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it is about my wife of over 20 years,i have caught her having affairs
i have been married for over 20 years,that has been many ups and downs.i was 45 years old,and she was 19 when we met.our getting together is a story of its own.My question is all through our marriage i have caught her either having affairs with other men,are trying to have an affair with someone.Of course she denys everything but it is very clear to me and anyone who has eyes that it is going on,there is no doubt in anyones mind that it gos on constantly.I think it has lots to do with how she was raised.an other story there too.She was brought up in a home that had no respect for truth,honer are morals.My question is she absolutly knows that i know what she is doing its as plain as night an day.But she will deny any of the relationships until its almost drives me wild.again there is no doubt she is doing this,and she knows i know it,yet she will deny everything until it drives me crazy.this is not an old guy with a big imagination.i could get 10 people to tell you the same thing.she has no girlfreinds,and no other close freinds,i have had women that work with her ask me why she doesn't want a freind.She is very forward with men,she has initionated all her relationships.She does it much like a man does when he wants to flirt are make out with a woman,she does the mans role.If she wants a certain man she will hustle him at all cost,This is a thing that would take writing a book on to understand,but the thing that really gets me is she will lie with out even thinking of the consiqinceses of her actions.She is aware that everyone knows the truth but its like she is thinking,if i do not admit it they will never know the truth.I have called her puyscotic but thats not it,her father was a habitual lier and all knew it including her.He had no freinds in his life and i think thats where her trouble starts,its like someone has taught her that as long as you deny it it is not a lie.This would be a interesting study for a doctor to get into,as you can tell by my spelling i'm not the head of the class but i'm not imagining this it is happening every day.it just blows my mind that when she is caught lying,she will never let on that she was.And one other thing i want to make clear,this is not a jealous husband with an over active mind,this is a true story and a very interesting one at that.if i had room to write of just one incident it would prove what i'm trying to get across.I will try anyway,one night she and another lady were sitting around visiting and talking,She had a phone call,an in minutes she came up with a reason she had to run to the store for something that sounded ridiculous,she left and the mstore was close enough she could have walked,yet she was goned over an hour,when i called her she said she had to go to another store to find what she wanted,I asked where this store was,she was suppose to be in the store looking for her item,we have been living in thism area all our life.she told me the street she was on,but she did not know the name of the store,i was going to tell her where to go are what ever,but she couldn't tell me anything,i said is there anyone in there that could help you.*(By this time i knew what was going on,)she said there wasn't anyoned around that could help her.So knowing what was going on,i started to mess with her,since i knew this was all being made up,she was somewhere with this guy that had called earlier,i mstarted making it hard for her,i said just ask the person at the register ,she said something rediculos,we had already discussed there was no one in the store but her.i asked her serveral things until anyone else would have given up and said ok you caught me,but she would never do that,i let her know that she was not mtelling me the truth,she said mshe was,but she was confused.i could tell that someone was talking to her as we talked,anyway this was getting so rediclous it was ashame,Later after some more looking into this thing,(this is mjust one of many)it came out that she had met this guy at his apartment close by and all the time i was talking to her she was having sex with him.This must be a turn on for her because it has happened many times since.talking to me and having sex woth someone else.Your big,question is i'm sure why am still with this woman knowing what i know??That is a good question but can't be explained in so many ways.i do love her,and i am now 70 years old,i am washed up as going out this late in,life and finding someone else,we have a son now thats 22 years old and he and his wife just had a beautiful baby girl that i am so in love with it is unreal.it would kill my business which she has done my billing and all for years,i would never be able to get into all that and figure whatmis what,there are many reasons i have tolerated it for so long.My health is bad at this time and she is in the medical field,she knows more about my health than i do.there is lots of personal reasons i put up with this,but yet the desire to have her ever come clean and just madmit it is all true is what i would like to see.It has been onteresting for me to see all this take place for many years now,and i just wondered if there are others out there like this and what medical class you would put them in,besides lier.Please someone answer my question,my email address is genostaxi@gmail.com i will be waiting for your answer, THANKS FOR READING MY MESS,IF YOU CAN GET THROUGH MY MISTAKES IN SPELLING MAND GRAMMER.IF THERE WAS A SPELL CHECK I WOULD USE IT,BUT CAN'T FIND ONE HERE. BYE NOW GOD BLESS EVERYONE
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I agree with Braiden, tell her to close her legs and stay home or she is out on her ear.
As far as your business concerns are you can hire a business mananger and a good accounting firm. As to your health concerns their are plenty of doctors out there and if you need you can hire a care worker too take care of you.
Surprising as it may sound to you your son and daughter in-law may be aware of your wifes affairs as you are. They probably don't say anything as not wanting to hurt you. You should speak to your son. It may be that he will be willing to stepp in and pick up some of the roles his mother has been taking on.
Most importly though is feeling the way you do about this. Is to speak with your Lawyer and make sure your will is up to date and your Estate is disposed of as you presently wish it to be. Without a will everything would go to your wife.
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Give your wife an ultimatum - Marriage Counseling or Divorce
Yes, I am too curious to why you are still married too her? This women is burning you out mentally and emotionally. From the sound of it your wife has been having affairs for a good long time now. Also, She continues to do it because you are allowing her to do it. Sit her down and discuss your marriage status, You tell her your concerns. If she isn't willing to seek professional help and change her ways then file for divorce. I'll be honest but that may just be the best thing you could do for yourself right about now.
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Hello sir,
Is she and, or her father an addict of anything?
(Addicts tend to lie a lot)
I would not think that she would be classified as antisocial if she's not into criminal activities but that's beyond my knowledge. I have seen somewhere that statistically 50-80% of incarcerated individuals are antisocial.
I suggest trying to research the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders(DSM).
I have found that the DSM does not list Pathological liars.
Speak with a professional. May help you hold on to your sanity.
One other thing, I want you to ask her why she loves you. Does her response, in any way, indicate that she understands what love really means?
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