my boyfriend of two years dumped me he sayed he does not know what he wants anymore. but recently he told me that he does love me but is not in love with me. i love him so much and am having a hard time getting over him help? But he on the other hand is partying and having a good time he says that he is hurting to, then why isnt he showing it? He just left to go back out of town and called to tell me he wanted to tell me bye and talk befor he left. but when we talked all he sayed was that he would call me when his plane landed. but flight was cancelled so we did not talk. another question he always acts mean toward me when we talk. help i love him and dont know how to get over him? i am 18 he is 22.
I know it's hard to hear and deal with. I've dealt with the same feelings and confusion, and it's hard when you feel like a relationship had been going great and then, all of a sudden it seems, the other person feels it's time to break it off.
The first thing to do is, just let yourself take it in. Need to cry? Then cry. Cry all you need to, if you have a close friend to support you, ask if they'll lend a shoulder. It's ok to be upset.
When you're not crying, though, think about the relationship. You say he was being cruel to you when you talked to him. Seems to me he was trying to push you away so you wouldn't like him so much anymore, making the breakup easier on him. Maybe he realised that he doesn't like you as much as he once thought, and instead of being honest and forward with you from the start, he waited until the relationship got too deep to simply turn back.
Well, think about it. Why would you need to be with somebody who obviously doesn't appreciate you? You don't. You can get over this, and you will. Let yourself grieve, but don't forget to start to get out, too. Go out with friends, especially in groups, and let yourself remember what it is to be single again. Do things that you'll have fun with. I know at first everything will remind you of him, but I promse that will pass, and soon enough you really won't feel that pain anymore.
[view]
ive been having a crush on this guy but the problem is that he is the total opposite of me.
he's into rock and im into rap.
im not friends wiht his friends and he isnt friends with my friends. but we say hi to each other but other than that there is no conversation between us.
and i dont know if he even likes me because once i heard him say that he doesnt like ppl who listen to crappy music like rap.
so i dont know wat to do now?
You don't have to like the same things or be into the same people to get to know eachother. If you have a crush on him - why not try to get to know him? There must be something about him that makes you like him, so see if there are any possibilities. Don't just write it off as impossible because you come from two different worlds.
If you two ending up having some kind of connection, the music you listen to shouldn't matter. Thing is, you'll never find out if you spend your time worrying about that instead of doing something about it.
[view]
I was wondering what I can do and say to get my ex-boyfriend back?
It seems like a lot of people ask this question, and there is always only one answer to give.
Unfortunately, if he really doesn't want to be with you, there is nothing you can do or say to really make him want you back. You can try to talk to him about why things ended, which you might deserve, but there's no way to change a person's feelings when it comes to this.
I understand it's hard to think about this when you're missing someone, but why are you so hung up on him? You may have had a good thing once, but think of it this way: it ended. It will probably stay that way. Now what is there to do? Start by keeping yourself busy. Go out with friends. Do things you love to do. Don't let the memeory of being with your ex make you lose who you are without him. Learn from how things went wrong with the relationship instead of being sad that things didn't go right. This should be a good thing! Work on yourself now, and don't put yourself off. You're too important to put your thoughts on trying to bring back something that didn't work instead of getting your own life back.
[view]
Ok, yes I'm the same person that's been writing the rumor questions. My boyfriend isn't coming to school the last few days and I can't get ahold of him on the phone, so I decided I wanted this advice now. Today me and my best friend were walking around the school and we started talking to one of my boyfriend's friends. My friend had her cell phone and said that I should call my b/f. And his friend said, "he's half gay." And we asked how he knew. And he said "cause he told us." Do you think this is reason to believe he is bi? And if it is what should I do? I mean as long as he loves me it doesn't really matter much, but still...it's wierd!
Why don't you simply ask him? If he's told someone else, he should be honest with you too - and also, it might just be a rumour.
Honestly, I don't know why people get so caught up in talking about other people like that.
Also, I'm glad that if he is bi, you don't think it's some horrible thing. There's nothing wrong with it as long as you're honest with eachother. Maybe he was afraid to tell you, if this is indeed the truth.
[view]
Hey i'm Leah and i'm 16/F. Okay, so me and my ex were together or almost 2 years we broke up like 6 months ago. We haven't talked for at least 5 months and we had a really love/hate relationship, but we were like eachothers best friend. I still LOVE him soo much and i've tried calling him but he wont talk and were not aloud to talk to each..his parents hate me and mine hate him were not aloud to be around eachother..What should i do? Should I just let go..?
I know where you're comeing from in a way. My boyfriend and I were together for two years before we broke up, and I'm still very attached to him, still think of him, still miss him. But - the best way to try and get over someone is to not contact him. He stopped calling and talking to me, and although it still hurts and is hard to move on, it's really probably what's best for both of us. Try to get out a lot, keep yourself busy, and get your mind off of him. With enough time, you'll be able to move on.
[view]
okay. so i dated this girl for a while. and we seemed to have a really good connection with each other. we were into the same things, we were both sarcastic smartasses, and we both liked doing the same kinda stuff. and well when i met her she was in the process of breaking up with her boyfriend. and so i was more of the friend to turn to than anything else. then slowly we started to date like after they broke up. and for about a weekend we were very into each other, and things seemed to be wonderful. then as the weekend ended she said she didn't feel the same way about me as i did about her. and so i decided to sit back and wait until she was really ready for a relationship because after some talking we kinda realized she needed some time to get back into the swing of things. and it was during this time that she began to change. she became mean, she began just totally ignoring me for days on end. the phone calls ceased. there would be whole days when i'd hear nothing from her. then i'd talk to her a bit and that was it. and now finally i come home to find out she spent the last couple days drinking, partying, and hanging out with sleazy guys. and i instantly became very mad and jealous. and i just wanna know. is it wrong for me to be mad? for me to not want her around? for me to tell her she's changed and become someone i don't know anymore? i told her not to contact me any longer, and that she had become someone else, someone i didn't know or love. and now in hindsight i kinda wanna know: was it wrong?
You aren't wrong for being angry - she obviously didn't think of your feelings when she decided to go out drinking with sleazy men. You have every right to be mad, and if you don't want her in your life anymore, then you have every right to tell her not to contact you any more.
Just keep in mind, she must be more unstable than you'd realized after the breakup. She found herself leaning on you for support and moving into another possible relationship too fast. I can picture this making her feel really insecure and making up for it by making things even worse for herself.
If it seems like she's calming down, and you felt up for it, (or if she initiates it) it wouldn't hurt to talk to her. This all depends on how deeply you feel for her. Is there a chance she might let go of this new crappy personality if given the chance? Give it time, but if you still feel you want to sever all ties with her, stick with it. Being friends with her after this would be uncomfortable at best.
[view]
is there anything wrong with a bi racial realationship
Of course there's nothing wrong with it.
[view]
Me and my boyfriend kissed for the first time a while back, and now he keeps wanting to do it every day. I'm afraid if we keep kissing every day, we'll soon grow bored of it and move of to sex. I don't want to take things too fast. So what should I do?
One of the most important things to remember when you're in any relationship is that you should be comfortable with that relationship. This means you should be comfortable with the physical part of you being with your boyfriend, along with the emotional. If you don't want to keep kissing him, you really don't have to - and never feel like you have to continue to kiss him just because he's your boyfriend.
Having said all of that, if you do in fact want to continue to kiss him but don't want it to lead to sex, that's a boundary that can be set. If he respects you at all, he'll respect your decision not to have sex and making out won't be a huge issue.
Noe, if he doesn't really respect you, and ever forces you to do anything you don't want to do, tell someone right away - and get the hell out of the relationship. You should never feel pressured to become more physically involved than you want to, stay true to yourself about that.
[view]
I'm involoved with a married man and have been for two years now. We started out as just friends and the relatonship evolved.He's scared to leave his wife because they share two children together. I'm very much in love with him and want to be with him. Lately I've been feeling he's been wasting my time because he hasn't left her yet and I feel he never will. When I ask when will he leave or make a decision on leaving, he tells me he cant leave his kids with her and wants to know he could get full custody before he leaves. What should I do in this situatuion? HEEEELLLLLPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!
I don't mean to offend. I'm sure that when you began to get romantically involved with this man, you didn't intend for things to remain complicated. However. If he hasn't left his wife yet, it doesn't seem that he ever will. You might want to start asking yourself some questions about this man's character. Why was he willing to continue cheating on his wife? Would he cheat on you, too? Why is he so afraid to leave a woman he must not really love?
You have to think about yourself right now. Be honest. Is this really good for you, to become increasingly loyal to a man who doesn't even seem to be loyal to his wife, (or, if he indeed loves you) himself?
The fact that this man has children definately further complicates things, but shouldn't necessarily affect his decision about leaving his current wife. My suggestion is, if you really feel it is worth fighting, to tell him that you can't wait forever - he has to choose you, or his wife.
If he does end up staying with his wife, don't take it as an insult on your own character - take it as an opportunity to get out of a messy situation that was most likely going nowhere.
I hope things do work out.
-ronlina
[view]
I really need some advice about me and my ex-girlfriend. i don't know what to do. i miss her, or at least i think i do. i don't know if i miss HER or just miss someone to be with. my friends seem to think it's the latter, but i don't think it is. is my brain broke??? is it normal to be so confused?? i just don't know. should i talk to her and tell her what i'm feeling, or should i just move on?
I guess the best thing to think about is, why did you break up with her in the first place? How did you feel about her while you were with her? There must have been some kind of reason why you two broke up. If you don't think about this, then if you DO get back together, there's a massive chance that it could fall apart again. Things have to be all or nothing,(you can't half-ass a relationship or not both be on the same page) and it wouldn't be fair to either of you to get back into a relationship if it was based on just missing having someone to be with. If you're going to be with this person, it has to be because you really feel that strongly about her, and not just because you need her around to make you feel better about yourself.
You can take what your friends say as something to think about, but it really depends on what you (and her) think. You might just really need to be apart for a while to get a good look at everything. In fact, you might need time apart to get a good look at yourself without her. She might need the same thing, time to be on her own without you.
I bet if you talked to her, she'd listen.
[view]
Okay, this guy asked me out and I really like him in all but he is shorter than me. Please don't leave well if you like him then it wouldn't bother you. I know that I need advice on how it won't affect me, if that makes any since?! PLease Help!!!
Well, in all honesty, what's the problem with him being shorter? It seems that you could at least give him a chance, go on a date (not to say that you'd go out, as I don't know how well you know him) and see how his personality is. One day, he may grow. If he's stopped growing, then the least you can do is give him a chance, because he may be really fun to hang around. Height really isn't very important to tell you the truth. If you're afraid of what others think, then screw them. Hopefully you'll be able to look past his height and have a good time with him, if you like him, that is.
[view]
My husband is almost 40, I am just 34. We have been married 10 years but have known each other for 18 years. Sex was always good between us. Lately we haven't had any. I keep asking him if there is someone else in his life because a man can't go as long as he does without it. He says no, he just doesn't need it. I do and have considered leaving him because he doesn't meet my needs. When we do have it, it's almost like it's a chore for him. How can I deal with this? Is it possible there is someone else?
You should talk to him about your needs and his needs. It's always a possibility that he was telling the truth and just isn't in the mood as often - is this an abrupt change? Has it been more gradual? I think you should probably discuss everything with your husband and explain how much it's bothering you. Hopefully this is osmething you'll be able to work through without ending a 10+ year relationship.
[view]
I'm going into my senior year of high school and I haven't had a boyfriend in almost a year. (its by choice) But my question is
Only if you want to. I'm going into my senior year - I do have a boyfriend, but if I didn't it wouldn't bother me much. You never should feel you need a boyfriend just for the sake of having one. It's a good idea if you find a boy you like that likes you back. In all honesty, though, relationships can add a lot of stress to your life that you may not want to deal with. Unless you really find you feel something for some boy, don't stress about boyfriends.
[view]
Okay so i admit, i've never had a boyfriend. im 14 years old and going into 8th grade. ive been told by guys that im really pretty and have a great personality. im not overweight, im not unpopular or stuck up. what keeps me from being something guys like? i have guy friends, but whenever i like a guy, they never like me back as much. i dont think highly of myself when im around people. i actually tend to be more shy then anything around guys. but, what can i do? i know every guy is different but... ugh im so stumped!! please help, if you answer my question good ill give you a rewarding 5! =) thanks!
ps: im not just trying to get a boyfriend because of people around me having them, its whenever i find someone i like, they dont feel the same...
That really isn't uncommon. Don't feel so inferior around other people! There is no need for that. Feel good about yourself, and stay friends with your guy-friends. Unfortunately, you can't make anyone like you - but this doesn't mean no one will. Not to mention, that there may very well be guys that like you and you don't even know it!
Are the guys that you usually have feelings for your friends? I recall my 7th-8th grade years being full of guys who were my buddies, but once they were close enough to me to be friends, they wouldn't cross that line.
You can't do anythign about that, but things may change. Just wait it out, you don't really need a boyfriend right now anyway. Perhaps you'll get in touch with someone you like, perhaps you won't. You have plenty of time for that, so just keep feeling good about yourself.
[view]
Okay, the thing is, I'm confused. I know this is going to sound stupid, but I need to ask. People are always asking about tips on kissing and making out. I've never done either of those things, but what gets me muddled is the whole 'it comes naturally' thing. I mean, is it really based on instinct, or should i be worried about my first time doing all those things? (I'm having a hard time getting my point across here, work with me). People ask things like 'where should i put my hands' and 'what kind of kiss' and 'how do you french'. Are those things that you really need advice about, or do they really all come naturally and people only fret because they haven't done them? Is it better to have people tell you how-to's so it'll go better, or is it all going to come together anyway? I hope you don't find me too silly for asking, I'm just(like I stated before) confused! Thank you to all who choose to answer
People genrelaly get all fussed about these things, especially before they have done them. As long as you're comfortable with whatever your actions are, you'll be fine and need no assistence. It's pretty hard to mess up kissing, for example. You just go with what you feel. Thinking too much during such actions will probably make the moment akward, anyway. People really generally worry for nothing.
[view]
Kevin1986 here again. I've been hearing a lot about guys only look at looks and everything like that. Lemme set the record straight here. If a girl is hott,she's a lot more likely to get asked out,true enough. But very few guys will tolerate a hot bitch. We're much more likely to go for the average looking girl with a great personality. I get pissed when we're made to look the bad guy and not every guy is as shallow as you describe. And besides,who are you more likely to ask out,Brad Pitt or the nice fat guy down the street? Stop being so hypocritical.
Both men and women can be shallow. That's the way it is. True dat, true dat. I hear ya, brutha.
[view]
Okay i have my bf of 4 years you all know this if you answerd one of my questions before and all but anyway...
I love him to death but there are times where he really frustrates me like today he wanted to see me and i had things to do and same with yesterday hes like you made plans with me and i never did hes really bad at forgetting things too...but he gets really selfish on things all the time like wanting too see me..well me i have dance and soccer practice and house stuff that i do all the time and i still try and make time for him but when i have littel things that come up he gets pissed when i think that he should really just understand that these things can come up...What advice would you give me to give him beside the things i already say to him like love goes fonder when not together i mean yeah you miss the person but for me i love him more nd more every second and everything and there are times when i like to just be by myself in my room and not have him here...what do you think i should tell him besides the things that i already tell him?
-Cassi-
Four years is a long time to be in a relationship, and all relationships are going to take work. Because you have demanding hobbies such as dance and soccer, he might just be immature enough to get jealous of those activities, because you aren't spending time with him. Let him know you care about him, but these activities are things you will not give up. Tell him you'll set aside a certain time each day, maybe - to talk to him on the phone or hang out. Let him know you care, but that you want to do all the things that make you happy, including seeing him. You're still two separate people, and you both should be able to spend time apart without it being an issue.
[view]
So i've been going out with this girl for almost 8 months now, right? Anyways, I love her a lot, I really do, I just dont know if I am really what she wants anymore. She teases me about other guys and stuff constantly, and she really gives me the impression that she doesnt love me as much as she used to. Can someone help me on what I should do?
Unfortunately, you can't really do a lot about her changing feelings - if they have indeed changed. The only thing you can really do is talk to her. Tell her what you've just typed - that you've noticed her teasing you and that you think she might be losing feelings for you. Some people push their significant others away so that they don't have to initiate the breaking-up. I don't really think that's very fair, but the only way you can figure out what's in her head is to talk ot her, and be honest with her. Hopefully it's something that can be worked out, but if not, at least you went through with it now instead of waiting for the relationship to drag on longer.
[view]
ok well i like someone alot and that person likes me alot too, i wanna ask the person out but everybody tells me not to that i should wait for the person to ask me...should i just ask the person or should i wait? cuz it does seem like the person is gonna ask me...what should i do?
Who says you have to wait? Go ahead - if you have the confidence to do it, then I say go do it. It's great you have the guts to ask this person out - don't let anyone stop you!
[view]
I am 23 years old. I just moved to California from Alaska with my boyfriend. The problem is, i do not think i love him. I am still in love with my guy friend back home. I am very unhappy in my current realtionship. I told him i wanted to go back home to Alaska. He agreed, but i am afraid once we get there, I will not want to be with him anymore. I want to be happy. My guy friend back home loves me also and i know that he would be with me and we would be happy but i do not want to break my boyfriends heart. What do i do to make this easy for us all?
Sounds like you have to really think on the choices you make. If you made up your mind, and really believe you love your friend back home, then go for it. As for your boyfriend, there is little you can do to soften the blow. Some important things to hit are why you want to end the relationship and why you aren't happy. There really is no way to make it 'easy', because you are probably going to break someone's heart one way or another. Sit with your boyfriend and explain to him what's going on inside your head. It'll be hard for him to take, so try to be sensitive. Don't be too harsh if it's specifically him that you have a problem with in the relationship, but try to tell him the truth, he deserves to know it.
[view]
|
