helpachick's advice column

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Q: I am not sure this is the right category for this but I figured its all pretty much the same thing. Ok here is the deal. I feel so large. I have a big butt and my stomache seems to be getting bigger. I don't have like fat fat but i just feel so big compared to all my friends who have extremely small waists. I'm about 5"3 and range 110-113 pounds i believe but who knows? I might even weigh 120. Anyways I feel really big and I need some major diet help. I need exercise tips that will help me. My goal is to lose like 10 pounds. I am not anorexic but tis time to find something to do. I will rate high for good answers.

hey well i would run...it really helps! and then also you can do crunches, sit ups etc. to keep a tight belly. go to www.excersize.about.com
it should help!
xoxohelpachick

Q: If you had to pick one over the other, would you pick diamond earrings or a pearl necklace?

earrings--http://www.tiffany.com/shopping/item.aspx?c_id=WEB1&c_it=52U4&start_id=66&CategoryId=501&category=Diamonds&

&&&

necklace--
http://www.tiffany.com/shopping/item.aspx?c_id=WEB1&c_it=57I5&start_id=91&CategoryId=66&category=Jewelry&

i would choose the diamond earrings...it makes you sparkle and shine and a girl can't live w/o diamonds!! bling bling
xoxoxohelpachick

Q: Is there any risk,if I have food with unwashed hands in which i was holding my clean puppy ?

well even if your puppy has been bathed, he is still probably a little dirty. (all living things are like this) but i'm sure that if you eat w/o washing your hands you won't like keel over and die or anything. it probably isn't the healthist but just don't like lick your fingers or anything and you'll probably be ok
xoxo helpachick

Q: my friends and i alwayss hang out together. thing is, i kind of want to have some alone time with my one guy friend, if you know what im sayin. how could i go about hinting this to him?

well i would like find sometime when all (or most) of your friends are busy. then ask him since they all are doing something if he would wanna do something with you so you two aren't the only 2 being bored out of their minds. or find a movie that you know he wants to see, but none of your other friends are really wanting to go see. then be like well i'll go with you if you wanna go see it. something along those lines would be ways to spend some one on one time
xoxohelpachick

Q: I have asked one of the q's but see the prob is as some of you kno there is this guy who likes me but I dont kno If i like him or no
he is nice but sorta ugly and sorta cute.

looks shouldnt matter i think if he's nice and you like him that way then, yeah if he asks you out you should consider going out!
xoxohelpachick

Q: ok this past weekend my cousin which is like a sister to me i mean everyone thinks we're twins actually came and stayed with me over the weekend and Friday my other cousin come over which isn't from where i am and i hadnt seen her in forever...well lets call the one everyone thinks is my twin Kaci and lets call the one i havent seen in awhile Michelle well Michelle knows the guy that Kaci goes with and she has known him for a loong time and she's real good friends with his sister well...she told me some stuff that shouldnt have been said and then she told me i needed to have a talk with Kaci and tell her to make sure it's the right thing before she slept with him or anything and for me to tell her how it messes with your life and your reputation well without thinking i told Kaci and Kaci really got mad at me and we were just giving her some advice and trying to save her from ruining her life...which i guess was wrong...and she went back and told her boyfriend that we was trying to break them up and said he had all kinds of diseases and stuff and that we said if she slept with him then she would get those diseases and mess her life up...which isnt the truth and me and her boyfriend was friends he helped me out all the time and now he doesnt want anything to do with me and doesnt want her to come back to my house...I dont know what i should do anymore because she lied on the both of us and we dont really appreciate that because we dont want them breaking up we're the ones that hooked them up in the first place you know..what do we need to do?

hey. well it really showed how caring you 2 were for warning your cousin about those things, but maybe you should've brought up the subject of if she was even thinking about it first. but anyways just tell her you were just trying to be a good friend&cousin. she'll have to understand that and if she doesnt...she still listened and has heard it, so maybe -even if she doesnt want you to think that she will- maybe she will think of the stuff you told her and think twice and be more careful if a situtation w/ her b/f ever comes up.
xoxohelpachick

Q: OK I am about 5'0 or 5'1 and I weight about 140 ilbs. Im big and I know. I want to get a flat stamach the fastest I can. I love coke but i am willing to give it up. I just can not stand water. So what is somthing I can drink? I do not like most vegies, but I love all kinds of fruit. I do not own a bike. I would be willing to walk alot each day but it needs to fit in between homework and computer time. I love the computer so like yeah. LOL. How many crunches should i do also? I rate 5's!

Thx! *** Michelle

ok well you should try drinking juices and/or milk...those are the next healthiest things to water probably. yeah those fruits will help and walking is definitly a plus. try to do 100-150 crunches to start with each night
xoxohelpachick

Q: ok well I was the one who broke up with my bf, and its been three days and hes ready to ask out another girl! we went out for a month and a half! i mean im only 13/f but still... does anyone else think its weird? i mean im really hurt... what should i do?

hey.. so i kno it is VERY hard! but unfortunately, there is nothing you can do about him having another g/f so soon. thats his decision and quite frankly a rude one since he was probably pretty in to u and all the sudden thinking he's so over u. he's just being a jerk of a guy...thats the way some of them are
xoxo helpachick

Q: hey ok well i am 15 and i am in love with ym best friends little sister. i have known her my entire life and i have never thought of her as more then just like a litte sister i guess but her bro is like rele protective of her how do i ask her out without making him pissed and risk hurting my relationship with either of them or theirs with eachother she has been acting wierd around us when i am over there adn she doesnt hang out with us as much and she has a bunch of guys that r just friends that r over there all teh time too adn i feel weird like i suddenly become all protective like her bro! please help

ok...well here it goes this is a little bit of a different question than i've ever been asked before; but i will do my best! well i think that you being 15 and your own person should be able to go out w/ whoever you want. but, it is your good friends little sister. i would talk to him about your feelings for his little sis first. make sure it is just the two of you, and tell him you have something really important to tell/ask him. and just say it. say something like "well ok we've been friends forever right, and before i've been able to tell you everything without you freaking out. so please just listen and be cool about this. see lately i have been kinda having some other feelings besides "friends little sis" for you little sister. and dude please don't be mad b/c i'm not just hanging with you to see your sister. and you know me well enough to know that if i went out with her, i wouldnt be some scum bag to her, and i really hope none of this will change the friendship between me and you." and just let the ball stay in his field. maybe say this over the phone so you can just leave after this, and not stick around for an ockward silent sort of fight. but yes admit your feelings, and if he's ok with it, then go ahead and ask her out. i have a feeling that even though he's really protective over her, since he knows youreally well, he might be alright with you and her
xoxohelpachick good luck!!

Q: Hey everyone, first off if your answerign this, dont give me some stupid answer or some unhelpful information cuz i really need some help. I have a really big problem with cussing. I really cant help it sometimes, its really hard and i cannot stop cursing. It feels real bad when i do it but sometimes it feels like it comes natural. wat can i do? i really dont know how to stop

hey ok you have a couple options

-every time you cuss, or every morning or night whichever, say a prayer to god go help you stop cussing.

-wear a rubberband or hair thing around you wrist, and everytime you cuss snap it really hard; think of this as a sort of punishment towards yourself for doing this

good luck!!! xoxo helpachick

Q: so i write a lot, mainly poetry.... but lately ive lost my inspiration.... how do i find inspiration?

hey well maybe you should enter some poetry contests to really get yourself working and thinking about your peotry. you could also maybe (if your into this sort of thing) research another famous poet, and read all about them and i think that might give you some inspiration to do great things of your own!
xoxo helpachick

Q: a lot of my friends have drifted away. what are some activities/ things i can do to get them back and let them know i still care?

hey well i think you should do something that you know you guyz would all enjoy. you could maybe all get together for a big movie night. rent a whole bunch of scary movies, disney movies, date movies(chick flicks), harry potter series, etc. -whateva you like- then spend the night watching movies and hanging out and eating popcorn and talking...this way you would have something to do the whole time, and there probably wouldnt be any ockward silences.have fun
xoxohelpachick

Q: Ok well I like this guy, he's awesome, and I've liked him for like.. a year... and I don't know if I should tell him because sometimes he freaks if someone says they like him... which I no, is stupid. What should I do?

hey! wat i would do would be just to be really flirty with him. soon enough that will give him the impression that you like him..w/o actually TELLING him. (who knows maybe he likes you too!:) xoxohelpachick

Q: Okay, I need help. I like this guy, lets call him Mike. Well we grinded a couple times and he's always hugging me when he sees me. I heard he was going to ask me out. Well the problem is my ex, lets call him Devon, wants to go out with me again. I kinda still like him and he asked me out but I said I don't know. I know he's gonna ask me again in school and I don't know what to do.

Please Help
I rate high.
xxx Bianca xxx

hey...well i think that whenever people go out w/ the same person again, sometimes things dont work out that great. i think that waiting for this mike guy to ask you out might be better. it would give you a fresh start w/ somebody new for a while. maybe like in a year or after a while if your not going out with anyone and your ex wants to go out, maybe things could be really great for a longer time then. xoxohelpachick

Q: My past relationship hurt me so bad, that all I want to do know is be cool with everyone. The only thing is a lot of boys want to go with me and I want to talk to them but everytime I think about the hurt that this last boy caused me that I don't want to go through it again. Can someone help me think of ways to get over it. Thank YOu

hey well if you want to go out with someone-minus the fact of how hurtful the last one turned out, you should! just choose wisely; choose a REALLY nice and caring guy who even if he did break up with you, he would most likely have a good reason and be nice about it. xoxohelpachick

Q: ok so theres this guy that i used to like, but we had a falling out and hated each other for a long time. he said something about me to one of my friends that he was assuming about me, and i got mad and wrote him a very long xanga entry explaining in detail why he was a shithead and why he was wrong.

and then i had to work with him for a project, and now, all of the sudden hes been really nice to me... waving at me, making jokes... im just wondering what could have changed. why is he doing this? is it because of what i said?

how can i find out what hes feeling without actually asking?

hey...well i'm guessing that the guy has probably just matured out of all the stuff from the past. maybe its time to give him a second chance! xoxohelpachick

Q: I've heard that when you're trying to lose weight that it's important to eat several small, healthy meals a day instead of only one or two large meals. What's a decent number of small meals a day to start with? Do you increase or decrease as time goes on?

well i've heard that you are supposed to eat your 3 meals a day, and the whole time your on the diet just eat healthy things and only eat when your hungry and only until your full
xoxohelpachick

Q: i got my hair cut, i wanted it to my shoulders but she cut it to the bottom of my ears and i hate it. are there any natural ways that i can make my hair grow fast?
also are there any good products that i can get at walmart that will work fast?
5's for any answers!

something you can do that is totally healthy to make your hair grow faster is to take vitiman E pills. vitiman E helps your hair grow faster, and taking it will NOT harm you a bit. if you really dont want to take pills though, then eat food with a lot of Vitiman E in it...
xoxohelpachick

Q: ok sorry its long but... i have a lot of problems and i dont know whats wrong with me. there are just so many things...here are just a few:
1-i cut myself...like really deep to the point where i pass out and wake up with blood all over

2-i pull the ends of my hair on urdge

3-i feel tension and stress about everything bad

4-i over analyze EVERYTHING makeing it scary and bad

5-i think about suicide all the time

6-my mood can change in an instant-one minute ill be all happy and something will happen or someone will say something and ill go all depressed

7-i burn myself on occasion

8-i find it really hard to express my feelings and what imthinking b/c ik that noone will understand...they will try but they just dont get what im going through unless they r goin through it too

9-i am always tired all the time b/c i dont sleep much...i havent in like a week

10-i have lost a lot of weight b/c i refuse to eat and when some one makes me eat i throw it back up

11-at times i will find my self sitting in my room and all of a sudden i will just like start crying and i will cry for hours

12-for the past year i have been trying so hard to make it sound like i am happy and im so good to the point where my parents think that i am a "happy delightful young lady who is fun to be around"

you see? there are so many things wrong with me and like i have tried sooo many different ways to cope with the stress in my life but like nothing that i have tried works! its just realy hard and idk what to do.

ill rate high for good answers...nothing cocky plz

♥ rrenef ♥

hey! omg this is so weird...someone REALLY close to me went through this not too long ago. the crying all the time is a pain in the butt, and hurting yourself for no reason not wanting to but at the same time wanting to- i know. it will sound unclear to someone else at first, but you NEED to tell someone...and soon. keeping this going and doing these things will only get worse. tell someone you know you can trust-someone who will help you too not JUST listen. also...i'm not sure if you're a christian or not but it helps to pray to god to help you through this and to become better again...to REALLy be happy+ dont worry about what might happen if you tell someone...you need to and its for the better and by telling somone things WILL get better:) xoxohelpachick

Q:
To be honest A part of me doesnt want a boyfriend right now and another part does. Ive been going out with my bf for two years today.. I'm still young and my boyfriend is two years older. I dont realy know what to do or say right now but ive felt like crap today. Its hard to expalin..When he kisses, hugs me, or anything i dont feel butterflys or somthing special. But.. When this new kid that i just met yesterday (ive hung out with him all day the last two days) if i just think about him i get butterflys and i can feel my heart pounding...

Signed,
Confused

13/f

P.s The new kid is only a year older and is in my grade.. My bf is 15 1/2 and is in 9th..

hey...well ok i think that you and your b/f now have had a probably pretty good relationship; however maybe it just wasnt meant to be. I would break it off with him and move on. if you like this other guy that much better than your b/f, somethings not right about that. so be a g/f to the guy who you like the most...(new kid most likely;)
xoxohelpachick

bio

hey im helpachick & i want to help you if i can. more than most of the questions i answer i have experienced something close to that myself. so feel free to ask&leave stuff in my inbox or whatever, and i'll try to get back soonish.

what about me?
I'm in college majoring in Fashion Textiles and Merchandising. I love fashion, boys, my friends, music, and love being active and outdoors. theres a lot more i could put about me but this is advicenators not myspace!!
ask away^.^