parsimoniousdino's advice column

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Q: I'm sorry this is so long. I just got carried away. I just want you to really understand who I am and my situation, and I didn't know how to be concise about it. I greatly appreciate all help, you don't even know how much

How do you get over that shame and insecurity? I still feel like hiding away from everyone in my own bubble, when that isn't productive. There were periods where I even had suicidal thoughts, but they the cons always outweigh the pros. I just don't know how to get out of my funk. I want to actually experience good things in life, I don't want my life to be ended before I do so

I just finished high school and I just feel really ashamed that I didn't live up to my potential at school and outside of school I hardly had friends, I suppose because I didn't try to conform to anything I didn't like, despite me being moderately physically attractive and being nice and nonjudgmental to everyone. I still don't understand why I couldn't have that teenage experience with a first boyfriend, best friend you have sleepovers with and can share your deepest thoughts, or even get invited to a few parties and other gatherings. Every year I thought this could be reached, but I feel like every year just became worse and worse, since 5th grade. Is it just because I allowed it to, or was it out of my control? I feel like it's mainly my fault

I started going to a therapist but I still don't understand what I did wrong, and I hope college will be better but I'm afraid if whatever I'm doing that's repelling people will continue. The therapist said she didn't see anything wrong with the conversations we were having, so I'm so confused. I don't know if my race had anything to do with it, being black and living in towns that were diverse, but with mostly white and asian people. I don't know if race was important to other people because I don't think that way about other people, and had a few "school friends/acquaintences" of various skin tones. I feel like the best friends I had were in elementary school, which is the only part of my childhood I still feel the most fondly of, and my best friends were Italian, Chinese, German, and a few family friends

I don't know if race was a factor some kids had with who they invited to hang out, as people began to get older, or idk. Anyways, so yeah now I just feel like a mess and don't feel like connecting with others and I spend a lot of time on the internet, too. My mom is concerned and tries to now block computer time (which I hate intensely), but I don't drive, so otherwise my home feels pretty much like a prison, since nowhere around me is in walkable distance. I've basically grown up online, since I was 8, and supposedly that's why I have social issues? I don't know. I don't think I'm socially inept; I think I notice social cues. I love meeting new people and I'm friendly.. but I've rarely felt such a deep emotional bond with others, to where I feel I can just share anything with them. It's easiest for me to do that on the internet, or to a therapist, because it's confidential. I'm like afraid that if I tell people my insecurities it will just give them more reason to abandon me, or look at me with a negative light. So pretty much last year I'd act like everything was fine in my life when I was basically allowing things to crash down. But I didn't want to give people who didn't like me something to look down on me for, so in the end, when it crashed and burned people must of thought it came from nowhere. but then again, why should I care what they think when they weren't my friends? well, because I wanted friends, unfortunately. or at least one. i wish i could have just been like a robot and been really efficient but no, I let stupid feelings destroy me in high school

It's like I'm now afraid of getting close to others because I've been friends with many people who over time, seemed to lose interest in me and stop being my friend. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I'ts not like I'm a boring person.. I feel like people first are excited to get to know me and then the interest fades. Am I supposed to be inviting them to things first? It's so frustrating. I once invited a girl to something we both wanted to see, and even paid for her ticket, but I never heard from her again except her on a few rare occasions, acting like we were friends at school and saying a comment to me.

So I feel like all these years have been a waste and I can't even stand watching sitcoms about teenage life anymore, when it 100% hasn't been like that for me. Teen shows seem to be in some completely different reality. I don't even understand myself, much less other teens. I don't understand why I've been so cruel to myself by doing things against what will truly make me happy.

But I want to succeed in life. Perfectionism has also contributed to my downfall, because it's caused me to procrastinate a lot by going online (for comfort. since I'm not getting invited to social events, it's how I feel connected to the world) in lieu of schoolwork (which is really hard for me because I take very long to do it "perfectly", and have since a very young age). So I just feel like I've let everyone down; teachers, parents, and myself. And I don't know how to come out of it. I really want to make a difference in this world and people have gone through far worse than me and achieved such great things. What are their secrets? How do I get willpower? Cause I feel like I want to do things but then something stops me, and then I just feel guilty and hate myself for it and not even basically crash and burn than doing my best and getting a result that I feel is "less than my personal best".

I just hate being alone. I'm so relieved high school is finally over, but especially last year, for my senior year, I was achingly lonely and music and the internet were where I went for comfort, but I can't go to a dance with an Animal Collective record. I can't go with an internet friend, who lives hundreds of miles away, to a movie. I need to make real friends and FIX my life so I don't repeat these same mistakes in college (and in middle school I thought I wouldn't make these mistakes in high school.. I thought I'd take the smart approach to high school, ugh) and I want to just do things that actually make me happy and will very much HELP my future instead of just screwing over my high goals through my self destructive attidude, just because I didn't have "the teenage experience"

Hi,

Every teenager has their own reality.

Try to strive for progress, not perfection. This will make a huge difference in how you take on your life. Those negative thoughts will become replaced with positive ones. Negative thoughts can cause less brain activity as opposed to positive ones. Think about what your thoughts are doing to your health and the detrimental effects they can have on your life.

The kids that go to parties, have friends, and have a fun teenage life, don't have 'it' any more than you do. Just because you spent a lot of time alone sitting in front of a computer doesn't mean you don't have the same social abilities as those who have been spending time out of the house. Yet, the more time you spend away from people, the more weird you can get. You may not be fully aware of how you come off to people because you are not in touch with their way of thinking.

Many people avoid others that can appear to be a little off. Try talking to yourself in a mirror to get a picture of how you appear to others. Replay a conversation you had earlier that day. Or you could try recording yourself on camera for your own eyes only. Watch and see your body language and think about what message it gives. Do your best to avoid negative thoughts on yourself. Think about improving the message you give to others about you.

Do not fret about failing. Every failure is a step towards success. You have the power to reach success and all those failures on the way aren't even going to matter. Failure can be embarrassing. It can be an embarrassing reflection of you but it doesn't have to be. You have the power to decide what can have an effect on how you appear.

Life is 20% what you make it. Life is 80% how you take it.

It is very important for your mental health to exercise. Start by walking everyday or go join a gym. http://serendip.brynmawr.edu/bb/neuro/neuro05/web2/mmcgovern.html
-see the effects of exercise.

I suggest these websites to learn the detrimental effects of negative thinking:
http://personalpowertraining.net/Articles/how_negative_thinking_can_hurt_you.htm
http://www.cerebromente.org.br/n16/opiniao/seven-ways3.htm
http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/do-you-have-an-%E2%80%9Cant%E2%80%9D-infestation-how-to-deal-with-automatic-negative-thoughts/
http://www.thehappinessinstitute.com/freeproducts/docs/Examples%20Of%20Unhelpful%20Thinking.pdf

Go buy a personal journal and take notes day-to-day. Write down your negative thoughts, write down things you just can't stop thinking about, write down what you would like to change, write down how your thoughts got in the way of what you were wanting to achieve, write down how it can change your outcome if you started having faith and positive thoughts about yourself, and write down anything else that you believe would help you in your progress.

You may have a little social anxiety due to your lack of social interactions. Think about how easy it is for you to make friends online and look at how well you are at socially interacting with people. These skills you can use outside of the internet world. Your emotions when you are around others develop into the atmosphere. If you are comfortable, it is easier for others around you to feel comfort. Look at how others react to what you say. Emulate people that you feel have it easier making new friends.

A lot of times friends grow apart. It happens. Just accept the fact that when you make friends, they may or may not be forever. The lack or change of common interests may cause the parting of a friendship. A lasting friend is rare. When you find a friend that you would like to keep, always try to maintain a connection with them.

You have what it takes. I wouldn't say that if I wasn't certain. You probably heard that acceptance is the first step to getting better. It is. It is key to accept yourself and your imperfections. Strive for progress, not perfection.

-
parsimoniousdino

Q: ok i'm 17 and i always told my parents i didn't want to date and they always told me to tell them when i wanted to start to date, so you know they can meet him an all. the problem is that i want to tell my mom because my parents are divorced and i trust my mom more but when i tried to tell my mom that this guy liked me and that i liked him too her reaction was happy only cause i told her i didn't want to date. so i had to lie because i was afraid pulse my mom has been feeling stressed with work and all the issues we have that i feel i shouldn't say anything but i feel bad for the guy i like hes very nice and is willing to meet my mom.its not his fault i'm too afraid to say anything! someone give me advice i dont know what to do....thanks

Go ahead and tell her. She can handle it. She's a mom. I bet she's been expecting this day to come. Your mother should have the wits to know that you will want to date when you meet the right guy. She even gave you a verbal invitation by asking you to let her know when that time comes. You have already hinted a guy in your life and she didn't flinch. Know that moms know a lot more than they let off. Take a deep breathe and get it over with. You are almost an adult. Your mom must know that you aren't going to be forever under her wing in her nest. It's a big step but it's one you are going to have to make sooner or later.

Q: I am 14 yr old girl and i have had sex. Over 13 guys have naked pictures of me. 5/13 were 18-20 yrs old. Am i concideres a whore.?

Well, there's certainly no going back now but you could change. Do what you want.

Whore:

1. A prostitute.
2. A person considered sexually promiscuous.
3. A person considered as having compromised principles for personal gain.

Definition brought to you by the free online dictionary. So your answer is technically yes. You are sexually promiscuous.

According to this website, it's a fact that sex gives you more pleasure than money. http://www.medicinenet.com/sexual_health_pictures_slideshow/article.htm
This website states the surprising health benefits of sex.

Just make sure the condom is on. I do not agree with scottishgal's advice, the world does not need another pregnant kid. Get on the pill. I also recommend less partners. Pick one really good partner. Enough said.

Q: I completed my FAFSA part of the form. I emailed my mom and told her I needed her to complete her part. She told me that she didn't think to bring the information with her, she's traveling the US right now and will not be back until the middle of August. FAFSA deadline is 06-30-2012! What do I do?!

You can try to file without your parent information.

Best of luck.

Q: How do I make my sew in weave stop itching so bad?

I've had it in for two weeks and it itches really bad. I put all kinds of oil in it, olive oil, tea tree oil, etc, and it doesn't work. I even washed it and it was still itchy. When I wrap it up to go to sleep. I put this long, silky scarf on it to go to bed and I couldn't sleep cause my head was itching so bad and I had to take my scarf off to stop the itching. How can I stop the itching?

You take the scarf off to stop the itching.

Here darling,

http://www.ehow.com/how_8573755_make-weave-stop-itching.html

"..I usually recommend Seabreeze or Listerine."
read on
http://straighttotheroot.com/2009/09/how-to-relieve-an-itchy-scalp/

Itchy weave forum (Teatree may help)
http://www.longhaircareforum.com/archive/index.php?t-172963.html

If those links do not help, I suggest doing your own research. You are among many with this problem.

Cheers,

parsimoniousdino

Q: how i made my virgin girlfriend to have sex with me

No. No. No. No. No.

That is a bad approach.
There is not going to be any MAKING a girl have sex with you. Watch your words. You do not want your foot in your mouth talking to her about this. You ask her what she is comfortable with. Talk about sex with her. Do not pressure her. Do not be a scumbag and take away something very special to your girlfriend only because you want inside her pants.

Cheers,

parsimoniousdino

Q: Ok so Im 13/f and I recently have masterbated (only for about 10 seconds) and my period was supposed to hit like almost 4 weeks ago but I have an irregular period so I wasnt too worried. Today, I went to school and had to do something called "play day" at our school where all the gr7/8's get to lead groups of kids from grades j/k-3 and some ppl get to run events that the groups go to. During the whole thing my vagina and just around my butt area hurt but it wasnt on the inside it was more on the outside. When I got home today, I went straight for the bathroom to take a look. All around my vagina is super red and I dont know what to do! Please help!!! Im not talking about this with my mom or my older sister... Could this be a result of masterbating? I masterbated about a week and a half ago. Its really red and irritating! Help me!

May be..
Sweat Rash
Heat Rash

Check this website:
http://symptoms.webmd.com/#./introView

Q: i have been married for over 20 years,that has been many ups and downs.i was 45 years old,and she was 19 when we met.our getting together is a story of its own.My question is all through our marriage i have caught her either having affairs with other men,are trying to have an affair with someone.Of course she denys everything but it is very clear to me and anyone who has eyes that it is going on,there is no doubt in anyones mind that it gos on constantly.I think it has lots to do with how she was raised.an other story there too.She was brought up in a home that had no respect for truth,honer are morals.My question is she absolutly knows that i know what she is doing its as plain as night an day.But she will deny any of the relationships until its almost drives me wild.again there is no doubt she is doing this,and she knows i know it,yet she will deny everything until it drives me crazy.this is not an old guy with a big imagination.i could get 10 people to tell you the same thing.she has no girlfreinds,and no other close freinds,i have had women that work with her ask me why she doesn't want a freind.She is very forward with men,she has initionated all her relationships.She does it much like a man does when he wants to flirt are make out with a woman,she does the mans role.If she wants a certain man she will hustle him at all cost,This is a thing that would take writing a book on to understand,but the thing that really gets me is she will lie with out even thinking of the consiqinceses of her actions.She is aware that everyone knows the truth but its like she is thinking,if i do not admit it they will never know the truth.I have called her puyscotic but thats not it,her father was a habitual lier and all knew it including her.He had no freinds in his life and i think thats where her trouble starts,its like someone has taught her that as long as you deny it it is not a lie.This would be a interesting study for a doctor to get into,as you can tell by my spelling i'm not the head of the class but i'm not imagining this it is happening every day.it just blows my mind that when she is caught lying,she will never let on that she was.And one other thing i want to make clear,this is not a jealous husband with an over active mind,this is a true story and a very interesting one at that.if i had room to write of just one incident it would prove what i'm trying to get across.I will try anyway,one night she and another lady were sitting around visiting and talking,She had a phone call,an in minutes she came up with a reason she had to run to the store for something that sounded ridiculous,she left and the mstore was close enough she could have walked,yet she was goned over an hour,when i called her she said she had to go to another store to find what she wanted,I asked where this store was,she was suppose to be in the store looking for her item,we have been living in thism area all our life.she told me the street she was on,but she did not know the name of the store,i was going to tell her where to go are what ever,but she couldn't tell me anything,i said is there anyone in there that could help you.*(By this time i knew what was going on,)she said there wasn't anyoned around that could help her.So knowing what was going on,i started to mess with her,since i knew this was all being made up,she was somewhere with this guy that had called earlier,i mstarted making it hard for her,i said just ask the person at the register ,she said something rediculos,we had already discussed there was no one in the store but her.i asked her serveral things until anyone else would have given up and said ok you caught me,but she would never do that,i let her know that she was not mtelling me the truth,she said mshe was,but she was confused.i could tell that someone was talking to her as we talked,anyway this was getting so rediclous it was ashame,Later after some more looking into this thing,(this is mjust one of many)it came out that she had met this guy at his apartment close by and all the time i was talking to her she was having sex with him.This must be a turn on for her because it has happened many times since.talking to me and having sex woth someone else.Your big,question is i'm sure why am still with this woman knowing what i know??That is a good question but can't be explained in so many ways.i do love her,and i am now 70 years old,i am washed up as going out this late in,life and finding someone else,we have a son now thats 22 years old and he and his wife just had a beautiful baby girl that i am so in love with it is unreal.it would kill my business which she has done my billing and all for years,i would never be able to get into all that and figure whatmis what,there are many reasons i have tolerated it for so long.My health is bad at this time and she is in the medical field,she knows more about my health than i do.there is lots of personal reasons i put up with this,but yet the desire to have her ever come clean and just madmit it is all true is what i would like to see.It has been onteresting for me to see all this take place for many years now,and i just wondered if there are others out there like this and what medical class you would put them in,besides lier.Please someone answer my question,my email address is genostaxi@gmail.com i will be waiting for your answer, THANKS FOR READING MY MESS,IF YOU CAN GET THROUGH MY MISTAKES IN SPELLING MAND GRAMMER.IF THERE WAS A SPELL CHECK I WOULD USE IT,BUT CAN'T FIND ONE HERE. BYE NOW GOD BLESS EVERYONE

Hello sir,

Is she and, or her father an addict of anything?
(Addicts tend to lie a lot)
I would not think that she would be classified as antisocial if she's not into criminal activities but that's beyond my knowledge. I have seen somewhere that statistically 50-80% of incarcerated individuals are antisocial.

I suggest trying to research the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders(DSM).
I have found that the DSM does not list Pathological liars.

Speak with a professional. May help you hold on to your sanity.

One other thing, I want you to ask her why she loves you. Does her response, in any way, indicate that she understands what love really means?

Q:

I'm looking for 2 hair colors

My skin tone is like this:

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_ND920tPjWkA/S2Zsqkr6w6I/AAAAAAAAvZ4/5GKZyqv1n10/s320

Stay away from artificial-looking colors and any shades of blonde. Tacckkyyy.

I'm guessing you want to dye your hair two colors.

What I approve:

Dark brown and Chestnut brown.
Dark brown and Burgundy.
Dark brown and Black.

Q: ok, so just to let you know, i am an eleven year-old girl in seventh grade, blond hair, blue eyes,and im petite. my boyfriend, *tyler*, tells me i'm beautiful and funny and that he loves me everyday/night, (i know what you're thinking, oh, how cute!) but he used to have a gf who broke up with him. (she is now my bestie) the thing is, when he broke up with her, he said, (and i quote) 'ill never love again! id be too sad.' so im not so sure if he lied to her or me, and its really confusing. please dont answer by saying, 'you're too young to date!' because i really love this boy. ps: *tyler* is not his real name and he has brown hair, blue eyes, and he is also skinny

He didn't lie to either of you. He meant what he said. It may sound contradicting but he's young. He's not going to know how he will feel the next day or the days in the future. That's how he felt in that moment. He was just upset after the relationship ended. When you are a little older, you will understand a little better.

Q: i am a girl,17.. i think i am addicted to watching porn. I watch porn daily for 5 min. is it bad to watch it? bcoz i feel so, but also i am not able to stop it. I want to stop doing it, pls give me some advice. i am an indian.

Addiction -
"..persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful.."

Many people don't see pornography as any harm to self unless it takes over their lives.
However, it can still be considered detrimental because it creates lust in your heart and because it infects your mind.

Tips to stop watching porn -

Check this website:
http://www.feedtherightwolf.org/2010/05/how-to-stop-porn-addiction-stop-watching-porn/

Your addiction isn't a serious case but quitting a bad habit is always a good idea.

Meditate on how disgusting you think it is and think about its consequences - how bad they are. Think of the worst things you can think of associated with porn. Concentrate on each thought. Tell yourself, "I am not going to watch porn anymore, I hate it."

Pray about it.

Don't be so hard on yourself. It could happen to anyone. You, I, and the rest of the world are all human.

Q: Hi! I am 12 years old and everyone at school calls me ugly! If there is anyone to call me cute or pretty i would personally think they are mental or something just is not right in the brain! I am brown skin and has black eyes and i also am i very spotty person! There are spots in between my eyebrows and some people think i have a uni-brow! all my friends are pretty and it just seems as if i am the odd one out! Every boy that i have liked has seemed to never like me back, ended up insulting me,or just go for one of my friends! How can i change? I do not want to bleach myself or commit sucide! What should i do?

Hey pretty girl[ Yes. I am mental (; ]

Spotty - That's not a bad trait. It's unique. Morgan Freeman has a spotty face. I have a red spot on my face that has been there since I was a toddler. Most of the time it's invisible but sometimes it shows. I'm not sure exactly what it is but I use Maybelline Dream Smooth Mousse over it and my whole face. To cover the spot completely, I use Revelon color stay mineral powder over my blemish and it conceals it completely. I do not always use this method or this makeup. I experiment. So my advice to you would be to go to a local drugstore, mall, or online and try different products until you find one that works for you. Go visit a dermatologist and see if they could help you with these spots. If you have pretty friends then it's likely that you're pretty yourself. You are young and around your age, people are going to say petty things like - You're ugly. You will mature and become a beautiful young woman and guys will start lining up for you. You are a little young to do this but if you have thick eyebrows or if you want to add a little shape to them, go have them waxed. You could add a little character to your face by asking the one waxing your brows to add a little arch to them. Costs $8-$12. You could go get your nails done - make your hands and toes pretty. Try something new with your hair - maybe a new fashion forward cut or style. I think some brown Victoria Secret glimmery eyeshadow will you look beautiful on you. Costs $10. I suggest using black, liquid eyeliner - it may be difficult to apply at first but with practice, you will be making perfect lines. Just trace along your lashes. Only apply to the top and try not to make it look too thick. I use Almay liquid liner - they sell different liners based on eye color. Add black mascara to your lashes. I use Rimmel London mascara. Always wear something on your lips - either lipgloss/lipstick or chapstick. If you can afford MAC makeup, you should get some. MAC bronzer would be a great product to use. Look at what makeup your friends' use and if you like what they have, try it for yourself. Should also look at getting some body bronzer for your arms, legs, chest, etc. Or use moisturizer for your body. Make sure you take good care of your teeth so that you will always have a pretty smile! (: You should be looking glamorous in no time. You are beautiful.

Q: I met a guy who i heard dont like black women but I like him what do i do should i try to convince him to give me a chance and show him that there are good black women out there or just move on i have seen him looking at me so im not sure what to do

You HEARD he doesn't like black women. Did you ever hear him say it himself? People's preferences change all the time but he's not going to not like black women one day and like them the next. It takes time for people to open their minds to new things. You never said whether he was a white guy or a black guy. I have known racist white guys to date black women. I have known black guys that are only seen with white girls to date black women. You can always take the chance to see if you can sway him. There's no harm in that, the worst he can say is No but you would understand why. Give it one try. If that doesn't work, move on.

Q: i always wanted a bobblehead of Sir Elton John but im having a hard time locating it so are there any fleamarkets that sale them or any online stores if so post me a link

Here's what I have found -

http://orangecounty.ebayclassifieds.com/collectibles/garden-grove/elton-john-bobble-head-red-piano-las-vegas/?ad=3999302

Q:
What does it mean when a guy asks you " What are you up to tonight"? OR " What are you doing tonight"? When he has seen you with friends and then he replies back saying " oh okay cool". End of conversation. This can not be a conversation starter because it ended it... :0 I mean why can't they just ask you to do something if they really want. What is up with this?

I mean why do guys ask this question and It can not be a conversation starter because this ended the conversation overall :0

And he is 24 and I am 24 years old as well....so we are not like in our early teens or kids.
He asked me this while he was working after we had talked a bit.

I can barely understand this by the way you had written. Seems like a few important details are missing but I'll do my best to answer.

My understanding would be that he wanted to see you after work or he was thinking about seeing you. He most likely meant it as a conversation starter. He was trying to be subtle. Instead of closing the conversation, you could have texted him a little later. Maybe ask him about work or something you were thinking about. A good time would be after he had gotten off work or right before he got off.

Hope I helped (:

Q: I am a girl(17). I watch porn 3 to 4 times a week. I want to stop doing this. Everytime i watch porn, i feel loads of guilty, but i do the same next time. I was caught watching porn once, but my mom didnt say anything. Please help me......i am an indian

People whom were raised in a morally rich background tend to feel guilt doing things against their own moral code. Porn is a guilty pleasure. You should stop. Who wants viewing pornography to be reflected in their character? Watching porn could lead to sex that in which you may regret. Watching porn is an addiction. You should do everything you can to break this habit. Block the websites. Block X-rated websites and images. Put a note or quote up on your wall or on your desktop that gives you a reason to not view pornography and let it be a reminder to yourself that you can rise above the urge.

Q: Basically, I need to do a piece of art, be it a poem, a song, or a painting, inspired by the Lady of Shalott poem and write about my piece of art. But I don't know what to do. Basically, could you take any aspect of the poem, like Sir Lancelot's role or something, and explain it to me, or just give me some ideas on what to do?
I want to do a poem and a painting and incorporate the poem into the painting, but what about?? Help please...
AJH.

First off - if you don't have a clear or great understanding on elements in the poem, do a little research. You will find summaries, themes, and general information that will give you a better interpretation and may give you inspiration.

http://www.sparknotes.com/poetry/tennyson/section2.rhtml
-I used this source as a reference for my artistic ideas. Look at more than one source to give you ideas.

Ideas that come to my mind - wooden wheel with some wool material hanging off the wheel. The wheel on a canvas or sturdy poster. Above the wheel, to the right corner - paint an antique mirror frame and use maybe broken mirror pieces or perhaps aluminum or something easy to cut. In the center of the mirror, paint a few things she sees in the mirror, 'the shadows of the world' - highway road, which also passes through the fields, the eddies in the river, and the peasants of the town. Or in the center of the mirror paint the knight and write above him - tirra lirra

Or paint a four grey towers and things in the setting around the towers. Make one tower taller - the one she was in and create a window and inside a tiny cracked mirror and web of colors on a loom. To the right side of the towers, create a river and a boat plus a figure resembling a lady in a white robe sailing away from the towers.

"The end of her artistic isolation thus leads to the end of creativity.." "Having abandoned her artistry, the Lady of Shalott becomes herself an art object; no longer can she offer her creativity, but merely a dead-pale beauty.."

Maybe take some colorful wool and glue lines of it from the left to the right of the bottom of your painting... lightly burn the wool on the right before gluing to the painting so that it looks like the beautiful wool transforms into burnt wool. Above that paint on the left side- window of the tower plus the UNbroken mirror - use a miny round mirror you can get at a craft store.. paint the frame. On the right side, paint a pale, beautiful face. Above the face - paint a music note or two and write tirra lirra. Or above the face, put a line from the poem that relates to this idea.

Hope my ideas are any help to you.

Q: What are good nicknames for my boyfriend?

I'm going to refer you to a few websites to help you find your favorite nickname -

1. List of nicknames over hundreds have came up with for their boyfriends
http://listofcutenicknames.com/category/nickname-type/boyfriend-nicknames

2. Nickname Generator
http://listofcutenicknames.com/content/nickname-generator

3. List of Nicknames A-Z below Nickname Generator
http://links2love.com/nicknames.htm

You could also think of a word or phrase and use another language to make your nickname even more sexy. In french, mon cheri - my dear. Say it with a french accent. Sexy, right? (;

Hope you think of something! (:

Q: My boyfriend for 5 years is absolutely fabulous, but we have our differences. His parents are rich and way more formal compared to my living standards and it causes a lot of problems between us. His parents constantly judge my family and I, and push him to break up with me all the time. It gets to the point where they make up exscuses for us to not hangout, therefore we hardly get to see eachother and we are 17. it has been five years and they still wont accept him dating me! He always bails and flakes out on plans we make and it stinks. I come close to just letting them win and breaking up with him because it's like a 6th grade relationship if we never get to hangout and just make phone calls and text all the time, I want that boyfriend who can be there for me all the time and is over constantly. I feel bad for wanting to end it because he truly is a wonderful guy, just his parents are ruining it for us.

what should I doo?? I love him but i dont know if it's worth all the trouble and getting canceled on 30 minutes before every date..

Hi,

Imagine a gay couple and how a mother never accepts her daughter's girlfriend. Eventually the mother will either come around and accept her daughter's choice in love or she will remain forever cold and put pressure on her child to try to control what she can of the relationship. Many couples do breakup because of the parents and their way of making a relationship a hardship. Say you two break up and he dates worse girls, his parents will eventually end up favoring you. You should, if you haven't already, try to bond with his family. You must have some redeeming quality to have that guy hooked. Make a list of things that could win their favor. Try to seek a common ground. It's hard for me to give you my best advice on what you can do to get his parents approval by only knowing that they are rich, formal and judgmental. If they are people with integrity, make yourself a good example. If they are hard-working, pickup a house chore, like putting up dishes after dinner, to show that you like to work. If it's all about class, introduce them to the-closest-to-richest member of your family or even have a distant relative, whom is good at putting on an act, pretend to be rich and talk you up. If they are the type of people that thinks what matters is who you know, the only way to make yourself look better is by having a very good referral. You know his parents so you should have an idea of what you could try in hopes of changing their minds. You and him have made it five years. That's an achievement and proof that you can make it no matter who tries to intervene. You both are almost out of your parents' nests. His parents will not always be able to control him. When he's finally parent-free, his parent's bearings won't be as tough. Many couples have survived situations like this and you can, too. The guy seems worth it. One other thing, you should find out if your boyfriend isn't completely his parents' hand puppet. If he is, that could be a bigger problem. He should be able to stand up to them when necessary and he should try his best to change things.

Q: Hi. So i had a question about this guy that I am in love with. I met him in November and we started getting to know each other. We don't go to the same college but we became very close. and are from the same home town. We then decided that we liked each other and started dating. It went well for the most part but we started fighting over dumb things. One day he was amazing such and amazing loving guy and the next he was a cold heartless guy I didn't know. But in January he was amazing and in a good loving mood and then he went back to school after christmas break. That day he told me he was really busy and couldn't talk as much. This lead to him never talking to me anymore. We would talk (always m texting first) every two weeks but nothing like it was. He then over spring break texted me and things were like they were before, but when he went back to school I got my heart broken again. I've never been so heart broken and in love with someone. He never gave me a reason why he stopped talking to me which really messed me up. I decided to do my best to ignore my feelings for him. It was his birthday Friday and I didn't text him. He texted me at night and we were talking. He kept saying he wished he could see me in a bikini and out of the blue he said he was talking to a girl who never pleasured herself and asked if that was weird. I said not everyones open to talking about it. and he was like yeah no every one loves it like you ;) i joked it off then he kept asking me to talk about it. He would of NEVER brought something like this up before. I told him off once and for all. I said his friendship meant a lot to me and by him going so long in silence and then finally contacting me and bringing this up shows it meant nothing to him so i don't want it anymore. He never answered. Can anyone help me figure out what he was thinking in texting me that? Did i Do the right thing? I miss and love him. what do i do now?

Thanks sooooo much in advance for any advice! :):):)

Hello,

The guy doesn't feel the same. It happens. Not every relationship is mutual no matter how much we wish it. Him talking to you one day and not talking to you the next indicates that he was just toying with you. He may have had mixed feelings about the relationship. He spoke to you when he was in the mood for companionship and you were probably his entertainment when he was bored. He needs to get a life. He texted you out of the blue about the girl because his conversation with her made him think of you. It humored him. If you were somebody's special someone, you would know it. You need to move on, this guy isn't going to give you what you're worth. You are special and you need to find a guy that knows that. That guy is exploring his options. You don't want to be the girl he falls back on because he can't settle for any other girl. If you want to have him running, send him a picture of you in a bikini but I think it's stupid to want a guy that put you to the side no matter how wonderful he seems. Shop around and pick you out something better (; Hope I could be of any help to ya.

bio

"Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist." - George Carlin

My name is Melody.

I like helping others and I hope I can be a help to every person I answer.
If anyone has a question, ask anytime.