|
friend/fiance
ok...i have a big problem my best friend since seventh grade is working right now in mississippi, but shes planning on comming back home soon, when she gets here shes expecting me to go out with her to tha club and go on some trips to texas and germany but my fiance (of three years) who i love verry much doesn't like my friend because when we go out she likes to look for guys and trys to get me to also, I really dont want to hurt either person...and he will never trust her because of the things that have happend before...also i really dont know if i can trust her either because we are really good friends but she stayed the night at our house one night and when i went to bed my fiance was in the living room and she got out of bed and went to the living room in her t-shirt and panties and im like ok what should i do i mean i know all the things shes done and i still for some reason dont want to hurt her but then again i dont want to hurt my fiance we are getting along really good right now but when she comes around we will end up fighting im sure what should i do?
ps.I'm a 21 year old f
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Why are you still friends with her?
(female/24)
]
ok, about the coming out t-shirt and panties thing, is she the type of person who is really laid back and doesn't think half-nude flesh is a big deal? i myself will run around in a big t-shirt and boxer shorts, even around my guy friends, and they don't mind because they know i'm not trying to seduce them, i'm just a random bouncy ADD poster child. ^_^
however, it was probably a little inappropriate for her to go waltzing around in her smalls in your house when your fiance was there. to be fair to her, maybe she didn't know he was there.
what has she done that's given you a reason to distrust her or suspect she has ulterior motives or dihonourable intentions?
now, usually when people are friends for that long, they know each other pretty well and love each other to death. but the amount of time you've been friends might not necessarily coinside with how good a friend she's been. has she done anything that seems like she was using you to get something for herself, or has she not been there for you but still expects you to be there for her?
talk to her about what the ground rules would be if she did come to your house again, and what the limitations on your trips would be, should you decide to take them. let her know that you're concerned about your relationship.
hope this helped. good luck! and happy early honey-moon. ^_^
~*kitty*~
]
She may expect you to go to all these places with her, but you don't have to.
You are sort of settled down in a relationship and she is not. Explain that to her.
It doesn't have to end your friendship, but it does change things somewhat. Going out and partying the night away is okay for her. You have a guy, you don't need to do all that anymore. She needs to understand that.
Go shopping with her, out to lunch...those type of things. But let her know right now, that you will not be acting like the party girl while she is here. Unless your fiance wants to go along.
Let her stay at a hotel or another friend or relative when she visits. Her behavior is pretty disrespectful when she is in your home.
Don't hurt your relationship with your fiance because of your friends antics. Him you will be seeing the rest of your life, every day. She just swings by for a while when she is in the neighborhood. :)
]
More Questions: |