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Q: Why does the Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor SSRIs which is an antidepressant could possibly cause suicide? I've been diagnosed with depression and I've been taking seropram(SSRIs) for the past 6 months. I haven't asked my doctor about it yet I've read a black warning that it says the possible suicide attempt. I'm 17 and I don't know why it does cause suicide attempts when it is an antidepressant. I'm afraid I might think of it. I'm confused. Please do help me and let me understand. thank you.
If you were going to have an adverse reaction, you would likely have already had it.

I know when I was on SSRIs I attempted suicide several times. For me, it was because they made me manic (I was misdiagnosed with depression, turns out I have bipolar disorder). People in a manic state are more likely to attempt suicide.

If you are concerned, you should talk to your doctor next time you see them to ease your mind. Every medication comes with its risks - your doctor will have evaluated those risks and decided that you will be fine.

Q: Do you have to be very good at math to take on the course BS in Electrical Engineering??
I just enrolled on a university and I chose the course BSEE. Im kinda nervous about my math skills. Im not that very good about math.
I'm going to warn you that electrical engineering is the most math-intensive of all the engineering types (I'm currently in an electrical engineering program). There's a lot of calculus involved - really, it's mostly math. That said, there are tons of resources in university: your school may have a math help center or peer tutors, or you can work with friends to grasp concepts.

Engineering in general is pretty math-heavy. I would echo Adviceman's advice and suggest that you meet with your course co-ordinator or academic advisor to discuss your options and what supports you would have.

Q: Why isn't there a pro average BMI movement? Nothing good comes from being underweight, overweight, or obese. Personally, I'm overweight, and trying to lose weight to put me less at risk at developing type 2 diabetes, which I am genetically at high risk for. All the fat acceptance stuff and "size 14 is not fat" stuff pisses me off because it's literally life or death for me, and likely many others. I'm a size 8 and even my doctor says I need to lose weight or I'll have to start taking meds. Ive lowered my blood glucose, but being overweight still puts one at risk. I still have issues with junk food, but I'm better now that a lot of junk has calorie labels that discourage me some. Trying to be less of an emotional eater. It's more than whether curves are sexy or not. Someone can be skinny and still curvy, anywyays. Candice Swanepoel and a 90s Tyra Banks, for example, are curvier than my size 8 self. I don't get what positivity comes through fat acceptance, whatsoever. Yeah we're being complacent about our health, high five! It's all down to diet and exercise, we can't wonder why there's an obesity epidemic and simultaneously accept obesity. It's not that obese people should go die or something, everyone can lose weight. I gave up junk food for lent and went to the gym 2-3 times a week and in 1 month I lost 10 pounds. Even models lose weight, the whole "naturally skinny" thing is a myth. It takes dedication, and in time, you'll get used to it. I'm still getting there, and I'm not hopeless, and no one should be, to the point where they consider their health flaw a source of empowerment.
Fat acceptance isn't about being complacent about your health - in fact, it actually promotes the opposite.

In fat acceptance, or health at every size (HAES), people are encouraged to take charge of their health without tying it to a number. There have been a number of times when I've had very unhealthy behaviour (extreme dieting, etc) suggested to me for the sake of losing weight. Once I stopped focusing on losing weight and started focusing on my health and overall well-being, things got a lot better. I don't punish myself for being fat by restricting my food intake to an unhealthy degree and I'm healthier than ever, despite being at my highest weight ever.

It is possible to be healthy and fat. I eat healthy food for the most part, and I'm more physically active than most thin people. My non-weight related numbers are well within the healthy range and I feel good mentally and physically. I accept the fact that I am fat, just like I accept the fact that I have brown hair. As a person who follows the principles of fat acceptance, I give myself permission to exist in the body I exist in, and to enjoy living the way I live.

Your doctor has said that you need to lose weight for medical reasons; heck, if I was told that being fat was contributing to me being ill I would definitely do something about it. Until that point, I don't see why people should treat me as less than a person (ironically enough).


Some more helpful and probably unwanted advice - you probably shouldn't post questions asking for someone else's perspective, then berate them for having that perspective. You do you, by all means. I'm going to continue to do what's right for me.

Q: I was curious to know if you would be willing to help me with something. The gist of the situation is that I'm dating a bisexual guy that has never been in a relationship with a guy. We've been together a year and he says he wants to be with me for the rest of his life. Although he said that, I felt he wasn't being completely honest. I was right; he's 98% sure and 2% of him is wondering what being with a guy is like. He has explained to me his attraction and he has had that attraction since eight years old. I know this is weird asking you. I don't want to give him up but I don't want 98%. I want him to know. Have you ever had thoughts like his?
It is definitely possible to be bisexual and 100% devoted to your significant other.

I am what I would probably consider pansexual, but identified for many years as bisexual. I am also happily married and monogamous.

Being bisexual doesn't mean that you aren't capable of committing fully to any one person because you'll always be jonesing for the other genitals. This is a common misconception. All that it means is that you have a greater scope when it comes to who you partner up with.

I'm sure you've been attracted, even briefly, to other men. Does that mean you're only giving your boyfriend 98%? Not at all. Being attracted to someone or having curiosity doesn't mean that you're not completely "in" your relationship. He might be 2% wondering what it's like to be with a guy, sure. That's pretty common, though, even in a happy, healthy relationship: you wonder what it's like to be with another person but you're not about to sacrifice something great for the sake of curiosity. I challenge you to find a guy who hasn't considered what it's like to be with someone other than his current wife/girlfriend.

Q: It's annoying and inaccurate. That skinny teenager likely had parents giving her balanced meals and shuttling her to and from expensive sports teams all her life. Not to mention the other aspects that affect weight and general development, like the effect of stress, and etc. I once had a coach that said our high school bodies would be the best we could ever attain. I'm a recent graduate, and that's one of the things that motivates me at the gym. I wasn't my healthiest in high school, and had many things stressing me out, leading to a lot of stress eating. I was actually my healthiest when my family first moved to America, 15 years ago. Then the "America effect" happened to my whole family. We're still in the process of combating it. It's annoying how on one hand America promotes cheap, big burgers, and on the other, skinny women in most forms of advertising. A horrible combination being those Carls Jr commercials, where women as skinny as Paris Hilton pretend to enjoy high calorie burgers all the time.

I've never been obese, but I never had the supposed miraculous "teenage metabolism" I so often hear about, so it annoys me to hear it from that perspective. For the most part, my family eats home cooked meals, and I would normally eat healthily at lunch, with a cookie or something once or twice a week at most, but a lot of my peers could get away with eating junk food every day and being very slim, and yet I'm looked at as the one out of shape, even though we're on the same school sports team, and I've done sporty things from a young age.

Anyways, my issue with that leads to how society nowadays is so accepting of becoming obese. I go to Khols after working out at a gym for 2 hours, and hear "All About That Bass" and it just makes me roll my eyes. I'm a size 8 dress size, but I'm still very close to becoming obese, and I need to shed a lot of weight. So why promote a size 14 dress size, however normal it is? Why should we promote something that leads America to have the highest medical bills in the world? The highest rates for cancer, heart issues, etc? Just for looks? Cause on the other hand, being really skinny is also unhealthy, but really skinny models are everywhere. I tried seeing a trainer at my gym and he didn't understand why I didn't want to look "fit and muscular", and instead wanted to look "skinny fit", like a Victoria's Secret model. I mean, he's a guy, so maybe that's why he's kind of out of touch, but still. He said he didn't like the "bony" look in women but I want to look good for myself. If a guy doesn't like the figure I'm trying to pursue, he's not for me. It's just frustrating that I say I want to look skinny fit and he interpreted what I said as some kind of eating disorder. It's like he doesn't know the body a normal woman dreams of, which is more like Candice Swanepoel's than Jillian Michael's, to be honest. Not that anything is wrong with Jillian, she's actually a great example of someone who got to her ideal figure after high school, but hopefully you get what I mean. I mean, women should be free to aspire to any healthy figure, but healthy doesn't mean obese just as it doesn't mean anorexic/bulimic.

Excuses like "I'm just big boned" or "Everyone just has different bodies" just piss me off cause we're all malleable humans. Yeah, adults can't grow taller, but our weight and muscle mass is fully within our control. It might be difficult, like for the rare person with a thyroid problem, but it's not something you have to be genetically blessed with and it's weird for trainers and people in general to give that pessimistic and inaccurate impression to people.

This country is very awkward! It's been 15 years and I still feel like an alien, at times. I'm not really sure how to interpret what it means for me personally to be an American, even though I spent a lot of my formative years here.
** Note ** I use the word "fat" as a descriptor quite often in this answer. I know it carries a lot of weight (haha) as a derogatory term, but I'm using it as a descriptor. Just like people are tall, short, blonde or brunette, people are fat, thin or average. Not an insult.

I think that the thing that everyone tends to forget about is that people are different. Your experience is not the same as my experience. So while your opinions may be valid for your particular life experience, they may not apply elsewhere. Personally, I was always a little heavier, even when extremely active. My fighting weight was 170 lbs and a size 12-14, but my happy weight seems to be somewhere around 220-240 lbs and a size 16-18. Right now I'm above my happy weight, trying to find a good balance.

I am a big (literal and figurative) advocate of health at every size and size acceptance. This can mean different things to different people, but here's what it means to me:

Size acceptance emphasizes that I am no less a human being just because I am technically obese. I am no less deserving of love, care, safety or happiness than someone who is of average size. I deserve the same opportunities, within reason, at a size 20 as a person who is a size 2 (you know, I don't expect to be a VS angel any time soon). Sounds pretty reasonable, right? But it's not how things tend to work on the upper end of the BMI scale. Fat people are told that we NEED to lose weight. We NEED to go on diets that may not be safe. We NEED to adhere to punishing workout routines that push us to the point of injury. We need to do this in order to be thin, because thin is desirable. Comfortable in your own skin? Forget about it. That's for thin people. So fat people are often downtrodden and suffer from low self esteem.

Health at every size means taking good care of yourself, regardless of where that lands you on the BMI scale. Personally, my ideal figure is the one in which I'm not limited in what I do. I don't want to be limited to eating dry lettuce and boiled chicken 2 times a day, but I don't want to be unable to hike 20km a day either. I don't want to be too tired to go for a run because I'm not eating enough, but I also don't want to be too lethargic from eating junk food all day. I really don't think that's unreasonable. Heck, I eat healthier food and am more active than many of my teeny-tiny friends. My blood pressure is spot on 120/80 and my cholesterol and blood sugar are well within normal bounds. Is that not healthy? How am I any less healthy than my 120 lb friend who lives on poutine and bagels?

I agree that there's a pessimistic attitude being passed on, but I would argue that it's different from what you're seeing. You see a society telling fat, unhealthy people it's not their fault and that they're stuck that way. I see a society telling fat people that being fat is a death sentence, and that you might as well give up hope unless you're willing to punish yourself thin. Then you get people wondering why they should eat healthy foods and exercise if they're not losing weight (because it's very possible to have a higher body weight with healthy practices, depending on genetics and other factors). Rather than people eating healthy food and moving their bodies for the sake of feeling great and having fun, they're doing it as a sort of penance for being fat. It's pretty messed up.

I once lost 60 lbs in 3 months. I went away from home to work for a summer, and was miserable. I was homesick, bullied by my coworkers and was struggling with mental illness. I stopped eating as a way to regain some control over my situation. I came home looking "great" and feeling worse than I've ever felt before. So yes, it's possible to change your physical shape, but often at the expense of your mental shape. Dieting is not a healthy way to be. Exercising compulsively out of a fear of being fat is not a healthy way to be. Taking care of yourself, body and mind, regardless of how it makes you look... that's a healthy way to be.

So there's my perspective. It doesn't jive with yours, but that's a good thing. Sometimes it takes seeing through the eyes of others to adjust how we look at ourselves.

Q: Personally, I have been very miserable all of my life. I have suffered from OCD as long as I can remember. I moved from New York to Florida when I was five years old. It was very traumatic for me. I have tried to commit suicide, but I just ended up in a mental institution. I do see a psychiatrist, but she does not help me. In fact, I only see her for the medication. I am absolutely miserable right now, especially with my job. I decided that I will no longer give any types of hints about suicide because I don't want to end up in a mental institution again. That did nothing to help me. I am going through preparations (getting my house ready, cleaning, trying to pay off bills).
I know that being suicidal and having OCD can be a double whammy - you can't stop thinking about suicide, even if you don't want to think about it, so you feel even worse. The key, I've found, is to break the cycle. This is where mindfulness comes into play. Mindfulness involves considering your actions before acting, and thinking about whether you should go through with them or not. If you catch yourself going into a downward spiral of self-loathing or suicidal ideation, you have to recognize it and interrupt your thinking pattern.

You can achieve this in lots of different ways. Exercise is one that has been highly suggested to me; really intense exercise doesn't leave much energy for thinking. Do something that involves thinking, that doesn't let you zone out: bake a cake, go out with a friend, do jumping jacks. In a very worst case scenario, I was taught by a past occupational therapist of mine that sticking your head in a bucket of cold water for a few seconds can really help. It sounds weird, but the shock of cold water and the forced breathing control that comes from being underwater can help to disrupt patterned thinking. Any good therapist should be very familiar with mindfulness training and should have some recommendations for you.

If things aren't working with your therapist, you should let her know. It can be awkward, but there's no point in continuing to go if the work you're doing now isn't helping. It may even be time to check out a different therapist. Different therapists use different techniques, so it's not a one size fits all thing.

I know that even when things are going well it can be hard not to deal with suicidal thoughts. Life can be lived with mental illness, and it can be lived well. I strongly suggest that you form a good support system. That can include relatives, friends or even peer support online. Other people (myself included) have been through things like you're going through. It is possible to keep going and to enjoy life despite our differences.

Q: i recently asked a question on how to get your questions posted on this site again as in getting it to a user as a private questions or to the open forum for everyone to answer i hope you dont reject this question and surely you can do something like that i hope you respond to this one Ninjaneer becuase this question is about getting to use this site for advice again .
Anyone can be a member... It's free. However, if you've been banned from the website for some reason that would be up to Danger Nerd to determine whether or not you can start posting again. I've been here for a while, but I don't have any say in how the website operates.

Q: Hi my parents finally found out that I want to be tested for being bipolar. It runs in my family and my emotions have been like a roller coaster since I was little. I'm kind of happy that I can get help, but Im scared. Like scared to the point were I would say I'm not going and wouldn't cooperate. And the thing is I don't know why! I've wanted help for so long but now that I can get it I'm terrified. I guess I'm afraid the medicine is going to change who I am and I've done some reasearch and the side effects are kinda bothersome to me. I dont know. Has any one ever been screened before for it and is now on the medication?
It's pretty scary. One thing to be grateful for is that you do have knowledge of a family history and can make an educated decision to monitor your mental health before things get beyond your control. This will make things so much easier for you.

There's no official test for bipolar disorder. A diagnosis is reached based on family history and symptoms being experienced. Lighting quick up and down emotions aren't necessarily an indicator; it's more about long-term patterns. You may be asked (and probably should, anyhow) to keep a mood diary where you track your mood and other factors like sleep, energy levels and events in your life. This can help patterns to emerge and can help you to maintain your mental health.

When it comes to medication, there is no one medication. There are lots of different meds and combinations of meds with different ways of working and different side effects. It took me years of constant tweaking to get on a medication regimen that works for me, and it only does a small part of the work. The rest is all about proper nutrition, exercise and maintaining a regular sleep schedule. Your doctor may ask you to change a few things about your lifestyle before putting you on a medication. If you are put on a medication, it may take some time to start working. The side effects can be nasty sometimes, so ask your doctor any questions you may have. It also may not be the right one for you; I had many medication changes and dosage adjustments. Be sure to stick to your guns and let your doctor know what works and what doesn't work for you.

The big thing when it comes to bipolar disorder is self care. It's really easy to let that slide when you're in one of your extreme moods, and that can make things much worse. Avoid caffeine and street drugs. Make sure to eat a healthy, balanced diet. Try to go to sleep at the same time every night, allowing for 8 hours (going without sleep for more than a week sends me rocketing off into mania). Exercise moderately, even if you don't feel like it. Most importantly, know yourself. Learn your patterns and what works for you.

It can be overwhelming living with bipolar disorder, but it is possible to live a full, productive, happy life. It can be tough to get the help you need, but the earlier you catch these things the easier it is; you don't want to go through all this while in crisis.

Q: I want sex with my boyfriend but I'm lucky if I get a kiss of him. Im a girl and I only got my first bra today and I'm not finished with puberty I've snogged and my ex showed me how to have sex but he left my school my other ex dumped me for two girls in my class. My boyfriend isn't that serious and I want more but the ex that is still in school won't go back out with me.
I don't like to tell people that they're too young to have sex, because all that does is make them want it more. What I will say is that it's hard to see the consequences of having sex when you're very young. There are physical and emotional reactions, and you want to be sure that you're ready for them.

I'm sure you've heard about the risks of pregnancy and STIs in school; be warned that nothing can 100% prevent pregnancy or STI transmission. If you are going to have sex, you have to be ready to obtain multiple forms of birth control (chemical, like the pill, and barrier, like condoms). You would also need to feel comfortable discussing these choices with your partner.

Your first time will be more emotional than physical. It's often not that pleasurable for a woman her first time, so this is where it's important to have a really strong connection with your partner. You want to be sure that he won't hurt you after the fact. Since you say that he's not that serious, I would recommend that you hold out until you are with someone who takes your relationship seriously, someone who values you as a person.

I remember being your age and wanting to have sex. It's perfectly normal to be curious and to want to grow up faster. You have so much time to grow up in, though, and it's a shame to rush through it all only to have regrets later.

Q: I'm not here to judge anyone by their response but how many parents believe in smacking their children on the butt with a belt or paddle when they're bad? Growing up I had this done to me and always wondered if it's right or not and where other people stand on this issue.
I'm not a parent, but I grew up with spankings and the belt as a kid.

I think there's a time and a place for corporal punishment. For example, you can't reason with a screaming two year old who's trying to do something that will seriously hurt them. I think a couple of bum smacks isn't a huge issue in a case like this.

Personally, I do think that any physical punishment for a child who is of a reasoning age is not productive. All that I learned was to be afraid of my father, and that hitting is a reasonable way to deal with someone who isn't doing what you want them to. Somehow my parents were surprised when I went on to hit my younger sister when she didn't behave while I was watching her.

The other issue is that it's really hard to regulate when certain things are allowed and others aren't. If it's okay to hit a child on the behind, how hard? How many times? With what? It's a really gray area so it's easier to just err on the side of caution and outright ban it.

Q: I didn't do so good on my report card this semester. I know I am really smart and if I just study I could be getting straight A's. But honestly studying is such a drag! I can't do it for anything. If anyone has any ideas of how I can make studying fun, then I would love that! Thank you!
Studying may not be fun, but there are ways to motivate yourself.

It's important to have a good study space. Many will say to have a quiet, clean space with no distractions. This may not be the case for you. Find out what works. Try studying on the couch, on your bed, on the floor, in the library, in a cafe. Study with music, without music, in front of the TV, with friends, alone. Figure out what works for you. It's different for everyone.

Scheduling can be a great tool. I like to tell myself I'll study a certain subject for a certain amount of time. I use planning tools (like Google Calendar) to block out the time that I will use after estimating how much time I will need to cover that subject. That ensures that the time I am supposed to spend studying isn't spent goofing off, and also ensures that I get some free time to enjoy myself instead of bashing my forehead into my textbooks.

I generally motivate myself with rewards. One tactic I've used in the past is small snacks like chocolate covered raisins. Finish a question, get a raisin. For larger-scale motivation, I also find that withholding things I like until I've finished a set amount of work is good. You can actually get apps that lock your devices for set amounts of time. If I would rather be playing video games, it helps to know that I'm not allowed until I've finished all my homework. The less procrastinating I do, the more fun I get to have after the fact.

I strongly suggest that you look into what type of learner you are as well. I'm sure you've heard of the 3 main types: visual, auditory and kinesthetic. I had a lot of trouble until I learned that you can be a blend of multiple types. Figuring out how you learn best is a great way to make studying more fun. I'm a visual-kinesthetic learner, so I find that I learn best by doing things or by writing things down. If I just read I don't learn anything, but if I take down notes or do an experiment I'll have it down forever. I still remember a note that I had to memorize word for word back in grade 8 - I'm 27 now and can recite it back no problem because my friends and I created a series of hand motions to go along with it. Read up on study suggestions for the different types of learners and try out the ones that appeal to you. You may find that you learn best when you put your information to music, or that you do really well when you walk around while you study. It's important to take this into consideration, because it'll help you for years to come.

Q: Hi! I'm a 13 year old girl in Year 9/9th Grade. It's coming up tovmy options now and I really want to be a Primary School teacher. I love kids and really want to give them the best starts in life.

But, the problem is, nobody wants to support me and always has to be a complete a** whenever they can about it. Not even my dad! Because he's a police officer, he thinks he's all high and mighty and below all other people. Please bear in mind that he has treated me like a trophy all my life, think of the embarrassment he would have to endure if I became a Primary School teacher! That was sarcasm by the way...

My friends all want to become doctors, vets and lawyers and always say that that is where all the failures end up. After all 'those who can't do, teach. And those who can't teach, teach at Primary.' Again, sarcasm.

But I really want to do this! I get straight A's in Year 9 and it's just over a quarter of the way through the year. I believe I can do it but everybody hates my decisions and always have to bring me down about it. It is actually starting to make me feel depressed now.

Any advice? Thanks in advance.
What they don't tell you when you're in school is that you really should enjoy what you do for a career. You will spend the majority of your time working when you're an adult, and hating your job will make your life terrible regardless of how much money it brings in.

People always have something to say about the job choices of others. What they tend to forget is that we need all types to make the world go 'round. If everyone was a doctor or lawyer, then who's supposed to teach their children? Who will snake their pipes? Who will build their houses? No one career is better than any other.

Everyone needs to balance the financial and emotional aspects of their career choice. Some may be happy with working a job where they hate what they're doing but make great money. Others may prefer a lower income but more flexibility and a job that they love. It's a choice we all make, and it looks like you're able to be realistic about it.

Parents are another thing. They want the best for their children, but don't always realize what that means. My parents were pretty upset when I left university to go to college, but now that I'm looking at graduating with great job prospects in a field that I love they're starting to come around. Your parents, much as they may want the best for you, don't have to live your life... you do! They can make decisions about whether to back you or not, and you'll have to live with the consequences of those decisions. That can suck. The freedom of doing what's right for you is its own reward and will have long-term payoffs.

I also wouldn't stress too much about it right now. You've got some years to go before you graduate. I was pretty darn sure what I wanted to do when I was your age, and am now in a completely different field. Your tastes may change with time and exposure to different things.

What I would try to do if you can is get some classroom experience. My high school offered a co-op program where you could get credits for doing a volunteer work placement. Many students worked at elementary schools in the area. You could also look at volunteering with a day care or your Sunday school if you go to church. Find out all that you can about what you plan to do, and you'll be less likely to take others' half baked ideas into consideration when making your decisions.

Q: For starters im a 14 year old girl and my physical body is a female one. I feel like I'm in a male mindset but I have no desire to change my body. I want to be a boy but I want my girl body. Is there a word for this or am I just weird? I know that you can be bisexual and like men and women (Im bisexual by the way if that changes anything) but can you be big ended where you just dont have a gender or you're a mix of both? I'm not sure how to explain how I feel and can't talk to anyone because my friends wouldn't understand because they're all heterosexual and comfortable in their bodies and I don't think that I can talk to my parents because I'd likely be told "God made you this way for a reason" (which is my mothers response whenever I bring up people with tatoos or dyed hair; they act like modifications are taboo) or I'd be told "it's just a phase". I know that it's not a phase because Ive felt this way for a long time. I just don't know. Any advice to help me organize my thoughts?
There's a whole huge spectrum out there when it comes to various sexualities and genders. While the cisgender world is pretty much hard-defined (you're a man or a woman) it's possible to fit in anywhere in between or outside these definitions.

Physical gender (the body you're born with) can be different from your gender identity (the one you feel like) which can be different from your expression (how you choose to present yourself). All of these have nothing to do with sexuality, which is completely different.

From your description, you may identify as genderqueer; neither a man nor a woman. You may also identify as gender fluid, meaning that your gender identity changes with time.

However you choose to identify and present, you are you. You may change with time, but that doesn't make you any less yourself.

Q: it's kind of sad now, now the former and current 'popular kids' dominate social media, being so public about their lives and carefree. i go on the internet to escape that bullshit, but now it's everywhere, with sites like facebook, twitter, and instagram.
I think all of us have fallen into the trap of feeling lame and uninteresting when we see the social media pages of others.

Whenever I get to feeling like a boring homebody, my husband always reminds me that social media is like a museum or art gallery. Those pictures are carefully taken and curated with the intended effect of showing everyone how happy and fun that person's life is. Nobody's going to post pictures of the times they spend on the couch watching TV by themselves, or the times they spend doing homework. What you're seeing is an illusion; all those happy, cool kids have to deal with all the frustration, sadness, boredom and morning breath that you do.

The great thing about the internet is that the weird kids haven't been pushed out; it's easier than ever for us to connect!

Q: Is it preferable for women who have vaginal problems to use menstrual cup during menstruation?
As a devoted fan of the Diva Cup, I can say that it can definitely be preferable to use menstrual cups, especially as an alternative to tampons.

Personally, I find that they are cleaner to use once you get past the initial ick factor. Being made of medical-grade silicone, there are no bleaches or fragrances to worry about. I love being able to go worry-free for 12 hours at a time.

Since you say you have vaginal problems, it might be best if you were to talk to your doctor at your next visit to make sure it would be okay.

Q: I'm 16/f. This weekend I am going to smoke weed for the first time. I'm going to a party with my boyfriend who has smoked weed for over a year and im excited for the party. I love drinking and just having a good time. This party I'm gunna try weed though. Probably a rolled one so its like a cigarette. But I don't know the first thing about smoking. How do I smoke? My boyfriend said he would show me but I wanna have a little more intelligence on the matter. Please tell me all you know
Since marijuana use is illegal in many places, we can't give you advice on its use, regardless of our personal opinions on it. To do so would endanger the site.

Q: Does anyone know what i can make at home to get me off? I want to try anything new other than my hand.
You've had some interesting responses so far, but I felt like I needed to chime in with the safety talk:

Please don't insert anything into yourself without using a condom! Sex toys are made of materials that are easy to clean for a reason. Bananas aren't easily sterilized, plus they can be rough and may cause abrasions. If whatever you're using is porous or has cracks in it, you'll want to make sure that you're not putting yourself in danger.

Q: My puppy has diarreah really bad. What can I do to help her get better soon?
Especially depending on the size of puppy, it's very important that you take her to a vet when she has diarrhea. Small dogs get dehydrated very quickly, so medical intervention is important.

It could be any number of things. Take your pup to a vet, and they can do tests to check for parasites and infections and give you proper medical advice.

Q: To be honest I feel like a prisoner.
My parents sort of force me to do sports, like they just sign me up each year without asking if I'd LIKE to do it. They ask also force me to alter serve, and I don't believe in that stuff anymore, because I'm bisexual and the bible is against that so...........
And I remember my mom forced me to do dance even though I hate dancing I cried that I didn't want to do it but she just yelled that I had to, and the only reason she wanted me to do it was because my friends were all doing it. It got to the point where I'd refuse to go and misbehaved so I got kicked out (I was younger) another thing she forced me to do is band,I decided to try for a year and she wouldn't let me quit when I decided I didn't like it. I want to learn gymnastics, maybe be a cheerleader, but she won't let me, she shamed me for it.
I tried to tell her I didn't want to do alter serving anymore but she got all bad and even got OTHER people (a nun, a couple of priests, random strangers) to subtly convince me to keep doing it. I overheard her reveal it to a family member. I didn't tell her the golden reason why I wanna quit because I don't think I'm ready.
I am going to respectfully disagree with adviceman regarding sexuality.

There is nothing wrong with identifying as bisexual at any age. Sexuality is fluid, and people may lean one way or another throughout their lives. I'm all for being flexible when it comes to labels, especially when putting a label on your sexuality causes you stress, but I very strongly disagree that it's harmful to identify as bisexual at this point in your life. There is no risk to future relationships whatsoever; I can say this as an adult openly bisexual woman in a monogamous, opposite sex relationship. To imply that bisexuality is simply a waypoint on the way to a "normal", straight relationship is dismissive and frankly, offensive. You don't have to have experience with both sexes to know that you are bisexual, just like a straight virgin doesn't have to have had sex to prove that they are straight. It's all about attraction. Don't let anyone change who you are.

As for the problems with your parents: it's hard when you don't have a lot of say in what you do. Parents do typically have your best interests at heart. I remember being forced to play soccer for 5 years even though I hated it and was terrible at it, but it was because it's good for building teamwork skills. Your parents may be looking forward to your college applications; many colleges look favourably on applicants with lots of extracurricular activities. The only suggestion I can really offer is to try bargaining. For example, maybe you could offer to continue altar serving if you are allowed to do gymnastics, or to do gymnastics if you get a part time job and pay for it yourself. Otherwise, it's just a matter of waiting it out. It seems like you're living with your parents forever, but that time flies by before you know it.

Q: I am a female vegetarian and I hate multi-vitamins. I was diagnosed with lupus and a low iron count so I have to get more iron in me I cannot take the iron supplement they give me is there any other way to improve this without taking the supplement or eating meat?
Please help me out with this one. Please and thank you's to anyubody who answers.
I feel your pain: every time I take a multivitamin with iron in it I end up throwing up, so I've had to get creative with my iron intake.

This website does a great job of showing you alternative sources as well as what you get from a serving. It does include meat, but the majority of options are in the plants, vegetables, and meat alternatives category.

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.


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