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last night after dinner my mom told me that she had something to tell me. she told me that she gave birth to me and my identicle twin sister. she told me that she couldnt keep oth of us because she was only 18. she didnt want to give both of us up. so she put my tiwn up for adoption before she was even born. i never knew about this only my mom and my grandma knew. they didnt want to brag about it to anyone. my dad knows about it also(my biological dad, he stayed with my mom through everthing and now theyre married!) so my mom told me that the couple that adopted my twin sister had died in a car accident and my mom was notified. and in their will they didnt give my twin to anyone. all it said was ask jennifer who she wants to live with. so jenny told the lawers that she wanted to live with her biological mom. so the lawyers called my mom and told her and my mom said yes. we get to meet jenny on saturday. im really nervous tho, because i dont know if we're alike or if were different and i dont know what to talk to her about. if anyone can give me advice i would be very happy. also im nervous if shell like hate me because my mom chose to put jenny up for adoption and not me. omg im so scared. (link)
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It will be strange at first for all of you. There isn't to many ways around that! It will be fine though. It won't last long.
Just talk to her about things you like. You will be very surprised at how much you have in common.
It sounds as if she knows the story of her adoption. She may have known it all her life. She may have questions for your parents, which is natural, but she shouldn't blame you for anything. The fact that she chooses to live with you tells me she is probably fine with how things worked out.
Saturday will be an exciting day for your family. It will be great! :)
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14/f
i've never really been like, close with my mom. like we're not really friends. but umm i just got my period and ummmmm i know i have to like tell her sometime! but i don't know how because it would be soo embaressing. should i just tell her or like...? idk! (link)
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Don't be embarrassed to tell her. She will understand and make it easy on you.
Just say "Mom I have started my period". Just say it quick and get it over with! It will be okay. :)
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I have been with this girl for 4 months now. We have everything in common. We loved eachother very much. We did everything together. We were soulmates. However, She has seen a pornsite on my computer and has broken down and left me saying we are only seperated. I am not addicted. I normal male like all others whose curiosity got the better of him. I have told her That I got rid of the net. That I promise never to do it again that i want to spend the rest of my life with her. i cried when she left. It has been almost two weeks now. How can I win her back. How can i get her to give us a second chance. I lover her and she was all I had. Please help me. I can't go on without her. (link)
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I wouldn't at all.
You don't give an age but if you are able...
Go buy a bunch of her favorite flowers.
Go spill your heart out to her and let her know
you love her very much.
Explain to her your reason for looking at the porn...normal male curiosity, and, if you are sure about it, tell her you will look no more.
Talk. Be honest and if she is serious about your future together, it will work out.
Best of luck. :)
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Hey advicenators :)
Okey, I've searched all over google! But I can't seem to find what I'm looking for! I need an article on how your childhood affects your adultlife. Or anything along those lines. I really need it, and I need to find it before tomorrow, but I'm a terrible googler :(
Help, please ?
ps. I would love it if the article had any scientific proof or so for this discovery. But it's not that important.
THANK YOU A WHOLE LOT! =D (link)
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OK Here are a couple of places to try. Hope they are of help. :)
Scroll down a short ways:
http://mentalhelp.net/psyhelp/chap9/chap9l.htm
This one may be somewhat helpful:
http://extension.unh.edu/Family/Family.htm
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My husband's parents recently brought up the idea of buying a large piece of property in my town so they, my husband and I, and my brother-in-law and his family can all live together. We will each have our own house on the property so it will be something like a family commune.
I'm against the idea. They tend to be nosy and don't see a problem with dropping in unannounced and expecting to be entertained. There is also the fact that they do not like me and go out of their way to make sure I know that. They have went so far as to tell me that I'm a bad wife and tell my husband he made a mistake marrying me. I have told my husband that if they do move here, I want to move somewhere else. He is also against the idea. He sees their obvious dislike of me and also doesn't like the idea of the loss of privacy. I spoke to my sister-in-law and she said that she and her husband are against the idea as well. She also mentioned that she would want to move if they move here.
My problem is this: no one will tell my in-laws that they don't like the idea. I'm afraid that if no one says something, my in-laws are going to take that as acceptance of their idea and go forward with it. They already have started the search for property. Once they buy the property, we'll all feel obligated to move onto it, even though it's going to make us miserable. My husband and his brother say that they can't stop them if they want to move here. If I or my sister-in-law say something, we run the risk of being accused of keeping them from their sons and grandchildren.
How would you handle a situation like this? (link)
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Ideal scenario would be that the brothers get out from under the control of their parents and speak up.
A simple, "Buy property where you want to, but me and my wife will choose our own place to live" would be nice!
They are right that they can't tell them where to live. They do not have to be roped into building on the property though.
If all else fails, and you don't think it would cause YOU problems, get with your sister in law and tell them yourselves.
I'm afraid if you don't it will cause marital problems down the line. Once the distance you have now is gone....those brothers are going to be under the parents control even more. They will be expected to run to them and do their bidding at the drop of a hat! Not good at all.
I would tell my hubby to grow some brass ones and speak up. :)
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okay.. if someone was pregnant and within the first couple of weeks of being pregnant fell down the steps or something and had a miscarriage, would the baby/fetus still have to be removed? ill rate 5s. (link)
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Yes, the baby has to be removed no matter what.
Not to be morbid but if it wasn't removed it would rot and possibly cause gangrene and any number of life threatening infections including toxic shock syndrome.
If you feel you might be pregnant, take a test.
If you are pregnant tell your parents. TRYING to induce a miscarriage will more than likely do you
a lot of harm.
You could injure yourself permanently. You could lose a lot of blood. You will definitely end up in the hospital and they will find out anyway.
If you think you are pregnant and have fallen down stairs. Seek medical attention. It is nothing to fool around with.
If I have taken your question the wrong way I do apologise. It is a very odd question for someone to ask out of the blue.
If you need someone to talk to I would be happy to listen. I have been there.
Please, don't do anything stupid.
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met this guy at a math conference that took place over two days. He's really cute, fun to talk to, and really smart. During the conference breaks, we basically spent the whole time talking and hanging out. I know this sounds ridiculous, but...I have a big crush on him now. The only problem is---I'll probably never see him again. He goes to school in a different county 80 miles away. And I never got his AIM or email. And I can't get the directory for his school and call him because I would look and feel like a stalker. How should I get over him?
(link)
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It doesn't sound ridiculous at all!
You wouldn't at all be a stalker if you looked him up and called him. He may even be thinking the same way about you if you got along so well!
A stalker is one who just doesn't take No!, leave me alone, for an answer. So try looking him up. If he doesn't want to be friends...then you can forget him and not call him anymore.
Good luck. :)
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okay i have to get a filling tomorrow morning and i am so freaked out. i HATE needles more then anything in the world. can you tell me from your personal experience how bad the shot hurt for you?? (link)
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Did you know dentists don't have to give you a shot to fill cavities?
I always thought they did. But they don't. I happened to be petrified of needles myself. I don't know why exactly. The thought of it has always been much worse than the actual shot!
Anyway, My dentist told me it is mostly done because its what people expect. He filled mine,
even put caps on with no shot. Didn't hurt either. You might ask your dentist.
The times I did get a shot it really wasn't that bad at all. :)
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i have no relatives that live close i dont want to leave all my friends. but thanx for answering my question (link)
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Your very welcome.
I hope things work out for you. If you need to talk drop by anytime.
Hang in there. :)
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well long story short... my mom has been drinking since i was born which would be almost 15 years. she cant go more than 5 days without drinking. When she drinks she starts stuff with me and my dad and her argue EVERY time he finds out she is drinking. my dad pops pills and probably does other stuff. he doesnt know that i know. when my mom isnt drinking i tell her that i think he is and that he talks to people on his cell when im in the car and its obvious that he is talking to someone that is giving him that stuff. Well anyways i tell her that stuff when shes not drinking and i tell her not to tell my dad. and then when she is drinking she tells him everything. shes did it a couple times. and i cant help telling her what i think because shes my mom. i always get stressed out. and my dad yells at me when i tell her. and he says that im a shitstarter.thats not true. i dont like them arguing but i also dont like keeping stuff inside. my dad has a bad anger problem and my mom drinks. ive been going through this stuff and listening to them yell since i was little. i know shes not a good mom and hes not a good dad. but im only 14 so i cant leave unless i run away which i really want to do. tonite was the most recent night the have been fighting and im crying right now. i want to get put in a foster home but people tell me that is will be worse there. i know this isnt healthy for me. i dont want to be upset all the time i want to have a normal mom. and live a normal life. ive always wanted to die and these are one of the reasons y, because i listen to this stuff alot. i never tried killing myself but im scared for my own health because i know one day ill get the courage to do it. i know theres nothing wrong that im doing i just wish i was never born.
any advise will help. im dying inside.
please dont tell me to help my mom and dad get help because that is not a option for me.
love,kaykay (link)
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Do you have a relative you can stay with?
I think it would be in your best interest to move in with someone else. A relative would be best but if it has to be a foster family then do it.
There comes a time when you have to save yourself. Maybe your being taken from the home will straighten at least one of your parents up. Though that is no guarantee, of course.
If you don't have a relative you can discuss the option with, go to the school counselor for help.
Good luck to you. :)
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hey, I'm looking for some good advice because I basically don't what to do anymore. I recently got dumped by this guy. I really loved him, it wasn't one of those "fake" loves as you might call it. I really was and still am in love with him, I would give anything and do anything for him. He did love me at one point too and he claims he doesn't know why he stopped. He thinks that it could be that I took him for granted or was unappreciative and that I hurt him. But I never even knew I was doing any of this, and if I had known I would have tried my hardest to fix the problem. I'm so confused and I've tried almost everything, and now I'm lost. My friends say that I should just move on, but I don't want to give up because I just have this gut feeling that he will come back. One reason being that I don't believe some one can just stop loving within a couple of days. And the reason he stopped loving me so quickly wasn't because he didn't love me in the first place, because he really did. So, I don't know if I should keep hoping and holding on and waiting or give up and try to move on. Advice would be much appreciated! (link)
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Write him a letter.
Pour out your heart and put everything in there you want to tell him.
How much you care, what he means to you, how you feel without him, what you would change if you were to try again. Everything.
Its much easier to talk to someone when they aren't interrupting you. :)
Give it to him and hope for the best. If it does nothing to change his feelings...then you move on.
Hope it works for you. :)
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i've just broken up with my boyfriend of nearly four years. it's been four days since we've last spoken, and i know i shouldn't feel this way, but i feel terrible.
i've tried going out with friends, making myself productive, and yet i still can't get him off my mind.
any tips? (link)
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Why should you not feel terrible? You just lost 4 years of life with someone!
You are going to feel terrible for a while. It is perfectly normal that you do.
Every single thing is going to remind you of him.
If you are going out with friends and all that you are doing what you can for now. You probably won't really get over him until someone comes along to replace him. That might just be awhile.
Time. That's the only thing that will help. I'm sorry, there just isn't any quick fix for you.
Continue to go out with friends. Have some fun when you can, and try not to let it get you down to much. When it does, get up and go do something...even when you don't feel like it.
It WILL get better. :)
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me and this guy tyler are really close.. we're pretty much already going out. we just haven't made it official yet (he hasn't asked me!). i'm tired of waiting forever for him to ask me. do you think that i should just go ahead and ask him myself? if so, what do i say?
thanks (link)
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Sure. If you like him go ahead and ask him out.
Just say "his name" would you like to go to the movies with me on saturday afternoon? Or something along those lines.
Good luck! :)
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Hey..
I just lost my friend to a shooting incident and lately I've been having dreams about her.. like really horrible dreams.
like the other night i had a dream that we were just hanging out and then all of a sudden she pulled out a gun and shot herself in the head.. is there any way to stop haiving these dreams?
also..my mom woke me up after one of the dreams and i starting cursing at her. i didnt mean to i was really upset..and im grounded for a month. i dont like i should be grounded that long. do you agree? should i say something to her about it?
sorry so long. thanks.. (link)
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I think you should tell your mom why you did that. I also think she will understand. You really shouldn't get punished that for that long for doing something you really had no control over. Saying something may change the punishment some.
If mom doesn't give in though, take the punishment without giving her to much grief about it. It will be over soon. :)
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Okay so my feet smell terribly bad...well...actually its my shoes (birkenstocks...how ever they are spelled)...i wash them out but within a week they have gunk back in them and smell disgusting...its the only pair of shoes i have for now and the smell is embarrasing...is there anyway to keep this from happening because i absolutely dread washing them...
(link)
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Here is a web site that has some great info on smelly shoes and feet!
Just click on the section you want to read about.:)
http://www.cyh.com/HealthTopics/HealthTopicDetailsKids.aspx?p=335&np=289&id=2146#3
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well theres this dance like Thursday, and I'm going. I have a boyfriend who is one year younger than me if you care. Anyways, if he asks me to dance, i know I'm going to be nervous.
this may be odd, but can someone explain to me how exactly to slow dance.
Like should i put my hands on his shoulders?
Should I smilke?
WHAT!?
5's if ya give a good one!
xoxox
thanks in advance.. (link)
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This site has a lot of different dance steps on it. Go to the section for slow dancing and have yourself some practice runs!
http://www.partydirectory.com/dance/
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me and my bf have had sex and my mom thinks we did she is right but idn wat to tell her should i (link)
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If you and your mom have a good relationship, it might be a good time to say something.
She could then take you to a doctor and get you some birth control. What a relief for you not to have to worry so much about pregnancy!
The flip side would be if she angers easily and would have you break up with your boyfriend.
Be safe whatever you decide to do. If you haven't looked at this web site yet, now is the time. It has great information on birth control and all those kinds of things. :)
http://www.coolnurse.com/gyn_stuff.htm
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ok...i have a big problem my best friend since seventh grade is working right now in mississippi, but shes planning on comming back home soon, when she gets here shes expecting me to go out with her to tha club and go on some trips to texas and germany but my fiance (of three years) who i love verry much doesn't like my friend because when we go out she likes to look for guys and trys to get me to also, I really dont want to hurt either person...and he will never trust her because of the things that have happend before...also i really dont know if i can trust her either because we are really good friends but she stayed the night at our house one night and when i went to bed my fiance was in the living room and she got out of bed and went to the living room in her t-shirt and panties and im like ok what should i do i mean i know all the things shes done and i still for some reason dont want to hurt her but then again i dont want to hurt my fiance we are getting along really good right now but when she comes around we will end up fighting im sure what should i do?
ps.I'm a 21 year old f (link)
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She may expect you to go to all these places with her, but you don't have to.
You are sort of settled down in a relationship and she is not. Explain that to her.
It doesn't have to end your friendship, but it does change things somewhat. Going out and partying the night away is okay for her. You have a guy, you don't need to do all that anymore. She needs to understand that.
Go shopping with her, out to lunch...those type of things. But let her know right now, that you will not be acting like the party girl while she is here. Unless your fiance wants to go along.
Let her stay at a hotel or another friend or relative when she visits. Her behavior is pretty disrespectful when she is in your home.
Don't hurt your relationship with your fiance because of your friends antics. Him you will be seeing the rest of your life, every day. She just swings by for a while when she is in the neighborhood. :)
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If you tell a guy your friends with on MSN messanger that you want to soak in the bath tub; and he responds with GO FOR IT with a huge grin next to it; does it sound like he's turned on?
Also he signed of by saying caio bello; which means bye beautiful in italian. He talked to me for about an hour. He also said I'm a great person to know and talk to and that I made him laugh. He also admitted he dreamt about me.
Do you think he likes me as more than a friend? (link)
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Could be. Keep up the chatter with him and see what happens.
I don't think that on thing, the "go for it", necessarily means much. The rest of it sounds good though. :)
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ok so i have posted stuff about my realtionship and my breakup before but for those who read this and dont know, we dated for 2 years and been broke up for a little over a month. i am 19 he is 23. ok so my latest problem is kinda complicated. ok here goes i had to meet him today to give him his stuff well our little meeting turned into a 2 hour long meeting, and here is what he had to say i am sorry i never meant for this to happen i do love you i just dont know what i want. i told him he acts like he doesnt care. he said that he stays up sometimes wondering if what he is doing is right. i told him i thought we are making a mistake he said you are probably right but i guess i will find out the hard way. what does that mean? ok so tell me what he meant by all this i dont understand, why he would say all this and still not want to be back together and it is killing me. what do you all think i dont know anymore. please let me know something. i just cant stand being apart from him. i have to meet him again on sat becuase i forgot some stuff and so did he what should i say hoe should i act. god i dont know what to do anymore i am going crazy i really do love him and want to be with him but i dont know how long i should wait on him. i never doubted that he would be back but i just dont want to wait should i give him a aultimatum or just give him time. (link)
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He sounds confused. Moving on (as you know) is difficult. A lot of habits are formed in a couple of years, and you both are part of those habits for each other.
Write it out. Write him a letter and tell him your feelings. Everything. Just be brutally honest about it. Let him read it and see if it changes anything at all. If it doesn't then decide what you'll do. Give it this one last try.
Finding out he made a mistake the hard way sounds as if he still has feelings for you. However, he wants to be free at the moment. He realizes he may regret it later...maybe when it is to late. You may very well move on. You should if he doesn't change his mind soon. Life is to short to wait around.
I hope the letter works. Give it a try and see what comes of it. :)
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