growing up, I was told my father did this or that, whether my brother and I asked or just information thrown at us. Now I am 27, and have slowly begun to form a relationship with my father. I have had about 4 visits with him in the past year and a half. About 4 months ago I've developed a relationship with my stepmother also. Her and I have become close. My stepmother informed me of my fathers side I the story of why my parents split. Evidentially there were marital issues, therefore resulting in a trial separation, when my mother decided to have an "affair" while seperated and going to counseling. Granted my biological mother and I have always had a tense relationship, but this news made me feel very angry with my biological mom. I questioned my brother on why I had been told, and he confirmed that my mother slept with someone else. I never knew til recently, however my mom told my brother quite some time ago. Since I've started taking to my stepmother my mom has been snooping some and trash talking my dad and stepmother, I assume to continue hiding her secret, as she does not know I am aware of her infidelity. So, my question is do I have a right to be angry with my mother? And how should I approach telling her I know when the subject arises again?
Normally I agree with Razhie. In this instance I'm of a slightly different mind set.
First telling one child and not the other something like this is a cause of concern to me. For it is and issue for anger building not only between you and mom but you and your brother. I am of the belief if one knows the other has to be told. If one is to young to understand at the time then you tell them when they are old enough to understand.
On the other hand your mother has her right to privacy. This happened when you were less than 2 years old. How old was your brother at the time? Was he old enough to understand at the time it happened?
There are a lot of missing pieces here as well. You have every right to have a relationship with your father and stepmother if you so choose. You are 27 now an adult women capable of making your own choices. Your mother trash talking him is just as wrong now as it would have been 25 years ago when you asked for him. Your mother may be concerned she will lose whatever relationship she has with you.
Do you have a right to be angry with your mother: Yes, but not for the reasons you think. If you want to be angry with mom it would be for wanting to keep you from having a relationship with your dad and stepmother. Not for keeping a secret from you. Just as you are entitled to your privacy and secrets from her as you are now an adult. She was and still is entitled to her secrets and privacy with and from you.
How do you approach the subject of your knowledge of her infidelity? Frankly I feel she already knows you know and is by hind her new tirades about your dad. I would suggest that you just let it pass there is no reason to open an old wound and hurt her.
If you feel you must acknowledge your knowing then do so but do so in a manner that is not hurtful or spiteful. What is past is past. We cannot fix the past. We can fix today and prepare for tomorrow and that is what I recomend here. If it does come up you just acknowledge that you are aware of what has been. If she asks who told you. I would recomend you say that it does not matter how you learned of it. That what happened happened. You wished she trusted you enough to tell you but she didn't tell you so there is nothing that can be done about that. You don't think any less of her as it happened long ago, or words to that effect. Which hopefully is true.
Then you remind her you are an adult entitled to make your oen opinions of people. You would prefer that she stopped trash talking your father and let you make your own opinion of who and what he and his wife may be. You can if you wish inform her that you have established a relationship with your stepmother.
What I'm saying is just don't be vengfull with her when it comes up. It to late and there is no reason for it at this time.
Well i don't masturbate and I haven't really done anything sexual but for some reason, when im doing my casual daily chores, i can feel something wet in my pants and i always find out that i had an orgasm and its really embarrassing. i don't know how to stop it and i get really embarrassed and some times it even happens at school and i cant sort it out cuz the teacher wont let me go to the bathroom so i just have to put up with it and im tired of it. How do i stop it?
Both of the other advisors have given you good advice. They are both correct in that you do need to see a GYN to make sure this is not a medical problem and if there is something the doctor can offer you to help you if it is not a true medical problem.
Until you see the doctor I would suggest you or you ask mom to purchase some light days panty liners. This will make you feel more comfortable and save your panties from becoming wet and uncomfortable as well as stained.
One more thing: What you are experiencing is not sexual. It is a biological function of your body. The same as any other biological function just that it happens to be with your reproductive system. You have no reason to be embarresed about it be it talking with you mom or your doctor.
Now if you are are 14 I can offer some advice to make it easier. By Federal Law known as HIPPA IF YOU ARE OVER 14 YEARS OF AGE YOU HAVE MEDICAL PRIVACY WHEN IT COMES TO YOUR REPRODUCTIVE SYSTEM.
This means if you are 14 or over you do not need parental permission to make doctors appointment or to see a doctor for anything relating to your reproductive health. The law is very specific on this and was passed by Congress so that young adults like you would seek medical help with problems or questions concerning their reproductive health.
By law you can see your doctor in total privacy, meaning if mom goes with you she must stay in the waitng room. The doctor cannot and will not examine you if mom is in the room. Anything you say or the the doctor treats you for stays between you and your doctor. Any information about any vist or examination and treatment can only be released upon written request by you to the doctor. A violation of any part of this law by the doctor or staff is punishable by up to 5 years in prison.
So you have no reason to be embarrased. You need to see a doctor; If you would be more comfortable seeing the doctor in private that is your right. So go see the doctor and have this checked out.
What is happening to you sounds very normal for a young teenager going through the hormonal changes of puberty. But I am not a doctor and it is always better to consult a doctor when you have a question like this.
I Want To Know How To Read People Better. I Want Tips Or Techniques That People Use. I Want To Know What People Are Thinking By Looking At Their Face And Their Body Language. Any Help Is Appreciated!
Flare is right, this is not something we can teach you or you can learn over the Internet. It is a learned skill that takes many hours of observation to learn.
As a retired salesman I can tell you it took me years to learn to read my customers and to learn when their objections to something were real or just made up to get me out of their hair so they could move on to something else.
Successfull Poker players are probably the best at reading body language. Many have written books on how to win at poker. Some have even written about how to spot "a tell" as they call it. A little twitch of the hand, raising of the eye brow or maybe a slight octave change in their voice. That tells them when someone is bluffing or has a great hand. Here again they have spent hours studying their opponents to find these littl tells.
You will never really know what a person is thinking. There is no such thing as a mind reader. What you can learn by studying people is when they are not being real with you. This can be very helpful in day to day dealings with everyone from realtors to car salespeople. Someone who is hungry to make a sales is more likely to make a better deal than someone who is over quota for the month.
To do this you also need to learn small talk that will disarm the person your dealing with. This puts them at ease and allows that tell to come through. Check out some of the books Poker players have written and see what you can learn from them.
I have made a resume but I am not sure if it's a bad, good, or great resume.
I have a header with my name, phone number, address, and date of birth.
I have an objective which is one sentence.
I have skills which I listed 12 skills in a chart and I deleted the borders and centered everything.
I have my education.
I have my experience which I listed my last 3 jobs starting with my most current.
I have my volunteer experience which I listed the types of mission work I did with my church over the years.
Lastly, I have 'References available upon request'
Everything looks very organized.
What else should I put into my resume?
Any tips on making a resume great?
Do I need to omit any information?
Thanks!
Without actually seeing your resume all I can say is it sounds good. Get someone to proof read it for spelling, grammar, punctuation and capatalization. A great resume can be ruined with poor writing skills.
If there is a break in your work history explain why. For instance: Left to return to school" at the end of the discription of the job you left to return to school or if you entered the Military.
Try and keep the major points of your resume to one page. Keep the discription of your work history short and to the point. One well defined paragraph is best.
Last would be to add your special interest or hobbies. These would be sports you play,cooking, photography, hiking, fishing, camping and the like. These and your volunteer experience are fine for a second page if needed. The first page should contain all of your important work history. At the very end you put references and special interest and the fact that references are available.
When I was reviewing resumes, my first pass through the stack I looked for clean easy to read type. Ones that were not overly wordy; I was not interested in being dazzeled by BS. If I did not find who I was looking for in the remaining stack of resumes then I would go back and look at the reject pile and resort them. That happened in only a few instances.
Put together a short cover letter to send with your resume.
It something like the following.
Dear Sir, (if name is not known)
Enclosed is my resume for your review. I believe my work experience, the skills I have mastered, will not only meet the needs of your company. (insert name of company if known) They also meet my objectives for new employment as well making me a unique asset and quick starter for you and your company.
I look foward to meeting you in the near future.
Sincerely,
The above is just an example. Make changes that fit your personality as if you meet with someone you have to fit the letter.
I hope this helps.
I asked this question about three days ago and nobody answered it yet and since you are the advice giver being promoted, I thought I'd ask you personally (:
I am 17, female. My brother is 20, his friend is 20, almost 21. Let me start off by saying, I don't even know if he asked me out if I would say yes because I don't think I could do that to my brother. So, for starters, me and my brother's friend are close, I call him my second brother because he is over all the time. Sometimes he comes over when my brother isn't home from work yet and he'll watch tv with me until my brother comes home. My aunt, who lives in Maryland, came home to visit and met this friend and winked at me and told me to date him, my mom told my brother's friend (much to my anger) and my mom said he hesitated and then said "i'm to old for her". The last thing that had happened, my brother's girlfriend just had a big party for her 20th birthday. My brother's friend doesn't drink for personal reasons. About a week before the party, the friend was asking me to go to the party so he can hold a sober conversation. I agreed and we hung out and talked a lot at the party. I then realized I had stayed two hours after curfew, so I called my mom and she said it was fine, so I stayed for cake with everyone and my brother asked his friend if he could drive me home and he smiled and said "oh yea, that's no problem at all" so he drove me home from the party around 3 am. As I was getting out of the car, he said "I'll see you on Sunday for the grad party, right? Keep me company?" (it's his cousin's grad party who is also my neighbor so we will both be attending). Today is, I believe, 1 week and 2 days after the party and him driving me home. Things have been weird. He used to always come in the house and say hello to me and ask how I am doing. He has been over five times since the party and hasn't said hello to me once. I'm not sure if I did anything to piss him off so I haven't said anything to him either. What do you think is going on? Do you think he likes me and that' why he got awkward? Thanks! (This just happened last night, he was over at my house with my brother and he was standing outside of my brother's room as I left the bathroom with just a towel on and he said "oh hey!" I found it weird that he wasn't awkward then and he didn't even try to go into my brother's room so he wouldn't see me, he just kept put).
I don't remember seeing this question. Then agaain it is not the type I generally answer.
I see two problems here neither of which has anything to do with this person being your brothers friend. I really don't think that is a problem and it should not be if your brother trusts this guy.
The real problem here is your age difference, at least for another year. Now this varies from state to state. But in many states you are under the age of consent and you are still considered a child since you have not reached the age of 18. In my younger days we would consider you by a term we used as; "Jail Bait," for there is a Law known as "Statutory Rape. No sex has to be involved but someone 4 years older than you dating you can be in a whole lot of legal trouble for doing so. This may be the reason behind his not asking you out.
As for the other things you write about I really can't speak to them as I have no insight into them. Maybe your brother said something or someone else said something to him. I really cannot give you a reason for his actions.
You might try talking to your brother .