about

Hi peepsss.............

I'm from Curacao ..a little island in the carribean .
Currently I'm studying and living in Holland(Europe)

In good papiamentu (that's my language )we say ""Mi ta un hende alegre y semper kontentu"

Hopi bendishon pa boso tur (God bless you all)


advice

okay this is kind of complicated but here it goes, i was talking to this guy online for awhile. me being 17, and him telling me he was 18. my feelings for him were becoming strong, and we decided to meet up. when we did, he wasn't the person he told me he was. he was actually 36 years old!! and told me that he also had 2 kids!! but that their mother was out of the picture. putting the age difference aside... even though he had lied to me about a lot of things, i had already fallen for him, and forgave him. we haven't been seeing each other anymore, but still talk, and had planned on getting together when i turned 18. PLEASE DON'T JUDGE THIS DECISION. that's not what i'm here for. when i found out he had a 14 year old daughter, i searched for her on myspace and found her. i requested her as a friend, and after looking at her page a few times found out that she has a STEP MOM and a STEP BROTHER that also live with them! i was so heartbroken. i still haven't told him that i found out because i don't want him to know i was "snooping", even though i think that is something i deserve to know. so now, a normal person would probably be thinking "how can i get rid of this freak?!" but i am so in love with him that all i'm thinking is "i hope he chooses me and gets rid of his wife in may!!" i know i should stop talking to him, but its soo hard. i fell in love with him before i knew about all the lies and now it's just too hard to walk away. what should i do???

I think you felt in love with this man because he know just the right words to say to make you fall in love

He is a grown man and your just a big girl but not yet a woman (in a positive way)
My advice to you is ,you are very young and you have a lot of another guys to meet
give yourself this chance,you deserve to meer someone as young as you

And putting all the age thing aside ,he already lied to you ,are you shure you want to spent your life with a lier ?

take care

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Theres this guy, and we have been together for a year...this october it would have been two years. but just yesterday I broke it off. the reason is becuz Im looking for a serious relationship, something with a future. and i thought thats where we were headed, but it turns out his mother was very against the idea of us (even though she never met me or even gave me a chance)

anyways now im reaaalllllyyy heartbroken, and i mean i did it to myself. I've lost my best friend, the person I could talk to about anything, and the person i loved more than myself. but what else could I have done? he pretty much told me he couldn't go against his mother...

I guess I just need some comforting... :(

I understand you!!!

I pretty much had been through the same and It was hell
In my case my bf went against his parents ..he had to....becuase they were abusive to him ...
I did broke up with him and he went back to his parents but than he realise that he can't let his parents break his life just becuase they feel to...They really destroyed his life ..they even took him away from his child...
I still feel quilty sometimes for beeing the reason why he went against his parents
eventhough it was for a good reason
My advice to you is just WAIT
If God made him for you ..Beliefe me he will be back!!!
But if he doesn't there will be a better one just made for you .....

Maybe you could seek comfort in a good friend!!
That helped me a lot ..!!

Hope I really helped
Good luck!!

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I am an 18-year-old female and I feel as though my boyfriend controls me. He limits the girls I can talk to and talking to guys is definitely out of the question. In turn I feel as though I should do the same to him, so I do. Except I won't simply tell him to not go out at all. I will tell him to not go out 5 times a week, get drunk with his friends and pick up underage girls. Yet, I still feel guilty for telling him not to do this because I feel as though I have stooped down to his level and that I am now controlling him. He makes me feel this way as well. I love him, we are very close and have been dating for a long while, but what should I do?

Did you already ask him why he is controling ou so much?
There must be a reason
Maybe he don't got enough trust in you or he is afraid of loosing you and don't know how to tell you
You should sit and talk ,let him explain to you why is acting that way
Try to explain that you don't like that he is controling you ..!!

What's up with the underage girls???
Are you shure this is the right guy for you??
To love someone doesn't mean that he is the right one for you!!

Good luck

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There is a guy that have known for a while, but he has been dating a not-so-close friend of mine for most of that time. Over the times that we have spent together, or just chatted online, I've begun to fall deeper and deeper in love with him. I have known that I loved him for a while now, but did not want to ruin our friendship if he didn't feel the same way. A few days ago, he said that he liked me a lot, and wanted me as more than a friend. He was STILL dating the other girl, when he asks me to be his girlfriend. I want to explain why I rejected him, but I'm not sure how. And I also want to know what I should do about my feelings for the highlight of my life. Who just happens to be taken by someone else. I've already tried to forget about him, but I can't do it.

Always,

Lysistrata

You did good to reject him...
because he is still dating another girl....

You deserve a guy who will put you in the first place not second ..He wanted to start a relationship with you while he was dating another girl and that's cheating and believe me if he did it with this girl ..what will stop him to do it to you!!!
Just go ahead and tell him that you rejected him because he is already dating another girl..

Maybe you could not see or hear from him a couple of weeks..that may help to forget him
Try to meet new people and who knows there may be some cute singles hahahah lol

Good luck

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Hi there. This is the first time asking advice like this. First let me start by saying. I am a 31 years old man.

now for my problem.

I have been with the same woman for 12-13 years. we have had 2 children together, one of whom passed away last year and the other that was just born this year. Lately we've been going throughsome rough times. She has been playing with my emotions. A virtual rollercoaster ride. One day i try to cuddle get intimate, and she'll say "We shouldn't do this" the next she's kissing me pationately. The problem i have, is that i have feelings for her how ever dwindled that they are, while exhibiting feelings for another woman. One who has captivated me over the last few weeks.

My issue is i don't feel that the relationship i am in is going anywhere. but with my new born baby i am kind of in a bind. thus my title. I am torn between 2 loves. Or three if you add in my newborn.

please help me figure out what i should do.

First of all sorry for your lost

My suggest to you is that you figure out first what your feelings are toward your wife and the other love

Maybe she(wife) didn't get over the lost that's why she is acting that confusing way.
You are a man and you have your needs maybe this other love gave you the love etc etc that your wife can't or wouldn't give to you ...Maybe that's why you feel so at home with her

It's hard to stick together for so long ...So I would give it a last try
And if you wife happen to really have a problem with the lost... you should stay there help her and raise your baby toghether..
If she don't have a problem .and she just isn't feeling the marriage anymore you should break
You can't stay in a relationship that doesn't have any spice anymore.

But Whatever happen don't ever give up on your child!!!

Hope I helped!!

May the Lord bless you and show you the right way!!

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about a 6 months ago i caught my b/f cheating on me. we were going out for about two years before that and i thought everything was perfect. no warning signs or anything. it hurt me really bad. after that i wouldnt go out with anyone because im so afraid that they'll hurt me like he did. i guess i have a huge trust problem. now theres this guy i like but i just cant go out with him. i know i should because he seems like the perfect guy, but so did my ex. thats my first problem. the other one is that i saw my ex a couple of weeks ago and that brought back old feelings. and he started to call me a few times too. i thought i was over him but now that hes made an appearance im not so sure. he says that he thinks we could patch things up and go out again. i told him that we could never because i wouldnt trust him. he says that he made a mistake and that hes sorry. its like i like him but i hate him. i dont know what to think anymore.

If he cheated on you after 1.4 perfect years what will stop him to hurt you again?

I perfectly understand the trust problem ..but heyyyyyyyy don't let this experience keeps you away from having nice times in your life

To cheat on a someone is hurting him or her ...You would never hurt a person you trutly love right?

So my advice to you is to let him in the past and move on

Hope I helped
Good luck!!

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Okay. So I have this friend, well we're not really friends anymore, but I guess you could still say we are civil. We used to be best friends until we got in this big fight. Her birthday is coming up...Do I get her a present or no?

I think you really want to get her that present so I would say go ahead and buy her one

Good luck

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my boyfriend james raped me a month ago and I think I may be pregnant and my mom will kick me out even if I was raped she's the type of person who thinks I could have done something about it I told my mom he raped me and she asked me how I could be so stupid to let something like that happen what should I do,Iam only 17 and my boyfriend is 19.

I'm very sorry to hear this but ..did you go to the police ?

Did you told your bf your pregnant?
This is not alright ....You need to seek for help .

Maybe he will try to do it again ,just be more carefull and he clearly do not love you if he did he would have never raped you ..

Good luck

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It's hard for advice if the question needs to be brief as there's no background on which to base the answer.

That said, my 15yo daughter (not living here) is showing many signs of a teenager in trouble; she recognises life's tough for her at the moment yet when I've suggested therapy or councelling she flat out refuses. Those close to her have tried to councel her but I feel she needs someone she's not related to, before she'll open up and face the turmoil in her life (some she's created and some out of her control).

I am seriously concerned for her welfare and have tried seeking advice from the "welfare system" which was unable to help.

I'm a 42yo single mum with another daughter 14yo living with me.

Has anyone any advice that is practical?

sorry ...,Maybe I didn't understand clearly what you ment ..my apoligies.

I just mentioned that you should be ready because I work in a teenage center and once we let them go home back most of them comes back worse ...Becuase most parents think that once they are home everything is gone change in a spin into sugarland..

I just wanted to help

I have quiet a lot experience that's why I mentioned to you

Good luck anyway and you don't need to grade this

Dod bless

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My bff is evil. I've known her since 2nd grade when she was nice, then in 5th grade she turned evil. Nobody likes her. She's mean to everybody including me for no reason. I try to help her out and I never get anything positive out of her. Everybody since 5th grade (even my parents) has been telling me to ditch her, but would it be too late? Should I continue being her friend? Should I tell her off? WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Talk to her and explain to her ...
Maybe she has something home bothering her ....or something else
Try to know why she bacame so mean..
if she do not want to listen or she keeps giving you negative things.......... "DITCH HER" because of her behaviour she may be shaking all the good people in YOUR way off .You never know people may think you are the same way she is..MEAN

Maybe she will open her eyes when she is standing alone ..some people are like that.
This will make your frienship stronger or breake it.
Try to not feel sad or wrong you can't care for her when she obviuosly don't do this for herself.

lISTEN TO YOUR PARENTS

Pray for her every night.

Good luck and God bless you both.




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First off, i appreciate anyone who can answer this. second, this is going to be somewhat long but here goes nothing:
On saturday my mom told me my boyfriend could come over. she wasn't home for 30 minutes and he came over during that time which she said she was fine with as long as we don't go upstairs to my room. But we went up there. while we were up there we had sex for the first time and while we were doing it, she came home. so we raced downstairs and acted like nothing happened. and she didn't suspect one thing at all. then the next day *sunday*, one of my friends called me and asked if i had sex with my boyfreind. i told her yes along with the story. while i was telling the story my mom picked up the other phone line and heard EVERYTHING. she knows now and is calling me a slut, and trash. now she is telling me i am not allowed to see my boyfriend ever again and if he steps foot into this house she will call the police because he's 18 i'm 16 and still a minor. so i guess she could have him arrested for him having sex with a minor.
i still want to continue to see my boyfriend but now we are going to have to sneak around. i know that isn't right but that's the only way we can see each other. any advice on what i can do to get my mom to let me see him without her freaking out and calling me a slut???

Well let me start saying that I'm very surprise to hear that you lost your virginity at the age of 16 ..because nowadays people tend to lose it at the age between 12 and 13 . (I work in a teenage center)

Where you ready when you tooke this step or was it just the only chance you and your bf had?

Your mother should not call you names ..
I think she got mad because she had high hopes in you and to prove this she let you invite your bf over.......But heyyyy do not give up moms are like that ..I think the first
ting you need to do is talk to her and explain to her what happened and how you feel when she calls you names .
Try to understand her too ..you hurted her

I think she got even mad when she had to hear it through the phone and not from your own mouth.
I do not know what kinda person she is but I know she wants to protect you .

If you can't talk to her write her a letter...
Do not let more time goes by .
Explain to her ..

This may sound stupid but after you talk or write her a letter maybe you should invite your bf over to talk with your mom.

It took my brother 1 month to talk to me ...afetr I broke my virginity .
I wrote him a letter explaining him and
apoligize myself to him for what he thought I was not ready for and what I was sure I was ready for

It worked and hun beliefe me my brother is the hardest man on the planet...

Hey baby hope I helped

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I'm 15 and and overweight for my size/age. I weight about 150 at 5'8.

Anyways, I got my period (and breasts) in about grade 7. I wore a sports bra from grades 7-8, and a regular bra from grade 9 to 10 (current).
At night of course I don't wear one, or if I'm home alone.

My breasts seem to hang down a lot, as if they have absolutely no support. They aren't up and perky like pictures I've seen, and when I asked my friends they told me that theirs were as well (one of my friends even showed me). What exactly is wrong with mine, why are they so droopy? They are only 34B, so it's not like they are huge or anything. How do I fix them? I just want them to look normal.

oke , Not every one have the same type of boop ..there are slim people with hanging boops too..

Maybe you should get a better bra(not sport bra..,because there are nice and fancy bra as strong as the sport bra and no one will even notice that you have hanging boops)

Do not feel sad........ just think in other good qaulities you have that others do not have and stop worrying about your boops

Losing weight is always healthy ....but I do not think that by losing weight your boops will get perky

There are millions of people with the same issue but they do not talk about it they just have a good qualitie bra


good luck ,
Hope I helped

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My boyfriend and i have been going out since april 1st and yeah hes aazing well, i found out he smokes weed so i yelled at him the first time he promised he would not smoke but of course he did and told me so then he dtiched me one time to go smoke ssaying that he was going to meet up with his friends when right before he promised me a million times he wouldnt. well now i dont know what to do he keeps breaking his promises with me. yeah i do give him credit for tellin me the truth but i dont want him doing that and he knows that. what should i do next time he breaks my promise. should i let him go or what?

It's clear that he was smoking before he even met you ...weed can be very adictive ..
So don't tell him to stop ..tell him to just don't do it around you and you will notice that he will open up more with you because right now you are forcing him to do something he is not ready to do.... but you can help him ...maybe he wont stop but he will try to smoke less weed.

Dont try to see it like he is lieying to you try to see it like he...can't open up with you because you will get mad or sad that is why he is probably lieying to you

Give him a chance to be him self with you and than you have more chance to talk him out off the weed idea..


It may take a whole while but it's worth trying.......

hope I helped

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17F. Ok heres the deal. Me and this guy are sorta on the verge of starting a relationship, but he says he not ready yet. But i think its something else. I don't think that he is over his ex-girlfriend. He swears he's over her but i just don't think he is. He told me the story about wat happened between them and she did do him really wrong,and it really does sound like he was in love with her, but its been over a year now since they broke up, and I know u cant really put a time limit on getting over someone but you shouldn't dwell on it like he does. He keeps bringing her name into all of our conversations and goes on for hours and about how much he loved her and how wrong she did him and how much he misses talking to her. I know that if he loved her, and of course he will always love her, or have some feelings for her theres not doubt about that, and i don't expect him not too, but i don't think its just that. I think he is still IN LOVE with her and trust me theres a big difference. He says he's not but i don't know if i believe him, i mean i want to but there's something in my head and my heart thats telling me that he's still in love with her. And he says that he is kinda looking for some of the qualities that their relationship had, and some similarities between her and the next person he talks to and i am nothing like her. I don't know if i should just let him go and move on. Or tell him that we just need a break until he figures out how he feels about her or wat, although he says he is soo sure that he's over her. Or just keep talking to him and hope that he really is over her.
I need help. Tell me, is he really over her, and wat should i do?????

I don't think he is really over her if he keeps talking about her ....I think he is seeking what he lost in you and that's wrong.

You are right on time because you don't have a relationship yet ...
I will say don't hurt yourself this way because if he is not over her you will sufer a lot and the relationship will not grow old

I think he rather see you as a friend and not as his girlfriend..

You should just be friend with him .

Tell him how you feel and tell him to be honest with him self.Becuase if he is not honest with him self how can eh be honest to you?

Think about it..

Hope I helped

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wel ma dad recently moved away to england 2 work. im findind it difficult 2 cope with my mums constant naggin an rguin! i used 2 get a long wiv ma dad realy wel n he was da onli person i could trust (apart frm ma m8s) and now hes moved i hav nobdy to trust. wen i hav a bad day in skul ma mum trys 2 tlk 2 me abawt it but she onli mkes it worse. well getin to da point, ma dad wants us all 2 move and live with him in england. aparently they'd been thinkin abawt it since he moved. i want to be with him coz i miss him lyk lodz but being 3 years in secondary school im onli rely setelin in and finding ma feet! im realy confused. so if anybody has any kind of advice for this long question id rely appretiate it ty

Maybe you should talk to your mom and explain to her the way you feel she may be able to help you ...
Maybe she was trying to get along with you but you are to hard to get because you only think n your dad ..maybe you should give her a try ..

Talk to your dad about this

Hope I helped

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i hate my dad. he annoys me like deliberatly..he annoys the F*CK outta me and im a vegitarrean and he like sits there talking about animal cruelty and laughing and im really sensative and it makes me cry then when i fight back my mom always takes his side and then he realates meto my brother whose on crack and in jail and it makes me so mad because i get some bad grades and my brother dropped outta highschool to sell drugs and i hate it..and i ran away and for 5 days they didnt notice me..the police did on the street..and i cant take it..i like cry all the time and at school im all bubbley and the only people who knnoww about me are my boyfriend and my best friend..and all i have is music and my bedroom which is constantly violated!! PLEASE HELP ME BEFORE I KILL MYSELF!

You may not believe this but when Iwas at the age of 13 I pass trough almost the same ..My dad first left us than my mom had a relationship with a guy who hated us and he even make my mom a alcohol addict .I was mad a t the world and I even forgot the times I tried to put a end to my life ...Believe me I know how this feel.....

But Listen honey now I am 23 and it has been a hell through my childhood but I never give up
God knows what you are going through .just get on your knees and talk to him and baby believe me he will listen.
..Yust do not fuck up your life because off your parents

A woman ones told me ...baby " you are not missing nothing from your parents ..they are missing you "
They ae the ones who will look back later on and see that they have missed the most beautiful part off their daughter life ....her becoming a woman"
And believe me that will hurt like hell for them so don't worry about them ..God will deal with them ..Just respect them and love them and pray to God that they will open their eyes .

ITS NOT EASY ....GIRL I KNOW THIS!

But you have to understand they have made the wrong desision but you can't trow away your life
yust because they are doinga mistake.

You have a lot to live for and once you notice this you will have far more power to fight to live and not to die
Look at me ...I 'm really happy now .... because I stood up and asked for help ..first to GOD
and than to others(bf,friends,institution)

lET ME KNOW HOW YOU ARE GOING TO DEAL WITH THIS ...i WILL HELP YOU ...iF YOU ALLOW ME..

mY MSN IS marilu_pieter@hotmail.com

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what do you do when everyone in your family is leaving you? my mom and dad have been having problems and always argue. then my dad has a very short temper and always yells at me and makes me feel like shit. what can i do to stop it all?

please help me fast! :'(

Well I have to say trutly that's the way you feel when your family is falling apart it may sound strange but it is very normal that family falls apart nowadays for what reason ever ...Think that it's not hard for only you but your parents too, it's not easy for them to see the family fall apart and that's why day argue with each other in first place.

Maybe you could talk to your dad ,you could begin with telling him that no mather what you will love him BUT....explain to him that he breaks your heart everytime he yells at you .
If you cant talk to your dad maybe you can leave him a note or maybe make a joke or ......tell him it's a school project and you got that question to ask ...(Tell him you need the answer urgent ,tell him it's homework)

There is a lot off way to talk to your parents ...remeber that .
It may seems stupid ..but parents feel relief when their kids talk to them..

And pray a lot
May the Lord bless you and give you the strenght and patient you need.

Good luck
Loesje

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Well there's this guy who's totally in love with me. Seriously. At a dance, he asked my friend if he should as me to dance, and she said sure but what if she says no and he repleid, "It would be worse than if hurricane katrina hit me" or something cheesy like that. So i danced with him once but then sed no the 2nd time. That was a few months ago. Decmeber maybe. BUT NOW he still loves me a lot and might ask me out. I'm not supposed to know because his friend told me and now I'm stuck.

I'm also totally like in love with a 6thg rader to amek things worse!
I'm in 8th grade by the way.
Please help me to say no to this guy without being a heart brekaer and what to doa bout this 6th grade hottie who's also my best friend's cousin. She dosen't mind, but what do i do!
I'll rate if your helpful.

I would tell this guy in really friendly way that I only want him as a good friend and explain to him that you really don't want to hurt him his feelings ..maybe you should try to expalin to him that he deserve someone who really loves him back.

And the 6 grade hottie ,,maybe you could try to be a friendfirst and than slowly tell him that you have a crush on him,Help him out with homeworks etc etc
Get to know him better and let he get to know you better

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